- 2 days ago
Category
🎥
Short filmTranscript
00:00ah my two favorite girls Danica Patrick and Jillian Michaels are here you're in
00:08a chipper mood well why wouldn't I be bike lanes the bed fact that we're still
00:13living under the tyranny of daylight savings I think my dream project might
00:19be signed I got a 63 vet I'm to restore this could be like my Michelangelo's
00:24David except this won't be naked it'll have a much bigger engine on it I had no
00:31idea running my own coffee truck would be so exhausting plus everyone I deal with
00:36hasn't had coffee yet start-ups are brutal you'd say much I signed an NDA with my
00:43friend Genevieve we signed in glitter pen but it's no caps oh good morning what's
00:51good about it oh you're grumpy and your grandpa's a ray of sunshine is this the
00:56freakiest Friday I got fired from Game Hunt what did they tell you why my boss said
01:04I'm not made for the video game industry well your butt print on the couch says
01:07something different see you guys bye I'm gonna go tell off his boss and while I'm
01:17out the mall I'll get my sweet boy a treat to make him feel better he's a teenager not a corgi
01:22I think he would appreciate having his mom stick up for him how'd you feel about me going and
01:27talk to your volleyball coach when you're in high school talk you told him to bench me
01:31the team lost six games straight something had to change
01:35stop drooling on my renderings come on you should have seen what he did with these leather swatches
01:54I wouldn't pick them up without gloves so who's the client I don't know we're going to meet him in a
02:01minute important thing to remember is Greg's custom screwed up so we got the job hey you know what
02:06we should send him an edible arrangement as condolences let's send two look gotta say buddy you really
02:14impressed me with this color interior this brown is gorgeous biscotti with sepia and hazelnut accent
02:20brown but listen I want you in on this pitch do you mind really yeah yeah I always knew this
02:30would happen for you now that it has I hate you come on it's not like you got the rose with the
02:37bachelorette you know that show's popular for a reason I'm looking for Matt Parker I'm Keith Rodriguez
02:47I own the Corvette I am Matt Parker nice to be here to my crew guys Keith feel free to bow stop no
02:55bowing but a curtsy will do hi I'm nervous I mean Gabe Gabe's nervous I'm Gabe I just want to get my
03:05hands in your car oh hey stitch oh you guys know each other yeah it's uh it's been a long time not long
03:13enough well now that you're all caught up just sit down here for a minute Keith let's take a look at
03:27the little presentation okay all right this is your car is what we're doing the inspiration moving your
03:33car into the future is the old Grand Sport now the Grand Sport unlike public urination here in North
03:39Hollywood is illegal take some of the elements of this and bingo this is where we're gonna take it
03:46but what's really cool about it we're going vintage on everything but the interior stitch tell me the
03:51interior is brown hey mom I saw you calling what's up oh I left your voicemail voicemail he was a thousand
04:04that's only funny when it's aimed at grandpa if you had listened you would have heard my good news I went to
04:11game hunt to see your ex-boss Blake oh my god you got my job back no he asked me out he's like 21 and does not know how to
04:19take you for an answer but uh good to know your mom still got it so what's the good news you have a new job with a super cool boss
04:28me I'm the super cool boss
04:32holla please don't holla
04:36I know you better than anyone with the right guidance who will make an awesome employee
04:42yeah bring it in thanks mom I won't lay you down yeah and we're gonna show your ex-boss just how wrong
04:49he is except about me being hot it's a car like this is the reason I'm in the rest of our rod business
04:56I just love doing this this car will be the most impressive thing you've ever seen or smelled our finished
05:02waxes green apple yummers
05:05I'm not supposed to talk
05:09hey yummers
05:12let's do this Matt oh excellent excellent you won't be disappointed thanks for your business
05:16thanks I'll get the paperwork off to you
05:18yep yes
05:20oh this is such a great job great job
05:22how did the young kid say it
05:24I love me some me
05:26this is a call for a celebration okay
05:29well you nailed it boss thank you just so you know I'm not working on the car
05:34what you heard me I'm not working on that car
05:43sorry I already got the cork started
05:50stitch why won't you work on this car you don't know the dude on the scale of
05:54corella de vil and saddam hussein he's the dude in seven with the box
06:00you know like I don't like jay leno right yeah it's actually it's not he talks like this
06:05that's not how he sounds he sounds like this at home
06:10but I still think the dude's money find somebody else to do the interior give me a reason why I would
06:16do that why you always say employees should be seen and not heard oh you're using my own words
06:21against me that's real good he's your friend you got to talk to him best friend
06:27I mean we don't put a label on it
06:31you know best friend yeah I'll talk to him
06:38Carter what are you doing
06:40I'm about to drop a killer meme in the bronis brothers group chat
06:44it's putting in three ha-has and a cowboy emoji
