- 7 weeks ago
When a jealous rival damages his father's vintage car, Sigi races against time to raise $250 for repairs at a swap meet before dad returns home
Category
🎥
Short filmTranscript
00:00:00Let's get out of here before the cop's done. Come on!
00:00:17Come on!
00:00:20Get yourself together
00:00:30Come on!
00:00:33Get yourself together
00:00:43Get down!
00:00:46Get yourself together
00:00:50Yeah!
00:01:00Get yourself together
00:01:02Hmm...
00:01:03Yeah!
00:01:04Yeah!
00:01:05Yeah!
00:01:06Yeah!
00:01:07Yeah!
00:01:08Yeah!
00:01:09Yeah!
00:01:10Yeah!
00:01:11Yeah!
00:01:12Yeah!
00:01:13Yeah!
00:01:14Yeah!
00:01:15Yeah!
00:01:16Yeah!
00:01:17Yeah!
00:01:18Yeah!
00:01:19Yeah!
00:01:20Yeah!
00:01:21Oh, if you're looking for that special treasure
00:01:25Oh, just a little bit of fresh air fish, yeah
00:01:35Here's where you will find
00:01:38A chance to let yourself unwind
00:01:41A place where you can have a real good time
00:01:48At this war really
00:01:51Yeah!
00:01:52Yeah!
00:01:53You got that special fire
00:01:54At this war really
00:01:58Guaranteed to satisfy
00:02:01At this war really
00:02:05Come on, you're all
00:02:06Take on the back!
00:02:07Ha-ha-ha!
00:02:10Yeah!
00:02:11All right!
00:02:13All right!
00:02:15Well, looks like you're having a problem, sweetheart
00:02:21Can we lend a hand?
00:02:22Would you please?
00:02:23I'll tell you what
00:02:25We got a special raid for pretty girls
00:02:27Ten dollars an hour
00:02:28Oh, come on
00:02:29We could really use the help
00:02:31We're going to the swap meet
00:02:32Maybe we could take it out and trade
00:02:34Oh, forget it!
00:02:35You don't know what you're missing
00:02:36Who needs that stuff?
00:02:45Oh, come on
00:02:46Don't let that ruin your day
00:02:47Yeah, I need the money for school
00:02:49Me too
00:02:50Come on, help me
00:02:51Help me
00:03:03Two fifty, please
00:03:06Here's your ticket
00:03:08Have a nice day
00:03:10Well, swap meeters
00:03:11It's a beautiful cloudless day
00:03:13It's nine thirty-five in the a.m.
00:03:15And here I am
00:03:16Ziggy the Biggie
00:03:17For the next ten hours
00:03:19It'll be me, Ziggy
00:03:20Your swap meet DJ
00:03:22Or after your money, honey
00:03:27Okay, how much you got today, Ziggy?
00:03:29Oh, just the usual
00:03:30You can't afford your inflated prices?
00:03:32You rip off your stuff, I rip you off
00:03:34That is the American way
00:03:36Am I right, Luke?
00:03:37Right, Ziggy
00:03:41How about the change?
00:03:42Play your favorite song on the PA for the difference
00:03:45Balls! That's my favorite song, Balls!
00:03:47We don't got it
00:03:48Uh, how about dedicating an entire album to someone you love?
00:03:52You don't love no one?
00:03:53What is this stuff here anyway?
00:03:55This is for our nostalgia freaks up
00:03:57Pieces of the original Hollywood sign
00:03:59Six inches of history for a buck a piece
00:04:01Uh, how about the change, Ziggy?
00:04:03Got any car stereos?
00:04:05No, no car stereos
00:04:06I was thinking perhaps you had mine
00:04:08It was stolen just the other day
00:04:10My heart bleeds for you, Ziggy
00:04:12How about the change?
00:04:13Oh, yeah
00:04:14Can you guys break a 50?
00:04:16Would you like me to break your 50?
00:04:17Oh, no, no, no, all right
00:04:18I'll give you the change
00:04:20Come on
00:04:21Here
00:04:22Have a lovely day
00:04:23Thank you, Ziggy
00:04:24Hello, Annie
00:04:35Benny
00:04:36You sure look good today
00:04:38You always say something nice
00:04:40How about tonight?
00:04:41How about tonight?
00:04:42Oh, uh, the only time I have free is during the intermission
00:04:45You probably want something to eat
00:04:47The lights will be on
00:04:49Yeah
00:04:50Well, we could talk or something
00:04:52And I'd split the cost of the popcorn
00:04:53Yeah, well, maybe
00:04:55But if you get any cancellations
00:04:57You know my car
00:04:59Annie
00:05:01Hiya, Fred
00:05:02Oh, oh, right at the beginning of the second feature, okay?
00:05:05Straight after the titles, okay
00:05:06I got a date for the coming attraction
00:05:08Oh, oh, say, Annie
00:05:09Could I borrow some money just until tonight?
00:05:11Sure, how much?
00:05:12Oh, well, five bucks
00:05:14Sure
00:05:15You know where I keep it, help yourself
00:05:18Oh
00:05:19Okay
00:05:25Oh, it's for my mother
00:05:26It's a present for her birthday
00:05:28Freddie, take ten
00:05:30Mothers deserve the best, don't you think?
00:05:32Oh, I do think
00:05:33Do you need any help?
00:05:35No, no, no
00:05:44Oh, hi, Dovima
00:05:45Dovima can see that you girls have had a hard time
00:05:49We had to change a tire on the way in
00:05:51Why do these things always happen to us?
00:05:54Why not?
00:05:55Is that philosophy?
00:05:56Sure
00:05:57Sure
00:05:58No charge
00:05:59Let me see your palm
00:06:05Fooey
00:06:09That's right
00:06:18When I go to heaven, I'm gonna get a car just like this
00:06:20How about you, Buddha?
00:06:22When I die, I'm gonna be buried in a car like this
00:06:25Yeah, well, if my father finds out I borrowed this car
00:06:28He's gonna bury me the way I am now
00:06:30Oh, look at that
00:06:32Hey, sweetheart, ever make it with a fat guy?
00:06:34I'm in a phone book under B for a beautiful human being
00:06:38Let's cut out of here and go to the swap
00:06:40But the management has asked me to announce that shoplifting is a no, no, no, no, no
00:06:46Anybody caught will be prosecuted to the fullest extent of the law
00:06:52Oh, hi, Annie
00:06:59Hi, Nancy
00:07:00Oh, you look beautiful
00:07:14Are you getting married?
00:07:15No
00:07:16I think a girl should always be ready for Mr. Wright
00:07:19Oh, not me
00:07:20I think I'll play the field a while before I settle down
00:07:23Takes all kinds
00:07:24Corsages and antique
00:07:27From your family?
00:07:28No, from the swap made
00:07:30Oh
00:07:31I got so dirty changing the tire on my van
00:07:35You ought to put a shower in here, don't you think?
00:07:38Mm-hmm
00:07:39Keep the change
00:07:43There ain't no change
00:07:44Don't tell us your problems
00:07:45Bye
00:07:46At the swap meet
00:07:48Yeah
00:07:49We got that special buy
00:07:51At the swap meet
00:07:53Yeah
00:07:54We got that special buy
00:07:55At the swap meet
00:07:58Yeah
00:07:59Guaranteed to satisfy
00:08:01At the swap meet
00:08:02Yeah
00:08:03Guaranteed to satisfy
00:08:04At the swap meet
00:08:06Ha-ha
00:08:07At the swap meet
00:08:09Yeah
00:08:10Come on along
00:08:11We gonna make
00:08:12Ha-ha
00:08:13Ha-ha
00:08:14Oh, yeah
00:08:15Come on
00:08:16Woo!
00:08:17If you're looking for a real goodbye
00:08:23On a love that's just a little time
00:08:30I know where there's a deal
00:08:35On the love that's so unreal
00:08:36On the love that's so unreal
00:08:39And you can't have them all at such a steal
00:08:46At the swap meet
00:08:48Yeah
00:08:50We got that special buy
00:08:53At the swap meet
00:08:55Go ahead and get
00:08:56To satisfy
00:08:59At the swap meet
00:09:00At the swap meet
00:09:02At the swap meet
00:09:03Come on along
00:09:04We gonna make
00:09:05At the swap meet
00:09:06Oh
00:09:07All
00:09:08All right
00:09:09Don't you like
00:09:10Yeah
00:09:11These are pieces of the genuine
00:09:15Genuine Hollywood sign
00:09:17Genuine Hollywood sign
00:09:18Genuine Hollywood sign
00:09:19Genuine Hollywood sign
00:09:20The real pieces of the real Hollywood sign
00:09:2175 cents
00:09:2275 cents
00:09:2375 cents
00:09:24You hold the money
00:09:25You hold the money
00:09:2675 cents
00:09:27To the swap meet
00:09:28Hey
00:09:29Come on folks
00:09:30Help send a girl to college
00:09:31And buy a turtle
00:09:32They're exotic
00:09:33And rare
00:09:34The perfect gift
00:09:36Stay with the turtles
00:09:37Come on
00:09:38Everybody needs a piss
00:09:39Hey
00:09:40We're ready to buy us
00:09:41Don't we have turtles up the kazoo
00:09:43So
00:09:44What's wrong with turtles?
