- 6 days ago
When they're hired to work at a cheerleading camp for the summer, two lusty college friends prepare for the most spirited three months of their lives. But the squad won't be ready for serious competition without some remedial training
Category
🎥
Short filmTranscript
00:00:00Oh
00:00:08Smell a cheerleader camp in the morning
00:00:30Oh
00:01:00No, no Felice you need to lock a Hy-Vee in the
00:01:13Brit would you be a sweetheart and show Felice a Hy-Vee
00:01:20Ladies this isn't some pillow fighting slumber sleepaway camp for sexually frustrated women you're here to work
00:01:28You're here to
00:01:42Excuse me
00:01:54Hi, excuse me, can you just
00:01:58Oh
00:02:00Tell me which
00:02:02One second
00:02:05Man you really like cheerleading, huh? Please hold on one second
00:02:12Oh
00:02:14My god
00:02:16She's a professional
00:02:21All right, let me see
00:02:23Michael
00:02:25Maintenance, huh?
00:02:26Me too
00:02:27I'll show you your cabin
00:02:28I'll show you your cabin
00:02:30Quick, um, why was that girl not wearing...
00:02:40Oh, that is an excellent question
00:02:42In the immortal words of Mr. Justin Timberlake
00:02:46Wardrobe malfunction
00:02:48But I can see your ass
00:02:49Did you really?
00:02:50Yeah
00:02:51Good, that's what they hope the judges will see
00:02:53You see, Mikey
00:02:55Michael
00:02:56Those young, soft, perfect, thrusting, throbbing...
00:03:01Okay, now you're just saying adjectives
00:03:03This is cheerleader camp, man
00:03:04A place for those girls to come and learn their skills and hone their craft and to compete, ultimately, on a national, albeit regional cable stage for the whole world to see
00:03:14Okay, but she was naked
00:03:16Okay, but she was naked
00:03:17Okay, who judges these things?
00:03:19Um... Judges, I guess
00:03:21Horny old men judges
00:03:23Who find it better to masturbate to these adolescent girls carrying pom-poms in person than to download this shit for free off the internet
00:03:32Okay
00:03:34But why is she naked now? I mean, there's no judges here
00:03:38Oh, wow
00:03:43That guy's pretty good
00:03:45Oh, yeah
00:03:46That's Trey
00:03:47He's the head of the whole janitorial maintenance department
00:03:53So seriously, this is the place to be for the summer
00:03:56It's like Pussy Central
00:03:58All these hot, young girls
00:04:00Away from their boyfriends
00:04:02All sexed up
00:04:03And all the other guys are gay
00:04:05Wait, what?
00:04:06All the guys are gay?
00:04:07All of them, except for me
00:04:09And...
00:04:10What?
00:04:11Oh, my God
00:04:12You're gay
00:04:13What?
00:04:14You're a bone smoker
00:04:16What?
00:04:17Fudge packer, poop pusher, sausage jockey
00:04:20How do you say it in your language?
00:04:21What language?
00:04:22The gay language
00:04:23Look, hey, I'm fine with it
00:04:25I was curious when I was 13
00:04:26Wanted to see what a dick looked like
00:04:28Picked up a few magazines
00:04:29It's cool
00:04:30Alright, well, there is no language
00:04:31I'm not gay
00:04:32Okay
00:04:33Jinkies, I am so sorry
00:04:36Sorry
00:04:37It's alright, dude
00:04:38New meat?
00:04:39You a cheerleader, handsome?
00:04:40Uh...
00:04:41No, uh...
00:04:42Maintenance
00:04:43Then you work well with the stick
00:04:45Jesus
00:04:46Hey, big guy
00:04:47Hi, Sean
00:04:48Oh...
00:04:49My...
00:04:50God
00:04:51Oh, my God
00:04:52I know who you are
00:04:54I...
00:04:55I don't know you
00:04:56Oh, I know you
00:04:57Have you guys met in a bar?
00:04:58Truck stop?
00:04:59Bathroom?
00:05:00Hotel room?
00:05:01YouTube?
00:05:02I gotta go
00:05:03You're the choker
00:05:05Choker
00:05:07Choker?
00:05:08The gay language
00:05:09What's that mean?
00:05:10So the thing is, the past couple years I've been a little heavy
00:05:13But I've been on this new diet plan and I've lost some weight
00:05:16So I really think this is gonna be my year
00:05:18Oh, well, good for you, man
00:05:19Thanks
00:05:20Be careful what you touch, it gets a little sticky in here
00:05:27Alright, this is our room, see?
00:05:30This is our bunk
00:05:35You can take this one
00:05:38I'll take the top
00:05:41Thank goodness
00:05:44My diet aids have arrived
00:05:46I've been waiting all week for these
00:05:49Oh, yeah?
00:05:50Some special fruit or something?
00:05:52Yeah, sort of
00:05:57You, uh, drop your flashlight
00:05:59I think it's broken
00:06:00Boom
00:06:02What is the lax?
00:06:03It's not a real flashlight
00:06:05It's a badge light, see?
00:06:06It's great for my masturbation diet
00:06:11Come on, it's the greatest
00:06:13You know, it's the first diet that I've ever been able to stick to, you know?
00:06:16And I've tried them all
00:06:17I've tried the Atkins
00:06:18And the Zone
00:06:19But, you know, with this one
00:06:20You know, they say
00:06:21That a diet won't work unless you can really stick to it for your whole life
00:06:26And with this one
00:06:27I don't really think I can
00:06:28You're joking, right?
00:06:29I mean, masturbation diet
00:06:31There's no way that can exist
00:06:33Yeah, well, tell that to Dr. Sakamura who invented it
00:06:36I mean, it's huge in Japan
00:06:38It just hasn't caught on in America yet
00:06:40But it will
00:06:41I'm like an early adopter
00:06:46See, every time you spooge, you burn like a hundred calories
00:06:49So, all you have to do is keep the number of spooge sessions over the number of calories you eat in your set
00:06:55Then I can eat pretty much whatever I want
00:06:57See, I've already lost like five pounds
00:06:59Well, I don't know, maybe like three
00:07:02You know, I don't think that's my bunk
00:07:05What?
00:07:06Um, yeah, I'm gonna get another one
00:07:09Uh, it's cool
00:07:11Well, we could stick around
00:07:13Read some magazines
00:07:15Get naked
00:07:16Get naked
00:07:25Oh!
00:07:27Are you okay?
00:07:29Oh!
00:07:30I'm so sorry
00:07:31I'm...
00:07:32Oh my god, are you okay?
00:07:33Me? No, you!
00:07:34I-I tripped-I tripped into you
00:07:37Oh, no, no
00:07:38I'm fine, I really
00:07:40You're really hot
00:07:41What?
00:07:42Sweating
00:07:43Oh
00:07:44I mean, you know, you're really hot there in, you know, in your beaver
00:07:48I mean, you know, you're just bright pink
00:07:51In your, uh, your beaver
00:07:53Costume
00:07:54Costume
00:07:56Okay
00:07:57Uh, let me get you some water
00:07:59No, no, no, I'm fine
00:08:00Really
00:08:01You're really good
00:08:02At falling?
00:08:03No
00:08:04I mean
00:08:05No, backflips
00:08:06I saw you earlier
00:08:07Are you a cheerleader?
00:08:09No
00:08:10Oh
00:08:11You look
00:08:12Really familiar
00:08:13Well, uh...
00:08:16I used to...
00:08:17I used to be a gymnast
00:08:18Did I give you permission to take your mask off, rodent?
00:08:22Move it, move it!
00:08:23You owe me a backflip, I'll let me know
00:08:24Michael
00:08:25Yeah
00:08:26This is an exciting year for cheerleader camp
00:08:28Not only will our final event be aired on sports channel
00:08:39And not only will the winners receive a partial college scholarship
00:08:43But with us today is cheerleader camp's first ever celebrity judge, Miss Charlene Tilton
00:08:56Many years ago, Charlene and I shared a common path
00:08:59We both went to the same high school
00:09:01Although Charlene came some years before me
00:09:04Her legacy carried on
00:09:06And no matter what I did, I could never live up to her reputation
00:09:11Nothing could even compare to the queen Charlene Tilton
00:09:16Although I didn't have the same advantages as she did
00:09:19Daddy's bankroll, the boob job, the nose job, the tummy tuck
00:09:24What was I saying?
