- 7 hours ago
Category
🎥
Short filmTranscript
00:00:00All the corner office, top floor.
00:00:04Mm-hmm, the penthouse suite.
00:00:05Welcome to the new Alpern home.
00:00:08This is our foyer, sort of, foyer number three.
00:00:13Fireplace, beautiful view of downtown.
00:00:16Did you sketch, did you get that?
00:00:18Good.
00:00:24You thought of everything.
00:00:25I did, candles.
00:00:26Jennifer Alpern, you were such a romantic.
00:00:29Jennifer, I just measured it.
00:00:30We totally have room for a billiard table.
00:00:32Oh, no, no, no, no.
00:00:33Come on!
00:00:34No!
00:00:35First of all, I am a pool shark.
00:00:37You know I will kill you.
00:00:38You're a pool shark, but you don't play billiards.
00:00:39I can't believe you found that.
00:00:41I put it in the garage in a tiny box in the corner.
00:00:44Oh, it was cold.
00:00:45Honey, you've had that sweater since college.
00:00:48It's gross.
00:00:48It has holes in it.
00:00:49It smells like gold beard.
00:00:52Come on, this is quality.
00:00:53Kevin, if you take off that sweater,
00:00:55I will make love to you in every room in this house.
00:01:00Starting right here.
00:01:03That's so itching.
00:01:05Turn to your left 90 degrees.
00:01:08Open your eyes.
00:01:11What is this?
00:01:11What do you think?
00:01:13What is it?
00:01:14Kiss me.
00:01:15Hi, I'm Jennifer Alpern.
00:01:22And I'm Kevin Alpern.
00:01:24And if you're watching this, then we're not here anymore.
00:01:27That sounds really dramatic.
00:01:28I'm going to try it again.
00:01:30Hi, I'm Jennifer.
00:01:31This is Kevin, and we're here to tell you
00:01:33how we spent the last four months of our lives.
00:01:35You probably already know this,
00:01:37but we both lost our jobs about a year or so ago.
00:01:39Yeah, and things went downhill really fast.
00:01:42And then Jennifer had this brilliant idea.
00:01:43Yeah, if we're going downhill anyway,
00:01:46why not be the masters of our own fate
00:01:47and decide when and how we're going to go under?
00:01:50We have about $29,000 left in credit card lines to spend.
00:01:55Spend what we want when we want.
00:01:57Yeah, do all the things that we wanted to do,
00:01:59but now due to the circumstances, can't do.
00:02:03So here we are kind of documenting our adventures for you.
00:02:07Do you have anything else to say?
00:02:09Nope.
00:02:10I do miss everyone.
00:02:12Just know that we had a really great time
00:02:15these last few months.
00:02:16Yeah.
00:02:16Oh, and I love you, sis.
00:02:20I know we haven't talked in a long time,
00:02:22but I just want you to know
00:02:24I thought about you every day.
00:02:28I should probably shut it off now.
00:02:30You come clean
00:02:43And cause a scene
00:02:47My diary writes
00:02:51It's all lies
00:02:55It's all lies
00:03:00Oh, and I love you, sis.
00:03:01Who do you think you are?
00:03:28Lighting this place with dark
00:03:33My time is meant for play
00:03:37You have a better way
00:03:45That bad, huh?
00:03:47Can you say hell?
00:03:49I don't even see what the point is. Hundreds of us, hundreds crammed into this little room and the looks on everyone's faces just said it all.
00:03:57Take me. I'll be your slave. I'll work for next to nothing. Pathetic.
00:04:01You'll get it. I can feel it.
00:04:03No, I won't. I didn't pass my CPI.
00:04:06Your what?
00:04:08Critical personality inventory exam.
00:04:11It's an exam they invented to test whether your corporate policy gels with you or your personality gels with them.
00:04:18They test your big five. Your conscientiousness, your stability, your openness, your agreeableness, your extroversion.
00:04:25Brian's always in trouble. He thinks his new girlfriend of two months is pregnant.
00:04:32What would Brian do without your advice?
00:04:34I am his best friend.
00:04:35It seems like you're his only friend.
00:04:36It's kind of my duty to be there for him. He's going through a tough time.
00:04:39Hello. Well, you're a good guy, Kevin. You know, if you shut off your cell phone, we could save 60 a month.
00:04:47Never. I'm my last link to my old life when I was a mover and shaker.
00:04:51Oh, old habits die hard.
00:04:54So what's for dinner?
00:05:03Boston baked beans.
00:05:06Oh, good. I like beans. Not the more nutritious than beans. They're loaded with protein.
00:05:12Oh, I have a surprise.
00:05:13Do we win the lotto? Jackpot's up to 62.5 million.
00:05:16No, close. I just got my last unemployment check.
00:05:19Oh, good. Time to cut loose and celebrate.
00:05:22No, it's time to make the money last.
00:05:24There's always food stamps. Or the place we donated the turkey.
00:05:28The food bank.
00:05:29Yeah. Or maybe we'll get jobs.
00:05:31I sent my resume to over 100 companies. Something's got to give.
00:05:34Maybe we should just go to the store.
00:05:36No, let's order takeout.
00:05:37No. Pizza. Pizza. Pizza. Pizza.
00:05:39No, we can't. Kevin, that's like over $20 plus a tip. No.
00:05:42We can just get cheese. I can live without toppings, without pepperoni, not mushrooms.
00:05:47Mushrooms are a line in the sand. That's non-negotiable.
00:05:49Kevin, we only have $591.62 to last us an infinite amount of time.
00:05:53We're not getting takeout. We're not going out to eat.
00:05:59Oh, and there was a 50 cent off pack of 12 pack of tuna?
00:06:03Done. I swore in college I would never eat ramen again.
00:06:07I worked hard enough. I need the good stuff.
00:06:09Is there a reason why you torture us?
00:06:11How's that?
00:06:12You go on and on about how things used to be. It's getting old.
00:06:16I'm sorry. I'm remembering a better period in our lives.
00:06:19Oh, you're complaining.
00:06:20You know, what you're called complaining is my way of remembering better times.
00:06:24Yeah, I'm not having this conversation again.
00:06:29Oh, Brian again.
00:06:31What would he do without your brotherly advice?
00:06:34I have no idea.
00:06:35Hey, remember our old market where we used to have our choice of cheeses?
00:06:48Like, goat.
00:06:49And not just goat.
00:06:50Kembaire, Rockford.
00:06:52And you could choose what country it came from.
00:06:54And then the region from that country.
00:06:56You done?
00:06:57Sorry, I won't reminisce anymore. I'm bad.
00:07:00Hi, Mom.
00:07:01Hi, dear. How are the two of you doing?
00:07:03You're doing okay.
00:07:04How's Kevin's job hunt progressing?
00:07:06I don't know. Let me ask him.
00:07:08My mom wants to know how the job hunt's coming.
00:07:10Tell him.
00:07:11I hope he's given up.
00:07:12Tell him winners win.
00:07:14My mom says don't give up. Winners win.
00:07:16I bet she does.
00:07:18I love you, Mom.
00:07:19Yeah, Mom. He's looking every day.
00:07:22We both are.
00:07:23It's just hard. No one's hiring right now.
00:07:26He needs to pound the pavement.
00:07:28Mom, he is.
00:07:29Are you both coming home for Thanksgiving?
00:07:31Yes, we are coming home for Thanksgiving.
00:07:33I just don't see why someone won't hire him.
00:07:36He's such a smart boy.
00:07:38Such a talented architect.
00:07:41Mom, can I call you back?
00:07:43Okay.
00:07:46You're silly.
00:07:47Isn't that why you married me?
00:07:49Maybe.
00:07:51You made a mess.
00:07:52I know. We better go before they make us pay for it.
00:07:54No. What is that, anyway?
00:07:55It's gelatin.
00:07:56It's Mexican gelatin.
00:07:57It's...
00:07:58It's jalapeno gelatin with queso.
00:08:00What else do we need?
00:08:01I don't know.
00:08:02I got the peanut butter and the beans.
00:08:04You ready?
00:08:07Tuna, good call.
00:08:08You were so honored.
00:08:10Your favorite.
00:08:11Cilantro.
00:08:16It's like knives.
00:08:17I love cilantro.
00:08:18I know.
00:08:19And it makes me worry about you.
00:08:21And maybe you are an android.
00:08:23And maybe you are an android.
00:08:24We had tears.
00:08:27Like streams they run.
00:08:29Don't let sadness stalk in the fun.
00:08:34Why can't you?
00:08:38Let me go.
00:08:43Honest love.
00:08:44Don't last at all.
00:08:45Honest love.
00:08:46Don't last at all.