00:09:45They're slimy
00:09:46I don't see how you can stand to pick them up
00:09:49Pick them up
00:09:50Aw they're cute
00:10:07Oh wow
00:10:08Turtles
00:10:09How much for these turtles?
00:10:10I'll buy them all
00:10:11Oh come on Roy
00:10:12Can't you see we're busy here?
00:10:16Uh
00:10:17Doesn't look that way to me
00:10:18Hey
00:10:19I thought only sellers were allowed in with their cars
00:10:21How come you got in with yours?
00:10:22I got this little thing here
00:10:24They uh
00:10:25Call it uh
00:10:29How about uh
00:10:30Me and you we go to uh
00:10:33Lunch someplace
00:10:34I got this nice place picked out in San Francisco
00:10:36Listen
00:10:37I don't care if you've got tickets to China
00:10:39I am not interested
00:10:41I
00:10:44I
00:10:45You don't know what's going on do you?
00:10:46I mean
00:10:47I offer you the world
00:10:48I mean
00:10:49I offer you the world
00:10:50And you
00:10:51You play with the turtle
00:10:52Don't touch him
00:10:57Well
00:10:58Look who brought his little toy to the meeting today
00:11:05Mayor I don't need you guys today
00:11:06I don't need you guys today
00:11:07Why don't you go play with your jock straps
00:11:08Oh
00:11:09Oh
00:11:10What he said
00:11:11Oh
00:11:12Oh
00:11:13Oh
00:11:14Get away from that
00:11:15Get away you're messing it up
00:11:16Oh
00:11:17Oh
00:11:18Oh
00:11:19Oh
00:11:20Would you stop it?
00:11:21Oh
00:11:22Oh you terrible
00:11:23How
00:11:24Oh
00:11:25Oh
00:11:26I'm sorry
00:11:27Oh
00:11:28Oh
00:11:29Oh
00:11:30We'll take care of this Mr Davis
00:11:31Oh
00:11:32I'm sorry Mr Davis
00:11:34Mr Davis
00:11:37Are those your wheels?
00:11:39That's my new car
00:11:40I just got it
00:11:41you scratch that car and you're dead sure is pretty yeah it sure is
00:11:48say you're doing anything tonight i'm not in the mood for any dates right now
00:11:56i'd probably have to break them anyway oh well uh maybe i'll see you around yeah maybe
00:12:04bye he's cute oh yeah mr high school star well you can have him well it's the real mccoy this is a
00:12:14genuine piece of the hollywood sign we brought it down last night one dollar five bucks hey look
00:12:19can't you see we're working over here thanks very much sir pleasure doing business with you
00:12:26hey look uh you want to stay working for my old man oh shit man good i'm glad i got your attention
00:12:34now you know those uh uh three guys and they're selling plants and they're driving a classic
00:12:40red t-bird uh yeah we sit around right good i want you to uh mess up that classic red t-bird just a
00:12:48little bit uh we don't that's not our business we don't do it how about for a hundred bucks
00:12:57what'd they do it doesn't matter all you have to do is put a couple of nice little dents in that car
00:13:02there's and teach them a lesson and you'll be doing a favor for me at the same time okay okay good
00:13:09uh you got one of these for uh joey i mean we could get in a lot of trouble uh police you know right
00:13:16just do a very good job okay okay
00:13:30annie it's all clear come on in ziggy
00:13:37nice day isn't it mind
00:13:43annie it's uh time to uh pack up and clear out
00:13:47i'm on my way
00:13:48listen annie my boss is beginning to figure it out about your living here
00:13:53and he's a very very very mean man
00:13:56we both could get into a whole lot of trouble
00:14:00like if he found me here he'd fire me
00:14:02i clean up his office every morning when i wake up
00:14:05i never leave any hairpins or lipstick lying around
00:14:07that's the trouble it's too clean he's a slob
00:14:10annie i want to know what you do during the swap meets and during the movies at night
00:14:16like i never see you around and then the next day you're always coming in with brand new clothing
00:14:21where do you get the dough to afford all that
00:14:24holy shit
00:14:25hi there hon
00:14:29nice day
00:14:30not when we were on looking at it
00:14:33playing the same deary
00:14:35and then the other day you're always coming in with brand new clothing
00:15:05You are worried about something.
00:15:26Don't worry.
00:15:29You are going to get a good job.
00:15:32I am always right.
00:15:35That boy is going to hurt himself.
00:15:42Ah!
00:16:12Oh, I'm sorry I'm late.
00:16:19I had to help bandage a young boy.
00:16:24He fell off his skateboard.
00:16:27Well, thanks for waiting.
00:16:29I'll give you a special massage for being so nice.
00:16:33Oh, he broke his arm.
00:16:37I can't bear to see pain of that poor little boy and everything.
00:16:42Mmm.
00:16:46Yeah, doesn't that make you feel better?
00:16:49Oh, yes.
00:16:51It smells just like my grandma's kitchen, really.
00:16:53What's the stuff you're using?
00:16:56Uh, how would you like a telecom massage?
00:17:03Make you feel like a baby.
00:17:06Uh, why don't you turn over now?
00:17:13Oh.
00:17:14Oh.
00:17:15Oh.
00:17:16Oh.
00:17:17Oh.
00:17:18Oh.
00:17:19Oh.
00:17:20Oh.
00:17:21Oh.
00:17:22Oh.
00:17:23Oh.
00:17:24There.
00:17:25Takes all the tiredness and hurting away.
00:17:28Oh.
00:17:29Oh.
00:17:30Oh.
00:17:31Oh.
00:17:32Oh.
00:17:33Oh.
00:17:34Nothing additional.
00:17:35Oh.
00:17:36Oh.
00:17:37Oh.
00:17:38Good idea.
00:17:39Oh.
00:17:40Oh.
00:17:41Oh.
00:17:42Oh.
00:17:43Oh.
00:17:44Oh.
00:17:45Oh, my.
00:17:46Oh, my! Oh, Doo-Doo! Oh! Oh, my naughty place is on fire!
00:17:55Oh, Doo-Doo! Oh, my naughty place!
00:17:59It's the greatest pain I've ever felt!
00:18:01I told you I don't like to see pain!
00:18:04Oh! Oh! Oh! Incredible!
00:18:09Oh, my! Oh! You know what you've done?
00:18:13It's just I'm so upset, you see, all that trying to be a nurse.
00:18:16And everything, I'll make it up to you.
00:18:19The next one's free.
00:18:21Free? No, no, you don't understand.
00:18:23You know, that hot towel on my naughty place was the best thing that ever happened to me.
00:18:27Oh, I'm sorry.
00:18:29Don't be sorry. You'll ruin it if you're sorry.
00:18:33Now, I'm gonna go out in that swap meet.
00:18:36And I'm gonna kick the butts of some of those kinkos and perverts out there.
00:18:40Teach them to screw around here.
00:18:46Take a look at my house and say, pick me up.
00:18:49All right!
00:18:52We're here!
00:18:53Yeah, the girls are here!
00:18:55All right!
00:18:56Take a look at my house and say, pick me up.
00:19:01Take a look at my house and say, pick me up.
00:19:05What are you looking at?
00:19:07That chick is a real dreg.
00:19:08She don't know where nothing's at.
00:19:11Hey, there they are.
00:19:12What you do, it takes me higher.
00:19:16High to the globe.
00:19:19On the shoe of a beam of lights, it's a millionthigh.
00:19:24Oh, let me slow.
00:19:27Watch you move to the music school of the devil's choir.
00:19:33I'll be low.
00:19:36In your mind, you better have to find all of my desire.
00:19:39Let me in your arms.
00:19:44Let me feel the magic charms of body rivers.
00:19:52Hi, sweetheart.
00:19:54You want to go dance?
00:19:57Yeah.
00:19:59How about you?
00:20:01You're good.
00:20:02You're awful good.
00:20:03No.
00:20:03I guess you don't watch any old movies, guys.
00:20:07That's impersonation.
00:20:11Okay.
00:20:13Excuse me, guys.
00:20:14Five glasses.
00:20:15Yeah, five glasses.
00:20:19I was glad when you said that you had to have me too.
00:20:25Ha, ha, ha.
00:20:26I'm glad we could get together tonight, Benny.
00:20:52I think you'll enjoy the rest of the picture.