00:09:27Charlene made the varsity cheerleading squad
00:09:30And because of her naked persistence
00:09:33And her lust for success
00:09:36So to speak
00:09:37This led her to the glamour of Hollywood
00:09:40And she landed a star role on Dallas
00:09:43And I ended up here
00:09:46I'll be in my cabin getting a drink
00:09:49Miss Charlene Tilton, everyone
00:09:58She looks pissed
00:09:59I'd do her
00:10:00So, well Charlene's obviously a big celebrity
00:10:03And she needs to get her rest
00:10:06Do they all keep the costumes on?
00:10:08The mascots?
00:10:09Uh-huh
00:10:10It's like a law of the mascots
00:10:12Well, how do they eat?
00:10:14With the, you know, the mask on and everything
00:10:16I don't know
00:10:17But that girl is totally giving you the eye
00:10:22How can you tell?
00:10:23Oh, you could tell
00:10:25Just look
00:10:27Dude, did you see that?
00:10:29Right there
00:10:31What?
00:10:32Come on, it's not the eye eye
00:10:33You gotta look, look at the body language
00:10:35Look at that
00:10:37Oh my god
00:10:38Dude, you should totally go talk to her
00:10:40Really?
00:10:41I'm serious
00:10:42Dude, oh my god
00:10:43She's smiling at you
00:10:44Really?
00:10:45You gotta go
00:10:46If you're not going, I'm going
00:10:47I'm leaving
00:10:48I'm gonna go do it
00:10:49I'll go then go
00:10:50Get up and go then
00:10:51I'll go then
00:10:52If you leave then leave
00:10:53Then leave
00:10:54I'm going
00:10:55Hi
00:10:56It's really good to see you
00:11:02It's really good to see you
00:11:04You remember you from before
00:11:06Yeah
00:11:07I hope you know you're feeling better now
00:11:09And uh
00:11:10You know you're uh
00:11:11You're cooling off
00:11:12Because you were really hot
00:11:13Before
00:11:14From running
00:11:15Oh, thank you
00:11:17Well, I'm happy to see you here
00:11:19And obviously we wouldn't be anywhere else
00:11:22Because we're both here
00:11:23And
00:11:24Oh
00:11:25Where are we going?
00:11:26Uh oh
00:11:27Um
00:11:28So, um
00:11:39Why
00:11:40Uh
00:11:41Why
00:11:42Why are we here?
00:11:43Do you want to take the mask off now?
00:11:47No
00:11:48I want to
00:11:49No
00:11:50You don't want to
00:11:51It's uh
00:11:53Very
00:11:54Michael?
00:11:56Oh
00:11:57Oh no
00:11:58Wait
00:11:59Wait
00:12:00Uh
00:12:01Wait
00:12:02Hold on
00:12:03Just
00:12:04Hey sexy
00:12:05What the
00:12:06I thought that was a girl
00:12:08Uh
00:12:09I didn't know
00:12:10How dare you
00:12:11Fooling around out here with this
00:12:13Little man pussy
00:12:14I'm not gay
00:12:15Sure
00:12:16Sure
00:12:17You might be impressing this little monkey ass here
00:12:18I'm not a ass
00:12:19But I will not let you disrespect the squirrel image like that
00:12:22Take it off right now
00:12:24Okay
00:12:25Oh
00:12:26He's naked
00:12:27Just leave it on
00:12:31Look
00:12:32I
00:12:33I swear
00:12:34Okay
00:12:35I didn't know that this was a guy
00:12:36I thought it was
00:12:37No I'm not gay
00:12:38Heh
00:12:39You know what
00:12:40It's okay
00:12:41Don't be ashamed
00:12:42It's cheer camp
00:12:43We're very accepting of gays here
00:12:44Wait just don't
00:12:45Hold on a second
00:12:46Stop stop
00:12:50Bottoms up
00:12:59Well
00:13:01This is gonna cost me like eight sessions
00:13:05Hey man how'd it go?
00:13:07It was a guy
00:13:08It was a guy
00:13:09The mascot
00:13:10It wasn't her
00:13:11It was a squirrel
00:13:12And a guy
00:13:13Right
00:13:14Ugh
00:13:15I was wondering about that
00:13:16Those beaver teeth didn't look quite
00:13:19Beavery
00:13:20Enough
00:13:21You knew this?
00:13:22And you didn't bother to tell me
00:13:23Before I put my hands
00:13:24All over his ass
00:13:25It was a squirrel
00:13:26Over his ass
00:13:27It's the same difference
00:13:28Plus you were already gone by the time I realized
00:13:30You know
00:13:31Wait
00:13:32You touched it?
00:13:33Did it move?
00:13:34Even a little?
00:13:35Stop it
00:13:36Well I mean it kinda figures
00:13:37I mean in the real world
00:13:38You're not exactly a chick magnet
00:13:39What?
00:13:40Hey look man
00:13:41I'd have a fighting chance
00:13:42If you didn't just
00:13:43Make everyone think that I was gay all the time
00:13:45You're doing a fabulous job of that all by yourself
00:13:47You know what?
00:13:48I bet you could never get two really super hot chicks
00:13:51To let you fuck them at the same time
00:13:53What?
00:13:54What?
00:13:55How do we even get to that?
00:13:56That's my goal for the summer
00:13:57Two chicks at the same time
00:13:59369
00:14:00Is a real calorie burner
00:14:02You're joking right?
00:14:04Are you kidding me?
00:14:05Did you not have a childhood?
00:14:07That's like every little boy's fantasy man
00:14:09You know it's like the difference between
00:14:10Pounding it out in a sock
00:14:12Which is you know
00:14:13Like that's okay
00:14:14And like
00:14:15Fucking
00:14:16A watermelon
00:14:17Which is incredible
00:14:20Wait a minute
00:14:21Fucking a watermelon?
00:14:22Are you kidding me?
00:14:23You never stuck your dick in a watermelon?
00:14:24Um
00:14:25You know let me think about that one
00:14:27Nope
00:14:28It's the best
00:14:29You know
00:14:30I used to do it all the time
00:14:31Before my diet aids came
00:14:32You know I was in this very kitchen
00:14:34Fucking away
00:14:35Hey look here's one right now
00:14:36This one's mine
00:14:39Dude
00:14:40Someone can eat that man
00:14:42You know your dick has less germs
00:14:43Than your hands do
00:14:44Oh
00:14:45So that's a little piece of knowledge
00:14:46Alright stallion
00:14:47Let's make a little bet
00:14:48Whoever can get two chicks
00:14:50To let you fuck them at the same time first
00:14:53Wins
00:14:54You know
00:14:55I've never said anything about being a stallion
00:14:57And just so you know
00:14:59I'm fine with one
00:15:00Okay
00:15:01I'm gonna focus on that
00:15:02Huh?
00:15:03Yeah
00:15:04Why not?
00:15:05Whatever
00:15:06One's good
00:15:07Hey guys
00:15:08Uh
00:15:09What's this I hear about a bet?
00:15:10There is no bet
00:15:11Uh
00:15:12Yes
00:15:13There is a bet
00:15:14We're seeing who can get a three way first
00:15:15Uh
00:15:16Just to clarify
00:15:17With two girls
00:15:18Well I'll take a piece of that action
00:15:19What's the winner get?
00:15:20Um
00:15:21Besides having sex with two chicks
00:15:23The glory man
00:15:24The glory
00:15:25Works for me
00:15:26Come on guys
00:15:27Let's go clean up
00:15:28Come on
00:15:29Oh fine
00:15:30Mr. Watermelon
00:15:31Great
00:15:41No
00:15:42No
00:15:43Wait
00:15:44No don't eat that
00:15:45What?
00:15:46What's wrong?
00:15:47Uh
00:15:48It's my butt right?
00:15:49It's too big
00:15:50Italia keeps telling me
00:15:51I cannot eat anything with sugar
00:15:53No no no
00:15:54You're
00:15:55It's not your butt
00:15:56Your butt is uh
00:15:57Perfect
00:15:58I mean
00:15:59Um
00:16:00Yeah
00:16:01Oh
00:16:02I'm sure you tell all the mascots that
00:16:03Oh
00:16:04I
00:16:05I didn't mean it
00:16:06Oh
00:16:07No
00:16:08Um
00:16:09Listen
00:16:10About that
00:16:11Look I know it would look like it
00:16:12But
00:16:13Newbie
00:16:14I need you to take out the trash okay?