06:50well you work here now so maybe help me serve these customers
06:54by the way what are all these kids doing here are we the new cool coffee shop don't tell them
06:58I love imagine dragons
06:59uh no that's all me took some initiative and launched a social media campaign well done carter
07:09more importantly well done me for getting the best out of you I'm like that uh sports coach on the
07:14sports team that won all the sports championships man I wish you knew sports so I could get that
07:20reference hey man can I get one more of course ego value customer
07:29um carter we don't do free refills oh yeah that's not a free refill because I didn't charge them for
07:35the first one you're giving away free coffee we only do that for firemen and not because they're hot
07:42because they're heroes hot heroes mom it's it's like the freemium model in gaming once they get
07:50hooked on the coffee they'll buy everything else we sell we only sell coffee mom uber didn't make
07:58money for the first 14 years okay but if I don't make money for 14 years we all die it's okay we all
08:06make mistakes thanks I'm glad you're not mad I need to take the rest of the day off gotta maintain
08:13that work-life balance you know namaste now I get why everyone hates nepo babies hey buddy no
08:26just talk to me okay I'm here for you to listen in and perhaps plant a seed of healing
08:42did you just blow my ear get the hell off me
08:47Matt told you to talk to me no you're a bad liar it's only because he cares you really a bad liar
08:56forget about Matt who's this Keith dude man it was something that happened when we were younger
09:01it was a bad time man look I don't want to get into it so as my friend best friend
09:06never mind continue I'm not working on that car so I need you to let it go like when you ask me
09:11why you can't give a black man the nod I got you
09:17look Gabe I appreciate what you're trying to do man but I just need you to drop it all right got it
09:24if you ever want to talk I'm here for you
09:36you just made a bad day worse
09:38Dr. Stitch what did he say he's still not gonna work in the car why not he says it's his business not
09:48ours my guess is this goes deeper than we think just like that american apparel v-neck I wore in 2008
09:57this doesn't sound like stitch this is something he's never done before look boss stitch and I were supposed to do that car together so if he's out
10:05I'm not too you know the code of the shop
10:08the only code in the shop is matt want matt get
10:13it's not true the wi-fi code is freedom fries
10:16man I want to get my hands in that thing
10:31relax it's just a car and it ain't even that sexy that's why I'm turned the other way thinking about baseball
10:38I want to touch it so bad but I can't it's like when I saw that penguin at sea world
10:46that penguin didn't have this kind of potential huh it did not it also bit
10:51you guys are missing out this could be an award winner at sema hope you like fro-yo because that's what's going to happen
11:00you mean fo-mo but don't correct me
11:03listen Dave enough of this playing around we got to start taking all the trim off of this thing
11:07told you boss I'm not going to work in this car
11:09well it's okay with me because we have plenty of other people in the shop can do all the work
11:13don't need you or stitch I can do upholstery yeah I took home back when I was in high school
11:18good way to meet girls that's what I thought turned out one girl and 25 other guys thought the same thing
11:25this is not your fight no I got your back
11:29if this goes sideways I'm moving in with you
11:34son of a marxist
11:37you all right boss or you need one of your boys from home ec to help you out
11:42I just got my first piercie oh hell I gotta move to portland
11:46now you can use the leather as a tourniquet
11:50I'm done with this you know you work on cars that I bring in that's how this works look I worked
11:56with you for 20 years I don't want to work on this one car and you can't respect that how about you
12:01respect me and tell me what's going on my reasons are personal okay we leave our personal stuff outside
12:06here I'll tell you what you come in tomorrow you work on the car or don't come in both of you
12:11I am dizzy
12:18hey what are you still doing up
12:21I had a nightmare Genevieve told Evan our business plan and ruined everything
12:27they were both little boo-boos
12:32not really a new-age person but maybe you should cut down on the sugar before you go to bed
12:38she had a little nightmare oh monsters copyright infringement
12:44checks out I'll come check on you in a minute
12:46so you're up late was it a very special two-hour Hannity he only does that at christmas time
12:56put a little extra work on this corvette project what are you doing up well
13:02i hired carter and i thought he'd thrive with an arm around his shoulder but he sucks he sucks so much
13:10so fire him i can't fire him he's my son i have to help him become the best employee he can be but
13:19he sucks he sucks so much as your employee and as your kid it's a complicated issue you know
13:28and you're not rich enough to raise your kids as if they don't suck
13:30great so i'm failing as a mom no so i'm failing as a boss no you're failing at both
13:40and there's my dad sometimes you got to keep your personal feelings out of business like today
13:46he's a little tough love with stitch and gabe you know i don't like