00:20:54I've seen it five times, and it's still exciting.
00:20:57I don't suppose you could stick around a little bit.
00:20:59I'm beginning to get romantic again.
00:21:01You mustn't be greedy, Benny.
00:21:04Lots of lonely guys here.
00:21:06I've got my responsibilities.
00:21:09Much as I'd like to.
00:21:12Good night.
00:21:13What about tomorrow night?
00:21:15Did he really think you want to?
00:21:17They're playing the same picture.
00:21:20It's good, huh?
00:21:28Oh, I'm sorry.
00:21:29I thought you were someone else.
00:21:33Excuse me for breaking in, but afterwards try the pizza.
00:21:36It's very good.
00:21:37It's very good.
00:21:43Hey, Freddie, I'm a little bit earlier than I thought,
00:21:48so if you want to watch some more of the film, I can wait.
00:21:51Oh, God, no.
00:21:53Come on in.
00:21:55I've been thinking about you through the whole feature.
00:21:57I can't take it anymore, Annie.
00:21:59I can't get you out of my mind.
00:22:01Well, let me tell you what happens in the rest of the picture.
00:22:04The villain, you know the guy that's trying to get the diamonds off the young girl?
00:22:08Well, he has his mafia connections,
00:22:10and he asks them to kidnap the girl's mother.
00:22:12And they're going to hold her for ransom,
00:22:17and the police sergeant, who's really in love with the girl's mother,
00:22:20well, he has a friend in the mafia,
00:22:22and when he finds out of their plan, he decides to trap them.
00:22:25Can you guess where they're planning to take him?
00:22:28And who really has the diamonds off?
00:22:31What if I tell you the rest later?
00:22:33Yeah.
00:22:34Oh, Annie.
00:22:42Well, I hurried through the door, got it Play-Dohs.
00:22:47The bouncer smiled and said that he knew me.
00:22:51The ladies hit was playing in the disco.
00:22:55The bass guitar was thumping right on through me.
00:22:58You're going to miss high school?
00:23:01Not a chance.
00:23:03I bet you are, though.
00:23:05Oh, come on.
00:23:06Football champ, basketball champ.
00:23:09You were the center of it all.
00:23:12Oh, man.
00:23:14No, two more pictures, please.
00:23:15Oh, baby, if you only knew
00:23:20What a way to get so close to you
00:23:25Oh, baby, if you only knew you'd drive me crazy
00:23:29Drive me crazy
00:23:34Drive me crazy
00:23:39Drive me crazy
00:23:40Drive me crazy
00:23:42Don't step on my arm
00:23:45Don't step on my arm
00:23:46Hey, there's a green one
00:23:48Hey, there's a red one
00:23:49We jumped in and much to my surprise
00:23:53She said that maybe we could make it later
00:23:57Excuse me, sweetheart
00:23:58And look at me with fire in her eyes
00:24:02Oh, baby, if you only knew
00:24:07Get a feeling when I dance with you
00:24:11Oh, baby, if you only knew you'd drive me crazy
00:24:16Drive me crazy
00:24:20Oh, no
00:24:23Drive me crazy
00:24:25I'll be crazy
00:24:29Ow!
00:24:44hesitant
00:24:46Hey, let's go for a ride in your T-Birds.
00:25:02It's not exactly your T-Birds.
00:25:04I want to sit by the window.
00:25:05Hey, that's cool.
00:25:07Go in against the other window.
00:25:08Everybody gets a window.
00:25:09But I don't want a window.
00:25:10You get it just the same.
00:25:11Oh, man.
00:25:16What the hell is the matter with you two creeps?
00:25:36Can't you stop making life miserable for people?
00:25:38Who, us?
00:25:39Hope you got a lot of insurance.
00:25:41You don't even have the brains to dress yourselves right.
00:25:44Yeah, well, how'd you like me to knock your goddamn head off?
00:25:47Oh, tough, man.
00:25:49I'm scared.
00:25:50Yeah, well, you're full of shit.
00:25:53Man, man, you're fat.
00:25:55Just like me, man.
00:25:56We're brothers.
00:25:57You're giving fat people a bad name.
00:25:59I mean, fat people are fun-loving people.
00:26:01They love life.
00:26:04Disgusting.
00:26:05I mean, I'm going to have you thrown out of fat people's union, man.
00:26:08Because you're one no-good fat bastard.
00:26:11Yeah.
00:26:12Yeah?
00:26:12I use this to skin smart asses like you.
00:26:17Ever hear of Bruce Lee?
00:26:19He was my cousin.
00:26:21Come on, everybody.
00:26:21Let's get out of here.
00:26:22Hurry, come on.
00:26:24Hurry.
00:26:24Get in.
00:26:25Come on.
00:26:26Come on.
00:26:29Yeah, we'll get you, you son of a bitch.
00:26:31Come on.
00:26:32Come on.
00:26:33Come on.
00:26:34Come on.
00:26:35Come on.
00:26:35Come on.
00:26:36Come on.
00:26:36Come on.
00:26:37Come on.
00:26:37Come on.
00:26:38Come on.
00:26:38Come on.
00:26:39Come on.
00:26:40Come on.
00:26:41Come on.
00:26:42Oh, shit.
00:26:43Are you really going to fight that, Uncle Blard?
00:26:46Yeah, I want to stop you.
00:26:48Oh, yeah?
00:26:49How about me?
00:26:50I'm the one who got you guys out of this fix.
00:26:51Oh, well, you are both my heroes.
00:26:53Oh, no.
00:26:54Doug, it'll be all right.
00:26:55It's your car.
00:26:56You can get it fixed.
00:26:57It'll be simple.
00:26:58It's just a little dent.
00:26:59Yeah, well, it's not my car.
00:27:02It's my father's car.
00:27:03I only borrowed it.
00:27:04Oh, no.
00:27:05You know what Doug's father put into this car?
00:27:08Three years of working day and night just to make it a cherry.
00:27:12And when Doug's father finds out there's a dent in this baby,
00:27:15he's going to have a heart attack.
00:27:17Then he's going to kill Doug.
00:27:19He's in a lot of trouble, Nancy.
00:27:21Poor Doug.
00:27:35Hello.
00:27:36Hello.
00:27:37Oh.
00:27:38Let's see.
00:27:41Oh.
00:27:42Oh.
00:27:43What evil person did this terrible thing to this wonderful car.
00:27:47Like I told you on the phone, how much will it be?
00:27:50It's not a question of how much.
00:27:53This little work of art demands the utmost of concentrations of detail.
00:28:00First, my loving hands will take that fold of metal and gently tap it out from behind.
00:28:11Then, with the most precision of files and finest of sandpaper,
00:28:15I'll smooth it out where the bad people made it hurt.
00:28:19Then, we'll send away to Neptune, New Jersey to a special paint person
00:28:23who will lovingly mix the paint personally to match this baby to a T.
00:28:29Yes.
00:28:30Then, we'll apply the first coat.
00:28:33And instead of just letting it dry, Tex and I will blow warm breath on the paint.
00:28:39So it will dry evenly.
00:28:41You know, you put paint on here, it'll bubble up.
00:28:45It comes out.
00:28:46Max, how long will this take?
00:28:48I can have it for you six months.
00:28:51Jesus.
00:28:52You kidding?
00:28:53I gotta have this car by Friday before my father gets back.
00:28:55Friday?
00:28:56Max.
00:28:57Okay, you got it.
00:29:00It'll save you 250 clabs.
00:29:02Oh, no.
00:29:03That's it.
00:29:04Bottom line.
00:29:05250, period.
00:29:09It's a great car.
00:29:10It's worth fixing.
00:29:11250 dollars is not real much.
00:29:13It's up to you.
00:29:15I like him.
00:29:16I really like him.
00:29:17And I like the way he talked.
00:29:18At first.
00:29:19He's got two and a half.
00:29:20You got two and a half?
00:29:21Hell no.
00:29:25I got an idea though.
00:29:26I got an idea.
00:29:27We can sell some stuff at the swap meet.
00:29:29Sure.
00:29:30I got some old lamps and some old records my mama don't want.
00:29:32Sure, and I got some trophies.
00:29:33What trophies?
00:29:34I'd like to get my hands on you sons of bitches.
00:29:36Let me at him.
00:29:38Just let me at him.
00:29:39I'm gonna mash him.
00:29:41And then I'm gonna smash him.
00:29:43And then...
00:29:46I'm gonna sit on him.
00:30:13You guys here gonna sell that stuff?
00:30:18Yeah, well we sure need the bread.
00:30:20Cost you five bucks.
00:30:21Oh, well can we pay you in a week?
00:30:23We need every nickel.
00:30:24In a week?
00:30:25We are in the business of selling space.
00:30:26This is like Hollywood Boulevard, man.