00:16:17Anyway
00:16:18Um
00:16:19Trey is so cute
00:16:20Am I right?
00:16:21What?
00:16:22I
00:16:23I
00:16:32Let's hear it for the Beavers
00:16:35The Beavers
00:16:36I'm gonna wake ya!
00:17:07They've gotten really great this year.
00:17:12They might actually even win.
00:17:14Wins the number two spot you mean.
00:17:20Check the microphone!
00:17:36All right, so here's the basic method to changing light bulbs.
00:17:44It's really a science, right?
00:17:46You climb up in the rafters, and you change the light bulb.
00:17:49But once you're there, you stay up there as long as you can
00:17:51so the girls forget about you.
00:17:53And then it's like a porno.
00:17:55Seriously, they start touching each other?
00:17:57Right.
00:17:58I'm serious! It's great!
00:17:59It's especially helpful for those little, you know,
00:18:02deposits to the spank bank, which, I don't know about you,
00:18:05but my count is running a little low.
00:18:07With almost ten withdrawals a day, if you know what I mean.
00:18:10Masturbation.
00:18:12Sure.
00:18:14Wait, don't you wanna knock first?
00:18:16Okay.
00:18:17Damn it! It's empty.
00:18:30Okay.
00:18:32All right.
00:18:33This is it.
00:18:34This is where the magic happens.
00:18:38All right.
00:18:39All right.
00:18:41And a new one.
00:18:46Okay, let's go.
00:18:49This is coming up.
00:18:53Holy pussy.
00:18:56They're coming in to take a shower.
00:18:57What?
00:18:58Shower.
00:18:59Let's go.
00:19:00I think I pulled a hammy.
00:19:02Are you betting us?
00:19:03You should go see Mrs. Simmons after your shower
00:19:05and ask for the...
00:19:06Talk to them after practice.
00:19:08Yeah.
00:19:09Everything is okay, as they said,
00:19:10as long as you get the insurance from the school.
00:19:12It's open.
00:19:13Great.
00:19:14I'll get the registration paper.
00:19:17Ladies, can I talk to you for a minute?
00:19:19I'm concerned about a little weight gain.
00:19:26Oh, Britt.
00:19:27I promise.
00:19:28It's just PMS.
00:19:29Yeah, Britt.
00:19:30Me too.
00:19:31It's PMS.
00:19:32Definitely.
00:19:33Well, it does seem like your boobs are a little bigger.
00:19:36Let me see.
00:19:37Yeah.
00:19:38Yeah, they're definitely bigger.
00:19:41Yeah, they're huge.
00:19:43I mean, there must be like a D now.
00:19:46I know.
00:19:48What are you guys doing?
00:19:49We're just comparing breast sizes.
00:19:51Oh, shit.
00:19:52What are you doing here?
00:19:53You purrs?
00:19:54I'm just changing my mind.
00:19:55Oh, you stupid chicken.
00:19:56I'm bad at this.
00:19:57Yeah!
00:19:58Purrs?
00:19:59Seriously?
00:20:00Hey, man.
00:20:01That was awesome.
00:20:02I must have burned like 400 calories with that.
00:20:04I love European women.
00:20:05Hey, I'm gonna head back to the cabin for round two.
00:20:07Okay.
00:20:08I'm gonna head back to the cabin for round two.
00:20:10Okay.
00:20:11I'm gonna head back to the cabin for round two.
00:20:13Okay.
00:20:14I'm gonna head back to the cabin for round two.
00:20:16Okay.
00:20:17I'm gonna head back to the cabin for round two.
00:20:20Okay.
00:20:21I didn't order this.
00:20:33Crap.
00:20:34My parents sent it.
00:20:38It's a pummel horse.
00:20:40Your parents want you to be gay?
00:20:42No.
00:20:43It's, um, it's for gymnastics.
00:20:46They're just thinking, um, never mind.
00:20:50Uh, what do we got under here?
00:20:51Yeah, see, there's space for something under there.
00:20:53I could put, like, a couple, you know, dildos or something under there.
00:20:56Yeah.
00:20:57The tickler.
00:20:58You know?
00:20:59And slide across it.
00:21:00Hop on.
00:21:01Pump through a couple of times.
00:21:03It's got a bone on it and everything.
00:21:04I just really want you to be gay.
00:21:06And maybe put, I like that.
00:21:09Put the vag light here.
00:21:10That's good.
00:21:11And pump.
00:21:12And maybe somebody tickle my butthole.
00:21:13Yeah.
00:21:14It's got really, really good.
00:21:15Seriously.
00:21:16Yeah.
00:21:17And do you get really sweaty on this?
00:21:18I bet you get really sweaty.
00:21:19I would slip off.
00:21:20See, we're gonna need to get some high grip tape so I don't slip off.
00:21:23Because I would get going.
00:21:24And if I get going with the lube and shit, I'm gonna fly right off if I'm not locked onto
00:21:29it.
00:21:30Time to wake up and sneak back into your own box.
00:21:35It's time to cheer!
00:21:51The city's sidewalk breaks in town.
00:21:55Another day away.
00:21:58I never thought I'd follow you.
00:22:00All right.
00:22:01So the trick is just turn this on like this and...
00:22:06Turn off the sprinklers!
00:22:13So what's the use?
00:22:15There must be a better place.
00:22:18Is anything with you a beer commercial?
00:22:20Ah, yes.
00:22:23Come on, you guys.
00:22:25Keep going!
00:22:26You're out of mind.
00:22:27There must be a better place.
00:22:29He's gonna pick her up.
00:22:30He's gonna pick her up.
00:22:31Here it comes.
00:22:32Here it comes.
00:22:33Oh.
00:22:34You're out of sight, not out of mind.
00:22:39Turn off the sprinklers!
00:22:40Oh.
00:22:41Oh.
00:22:42Sorry!
00:22:43You guys.
00:22:44No, no, no, no.
00:22:45You're a dick.
00:22:46Let's have a big round of applause for the game.
00:22:48Oh.
00:22:49Oh.
00:22:50Oh.
00:22:51Oh.
00:22:52Oh.
00:22:53Oh.
00:22:54Oh.
00:22:55Oh.
00:22:56Oh.
00:22:57Oh.
00:22:58Oh.
00:22:59Oh.
00:23:00Oh.
00:23:01Oh.
00:23:02Oh.
00:23:03Oh.
00:23:04Oh.
00:23:05Oh.
00:23:06Oh.
00:23:07Oh.
00:23:08Oh.
00:23:09Oh.
00:23:10Oh.
00:23:11Oh.
00:23:12Oh.
00:23:13Oh.
00:23:14Oh.
00:23:15Oh.
00:23:16Oh.
00:23:17Oh.
00:23:18Oh.
00:23:19Oh.
00:23:20Oh.
00:23:21Oh.
00:23:22Oh.
00:23:23Oh.
00:23:24Oh.
00:23:25Oh.
00:23:26Oh.
00:23:27Oh.
00:23:28Oh.
00:23:29Oh.
00:23:30Oh.
00:23:31Oh.
00:23:32Oh.
00:23:33Oh.
00:23:34Oh.
00:23:35Oh.
00:23:36Oh.
00:23:37Oh, I forgot to tell you, they joined my team.
00:24:04Oh, oh! Ladies, please, stop it!
00:24:08Or you're both suspended. Now, what happened?
00:24:12Natalia and the boys just wanted to be on the winning team for once, that's all.
00:24:16There is no rule against them joining our team.
00:24:18But they cannot do that, can they?
00:24:21Well, I'm gonna have to have a look, but something tells me...
00:24:23If they are injured at this camp, they can join any team they want.
00:24:26My father's lawyer checked the bylaws. It's perfectly legit.
00:24:30But what are we gonna do then?
00:24:33Well, if you can't get more members to perform, I'm sorry, but you're not gonna be able to compete.
00:24:38I mean, you can always stay here at camp and work on your skills, but...
00:24:42But then we're not gonna be eligible for the scholarship!
00:24:45Aw, did the skanky beaver want to go to college?
00:24:50Dude, it just really sucks for them, man.
00:24:56You know, I bet those girls are really vulnerable right now.
00:25:00I bet we could convince them to have a three-way with us.
00:25:03I don't want to have sex with you and a girl.
00:25:06Oh, dude, will you stop being so frickin' faggy?
00:25:09I don't want to have sex with you. I want to have sex with them.
