- 2 hours ago
Three dangerous men, one heart — who will she choose?
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Short filmTranscript
00:00:00Ellen musk the only woman on the forbes 30 under 30 list arrives at Atlanta today what a business
00:00:12tycoon is doing here in Georgia a forgotten stage no one knows Angela my next-door neighbor still
00:00:19selling your hippie junk here if your mother-in-law sees she's gonna throw a big fit again your mother
00:00:27mom is right about you what's the point of watching the news all day about these mongrels if you can't
00:00:32even apply to your penniless self and how do you know that this is none of my all right everybody
00:00:39get out we got an important guest coming you deaf I said pack up and scram I paid this off here already
00:00:54and if you want me to leave then fine but you have to compensate for today's losses I want to say that
00:01:01again you know who's visiting today Ellen freaking musk one of the richest people in the world Ellen
00:01:10musk of course a hick like you probably never heard of her just know that you can't afford to piss her
00:01:16off really Ellen musk is flying all the way to Atlanta just to come to some flea market you don't think
00:01:24that she could be coming to see me coming to see you all right you know what I'll play your game if she
00:01:34does it so much as give you a glance I'll I'll eat dirt deal Ellen musk get to the flea market within 10
00:01:52minutes or else you're fired
00:02:04prepare the limo miss law cart requires us immediately oh you're 10 minutes you're so messed up good hope
00:02:27we don't want your pants five four three two one Ellen uh I mean miss musk Ellen uh I mean uh I'm sorry
00:02:46that I uh sorry to frighten you how's my boss bitch kicking ass girlfriend so how do you like
00:02:56she's my boss and I prefer business partner or best friend no way well no no no I'm sorry for
00:03:14defending your boss no I won't do it again all right that's enough we're not tyrants here
00:03:22sir I found Angela Lockhart
00:03:31you mean Angela Lockhart
00:03:38my runaway pride
00:03:40you made me lose one million dollars in just one game of poker who are you
00:03:47where is she Atlanta and you were right it was secretly her propping up Alan Musk my clever
00:03:57bride I will chase you to the end of the world if I have to
00:04:00Max prep the jet I'm heading to Atlanta
00:04:07Dr. Wilson he's having sterling's on the move he's headed to Atlanta Atlanta the game is afoot I'm going
00:04:18wait Dr. Wilson the Prince of Bhutan needs your medical attention he can wait I need to pick up my bride
00:04:24ãn
00:04:33Hamilton I'm reporting louis
00:04:37devin sterling and Shane Wilson are headed to Atlanta Atlanta where is that whatever prepare my war plate
00:04:43Where is that?
00:04:45Whatever! Prepare my war plate!
00:04:47Dosu going after my fiance.
00:04:49This is war.
00:05:07I've secretly allowed your husband, Jared Cooper, to win the bid on the Maple Plaza project like you asked me to.
00:05:13Thank you so much, Ellen. This is going to be the best anniversary gift ever.
00:05:18That project is worth billions. He can finally take his company public.
00:05:22But, Angela, my boss, I don't understand why you do so much for him behind the scenes without ever revealing your true identity.
00:05:32Without your backing, no offense, but he's nothing without you.
00:05:37Well, three years ago...
00:05:43You saved me.
00:05:48You saved me.
00:06:00You saved me.
00:06:04He saved me, and I fell in love with him instantly.
00:06:08I didn't want to reveal my true identity because I didn't want him to feel the pressure of being with a billionaire heiress.
00:06:14But now, with this contract, I feel like we'll be on more equal footing and then I can finally come out to the public.
00:06:22So that's why you have me secretly helping him.
00:06:25I'm sure he'll be moved when he finds out.
00:06:28But why work at the flea market?
00:06:32Are you disguising yourself to test him?
00:06:36Well, these exotic spices are incredibly rare and cost a fortune to find.
00:06:42Plus, I get to make the best dishes for my hubby and his mom.
00:06:46You seem happy being a housewife.
00:06:52Where the hell are you?
00:06:53Don't tell me you were selling junk at the flea market again.
00:06:56Get home stacked.
00:06:58It's a big day today.
00:07:01That was...
00:07:02My mother-in-law, Carol, she judges me because she thinks I come from a lower-class family.
00:07:08But she's gonna be ecstatic tonight when I finally come out and tell her who I really am.
00:07:14You know, she even remembered our third year anniversary.
00:07:22Please spend more time with my son.
00:07:26Hi, I'm home.
00:07:28I have a big announcement I have to make.
00:07:31Finally, you're back.
00:07:32Now sign the divorce papers.
00:07:34Divorce papers.
00:07:39Is this some sort of misunderstanding, Mom?
00:07:42Oh, God.
00:07:44Don't call me Mom again.
00:07:46We're ending that relationship.
00:07:48Just look at you.
00:07:49Dirt all over.
00:07:51You're selling the title of Mrs. Cooper.
00:07:53You don't deserve my son.
00:07:54You're way below his league.
00:07:58I'm below his league?
00:07:59That's right.
00:08:01You are.
00:08:02Jared is signing a hundred-billion-dollar contract tomorrow with THE Ellen Musk.
00:08:09And then his company's going public.
00:08:11That's how much he's accomplished in three years.
00:08:14But you?
00:08:15You're still just a stinky, hippie peddler.
00:08:19Jared's like the king in the clouds.
00:08:22And you...
00:08:23You...
00:08:25Will always just be a pawn.
00:08:28Like dirt...
00:08:30On our shoes.
00:08:32Dirt on your shoes?
00:08:34But...
00:08:35Ellen Musk works for me.
00:08:37Ha!
00:08:38You're delusional.
00:08:39You will never upgrade to a queen.
00:08:42How dare you compare yourself to the real deal here.
00:08:45Resorting to lies.
00:08:46Definitely not good enough for Jared.
00:08:48And...
00:08:49Who are you to come into my house and meddle with my family matters?
00:08:56You're nothing but a pathetic excuse for a wife.
00:09:02Jared deserves a queen like Kaylee.
00:09:04Not a low-life dirtbag.
00:09:05Enough!
00:09:06Jared...
00:09:08I knew you wouldn't divorce me.
00:09:10But I am.
00:09:12Don't fight it, Angela.
00:09:14Here's 500k.
00:09:16You'll never make this much as a hippie peddler selling spices.
00:09:20Now sign the papers, take your check, and leave.
00:09:21Don't embarrass yourself further.
00:09:23I've done so much.
00:09:25I've done so much.
00:09:27I've done so much.
00:09:29I've done so much.
00:09:31I've done so much.
00:09:32I've done so much for you these past three years.
00:09:36Did that not mean anything to you?
00:09:39I didn't expect you to be so greedy.
00:09:42Fine.
00:09:44Here's another 200k.
00:09:46500k is too much for her already.
00:09:49She's done nothing.
00:09:51Hasn't even contributed a grandchild.
00:09:54She just sells cheap grass all day.
00:09:57Is that really how much I'm worth to all of you?
00:09:59I took care of both of you these past three years.
00:10:04You think we can't just hire a maid to cook for us or something?
00:10:10And she wouldn't embarrass us with that permanent stench.
00:10:14A hippie peddler becoming the wife of a CEO?
00:10:18What a joke.
00:10:19If you actually love my son, you'll sign the damn divorce papers already.
00:10:25And leave!
00:10:28You really think that Jared would have gotten that Maple Plaza bid without me?
