- 2 months ago
Matrimoney - Full Movie
Category
🎥
Short filmTranscript
00:00:00Married.
00:00:01What?
00:00:02Yeah, and I can't marry someone who picks up dog crap for a living.
00:00:05Well, at least I don't pose in my tighty-whities for money.
00:00:08Here, place your mind.
00:00:09I'm not staying in a doghouse.
00:00:12Ahem.
00:00:13Can you guys just keep it down? I have work tomorrow morning.
00:00:16Sorry.
00:00:17Hey, Amelia.
00:00:20Looks like someone needs obedience.
00:00:22Are you gonna let him talk to me like that, Amelia?
00:00:25You started.
00:00:26Asshole!
00:00:26Crazy bitch!
00:00:28You told her?
00:00:28She's my sister.
00:00:30I don't care. That violates our agreement.
00:00:32How?
00:00:33What the fuck?
00:00:37Michelangelo?
00:00:38Don't look at that.
00:00:40You're such a hypocrite.
00:00:41I wish I never agreed to this awful engagement.
00:00:43I fucking hate you.
00:00:45I fucking hate you more.
00:00:53How was it?
00:00:55Well...
00:00:56That was the best sex I've ever had in my life.
00:00:58Wait, what are you doing?
00:01:02That is an original.
00:01:03I'm so sick of your bullshit.
00:01:06Oh, fine!
00:01:07I'll just hop in my time machine, go back to ancient Rome, and get another one.
00:01:10I don't care about your art, your money, your stupid mansion.
00:01:13You're treating me like shit.
00:01:14That's from the renaissance.
00:01:16That's from the renaissance.
00:01:17You are history's worst nightmare.
00:01:19I tried to make this work with you.
00:01:20We signed a contract.
00:01:21For an arranged marriage.
00:01:23Did you actually think this arrangement would be anything more than a business transaction?
00:01:27You are such a simpleton.
00:01:30Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.
00:01:32Well, at least I'm not a spoiled brat.
00:01:35I tried to get along with you.
00:01:36You brought this on to yourself.
00:01:38I wish I never agreed to this awful engagement.
00:01:40Right back at you.
00:01:42I fucking hate you.
00:01:43I fucking hate you more.
00:01:45So, you were arrested.
00:02:09Again.
00:02:12To be fair, when we thought I was legal, we'll just swim there.
00:02:15There is a fence around that reservoir.
00:02:19It says here that you broke in using bolt cutters.
00:02:24If I had known you invited me over here to lecture me, I wouldn't have came.
00:02:30Come on, Gucci.
00:02:31Come on.
00:02:33Good boy.
00:02:35Oh.
00:02:40Come on, Gucci.
00:02:41Let's go.
00:02:42Hey, Amelia.
00:02:43Come on, Gucci.
00:02:51Let's go.
00:02:56You know, every time the paparazzi catch you acting crazy, it reflects on me.
00:03:02It reflects on the company that your mother and I built with our bare hands.
00:03:06The same one that pays for your ridiculous lifestyle.
00:03:10I make my own money.
00:03:12See, see.
00:03:14Underwear modeling, Lord.
00:03:15I am the spokesperson for man thumb.
00:03:18That means free underwear for life.
00:03:20For life.
00:03:22Some parents would be proud.
00:03:23Yeah.
00:03:23Other parents would be prouder if you went to your real job now and then.
00:03:28You are next up to be CEO at Dino Verlino Cosmetics.
00:03:32Now, how can I give you that job if you keep acting like a Kardashian, huh?
00:03:37Hmm.
00:03:37All right.
00:03:39Don't forget the meeting this afternoon, all right?
00:03:41And don't be late.
00:03:44Bye, Dad.
00:03:54Excuse me.
00:03:55Excuse me.
00:03:56Hello, my Gucci.
00:04:06Why won't Michelangelo just grow up, huh?
00:04:09He needs to settle down and find himself a nice girl, huh?
00:04:14Like you, Amelia.
00:04:16Good one, Romulus.
00:04:26These are great.
00:04:36I still don't have what I'm looking for.
00:04:39Do you guys mind staying a little longer?
00:04:41No problem.
00:04:42Cool.
00:04:43Let's take five, and then I want to see you in that leopard print.
00:04:50Hi.
00:04:51I'm Michelangelo.
00:04:53Chantal.
00:04:54Nice to meet you.
00:04:55I couldn't notice how hot you are.
00:04:59I've got tickets to the premiere...
00:05:03Hold that thought.
00:05:07Hey, Dad.
00:05:08Where the hell were you?
00:05:11Dad, I'm on a photo shoot.
00:05:13You're supposed to be at the office.
00:05:15Geppetto came here all the way from Milano.
00:05:18I can meet him later.
00:05:19Nah, Sueliden's back on the plane again.
00:05:22Well, you're the one who planned the meeting during my shoot.
00:05:23Michelangelo, you are 31 years old.
00:05:26You've got to stop acting like an idiot teenager.
00:05:29You could be running the world's largest cosmetic company right now.
00:05:33You interned.
00:05:34You went to business school.
00:05:35You have potential, okay?
00:05:38But you say you want to be the CEO?
00:05:40Well, you're going to have to prove it.
00:05:41Because so far...
00:05:43I ain't seen the ante from you.
00:05:46But...
00:05:47Hey.
00:05:51You okay?
00:05:53Yeah.
00:05:54Um...
00:05:55But...
00:05:55I'd be a lot better if you'd go out with me, it's fine.
00:05:58So, it's a really rare form of cancer.
00:06:16Luckily, my doctors did catch it early.
00:06:21Oh my God.
00:06:22There is an experimental treatment.
00:06:25But it's really expensive.
00:06:28And my insurance doesn't cover it.
00:06:30Don't worry about that.
00:06:32I have money saved.
00:06:34I'll find the rest.
00:06:36We will figure this out, okay?
00:06:37We're going to get through this together.
00:06:41You're welcome.
00:06:54Ciao, Gucci.
00:06:56Did she have a good walk?
00:07:01What's wrong?
00:07:05Yeah.
00:07:07I'm sorry.
00:07:08This...
00:07:09No, no, forget about it.
00:07:10I'm sorry about your sister.
00:07:12The treatments are just really expensive.
00:07:15I have a savings.
00:07:17For my doggy daycare.
00:07:18My dream, but...
00:07:22It's only enough for one treatment.
00:07:24And who knows how many she's going to need.
00:07:26Betsy practically raised us.
00:07:29After our parents passed,
00:07:31I would do anything for her.
00:07:35Amelia.
00:07:35I think I might know how to get you that money.
00:07:40You do?
00:07:41Hmm.
00:07:42Come back tonight.
00:07:44And, uh...
00:07:46Wear something nice.