00:08:47Honest love.
00:08:48Just makes me crawl.
00:08:49Honest love.
00:08:50Just makes me crawl.
00:08:51Honest love.
00:08:52Makes me go out, out, out, out of my mind.
00:08:53You growing a beard?
00:08:54My new plan is to shave every four days.
00:08:57That way we can save on razors and shaving cream.
00:08:59Mm-hmm.
00:09:00Do you know that each of those razors is like $2?
00:09:01I never realized we had a roof off of this.
00:09:02Yep.
00:09:03Well, I think it's sexy.
00:09:04You growing a beard?
00:09:06My new plan is to shave every four days.
00:09:09That way we can save on razors and shaving cream.
00:09:11Mm-hmm.
00:09:12Do you know that each of those razors is, like, $2?
00:09:15I never realized what a rip-off was.
00:09:16Yep.
00:09:18Well, I think it's sexy.
00:09:29Do you still love me?
00:09:31Of course I do.
00:09:34Then say it.
00:09:37I don't have to say it. I've never said it.
00:09:42Would I still be with you if I didn't love you?
00:09:44What choice would you have?
00:09:46I could move out.
00:09:47And go where?
00:09:50I don't know. The car?
00:09:51That's my point.
00:09:55I feel like we're together because we have to be together,
00:09:57not because we want to be together.
00:09:59Hey, even where we had everything, I was still with you.
00:10:03Then say it.
00:10:06Look, you know, I don't say it. I just show it.
00:10:09My mother always told my father she loved him.
00:10:12And then they got divorced, and then he married Marilyn, his trophy wife,
00:10:15and it didn't matter they said it.
00:10:17Well, if it means absolutely nothing, then just say it.
00:10:20Why are we having this conversation now? We're married.
00:10:23Because it's important now, okay?
00:10:26I just...
00:10:28need it.
00:10:30I love you, alright?
00:10:33Yeah.
00:10:39Yeah.
00:10:40Amazing.
00:10:41Well, that guy can interrupt every moment we have.
00:10:53It's like he has relationship sabotage...
00:10:59You know what? It's a nice day. I'm gonna walk home.
00:11:01Are you mad at me?
00:11:13No, I'm not mad. Just sad, I guess.
00:11:17Don't you think I'm sad, too?
00:11:19Not for the same reasons.
00:11:26I miss driving our car.
00:11:28I thought we weren't allowed to get nostalgic when it says back.
00:11:32I'm allowed to be a little misty once in a while.
00:11:38I kinda like it.
00:11:40I mean, we used to drive everywhere, we never got to see anything.
00:11:43It really opens your eyes, though.
00:11:45Yeah.
00:11:46I don't know if I wanna see everything.
00:11:49I like living my own ignorant little world.
00:12:02I'm excited for sandwiches.
00:12:05Do you have the keys?
00:12:14You always were a terrific chef.
00:12:16Well, you're sweet.
00:12:18And a bad liar.
00:12:21Huh?
00:12:23I thought we were saving that for a special occasion.
00:12:25Well, we were.
00:12:27We might be waiting a long time, so...
00:12:31What are we toasting to?
00:12:34I don't know.
00:12:38Let's try something.
00:12:40During this entire meal, no one can say anything negative.
00:12:42This is going to be a happy, pleasant meal.
00:12:45Done.
00:12:47And if whoever talks negatively loses and has the dishes for a week.
00:12:51What do I make it, two weeks?
00:12:53Three weeks.
00:12:55A month.
00:12:56Till spring.
00:12:58Works for me.
00:13:00You know, Kevin, I was thinking.
00:13:02This meal out would have cost us $32 at least.
00:13:05Not to mention the drinks, which would have been at least $10.
00:13:08Yeah, so that's like $42 with tax intent, maybe even $45.
00:13:11And for what?
00:13:14Bread that costs $0.10 a slice.
00:13:16I mean, an $0.89 can of tuna.
00:13:18Two cents worth of mayo.
00:13:20That's like $0.50 a sandwich.
00:13:22That's over a $32 savings.
00:13:24And I love tuna.
00:13:26Add a little mayo, relish, celery.
00:13:28It's a foodie's paradise.
00:13:29I mean, where would we be without peanut butter and tuna fish?
00:13:33Empires were built on these stables.
00:13:35You lose.
00:13:37How's that?
00:13:38You were complaining.
00:13:40Oh, I would like to repeal this ruling.
00:13:42Do you like sex?
00:13:44Oh, that's not fair.
00:13:45You can't use sex as a bargaining chip.
00:13:47Oh?
00:13:49Okay, maybe you can, but that's just not fair.
00:13:52Okay.
00:13:54Maybe I'll consider reducing your sentence to one week if you work for it.
00:14:00Tell me you love me.
00:14:03Oh, we're back on that again.
00:14:06What if we're not on it?
00:14:08Well, then I only have one question for you.
00:14:11Which type of dishwashing soap do you prefer?
00:14:14Make sure you wash those really good with some grease and some love.
00:14:18Oh.
00:14:28Is it Brian?
00:14:29Hey, hey, hey.
00:14:30I can text him.
00:14:31Come on.
00:14:32You are a troublemaker.
00:14:34Looks like he's off the hook.
00:14:35Hillary doesn't have a bun in the oven.
00:14:37She dumped him.
00:14:38Great.
00:14:39I'm so happy for him.
00:14:41I won two tickets to Paris.
00:14:44You mean virtual tickets?
00:14:46My sorority nominated me to go, and I got a new pet.
00:14:49Her name is Tattles.
00:14:51She's coming with me.
00:14:53Hmm. Is this your way of saying you want a cat?
00:14:55Oh, I'm going to the south of France with my new boyfriend, Henri.
00:15:00Can I come too?
00:15:02Dumb question, Jen.
00:15:04What joy do you get in going to places that aren't real?
00:15:07The south of France is very real.
00:15:10Not to us.
00:15:13Not having this conversation.
00:15:14You never want to talk about it.
00:15:19Talk about what exactly?
00:15:21Our situation.
00:15:23Look, I was just reading in psychology.com, if you talk about your problems and get them out in the open, you're more apt to be a happier, healthier person than holding it inside.
00:15:32And that it's important for couples to have tough conversations, even if it causes friction between those you love.
00:15:38Do you really believe any of that BS?
00:15:41I mean, the individual who wrote that is obviously under some deadline to generate content so he doesn't lose his job and the life he worked so hard for and end up like us.
00:15:49Well, that's exactly my point.
00:15:52We're holding on to all this anger and it's making us depressed.
00:15:55Holding things inside is not what's making me depressed.
00:16:00It's living like this that's making me depressed.
00:16:03It's...
00:16:05Well, we lost our house and we can't even get jobs and I don't even think we could get arrested if we wanted to.
00:16:09Oh, I could get arrested. That wouldn't be tough.
00:16:13See what I'm saying? You said you want to have a serious conversation and you're just making jokes.
00:16:17Well, what am I supposed to do?
00:16:18Talk about it.
00:16:19Maybe making jokes is my way of venting.
00:16:22I think if I were to admit that our lives are going downhill, I wouldn't be able to cope.
00:16:26And now you're being defensive.
00:16:27I'm not being defensive and I do want to talk about it.
00:16:31No, you don't want to talk about it because if you did want to talk about it, we'd talk about it.
00:16:36Okay, so talk about it. Now.
00:16:40I can't just do it on command.
00:16:44Yeah.
00:16:46Where are you going?
00:16:49Out.
00:16:51Hey, where is out exactly?
00:16:55Jen, you're really going?
00:17:07You're going to try being on the house now.
00:17:25So, let me know.
00:17:27You're really learning.
00:17:29You're muchos.
00:17:31You're always a happy man.
00:17:33Anything you listen to be saying that?
00:17:34You're not going to jump, are you?
00:17:44I miss all the fun we've been having.
00:17:49I was thinking about it.
00:17:54Can we go together?
00:17:56Like a suicide pact?
00:17:59Well, I wouldn't want to live without you.
00:18:03You'd get over me.
00:18:05Wanna bet?
00:18:09I guess there's only one way to find out.
00:18:15I think we'd die on impact or in the air.
00:18:17We're not high enough to die midair.
00:18:19It would be on the splat.
00:18:21The splat?
00:18:22Yeah, when we hit the concrete.
00:18:24Is that like an official term?
00:18:26No, I need it up.
00:18:31That would be gross.
00:18:32Yeah, bloody.
00:18:37Body parts.
00:18:39Everywhere.
00:18:40Besides, I want an open casket.
00:18:43If we end up, we're going to have to do it some other way.
00:18:45Sleeping pills.