00:10:33Let alone taking the company public?
00:10:35I did everything for you, Jared.
00:10:39Now you take credit for my son's success?
00:10:42It's all my work!
00:10:49Baby.
00:10:51We're gonna be late for the auction if we keep letting this psycho stall us.
00:10:57You did say you would win me Princess Diana's tiara, didn't you?
00:11:02So, she's the reason for the divorce.
00:11:05She's worth more than you, Angela.
00:11:10Fine.
00:11:12I'll sign it.
00:11:14But don't regret it.
00:11:17Regret?
00:11:19Don't know who I am.
00:11:21Yeah, a cockroach that only knows how to crawl her way into a married man's bed.
00:11:24I'm Eric Vanderbilt's only daughter.
00:11:29Jared winning the bid on Maple Plaza was because of my dad.
00:11:35Because he's business partners with Elon Musk.
00:11:38It's part of the power that I have as an elite.
00:11:43You can't do shit because you're poor.
00:11:46Social stratum matters.
00:11:49Yeah, social stratum does matter.
00:11:51And the Coopers are beneath me.
00:11:55And you really think Elon Musk would come to Atlanta if it weren't for me?
00:12:00Ha!
00:12:02You're delusional.
00:12:04Now sign the papers and scram!
00:12:09You owe me.
00:12:11You dirty bitch.
00:12:13You sicken me.
00:12:14You hit me.
00:12:24Now sign the papers, take your check, and get the fuck out!
00:12:27I don't need your penny money.
00:12:45Come on.
00:12:47We're finished.
00:12:48You don't want the money that's your loss.
00:12:51Your check is just pennies to me.
00:12:54But, I would like my ring back.
00:12:57Oh.
00:12:58Have fun on your economy flight while I catch a ride on my private helicopter out of here.
00:13:17And I'm way out of your league.
00:13:20Isn't that the Winston blue diamond ring?
00:13:28It's worth tens of millions of dollars.
00:13:31Oh, it's probably just cheap glass.
00:13:35Something she found at the flea market.
00:13:37You're right.
00:13:38She could never afford anything so expensive.
00:13:43Congrats, Jared Vuvu, on getting rid of that dirt bag.
00:13:47Oh, my dad says there's going to be a secret big shot financial tycoon at tomorrow's summit.
00:13:55Bigger big shot than Elon Musk?
00:13:58Yeah.
00:14:00And nobody's met them, but I can introduce you.
00:14:03Everything's thanks to you, babe.
00:14:17Angela, Mr. Vanderbilt, the richest man in Georgia, wants to schedule a meeting before the bidding.
00:14:27Vanderbilt?
00:14:28Yeah, he's actually CEO of one of our companies. Basically our employee.
00:14:32Okay, I'll meet about the summit tomorrow. It's fine.
00:14:35You're still going to the summit tomorrow? But you and Jared Cooper are already divorced.
00:14:39That's exactly why I'm going.
00:14:47Angela Lockhart. I finally found you.
00:15:07Who is he?
00:15:09That. That's Devin Sterling.
00:15:11He's number one on Forbes 30 under 30 list, an early investor of crypto, CEO of Sterling Enterprises.
00:15:18Rumor has that he's worth trillions.
00:15:21And he's your fiancé.
00:15:24What? What? My fiancé?
00:15:28The one and only.
00:15:30So, after running away and leaving me single for three years,
00:15:36have you figured out how you're going to make it up to me yet?
00:15:39Babe.
00:15:41That tiara looks perfect on you.
00:15:51What is she doing here?
00:15:56You skank. My son just divorced you yesterday and you're already hooking up with another man?
00:16:05Divorced?
00:16:07That's right. So, I guess this was never meant to be Mr...
00:16:13Sterling.
00:16:15Devon Sterling.
00:16:16So, she has to hide her marital status to find another man.
00:16:21Guess she's not just a forsaken woman. She's also a stinky, penniless whore.
00:16:26How dare you insult my boss like that.
00:16:32Who the fuck are you, bitch?
00:16:35Do you know who I am?
00:16:37They don't know who you are.
00:16:40You hide it well.
00:16:42X-Team!
00:16:44Teach these fools a lesson.
00:16:46Teach these fools a lesson.
00:16:49Sir, you were kind of in a rush when you flew to Atlanta and then to New York.
00:16:57You forgot to bring the security team.
00:17:05Mind if I borrow your men?
00:17:08I'll have.
00:17:09Toss these ill-mannered apes out.
00:17:14Oh!
00:17:15You bitch!
00:17:16I'll have my son teach you a real lesson!
00:17:19A kiss as a reward, my lady.
00:17:23No.
00:17:25A kiss as a reward, my lady.
00:17:29No.
00:17:37Guest list is very distinguished tonight.
00:17:40You've got Bill Ford, Harvey Buffet, old money like me.
00:17:45Gentlemen, Harvey, Bill, this is Jared Cooper.
00:17:48Pleased to meet you all.
00:17:49Your families all started empires after the Industrial Revolution.
00:17:52What an honor.
00:17:54I heard you secured the Maple Plaza project.
00:17:57It's worth billions of dollars.
00:17:59Congrats.
00:18:00You'll be next.
00:18:02But we haven't received the contract yet.
00:18:04We deserve it.
00:18:05Oh, that's nothing.
00:18:06I introduced this kid to Elon Musk.
00:18:08The Vanderbilts and Ms. Musk have always had a good relationship.
00:18:11So, I thought I'd help the kid out, pull a few strings.
00:18:15Thank you, Mr. Vanderbilt.
00:18:16Now, we just have to impress Ms. Musk's special guest of honor.
00:18:21Yes.
00:18:22I heard they're a very important and powerful guest.
00:18:26Even wealthier than Elon Musk.
00:18:29Now, if we can just secure a position with his big shot,
00:18:33we can feast for generations.
00:18:38I'll do my best.
00:18:39Excuse me.
00:18:44Second, children.
00:18:46What if it's the Prince of Bhutan?
00:18:51How did a hobo like you sneak in here?
00:18:54Me, a hobo.
00:18:56How did a cheating scumbag like you sneak in here?
00:18:59You sleep your way in?
00:19:00I told you, Angela Lockhart, don't bother stalking me.
00:19:03Nothing will come of it, and it only sickens me further.
00:19:06Don't flatter yourself.
00:19:11This is your ex-husband?
00:19:14What, were you blindfolded when you married him?
00:19:17Who the hell is this?
00:19:19You were cheating on me?
00:19:20Son, you have to avenge me and Kaylee.
00:19:36That wicked ex-wife of yours hired some thugs and a gigolo to beat us up.
00:19:41They even took Kaylee's tiara.
00:19:50You dare hurt my mom, Kaylee?
00:20:00Get your hands off her.
00:20:06My lady.
00:20:20My queen.
00:20:33It's...
00:20:35It's him!
00:20:37He scammed a million dollars off me in a game of poker yesterday!
00:20:40Who are these peasants?
00:20:42These seats are reserved for THE Ellen Musk and her special guest!
00:20:46Oh, shut up, old man.
00:20:47You're disturbing the peace.
00:20:53Fuckers, you know who that is?
00:20:55That's Eric Vanderbilt.
00:20:57You have any idea how many generations of wealth he has?
00:21:00His ancestors built the railway and steamship empire of America.
00:21:04The Civil War would not have been won without his family's involvement.