00:07:49Come on, baby.
00:07:50Come on, baby.
00:07:50Come on.
00:07:58Oh, Amelia, you look bellissima.
00:08:01Except for the dog hair.
00:08:06Come with me.
00:08:08I have someone I want you to meet.
00:08:11Are they from Italy?
00:08:12Yes.
00:08:13Wow.
00:08:13Yes, of course, everything's from Italy here.
00:08:17Well, Amelia, meet Michelangelo, my son.
00:08:22I believe you both bumped into each other yesterday.
00:08:24Aren't you the cleaning lady?
00:08:28I'm a dog walker.
00:08:29Don't be so defensive.
00:08:32I wasn't.
00:08:37Well, I suppose I'll let you two get acquainted.
00:08:40I have some unfinished business to do.
00:08:42Why don't you give yourself a glass of vino?
00:08:44I'm really happy.
00:08:46Hey, arrivederci, huh?
00:08:48Do you want to do me a favor?
00:09:01What?
00:09:02Exactly.
00:09:10How does it look?
00:09:12Not half bad.
00:09:13I mean, it's fine.
00:09:15Whatever.
00:09:18Let's do some sexy ones, okay?
00:09:22Or not.
00:09:23I don't feel like being your photographer all night.
00:09:25You work for my dad.
00:09:27You have to do what I say.
00:09:28You don't look like Romulus to me.
00:09:31Just a few more pictures.
00:09:33I'm not here to update your Tinder profile.
00:09:35I don't need Tinder.
00:09:36I'm an underwear model.
00:09:37My DMs are flooded like Florida in a hurricane.
00:09:41Whatever.
00:09:41For me another.
00:09:48I told you, I'm...
00:09:49Now.
00:09:53Fine.
00:09:59See?
00:10:00Dog Walker.
00:10:01That wasn't so hard.
00:10:02What the fuck?
00:10:07This is fucking product!
00:10:13Asshole.
00:10:14You crazy bitch!
00:10:18Amelia!
00:10:19Whoa.
00:10:20What's wrong?
00:10:21I asked her to pour me another drink, and she flipped out!
00:10:25I'm sorry, Romulus, but your son is a prick.
00:10:28I'm going to be leaving.
00:10:28No, no, no.
00:10:28Please.
00:10:29I apologize.
00:10:31My son, he's just immature.
00:10:33All right?
00:10:33And that's why I invited you to put forward it.
00:10:37Please.
00:10:38All right?
00:10:39Just have a seat.
00:10:40All right?
00:10:40And I promise, he'll be on his best behavior for the rest of the night.
00:10:43Won't you, son?
00:10:43So, Amelia needs money to pay for her sister's cancer treatment.
00:10:50Cancer?
00:10:51Hmm.
00:10:52Yeah.
00:10:53And you need to settle down and prove that you're worthy of running the family business.
00:10:57Make my own money, Dad.
00:11:00Okay.
00:11:01I want the business.
00:11:03Now.
00:11:03I think we can, uh, make a deal whereby everyone gets what they want.
00:11:10What kind of deal?
00:11:11Oh, well, it's nothing crazy.
00:11:15No.
00:11:16You two just have to get married, that's all.
00:11:19What?
00:11:21What?
00:11:22Romulus, what are you saying?
00:11:24I can't marry the male Paris Hilton.
00:11:26Yeah, and I can't marry someone who picks up dog crap for a living.
00:11:30Well, at least I don't pose in my tighty-whities for money.
00:11:33Angelo, look, you have to grow up before you can run out business.
00:11:38And the best way to do that is to get married.
00:11:40We're not even a match.
00:11:42We hate each other.
00:11:43At least I do.
00:11:44Obviously.
00:11:45I see.
00:11:46There's something uncommon already.
00:11:49Look, you know, my wife and I, we were opposites.
00:11:53Oh, yeah.
00:11:53We were like pizza and Hawaiian pizza.
00:11:57She sure drove me crazy when we first met.
00:11:59Yeah, I know you're probably thinking I'm just some old fool, huh?
00:12:03But I learned a thing or two in 70 years.
00:12:07You two have chemistry.
00:12:09Yeah, like a nuclear bomb.
00:12:11As if.
00:12:13Romulus, isn't there another way?
00:12:15I don't want to be miserable for the rest of my life.
00:12:17Amelia, you do want to help your sister, don't you?
00:12:20Well, you'll be able to afford the treatment if you just agree to this arrangement.
00:12:24What's it going to be?
00:12:34What's it going to be?
00:12:37Fine.
00:12:39I'll do it.
00:12:41For Betsy.
00:12:45Well, Angelo, it's not polite to keep a lovely lady waiting.
00:12:49If you're not going to agree to marry her, then you're going to lose the business.
00:12:55And you're also going to lose your inheritance.
00:12:58What the hell, Dad?
00:13:02Fuck it.
00:13:03Fine.
00:13:04I'll do it.
00:13:05Now, let's just go into the office now.
00:13:09The lorries have already drafted the contract.
00:13:11And, son, we are going to need some champagne.
00:13:15Right, my mom.
00:13:16Try and make yourself look decent now.
00:13:21You will be engaged for a period of 30 days.
00:13:24Followed by a wedding planned by me.
00:13:27And I'll tell you, it's going to be a big one for the ages, too.
00:13:31I hope the Hollywood Bowl's not booked.
00:13:33Anyway, you must move in together immediately to avoid any suspicion, you know.
00:13:39Look, there's nothing wrong with an unarranged marriage, but, well, it can't do any good if word got out to the public, right?
00:13:46That's why this has to be our own secret.
00:13:49Are we agreed?
00:13:51Sure.
00:13:52All right.
00:13:54Sign in.
00:13:54Sign in.
00:13:54Salute to the new couple.
00:14:15So, your place or mine?
00:14:27I'm missing a doghouse.
00:14:29Fine.
00:14:31Then we'll stay at yours.
00:14:32So, this is Michelangelo's place.
00:14:45It's like a museum in here.
00:14:47A Michelangelo museum.
00:14:49Ugh.
00:14:50Whoa, whoa, whoa.
00:15:05What was this?
00:15:06Put it in the trash.
00:15:07This isn't trash.
00:15:09These are my sisters.
00:15:09She's an artist.
00:15:11So, put them in your room.
00:15:12I said you could live here, not decorate.
00:15:14Oh, I'm sorry.
00:15:15Is it clashing with your banana hammock?
00:15:17That's man-thong.
00:15:19It's trademarked.
00:15:24Look, I gotta go meet somebody.
00:15:26If this isn't cleaned up by the time I get back, we'll throw it all in the fireplace.
00:15:30It's electric.
00:15:36Oh, by the way, this is gonna work.
00:15:40You might want to start wearing that.