00:25:12And you might be there. Strictly for moral support.
00:25:16Hold on.
00:25:18Hey. Hey, hi. Uh, I never got your name, uh, earlier.
00:25:23It doesn't matter. I'm leaving.
00:25:27It's Sophie.
00:25:29Sophie.
00:25:31Look, Mrs. Simmons is looking for more cheerleaders. Why don't you just do that?
00:25:35I can't. I can't do what they do.
00:25:37You could do a double backflip with a 40-pound beaver on your back.
00:25:40Fifty pounds.
00:25:42But I'm... I'm not cheerleading material.
00:25:46It would be really great.
00:25:49I just... I look better inside a costume, not outside of it.
00:25:53If you know what I mean.
00:25:55Not really.
00:25:56Look, do you want that scholarship?
00:25:59Forget it. How'd the girls are leaving tonight, the rest of us in the morning?
00:26:02Do you want the scholarship or not?
00:26:05Hey, Mikey, come on. We gotta go fix that window.
00:26:13And get that fuckin' trash, too.
00:26:16Dude, just forget her, okay? She's one girl.
00:26:28One girl who will never, ever let you fuck her while she's going down on another chick.
00:26:34I mean, that's just the facts. That's the way it is.
00:26:36But here's the best part.
00:26:38There are a million girls here who would love to do that for you.
00:26:41You know, if she had her own squad,
00:26:45she'd be able to realize just how good she really is.
00:26:48Yeah, right.
00:26:49So now all we need to do is find a place with a bunch of limber, athletic girls
00:26:53who look good in practically no clothes,
00:26:55who are willing to dance around on stage in front of a bunch of people.
00:26:59If such a place existed, I'd be there all the time.
00:27:11I don't know. This doesn't just be cool. It's gonna be awesome, alright?
00:27:16Look, dude, we're not going into the back and fucking you with some stupid...
00:27:25No, no, no, it's not like that.
00:27:26Real cheerleaders for a...
00:27:28It's a real cheerleading competition, okay?
00:27:31And there's gonna be college scholarships for the winners.
00:27:34What's that?
00:27:35College?
00:27:36College.
00:27:37Well, whoopity-doo.
00:27:38Lot of good that's gonna do us here.
00:27:40Shit.
00:27:48Hey!
00:27:49Hey, hey, hey!
00:27:51Michael.
00:27:52Um, Michael.
00:27:53Did you say something about a scholarship?
00:27:55Yeah.
00:27:56Um...
00:27:57It's, uh...
00:27:58You know...
00:27:59Partial...
00:28:00Scholarship.
00:28:01That's...
00:28:02Oh!
00:28:03Ah, guys!
00:28:04Oh!
00:28:09Whoa!
00:28:10Shit, Sean!
00:28:11What are you doing here?
00:28:13Right.
00:28:14That's why you're all naked walking down El Paso de Gabo.
00:28:17Michael?
00:28:18What?
00:28:19Michael?
00:28:21Is that you?
00:28:22Yeah.
00:28:23What are you doing here?
00:28:24Uh...
00:28:25Skinny dipping.
00:28:28Here?
00:28:29Now?
00:28:30Sure.
00:28:31It's the perfect time of night.
00:28:33Join me?
00:28:34Um...
00:28:35Well...
00:28:36Mmm...
00:28:37Cold stuff.
00:28:38You're gay, so...
00:28:39Okay.
00:28:40What?
00:28:45Stop!
00:28:46What?
00:28:47Are you okay?
00:28:48Fine.
00:28:49Yeah.
00:28:50It's good.
00:28:54Stop!
00:28:55Am I making you nervous?
00:28:56Nope.
00:28:57Nope.
00:28:58Not at all.
00:28:59Okay.
00:29:00Wow.
00:29:01Stop!
00:29:02Stop!
00:29:03Michael!
00:29:04What is wrong?
00:29:05Um...
00:29:06Listen, sister.
00:29:07He's with me.
00:29:08Oh!
00:29:09Oh!
00:29:10No!
00:29:11I'm not.
00:29:12Yes, you are!
00:29:13It's not what it looks like.
00:29:14Wait, that...
00:29:15Is this?
00:29:16Look.
00:29:17I'm not with you.
00:29:18What are you talking about?
00:29:19Sorry.
00:29:20Um...
00:29:21I'm leaving tomorrow and...
00:29:22You two make a great couple.
00:29:23No!
00:29:24No!
00:29:25We don't make a lovely couple.
00:29:26Not at...
00:29:27Wait!
00:29:28No!
00:29:29We don't make you!
00:29:30What the fuck is your problem?
00:29:31We...
00:29:32Fuck!
00:29:33Oh!
00:29:34Oh!
00:29:35Miss Tilton?
00:29:36Yeah?
00:29:37Nothing.
00:29:38It's great you're doing this.
00:29:39I'm thrilled.
00:29:40Oh!
00:29:41Oh!
00:29:42Miss Tilton?
00:29:43Yeah?
00:29:44Nothing.
00:29:45It's great you're doing this.
00:29:46I'm thrilled.
00:29:47What are you, 12?
00:29:48You don't even know who I am.
00:29:49Oh!
00:29:50Miss Tilton?
00:29:51Yeah?
00:29:52Nothing.
00:29:53It's great you're doing this.
00:29:54I'm thrilled.
00:29:55What are you, 12?
00:29:56You don't even know who I am.
00:29:57Oh!
00:29:58You're wrong.
00:29:59You're an inspiration to these girls.
00:30:01Really?
00:30:02Well, you've probably seen me on reruns of Happy Days,
00:30:04and...
00:30:05Oh!
00:30:06You're wrong.
00:30:07You're an inspiration to these girls.
00:30:10Really?
00:30:11Oh!
00:30:12Well, you've probably seen me on reruns of Happy Days,
00:30:16married with children,
00:30:18or maybe even my starring role in Problem Child 2.
00:30:21Classics.
00:30:23More importantly,
00:30:24you were a varsity cheerleader that made something of herself.
00:30:27Oh!
00:30:28Thanks!
00:30:31I'm sorry about what happened to your team today.
00:30:34That Brittany is a piece of work, isn't she?
00:30:37Hey, but listen,
00:30:39you're just gonna have to toughen up there, kid.
00:30:42That kind of thing is gonna plague you your whole life.
00:30:45Aw.
00:30:46So, are you gonna quit?
00:30:50Do I have a choice?
00:30:52No.
00:30:53You should quit.
00:30:55Hey, Brittany's ruled this world.
00:30:59You know...
00:31:00Uh...
00:31:01Thanks?
00:31:02Sure.
00:31:03I still got it.
00:31:08Yeah.
00:31:09It's too bad we can't share.
00:31:10It sucks.
00:31:11Yeah, I know.
00:31:12What can you do about it?
00:31:13Michael?
00:31:14Hi.
00:31:15Aren't you going to say goodbye?
00:31:16Uh...
00:31:17Look.
00:31:18About last night...
00:31:19Uh...
00:31:20Oh, no, no.
00:31:21It's not like that.
00:31:22No.
00:31:23No, no, no, no, no, no.
00:31:24I, um...
00:31:25It's...
00:31:26I interrupted Sean while he was giving Michael head.
00:31:27No!
00:31:28That's...
00:31:29You know what?
00:31:30I give up.
00:31:31Um...
00:31:32Have a great summer, okay?
00:31:35Uh...
00:31:36You're welcome.
00:31:37No, no, no.
00:31:38Are you going to say goodbye?
00:31:39Uh...
00:31:40Look.
00:31:41About last night...
00:31:42Uh...
00:31:43Oh, no, no.
00:31:44It's not like that.
00:31:46No.
00:31:47No, no, no, no, no.
00:31:49I, um...
00:31:50It's...
00:31:51I interrupted Sean while he was giving Michael head.
00:31:52No.
00:31:53That's...
00:31:54You know what?
00:31:56I give up.
00:31:57Um...
00:31:59Have a great summer, okay?
00:32:00Okay, uh, you're a really great girl.
00:32:07And I'm sorry again about last night.
00:32:10I'm so embarrassed.
00:32:21Have a good day.
00:32:22Okay, all right.
00:32:31Michael!
00:32:32Liz!
00:32:33And our welcoming committee.
00:32:35You know them?
00:32:40Who are you?
00:32:42We're the beavers, Tiny Tits.