00:21:07Vanderbilt.
00:21:08The father of that skank, Kaylee Vanderbilt, who only knows how to crawl her way into a married man's bed.
00:21:18That, Lolly Vanderbilt family?
00:21:20Vanderbilt family?
00:21:27Oh, goddammit!
00:21:29It's a stomachache now?
00:21:34Whatever.
00:21:35Angela can handle herself.
00:21:36She'll be fine.
00:21:37How dare you call one of us low?
00:21:53I'm Harvey F. M. Buffett, the most important investor in the entire stock market!
00:21:57I can wipe you out with a simple pinky only!
00:22:02And I can wipe you out with a strand of my hair.
00:22:06Not with me around!
00:22:08I, Bill Ford, and the entire Ford Auto Empire stand with these gentlemen!
00:22:13You're all just peasants compared to who I really am.
00:22:16You're fucking delusional, Angela.
00:22:21We've had enough of your games.
00:22:23Security!
00:22:24Break their limbs and toss them out.
00:22:27Looks like the old guard is teaming up against you.
00:22:30Don't worry.
00:22:31You got new money here.
00:22:35I can handle myself, thank you.
00:22:37Yes, my great.
00:22:39You're all despicable.
00:22:42An insult to your family names.
00:22:47Now, it's my turn to rule.
00:22:51Destroy Jared Cooper.
00:22:54Cut off all business ties.
00:22:56And if you don't,
00:22:58I will take away all of your family's wealth and power.
00:23:04Ha! I knew it!
00:23:05You're here to fuck with me!
00:23:07You can't fool anyone here.
00:23:09How much money did you spend on that kid up
00:23:11to hire that gigolo to make me jealous?
00:23:12You're an orphan who sells hippie spices at a flea market.
00:23:17You have nothing, and you will always be nothing.
00:23:21She's a gold digger.
00:23:24Gold digger.
00:23:26Gigolo.
00:23:28Want to try me for a night?
00:23:30Yeah, you're a little too pricey.
00:23:31Mr. Vanderbilt, we really shouldn't keep these bandits here any longer.
00:23:35They might upset Miss Ellen Musk and her special guest.
00:23:38Angela Lockhart is my spurned ex-wife.
00:23:40She's only here to try and ruin my bill in the Maple Plaza project.
00:23:43Oh, I'm gonna kill that sushi chef!
00:23:45Security!
00:23:51Security!
00:23:53You all don't realize that you actually all work for me.
00:23:55And now you're trying to throw a coup?
00:23:58You!
00:24:01Insolent fools!
00:24:03Let me guess.
00:24:04You're that special guest?
00:24:06I don't know.
00:24:08Throw them out!
00:24:10And not without some broken bones, too.
00:24:19Back down, Max.
00:24:20I got this.
00:24:24I got this.
00:24:43Hey!
00:24:45Hey!
00:24:51What the hell are you two doing here?
00:24:54I thought we were supposed to guard you.
00:24:56No, you're supposed to make sure Miss Lockhart is okay.
00:24:59Oh my God, we're so screwed!
00:25:10Angela!
00:25:12Don't hurt her!
00:25:14You bitch.
00:25:15I've always been sick of you.
00:25:16You just threw yourself at me.
00:25:18How dare you insult my boss like that!
00:25:20Your boss?
00:25:21Did she say her boss?
00:25:23Miss Musk.
00:25:24That's Ellen Musk?
00:25:26That woman right there is Angela Lockhart.
00:25:28My boss and sole heiress to the Henry Lockhart's fortune.
00:25:32Their lineage is older than this country itself.
00:25:35Past the American Revolution?
00:25:37Back to the Renaissance.
00:25:39If she's your boss, then that means Angela Lockhart is-
00:25:42That's Lady Lockhart to you!
00:25:44She's royalty!
00:25:45And since you're all subsidiaries, she's your boss's boss.
00:25:48What are you going to do?
00:25:50Kneel to me!
00:25:52Oh, your majesty!
00:25:55Welcome to the United States.
00:25:58We've always been your loyal subject.
00:26:01Yes, your highness.
00:26:03Is it queen or princess?
00:26:05It doesn't matter!
00:26:07My queen, please forgive our insolence.
00:26:09We didn't mean to offend.
00:26:12Hey, what are you doing, idiot?
00:26:14Let go of the boss lady and beg for forgiveness!
00:26:17Forgiveness!
00:26:27What rightfully belongs to you.
00:26:29She's a badass herself.
00:26:30He missed out on a good wife.
00:26:31You!
00:26:32You!
00:26:33You!
00:26:34You!
00:26:35You!
00:26:36You!
00:26:37You!
00:26:38You!
00:26:39You!
00:26:40You!
00:26:41You!
00:26:42You!
00:26:43You!
00:26:44You!
00:26:45You!
00:26:46You!
00:26:47You!
00:26:48You!
00:26:49You!
00:26:50You!
00:26:51You!
00:26:52You!
00:26:53You!
00:26:54You told me your wife was a hippie peddler!
00:26:55Turns out you were the freeloading scumbag this entire time!
00:26:57No!
00:26:58No!
00:26:59Don't believe their lies!
00:27:00I worked hard for everything!
00:27:01You worked for everything!
00:27:08Hi, Henry.
00:27:10So, our third year anniversary is coming up and I thought that maybe we can do something special this year.
00:27:15I can't focus on anything trivial like that. I have to figure out this bid for the Maple Closet Project and if I get it, I can take the company public.
00:27:31You were nothing before me. All your achievements, all your glory, that's all mine! Including the Maple Plaza contract. I can take all of that away just like that.
00:27:46No, you can't take that away from me!
00:27:48So that's why Elon Musk was urging us to pass on deals to this nobody!
00:27:52Oh, and this antique wedding ring? Yeah, I forgot to tell you. It was Queen Victoria's and its worth is equivalent to more than an entire country's GDP.
00:28:09No, I gave you back the ring? I divorced a royal heiress?
00:28:14No! No, please! No! No, please take me back baby! I still love you!
00:28:24Aw man, looks like they've started the party without us.
00:28:27No one's allowed to start a fight without Cole Eisenhower!
00:28:36Guard these two again.
00:28:38Did he say...is he Cole Eisenhower?
00:28:40President Eisenhower's descendant. After General Eisenhower won World War II, each of his descendants have all gone on to become five-star generals, the highest rank in the nation's military.
00:28:50Glad you buffoons know your history! Sorry I'm late, babe. I got lost trying to find Atlanta. Then lost again on my way back to New York.
00:28:57And that there is, that is the legendary boy genius, Dr. Wilson.
00:29:07He's Dr. House's protege!
00:29:09Dr. House?
00:29:10Yes.
00:29:11I thought that was just a TV show!
00:29:12Oh no, that's based on Real Figure.
00:29:14Yep, that's me.
00:29:15Son of James House.
00:29:17Dr. House, he's practically my uncle.
00:29:19I correctly diagnosed the Pope before him when I was just twelve years old.
00:29:23So he's been off crying himself a waterfall somewhere in the Netherlands for the last fifteen years.
00:29:28And I'm late because I ran out of gum and had to make a pit stop.
00:29:32Hey Alan, who are these weirdos and why are they here?
00:29:41Uh, they're all your fiancés.
00:29:44What?
00:29:46Fiancés?
00:29:49Plural?
00:29:50Fiancés?