00:15:44Gee, thanks.
00:15:44Thanks.
00:15:45Welcome.
00:15:53You're getting married?
00:15:54Shh, Betsy.
00:15:56Don't tell the whole world.
00:15:58Sorry, Amelia.
00:15:59It's just...
00:16:00It's not like you.
00:16:03You're saying we're...
00:16:04Reserved.
00:16:06Safe.
00:16:07Like I always taught you.
00:16:09Well, things change when you find out your sister has cancer.
00:16:15And besides, Michelangelo offered to help pay for some of your treatments.
00:16:19So, I'm okay with a quick proposal.
00:16:22Michelangelo?
00:16:24The Ninja Turtle?
00:16:25No.
00:16:27Michelangelo...
00:16:28Dino Valino?
00:16:29Maybe you've heard of him?
00:16:32Michelangelo Dino Valino?
00:16:33No.
00:16:33Shh.
00:16:38Is Socialite Man or how to start a hundred canceled Bravo shows?
00:16:42How did you even meet?
00:16:44His dad is one of my clients.
00:16:47It's been a whirlwind of a romance.
00:16:51He's so toxic.
00:16:55Speak of the devil.
00:16:58Oh, yeah.
00:16:59You know, that's probably an old issue.
00:17:03This is a doctor's office.
00:17:06Amelia.
00:17:08Betsy Carlisle?
00:17:11Doctor's ready.
00:17:13We'll talk about this later.
00:17:14We're just going to wet, baby.
00:17:39We're already wet.
00:17:40Where did that come from?
00:17:58Nice place.
00:18:25I love the artwork.
00:18:26Thanks, Marlon.
00:18:28Thanks, Marlon.
00:18:29Oh, good taste.
00:18:31Oh, I'm good.
00:18:33You had plenty at dinner.
00:18:35More for me.
00:18:37You know, if you like it down here, you should see the bedroom.
00:18:53Who are you?
00:18:54Who are you?
00:18:55Who are you?
00:18:56Chantel, this is Amelia, my roommate.
00:19:00Whatever.
00:19:01Whatever.
00:19:02Can you guys just keep it down?
00:19:03I have work tomorrow morning.
00:19:04This is my house?
00:19:05We will be as loud as we want to be.
00:19:06Scream at the top of our lungs!
00:19:07You've got to be kidding me.
00:19:08What's wrong, Doug Walker?
00:19:09Who's jealous?
00:19:10Who's jealous?
00:19:11I'm not jealous.
00:19:12I can't believe he said I was jealous.
00:19:13How could I ever want to be with a party boy like him?
00:19:17Even if he is kinda hot.
00:19:18I can't believe he said I was jealous.
00:19:19How could I ever want to be with a party boy like him?
00:19:20Even if he is kinda hot.
00:19:21I can't believe he said I was jealous.
00:19:23How could I ever want to be with a party boy like him?
00:19:25Even if he is kinda hot.
00:19:26I can't believe he said I was jealous.
00:19:39How could I ever want to be with a party boy like him?
00:19:42Even if he is kinda hot.
00:19:56See you later.
00:20:03And, um, don't worry about last night.
00:20:07Sorry.
00:20:08I had one too many to drink.
00:20:10It won't happen again.
00:20:11Better not.
00:20:12How's the hangover, roomie?
00:20:26Not now.
00:20:27My head's killing me.
00:20:28We need to talk about last night.
00:20:30No.
00:20:31What we need to do is order a three egg omelet and home fries.
00:20:34I don't care if you're fooling around with your bimbos.
00:20:37Monogamy wasn't in the contract.
00:20:39But your dad doesn't want people knowing that this is an arranged marriage.
00:20:42And you made it pretty clear to that girl last night that you don't care about me.
00:20:45Fine.
00:20:46I'll have her sign an NDA.
00:20:47Just give me my phone.
00:20:48My sister needs this money, Michelangelo.
00:20:52And if the paparazzi find out about this, then the contract is violated.
00:20:56Then neither of us get what we want.
00:20:58Yeah, no shit.
00:20:59I'm serious.
00:21:00Don't screw this up.
00:21:02I've been dealing with paparazzi since I was a teenager.
00:21:06I know what I'm doing.
00:21:08Dog walker.
00:21:09And just so we're clear.
00:21:10I will fuck whoever I want.
00:21:12Whenever I want.
00:21:13Wherever I want.
00:21:15Fine.
00:21:16Do whatever you want.
00:21:18Sorry.
00:21:19It's a bit harsh.
00:21:21I'm just really...
00:21:23hungover.
00:21:25You're over.
00:21:26That could have gone better.
00:21:28Oh, hey.
00:21:29Hey, baby.
00:21:30You know, you don't have to keep working, Amelia.
00:21:31You're rich now.
00:21:32I know.
00:21:33I like it.
00:21:34Oh, that's good to hear.
00:21:35You know, I just hope that your work ethic rubs off on my son.
00:21:36Tell me, how are things going between the two of you, huh?
00:21:38Oh, fine.
00:21:39Yeah.
00:21:40We're still getting to know each other.
00:21:41All right.
00:21:42Well, give him time, all right?
00:21:43Oh, and listen.
00:21:44He is not as bad as TMZ says, all right?
00:21:45Look, I promise.
00:21:46I wouldn't be so sure.
00:21:47Yeah.
00:21:48You're right.
00:21:49Well, we'll see you later.
00:21:50Yeah.
00:21:51Come on, Gucci.
00:21:53Come on.
00:21:54Bye, Gucci.
00:21:55Bye, Gucci.
00:21:56Bye, Gucci.
00:21:57him time, all right? Oh, and listen, he is not as bad as TMZ says, all right? Look, I promise.
00:22:04I wouldn't be so sure. Yeah, you're right. Well, we'll see you later. Yeah. Come on,
00:22:11Gucci. Come on. Bye, Gooch. Hey, Amelia. Hey, Jake. Gucci, no. Royce. It's a bad dog,
00:22:24but I'm not actually mad about this. It's to see you up close for once. Yeah, same here.
00:22:38Sorry, Gucci's a bit crazy. His whole family, actually. All these rich people are nuts.
00:22:46I should make a reality show. We're old dog owners of Beverly Hills.
00:22:50Do you want to walk together? Let these two get to know each other? Yeah, I'd like that.
00:23:04So, how long have you been a dog walker? A couple months. I like it. I had a bunch of terrible gigs
00:23:11before. Barista, Uber driver, delivery guy. Movie extra? You were in a movie. Actually,
00:23:20it was a toothpaste commercial. Just trying to impress you. How about you? How long you been doing this?