00:18:47Not effective.
00:18:49You always hear about people ending up in comas.
00:18:53Gunshot to the temple.
00:18:55To the temple or the mouth?
00:18:58Because you might survive and then you're just a glorified vegetable.
00:19:01I want chips and salsa.
00:19:15That we can manage.
00:19:26What would happen if you lived and I died?
00:19:29Or the other way around.
00:19:32If we go, we should make sure to go together.
00:19:36Deal.
00:19:36No.
00:19:36No.
00:19:57No.
00:19:58No.
00:21:33We're going to do everything that we wanted to do.
00:21:36We're going to eat when we want to eat.
00:21:37We're going to do what we want to do.
00:21:38Live high on the hog, no holds barred.
00:21:40Sounds great.
00:21:42Did we win the lottery?
00:21:43Not exactly.
00:21:45Okay, listen.
00:21:46We have $29,000 left on our cards.
00:21:50We're going to spend it.
00:21:52We're going to do all the things we want to do, live the life we were supposed to live before
00:21:55this crap happened to us and we ended up here.
00:21:57We're just going to enjoy ourselves.
00:21:59Okay.
00:22:00I thought that we were saving the credit though for when we actually ran out of money
00:22:03and needed to live.
00:22:05We were.
00:22:06But I made one small adjustment to the model.
00:22:10The original plan would have only delayed the inevitable.
00:22:12I mean, those cards would have bought us eight months, ten months tops.
00:22:15And I'm being generous.
00:22:15I won't argue with you.
00:22:16You're our financial guru.
00:22:18So how do you pay it back?
00:22:21We don't.
00:22:23I'm confused.
00:22:25We're not going to pay it back because we don't have to.
00:22:28I'm missing something.
00:22:29It's not like they're going to give us free money.
00:22:31Actually, they kind of are.
00:22:33Just hear me out, okay?
00:22:35Do you just, do you like your life the way it is now?
00:22:38No, but...
00:22:39Do you think it's going to get better?
00:22:40I don't know.
00:22:40It's not.
00:22:42It won't.
00:22:42I ran the numbers, okay?
00:22:43We're not going to be out of debt until we're, like, over 55.
00:22:46And that's if we can find work.
00:22:47And that's the best-case scenario.
00:22:49Don't ask me about the worst.
00:23:11There's no emotion in this, Kevin.
00:23:13It's all facts.
00:23:16This could be the only chance we have at the life we wanted for ourselves.
00:23:20Are you serious?
00:23:22Yes, I'm serious.
00:23:24I've never been more serious in my life.
00:23:26This is crazy.
00:23:28What's crazier?
00:23:30Living a wonderful six months with the person you love?
00:23:32Or living a lifetime of toil and fear and...
00:23:36I know what I'm voting for.
00:23:42Maybe we should think about this a little bit more.
00:23:43I don't need to think about it anymore.
00:23:46I've been thinking about it for months.
00:23:50So you're just going to go ahead and do it, whether I'm in or not?
00:23:54I'm just telling you what I want for myself.
00:23:57Maybe you should go see a therapist.
00:23:58I don't need a therapist, Kevin.
00:24:03A therapist isn't going to help our financial situation.
00:24:06And it's easy for the doctor to say,
00:24:08Do be content because he is going to go home
00:24:10to his beautiful suburban home with his white picket fence,
00:24:12which our health insurance helps pay for, by the way.
00:24:14And that's up at the end of the month.
00:24:18So that's great.
00:24:21I just think there has to be a better way.
00:24:24You know, I'm miserable too.
00:24:26I hate what we're experiencing, but I just...
00:24:28I think there has to be some hope.
00:24:33Hope is just a word that people use
00:24:35so they don't have to deal with the cold, hard facts of the situation.
00:24:40Kevin, I...
00:24:40It's a logical decision.
00:24:46I can't, Jennifer.
00:24:50Fine.
00:24:51Great.
00:24:52Then I'll leave you with half the credit cards, okay?
00:24:54You'll have a little less than four months left.
00:24:57Now where are you going?
00:24:58Out!
00:25:10I'll be right back.
00:25:30Bye.
00:25:32Bye.
00:25:33Bye.
00:25:34Bye.
00:25:35Bye.
00:25:35Bye.
00:25:36Bye.
00:25:38Bye.
00:25:40How'd I know I could find you here?
00:25:44I splurged.
00:25:45Caramel macchiato, 375.
00:25:49Sometimes you gotta live.
00:25:57Can we go to Vegas?
00:26:00We always had a blast there.
00:26:03Does this mean you want to end it with me?
00:26:08I don't know.
00:26:10What don't you know?
00:26:14I don't want to live the life that we planned without you.
00:26:19I'd rather have six months with you than spend a lifetime wondering what those last six months would have been like.
00:26:26I love you.
00:26:29Even though we're gonna off each other.
00:26:32That's something that's really weird.
00:26:35How are we gonna do it, anyway?
00:26:37Like, who goes first?
00:26:38Uh, we'll figure that out later.
00:26:42Yeah, just a minor detail, huh?
00:26:43So we're gonna keep a video log of what we're planning to do, so our friends and family don't think we decided to do this randomly.
00:26:58I love how you've it all figured out.
00:27:00Just doing what makes sense.
00:27:02It's logical.
00:27:03Funny what seems logical today.
00:27:06Yeah.
00:27:09Come on.
00:27:12Is it on?
00:27:14How do I know?
00:27:15The red light needs to be flashing.
00:27:16And we're recording.
00:27:18Okay.
00:27:20Hi, I'm Jennifer Alpern.
00:27:22And I'm Kevin Alpern.
00:27:24And if you're watching this, then we're not here anymore.
00:27:28That sounds dramatic.
00:27:30Um, I'm not doing it again.
00:27:31Hi, I'm Jennifer.
00:27:32This is Kevin, and we're here to tell you how we spent the last four months of our lives.
00:27:37Uh, you probably already know this, but we both lost our jobs about a year or so ago.
00:27:41Yeah, and things went downhill really fast.
00:27:43But then Jennifer had this brilliant idea.
00:27:45Yeah.
00:27:46If we're going downhill anyway, why not be the masters of our fate and decide when and how we go under?
00:27:51We have about $29,000 left in credit card lines to spend.
00:27:55Spend what we want, when we want.
00:27:57Yeah.
00:27:57Do all the things we wanted to do, but now, given the circumstances, won't get a chance to.
00:28:02So, here we are, kind of documenting our adventures for you.
00:28:05Do you have anything else to say?
00:28:07No.
00:28:09Um, I do miss everyone.
00:28:12Just know that we had a really great time these last few months.
00:28:14Yeah.
00:28:15Oh, and I love you, sis.
00:28:18I know we haven't talked in a while, but I just want you to know I thought about you every day.
00:28:27We should probably shut it off now.
00:28:35So, now that we are free, we should have to figure out what to do.
00:28:45Uh-huh.
00:28:46South of France.
00:28:48Yes.
00:28:49You just want to see the topless beaches again.
00:28:51No, I appreciate French art.
00:28:53Uh-huh, right.
00:28:55Oh, your turn then.
00:28:56Africa.
00:28:58I've always wanted to see the lion in its natural habitat.
00:29:00Yeah, you have big bugs there.
00:29:01That's not high on my list.
00:29:02Come on.
00:29:04Horse-drawn carriage ride from New York City?
00:29:06That's touristy.
00:29:07Oh, and going on safari isn't.
00:29:09Come on.
00:29:09African safari qualifies as exotic.
00:29:11Uh-huh.
00:29:12Carriage ride is generic.
00:29:14All right, Mr. Travel Guide.
00:29:15What is the ultimate experience you can think of doing that we haven't thought of yet?
00:29:19I want to stay on the space station.
00:29:20Yeah, it's a little bit out of our budget.
00:29:23Just a little bit.
00:29:24Okay.
00:29:25Uh, Dodger tickets.
00:29:27Box seats.
00:29:28Yeah, we can do that.
00:29:32Caribbean.
00:29:33British Virgin Islands.
00:29:35I want to walk on the white sand.
00:29:37And I just want to feel the sand in my hands and you and the sun.
00:29:42And just relax.
00:29:46I want to drive fast.
00:29:48Okay.
00:29:49Remember that Formula One racing school we talked about?
00:29:52We can both race Porsches on the track.
00:29:54Yeah.
00:29:54Yeah, I would do that.
00:29:55I would totally do that.
00:29:57I would do that.
00:29:57I thought you were afraid of high speeds.
00:29:58Well, what's the worst that could happen?
00:30:01Okay, fair enough.
00:30:03Maybe we make that one of the last things we do?