00:29:51Plural?
00:29:53Watch it, nerds!
00:29:54I'm her fiancée!
00:29:55No, I'm her fiancée!
00:29:57You can both shut up!
00:29:58I'm her fiancée!
00:30:00It's you!
00:30:01It's me!
00:30:02Who the hell is he?
00:30:03I'm Spider-Man!
00:30:04How are all three of these men my fiancée?
00:30:10Uh, your father had arranged these engagements years ago, but I didn't tell you because you
00:30:14decided to marry Jared Cooper at the time.
00:30:18She has three bad-ass fiancés and she marries his dumbass!
00:30:24Whatever.
00:30:25Since you're all here, help me finish him.
00:30:30At your service!
00:30:31Me too!
00:30:32Oh!
00:30:33Oh!
00:30:34Oh!
00:30:35Oh!
00:30:36Oh!
00:30:37Oh!
00:30:38Oh!
00:30:39Oh!
00:30:40Oh!
00:30:41Oh!
00:30:42Oh!
00:30:43Oh!
00:30:44Oh!
00:30:45Oh!
00:30:46Oh!
00:30:47Oh!
00:30:48Oh!
00:30:49What is that?
00:30:50Ah! Ah! What is that?
00:30:55The most German festive water in the Nile River.
00:31:02Ruck to A8.
00:31:08Hello?
00:31:11I thought I was king!
00:31:12No, you wish. The king doesn't do anything, so Ellen can be my king.
00:31:17Oh, fine.
00:31:21Bankrupt the Fords right this second.
00:31:30I... I've been bankrupt! No!
00:31:35Who is he?
00:31:41I've been bankrupt! No!
00:31:44I told you I would remove all of you from status and power if you didn't cooperate.
00:31:49Well, guess what? Game over.
00:31:51Alright, boys. Let's figure out this four-way engagement.
00:31:54Oh, that's serious business.
00:31:56I'm right with you!
00:31:59Wait for me! Nobody beats me to the finish line!
00:32:02Angela!
00:32:15You already have three fiancés? You can't accuse me of cheating. I... want compensation.
00:32:22You greedy SOB!
00:32:27Who the fuck is that?
00:32:28My ex-husband.
00:32:29Wait, you were married?
00:32:31Yeah, and if that's a problem for you, then you can totally back out of this engagement.
00:32:36More for me.
00:32:37No, no, of course not. Just... do you want me to check your eyes for you?
00:32:42Don't steal my joke!
00:32:43I can make him disappear without a trace. All evidence of your past with him will be gone.
00:32:48What? Is there selfie on my face?
00:32:51Uh, yeah. Murderous intent.
00:32:54Let's remarry.
00:32:56Let's remarry.
00:32:58You still don't realize. I only fell in love with you because you saved me from drowning three years ago.
00:33:05Sir, it's an emergency. We need to wreck right away.
00:33:34Nicole Eisenhower and Shane Wilson are causing mayhem at the company warehouse.
00:33:39Okay, I'm on my way.
00:33:43She should be okay now.
00:33:48Hey, you! Watch over here. I'll be right back.
00:34:00You saved me.
00:34:04Fuck.
00:34:05I unwittingly gave away my own wife.
00:34:09Fuck.
00:34:10I unwittingly gave away my own wife.
00:34:12You've cheated on me.
00:34:14You've hit me.
00:34:15And you've insulted me.
00:34:17And after all that, I never want to see you again.
00:34:21I fucking hate you.
00:34:24Middle Lady Lockhart!
00:34:25God, what now?
00:34:26Yes, we understand that you are a very busy person, but if you're not going to give your ex-husband the Maple Plaza project...
00:34:37How about us three?
00:34:38Yes, unlike that scumbag, we won't turn on you.
00:34:40Yeah, no. You're all fired for trying to throw a coup.
00:34:45But...
00:34:47This is your fault, you doofus! We never should have believed your bullshit!
00:34:50No! No!
00:34:53We can't lose our positions with Ellen Musk and the Lockhart.
00:34:58Help me!
00:35:00I'll get you for this!
00:35:07Never should have listened to you!
00:35:09I'm ruined because of you!
00:35:24So...
00:35:26What's the situation here?
00:35:27I want to marry you!
00:35:28I want to marry you!
00:35:37I want to marry you!
00:35:40Listen...
00:35:42I only met you guys a few hours ago, and...
00:35:45I'm not interested in flash marriages.
00:35:47But...
00:35:48What if I told you...
00:35:50That we've known each other for much longer than just a few hours?
00:35:54Much longer.
00:35:55Angela?
00:35:59Your parents would like to have a video call with...
00:36:02All of you?
00:36:06My lovely princess, how are you?
00:36:09Look, your mother and I are in Italy!
00:36:11The views here are absolutely stunning!
00:36:14Perfect for a wedding, wouldn't you say?
00:36:16I heard you finally divorced that...
00:36:20Good-for-nothing, blood-sucking, free-letter husband of yours.
00:36:23Can't call his name, but...
00:36:26Anyway, congratulations!
00:36:28I've selected three prime young men for you to choose from to replace him.
00:36:34You must pick one of them to marry, otherwise...
00:36:37Let me do it!
00:36:39You must choose one of them in seven days, otherwise...
00:36:44We'll kill ourselves.
00:36:46Mom?
00:36:47All right, honey, that's it!
00:36:50Bye!
00:36:51Bye!
00:36:55So?
00:36:56Who are you going to choose?
00:36:59Well...
00:37:01What if I...
00:37:02Want all three of you?
00:37:05Well...
00:37:07What if I...
00:37:08Want all three of you?
00:37:10That seems greedy.
00:37:17But...
00:37:19I can always remove the other two options.
00:37:22Hey!
00:37:24I may be a doctor, but I can take lives too.
00:37:27I know and have access to all the deadliest poisons in the world.
00:37:31Whoa, okay.
00:37:33No murder, please. I was just kidding.
00:37:35We have seven days to win her over.
00:37:39Ooh.
00:37:40It's like the Bachelorette.
00:37:42I know.
00:37:43We'll start with challenge one.
00:37:47Welcome to the show, the three badasses who want me.
00:37:51Today, we have our first challenge.
00:37:55What is all of this, Ellen?
00:37:59You'll see.
00:38:05Oh my god! Oh my god! Cockroaches!
00:38:10All women are afraid of cockroaches.
00:38:13And it is every man's job to save their beloved woman from this monstrosity of a creature.
00:38:19What will our three candidates do to prove their undying love for our single, but screaming her head off, heiress?
00:38:25Looks like one of our contestants has already called it quits.
00:38:37It's up to the final two.
00:38:38Crunchy.
00:38:40That is sick cold.