00:23:26I don't know. My whole life, I guess. It started as a summer job, and then I turned it into my own
00:23:32business. I want to open a doggy daycare someday. Wow. I guess you really like dogs. Well,
00:23:39they're easier to hang out with than humans sometimes. If you want to hang out with this
00:23:45human sometime. My band's playing at the Echoplex tonight. Do you want to go? I kind of have to
00:23:52admit, I had a crush on you. You did? Yeah. I still do. He's cute. I wish he'd asked me out
00:24:06before I got legally engaged. Then again, that fuckboy has been out having fun.
00:24:12I'd love to go to the concert. Hell yeah. I mean, uh, regular. Yeah.
00:24:24I know it's risky, but I'm not a socialite like Michelangelo. I won't have to worry about
00:24:30paparazzi spotting me at the show. Hey, what's your ring? Um, it's just a class ring from high
00:24:39school. Looks pretty big. It was a big school. Public schools. Am I right?
00:24:52I mean, it kind of looks like an engagement ring. Me? Engaged? No. Are you kidding? I'm 24.
00:24:59I'm practically still a baby. I mean, I should be wearing diapers, crawling around, drooling.
00:25:05Nope. Single and ready to mingle. Okay.
00:25:12Royce pooped. You should pick it up. Where? I don't see it. Just over there.
00:25:24Do I have to wear a suit every day? Of course. It's an office. You want to be CEO, you got to look
00:25:30depart. You mean like, you look like Willy Wonka without the chocolate factory? Very funny.
00:25:37You know, I'm retiring next year. Yes, I know. Yeah. That means you got to get up to speed
00:25:41rapidamente. So today you're going to be my shadow, you'll be my extra hands, and we got a lot to do.
00:25:47Can I get Starbucks first? Fuck no. Come on, dad.
00:25:50Okay. Wow. Oh my goodness. Are you okay? Hi, I'm Michelangelo.
00:26:07You're engaged, remember? And this is our new palette. It's Matt's collection. He really
00:26:21liked these colors, so we did them twice. But yeah, that's a presentation by me, Michelangelo.
00:26:30What, dad? What a day, dad. It's not even lunchtime yet. Look at you, you got so lazy just sitting
00:26:44around taking pictures of yourself all the time. Just stick with it, will you, kid? Hard work does
00:26:50pay off. Let me just look at Amelia. What about her? She comes from nothing, son. Nobody taught her how to
00:26:57run a business, but she just worked hard, and now, well, now she earned some money doing
00:27:02what she loves. I guess that's impressive. Yeah, see. See, it is. I hope she rubs off on
00:27:08you a little, you know? I just hope I don't get that uptight.
00:27:18Break's over.
00:27:27Well, not too bad, huh? One day down.
00:27:38Forty more years to go.
00:27:40Now, this is the time, when you go home with Amelia, you talk about the day's work, raise
00:27:49you closer together, comfort each other, just like your mom and I used to do. You know, I'm
00:27:56thinking, it's time for the world to meet Amelia tonight.
00:28:04Tonight? Shit. When am I going to tell Chantel? I promised we'd Netflix a bang tonight.
00:28:09The L.A. Zoo fundraiser. Lights, camera, red carpet. Perfect time to announce our lovely
00:28:15new addition to the Dino Verdea app.
00:28:19Don't you think it's a bit soon yet? I mean, we just signed the contract.
00:28:23What's the matter? You're getting along on it, aren't you?
00:28:27Yeah, yeah. We're just really starting to warm up to each other.
00:28:32All right, so it's all settled. I'll see you at eight o'clock tonight in the limo, and
00:28:36don't be late.
00:28:41Bye, Dad.
00:28:42So, remind me, why are we getting makeovers done again?
00:28:58Because I want to do something nice for my favorite big sister.
00:29:03And...
00:29:04You know I never splurge on stuff like this.
00:29:08But, since I'm part of the Dino Levino family now,
00:29:11I think I can afford to let my hair down.
00:29:13You better not let that hair down.
00:29:15Sorry. Just an expression.
00:29:17How's it going in there?
00:29:26I'm coming out.
00:29:36Is that bad?
00:29:37I've never seen a dog walker look this hot.
00:29:43Buy that dress.
00:29:45ASAP.
00:29:49Leave me alone, party boy.
00:29:51I've got my own function tonight.
00:29:53It's quite a good idea.
00:29:55It was fun.
00:29:56You can have a good time.
00:29:58One, two, three, three, four.
00:30:02Oh, my God.
00:30:02Oh, my God.
00:30:04Oh, my God.
00:30:06Oh, my God.
00:30:08Oh, my God.
00:30:11Oh, my God.
00:30:12Oh, my God.
00:30:14Oh, my God.
00:30:20Oh, my God.
00:30:22Oh, my God.
00:30:22What are you looking at?
00:30:30You're spilling all over yourself.
00:30:32Thanks.
00:30:32Um, I...
00:30:35Did you forget my name?
00:30:37No, it's just something different.
00:30:41Did you change your hair?
00:30:43Why do you care?
00:30:44The manwhorehouse is yours tonight.
00:30:46I'm going out.
00:30:47I just forgot my charger.
00:30:48Awesome, thanks.
00:30:49I'm taking this.
00:30:54Wait, I've been calling you.
00:30:55We're supposed to go to a fundraiser.
00:30:57I told you, I'm busy.
00:30:58Hold on!
00:31:02Amelia!
00:31:10Alright, hey.
00:31:11Look who's right on time.
00:31:13Nice.
00:31:14Where's Amelia?
00:31:16She's sick.
00:31:18She can't make it.
00:31:20Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, no.
00:31:21If your fiancé's sick, you know, you can't go out and party.
00:31:24Yeah, you got to stay home with her.
00:31:26Give her some nice soup.
00:31:29I'll catch both of you for the next one.
00:31:31Tell Amelia that I hope she feels better soon.
00:31:33Poor thing.
00:31:35Okay, Dad.
00:31:37See you in the office.
00:31:44Stupid dog walker?
00:31:45Tricking me with her makeover.
00:31:46I'll teach her to mess with my plans.
00:31:48Hey, it's Michael and I love Dean Levino.
00:31:59Do you still track people?
00:31:59Wow.
00:32:16Amelia.
00:32:17Hi.
00:32:19You look like you just walked off a runway.
00:32:22Without a dog.
00:32:23Sorry, I don't come to concerts often.
00:32:27I kind of panicked.
00:32:28No worries.
00:32:29I should have mentioned this is more of a $5 beer kind of place.
00:32:32Yeah.
00:32:33But you're drinking for free tonight.
00:32:35Talk to the bartender.
00:32:37Wow.
00:32:37Do you have good treatment?
00:32:39You look like one.
00:32:41Thanks, David.
00:32:43Hey, lover boy.
00:32:45We're on.
00:32:47Got to go.