00:32:45Okay, girls, hit it.
00:32:47Rim.
00:32:48R-I-M.
00:32:51Through the rim.
00:32:54Sink it in!
00:32:55Sink it in!
00:32:56Sink it in!
00:32:57Sink it in!
00:32:58Sink it in!
00:32:59Sink it in!
00:33:00Sink it in!
00:33:01Sink it in!
00:33:02Sink it in!
00:33:03Sink it in!
00:33:04Sink it in!
00:33:05Sink it in!
00:33:06Granted, they're not real cheerleaders yet, but they move really, really well.
00:33:11They want to perform really well on TV, and you can train them to do that.
00:33:19Are they even enrolled in school?
00:33:21Actually, we thought of that.
00:33:23They're going to enroll in the online Phoenician University, the same one that Andy's in.
00:33:27And then they're just going to drop out when the competition's over.
00:33:31Um, okay.
00:33:33That's...
00:33:35Thank you so much.
00:33:37But the competition's in six days, and I...
00:33:41I'm just a master.
00:33:42Ooh!
00:33:43Look at the new beavers!
00:33:48I guess somebody should have told them it's a cheerleading competition, not a freak show.
00:33:54Oh!
00:33:55Look how sad!
00:33:57They think that they can do this with all these freaks and sluts.
00:34:03Oh!
00:34:04Look, now the mascots joining the team.
00:34:07Oh!
00:34:08I'm not a mascot.
00:34:10I'm a cheerleader.
00:34:12Oh.
00:34:13Yeah?
00:34:15We'll see.
00:34:16Yeah, we'll see you at the competition.
00:34:18Did anyone hear what I just said?
00:34:26It was like I was in a trance, and I was like...
00:34:31You're a cheerleader!
00:34:33We're all cheerleaders!
00:34:35Go beavers!
00:34:41Hey, hey!
00:34:43It's time to fight!
00:34:44Everybody yell it green and white!
00:34:46Hey, hey!
00:34:47It's time to fight!
00:34:48Everybody yell it green and white!
00:34:51Hey, hey!
00:34:52It's time to fight!
00:34:53Cinnamon, could you maybe take out your gun?
00:34:57You're not supposed to be...
00:34:58Oh, no, no, no.
00:34:59I need it to keep count with the cheer.
00:35:01See?
00:35:04Hey, hey!
00:35:05It's time to fight!
00:35:07Everybody yell it green and white!
00:35:10You know, I really hope they can pull it off.
00:35:12Looks like they're about to pull something off.
00:35:14Much better.
00:35:15And could you maybe take off your heels this time?
00:35:19And...
00:35:20Oh, your shirt.
00:35:21Could you just close it up just a little bit?
00:35:24Much better.
00:35:25And make sure you have some really tight Vs and great facial.
00:35:29Everybody yell it green and white!
00:35:31Hey, hey!
00:35:32It's time to fight!
00:35:33Everybody yell it green and white!
00:35:35What are you doing?
00:35:37That's my V. Nice and tight.
00:35:40That is a vagina, and I like it.
00:35:42Yeah.
00:35:43And what are you doing with your face right now?
00:35:46You said facials, right?
00:35:48I don't know.
00:35:52It's just not working.
00:35:53I mean, they have some skills, but I cannot bring us together.
00:36:05We have no discipline.
00:36:07I can't give it to them.
00:36:10You used to be a gymnast.
00:36:12Why don't you join the squad?
00:36:15You could really use some muscle.
00:36:17Uh...
00:36:19I can't.
00:36:20You know, I just...
00:36:22I'm sorry, you know?
00:36:25What's he doing?
00:36:27What, that?
00:36:28That's, uh...
00:36:29That's just some Eastern meditation thing.
00:36:32Did you see that?
00:36:34I think that's the kind of discipline we need for this team.
00:36:38That?
00:36:39No, no, no, no.
00:36:40That's kickboxing.
00:36:41That's totally different than cheerleading.
00:36:43I don't think so.
00:36:45All sports have the same basic ideas in common.
00:36:49I think...
00:36:50I'm gonna go talk to him.
00:36:51Okay.
00:36:52I'll talk to you later.
00:36:58Whew!
00:36:59It's a good workout.
00:37:01Must have burned 126 calories with that one.
00:37:12Oh, hey.
00:37:14You know, I think she's gonna ask Trey to join the team.
00:37:18Oh, yikes.
00:37:21Come on, man.
00:37:23We gotta go clean up the kitchen anyway.
00:37:29You know, maybe it won't lead to anything with them.
00:37:31Maybe they really are just...
00:37:33disgusting cheerleader business.
00:37:35Right?
00:37:36Yeah, right.
00:37:37Ugh.
00:37:38It's so good.
00:37:39I'm about ready to find out of my share.
00:37:40Your share?
00:37:41Mmm.
00:37:42My cap's never last as easy as it's too fattening.
00:37:44Really?
00:37:45Well, anytime you want, I got the keys to the kingdom.
00:37:47I can get you anything you'd like.
00:37:48Feliz, come on.
00:37:49We gotta go.
00:37:50We both have practice tonight.
00:37:51Let's go.
00:37:52Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.
00:37:53Okay.
00:37:54We could hang out later maybe.
00:37:55Oh, no, it's not good.
00:37:56It's not good.
00:37:57I'm about ready to find out of my share.
00:38:00Mmm.
00:38:01Your share?
00:38:02My cap's never last as easy as it's too fattening.
00:38:05Really?
00:38:06Yeah.
00:38:07I'm about ready to go.
00:38:08I'm about to go.
00:38:09I'm going to take a minute.
00:38:10And have to go.
00:38:11Oh, you're going to go.
00:38:12Let's go.
00:38:13Over there.
00:38:14Let's go.
00:38:15Carly, wait, wait.
00:38:16Wait, wait.
00:38:17Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.
00:38:19Okay.
00:38:20We can hang out later maybe.
00:38:21Oh, no.
00:38:22It's not good plans with Ronda.
00:38:24Also, maybe we could both come.
00:38:27If you give us the one thing that we really, really love.
00:38:30What is the one thing that you really, really love?
00:38:33Chocolates. With the penis.
00:38:36No way.
00:38:38Yes, the chocolate-covered penis.
00:38:41Just so I'm getting this right, you want penis?
00:38:44Chocolate-covered penis?
00:38:48Yes, the warm chocolate covering all those big, big nuts.
00:38:53Nuts, too. Okay, I could do that.
00:38:57What could be better?
00:38:59I don't think anything could be better than that.
00:39:02All right, well, I will see you tonight at 9 then.
00:39:12Come on, man, you can come.
00:39:14Gonna be a hot night.
00:39:16No way. Not interested.
00:39:19What are you gonna do, sit around here and pine while I go and win the bet?
00:39:22There is no bet.
00:39:23Yes, there is, and I'm gonna win because you, son, are afraid to perform.
00:39:32Great.
00:39:33Stepping up to the pommel horse is Mike Coker.
00:39:42What is he doing?
00:39:43He looks like a deer in headlights.
00:39:47Don't worry, son.
00:39:48Don't do just fine.
00:39:49Just remember, stay above your head.
00:39:50Don't worry, son.
00:39:51Don't do just fine.
00:39:52Just remember, stay above your head.
00:39:53Don't worry, son.
00:39:54Don't do just fine.
00:39:55Just make sure you stay above your head.
00:40:05He looks like a deer in headlights.
00:40:11Don't worry, son, don't you just pine?
00:40:15Just remember, stay above and ...
00:40:17Just make sure you stay above and not ...
00:40:19Remember, I don't take anyone below and not.
00:40:23I don't take anyone below and not.
00:40:27Don't worry, son.
00:40:29Remember, stay above and not.
00:40:31Don't worry, son.
00:40:33Don't worry, son.
00:40:34Well, I've never seen anything like this.
00:40:37I don't think anyone will be well enough.
00:41:04Time for some chocolate-covered penis.
00:41:19Oh, that does feel good.
00:41:25Shit.
00:41:29Oh, yeah, this is it.
00:41:31This is the one.
00:41:34Hey.
00:41:38Is this some kind of joke?
00:41:40Are you trying to make fun of her because she is black?
00:41:43Yeah.
00:41:44No, no, no, no.
00:41:45She said that you said that you'd like this.
00:41:47Like what?
00:41:48To see a fat white dude in blackface?