00:30:28You can't get in here without paying the rent.
00:30:30This drive-in is a big operation.
00:30:33We got all sorts of taxes to pay.
00:30:35We got real estate taxes, withholding taxes, water taxes,
00:30:38overhead, underheads, you name it.
00:30:40Can we make a deal?
00:30:41You know I don't go in for that.
00:30:43We'll pay you tomorrow.
00:30:44Today.
00:30:45Tonight.
00:30:46Now.
00:30:47Okay, it's a deal.
00:30:48We'll pay you on the way out.
00:30:49What?
00:30:50On the way out?
00:30:51On the way out?
00:30:53Hey, don't be around.
00:30:54How did it go yesterday?
00:30:55Not too bad.
00:30:56But here I think I will do better.
00:30:58Yesterday they put me between the used tires
00:31:01and that Hitler Youth Gang.
00:31:03Man, the vibrations were wrong.
00:31:06Oh, how about us?
00:31:07Are we gonna do better?
00:31:08I think so.
00:31:09You want to take a look?
00:31:12Oh, yeah.
00:31:13Cut the deck.
00:31:14All right.
00:31:20There's gonna be problems.
00:31:22Disruptions.
00:31:24So what else is new?
00:31:26Don't worry.
00:31:27In time this too shall pass.
00:31:30Dovima, should I go steady with a guy that I just met?
00:31:36For a question of such emotional significance, I shall have to kill a chicken tonight and swing it around my head six times.
00:31:44Forget.
00:31:45Well, after you kill the chicken, could you ask a question for me too?
00:31:50Can a man who's gone out with a lot of women ever settle down with just one?
00:31:56For a chicken shit question like that, don't ask me.
00:32:00Ask dear Abby.
00:32:01That boy is going to hurt himself again.
00:32:07Yeah.
00:32:08Well, thanks a lot, Dovima.
00:32:09Hey, swamp eaters.
00:32:10Welcome their new little one to the meet.
00:32:11Hey, is this turtle dead?
00:32:12Well, of course not.
00:32:13All of our turtles are alive.
00:32:14Would you like us to paint it for you?
00:32:15Nah, he don't need no paint where he's going.
00:32:16I'm gonna flush him down the toilet.
00:32:17Aw, doesn't he have a cute sense of humor.
00:32:18You can't flush our turtles down the toilet, they're too big.
00:32:19Don't tell me what to do.
00:32:20I name him Reggie Jackson, cause I hate Reggie Jackson.
00:32:28Yeah?
00:32:29I flush Tom Seaver down the toilet.
00:32:32Steve Garvey down the toilet.
00:32:33Football stars, yeah.
00:32:35I'm sorry about that.
00:32:36I'm sorry, I'm sorry.
00:32:37I'm sorry.
00:32:38I'm sorry.
00:32:39You're sorry.
00:32:40I'm sorry.
00:32:41Yeah, I flushed Tom Seaver down the toilet, Steve Garvey down the toilet.
00:32:46If football starts, I'm going to flush O.J. Simpson.
00:32:54Well, guys, it looks like we're all set.
00:32:57Swap feeders, if your car is covered with dirt, bird droppings, or soot from the freeway,
00:33:03stop in at the Hollywood car wash on your way home.
00:33:06A clean car is a happy car.
00:33:09Oh, and the television sent you.
00:33:15Hey, kid, come here. Come here.
00:33:35Well, welcome, fellow merchants.
00:33:37Just checking out to see how business is going.
00:33:39You care to see our emboyum?
00:33:40We took it 75 cents so far.
00:33:42Ooh, sounds great.
00:33:44Hey, lady, before you go, I want to buy a turtle.
00:33:46Oh, you do, little boy.
00:33:48Well, I'll tell you what you do.
00:33:49Why don't you go home and put your head in the toilet and see how that feels?
00:33:53Give it a little flush.
00:33:54And if that doesn't work, you can come back tomorrow and maybe we'll sell you a turtle.
00:33:58I ought to report her.
00:34:00Well, you can report her to me, lady.
00:34:02Well, I will, you slut.
00:34:04Come on, Roger.
00:34:07I'll get you a pair of them.
00:34:09So what was that all about?
00:34:11Oh, just another satisfied customer.
00:34:13Oh, no.
00:34:16Oh.
00:34:17What?
00:34:18Is this stuff for sale?
00:34:21Of course it is.
00:34:22That's what it's all about.
00:34:23That's why we're here.
00:34:24Oh, I'm sorry, but nobody's going to buy stuff like this.
00:34:27Oh, yeah, I just sold one of these just like it for 75 cents.
00:34:31Uh-huh.
00:34:33These are the guys, Mr. Boone.
00:34:35I'll take care of it.
00:34:36Okay, Thomas, what's happening here?
00:34:38Huh?
00:34:38What do you mean?
00:34:39Come on, come on.
00:34:39It's Ziggy tells me you fellas didn't pay the set up to stand.
00:34:42Come on, back up.
00:34:43Back up.
00:34:43Back up.
00:34:44Anybody want to buy a turtle?
00:34:45Buy your mother a turtle.
00:34:46How's this, the, uh, turtle turret business going, sweetheart?
00:34:50It's fine until the air around here started getting bad.
00:34:52Oh, yeah?
00:34:53Well, let me tell you something.
00:34:54Those cops gave me a ticket last night because of your asshole boyfriend.
00:34:58Well, that's not my fault.
00:34:59Maybe you ought to learn how to drive.
00:35:02Joey, she's keeping the, uh, laughs coming, ain't she?
00:35:05Yeah, yeah, they give a clap.
00:35:10We're really sorry.
00:35:14We really are sorry.
00:35:17Take care of this.
00:35:22We're really sorry.
00:35:23Sorry.
00:35:23I got, uh, I got two and a quarter.
00:35:28What do you got?
00:35:29I got an extra buck that makes three and a quarter.
00:35:31What about you, Buddha?
00:35:49Change for a ten?
00:35:50Get your plan, 75 cents.
00:35:53I want a receipt.
00:35:55Yeah.
00:35:56Are you talking to me?
00:35:57Yeah, I'm talking to you.
00:35:58I'd like a receipt and sign in front of 500 witnesses.
00:36:02Those two guys just tore up our stand.
00:36:03What two guys?
00:36:04What two guys?
00:36:05Yeah.
00:36:06Him.
00:36:12Come on.
00:36:12Come on.
00:36:13I don't have enough of you guys.
00:36:15I don't want you around here.
00:36:17Clean your boots and get out of here.
00:36:18Get everything up.
00:36:20We'll go.
00:36:20Get out.
00:36:21Out.
00:36:22Out.
00:36:23Out.
00:36:24Hey.
00:36:26I don't believe it.
00:36:28Why did they do this to us?
00:36:30I don't know.
00:36:31They're crazy.
00:36:41Hey, there goes Annie.
00:36:42Keep on trucking, Annie.
00:36:47Let's hear it for S-E-X.
00:36:49You don't hear anybody complaining to you.
00:36:51Give people what they want.
00:36:53Makes them happy.
00:36:54And if you make them happy, they throw money at you.
00:37:02Hi, Ziggy.
00:37:04Business looks good today.
00:37:06Yeah, it's not bad.
00:37:08There's a new movie on tonight starring Nick Nolte.
00:37:11He's one of my favorites.
00:37:13I loved him in the deep.
00:37:15It's supposed to be just okay.
00:37:17Well, it opens tonight, and you know what that means.
00:37:21You're going to get all dressed up again.
00:37:23Oh, for Christ's sake, Annie, this ain't no big Hollywood premiere.
00:37:26Things are what you make them, Zygmunt.
00:37:29Oh, yeah?
00:37:29Would you mind if I plugged in my electric razor?
00:37:32I've got to shave my legs.
00:37:33You're going to wear something special tonight, aren't you, Ziggy?
00:37:54Maybe after the movie, we could go out and split a taco.
00:38:05Okay, do you want the complete sexual fulfillment for five, or the everything you want it for ten?
00:38:18For ten dollars.
00:38:20I think it is much.
00:38:23Next, B-Boy.
00:38:24You here for complete sexual fulfillment?
00:38:33No, I paid the ten dollars for the, uh, everything you wanted.
00:38:36Good choice.
00:38:38Now go ahead and tell us everything you want.
00:38:40Don't be shy.
00:38:41Speak right up.
00:38:42We're all listening.
00:38:43You mean there'll be five of us?
00:38:44Oh, you're good at math, too.
00:38:47Well, aren't you going to take the clothes?
00:38:50No, I hadn't planned on it.
00:38:52It ain't your pleasure, petting, getting it on, uh, poppers, hips.
00:38:57Oh, wait a minute.
00:38:58Don't I get to, uh, you know...