00:32:49Find me in the green room after.
00:32:51Hope you like it.
00:32:52Break a leg.
00:32:53Love you, boy.
00:32:54Rock stars are so much better than underwear models.
00:33:16All I do is you know what I want, babe.
00:33:21You know what I want.
00:33:25Good.
00:33:26Nothing from Michelangelo.
00:33:27Maybe he's learned his lesson.
00:33:31One more, please.
00:33:36But that doesn't mean I'm not hooking up with Jake tonight.
00:33:38Jake, you guys feel great.
00:33:49You really think so?
00:33:51I just feel like we're ripping off the strokes.
00:33:53The who?
00:33:55You don't know the strokes.
00:33:59Are they older?
00:34:01I'm more of a top 40 kind of girl.
00:34:05It's all right.
00:34:06Lots of stuff to introduce you to.
00:34:08You want something to drink?
00:34:10Yeah.
00:34:17So, when did you learn how to play guitar?
00:34:21Since I was 13.
00:34:23Played in bands all through high school and college, but I feel like this one's finally going someplace.
00:34:28That's awesome.
00:34:29When I get my record deal, I can finally quit my job, focus on music full time.
00:34:35You're going to quit dog walking?
00:34:37I thought you liked it.
00:34:38I do, but it's just another gig until I hit it big in music.
00:34:43I don't even like dogs that much.
00:34:45I'm more of a cat person.
00:34:47A cat person?
00:34:51Who doesn't like dogs?
00:34:52Even Michelangelo's good with Gucci.
00:34:54I don't want to talk about work tonight.
00:34:57I just want to relax.
00:34:59Have a good time.
00:35:01You're beautiful, you know that.
00:35:06I thought I wanted to hook up with Jake.
00:35:08Now I'm not sure.
00:35:09We have nothing in common.
00:35:11Is it weird that I feel a tiny bit guilty?
00:35:13What the heck?
00:35:18I'm tipsy.
00:35:18He's cute.
00:35:20Michelangelo had his fun.
00:35:21Now I can have mine.
00:35:22Looks like someone needs obedience.
00:35:39What's going on?
00:35:40That's Michelangelo Dina Levino, the Nepo Baby underwear model.
00:35:45He's not.
00:35:46You coming with me, dog walker?
00:35:48Don't make me get the leash.
00:35:49What the hell, Michelangelo?
00:35:51Back off, dude.
00:35:53Back off.
00:35:54Grubby little hipster.
00:35:55She's my fiance.
00:35:57So that was an engagement ring?
00:35:59Jake, I can explain.
00:36:01Let's go.
00:36:02I'm really sorry, Jake.
00:36:06I'm not, Jake.
00:36:11This is for making me Uber all the way to fucking sober, Mike.
00:36:17And this is for making me listen to Andy.
00:36:25I can't believe you did that after your high and mighty speech.
00:36:28You're such a hypocrite.
00:36:29Yeah, well, I don't have the paparazzi following me around.
00:36:31I'm just an Italian-American psycho.
00:36:34I'm not following you around.
00:36:37You know what?
00:36:37I get it.
00:36:38You saw me with Chantel last night, and now you're jealous.
00:36:42Me jealous?
00:36:43Did you see the way that you were acting around Jake?
00:36:46Like, I would ever fuck a dog walker.
00:36:48I am more than a dog walker, you playboy prick.
00:36:51I have a name.
00:36:53Wait, what are you doing?
00:36:54That is an original.
00:36:55I'm so sick of your bullshit.
00:36:58Oh, fine.
00:36:59I'll just hop in my time machine, go back to H.
00:37:01and get another one.
00:37:02I don't care about your art, your money, your stupid mansion.
00:37:05You're treating me like shit.
00:37:08That's from the Renaissance.
00:37:09You are history's worst nightmare.
00:37:11I tried to make this work with you.
00:37:12We signed a contract.
00:37:14For an arranged marriage.
00:37:15Did you actually think this arrangement would be anything more than a business transaction?
00:37:19You are such a simpleton.
00:37:20Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.
00:37:25Well, at least I'm not a spoiled brat.
00:37:27I tried to get along with you.
00:37:29You brought this on to yourself.
00:37:30I wish I never agreed to this awful engagement.
00:37:32Right back at you.
00:37:34I fucking hate you.
00:37:36I fucking hate you more.
00:37:37I hate you more.
00:37:52I don't care.
00:37:59I didn't care about you.
00:38:29Where am I? Who's spooning me? Is that Jake? How drunk was I?
00:38:51Michelangelo?
00:38:55I forgot we did that last night. Must have been all those free beers. We don't have to talk about this, right?
00:39:08We had too many drinks. Just forget it ever happened. If that's what you want.
00:39:14Definitely. I have to go to work.
00:39:20I should get up too.
00:39:23Oh, my head.
00:39:25There's Pedialine in the fridge.
00:39:28Thanks for coming today, sis.
00:39:30Of course. My doctor did say I needed lots of exercise.
00:39:36Well, you look great. Thanks. I don't feel great. The treatment's taking a lot out of me.
00:39:45But you, on the other hand, are glowing today. What's going on?
00:39:51So... Michelangelo and I had sex last night.
00:39:56Wait. For the first time?
00:40:00Yeah. We're taking it slow.
00:40:03Michelangelo. The male gigolo is taking it slow.
00:40:08Maybe I did misjudge him.
00:40:11Maybe I did misjudge him.
00:40:13And... how was it?
00:40:15Well...
00:40:17Really bad. Right? I knew it.
00:40:20Actually... it was the best sex I ever had?
00:40:23Well, that explains the glow.
00:40:27I am happy for you, sis.
00:40:31Physical chemistry is important.
00:40:34That's actually what I wanted to talk to you about.
00:40:37I don't get it.
00:40:38He and I are nothing alike, and yet he knows how to push all of my buttons.
00:40:42I feel like... like an arcade game, and he just keeps getting the high score again and again and...
00:40:48You get the picture.
00:40:51Hey.
00:40:53Opposites attract.
00:40:55I mean, that's why you guys love each other so much.
00:40:59Because you're so different.
00:41:01Something like that.
00:41:03Oh.
00:41:11Here it comes.
00:41:12Right on the schedule.
00:41:13The dog walker's in love with me.
00:41:16I'll have to let her down easy.
00:41:18Weird.
00:41:19I haven't heard from the dog walker all morning.
00:41:21What was that about?
00:41:32Must be the hangover.
00:41:42Hey, I'd like to hang out tonight.
00:41:44Maybe we can finish what we started last time.
00:41:51Hey, unfortunately something came up.
00:42:01I...
00:42:02I can't make it tonight.
00:42:06Why can't I stop thinking about the dog walker?
00:42:08And why hasn't she texted me yet?