00:41:51Now, why in the hell would I like that?
00:41:53Chocolate-covered penis.
00:41:55Oh.
00:41:56Oh, I said chocolate-covered penis.
00:41:59Right, nuts, penis, chocolate.
00:42:02No, I said peanuts.
00:42:04P-E-A-N-U-C-F.
00:42:05Peanuts.
00:42:06Nuts.
00:42:07Peanuts?
00:42:08Yes, of course.
00:42:09Peanuts.
00:42:10Oh.
00:42:11Peanuts.
00:42:12Peanuts.
00:42:13Oh.
00:42:14Peanuts.
00:42:15Yes, it's peanuts.
00:42:16Wow.
00:42:17This is funny, right?
00:42:19I mean, so what?
00:42:21I guess a three-way would be out of the question?
00:42:25Let's go.
00:42:26No?
00:42:27No?
00:42:28All right, well...
00:42:29Since I'm here...
00:42:31God, look at that.
00:42:33Looks like he's taking over the whole team.
00:42:35Yeah.
00:42:36Looks like they're all his groupies or something.
00:42:38All right, I can't go.
00:42:39Ugh.
00:42:40Ha!
00:42:41Ha!
00:42:42Ha!
00:42:43Ha!
00:42:44Ha!
00:42:45Ha!
00:42:46Ha!
00:42:47Ha!
00:42:48Ha!
00:42:49Ha!
00:42:50Ha!
00:42:51Ha!
00:42:52Ha!
00:42:53Ha!
00:42:54Ha!
00:42:55Ha!
00:42:56Ha!
00:42:57Ha!
00:42:58Ha!
00:42:59Ha!
00:43:00Ha!
00:43:01Ha!
00:43:02Ha!
00:43:03Ha!
00:43:04That is that party tonight.
00:43:05You should meet up with and you should explain yourself.
00:43:06No, it's too late for that, man.
00:43:08It's not going to work.
00:43:09Too late?
00:43:10Yes.
00:43:11Is that what Garfield did when he wanted the lasagna?
00:43:13He just did it.
00:43:14He went after it and he got it.
00:43:16And he didn't let that son of a bitch get in his way.
00:43:18He ate the lasagna to the last drop.
00:43:20And then what did he do?
00:43:21He went and he got more lasagna because he's a greedy motherfucker
00:43:24and that's what you need to be.
00:43:26You need to be a greedy son of a bitch.
00:43:28Ha!
00:43:31Ha!
00:43:32Oh!
00:43:33well that sucked we're not strong enough you'll probably lose that's not a pep talk so sue me
00:44:03damn it those beavers are getting good again it's just trey and that one stripper girl
00:44:27she's a natural how does she even have any time to practice during the day doesn't
00:44:33she have to be at work or something she doesn't actually work in the daytime i mean
00:44:39yes she does definitely
00:44:45excuse me where is the entertainment right there or you can go in the back room yeah no
00:44:55we need something a little more personal but not that personal oh i'm sorry you have to come back
00:44:59after five for that we usually don't get requests for lap dances this early i would like to speak
00:45:03to the owner of this establishment just wait right here
00:45:07so what can i do for you everything
00:45:16yeah hi look we don't have any lap dances right now but you're welcome to go in the back
00:45:25no no that's not what we want i happen to work for a very large entertainment conglomerate we're
00:45:30gonna have a lot of executives here next week for the cheerleading competition you may have heard of
00:45:34it yeah i heard of it okay well there's nothing these execs like more than a mid-afternoon stress
00:45:40reducing lap dance but if you don't have early entertainment then i guess we'll just have to
00:45:44take our business no no wait wait wait wait a second no i got girls okay i can reschedule
00:45:49them i can have them here earlier of course you can no come on please they work for me okay
00:45:55i'll have the girls here you bring all the execs you want oh i will
00:46:01you know what's cool about these is they actually talk
00:46:12fuck me hard
00:46:15fuck me hard in the ass you big stud
00:46:19fuck me hard
00:46:21and watch you can also program them to say things michael i want you to fuck me i want
00:46:32you to fuck me in my tight round butthole you're a whole big boy
00:46:48pretty great right so well you're more than welcome to borrow any of these while i'm gone
00:46:54gone at the party where i'm going to find some strippers and win the bet
00:46:59there there is no bet there most definitely is a bet you can deny it all you want but just
00:47:06you remember if you're too afraid to compete well then you've already lost
00:47:09too afraid to compete just remember stay above nine i don't date anyone below a nine nine
00:47:22oh i want to take forensic science
00:47:34what's that it's like csi new york or miami vegas nice
00:47:40the original
00:47:41according to native american lore the beaver is actually a force to be reckoned with
00:47:54in matters of business and combat and not a vagina
00:47:58i'm gonna go get another beer
00:48:02okay
00:48:03oh hey andy did you enroll all the girls in classes
00:48:07mm-hmm
00:48:09hey is michael here michael no he's really upset about you two
00:48:16who me and trey
00:48:17yeah he's just sitting in our cabin just drinking beer and you know what
00:48:21he doesn't even drink beer
00:48:23really
00:48:24yeah you know what you should do is you should go and talk to him
00:48:28okay i will
00:48:29you should you should go talk to him
00:48:32all right i'll go talk to him
00:48:34great
00:48:34michael
00:48:56hi
00:48:58can i come in for a minute
00:49:00so i was talking to andy and he said
00:49:08what
00:49:09he said that you were jealous of me and trey
00:49:13he said that
00:49:14it's not true
00:49:16no
00:49:17it is
00:49:20i mean
00:49:21kinda
00:49:23sorta
00:49:24michael
00:49:25the thing is
00:49:27the thing is
00:49:31the butt
00:49:32but what
00:49:32i think there's a bug on that can
00:49:34oh
00:49:35please
00:49:37so you were saying
00:49:39um
00:49:40you're a great guy
00:49:42but the thing is
00:49:44trey
00:49:44yeah
00:49:45he's not gay
00:49:47i know from experience
00:49:50really
00:49:52well
00:49:54kinda
00:49:54wait wait hold on
00:49:57you think that i
00:49:59like
00:50:00trey
00:50:01well
00:50:02yeah
00:50:03that's why you're jealous
00:50:04cause you're in love with trey
00:50:07no
00:50:08no
00:50:08not
00:50:09not
00:50:09not at all
00:50:10no
00:50:10god
00:50:11trey just wants to have a three-way
00:50:13not with me
00:50:14uh
00:50:14with two women
00:50:15i can't explain all the things
00:50:17the crazy
00:50:18things
00:50:18the way that they've looked
00:50:20they're all
00:50:21misunderstandings
00:50:23all of them
00:50:25wait
00:50:25what
00:50:26i think you've
00:50:29you know
00:50:29had enough tonight
00:50:30but i haven't had any
00:50:31wow
00:50:44i'm from the midwest
00:50:46so what are you gonna say about
00:50:49michael
00:50:51i want you to fuck me
00:50:54what
00:50:54i want you to fuck me
00:50:56in my tight
00:50:57row
00:50:58it's a
00:51:00row
00:51:00big boy
00:51:02oh my god
00:51:04wait wait wait
00:51:05wait no no no
00:51:06stop stop
00:51:07no it's not what it looks like
00:51:08i'm sorry
00:51:09i'm from the midwest
00:51:10we don't
00:51:11no no no no
00:51:12stop
00:51:12come back
00:51:13hey
00:51:24is everything alright
00:51:27why don't we get out of here
00:51:32okay
00:51:32you should go
00:51:58or not
00:52:01maybe we should have some
00:52:04real team bonding time
00:52:06hey uh
00:52:07there's enough room in this dam
00:52:09for one more beaver
00:52:10ew
00:52:11yeah
00:52:12no
00:52:12michael was right about you
00:52:15i totally would have done it
00:52:24hey brit
00:52:28trey
00:52:29we need to talk
00:52:32how would you feel about
00:52:34going to the kickboxing competition
00:52:37in las vegas
00:52:38tomorrow morning
00:52:40good night andy
00:52:58i'll see
00:53:00i'll see
00:53:26So as you know, there are only two days left until the final competition.
00:53:54Beavers, let's see what you got.
00:53:56Where's Trey?
00:54:00Aww, are you looking for your little maintenance boy?
00:54:05I'm sorry to tell you, but he left you.
00:54:08For good.
00:54:09Trey flew home for a kickboxing competition.