00:30:05Just in case it doesn't, you know?
00:30:06Yeah, right.
00:30:07Go as planned.
00:30:09Yeah.
00:30:11I want to go on a hot air balloon ride.
00:30:14And drink really expensive champagne.
00:30:16Like, ridiculously expensive.
00:30:18Sounds fantastic.
00:30:19Yeah.
00:30:20Dangled grapes in each other's mouths.
00:30:23Yeah, sure.
00:30:25It's an image I've always wanted to make happen.
00:30:28Hmm.
00:30:29We're really going to do this, you know.
00:30:31I'm ready.
00:30:33Are you?
00:30:33Mm-hmm.
00:30:33Mm-hmm.
00:30:34Mm-hmm.
00:30:35Mm-hmm.
00:30:36Mm-hmm.
00:30:36Mm-hmm.
00:30:37Mm-hmm.
00:30:38Mm-hmm.
00:30:38Mm-hmm.
00:30:38Mm-hmm.
00:30:38Mm-hmm.
00:30:39Mm-hmm.
00:30:39Mm-hmm.
00:30:39Mm-hmm.
00:30:39Mm-hmm.
00:30:39Mm-hmm.
00:30:40Mm-hmm.
00:30:40Mm-hmm.
00:30:40Mm-hmm.
00:30:41Mm-hmm.
00:30:41Mm-hmm.
00:30:41Mm-hmm.
00:30:42Mm-hmm.
00:30:42Mm-hmm.
00:30:42Mm-hmm.
00:30:43Mm-hmm.
00:30:43Mm-hmm.
00:30:43Mm-hmm.
00:30:44Mm-hmm.
00:30:44Mm-hmm.
00:30:45Mm-hmm.
00:30:45Mm-hmm.
00:30:46Mm-hmm.
00:30:46Mm-hmm.
00:30:46Mm-hmm.
00:30:47Mm-hmm.
00:30:47Mm-hmm.
00:30:47Mm-hmm.
00:31:03I feel kind of free.
00:31:33Is that strange?
00:31:34No.
00:31:35No.
00:31:36It's a relief kind of to know we can do whatever we want.
00:31:38Mm-hmm.
00:31:39You know?
00:31:40Play and make up the rules.
00:31:41We need rules.
00:31:42Good point.
00:31:48And you give your whole life thinking that you need to work and make a living.
00:31:52Yeah.
00:31:53Yeah.
00:31:54Yeah.
00:31:55And then there's some big payoff at the end of the golden year's retirement.
00:31:58It just doesn't work like that.
00:32:00What's the one thing you would have done if you didn't think it was a responsible thing
00:32:06to do?
00:32:07It's been so long since I've done anything irresponsible.
00:32:10I don't know.
00:32:11Well, what are you feeling right now?
00:32:14I want to stay in an outrageously expensive hotel on the beach.
00:32:20The kind of place you have to take it alone to pay the bill.
00:32:22Yeah.
00:32:23Yeah.
00:32:24The place where they put the little chocolates on the pillows.
00:32:25Mm-hmm.
00:32:26And all the toiletries you could ever need in the bathroom.
00:32:27Mm-hmm.
00:32:28Yes.
00:32:29The fuzzy bathrooms.
00:32:30And order room service.
00:32:31Everything on the menu.
00:32:32Yes.
00:32:33Yes.
00:32:34It's been really expensive.
00:32:35And eat everything in the little fridge.
00:32:36Yes.
00:32:37Yes.
00:32:38And not care how much it costs.
00:32:39I don't want to see you in that expensive hotel for the next week.
00:32:43Okay.
00:32:44You do know about that.
00:32:59Don't forget to bring your swimming trucks, because we need us.
00:33:02Mm.
00:33:03I'm thinking we'd take that pool naked.
00:33:06I'm sure their curiosity won't go any further than that.
00:33:09Exactly.
00:33:10Exactly.
00:33:11Why don't we have everything in life?
00:33:12Oh, I cannot wait to eat at the restaurant there.
00:33:14Are you hungry?
00:33:15Five stars.
00:33:16Pretty hungry.
00:33:17I'll be really hungry by the time we get there.
00:33:18Hey.
00:33:19What?
00:33:20Let's have you wear your A's hat today.
00:33:21I don't like the A's.
00:33:22You do, too.
00:33:23I hate the A's.
00:33:25Everyone loves the A's.
00:33:26I really hate them, actually.
00:33:27You can wear them.
00:33:28Um, can I please bring my linen pants?
00:33:31You have to bring linen pants.
00:33:32We're pretending it's summer.
00:33:33Oh, my gosh.
00:33:34This is gonna be awesome.
00:33:35And my white shoes.
00:33:36Your seersucker pants.
00:33:37Buckled...
00:33:38Yeah.
00:33:39I don't know where those are.
00:33:40I think we may have gotten rid of those.
00:33:41I'm ready.
00:33:42I'm in a fruity drink mood.
00:33:43You know?
00:33:44Yeah.
00:33:53You okay?
00:33:54Yeah.
00:33:55You don't need too much food.
00:33:56Let's go.
00:33:57Pool time.
00:33:58Let's do it.
00:33:59A little pool party?
00:34:00Actually, I think it was over there.
00:34:01I'm gonna kinda miss it.
00:34:02Even if it's going for a little while.
00:34:04The roaches?
00:34:05The strange clanging noise at two in the morning?
00:34:07Well, don't forget our landlady, Ms. Volker.
00:34:09She had the demeanor of a prison warden.
00:34:11Yeah, I know.
00:34:14Let's not wait around here.
00:34:16Let's get out of here.
00:34:19I have a five-star restaurant here.
00:34:20Oh, yeah?
00:34:21Yes.
00:34:22Would you like to eat there?
00:34:23I would.
00:34:24All right.
00:34:25Immediately?
00:34:26Or do you?
00:34:27Immediately?
00:34:28We can check in.
00:34:29Can we check in?
00:34:30Yeah.
00:34:35We're home.
00:34:39It's gonna be good.
00:34:40Not bad.
00:34:50Cheers.
00:34:51Cheers.
00:34:55Mmm.
00:34:58Mmm.
00:35:02So, Kevin, how are you feeling right now?
00:35:05I like being on vacation.
00:35:07Missing our apartment?
00:35:08Does the dog miss the pound?
00:35:11All right, my turn.
00:35:12Hand it over.
00:35:22I think we made the right decision.
00:35:24Definitely.
00:35:25Most outrageously priced hotel in the city.
00:35:27Or else can you get a $10 bar of chocolate?
00:35:30I meant about us.
00:35:33Definitely.
00:35:34No regrets.
00:35:37I get to spend some quality time with the person I care about the most.
00:35:41And that's more than most people get in their lives, right?
00:35:44We can grow old and miserable, alone probably,
00:35:47because one of us will go first.
00:35:48Penniless.
00:35:50Or we can be in control of how and when it ends.
00:35:54Isn't that what most people want?
00:35:57And what's that?
00:35:59To spend the last moments of your life with the person that you love.
00:36:02Hmm.
00:36:06So what's next?
00:36:09Sushi.
00:36:10Oh.
00:36:11I want lots and lots of expensive raw fish.
00:36:13Okay.
00:36:14I'm talking about good stuff.
00:36:15None of that bargain sushi.
00:36:16Let's do it.
00:36:17I just want to order everything.
00:36:18Everything.
00:36:19And not even worry about the cost.
00:36:20I want to get some of the ultra overpriced, uh...
00:36:22Toro.
00:36:23Toro.
00:36:24I love that.
00:36:25Okay.
00:36:26Really?
00:36:27We have the rules now.
00:36:29So we're really doing this?
00:36:30Yeah.
00:36:32Good.
00:36:34Oh boy.
00:36:35Anything wrong?
00:36:36Well, Brian is...
00:36:38You know what?
00:36:39I don't want to know.
00:36:40Just...
00:36:42Let's just go get some raw fish.
00:36:44Okay?
00:36:45I'm starving actually.
00:36:47Finish these drinks and go get sushi.
00:36:49Hop in the pool?
00:36:50Okay.
00:36:51You first.
00:36:52Show you my California roll.
00:36:53Let's check out this pool.
00:36:56Here.
00:36:57Give me that.
00:36:58Psst.
00:36:59Let me hold your drink.
00:37:02Wait.
00:37:03It looks good, doesn't it?
00:37:04It does.
00:37:09I had to do it.
00:37:10I'm sorry.
00:37:12Is it warm?
00:37:16You coming in?
00:37:17I don't know.
00:37:18I have to test it first.
00:37:19Down here.
00:37:20Touch it, lady.