00:42:21Hey.
00:42:35Hi.
00:42:37We should talk about Leslie.
00:42:42I'm not very good with words.
00:42:44Me neither.
00:42:45But...
00:42:46Last night I...
00:42:47You don't have to say anything.
00:42:48We both know it was a mistake.
00:42:50And we can just go back to hating each other.
00:42:53Like nothing ever happened.
00:42:54I don't think you understand it.
00:42:55You just listen to me for a second.
00:42:57Look.
00:42:58You don't have to worry about me catching feelings.
00:42:59I'm a big girl.
00:43:00I've had a one night stand before.
00:43:03I've never been with someone like you before.
00:43:05Okay.
00:43:06I get it.
00:43:07I'm not one of your...
00:43:09Your models or your...
00:43:10Your D-list actresses.
00:43:12You don't have to give me some big speech about letting me down easily.
00:43:15I know that if you would take back last night that you would.
00:43:18I mean...
00:43:19Frankly so would I.
00:43:20I mean you're driving me nuts.
00:43:21You don't understand.
00:43:22Let's...
00:43:23Let's get some take out and figure this thing out.
00:43:26I don't need you to mansplain my own feelings to me.
00:43:29Wait.
00:43:30Did you just call me Amelia?
00:43:35What happened to dog walker?
00:43:36I have a confession to make.
00:43:42Last night...
00:43:44I don't know how.
00:43:45I don't know why.
00:43:47That was the best sex I've ever had in my life.
00:43:52Really?
00:43:53Do I look like I'm lying?
00:43:55I'm not a good actor.
00:43:57I could even do reality TV.
00:43:58But...
00:44:00There is...
00:44:02A fire between us Amelia.
00:44:03Some kind of crazy...
00:44:05Cosmic chemistry.
00:44:08You sound like you're...
00:44:10Reading a horoscope.
00:44:11Amelia.
00:44:13Please.
00:44:15I know you felt it too.
00:44:22Amelia.
00:44:23Please.
00:44:24Don't act like you didn't feel it too.
00:44:27I felt it too.
00:44:33So why are we fighting it?
00:44:35I've been thinking about you all day.
00:44:38Me too.
00:44:56So...
00:44:57I set the kitchen on fire?
00:45:02How am I supposed to know you're not supposed to light fireball shots on fire?
00:45:07It's not my fault.
00:45:08They should change the name.
00:45:09No wonder they cancelled Vanderpump's super yacht.
00:45:10If you think that's funny, just wait till the next episode.
00:45:11The captain gets super drunk off espresso martinis and he almost sinks the boat.
00:45:13You know...
00:45:27if you think that's funny just wait till the next episode the captain gets super drunk off
00:45:31espresso martinis and he almost sinks the boat you know when you're not acting like a complete
00:45:42douchebag you're not so bad thanks you know we could actually try this hey if the sex stays this
00:45:53good i'm hoping for anything i'm serious the wedding's coming up we could give it a shot
00:46:00you mean like you and me together together why not were you planning on marrying someone else
00:46:08oh gucci what's the rush
00:46:23oh hey royce jake how's it going good yeah look the other night was kind of crazy i know
00:46:40i should have told you about michelangelo we were kind of in a fight i'm sorry for bringing you into
00:46:47this is he always like that so aggressive and controlling i couldn't believe the way he just
00:46:54dragged you off like that he was like a caveman lugging home his woman well i am his woman
00:47:00he saw us together and he got jealous and i don't blame him oh my god am i actually sticking up for
00:47:08michelangelo dina volino i didn't mean to pry just wanted to make sure everything's okay
00:47:14i'm here if you need to talk thanks jake but i'm engaged remember and the only person i want to talk
00:47:23to is my fiance we had a connection you're a cat person it never would have worked
00:47:30come on gucci let's go
00:47:33cats are awesome
00:47:37that was a great presentation the marketing director loved your ideas for the new line
00:47:47you think so
00:47:48maybe i'm finally starting to get a hang of this ceo thing
00:47:52oh yeah yeah now listen i gotta fly to paris for a few days you mind watching uh your little brother
00:47:58for me gucci sure but i mean you know dogs are more amelia's specialty
00:48:03yeah but that's how you impress her you invite her for a romantic date
00:48:07at the dog park at the dog park mm-hmm i just texted her it's all set
00:48:13now go get a lover boy
00:48:17so you just throw it and he brings it back you've never played fetch before
00:48:32it's my dad's dog not mine let me try that's okay i know you don't want to touch a slobbery ball with
00:48:42your dainty hands
00:48:47do you ever get tired of the dog stuff no i like my work
00:48:53what's the point of working if you never get a chance to have fun
00:48:58you're right i should work less if nothing else
00:49:03you're letting me get closer to my little brother
00:49:08fetch gucci
00:49:13i've got a big surprise a surprise just wait and see
00:49:19what's that special delivery from masterione's italian deli
00:49:40but gucci it's your favorite prosciutto
00:49:47you know that's awful for dogs right i thought you were off the clock today besides a special occasion
00:49:57i also thought we could use his water bowl to pour a little chianti into it
00:50:02i'm kidding this is for us why don't you get us a corkscrew what else is in the back
00:50:08just some imported italian ingredients so i can make you a real italian dinner
00:50:13you can cook
00:50:28that was so good i feel like i just went to italy even though i've never been
00:50:33done
00:50:34how did you do this i can't cook at all
00:50:38making italian food is one of my favorite things to do
00:50:40did you learn in culinary school no my mom taught me
00:50:45tell me about her
00:50:47i never told a girl about my mom
00:50:50sorry i don't mean to pray
00:50:53she passed away when i was 11. breast cancer
00:50:57but i have a lot of good memories of her she grew up in a little village in tuscany and
00:51:05she taught me everything i know about cooking
00:51:07we'd spend hours in the kitchen just cooking and eating and laughing
00:51:11i still have all of her recipes here handwritten in italian that's really special
00:51:23i miss her this might sound corny but i feel a little closer to her when i make her recipes
00:51:31it's not corny but i didn't know you're such a softy
00:51:34just don't tell tmz what about your parents my parents died in a car accident when i was 13.