00:39:00Oh, well, yeah, sure.
00:39:02All of us are more than happy to talk to you about anything you'd like.
00:39:05We won't do it.
00:39:06We'll just talk.
00:39:09Come on, come on.
00:39:11Wait till the first time.
00:39:13Oh, man, this is a ripoff.
00:39:15I'm getting out of here.
00:39:16Come on, those other guys walked out of here with big smiles on their face.
00:39:21I mean, they were winking and giggling when they walked out of here.
00:39:24If they walked out yelling, screaming, and complaining, the other people in the line might think, uh, that they couldn't make it work.
00:39:29You get my drift?
00:39:31And we know that that would make you feel very bad.
00:39:34Oh, shit.
00:39:36They thought I couldn't.
00:39:38Ziggy, somebody's turning this place into a whorehouse.
00:39:42How did you find out?
00:39:43Find out?
00:39:44They got a sign outside advertising it.
00:39:47They didn't clear with us.
00:39:48Clear with you?
00:39:49Come on, let's go.
00:39:50Now, remember, big smile and lots of winks when they ask you how it was.
00:39:59Don't you worry about a thing.
00:40:02See you later, girls.
00:40:03Hey!
00:40:03What did I tell you, Ziggy?
00:40:15Look at what's going on.
00:40:17Look at it.
00:40:18Look at it.
00:40:18What's going on?
00:40:19Mr. Booth, listen to me.
00:40:20Nothing really happens inside.
00:40:21It's all a big joke.
00:40:22Ha, ha, ha.
00:40:23Ha, ha.
00:40:23You're turning this place into a tight house tonight, don't you?
00:40:27No, we're not, Mr. Booth.
00:40:29We wouldn't do anything like that.
00:40:30Yeah, well, you see, we had to get even.
00:40:32Those guys, they tore up our merchandise and they killed our turtles.
00:40:35Oh, yeah, oh, yeah.
00:40:38In other words, there's no hanky-fanky going on?
00:40:41Of course not.
00:40:42But everybody's having a good time.
00:40:43In the meanwhile, why don't you take yourself and your sexual fulfillment and get out of
00:40:49here before I call the cops?
00:40:51All right.
00:40:52But in that case, we'd like our rent money back.
00:40:54We'll settle for half.
00:40:55Right, guys?
00:40:56That sounds good enough to me.
00:40:57Out!
00:40:58Out!
00:40:58Out!
00:40:59Okay, we're going.
00:41:00Get out!
00:41:01We're going.
00:41:01We're going.
00:41:02Out!
00:41:02All right, all right.
00:41:13Well, hi, girls.
00:41:28How's your turtles?
00:41:37Hey, you guys.
00:41:38Here, take this.
00:41:39Come on, you.
00:41:40Come on, you.
00:41:41Come on, you.
00:41:41Come on, you.
00:41:43Come here.
00:41:51There we are.
00:41:54Joey, get off.
00:41:56I'm going to stomp your ass.
00:41:57Here I go.
00:42:04Don't get away.
00:42:06Hit a choke.
00:42:06Oh, my God.
00:42:36Oh, no!
00:43:06Oh, God.
00:43:19I mean, things could be worse, I guess.
00:43:22Yeah, levercy is worse.
00:43:23Levercy isn't so bad.
00:43:25How about VD?
00:43:26VD is like Christmas.
00:43:28What if you were dead?
00:43:29Oh, my father would still kill me.
00:43:31What you don't understand is that everything I worked for is ruined.
00:43:34It's destroyed because of that son of a bitch, Roy Davis.
00:43:37You know, he's behind all this.
00:43:39Yeah, but you're never going to prove it.
00:43:40Baby, I don't need to prove it.
00:43:42There's a T-Bird up in San Jose exactly like the one I got.
00:43:45It's for sale.
00:43:46But it's $6,000.
00:43:48I got an idea.
00:43:50Let's steal Roy Davis' machine.
00:43:51I know some guys will sell it right away.
00:43:53And with the money, we can buy the T-Bird in San Jose.
00:43:55Yeah, he deserves it.
00:43:57No, but I don't know about stealing.
00:43:59You know, even from Roy.
00:44:00I don't want to steal from anybody.
00:44:02But on the other hand, we could take it and make Roy a deal.
00:44:07A trade.
00:44:09Swap.
00:44:10Yeah.
00:44:11Roy Davis has the money.
00:44:12Make him pay for that T-Bird.
00:44:14Yeah.
00:44:14Where can we keep it?
00:44:16Leave that to Buddha.
00:44:17I got the perfect place.
00:44:19Wait a minute.
00:44:20We don't even know where the Ferrari is.
00:44:22Dovima can help us find the Ferrari.
00:44:24Yeah, how?
00:44:25By reading our poems?
00:44:26Dovima is a mystic.
00:44:28She can tell the future.
00:44:29I believe in her.
00:44:30Oh, yeah?
00:44:31I wish she'd given us a sneak preview a couple days ago.
00:44:34Has anybody got a better idea?
00:44:36Yeah.
00:44:37Yeah.
00:44:37Anybody care for a carbonated beverage or a doctor what's-his-name?
00:44:55They're not cold.
00:44:56I like to drink them at room temperature.
00:44:58Yeah, but it's pretty warm in here.
00:45:00Yes, it keeps away the evil spirits.
00:45:03You know why we're here?
00:45:04Of course.
00:45:06You wish to kidnap the Ferrari and hold it for ransom so you can swap it for that lost-up T-Bird.
00:45:12My God, Dovima, I never believed.
00:45:14Wow, that is incredible.
00:45:16No one told you anything.
00:45:17Now you believe.
00:45:19Yeah, well, where's the Ferrari?
00:45:21Now, that's a good question.
00:45:23Yeah, but you just said...
00:45:24Dovima might be able to help you with a Ferrari.
00:45:28And she would do that for a friend.
00:45:30And Nancy is a friend.
00:45:32And Susan is a friend of Nancy's, so she would do it for Susan.
00:45:36Well, I'm just as much a friend of Nancy's as Susan is.
00:45:38Then it is not just because you are trying to get into her pants.
00:45:42Get in her pants.
00:45:43Get in her pants.
00:45:46Enough.
00:45:47I think the both of you are full of shit.
00:45:51If I were a young man, I would be trying to get into her pants.
00:45:56The Ferrari, Dovima.
00:45:57It's at Max's repair shop.
00:46:11And as for the keys, they're inside the front door under the calendar.
00:46:16Dovima, I never believed you before, but I've got to say I believe you now.
00:46:22You do, young man?
00:46:23I guess I do, too.
00:46:24Well, it so happens that I brought my Merc wagon into Max's shop today
00:46:28and I saw the Ferrarian where he keeps the keys to all the cars.
00:46:32Oh, Dovima.
00:46:33If I were just ten years younger.
00:46:36Darling.
00:46:37Bulbala.
00:46:37Bulbala.
00:46:39Bulbala.
00:46:42Bulbala.
00:46:51Bulbala.
00:46:58Butch it!
00:46:59dim
00:47:07All right, all right.
00:47:37All right, all right.
00:48:07All right, all right.
00:48:37All right, all right.
00:49:07All right, all right.
00:49:09All right.
00:49:12Nobody's ever made pancakes up here before.
00:49:14How do you like them?
00:49:16If Mr. Booth ever found out about this, he'd drop dead.
00:49:19Well, then you could be the manager.
00:49:20Are you kidding?
00:49:23That guy is as tough as nails.
00:49:25Well, you're tough, too.
00:49:27I like a strong man.
00:49:29You know, I'd make someone a wonderful wife.
00:49:31Where'd you get the dog?
00:49:36He's just a puffy.
00:49:38I call him Ziggy.
00:49:39For Christ's sake, that's my name.
00:49:42Well, that's why I call you Ziggy, too.
00:49:43I, uh, I still can't help wondering, where'd you get all the pretty clothes you wear?
00:49:53Fellas just give them to me because they like me.
00:49:56Well, you like me, too, don't you, Ziggy?
00:49:58I'll wish you...
00:50:00Pancakes are burning.
00:50:03I know.
00:50:04I know.
00:50:05Sit down.
00:50:08I'm a very good cook.
00:50:09I'm going to make Mr. Wright very happy for his whole life.
00:50:14Ta-da.
00:50:21Delicious.
00:50:22Eat your heart out.
00:50:23Oh, Roy.
00:50:31Hey, Hex.
00:50:32Get out of here.
00:50:33Get us some breakfast.
00:50:34Come pick up a ham and egg sandwich.
00:50:37You know, a couple cups of coffee.
00:50:39You want something?
00:50:40You want a little liverwurst on rye or something?
00:50:43Ma'am, make it three or four cups of coffee.
00:50:46Mac, Mac.
00:50:47You don't want anything?