00:54:12It's just too bad you can't keep a squad together.
00:54:17Okay, we're going to do this without Trey.
00:54:19What? Why? How can we?
00:54:21We can do it. What I need, um, desire.
00:54:24Don't, don't do that jump.
00:54:26Cinnamon and Sweetie, you guys have to do the set.
00:54:28You're the only two that can do the lift.
00:54:30Shit, it's Michael.
00:54:32Bliss, don't answer that.
00:54:33Hello?
00:54:34Bliss, I need you girls to come back to the club.
00:54:37Right now, no excuses.
00:54:39Uh-huh.
00:54:40Uh, no way.
00:54:41No.
00:54:42We have rehearsal.
00:54:43Yeah?
00:54:44And you have a job to do.
00:54:45And if you want to keep it, you'll come back to the club right now.
00:54:48Listen, Daz, you owe me a shitload of money, and I've been nice enough to let you work it off.
00:54:54So, get your skanky little asses back here now.
00:55:01Sophie, we have to go.
00:55:04I'm sorry.
00:55:05You're hopeless.
00:55:06You guys, we're really sorry.
00:55:08Please.
00:55:09We have jobs.
00:55:10We have jobs, you guys.
00:55:11I'm sorry.
00:55:12No, no, no.
00:55:13Come on.
00:55:14Sophie, wait, stop.
00:55:23What?
00:55:24It's over.
00:55:25It should have been over a long time ago.
00:55:27Don't say that.
00:55:29You were great with the squad.
00:55:31You can't quit now.
00:55:32You've got to make this happen.
00:55:33Isn't that your thing?
00:55:34Your beaver thing?
00:55:35Take charge.
00:55:36Adapt.
00:55:37Overcome.
00:55:38That would be a lot more believable coming from someone who hadn't completely given up on themselves.
00:55:42You wouldn't even join the squad because of some past flub.
00:55:47You saw the video?
00:55:48Yeah.
00:55:49You froze.
00:55:50Big deal.
00:55:51It happens.
00:55:52Okay, it was a little worse than that, I think.
00:55:54I didn't just freeze.
00:55:55I choked.
00:55:57You know, I just saw all those judges, with their little black numbers, waiting to judge me.
00:56:04Waiting to determine my life, my scholarship, and everything.
00:56:16I just didn't, I didn't want to let everyone down.
00:56:19Right.
00:56:21So, you're going to use that as an excuse to keep hating yourself?
00:56:25So, I guess all that talk was just that then, huh?
00:56:30Talk.
00:56:32It's too late anyway.
00:56:33Bye, Michael.
00:56:37Bye.
00:56:52With every inch I lose
00:56:56And boy, I feel so lost
00:57:02And every tone in the sound
00:57:09Steams up in that cloud
00:57:12It spirals through your ears
00:57:18It's all I have for now
00:57:22Sorry it didn't work out, Sophie
00:57:25You really did try your best
00:57:27And you can be proud about that
00:57:28Bliss, Desire, Marco needs you in the back room
00:57:39Right now
00:57:39Look at this
00:57:43When you are found in your home
00:57:47Want a ride?
00:58:02Want a cigarette?
00:58:04Miss Tolton, I don't know if I'm doing the right thing
00:58:07Look, I hope you're not expecting a pep talk here or anything
00:58:12Because this is just a ride
00:58:14Right
00:58:15Are you okay?
00:58:19I'm fine
00:58:20Oh, sweet Jesus
00:58:22Do you want me to pull over and you can get out and walk?
00:58:27Honey, life is lemonade
00:58:30And sometimes you just gotta count your chickens for a rainy day
00:58:34You really suck at pep talks
00:58:36Thank you
00:58:37Look
00:58:39I've always been beautiful
00:58:42So I can't really relate to what you're going through
00:58:45Sorry, no can't help
00:58:48Oh my God
00:58:51I get it now
00:58:53What?
00:58:54You're Miss Simmons Britt
00:58:56What?
00:58:57And you got the boob job, the nose, the hair
00:59:00You bested your best friends to get ahead
00:59:02I did not get a boob job and have my nose done
00:59:05Look, we both tried out for varsity
00:59:08She just wasn't good enough
00:59:09I am not her grit
00:59:12Yes, you are
00:59:14And you're back here because
00:59:15Because I'm getting paid a huge personal appearance fee
00:59:19Or because you felt bad all these years
00:59:22Okay, Dr. Freud
00:59:23You know, sometimes a penis is just a penis
00:59:27I don't know what that means
00:59:30Come on
00:59:31I'm gonna get you back to camp
00:59:33Maybe you should slow down a little bit
00:59:57Ready?
01:00:16Okay
01:00:17What the hell are they doing out there?
01:00:20Attack
01:00:20Overcome
01:00:21Overcome
01:00:22Go Beavers
01:00:24Not quitting
01:00:25Well, how gay
01:00:27Well, I gotta get over to Mrs. Simmons' cabin and fix her faucet
01:00:31Attack
01:00:31Overcome
01:00:32Go Beavers
01:00:35Take time
01:00:36Attack
01:00:37Overcome
01:00:38Go Beavers
01:00:40Take time
01:00:42Attack
01:00:43Overcome
01:00:44Go Beavers
01:00:47I'm gonna go talk to him
01:01:00Good luck
01:01:02Oh, no
01:01:08No
01:01:09No, no, no, no
01:01:10It's not what you think
01:01:11It's not what it looks like
01:01:13I swear
01:01:13Look
01:01:14I want to join the squad
01:01:16But what about your fear of
01:01:19Freezing up
01:01:20Of choking
01:01:21Well, I can't promise anything
01:01:23But
01:01:23I want to do it
01:01:25Thank you, Michael
01:01:28Okay
01:01:39Okay, you guys
01:01:39I'm gonna go give my college registration to Mrs. Simmons
01:01:41Thanks
01:01:48Hi
01:01:53Fuck off
01:01:54Mr. Simmons
01:02:00I'm here to fix the faucets
01:02:03Hmm
01:02:24Mrs. Simmons
01:02:37I have my registration
01:02:42She's not here
01:02:44Probably just leave it by the computer
01:02:46So you're back to doing the whole fake college thing?
01:02:52Wait, wait, wait
01:02:52You know what?
01:02:53I'm almost done here
01:02:54Maybe afterwards we could
01:02:56I don't know
01:02:57Do something
01:02:57Something?
01:02:59Yeah
01:03:00You know, like
01:03:01I don't know
01:03:01Talk about college
01:03:02Or
01:03:03Have a three-way
01:03:04Maybe some mental sex
01:03:05Wow
01:03:06The fact that she would even say that
01:03:08Is disgusting
01:03:10And you seem like a cool guy
01:03:12Like you're funny
01:03:13You're smart
01:03:14Too bad you're a giant idiot
01:03:17Just
01:03:17Like a blowjob
01:03:18I mean, that's nothing
01:03:19Wow
01:03:20Nothing?
01:03:21Yeah
01:03:21Yeah, I mean
01:03:22You're a stripper
01:03:23That's gonna be like blowing your nose
01:03:24Okay
01:03:26What?
01:03:28Let's go
01:03:29I love strippers
01:03:44I love strippers
01:03:46Alright, no funny stuff
01:03:54Alright, no funny stuff
01:03:54I'm not so sure I feel about all this
01:04:10You're not gonna use that on me
01:04:13Are you?
01:04:14I'm not going to
01:04:16What are you doing?
01:04:19Hey, where are you going?
01:04:22Hang tight, big boy
01:04:24What?
01:04:24What are you doing?
01:04:25What?
01:04:26Where are you going?
01:04:26Hi, Liz, honey
01:04:36Sorry I'm late
01:04:37Oh, no worries
01:04:38I left my registration papers
01:04:40For you near your computer
01:04:41Oh, perfect
01:04:41I've been waiting for those
01:04:42And
01:04:43Andy's waiting for you inside
01:04:46Good
01:04:46He's supposed to come out
01:04:47And fix my broken sink
01:04:48Listen, that
01:04:52Oh, Andy
01:04:57Mrs. Simmons
01:04:59I can explain
01:05:00This is not what it looks like
01:05:02Oh, I think it's exactly
01:05:03What it looks like
01:05:04Holy rooster tits
01:05:10Oh
01:05:15When are you in there?
01:05:25That wouldn't happen to be
01:05:26Bliss, would it?