00:51:45it's been me and betsy ever since
00:51:47i'm sorry
00:51:49i just really hope these treatments work
00:51:54i don't want to lose her too
00:51:57i'm sorry your story made me emotional i'm gonna go do the dishes
00:52:02i'll help you no no it's fine i like doing the dishes it relaxes me
00:52:07good because i hate them well then i guess we make a good team
00:52:16is it just the wine or am i really falling for him her
00:52:31hey hey do you want an espresso i just figured out how to make the machine work
00:52:40no thank you me and dad have a morning meeting i'm kind of in a rush
00:52:43okay well don't forget gucci how could i
00:52:48ready bro well let me fix your tie
00:52:53what do you know about ties you wear t-shirts to work
00:52:57and you wore man thongs two weeks ago
00:53:00touche
00:53:02there you go okay bye bye
00:53:07love you love you too
00:53:09sorry it's reflex i didn't mean to say that
00:53:22me neither too soon
00:53:25talk about it later yeah
00:53:28okay okay
00:53:30ugh could that have been any more awkward
00:53:33and is michelangelo really in love with me
00:53:41look who's here hey my little guy
00:53:45hey little gucci
00:53:47look at this right here huh
00:53:50let's try it
00:53:53oh yeah now here's that here's mine
00:53:55right just like that huh yeah even got one for big brother right there
00:54:01there you go come to papa
00:54:04yes my boy
00:54:06all right all right so we got to talk about this uh this wedding right this is two weeks off
00:54:12hollywood bowl they're waiting for an answer and i bumped into chris martin on the plane he says the band
00:54:19is free you like cold play right dad you can't have the wedding at the hollywood
00:54:24oh
00:54:25well all right then we'll book uh the magic castle how about that not too big plenty room for cold
00:54:31play huh let's just pump the brakes we cannot plan a wedding like this
00:54:37what something wrong with amelia
00:54:40no everything is great it's better than great honestly but we cannot have a big flashy wedding that's
00:54:49our thing it's not amelia's thing i think it'd make it uncomfortable wow i never thought of that
00:54:59you know you have a very good point there
00:55:02i'm very impressed you've never acted like this with any other woman
00:55:07i can't say i've ever felt like this with another girl sounds like you might be falling in love
00:55:15love
00:55:17yeah i don't know
00:55:22all right all right change the deal gonna cancel the hollywood bowl all right and then we'll have a
00:55:28nice small intimate affair a wedding with cold play no cold play dad no cold play
00:55:43so it's about my cancer treatment it's not working i know it i talked to my doctors yesterday
00:55:52and i'm cured what you're cured oh congratulations thank you i wasn't expecting it i didn't think i
00:56:05would be cured in only two sessions it only took two sessions i almost had enough in my savings to cover that
00:56:13maybe i didn't need the dina volino's money what's wrong sis we should be celebrating i brought prosecco
00:56:21no yeah no i'm good yeah amelia i'm your sister you can tell me anything
00:56:31is it michelangelo is everything okay if that punk pretty boy hurts you i will take that man thong
00:56:39and give him a wedgie so far up his butt that it will cut him in two it's not michelangelo let's see
00:56:45it's me i have to tell you something
00:56:55i cannot believe that they convinced you to do an arranged marriage what is this game of thrones it's
00:57:03the only way that i could pay for your treatments and you know that i would do anything for you
00:57:07actually he's not that bad i kind of like him yeah babe that's called stockholm syndrome we need to get
00:57:19you out of there betsy i have real feelings for him but what about the tabloid stories you heard what he did
00:57:31to that floozy in disney world they banned him for life you'll never go to epcot he's not actually like
00:57:39the stories or at least not to me he's only acting like that to get into your pants amelia
00:57:47if you marry michelangelo he will make your life a living hell what if you meet him yeah meet him
00:57:58maybe he'll change your mind maybe maybe you'll actually like him don't count on it please me just
00:58:05give him a chance fine yes only one yes
00:58:13you won't regret it i'm gonna go get the prosecco
00:58:18you better bring the whole bottle
00:58:20thank you for making dinner of course i'm glad she's cancer free we need to celebrate
00:58:32michelangelo you know that betsy is the most important person in the world to me right you
00:58:38mean besides me i'm serious it's really important to me that you two get along
00:58:43have a glass of wine tonight's gonna be great
00:58:50it's enormous why would anybody need so much room it's nice to see you too sis
00:59:09nice to finally meet you let's see
00:59:11so this is the infamous uh michelangelo
00:59:22how about we start off with a glass of champagne 96 domperion amelia said that's the year that you
00:59:27were born yeah sorry i can't drink that fancy stuff it's worth more than my car why would anybody spend
00:59:34that much on that much on a drink
00:59:388.99 at ralph's it's delicious this was made in france sorry can't touch that stuff so who wants a drink
01:00:04you hardly touch your food it's a little too rich for me mine tastes great
01:00:21so michelangelo i have some big sister questions to ask about the prenuptials coming up you don't mind do
01:00:29you fire away so i know you two have been having your fun um but what's this relationship gonna look
01:00:40like once that honeymoon phase wears off i don't think it's going to
01:00:47that's cute and all but what about her career are you gonna support her or kids what's your stance on
01:00:53that or are you just gonna jump to the next person once you get bored and this gets too serious
01:00:58let's see look i know i have a past but i'm committed to it we haven't talked about kids but
01:01:07i'm open to anything see michelangelo that's my point you two are getting married and you barely know
01:01:13each other we know now easy betsy i just think it's a bad idea getting married this soon
01:01:22and if you really cared about amelia you would give her the time and what makes you such an expert
01:01:28i don't see a ring on your finger michelangelo you probably picked them apart the way you're doing
01:01:33me right now it's no wonder amelia was so uptight when i met her she gets it from you
01:01:38are you gonna let him talk to me like that amelia you started it
01:01:41why don't we all just calm down betsy's just looking out for my best interest no she's alone
01:01:54and miserable and trying to drag you down with her that's not fair michelangelo she's not been fair
01:01:59to me since she walked through the door you're the horniest bastard in beverly hills and you're
01:02:03a frigid lonely woman who cannot stand to see her sister happy you know what you can't talk to
01:02:07betsy like that that's my sister she just survived cancer
01:02:14that doesn't give her a right to insult me inside my own house this is my house too and she can say
01:02:18whatever she wants not to me you know maybe she should be concerned i don't like this side of you
01:02:23see i told you you should have spent more time getting to know each other but i guess the contract
01:02:27doesn't allow for that you told her she's my sister i don't care that violates our agreement
01:02:33oh is that all i am to you a contractual agreement some kind of obligation it's not what i meant it