00:37:21Don't.
00:37:22Don't.
00:37:23Get away.
00:37:24Get away.
00:37:30It's nice, isn't it?
00:37:31Yeah, it is actually.
00:37:51Oh, my.
00:37:52Because many of us have...
00:37:53Chi...
00:37:54Better stop.
00:37:55I don't have an electric guitar.
00:37:56Ah, yeah.
00:37:57Love?
00:37:59Hell.
00:38:00Little!
00:38:01I love it.
00:38:10They just provide a kit and adapter.
00:38:12Oops.
00:38:13I love your car.
00:38:14I really эксп up, isn't it?
00:38:15Yeah.
00:38:16I don't need anything to know if you want.
00:38:18I see one thing.
00:38:19acement is enough.
00:38:20Mmm, it's been so long since I've had salmon.
00:38:44It's so good.
00:38:45I want to save this moment.
00:38:50No, don't.
00:38:55Everyone's gonna think I'm a pig.
00:38:57Turn it off.
00:38:58We love to watch you eat.
00:38:59Bite me.
00:39:01So, how was the sushi meal?
00:39:04Good, considering the last six months all we've had is peanut butter and canned tuna.
00:39:10It's amazing.
00:39:15What's wrong?
00:39:17Nothing's wrong.
00:39:18Turn it off.
00:39:19What?
00:39:20Turn it off.
00:39:21What is it?
00:39:23We haven't been this happy in a long time.
00:39:31Remember last time we were at this exact counter?
00:39:34Yeah.
00:39:35Celebrating my first commission as an architect.
00:39:37I designed an outdoor playground.
00:39:39Yeah, I remember.
00:39:40You got your promotion after that.
00:39:41And we used the bonus as the money for our down payment on the house?
00:39:44Yeah.
00:39:45We had some great times there.
00:39:49Wasn't this about stuffing ourselves with raw fish?
00:39:52Until we burst?
00:39:53So let's do that.
00:39:55What else are we getting?
00:39:56Everything.
00:39:57Everything.
00:39:58We're at the beginning.
00:39:59Yes.
00:40:00It was good.
00:40:01Is Brian the only one that texts you?
00:40:02He's the only one of our friends that didn't mind we're in the poorhouse.
00:40:04Yeah.
00:40:05I guess I give him credit for that.
00:40:06Yeah, we should have done that a long time ago.
00:40:07You always have the best ideas.
00:40:09I think I overdid it though.
00:40:10That last tuna hand roll put me over the edge.
00:40:11Yeah.
00:40:12That was good though.
00:40:13Losing my physique.
00:40:14You can see the tuna roll.
00:40:15I want shoes.
00:40:24Designer's shoes.
00:40:25Robert's and Boulevard.
00:40:26Robert's and Boulevard Jennifer is in route.
00:40:34Robertson Boulevard, Jennifer is en route.
00:40:39I like that coat. I'm looking on you.
00:40:41Yeah?
00:40:42Ooh, but I like that one for me.
00:40:44We're going in there.
00:40:45You want to get a matching coat?
00:40:46No.
00:40:47We should walk the whole thing and come up with a plan.
00:40:50No, I think I'm just going to go in every store.
00:40:53Excellent.
00:40:54I mean, that's the plan I think.
00:40:56Would you please define Hog Wild for us?
00:40:58Yes.
00:40:59That is when you can go in any store
00:41:01and buy any high-end fashion piece of clothing you want.
00:41:03And not care how much it costs.
00:41:05Let's go.
00:41:33What do you think about this one?
00:41:43Mmm. Yes, very cute.
00:41:45Your rack of shoes on sale, but we don't care about prices,
00:41:48so it doesn't matter.
00:41:49Get rid of it.
00:41:51There we go.
00:41:52Actually, I like these.
00:41:53These are super cute.
00:41:54Those are very unique.
00:41:55Yeah, these are fun.
00:41:56Kind of.
00:41:57I don't know, like kind of rockabilly.
00:41:58Did you do that?
00:41:59Totally.
00:42:00See, I think now we're heading in the right direction.
00:42:01You like black.
00:42:02You do.
00:42:03I do.
00:42:04Let's go try these on.
00:42:05Let's do it.
00:42:06Let's go try these on.
00:42:07Let's do it.
00:42:08I'm going to try this one.
00:42:09Yeah, you do.
00:42:10Try it on.
00:42:11Let's get changed.
00:42:12I'm trying on some new clothes.
00:42:13Mm-hmm.
00:42:14First of all, I'm going to try these on.
00:42:15You do.
00:42:16I do.
00:42:17Let's go try these on.
00:42:18Let's do it.
00:42:19Mm-hmm.
00:42:20Does anyone want to try this one on?
00:42:21Yeah, you do.
00:42:22Try it on.
00:42:23Let's get changed.
00:42:24I'm trying on some new clothes.
00:42:25Mm-hmm.
00:42:26First time in a long time.
00:42:27Turn it off.
00:42:28I'm going to wait to see that.
00:42:43I can't wait to see that.
00:42:49I can't wait to see that.
00:42:52I can't wait to wear these.
00:42:57Yes, let's go put them on.
00:42:59Especially the laundry, right?
00:43:01Mm-hmm.
00:43:02There's a lot of shopping.
00:43:04It used to be us.
00:43:09What?
00:43:11Moving at light speed, aiming for the stars.
00:43:14Brilliant light beckoning us towards a future that was never to be.
00:43:18You're so poetic, Kevin.
00:43:21Oh, my minor was English lit.
00:43:23Oh, I was there when you failed your final in Mitz Urban Remedios and Dreams.
00:43:28That's not fair. That is not fair.
00:43:30Professor Ballantine headed out for me from the beginning
00:43:32because she overheard me talking about her nasty divorce.
00:43:34You always did have a way of winning people over.
00:43:36I won you over, didn't I?
00:43:38Barely!
00:43:39I think you had to ask me out, like, over 26 times.
00:43:41You were counting?
00:43:43Most guys would have taken the hint.
00:43:45I was committed.
00:43:46But aren't you happy now?
00:43:48Yeah.
00:43:50I hate to spend the rest of my life with the man I adore.
00:43:55And then end it with him.
00:43:57What more could a girl ask for?
00:43:59Mm-hmm.
00:44:05Let me see who it is.
00:44:06Who could it be?
00:44:07Oh, I wish it would not.
00:44:08Let me see. Is it Brian?
00:44:09I don't know.
00:44:10It's a little hostility.
00:44:13Okay, I have a deal for you.
00:44:15Today will be a text-free day.
00:44:17Brian will have to go 24 hours without your sage advice.
00:44:19What are you offering in return?
00:44:24I will be the most loving, wonderful wife you've ever known.
00:44:30I think you're getting the better end of the deal.
00:44:32Mm-mm.
00:44:46No, I think you are.
00:44:47Okay.
00:44:56Okay.
00:44:57What's next?
00:44:58You said you wanted to go to Vegas, right?
00:45:01I guess, yeah.
00:45:02So let's go?
00:45:03At this moment?
00:45:04Yeah.
00:45:05We can't. We don't have reservations.
00:45:06We just get in the car and go.
00:45:09Shouldn't we pack?
00:45:11No.
00:45:12I just bought some clothes.
00:45:13We can buy clothes there.
00:45:14We just go.
00:45:15I can live with that.
00:45:18When did you get so spontaneous?
00:45:21Maybe I always was, and you just didn't notice.
00:45:23I think in four years of marriage, I might have noticed.
00:45:26Well, that was a before, when I thought we had a future.
00:45:30No, it doesn't really matter.
00:45:31We can just live in the moment.
00:45:32Yeah.
00:45:35I like this new lifestyle.
00:45:38It's a bummer that it's going to be over so soon.
00:45:41It ends for everyone.
00:45:43Just know now when.
00:45:48So let's go.
00:45:49All right. Let's do it.
00:45:50Vegas.
00:45:52Vegas!
00:45:53In four hours, I'm going to be sitting by a pool and sipping on Mai Tai.
00:46:05This will not do.
00:46:07What?
00:46:08We need an upgrade.
00:46:10We need new wheels.
00:46:23If let's go.
00:46:24You're not going to be doing rain off.
00:46:25Then behind me.
00:46:26We don't get it.
00:46:27The cracks and now we're driving down together when it rolls
00:46:31Polygraphs lie, I'll testify
00:46:34If I could get a pardon from the highest care
00:46:37But you can take what you want to believe
00:46:42If you take what I say to the truth
00:46:44A fundamental regard is all that we require
00:46:49To frame it all on you
00:46:51Let's try looking at the bright side
00:46:55And we're gonna block it as a mirror
00:46:58Let's try thinking of the good times
00:47:01And we're gonna ride the way of our pockets
00:47:05You can fly with your sky
00:47:08I will be far as if you'll realize you
00:47:12Sometimes we're gonna be dead
00:47:15This is a waste of time
00:47:17Too bad we didn't get the Lamborghini, huh?