00:50:47Mac, where is my car?
00:50:50That's a hard question to answer.
00:50:53Max.
00:50:55Max!
00:50:58Max!
00:51:00I don't want to hear the rap about having to send to Italy for the special paintbrush.
00:51:05All you have to do is paint a little scratch.
00:51:08Little tiny scratch.
00:51:09No bigger than a dime.
00:51:11And then give the car back to me.
00:51:15Now, how long is that going to take?
00:51:20Roy, now, don't lose your temper.
00:51:24I mean, a little scratch like that is nothing for me.
00:51:27A cakewalk, I can do that like that.
00:51:29Nothing.
00:51:30Peanuts.
00:51:31I mean, that could take maybe a day.
00:51:33A week.
00:51:34A month at the most.
00:51:35But, and I know you want your car perfect.
00:51:38And that's exactly how I'm going to give it to you.
00:51:41Perfect.
00:51:42Perfect.
00:51:43Just as soon as I find it.
00:51:45What?
00:51:48You lost my car?
00:51:51No.
00:51:51You lost my car?
00:51:53You want to hear about the ransom note?
00:51:55What ransom note?
00:51:56Yeah.
00:51:57The kidnappers.
00:51:58The carnappers.
00:51:59Yeah.
00:52:00Yeah.
00:52:01They left this note here.
00:52:03It says,
00:52:05Dear Shithead.
00:52:06Maybe I should have left that out.
00:52:10I know you destroyed my T-Bird.
00:52:13I don't know what that means.
00:52:14Uh, and that's only half of what's going to happen to your Ferrari,
00:52:19unless you replace the T-Bird as it was.
00:52:23I could do that.
00:52:25It's not signed.
00:52:27You want to go to the police?
00:52:29It's up to you.
00:52:29I'm going to take care of this myself.
00:52:34And you, you keep your mouth shut.
00:52:39Right.
00:52:41Absolutely.
00:52:43But, now, I don't want to lose your business.
00:52:46As soon as we get the car back, I'm leaving everything.
00:52:48I'm going to work only on the Ferrari.
00:52:50I'm going to get that thing looking spick and span.
00:52:52I'd drop everything like a hot potato.
00:52:55All set?
00:52:56Something missing.
00:53:00Yeah, it does need something.
00:53:02The chickens!
00:53:06Come on, chicken.
00:53:07Come here, baby.
00:53:08Good chicken.
00:53:10Come on.
00:53:10Come on, chicken.
00:53:12Come on, chicken.
00:53:13Gotcha.
00:53:17The goats!
00:53:18That'll be perfect!
00:53:26Susan, get that dog!
00:53:29Oh, man!
00:53:33Okay, this is great.
00:53:35But, it's just...
00:53:36Hey, kids, come here!
00:53:37Come on, come on!
00:53:45We got it!
00:53:46Come on!
00:53:46Okay!
00:53:47Come on!
00:53:47Come on!
00:53:51Did you get it?
00:53:51Got it!
00:53:56Hello, boys.
00:54:01Uh, hi, Roy.
00:54:02Uh, what's the matter?
00:54:04What's the matter, Roy?
00:54:04You guys, you went and you bent up the T-bird, right?
00:54:08Sure!
00:54:08Forever!
00:54:09Just like you paid us to.
00:54:10Never get those pieces together, Roy.
00:54:12What a mess.
00:54:12Yeah.
00:54:13Very good.
00:54:14Well, those guys, they went and they stole my car.
00:54:16The Ferrari?
00:54:17Ferrari?
00:54:18Yeah, the Ferrari.
00:54:19And they said they're going to do the same number on my car as you did on their car.
00:54:22And you know something, if that's anything happens to my car at all, I'm gonna kill somebody.
00:54:30I don't blame you, Roy, because a car's a precious thing.
00:54:33Now, listen.
00:54:34I want my car back without a scratch on it, and I want you to mess those guys up good.
00:54:40Right.
00:54:41Now.
00:54:41Right.
00:54:42I don't care how you do it, just when.
00:54:44And when is right now.
00:54:46Uh, by the way, uh, the Mexicans gave me this to give to you.
00:54:50What the heck is this?
00:54:51Like that goat, huh?
00:54:59It's funny.
00:55:05Danny, Jesse, how you doing?
00:55:07Do you like to play the cucaracha?
00:55:09Sure.
00:55:15You stink.
00:55:18Everybody's a critic.
00:55:21Hey, that's right.
00:55:23I think a woman should be independent.
00:55:25I absolutely agree.
00:55:28No.
00:55:28You're so obnoxious.
00:55:30You're just like all men.
00:55:31You think I'm kidding.
00:55:38So what are we going to do about the car?
00:55:41I haven't even thought about it.
00:55:42How could I feel so good and have such unbelievable problems?
00:55:45Well, you're just a multifaceted guy.
00:55:48Yeah, sure.
00:55:50You know, we should have met years ago.
00:55:51Yeah, except that in high school, you were the last person I wanted to meet.
00:55:55Yeah?
00:55:56Yeah.
00:55:57So what's different now?
00:55:58You are.
00:55:59You're still stink.
00:56:13You didn't give me a chance to work it out.
00:56:15Come on out.
00:56:32You're the guy that gave me the goddamn pictures.
00:56:34Now, where's the car?
00:56:36Come on, you greasers are all alike.
00:56:38Where is it?
00:56:39Tell me.
00:56:39More urgency.
00:56:58How you going?
00:57:08Stay there.
00:57:09Hey, is everything ready?
00:57:19Ready as we'll ever be.
00:57:21Oh, man, this is the life.
00:57:22Good food, good friends, good food.
00:57:26Take your hands off me.
00:57:30I said, take your hands off me, you lousy greaser.
00:57:33As I was saying, before I was so rudely interrupted.
00:57:40Hi, guys.
00:57:43You let us go.
00:57:44Well, guys, glad you can make it.
00:57:47Yeah.
00:57:48Please accept the hospitality of the Rancho Ismerelda.
00:57:52I can see the man who delivered the message told you where we were.
00:57:54Why don't you just let us go and give us some chicken, huh?
00:57:58You guys are going to be in a lot of trouble.
00:58:00Max knows a guy in San Jose who's got a T-Bird for sale, exactly like the one I had.
00:58:03You remember that?
00:58:04Well, you tell Roy Davis he's got till tomorrow at 3 p.m. to join us at the swap meet.
00:58:09And in front of everybody.
00:58:11With no hard feelings, of course.
00:58:13If he's driving that T-Bird from San Jose, I'll be driving this baby.
00:58:15And we can swap.
00:58:18All right, you tell Davis at 3 p.m. sharp.
00:58:20Get him out of here.
00:58:21Bye, guys.
00:58:23Yoo-hoo!
00:58:25Yeah, I'll get you here.
00:58:26Here's your chicken.
00:58:29Yeah.
00:58:30You and Susan go back to town and tell Ziggy to set up the driving for the big swap.
00:58:35Oh, I can't wait.
00:58:35Well, suppose he wants the money.
00:58:37Money?
00:58:37This will make him famous.
00:58:39Oh.
00:58:39No, he should pay us.
00:58:41Yeah.
00:58:41You've been quiet a long time.
00:58:47Is something bothering you?
00:58:48Sorry.
00:58:50I was just thinking, you know.
00:58:51I know now why all those girls fell for Doug.
00:58:55Do you think we're falling in love with those guys?
00:58:58I don't know.
00:59:00Doug sure kisses good.
00:59:04Oh, I'll be sorry to see it go.
00:59:08Oh, what a beautiful car.
00:59:09I'm sorry I was so mean to you the first time we met.
00:59:13You should take it for one last little ride, don't you think?
00:59:15Couldn't have said it better myself.
00:59:16But we don't hurt it.
00:59:20Because we must admit we are a little slow.
00:59:26Oh, I'm sorry, guys.
00:59:28Do you want to hurt?
00:59:29No, no, you don't.
00:59:30I can get on.
00:59:30I'm sorry, guys.
00:59:31Listen.
00:59:32Maybe we can put the tarp on.
00:59:34And that way, when we drive, we won't hurt it.
00:59:37Oh.
00:59:38Good idea.
00:59:41We'll pop the top, and then we'll get inside and drive to the tarp on.
00:59:45And he'll be our pilot.
00:59:48Jesus, sure is dark in here.
00:59:50Maybe we should put on the headlights.
00:59:52I can't see a damn thing.
00:59:53I can't see.
00:59:54Maybe they need fixing or something.
00:59:56I can't see anything.
00:59:57Well, that's okay.
00:59:57I can see just fine.
00:59:59I will holler orders, and you listen to me.
01:00:02Okay?
01:00:02It's okay.
01:00:03Okay, I got the hang of it.