01:02:39came out wrong amelia i love you you love me don't listen to him he doesn't even know what that means
01:02:47shut the fuck up you know what maybe she was right i shouldn't have signed that contract it's over
01:02:53we need to get out of here i've seen too many true crime documentaries on netflix to know what
01:03:05happens when you tell rich people secrets amelia i know this is hard to hear but you did the right
01:03:17thing you do so much better than him yeah but he isn't a monster i shouldn't have said that we can
01:03:26talk about it on the road get packing and if we leave now we can get to mexico by dawn lay low for a
01:03:32bit mexico or canada whatever it's that or stay here and get sued by the dino lovinos or worse
01:03:41i don't think romulus and michelangelo would sue us i mean i only told you about the contract it's
01:03:47not like i told the media you don't know that we're liabilities loose ends you should listen to
01:03:55more true kind podcast get rid of that thing they could be tracking us right now yeah you know
01:04:06michelangelo did manage to follow me to the echoplex the other night see he could have a sniper on us
01:04:17it's romulus hey romulus what what do you mean gucci's missing
01:04:37you came against my better judgment i'm not happy you've been blowing me off i've just been busy but
01:04:47it's over with now you should punish me for straying you make me sick i make me sick
01:04:57nice underwear it's a great craftsmanship
01:05:11okay let's get this over with
01:05:22is that all you have to say do you even realize how hot i am i'm sorry
01:05:27gentle i thought i wanted this but i don't i'm not the stud that i used to be
01:05:38amelia broke up with me
01:05:47it feels like she's stomping on my heart with one of your shoes
01:05:52never in a million years did i think i'd fall for a dog walk with my hair i am
01:05:56fucking devastated and all her wishes i could take back how i acted
01:06:01i just wanted to come back to me
01:06:03i don't want to go back to me
01:06:14i don't want to go back to me
01:06:16i don't want to go back to me
01:06:18gucci's gone
01:06:31oh well i i only had him off the leash for a second you know we're practically in the house and
01:06:38there all of a sudden he just shot off like a rocket
01:06:42i've been calling him all night but he won't come back
01:06:44well we can help you find him yeah right
01:06:51good thanks good gucci this better not be a trap just come on
01:06:59gucci gucci hey hey where's becalangelo huh i thought you're both together why isn't he here with
01:07:06you oh um he's sorry i'm late dad where were you i had to stop for late night delivery
01:07:14mastriani's it's gucci's favorite prosciutto this doesn't ring out of hiding nothing will
01:07:21smart move dude here ladies take a piece of this prosciutto here that's it
01:07:29amelia
01:07:41gucci
01:07:44who's hopeless we've been looking for him all night long we're never gonna find him
01:07:55don't give up dad he's just off having a little adventure keep looking he'll turn up in a few minutes
01:07:59see they're not gonna kill us i do have to admit though i didn't expect to see this side of him
01:08:09he's really there for his dad
01:08:10his dad his dad's dog so you approve now they didn't say that
01:08:19gucci
01:08:20gucci
01:08:20gucci my boy's back
01:08:33okay okay i'm a little closer to approving
01:08:38i might have possibly
01:08:49misjudged you
01:08:50i don't know what's going to happen to you a little
01:08:54it's okay most of what the tabloids publish is true they just leave out part of the story
01:09:00amelia can we talk
01:09:02amelia can we talk
01:09:12amelia can we talk
01:09:14i'm sorry about earlier tonight
01:09:28i shouldn't have attacked your sister and i shouldn't have blown up at you for mentioning the contract
01:09:34I hope that you know you mean so much more to me than just a business agreement
01:09:42Thanks for saying that
01:09:45I needed to hear that
01:09:48And I'm sorry for calling you a monster
01:09:52You're not one
01:09:54I'm still learning new things about you
01:09:57Most of them are good
01:10:01I'm happy we signed the contract
01:10:03I'm not
01:10:05You're not? What do you mean?
01:10:12Amelia, this might sound crazy, but
01:10:15I meant it when I said that I love you
01:10:18And I don't want some silly piece of paper to be the reason that we stay together
01:10:23I want to know that our love is real
01:10:27Dad
01:10:30What is this on?
01:10:31I want to cancel the contract between me and Amelia
01:10:35Why, son?
01:10:38Because I want to ask her to marry me
01:10:40And not because of some legal obligation
01:10:45But because she wants to
01:10:49Consider our contracts Null and Boyd
01:10:56Amelia
01:11:03What will it be?
01:11:06Will you marry me?
01:11:11Will you marry me?
01:11:13Yes
01:11:16I'll marry you
01:11:18You've made me the happiest underwear model in the world
01:11:35And I'm the happiest dog walker
01:11:38Look at me
01:11:39Look at me
01:11:40I'm dripping like a Roman aqueduct
01:11:42All right, all right, you two
01:11:46That's enough, all right?
01:11:48We spent this whole night together
01:11:49Come over to my place, all right?
01:11:52We'll have a nice breakfast
01:11:53Italian style, huh?
01:11:55Hopefully it's not too rich for you
01:11:57I think I can get used to it
01:12:00And then we can all discuss the wedding, all right?
01:12:03I want to hear from everybody involved
01:12:05Especially Coldplay
01:12:07We're not getting Coldplay, Dad
01:12:09It was worth a try
01:12:11And now the bride and groom would like to give their vows
01:12:38Michelangelo
01:12:39Amelia
01:12:43Even though we're far from a perfect couple
01:12:48We're perfect together
01:12:50I've learned so much from you in such a short amount of time
01:12:55And not just about dogs
01:12:57I don't know how I ever managed anything without you
01:13:02I'm looking forward to your support and counsel
01:13:10As I take over the family business from my father this year
01:13:13And in return, I promise to be patient and a loving husband
01:13:21As you turn our backyard into the doggy daycare you've always dreamed of
01:13:25I don't
01:13:26I don't
01:13:27I don't
01:13:28I don't
01:13:29I don't
01:13:30I don't
01:13:31I don't
01:13:32I don't
01:13:33I don't
01:13:34I don't
01:13:37I don't
01:13:38I don't
01:13:40I don't
01:13:41I never thought I would end up with a former man-thong model, but here we are.
01:13:51Michelangelo, you've helped me come out of my shell, and you've taught me how to live
01:13:54life to the fullest, something I hope to do more of on our honeymoon in Italy.
01:14:03And although we haven't spent much time together, it feels like a lifetime, in a good way.
01:14:09I know your mom would be proud of you.
01:14:12Te amo, Michelangelo.
01:14:13I love you.
01:14:14With the power vested in me by Almighty God and the city of Beverly Hills, I now pronounce
01:14:20you husband and wife.
01:14:22You may kiss your bride.
01:14:32Thanks.
01:14:34I'm Betsy, Amelia's sister.
01:14:37I'm Jake.
01:14:37Another dog walker.
01:14:40It's crazy, you know, given my sister, but I've always been more of a cat person.
01:14:46Me too!
01:14:47Woo!
01:14:48Woo-hoo-hoo!
01:14:49Oh, crap.
01:14:55Woo-hoo!
01:14:57Woo-hoo!
01:14:58Woo-hoo!
01:14:59Woo-hoo!
01:15:00Woo-hoo!
01:15:01Woo-hoo!
01:15:02Woo-hoo!
01:15:03Woo-hoo!
01:15:04Woo-hoo!
01:15:05Woo-hoo!
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