00:47:20Yeah, we're really slowing it now
00:47:22Yeah, it's okay
00:47:23I like living out my high school muscle car fantasies
00:47:26Yeah, just like every other red-blooded American male
00:47:28Next thing you know, we're gonna watch football and eating steak
00:47:31Absolutely
00:47:33So, Kevin
00:47:38What's the first thing you're gonna do when you get to the city of Sin?
00:47:41I think you better turn the camera off for this answer
00:47:43I'm thinking everyone wants to know
00:47:45Uh-uh, this is PG suicide log
00:47:47I wanna know
00:47:48I think everyone wants to know
00:47:49I'm gonna shoot crap
00:47:54And then move on to roulette
00:47:56Yeah, right
00:47:57Come on
00:47:58Honestly?
00:47:59Mm-hmm
00:47:59This is kind of embarrassing
00:48:01Who cares?
00:48:02We're gonna be gone
00:48:03That's true
00:48:04All right, first we're gonna check in
00:48:07Uh-uh
00:48:08And then
00:48:11We're gonna go up to the room
00:48:13Open the door
00:48:14And then I'm gonna kiss you passion
00:48:17Tell me about the kiss
00:48:18Passion
00:48:20Do we really do this?
00:48:22Come on
00:48:23Yes, yes
00:48:24Okay
00:48:25Then as I throw you on the bed
00:48:29I'm gonna tear the clothes from you
00:48:32I'm gonna start kissing you
00:48:34Everywhere
00:48:35Every inch of you
00:48:37Just work my way down every curve
00:48:41And rediscover your womanhood
00:48:43Every inch
00:48:45You're bad, Kevin Elfern
00:48:47Bad boy
00:48:54Make what you want
00:48:55So believe
00:48:56If you take what I say
00:48:58The truth
00:48:59Let's try
00:49:01In the good times
00:49:03Gonna ride the wave
00:49:04I'm not laughing
00:49:05It's so hard
00:49:07You can follow
00:49:08If you're lost at all
00:49:10I will be lost
00:49:11And there'll be a smile
00:49:13The sun starts quicker
00:49:15Every day
00:49:16If this is a waste time
00:49:18I will just walk away
00:49:20Well, you can see right through
00:49:29Yeah
00:49:30Remember what happened
00:49:32In this very spot?
00:49:34No
00:49:35You don't remember?
00:49:38I do
00:49:38You're proposing to me
00:49:40Right over there
00:49:40Actually, I think
00:49:42It was right over there
00:49:43Did you mean
00:49:45What you said in the car?
00:49:48Mm-hmm
00:49:48Well, let's not wait around here
00:49:58I feel like this is our wedding night
00:50:01I can't wait to see the room
00:50:02I hope they have a jacuzzi
00:50:04Vegas!
00:50:06I don't mind
00:50:07I don't mind
00:50:08I don't mind
00:50:09I don't mind
00:50:10I don't mind
00:50:11I don't mind
00:50:12I don't mind
00:50:13I don't mind
00:50:14I don't mind
00:50:15I don't mind
00:50:16I don't mind
00:50:17I don't mind
00:50:18I don't mind
00:50:19I don't mind
00:50:20I don't mind
00:50:21I don't mind
00:50:22I don't mind
00:50:23I don't mind
00:50:24I don't mind
00:50:25I don't mind
00:50:26I don't mind
00:50:27I don't mind
00:50:28I don't mind
00:50:29I don't mind
00:50:30I don't mind
00:50:31I don't mind
00:50:32I don't mind
00:50:33I don't know.
00:52:03Let's get you diamonds.
00:52:29Yeah, lots. Real ones. These are not expensive enough.
00:52:32But we could get you a cicada. That'd be gorgeous on you.
00:52:35That's a locust.
00:52:35Right here. Isn't that the same thing?
00:52:37I'm thinking no. I'm thinking let's press on to the more expensive stuff.
00:52:40The more expensive stuff.
00:52:41Yeah, it's just not enough.
00:52:43Let's gamble.
00:52:47Come up on the fountain with me.
00:52:49And do what?
00:52:53My lady.
00:52:55Now what was it you said?
00:52:56No, no. What did you say?
00:52:58You said something.
00:52:58I don't want to ever be with anyone else.
00:53:06Let's get married again.
00:53:08What? What did you say?
00:53:10I mean, take vows.
00:53:11Tell each other we're going to spend the rest of our lives with each other.
00:53:14That's what I thought you said.
00:53:16This guy can't even say I love you to me.
00:53:18Nope.
00:53:23Oh.
00:53:24Oh.
00:53:25Kevin.
00:53:27Alpern.
00:53:28Do you love me?
00:53:29You know I do.
00:53:31Then say those three little words.
00:53:35I think you already know the answer to that.
00:53:38I think you should say it.
00:53:41I couldn't hear that one.
00:53:44Say it again.
00:53:46Attention everyone.
00:53:49I love this woman.
00:53:51I love this woman.
00:53:53I love this woman more than any man has ever loved a woman before.
00:53:58Oh my God.
00:53:59Does that work for you?
00:54:01You think that's the wine talking?
00:54:03I kept up my end of the bargain.
00:54:07You're crazy.
00:54:10Will you marry me?
00:54:14Yeah.
00:54:19Good.
00:54:20Let's go.
00:54:21I want to remove your garter belt this time.
00:54:23I didn't get to it at our first wedding.
00:54:25At our first wedding?
00:54:26Yeah.
00:54:31And here you are at the Little White Wedding Chapel in Las Vegas, Nevada.
00:54:35Once again in front of the altar of marriage.
00:54:38Kevin, do you take Jennifer once again to be your wedded wife?
00:54:41I do.
00:54:41And do you still promise to love and honor, respect and keep her all the days of your life?
00:54:48I do.
00:54:48Father God, we thank you for their love for each other, their commitment to each other, and the celebration of four years of holy matrimony together.
00:55:07Lord, we ask you to continue to give them courage and strength to live up to the sacred vows that they are taking again here today.
00:55:14As we ask you to bless these people that they're exchanging.
00:55:17May they continue to rise.
00:55:18May they all be.
00:55:19May they continue to rise.
00:56:19Whoa.
00:56:25Luxury suite, baby.
00:56:29Oh.
00:56:33Happy honeymoon.
00:56:35Oh.
00:56:41Brain hurts.
00:56:43Mm-hmm.
00:56:45Maybe we didn't need that goldschlager,
00:56:47followed by that Jägermeister.
00:56:51That's a winning combination.
00:56:53For a hangover.
00:56:55Mm-hmm.
00:56:57How'd you end up down there?
00:57:01I think I found your knee in the night.
00:57:05Mm.
00:57:07I'd do it again.
00:57:09Mm.
00:57:13Mm.
00:57:15Mm.
00:57:17Mm-hmm.
00:57:19Mm-hmm.
00:57:21Mm-hmm.
00:57:23Hey.
00:57:25Cheers.
00:57:27Mm-hmm.
00:57:29Mm-hmm.
00:57:31Mm-hmm.
00:57:33Jane, can we move here forever?
00:57:35Vegas is everything.
00:57:37Good food.
00:57:39Good people.
00:57:41Good vices.
00:57:43Good people.
00:57:45Good vices.
00:57:47Where else can you get crab legs at 2 in the morning
00:57:49and then shoot traps until dawn?
00:57:51Nowhere.
00:57:52Your point?
00:57:53My point is that Vegas is paradise.
00:57:55And I don't want to leave.
00:57:57Are you serious about going through with it?
00:57:59Yes, I was.
00:58:03I am.
00:58:04How much longer do we have?
00:58:05I don't know.
00:58:07Give or take a month, depending on how you're supposed to be.
00:58:09I'm not going to be in the night.
00:58:11You're not going to be in the night.
00:58:13Yeah, I'm not going to be in the night.
00:58:15You're not going to be in the night.
00:58:17I'm not going to be in the night.
00:58:19Yeah, you're going to be in the night.
00:58:21You're going to be in the night.
00:58:22Save or take a month, depending on how much we have left on our credit cards.
00:58:26How much are we going through?
00:58:28I'd say, like, six or eight grand.
00:58:30Six or eight grand?
00:58:32Living like rock stars is expensive, Kevin.
00:58:35Yeah, I know, but it's not like we rented jets or threw parties or...