01:00:05Now, let's take it around the block.
01:00:07Okay.
01:00:07Okay.
01:00:08Oh, wow.
01:00:12Woo!
01:00:15Oh, good.
01:00:16Oh, good.
01:00:18You're doing great.
01:00:23Left now, a little left, right.
01:00:25All right, a little left.
01:00:30Ooh, let's make a second.
01:00:31Something I'm just time to ride.
01:00:35Wait a minute.
01:00:36Wait, I'm sorry.
01:00:37Tell me where to go.
01:00:39Good.
01:00:3924.
01:00:41There.
01:00:42I'd like to go there.
01:00:43Right.
01:00:44Okay, right.
01:00:46Okay, we'll go this way.
01:00:47I'm easy.
01:00:48Woo!
01:00:50Woo!
01:00:51Wee!
01:00:55Wee!
01:00:57Wee!
01:00:59Woo!
01:00:59Woo!
01:01:01Wee!
01:01:02Now, let's go.
01:01:04Let's go, okay?
01:01:09That's what happened.
01:01:10Left, right.
01:01:11Now, now.
01:01:16Close line.
01:01:18Close line.
01:01:18I don't know how they dropped their hands.
01:01:22All right.
01:01:22What's up?
01:01:25Chicken.
01:01:26Chicken.
01:01:26Chicken.
01:01:27Wee all are...
01:01:28Oh, no.
01:01:29Look out.
01:01:29Scoot me back up.
01:01:31Back up.
01:01:31Back up.
01:01:32Goodbye, miss.
01:01:48Come on.
01:01:50Uh-oh, come back for me.
01:01:54Uh-oh, come back for me.
01:01:56Uh-oh, come back for me.
01:02:00Uh-oh, come back for me.
01:02:30Whee!
01:02:32Yahoo!
01:02:33Whee!
01:02:34Make a wish.
01:02:37What are you talking about?
01:02:39I just saw a shooting star, and you can make a wish on a shooting star.
01:02:43So I'm giving you half my wish.
01:02:46Annie, I'm a little disappointed in you.
01:02:50Oh, what for now?
01:02:52I mean, I don't understand it.
01:02:55A nice girl like you with all those guys.
01:02:59What should I do?
01:03:01I don't know.
01:03:03It just seems strange, all those guys here in the drive-in.
01:03:06Isn't it a beautiful night?
01:03:08It isn't as if there were one special guy who was really interested.
01:03:14Mm-hmm.
01:03:15Well, there is a Mr. Right, but he won't say anything.
01:03:18Except, well, I made that wish.
01:03:22What wish?
01:03:23On that thing, Ziggy.
01:03:26You get all your hot dogs and soda for free.
01:03:29You get commissions on all the people you let in who are selling stolen goods and the people you sneak in.
01:03:34Then you sell commercials on the loudspeaker, and you collect rent from me.
01:03:38Yeah, so, so, so what?
01:03:41Ziggy.
01:03:42You're my Mr. Right.
01:03:45Hey, hey, hey, hey, wait a minute.
01:03:47Why don't we...
01:03:49Get married?
01:03:51Are you kidding?
01:03:53Well, you could ask for more money and maybe run this place.
01:03:58We could live here forever.
01:04:01And I love the movies.
01:04:06Annie.
01:04:07Annie, what are you doing?
01:04:11Oh, Annie.
01:04:23Ziggy.
01:04:24Ziggy.
01:04:25Ziggy.
01:04:26Sorry, we're not open for business.
01:04:28But, Ziggy, we've got a great surprise for you.
01:04:31Your drive-in could become world famous overnight.
01:04:35Ziggy, you could have the best swap meet ever tomorrow.
01:04:39Ziggy, you're not listening to us.
01:04:42Annie, keep on doing what you're doing.
01:04:43You'll go away in a second.
01:04:45But, Ziggy, there's money.
01:04:47Lots and lots of money.
01:04:50Annie, will you cut that out?
01:04:52Can't you see these girls aren't talking shit?
01:04:57Ow!
01:05:05Hey, come on, what's going on?
01:05:10Come on!
01:05:13Hey, Ziggy, Ziggy, Ziggy!
01:05:15You picked a hell of a time to go out on strike.
01:05:18The workers have to band together in the war against the bosses.
01:05:21What are you talking about?
01:05:22You're the only work on the whole drive-in.
01:05:25Mr. Booth, I am going to make your drive-in world famous today.
01:05:28You'll see.
01:05:29People will be driving in for miles around to see the swap of the century.
01:05:32And I need more money.
01:05:36What for?
01:05:37I'm going to get married.
01:05:38Married?
01:05:39I work your day and night.
01:05:40I work your day and night.
01:05:41When have you got time to meet a girl?
01:05:42Or is it a girl?
01:05:44Her name is Annie.
01:05:45And she loves the movies.
01:05:47She could work in the concession stand.
01:05:49She could learn to run the projector.
01:05:51She is going to be a big help and a wonderful wife for the assistant manager and partner of the drive-in.
01:05:57I don't know what you're talking about.
01:05:59I'll have my lawyer call you in the morning, partner.
01:06:06Oh, thanks, Mr. Booth.
01:06:08All right!
01:06:09Open for business!
01:06:10So that's what happened.
01:06:13So, what are you assholes trying to tell me?
01:06:17Roy, that's no reason to be abusive.
01:06:19I thought we was friends, Roy.
01:06:20Listen, I'll tell you who my friends are.
01:06:22They're the guys who do what I tell them to do.
01:06:25Now, how can you be my friends?
01:06:27If you have the goddamn car on your goddamn nose and then you lose it!
01:06:31Well, look, this is what happened.
01:06:32There were a hundred Mexican wetbacks.
01:06:34Yeah, like a hundred and a quarter of them, Roy.
01:06:36Right, and they were blocking away and they had guns.
01:06:38Shut up!
01:06:39Now, I'm gonna tell you what you gotta do.
01:06:42Cause I don't wanna go to the swap meet and be embarrassed in front of a thousand people.
01:06:46Now, you listening?
01:06:47Yeah, yeah.
01:06:48If you value my friendship, you're gonna get in your truck.
01:06:51Give me the keys.
01:06:52You're gonna head those guys off.
01:06:53I don't got the keys. Look, you got the keys.
01:06:55And you're gonna get my car back.
01:06:56I gave you the keys before.
01:06:58I got the keys.
01:06:59You got the keys.
01:07:00Maybe you're in the truck.
01:07:02Maybe you're in the truck, please.
01:07:03Well, what are you gonna be doing, Roy?
01:07:04I'm gonna do what you guys are supposed to be doing.
01:07:07I told you.
01:07:08Devima!
01:07:09You're gonna be the first to know.
01:07:10Of course, you're being a mystic in a sea, you probably already know.
01:07:12You're pregnant.
01:07:13Do you think so?
01:07:14No.
01:07:15I'm gonna marry Ziggy.
01:07:16What?
01:07:17Well, I made that my wish.
01:07:18Especially if you're pregnant.
01:07:19I'll see you later, Devima.
01:07:20I've gotta go kiss all my boyfriends.
01:07:21Goodbye.
01:07:22You'll wear out your lips.
01:07:23Give it up to me.
01:07:24What?
01:07:25Well, I made that my wish.
01:07:27Especially if you're pregnant.
01:07:36I'll see you later, Devima.
01:07:38I've got to go kiss all my boyfriends.
01:07:40Goodbye.
01:07:41You'll wear out your lips.
01:07:54I love a scroll, so give me a minute
01:07:57To prove to you what you mean to me.
01:07:59Upsydaisy!
01:08:01Upsydaisy!
01:08:04Upsydaisy!
01:08:05Upsydaisy!
01:08:06Upsydaisy!
01:08:08Upsydaisy!
01:08:09Upsydaisy!
01:08:11Upsydaisy!
01:08:12Upsydaisy!
01:08:13Upsydaisy!
01:08:15Upsydaisy!
01:08:17You get me!
01:08:18I see a man in your future.
01:08:22Yeah?
01:08:23Well, if it's my husband, forget it.
01:08:24No, no, no, no.
01:08:27Not here.
01:08:30Somebody, um, hmm, in authority maybe.
01:08:33Upsydaisy!
01:08:34Upsydaisy!
01:08:35Upsydaisy!
01:08:36Upsydaisy!
01:08:37Upsydaisy!
01:08:38Upsydaisy!
01:08:39Upsydaisy!
01:08:40Hey!
01:08:41Whose hand is this?
01:08:42It's part of my equipment.
01:08:43I got it from a pregnant gypsy.
01:08:45Oh, oh, oh!
01:08:46He dropped something.
01:08:47Upsydaisy!
01:08:48Upsydaisy!
01:08:49Upsydaisy!
01:08:50Upsydaisy!