00:38:53that is sick cold hey when you're stranded in the middle of the battlefield you'll be glad to see
00:39:08one of these around there are two more left want to try one oh my god no no oh my god save me
00:39:19what save you save me i'm a german folk doctor these hands can't get germs on them they're for
00:39:28surging and saving lives thank god you're here are you all right honey angela
00:39:51all right you won the first challenge so your reward you get to watch over her for the night
00:40:00just don't cross the line if you know what i mean i'm not her scumbag husband you have nothing to worry
00:40:05about honestly even if you guys fuck it's not like it's against the rules or anything
00:40:14at least my girlfriend gets some i bet her husband has a small dick anyway
00:40:18the cockroaches they're gone they're gone there's nothing in this room except you and me okay
00:40:26i'm going to kill ellen when i see her tomorrow
00:40:30i need a drink
00:40:35whoa easy you're on an empty stomach
00:40:45oh why do you care you're trying to drink away your sorrows angela
00:40:54you guys were right i was blind for marrying that asshole
00:40:59you know i wasted three whole years of my life with him he never even loved me and i gave up my entire
00:41:09career for him
00:41:14do you really think that you would still be number one on the forbes 30 under 30 list if i was around
00:41:21you may not be number one on forbes list but you know what you're number one in
00:41:26what
00:41:31you're number one here
00:41:38you know we've known each other kind of a long time
00:41:42lies
00:41:45you all just want something from me
00:41:46angela
00:41:54i know it's hard to trust again but i assure you i don't care what family you're from
00:42:03i'm the richest man in the nation i don't need your your power your your status your wealth your
00:42:10connections i just need you
00:42:16i'll prove my love to you within six days i promise
00:42:30screw the contest i just want love
00:42:33angela you're drunk i'm an adult can't i go just get what she wants okay
00:42:48but love and sex aren't exactly the same thing well they're not mutually exclusive either
00:43:04this is what you want
00:43:17so
00:43:32nine inch penis
00:43:33morning to you too
00:43:36you sure you were drunk last night you would a girl remembers when she's had a
00:43:41nine inch penis inside of her
00:43:44well glad you enjoyed it
00:43:47but don't tell shane or cole
00:43:50because then they would say that you're being unfair
00:43:54technically us having sex doesn't break any rules
00:43:57i won the first challenge and according to ellen my prize was to spend a night with you anyways
00:44:04don't make this any harder than it already is
00:44:06are you sure you don't want a pretty heart
00:44:14it's not
00:44:17fine fine fine
00:44:21i won't tell
00:44:24but only on one condition
00:44:25you have to go out on a date with me
00:44:36fine
00:44:40i've had a crush on you since college angela
00:44:43you never noticed me
00:44:44you should get dressed and get out of here before anyone sees you
00:44:55it's only seven a.m she's still sleeping
00:44:57i'm not sleeping alone
00:44:58yeah i'm not letting my fiance be alone with another man for another second
00:45:01morning gentlemen oh or shall i say ruffman
00:45:08oh don't mind him
00:45:11what's up guys
00:45:12we're ready for the second challenge
00:45:15no cockroaches this time
00:45:16yes no more terrifying things that was my bad angela
00:45:20this better be a good challenge ellen
00:45:22i'm sure you'll all enjoy this one
00:45:24the second challenge is
00:45:26the second challenge is
00:45:28a date
00:45:29lane i should have asked for something else
00:45:32a date
00:45:33that's it
00:45:34what's the catch
00:45:35no catch
00:45:36just who miss lockhart enjoys spending her time with the most
00:45:39as simple as that
00:45:40i know what i want to do let's start with me first
00:45:42okay
00:45:43what's up first then
00:45:44me
00:45:45saved the best for last
00:45:48ain't that right angela
00:45:49then it's decided
00:45:54please don't take my bmw away
00:45:57too bad
00:45:58you pissed off the lock hearts
00:46:01i have nothing left
00:46:11that bitch who ruined me
00:46:14it's that bitch who ruined me
00:46:26general eisenhower sir
00:46:27it's so serious but hang on
00:46:39lieutenant i don't know who i'm going to marry yet
00:46:41baby i decided to take you here on our first date so that i can introduce you to my guns
00:46:46guns like murder weapons
00:46:48yes murder weapons
00:47:01you're like my guns babe
00:47:12pretty rock hard
00:47:14yeah
00:47:14let me show you what i can do with them lieutenant come close
00:47:19wait you're just gonna hit him like that he's not even gonna fight back
00:47:24fighting back will be treason ma'am
00:47:26treason you guys are way too serious
00:47:29look you awkward bitch i caught you if i'm going down you're all going down with me
00:47:35lieutenant
00:47:36i'm going down you're all going down you're going down you're all going down
00:47:48you're all going down
00:47:50you dare try to hurt my wife
00:47:54i will make you pay
00:47:55you don't need to keep beating him up we could just take him to the cops
00:48:01not when he tries to hurt you
00:48:09so he's a bit violent some might call it being protective
00:48:12poor anger issues what if we get married and i forget to use a coaster on an antique table or
00:48:18something is he gonna be like rough hey some girls are into that i don't know if i am
00:48:27well maybe shane will be your type
00:48:32your date with shane starts now
00:48:39hey cool ride a gift from the chancellor of germany when i saved his wife impressive
00:48:48your breath smells like peppermint refreshing i got cool mint too or do you prefer spearmint
00:48:59what do you not have in this coat of yours fruit flavor gum i can't stand though so where are you
00:49:06taking me tonight let me show you
00:49:08oh my gosh it's my gold digging neighbor who just got dumped by her husband
00:49:34what are you doing here i just thought this was for the vip of vips your mother-in-law told me all
00:49:42about the divorce and how you hired some gigolo to beat her and kaylee vanderbilt up
00:49:49hello of you what are you doing here sandra of course your birdbrain wouldn't remember
00:49:55i sell high fashion jewelry pieces so high-end you couldn't even afford even if you sold your organs
00:50:00the auction begins the auction begins i'll deal with you later yeah i'll just be able to say
00:50:13cameron i have a task for you
00:50:18our next piece is absolutely extraordinary cleopatra's armband sold by our vendor sandra miller
00:50:26for five million dollars excuse me i'd like to donate this piece to auction it's queen victoria's ring
00:50:37i'd like to donate this piece to auction it's queen victoria's ring what are you doing just watch
00:50:44that is queen victoria's ring please i'm an expert and that's a fake she probably got it at the flea
00:50:57market she works at you work at a flea market not this again cut the that wouldn't even sell for five
00:51:04dollars oh yeah here you want it for free ew i don't want that trash from a stinky hippie peddler
00:51:11well that's too bad then because you are the fraud what are you talking about who the hell are you to
00:51:20accuse me throw them out dr wilson i know you're a legend in medicine but we're professionals oh yeah
00:51:29and that armband sells for five million dollars yeah mine is the real thing you two are just upset
00:51:36because you're too poor to afford our luxury items what is that so the so-called expert fell to recognize
00:51:44queen victoria's ring then dear lord this is real it's authentic it's queen victoria's ring
00:51:57cameron what have you found yeah that picture of cleopatra's armband you sent me it's a replica
00:52:04so you're the fraud so you just went to the flea market so you can buy some fakes and cameron how
00:52:17much are these fakes being sold for 150 wow not even five dollars sandra you've been duping us the
00:52:27whole time arrest her no please this is one time please what's going on dr wilson uh investigating lead
00:52:38poisoning from cheap jewelry for the emperor japan bye black calista from the jewelry industry forever
00:52:44i had a really great time tonight me too may i have a kiss
00:53:10uh something wrong do you always have gum in your mouth
00:53:23yep you never have to worry about stinky breath for me