00:58:43Are you having second thoughts?
00:58:46Honestly?
00:58:52No.
00:58:55I mean, kinda. Yeah.
00:58:58It made it sound like a good idea when you came up with it.
00:59:01You think it's gonna get better?
00:59:03I don't know.
00:59:04It's not. We've...
00:59:06We've already gone over this.
00:59:12Would you do it without me?
00:59:14No. No.
00:59:17No.
00:59:19We're in this together.
00:59:22And so, Kevin and Jennifer make their way from the city of Osin onto the next leg of their adventure.
00:59:31Where will these wandering souls end up?
00:59:34The next stop of the intrepid adventurers will be...
00:59:37What's next on the list?
00:59:39Uh, I don't know. Let me look.
00:59:41Um, the next on the list was African safari, followed by the trip to the south of France, and then the outback of Australia.
00:59:50I vote outback.
00:59:51No. That would be diverging from the plan.
00:59:53Yeah, but we're not set in stone. We can diverge from the plan.
00:59:56Ah, you know me. Once I make a plan, I would stick to it.
00:59:58Yeah, you like to stick to it.
00:59:59Yeah.
01:00:00But there's all kinds of crazy diseases we could catch, you know? Like Ebola, where you bleed out all your orifices.
01:00:05No, they have shots for that.
01:00:06No, they don't. It's one of those diseases where there's no cure. Once you get it, you're gone.
01:00:11Oh.
01:00:12Hi, Mom.
01:00:15I'm here. I'm getting your room ready for you.
01:00:18Um, I don't know if we're gonna make it for Thanksgiving anymore.
01:00:21Oh, I'm sorry.
01:00:23We just, we can't afford the plane tickets.
01:00:25Well, we'll miss you both very much.
01:00:27Thank you. I, I appreciate that.
01:00:29Are you still looking for work?
01:00:31Yes, he's looking. No job leads yet, I told you.
01:00:34I've got to run the corner and survive. Love you.
01:00:36All right. I love you, too.
01:00:38You actually just lied to your mother.
01:00:41What was I supposed to tell her?
01:00:43That we're planning on offing each other and we won't be around come turkey day.
01:00:47Yeah, that would have played out well.
01:00:49Oh, come on. Your mom would have taken it in stride.
01:00:51Not funny.
01:01:08But I'm sorry.
01:01:09Yeah.
01:01:10I'll be back in stride.
01:01:11I think so.
01:01:12I don't know.
01:01:13I don't know.
01:01:14I don't know.
01:01:15I don't know.
01:01:16I'm not what we're looking for.
01:01:17I don't know.
01:01:18I don't know.
01:01:19It's my name.
01:01:20I know.
01:01:21I'm not everyone.
01:01:22I can't imagine.
01:01:23I'm so sorry.
01:01:24I'm so sorry.
01:01:25I can't imagine.
01:01:26I'm not know.
01:01:27Ah, this is about hmm.
01:01:28I could see me.
01:01:29Nothing's not in a problem.
01:01:30I'm sorry.
01:01:31I can't imagine.
01:01:32I'm sorry.
01:01:33I can't see you.
01:01:35Yeah, I can't imagine.
01:02:36None of the cards are working.
01:03:06You can't cancel those cards.
01:03:08There are cards.
01:03:08I'm sorry, sir.
01:03:09There's nothing else to do.
01:03:10Well, turn them back on.
01:03:11I can't turn them on, sir.
01:03:12I just can't.
01:03:13What do you mean you can't do that?
01:03:14You can reapply with a credit line.
01:03:15No, I'm not going to reapply.
01:03:17Those are our cards.
01:03:18I need those cards.
01:03:19I'm sorry, sir.
01:03:20There's nothing else to do.
01:03:21No, no, I'm sorry.
01:03:22No.
01:03:23You know, you have a nice day.
01:03:24Thank you for being a customer.
01:03:25No, thank you for ruining the rest of what's left of my life.
01:03:28They can't cancel those cards.
01:03:32There are cards.
01:03:35Aren't you the least bit upset?
01:03:39You don't seem like it.
01:03:41How are we supposed to pay for anything?
01:03:42We can't pay for Paris or the Outback or the safari with our good looks alone.
01:03:49Maybe you could because you're so pretty.
01:03:51As pretty as Beth.
01:03:52What?
01:04:01What are we going to do?
01:04:02No, Kevin.
01:04:03The question is, what are you going to do about Beth having your baby?
01:04:08What are you talking about?
01:04:08Who's Beth?
01:04:10Because you got a text message from her while you were pumping gas, and she mentioned how nicely she's coming along and that you'd be a daddy soon.
01:04:16And I didn't think you wanted to have kids, Kevin, or was that just not with me?
01:04:20Is that it?
01:04:23No.
01:04:26When were you going to tell me you were going to be a father, huh?
01:04:29We could have thrown a party.
01:04:31It takes time to plan a baby shower, Kevin.
01:04:33You've got to have some consideration for the family flying in from out of town.
01:04:37But then again, Kevin, consideration was never one of your strong suits, was it?
01:04:43Or you could have had the party local for her.
01:04:45Her family wouldn't have to fly anywhere.
01:04:47Where is she from?
01:04:48Let's see, area code 609, serving all of greater Silicon Valley.
01:04:53What are you doing hooking up with a girl so far away, Kevin?
01:04:57Wouldn't you want someone closer for easier access?
01:04:59I know, when you were working on that condo development, your credit card bills seemed a little high.
01:05:10You know, if you're ever going to cheat on anyone again, Kevin, you should consider using cash for your extramarital affairs.
01:05:15That or marry a really stupid girl.
01:05:20You know, I read all of the texts, Kevin.
01:05:22I especially like the one about your love muscle.
01:05:26Or how you want to take her doggy style.
01:05:28Or how you want to have a threesome with her.
01:05:31Which you said, of course, that you didn't want to do with anyone.
01:05:34So were you lying to me, or to her, or to all of us?
01:05:36Huh?
01:05:36God, are you even capable of being committed to one person, Kevin?
01:05:48Turn that off.
01:05:49Why, Kevin?
01:05:50Turn that off!
01:05:50Why should I?
01:05:51See, I can raise my voice too, Kevin.
01:05:53Does that help us?
01:05:53Turn it off!
01:05:57You know what?
01:05:57And to answer your question about earlier, about what are we going to do,
01:06:00it's not about we anymore, because we are getting divorced.
01:06:03Fine.
01:06:03Fine.
01:06:05Yeah, it's fine that you just act like a complete douchebag and break apart.
01:06:18Let's just go.
01:06:20Drive.
01:06:20Drive.
01:06:33How could you do this?
01:06:51You want to know how I could do it?
01:06:53Because I never loved you, Jennifer.
01:06:55Because how could I want to be with someone who was always needling me about everything?
01:06:58Everything had to be so planned out.
01:07:01Everything was a number, you know?
01:07:03There was a plan we couldn't diverge from.
01:07:06You know, there was never any spontaneity.
01:07:09You slept with someone else because I wasn't spontaneous?
01:07:13I made a mistake, all right?
01:07:16You call getting your girlfriend pregnant a mistake?
01:07:18She's not my girlfriend.
01:07:19Pull over.
01:07:28What?
01:07:28Pull over!
01:07:29Pull over!
01:07:49Jen, what are you doing?
01:07:54Go away, Kevin.
01:07:55You can't just walk away.
01:07:56I can do whatever I want, just like you can.
01:07:58You'll die out here.
01:07:59Good!
01:08:00Wasn't that the plan anyway?
01:08:03I'm sorry about what I said.
01:08:06Sorry about what you said or sorry about what you did?
01:08:08Both.
01:08:10What were you thinking?
01:08:11What were you thinking?
01:08:15I screwed up.
01:08:16I'm sorry.
01:08:16I want a divorce.
01:08:21You're going to throw our marriage over this?
01:08:24You already did.
01:08:29Who is she?
01:08:30She's just someone I met.
01:08:33Great.
01:08:33You're having a baby with someone you don't even know?
01:08:35Are you out of your mind?
01:08:37I screwed up.
01:08:37I'm sorry.
01:08:39Me too.
01:08:41Look, it was nothing.
01:08:42It was just one time.
01:08:43It wasn't even serious.
01:08:44Great.
01:08:45Awesome.
01:08:45So obviously you're not even serious about us.
01:08:50Can we just get back in the car?
01:08:52It's freezing out here.
01:08:53Good.
01:08:53I hope you freeze to death.
01:09:01Just take me home.
01:09:02Look, I know this may not be the best time to talk about this, but what are we going to do with whatever new we spent?
01:09:24Well, I'll pay it back.