01:08:51I got it in your palm.
01:08:52Two dollars.
01:08:53Well, think about it.
01:09:03I've been watching you.
01:09:04I've been watching you!
01:09:05I've had my eyes on you all day!
01:09:07Hey, hey, hey!
01:09:08Did you get yours today?
01:09:09This next quarter of an hour comes to you with the compliments of a Mamma Mia's pizzeria.
01:09:22Mmm.
01:09:23I'm having one hour.
01:09:24That's good.
01:09:25Today is the day.
01:09:27You all experience the super-cala-swap-a-fisting event of a lifetime.
01:09:32Stay enough for the swap and be here!
01:09:35Your announcement sounds great, Ziggy.
01:09:38Looks like you're cleaning up.
01:09:40This gig with your newfound boyfriend's better be for real or I am in hot water.
01:09:44Yeah.
01:09:45Deep trouble.
01:09:46Main turbulence.
01:09:47It's critical.
01:09:48Hang on.
01:09:49Ziggy, help us on its way.
01:09:50It'll be okay.
01:09:51Yeah?
01:09:52Yeah.
01:09:53How come I got stomach cramps?
01:09:55Look, why don't you finish this Mamma Mia's pizza?
01:09:58Oh, thanks.
01:09:59Hey, lady!
01:10:00Oh, I remember you.
01:10:01Hey, where are the turtles?
01:10:02Little boy!
01:10:03I wasn't talking to you.
01:10:04I was talking to her.
01:10:05Where are the turtles?
01:10:06We don't have any more turtles, little boy.
01:10:07Hey, is that peach any good?
01:10:08Yeah, you want some?
01:10:09Hey!
01:10:10But you know I'll never let you go, you're...
01:10:11Max!
01:10:12Max!
01:10:13I need a car.
01:10:14I'm gonna get those guys.
01:10:15I need a car.
01:10:16You got a car.
01:10:17You got a car.
01:10:18I need a car.
01:10:19I need a car.
01:10:20You got a car.
01:10:21I need a car.
01:10:22I need a car.
01:10:23I need a car.
01:10:24I need a car.
01:10:25I need a car.
01:10:26I need a car.
01:10:27I need a car.
01:10:28You got a car?
01:10:29I got nothing here that runs except the tow truck.
01:10:30Where are the keys?
01:10:31Here are the keys.
01:10:32Good.
01:10:33No, Roy!
01:10:34You can't...
01:10:35You can't take the tow truck.
01:10:36That's my only means of transportation.
01:10:38No, Roy, my house keys are there.
01:10:41Max!
01:10:42How many times did I ever tell you?
01:10:43Keep your mouth shut.
01:10:45Roy, now listen.
01:10:46No, wait.
01:10:47No, you can't take it.
01:10:52Oh, yeah, you got no regard for another person's property.
01:10:57Okay.
01:10:58They gotta come by here eventually.
01:10:59You sure?
01:11:00Of course I'm sure.
01:11:01It's the only way back to town.
01:11:02Except if they go by way of San Diego.
01:11:04And that's 200 miles further.
01:11:05Part of the what?
01:11:06Ladies, gentlemen, you are about to witness the swap meet of the century.
01:11:13When the Guinness Book of Records enshrines the biggest swap ever made at a drive-in, they
01:11:20will record this day, this very afternoon.
01:11:23where, in the spirit of fair play and good fellowship, a Dino Ferrari, borrowed in a childish prank,
01:11:30will be exchanged for a classic T-bird.
01:11:37That was a pretty good idea to cut a hole in the canvas, Buddha.
01:11:44I know, but still I thought it was more fun when I was on top.
01:11:45Yeah, you bet.
01:11:46Hey, even driving without seeing, I'm a pretty good driver, what'd you say?
01:11:47Yeah, shit.
01:11:48You had Buddha for a periscope.
01:11:49Hey, man, I'm no periscope.
01:11:50You gotta be thin to be a periscope.
01:11:51Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha.
01:11:52Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha.
01:11:53Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha.
01:11:54Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha,
01:11:59That was a pretty good idea to cut a hole in the canvas, Buddha.
01:12:03I know, but still I thought it was more fun when I was on top.
01:12:07Yeah, you bet.
01:12:08Hey, even driving without seeing, I'm a pretty good driver, what'd you say?
01:12:11Yeah, shit. You had Buddha for a periscope.
01:12:14Hey, man, I'm no periscope. You gotta be thin to be a periscope.
01:12:27Oh, come on, you can do better, man.
01:12:28Shut up.
01:12:29Shut up, man. Shut up, man.
01:12:40Touch it, man. Touch it.
01:12:43All right.
01:12:46All right, I'm gonna kill them, dude.
01:12:48Fuck it, hey.
01:12:49Come on, those long shots won't be ringing anyway.
01:12:51God, I'm really worried about the guys.
01:12:53They must have had some trouble or something.
01:12:55Yeah, I know. I was really starting to like those two creeps.
01:12:58Hey, Lou, get out of the way.
01:13:15I'll get them. You get out of the way.
01:13:21Come on, guys. Don't talk to me.
01:13:22Come on, Doug, if you guys are broke, please.
01:13:31I'll get you!
01:13:32Hey, Ziggy, what's going on here?
01:13:34No cars, no driver, no nothing.
01:13:36Gee, Mr. Booth, I can't understand it myself.
01:13:39What are you trying to do? Make an idiot of me?
01:13:43Exactly.
01:13:44Get out of the way.
01:13:46You gotta get some entertainment up there.
01:13:48These people are gonna lynch me.
01:13:49Yeah, sure, Mr. Booth. Anything you say?
01:13:50This car sure isn't any ball of fire, let me tell you.
01:13:53Well, yeah, but what kind of gas did you put in it back at the ranch?
01:13:56It's the only kind we had.
01:13:58Kerosene from a tractor.
01:13:59Oh, shit!
01:14:00Kerosene, you idiot!
01:14:04What are you doing to my car?
01:14:11I'm getting married.
01:14:14Annie, what the hell are you doing?
01:14:16Oh, Ziggy, all my fellas are so happy for me.
01:14:19They're all coming to the wedding.
01:14:20Look, I'm in a terrible hurry.
01:14:22I need your help very badly.
01:14:23Oh, Ziggy.
01:14:24You're worried about those boyfriends of yours.
01:14:39Look at me now.
01:14:41I'll pause the stage.
01:14:43Don't watch me dance.
01:14:44I'm gonna be the way.
01:14:46I'm gonna be the way.
01:14:49Yeah, yeah.
01:14:49I'm gonna be the way.
01:14:50I'm gonna be the way.
01:14:51I'm gonna be the way.
01:14:52Oh, wow, wow.
01:14:53I'm gonna be the way.
01:14:53Oh, wow, wow, wow.
01:14:59Somebody thinks we broke the law.
01:15:02Shit.
01:15:02We got a goddamn brain going on.
01:15:04Turn this baby up.
01:15:05All right.
01:15:06Hang on.
01:15:06All right.
01:15:06Hang on.
01:15:07I'll kill ya!
01:15:37All of my friends, I'll kill ya!
01:15:42I'll kill ya!
01:15:47Yeah!
01:15:50I'll kill ya!
01:15:54I'll kill ya!
01:15:59I'll kill ya!
01:16:06That's enough, please!
01:16:09Come on, it's all done!
01:16:14Look at me!
01:16:19Woo!
01:16:21I'll kill ya!
01:16:25Let it burn!
01:16:28Woo!
01:16:33Woo!
01:16:38Woo!
01:16:40Woo!
01:16:41Woo!
01:16:42Woo!
01:16:44Woo!
01:16:45Dang it!
01:16:47Oh, my god.
01:17:09Ah! Ah!
01:17:34You're not gonna believe this, Captain.
01:17:36Ladies and gentlemen, due to circumstances beyond our control,
01:17:41the world's largest swap meet has been indefinitely postponed.
01:17:45But next week we will definitely have a large supply of domestic foreign auto parts for sale.
01:17:52So if you need parts for a Ferrari, or a Ford pickup, or a T-Bird, or a cop car, come on by!
01:17:59But don't forget to bring your money, honey!
01:18:02Well, folks, you should have been at the wedding.
01:18:06Ten thousand of our closest friends showed up, and we collected enough money to fix up the T-Bird good as new.
01:18:12Roy? Well, Doug, Billy, and Buddha take turns visiting him every Sunday at the mental home.
01:18:19Oh, yeah! On our wedding day, Mr. Booth turned over half the drive-in like he said.
01:18:25Huh, no big deal. It's the least he could do for his only son and his beautiful daughter-in-law.
01:18:32Stay on top of the spot, you hear?
01:18:36If you're looking for that special treasure...
01:18:40If you're looking for that special treasure...
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