00:53:25oh you owe us a bunch of money cooper i don't have any money how did you pay for this hotel then
00:53:43i guess you'll only pay up if i break your other way stop
00:53:56mr vandeville
00:54:00mr buffett
00:54:05this is the contract for the maple plaza project that's right miss musk wanted me to give it to you
00:54:11i knew angela was still in love with me i knew angela was still in love with me no no sorry about
00:54:18those injuries from earlier it was all just uh just a little misunderstand yeah we could be partners
00:54:24again and then maybe you can um tell uh lady lockhart put in a good word for us
00:54:31angela still loves me she's just throwing a fit she'll be back to me soon enough yeah do you need any
00:54:37help winning her back we can give you jewelry to give to her i was just sucking up to these pricks
00:54:43a few days ago and now they're all begging me to help them out it feels so damn good to be in power
00:54:50sure i'll put in a good word for you i just need anything you tell us we'll give you anything once i
00:54:58take everything from these idiots i'll go after angela lockhart for my revenge
00:55:10i'm giving a contract to jerry cooper just like you asked me to well done he'll be
00:55:14fucked soon well done he'll be fucked soon i don't get it miss musk my contract has a preliminary clause
00:55:23requires him to pay 50 of the costs up front as a deposit and if he can't then what he'll be
00:55:29bankrupt so as long as his greedy have to take it i'm avenging my best friend i want to show the
00:55:37world that without angela lockhart he's nothing i signed the maple plaza project we should celebrate you
00:55:51did you see i know my son has it in him that skank angela is nothing next to you and it's all thanks
00:55:59to you sweetheart actually it's thanks to angela
00:56:06what you're trying to ditch me to go back to your wife oh no no no he's not jerry what are you doing
00:56:14you have such a beautiful and bright future ahead of you it's my decision mom i'm the head of the house
00:56:20here i'm telling my dad fine go right ahead he has enough problems himself if you're obedient i'll
00:56:27keep you around as his side piece but if not you can scram dad jared is being mean to me teach him a
00:56:36lesson kaylee be a good girl okay jared has the backing of some very powerful people now don't get on his bad
00:56:43side we can't afford to piss him off so do as he says what that
00:56:56i'm sorry be your side piece very good i'm happy you've come around now let's go celebrate
00:57:07i mean do i really want to be with mr minty mouth forever though
00:57:12but that tongue action though tongue is important in more than just one spot
00:57:16darling we are in public well that's true oh stomach ache again i have to run to the bathroom
00:57:23devin should be here to pick you up soon okay devin's late not a good sign for a date
00:57:31this hotel restaurant has five michelin stars it's her and she's alone with no one to save her
00:57:42you whore you seduced my son so he could get back with you
00:57:52let me tell you i would never go back even if your entire family got down on their knees and begged me
00:58:01hey you guys can fight all you want you need to take this somewhere else whoever gets rid of her for me
00:58:06gets all this what why do i have to leave she's the one starting shit because i have money and you
00:58:13don't you're just a stinky hippie peddler and my son just signed a 100 billion dollar contract
00:58:20he's still got the contract hmm must be ellen's doing even if he does sign it he doesn't have the
00:58:27liquidity to pay the deposit up front oh he's just gonna bet you've never seen this much cash before
00:58:35bet you've never seen this much cash before
00:58:37you take my charity and toss it in my face as if it's your own my maid wouldn't even pick up such a
00:58:47pitiful amount one thousand dollars to take her away two thousand dollars to drag her away five thousand
00:58:55dollars to beat her away
00:59:00oh oh hey hey ow hey stop
00:59:03you okay are you hurt
00:59:12weekly you you just a few days ago you found yourself a boy toy right after getting divorced
00:59:18and now you have two more what a whore what a whore yeah and jared wanted to get back with her
00:59:26what if she has an std oh like sleeping with a married man wouldn't give you an std
00:59:32let's go we'll expose her to jared hang on what do you want i'll scream
00:59:40i don't hear a woman but i never said i don't kill him but i never said i don't kill him i said i don't kill him
00:59:50oh god he is a murderer what if he murders me not him definitely not him
00:59:56we're not afraid of you that's enough this isn't a war zone you'll be removed from being a five-star
01:00:07general if you hurt a civilian without adequate cause i was just messing with them was he though
01:00:13we're not afraid of you jared you have to avenge us look at this slut she's found two more boy toys she's
01:00:21cheating on you don't get back with her oh mr cooper it's you i apologize for this scene
01:00:26i'll toss out the potty crashes immediately so that you can go to his salvation banquet
01:00:31who did you say you were gonna toss out who did you say you were gonna toss out the potty crashers
01:00:36oh you have any idea who that is that's my wife please save that title for the real spank over there
01:00:46that's right know your place shut up she's cheating on you
01:00:52know your place you're just a side piece if i still want you that is eric have you gone mad
01:00:58this is eric vanderbilt's only daughter you slap her for this whore mom they really think there's
01:01:05something huh angela's an heiress to a family whose wealth and status goes back to the victorian age
01:01:10she's richer even than ellen musk i only got the maple closet project because she gave it to me what
01:01:19you apologize right now or i will kick you and your father to the curb
01:01:23i'm sorry no this can't be i made you divorce
01:01:39go home you're not suited to come with me to my celebration banquet
01:01:43i apologize on behalf of my mother honey i know you came here to celebrate my achievements
01:01:56i promise no one will bother you anymore i didn't come here for you i'm on a date
01:02:03a date with two men at the same time she really is a whore and girl please forgive me i really do love you
01:02:13oh lady larkhart is here oh lady larkhart is here yeah yeah yeah we we already know you beat fort's
01:02:25effort we're we're too old for that they're here for my celebration banquet please you gave me the
01:02:31contract so if anyone should go as my guest of honor it should be you oh yes please miss larkhart join us
01:02:38we'll all be one happy business family again what the hell are you all doing here where were you
01:02:46stomach issues again would you like my diagnosis no let me make myself clear okay i would rather die
01:02:58than be with you again seems that they're not actually on good terms
01:03:03i can't lose face in front of these pricks otherwise they'll cut me off too
01:03:08angela i know you're still mad but please give me a chance i'll prove it to you
01:03:12you want a chance angela no you have three great guys here who all want to marry you
01:03:18don't take him back i'll give you two choices
01:03:24i'll give you two choices
01:03:25me or the contract you're kidding me no i'm not kidding you if you choose me we can remarry this
01:03:38week but you don't get the hundred billion dollar contract the choice is all yours so that's a
01:03:46choice you think so he either marries a royal heiress or gets a contract that takes his company to the
01:03:51moon either way benefits why can't i have both you really are a greedy bastard angela i saved you in
01:04:00the pool remember i deserve the contract did you really look who's fashionably late now
01:04:12he didn't save her at the pool wait what what are you talking about i uh i choose the contract
01:04:19i knew it you'll get what's coming to you with this contract my company's earning potential is
01:04:26limitless angela lockhart you humiliated me in front of everyone i will get you one day
01:04:33let me show you something
01:04:34you saved me
01:04:52you saved me i'm sorry if his lies led to you wasting three years of your life
01:04:58but i promise you i'm gonna make it up to you with the rest of our lives no no i wasn't lying i just