01:05:28No, Andy
01:05:29It wouldn't be
01:05:30It's my mother
01:05:31Your mother
01:05:33Your impossibly much, much, much
01:05:38Younger looking mother
01:05:39Hi, Mommy
01:05:45There's a scene
01:05:49Well
01:05:51He's a little chubbier
01:05:53Than I'm used to
01:05:54But
01:05:54Let's get it on
01:05:57Oh, God
01:05:58I don't know how
01:06:20We're going to do this
01:06:21Go, guys
01:06:44Looking good
01:06:45Back to one, guys
01:07:10Come on
01:07:11Okay, here we go
01:07:12Wait, I won the bet
01:07:23Bye, Andy
01:07:27You just got to let it happen
01:07:33No, you know
01:07:33Oh, shit
01:07:38Ow
01:07:38Ow
01:07:39Ow
01:07:39Ow
01:07:40Sorry about that
01:07:42I...
01:08:12Hi, Joshua
01:08:17Um, it's Michael
01:08:22I've been waiting for you
01:08:24Um, you know
01:08:25I've got to get to sleep
01:08:26Uh, I've got to get up early
01:08:28Right, right
01:08:31For the competition tomorrow
01:08:32I know
01:08:33And I also know
01:08:35That it can't really matter
01:08:36That much to you
01:08:37Because you're an athlete
01:08:38A real athlete
01:08:39Uh, good night
01:08:43I know that you screwed up
01:08:46Your last gymnastics meet
01:08:47And you lost your scholarship
01:08:48You disappointed your parents
01:08:51Everyone, really
01:08:52But it seems like
01:08:55You've got some of your
01:08:55Mental mojo back
01:08:56And now that you do
01:08:58Your coach is willing
01:08:59To take you back
01:09:00You can have your scholarship
01:09:01The full ride
01:09:02What?
01:09:05How could you know that?
01:09:06These are tickets out tonight
01:09:11How...
01:09:12How did you do this?
01:09:14Well, as you may know
01:09:16My father's a bigwig
01:09:17In sports TV
01:09:18He has a lot of connections
01:09:20So that scholarship is yours
01:09:23As long as you leave tonight
01:09:25In about...
01:09:29An hour
01:09:30And we're here for
01:09:46Sports Channel's
01:09:4612th annual
01:09:47College Cheer Competition
01:09:48Where regional college teams
01:09:50Are competing for the honor
01:09:51Of best in the state
01:09:52And I got my eye on those beavers
01:09:54They are one sexy group of girls
01:09:55Has anyone seen Michael?
01:10:11I checked backstage
01:10:12He wasn't there
01:10:13I don't know where he is
01:10:14Next up
01:10:16The Skrulls
01:10:19They're amazing
01:10:45They're good
01:10:46I like a girl
01:10:53With the three eyes
01:10:54You can make it up
01:10:55You can look inside
01:10:56I like a girl
01:10:56With the body
01:10:57You can't stop
01:10:57The kind of girl
01:10:58Maybe one
01:10:58I like the house
01:10:59Then you look sexy
01:11:00In a little mini shirt
01:11:01With a man
01:11:01Your boots
01:11:02And a white shirt
01:11:02Let me head down
01:11:03I'm really strolling around
01:11:04I take you in the bathroom
01:11:05Hit the turn around
01:11:06I like what you do to me
01:11:07We scream my neck
01:11:08Like you do to me
01:11:09You know this here
01:11:09You better work that thing
01:11:10Work that thing
01:11:11You'll do that thing
01:11:12Make a barrel
01:11:13And hold on a basketball
01:11:14Three off the rocks
01:11:15You can draw me
01:11:16You can do whatever
01:11:17You want yourself
01:11:18Yeah, let me know what's up
01:11:19Come on
01:11:19Get up
01:11:26Let's go get down
01:11:27Say goodbye
01:11:28He's gonna be here
01:11:42He's gonna make it, guys
01:11:43We're gonna take a brief little break
01:11:45Then we'll be back
01:11:47With more cheering
01:11:48Oh, are you talking about Michael?
01:11:50Your little maintenance man?
01:11:53No, he's not coming
01:11:55He's planning on going back to school
01:11:57To get his gymnastics scholarship
01:11:59Well, at least that's what he told me
01:12:02When I was in his bed last night
01:12:03Please, do you really expect us to believe that?
01:12:07Cheer trash?
01:12:08Well, otherwise
01:12:09How would I know he has this
01:12:11Cute little mole right here?
01:12:18Sorry, girls
01:12:19Cheetahs, we're up
01:12:21We're gonna have to forfeit
01:12:29I can't believe he would do this to me
01:12:32That's just how men are, honey
01:12:34Let's have the cheetahs
01:12:36On stage, please
01:12:38Here come the cheetahs
01:12:44Give it to me
01:12:50Give it to me
01:12:51Yeah
01:12:52Give it to me
01:12:56We got it
01:13:07You know, that one judge looks kind of familiar.
01:13:37Look, they're amazing. We probably wouldn't have made it anyway.
01:14:07Let's hear it for the cheetahs!
01:14:25This you? Listen, I wanted you to know you were right about what I did to Mrs. Simmons,
01:14:34and I'm gonna talk to her, so thank you.
01:14:38I am sorry you're gonna lose. You got a lot of heart there, kid.
01:14:42Up next, the Beavers!
01:14:45It's me, I gotta go.
01:14:48Beavers to the stage, please! Beavers to the stage!
01:14:54Let's just do this.
01:14:57Sophie!
01:15:00Oh, Britt turned off my power, and I overslept, but I'm here.
01:15:09I thought you were going back to school for your scholarship.
01:15:13No, I could never do that to the SWAT. It's all about trust.
01:15:18Are you ready?
01:15:22Yeah.
01:15:27Let's do that!
01:15:31Here come the Beavers!
01:15:35Let's go, Beavers!
01:15:41Come, Beavers!
01:15:52Oh!
01:15:54Let me take a job!
01:15:56Hey!
01:15:57Oh!
01:15:58Let me take a job!
01:15:59Nick!
01:16:00Nick!
01:16:01Baby, hey, hey, bye
01:16:03Cause I win
01:16:05You're leaving over me
01:16:07To your direction
01:16:09My body's open now
01:16:11You're in action
01:16:13You're just a sweet spot
01:16:15Oh, baby, there's no sanctions
01:16:18Don't stop, you're on my mind
01:16:21Let's go
01:16:22We got
01:16:25We got
01:16:27We got
01:16:33We got
01:16:35We got
01:16:37We got
01:16:39We got
01:16:41We got
01:16:43We got
01:16:45We got
01:16:47We got
01:16:49We got
01:16:51We got
01:16:53We got
01:16:55We got
01:16:57We got a lot of love
01:17:02We got a lot of love
01:17:07We got a lot of love
01:17:27Please wait while the judges make their final decisions.
01:17:52And the results are in.
01:17:57Third place goes to...
01:17:59The Squirrels!
01:18:03And second place goes to...
01:18:06The Cheetahs!
01:18:09The winners of the Beavers!
01:18:18Alright!
01:18:28My Third Place is major than and départ.
01:18:36You dodged me!
01:18:38Hi, my LD!
01:18:44I know you voted for me
01:18:45And to thank you, I'm gonna give you one of those extra social love dances that you like so much.
01:18:53You like those extra special lap dances that you like so much with all the extras.
01:18:59Daddy?
01:19:02You mean, you didn't vote for her squad?
01:19:05But I'm her daughter.
01:19:07Get over it, Britt.
01:19:09It's time to grow up.
01:19:11Stop being such a daddy's girl.
01:19:15Besides, your daddy has another baby to worry about now.
01:19:18Oh, oh my, oh my God, ew.
01:19:23Charlene?
01:19:30Oh, hi, honey.
01:19:33Hey, we can't let the Brittneys of the world win all the time, right?
01:19:36Thank you for helping us win.
01:19:40Miss Simmons, Gwen!
01:19:41Gwen, I really need to talk to you.
01:19:50Hey, Mikey, look who won the bet.
01:19:53Yep, this guy.
01:19:56All right, shall we, ladies?
01:19:58Please.
01:20:01Wow.
01:20:02You are really hot.
01:20:25In my...
01:20:26Oh, fuck me.
01:20:35Fuck me so hard.
01:20:38Oh, you big boy.
01:20:40Oh, you big boy.
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