01:09:26How?
01:09:28I don't know, Kevin.
01:09:29But I'm not going to end my life with someone who obviously didn't want to spend it with me.
01:09:33I'm not going to end my life with you, but I'm not going to end my life with you.
01:09:37I do love you, Jennifer.
01:09:38Yeah, you have some twisted idea of love.
01:09:44If I didn't love you, would I want to end my life with you?
01:09:47You weren't going to do it out of love for me.
01:09:50We were both miserable.
01:09:51I was only going to go through with it because of you.
01:09:52Don't give me that.
01:09:53You're just as miserable as me.
01:09:55You were just looking for a way out and I gave it to you.
01:09:57We agreed we were going to do it together.
01:09:59Yeah, well, that was before all this.
01:10:01You're going to do it alone?
01:10:03Don't worry about it, Kevin.
01:10:06What about our plans?
01:10:08I'd rather live the rest of my life alone and miserable than end my life with you.
01:10:12But if you want to go ahead and kill yourself, go ahead. I don't care.
01:10:21I will then.
01:10:23Fine.
01:10:23And don't expect me to feel guilty about it because I won't.
01:10:30You want to know how I'm going to do it?
01:10:31No, I don't care.
01:10:32Oh, you don't care at all how I'm going to...
01:10:34No, and when we get back, I'm moving out.
01:10:37I'll get myself later.
01:10:38Where are you going?
01:10:40That's really none of your business, is it?
01:10:46Jen, I really think you're taking this too far.
01:10:48Please, just don't talk to me for the duration of this trip.
01:10:53Jennifer, wait. Wait.
01:11:02Jennifer, wait. Wait. Just hear me out.
01:11:21Please reconsider.
01:11:23I have to go.
01:11:23But talk about this.
01:11:25I know what I did was really stupid, but it was never meant to be more than just a...
01:11:28Just a fling?
01:11:30I know I sound pathetic and you hate me now, but...
01:11:33Yeah, you got that right. On both counts.
01:11:35Probably the smartest thing you've said all day.
01:11:41Goodbye, Kevin.
01:11:41I know.
01:12:02Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh.
01:12:32Oh, oh, oh.
01:13:02Oh, oh, oh, oh.
01:13:32Oh, oh, oh, oh.
01:14:02Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh.
01:14:32Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh.
01:14:34Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh.
01:14:36Anyway, uh, just give me a call when you get this.
01:14:41It'd be great.
01:14:42Okay, bye.
01:14:47Hey, Jennifer, you know Stu.
01:14:51Hey, Jen, uh, it's me, Kevin.
01:14:54Um, I haven't heard from you.
01:14:56So just, uh, give me a call when you get this.
01:15:00Okay.
01:15:06Uh, hey, Jen, this is Kevin.
01:15:12Uh, sorry to bother you.
01:15:15Uh, we, we, some more bills showed up.
01:15:18So I just was thinking that we should, uh, talk at some point.
01:15:24Um, hope you're doing well.
01:15:28Okay, call me back.
01:15:30Bye.
01:15:36Hey, Jen, uh, I love you.
01:15:48I miss you.
01:15:48Hi, I'm Kevin Alpern.
01:16:08I royally screwed up.
01:16:10I did some really stupid things.
01:16:12Originally, Jennifer and I were gonna end it together, but after careful thought, I decided
01:16:20to go it alone.
01:16:25I don't want to spend the rest of my life without her.
01:16:28I do love her.
01:16:30But that's not the reason I'm doing it.
01:16:32I just have that hunch that things aren't gonna get better.
01:16:35I mean, you know my story, credit card debt up the wazoo, and pretty soon I won't even
01:16:43be living here.
01:16:44You know, this will feel like luxury compared to what's next.
01:16:49I don't even want to think about the future.
01:17:01I got an eviction notice today.
01:17:03They were gonna kick me out of here.
01:17:05Well, that's the landlord.
01:17:09I like people who keep their promises.
01:17:24Well, I'm officially homeless now.
01:17:27Everything I own in one suitcase.
01:17:35It's kind of liberating in a way.
01:17:39No bills, no rules to follow, no responsibilities.
01:17:43Yeah, maybe.
01:17:47I made some mistakes.
01:17:49Or all some very big errors in judgment.
01:17:53It'll be okay.
01:18:04This is my new home.
01:18:11Spacious, huh?
01:18:12I'm gonna make the front seat in the kitchen, and the back seat's gonna be the living room
01:18:21and the bedroom.
01:18:22I miss her.
01:18:35What can I say?
01:18:38I miss you.
01:20:31So, how have you been?
01:20:34I've been really good.
01:20:36Yeah?
01:20:37Yeah.
01:20:41I've been miserable.
01:20:43I got evicted from our apartment.
01:20:46I've been living in my car for a while.
01:20:48I'm actually still living in my car.
01:20:54I applied for a couple of architecture positions.
01:20:58No calls back yet, but...
01:21:02I'm really sorry, Kevin.
01:21:03Oh, don't be.
01:21:08Something to be said for downward mobility, you know?
01:21:10There's a freedom in it.
01:21:14How about you?
01:21:15Um, I got hired by a new financial planning firm.
01:21:22I had to take a pay cut, but I'm not complaining.
01:21:26That's great.
01:21:27Good.
01:21:28You deserve it.
01:21:29Congratulations.
01:21:30Yeah.
01:21:32I guess I should thank you for being a total jerk-off.
01:21:35I guess, you know, if I go along with the plan...
01:21:37Um, I don't know.
01:21:41Hmm.
01:21:48Are you seeing anyone?
01:21:50Why do you care?
01:21:52Just wondering.
01:21:55No.
01:21:56Not that it's any of your business.
01:21:57We're separated.
01:21:59Right.
01:22:00You're totally right.
01:22:01Ugh.
01:22:01None of my business.
01:22:05Guess you're not planning on killing yourself now, huh?
01:22:08No.
01:22:09No.
01:22:10I don't know what I was thinking with that.
01:22:12I...
01:22:13I had my whole life to pay off those debts, so...
01:22:17Just figure it out.
01:22:19Move on.
01:22:22We...
01:22:23We did have a good time.
01:22:28We did.
01:22:28Well, it was really good seeing you.
01:22:39You too.
01:22:46Jennifer.
01:22:46Jennifer.
01:22:48If there was someone I'd want to kill myself with, it would be you.
01:22:52Because I don't think I want to live my life without you.
01:22:54When you first came up with this crazy plan, I went along with it because I didn't think
01:22:59we would go through with it, but...
01:23:01This time of part has reminded me why I fell in love with you.
01:23:04Why I want to spend the rest of my life with you.
01:23:07If you can find any way to forgive me, I will do anything in my power to make it up to you.
01:23:14I love you so much, Jennifer.
01:23:17I love you too, Kevin.
01:23:18I would like to say that's what I said to her.
01:23:31But I didn't.
01:23:33Good luck with your new position.
01:23:35Hey, things will get better.
01:23:37Keep your head up.
01:23:38Keep your head up.
01:24:08Jennifer moved on with her life.
01:24:19You know, workaholic that she is.
01:24:20She bros at her job and...
01:24:23fell in love with someone that deserved her.
01:24:30As for me...
01:24:32I stuck to the plan.
01:24:34See how the moon looks good on you.
01:24:56See how the light is a color blue.
01:25:06And all I feel is so much faith from learning how to survive.
01:25:13And all I got is one more chance.
01:25:18I hope it doesn't die.
01:25:22We were colored blue.
01:25:26Fall on me.
01:25:27All on me.
01:25:29All on you.
01:25:31Colored blue.
01:25:34Fall on me.
01:25:38Fall into you.
01:25:40See how the air is white and cold.
01:26:05The lines on me.
01:26:06The lines on her face mean she's getting old.
01:26:13And all I feel is so much hope from learning how to survive.
01:26:21And all I got is one last dance.
01:26:26I hope it ends tonight.
01:26:29All on me.
01:26:30I'm never on time.
01:26:36I'm never on time.
01:26:41I'm never on time.
01:26:57I'm never too late
01:27:01I'm never too shy
01:27:05I'm never too safe
01:27:09But nothing is real
01:27:13Our love is not fake
01:27:17Always a big deal
01:27:21So give me a break
01:27:27Like a runaway train to the other side
01:27:35Just trying to get a little sunshine
01:27:47Like a runaway train to the other side
01:27:51Just trying to get a little sunshine
01:27:58We'll be right back
01:28:06We'll be right back
01:28:12We'll be right back
01:28:14We'll be right back
01:28:16We'll be right back
01:28:26We'll be right back
01:28:34We'll be right back
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