01:05:08couldn't can't remember exactly what happened that day
01:05:18does that mean we both each saved her once what me dr wilson losing at saving people no way
01:05:28you guys one of you do something life-threatening right now you're crazy and actually they've all
01:05:37been doing horrible behind your back what mr sterling had me investigate their company's dealings
01:05:45turns out they've been fudging the numbers on your shared accounts and contracts put it simply they've been
01:05:51stealing from you i can't believe i didn't realize miss lockhart i'm so sorry i should have had third
01:05:58party accountants check thoroughly you know it's not your fault they're just too slick you'd like me
01:06:04to punish them oh god no not that again please max you know what to do
01:06:20the banks have pulled all our funds all business ties have been severed
01:06:28we're bankrupt
01:06:33how did you do that who are you and don't say spider-man
01:06:41i'll tell you who i am i'll tell you who i am
01:06:46i am crypto punk number two what did he say he was that's more bizarre than spider-man
01:06:57you're crypto punk number two well i'm crypto punk number one see
01:07:03you are number one at something the most expensive nft collection in the world
01:07:08forget forbes's list it's all about young money now so how about our date
01:07:20i'm not letting them one-up me on this one let's buy two
01:07:35uh they forgot to cancel my contract i still have the 100 billion dollar project
01:07:43yes i'm rich they make them all pay soon
01:07:54what mr cooper sir the maple plaza contract requires us to provide 50 of the costs up front
01:08:00otherwise it's a breach of contract and will have to pay for all financial repercussions
01:08:05no i'm bankrupt
01:08:10manager of a law card you tricked me
01:08:17oh allow me
01:08:21i'm sorry i was late my queen had to get some very important materials
01:08:26for our special date well cheers cheers
01:08:41this looks good
01:08:47did you use my spices i know your ex-in-law's never appreciated you
01:08:52you can have all the money and power in the world and you still can't force man to love you
01:09:02couldn't even remember our anniversary
01:09:08angel
01:09:10your future with me
01:09:12your future with me it's gonna be different come on go to the stairs
01:09:28your future with me
01:09:37wow
01:09:39devon i can't believe this is what i've been missing out on these past few years
01:09:43just because of some silly mistake
01:09:46angela
01:09:48i've known and loved you for three whole years
01:09:51actually
01:09:53i've also loved you for three years
01:09:54that's right i fell in love with you three years ago too
01:09:59how is all of this possible i didn't meet any of you until recently well actually maybe devon but
01:10:10i've had a crush on you since college you're my motivation to go to business school
01:10:17despite who you were you never judged me for being poor
01:10:20are you trying to get hired at fortune 500 in a suit like that
01:10:31all you do is babble on and on about internet money bitcoin and shit like that
01:10:37are you trying to steal my spot i'll teach you a lesson
01:10:46hey get away from me
01:10:48shut up
01:10:50feisty girl i like her
01:10:52how is he it's a rare poison made from a mixture of dried roots found in africa
01:11:09ostriga saltifu can he be cured
01:11:12i actually think i know that poison it sounds really scary but it's cure can actually be found
01:11:16in any developed country household salt
01:11:26i like her
01:11:29there you go
01:11:31what time is it oh shoot i'm late for some practice
01:11:36i like her
01:11:45we have been rivals ever since
01:11:48so that's how i well we all met i barely remember should i never let you go to swim practice that day
01:11:58matthew richards the guy who poisoned me attacked you out of revenge
01:12:02you wouldn't have known i did hear you dropped out and became a loan shark though
01:12:06that makes you feel any better
01:12:08yeah i think that suits him a little better
01:12:10angela your seven days is almost up now that you know they all loved and fought for you for three
01:12:16years who will you pick
01:12:23how couldn't it be angela lockhart is an heiress
01:12:28the vanderbiltes have gone bankrupt well then get out of here you can't do this to me
01:12:45jared it's me what happened jared i have carefully reconsidered angela is way better than this dimwit
01:12:57you should get back with your wife we're bankrupt what
01:13:05jared cooper
01:13:06jared cooper we're here to propose your belongings no one is going to save you now
01:13:19what kind of an asshole throws his own mother to the dogs
01:13:26who will you pick
01:13:26i brought you fried chicken fried chicken hey not all girls like sushi and caviar
01:13:40yeah he's right i did live in atlanta for three months
01:13:43sucking up last minute at least i don't speak like an ai robot hey stop stop
01:13:50welcome back to the bachelorette i mean the three badasses who want me i mean
01:13:58angela lockhart you know what i mean today our heiress bachelorette will choose which one of our
01:14:06three badasses will she marry will it be shane the doctor cole the general
01:14:15uh looks like our bachelorette may need a little more time to decide oh the suspense is killing me
01:14:30but when she does she will take this eternal rose made from glass imported from venice and give it to
01:14:37our winner angela
01:14:41angela oh i uh i need more time to think
01:14:52uh while our bachelorette takes a little time to decide why don't we check in with each of our candidates
01:14:58let's check in with each of our candidates let's start with cole
01:15:02cole
01:15:07there's not much to say who wouldn't want a five-star general who has huge biceps a massive chest
01:15:16who would protect their wife
01:15:20okay thank you uh shane
01:15:26muscles money they only get you so far but you need a well-balanced man like me
01:15:32that has more than one way to keep a lady happy if you know what i mean
01:15:39okay i think we do and devon
01:15:44that was quite disgusting
01:15:48i just hope angela's okay i know she's going under a lot of stress right now a lot of choices to make
01:15:54and she's my queen i just really hope she's okay now one more thing what kind of a doctor
01:16:03brings fried chicken to a girl that's a good point it's bad for her heart
01:16:08and then you what you know what they say about military men they beat their wives
01:16:18this is
01:16:21no
01:16:24stand up
01:16:26hey you guys whoa break it up hey break it up
01:16:32Cut to commercial, cut to commercial.
01:16:57This is the hardest decision I've ever had to make in my entire life.
01:17:02Who do I choose?
01:17:11Angela's marrying me!
01:17:12You're not stealing her from me.
01:17:14Oh yeah?
01:17:15I may be a doctor, but like I said, I know and possess the deadliest poisons in the world.
01:17:24What don't you have in that coat?
01:17:26Fruit flavored gum!
01:17:27I won't let you take Angela away from me.
01:17:29I'll fight you to the death.
01:17:31Don't forget about me.
01:17:33It's time I reveal my true identity.
01:17:38These stupid profile cards don't make any sense.
01:17:41They do not help.
01:17:43Who made these?
01:17:45It's time I reveal my true identity.
01:17:55I'm actually a part of the X-Men.
01:17:57And I have the power of telekinesis!
01:18:09I'm actually a part of the X-Men.
01:18:11And I have the power of telekinesis!
01:18:15We may have to work together to take him down.
01:18:27This battle within our heads is the most intense I've ever experienced.
01:18:29I may not be able to take them both down if they decide to team up.
01:18:33Hmm.
01:18:34Winter mint or cool mint?
01:18:35You know?
01:18:36I've always really liked our hair.
01:18:37Really?
01:18:38I'm actually pretty self-conscious about it.
01:18:40So I appreciate it.
01:18:41You know?
01:18:42I've always really liked our hair.
01:18:43Really?
01:18:44Hey hey hey hey.
01:18:45Hey hey hey.
01:18:46You know.
01:18:47Come.
01:18:48Have always really liked our hair.
01:18:49Really?
01:18:51I'm actually pretty self-conscious about it.
01:19:07So I appreciate that.
01:19:09Hey hey hey.
01:19:10And you know?
01:19:11Come.
01:19:12I've already just really like the way you talk.
01:19:15Really?
01:19:16Yeah.
01:19:20What do you got for me?
01:19:21I always really like the way you chew gum.
01:19:25Yeah? Yeah.
01:19:26It's fresh, right?
