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Transcript
00:00The End
00:30Good afternoon, sport fans.
00:43The winners of today's finals will be crowned king of sports and queen of sports.
00:50Competing in the men's division is that all-around, all-American flash from Brooklyn, gorgeous Gorillowicz.
01:00He will compete against that super-speed demon, that atomic flash, that jet-propelled thunderbolt from Cucamonga, Droopy Poodle.
01:13Hello.
01:17An added award to the king of sports will be a kiss from the queen of sports.
01:30And now, may the best man win, fair and square.
01:39First event, 100-yard dash.
01:42On your mark, get set.
01:49Go!
01:50You know what?
01:54You cheated.
01:58Next event, 200-yard freestyle swim.
02:14Oh!
02:15Next event, the sack race.
02:32When you want, get set, go!
02:33Next event, punching the bag.
02:53Next event, punching the bag.
02:59Oh!
02:59Next event, wrestling.
03:25Next event, wrestling.
03:25Next event, wrestling.
03:29Next event, log rolling.
03:59Skeet shooting.
04:11Skeet shooting.
04:12Next event, skeet shooting.
04:13Next event, skeet shooting.
04:13Next event, golf.
04:34Quiet, please, while the contestant is driving.
04:37Quiet. Quiet, please.
04:43And now the final event, the mile run once around the track.
04:55Contestants must follow the white line.
05:13How do you do?
05:38Madame Jésus will analyze your handwriting.
05:41One moment, please.
05:43Write your name here, and I will tell you whether you wean or lose.
05:59You lose.
06:00And now, ladies and gentlemen, it gives me great pleasure to crown the athlete who has made a clean sweep of every event, the new king of sports, hey, Doc.
06:14The new king of sports, gorgeous Gorillowicz.
06:24The king will now receive a kiss from the lovely queen of sports.
06:29Oh, kiss from the king.
06:47No!
06:48No!
06:49No!
06:50No!
06:51No!
06:52No!
06:53No!
06:54No!
06:55You know what?
06:58Cheaters never win.
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