13:49yelling at people i'm just really good at it
13:51oh well you know what they say 10 000 hours makes you an expert
13:58okay look one more question for you if he wasn't your son what would you do oh i fire his ass there's
14:05your answer oh you're just gonna leave me with that like some capitalist yoda fire his ass your mask
14:11stitch man listen i was up all night i couldn't sleep you know what i'm gonna do the car i'm gonna do
14:28it for the shop i'm gonna do it for you and i'm gonna do it because gabe sent me three links trying to
14:34buy bunk beds now for the record i'm not gonna be happy about this i get it i'm never happy
14:46but i'm a little bit happy right now look man you gave me a job when no one else would
14:54no i gave you a job because you're the best at what you do there's no other reason loyalty
14:59means a lot to me
15:06i'm not gonna hug you i don't want you to hug me doesn't mean i don't appreciate you
15:11it's just i can hug you you can show me appreciate you ain't got to hug me i never
15:14said anything about i'm just not gonna hug you i don't want to not be a hug okay forget it let's
15:18do this all right just no hug okay hey matt i have something i need to say it's okay
15:24i would like to read from a prepared statement
15:32dear matt my time at parker customs and restorations has been fruitful and made me
15:39the man that i am today a man who is good with his hands but also good with his heart
15:44gay you don't have to
15:50let me hear the rest of this watch this train derail and run into an orphanage
15:56while i honor and respect you i must also honor and respect the bro code i have stitches back no
16:03matter what so even if it costs me my job which it doesn't have to but if it does please say it won't
16:11i have to do what i feel is right please don't fire me stitch is working on the car and so are you
16:18matt didn't you want to see him back i'm pretty sure he was gonna cry no i wasn't
16:26i love you guys so much no hugging
16:31partner you're late sorry mom but i had a real light bulb moment this morning me too the one in
16:37my closet went out pretty sure i'm wearing a tank top as underpants
16:45okay here it goes to make up for all the free coffee we charge double for everything and blame the
16:50tariff no one knows how they work anyway sit down i want to talk to you who like you need a break
16:59i love that you have ideas but the ideas that you have how can i put this they suck
17:11they suck so much wow someone's got their tank top in a bunch
17:17you know when i started waitressing at a casino i had all these great ideas but they didn't hire me for
17:24my ideas they hired me to wait tables just like i hired you to take out the trash get here on time
17:30work to the end of your shift you don't do any of those wow you sound like my old boss
17:38i'm triggered i need a mental health day
17:42i've always tried to protect you from failing but i'm not doing you any favors
17:46it's time you learned the value of hard work carter
17:55what you're fired are you saying did you just fire me well if you're gonna put words in my mouth then
18:04yes sorry about my own mom all right well i'm sorry but you need a little tough love right now
18:11i love you so much you'll always be mommy's special boy you want to go to the mall and get a treat
18:26sign the estimate we'll pretend that'll be your final costs
18:30you can be on your way ah the estimate the business world shrug emoji
18:34okay so keep me updated and uh everything's good with stitch yeah it's none of my business really
18:42is there anything i should know he's probably just jealous because i got the girl oh god always
18:48about a girl isn't it you know most people don't know the revolutionary war wasn't really about independence
18:55it was about denise
18:56see you get it i mean the thing with me and stitch was forever ago we were maybe 22 stitch
19:05had this girl he was out of town she got lonely so well 22 years old he went down to town
19:13he was in afghanistan wasn't he i think so he was serving our country well he should have thanked me
19:18for my service i know she did wow wow um i think i want you to get out of here what are you talking
19:27about i want you to get out of the shop we're not going to work on your car you see where the comma is
19:32on that check here's what the comma is that check you got to go you got to get out go go hey you're
19:36making a bigger deal about this than it is no i mean get out and then i want this car ahead here by
19:40five o'clock go let's go fine
19:43what's going on we're not working on this dude's car why not loyalty means something to me
19:52are you sure this is a big job there's things that are more important than money not a lot but some
20:01not game
20:06thank you
20:13let's bring it in we're not going to hide let's get out of here and get a drink i like that idea
20:43wait wait it's 10 o'clock where are we going we got work to do
20:52hey mom i gotta tell you something well she already knows what's on your laptop
20:59uh no i got my job back at game hunt you did tough love really worked that full grandpa on me
21:06oh the padawan becomes a jedi i went to blake and i told him i'd step it up
21:12i'd do whatever dirty work need to be done i am proud of you but you could have done that here
21:17she want me back god no
21:22try to survive a full day with no phones on an all-new abbott elementary now
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