01:19:27Yeah.
01:19:31You're actually a really good doctor.
01:19:33Yeah, I appreciate it.
01:19:34I'll check you out.
01:19:35If you need me to look at you, I got you.
01:19:36Hey, me too.
01:19:37I'll take care.
01:19:38Angela's been kidnapped.
01:19:40Angela's been kidnapped.
01:19:41It was Jared Cooper.
01:19:44That fucker!
01:19:45We have to find her.
01:19:46What the hell?
01:19:47Her ring.
01:19:48Her dad installed a GPS tracking mechanism on her ring just in case.
01:19:52Well, let's go then.
01:19:53My own!
01:19:54My fiance!
01:19:55My fiance!
01:19:56Jared.
01:20:02What am I doing here?
01:20:07You destroyed me.
01:20:10I took everything.
01:20:11What?
01:20:12I have nothing left.
01:20:13It's not my fault.
01:20:14You're too greedy.
01:20:15I was greedy.
01:20:16To have sex with my wife.
01:20:17What?
01:20:18I'm not your wife anymore!
01:20:19Oh yeah, I know.
01:20:20You wouldn't take me back now.
01:20:21Not unless I get you pregnant with my child.
01:20:22This is illegal!
01:20:23You wouldn't want your child to be away from its father.
01:20:24You won't have me arrested.
01:20:25You will take me back.
01:20:26You will take me back.
01:20:27Ow!
01:20:28Ow!
01:20:29You're a bitch!
01:20:30I'll set you down a little.
01:20:31You will be begging me to fuck you soon.
01:20:32Hey!
01:20:33Ansela!
01:20:34Come in!
01:20:35You will be begging me to fuck you soon.
01:20:40Hey!
01:20:41Ansela!
01:20:42Come in!
01:20:43You're too late!
01:20:44I drugged her.
01:20:45She'll be dead soon unless-
01:20:46Not that?
01:20:47I'll set you up the들 I just turned in once on the author.
01:20:48Out of the authority.
01:20:49You need to regret those ones, bro.
01:20:50We're cute.
01:20:51Make yous.
01:20:52You're enough.
01:20:57Rather than happy to rob the corporations.
01:20:58Let's go into anything that's nasty.
01:20:59No.
01:21:00No.
01:21:01Yeah.
01:21:02I think so.
01:21:04I think so.
01:21:05Stop putting it real hard.
01:21:07I'm sorry!
01:21:08Come on, see?
01:21:09You guys.
01:21:10Don't fall.
01:21:11There you go.
01:21:12Please stay potealtung.
01:21:13What does this have you?
01:21:14I saw fig plate.
01:21:15Everything except for fruit.
01:21:16Yeah, except for fruit-flavored gum, get it already.
01:21:18Just save my boss.
01:21:22Here you go.
01:21:27You're all good now.
01:21:29Oh, thank God.
01:21:31But what do we do with that piece of shit?
01:21:34What?
01:21:34What are you going to do to me?
01:21:36Hey, stop!
01:21:37No, don't!
01:21:39Enjoy your erectile dysfunction forever.
01:21:41No!
01:21:47Glad we didn't actually have that fight.
01:21:49Turns out he's the most dangerous of them all.
01:21:57So who did you pick, sweetheart?
01:21:59You've invited the most important figures of the world to your wedding,
01:22:02the Prince of Bhutan.
01:22:05And remember, we will kill ourselves if you don't choose.
01:22:11Welcome back to the finale of The Three Badasses Who Want Me.
01:22:17We're down to the wire.
01:22:19Literally, the wedding day.
01:22:21But who's the groom?
01:22:34Welcome back to the finale of The Three Badasses Who Want Me.
01:22:39But who's the groom?
01:22:40Oh, it seems our era still hasn't decided.
01:22:47Any input from the parents?
01:22:50Maybe that will help sway our bachelorette's choice.
01:22:53Oh, this is exciting.
01:22:55Who should my daughter pick?
01:22:57Let me think.
01:22:59I like the doctor.
01:23:04He's cute.
01:23:06But the general looks like a strong fellow.
01:23:11And we can't forget about Devin Sterling,
01:23:13the one who's loved her the longest.
01:23:14Isn't that right, Devin?
01:23:16Angela.
01:23:17You are all three very fine gentlemen.
01:23:29And I'm really grateful for all of your love.
01:23:32But this was a really hard decision.
01:23:36And I decided to devise one last challenge.
01:23:41And I decided to devise one last challenge.
01:23:50I'm just kidding.
01:23:51I'm just as sick of this as you guys are.
01:23:52Each of our candidates have saved our main character.
01:24:01I mean bachelorette once.
01:24:03They've all proven their undying love.
01:24:06So who gets to unlock Angela Lockhart's heart?
01:24:09Literally.
01:24:10Could it be the sexy and protective,
01:24:16general with a temper,
01:24:17Mr. Cole Eisenhower?
01:24:23Or the fun, wicked-minded,
01:24:26but kind of weird,
01:24:29Dr. Shane Wilson?
01:24:33And last but not least,
01:24:35could it be the richest man of them all?
01:24:37The man Angela would have married a long time ago,
01:24:40Mr. Devin Sterling.
01:24:45Gentlemen.
01:24:47It's been a pleasure getting to know you.
01:24:49As may the best man win.
01:24:52May the best man win.
01:24:55Drum roll, please.
01:24:56Gotta make you understand.
01:25:02Never gonna give you up.
01:25:04Never gonna let you down.
01:25:06Never gonna run around and desert you.
01:25:10Seriously, Ricky?
01:25:11I choose...
01:25:19I need a powerful strong man
01:25:31and I really feel like
01:25:32it's gonna protect me.
01:25:35Who could resist those guns?
01:25:39Do they interest you in an NFD, Ellen?
01:25:42Do you like a full-body check-up?
01:25:43I do.
01:25:49Shane, it's you.
01:25:58I'm love-sick for you.
01:26:00You like that minty flavor, don't you?
01:26:02Yeah.
01:26:05It's that tongue action, ladies and gents.
01:26:08Ellen, be my new queen.
01:26:10Think of what we can build together.
01:26:12Guns, baby?
01:26:13Guns, too.
01:26:13All right.
01:26:19It's always been you.
01:26:34I'll always love you.
01:26:38Let's give it up for those nine inches, everybody.
01:26:40What the hell is that like?
01:26:43Would you like a full-body check-up?
01:26:44Have you seen my murderer weapons?
01:26:45I need fruit-flavored gum for you.
01:26:49I need fruit-flavored gum for you.
01:26:50I need fruit-flavored gum for you.
01:26:51I need fruit-flavored gum for you.
01:26:52I need fruit-flavored gum for you.
01:26:53I need fruit-flavored gum for you.
01:26:54I need fruit-flavored gum for you.
01:26:55I need fruit-flavored gum for you.
01:26:56I need fruit-flavored gum for you.
01:26:57I need fruit-flavored gum for you.
01:26:58I need fruit-flavored gum for you.
01:26:59I need fruit-flavored gum for you.
01:27:00I need fruit-flavored gum for you.
01:27:01I need fruit-flavored gum for you.
01:27:02I need fruit-flavored gum for you.
01:27:03I need fruit-flavored gum for you.
01:27:04I need fruit-flavored gum for you.
01:27:05I need fruit-flavored gum for you.
01:27:06I need fruit-flavored gum for you.
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