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Transcript
00:00Dad! Dad! Dad! Dad! I just secured the Himalayan market!
00:06Cards frozen! Effective now!
00:09You let your own daughter wear a face and be laughed at?
00:12Last month, you spent three million on Fabri-J eggs and called them table decor?
00:19So?
00:21Come here!
00:24Pack her! Two sets of Target Basics!
00:27In her suitcase!
00:29And nothing else!
00:32No!
00:34No!
00:37Why?
00:51I'm sorry, Sir, who died on a warpath?
00:53Any friend who helps you gets their company bought and buried.
00:57Find me.
00:59Help me flip this and it's yours.
01:02Okay, well my cousin is looking for a contract wife and the pay is enough to buy you half a Hermes every hour.
01:09Your cousin Luke Carter? That bastard who outfitted me on the pink diamond last year?
01:13Okay, but one of the clauses is you have to spend every penny he gives you.
01:17It's not Mr. Carter, you just hired a professional.
01:22One.
01:23One.
01:24One.
01:25Two.
01:26Two.
01:27let's get hitched cash up front one year secret marriage and you'll need my grandfather's
01:51approval
02:01hi grandpa i'm sophia your granddaughter-in-law
02:05we miss you so much and we're so excited to be great grandbabies
02:09good girl sparky and straight talking i like that
02:13five million on the wedding day no less
02:17and a 50 grand monthly allowance
02:21wow
02:2350k to 500k tenfold
02:27honey you're not the best
02:29i swear that girl would wrestle alligators for a stack of cash
02:35this deal might be fun after all
02:39mr carter let's finalize the contract by email tonight
02:45what's going on
02:49what's going on
02:51what's going on
02:53what's going on
03:03fantastic
03:05we've got kids
03:07oh my gosh
03:08no
03:09manager, crack open an ace of space for each of these muscle brains
03:17Sue, are you serious? This is Luke's Club and you're ordering them like you ordered kids them.
03:23The contract did not ban me from having a bachelorette.
03:27I...
03:29Look at this!
03:37Mr. Carter, three years planning this only to propose at Ms. Sterling's lowest ebb.
03:42Why walk away after a single year?
03:46One year's enough. She still can...
03:50...fall in love with me.
04:03Mason, get with Mr. Wilder on the line.
04:10Hello, Mr. Carter.
04:12Mr. Wilder. Apologies for the intrusion. Skye's networking gala seems rather lively.
04:20Shirtless men at the affair. The Wilder approach to upbringing truly remains in a league of its own.
04:27You know this is on you, right? A pre-wedding bender really soft?
04:35Like my dad shouted at me so loud that my ears are still ringing.
04:38Easy now, Skye. This card won't abandon us like fathers do.
04:42Drown the table in the priciest ways, Truffles.
04:43Drown the table in the priciest ways, Truffles.
04:48Chill out, Glitter Queen, okay?
04:50Luke froze my heart when he said, if you walk into another club, your card is gone and so are you.
04:54legs!
04:55Well, well, well.
04:56Look what the cat dragged in.
04:58You know this is on you.
04:59I'm not going to do it.
05:00I'm not going to do it.
05:01You're not going to do it.
05:02You're not going to do it.
05:03No.
05:04Drown the table in the priciest ways, truffles.
05:11Chill out, Glitter Queen, okay?
05:13Luke froze my heart when he said,
05:15if you walk into another club, your cart is gone,
05:17and so are your legs.
05:19Well, well, well.
05:21Look what the cat dragged in.
05:24Sophia Sterling.
05:26What are they calling you again?
05:27Oh, right.
05:28The walking cautionary tale of bankruptcy.
05:31It was really sad how you got booted out
05:34before the Bundler even had a chance to pack his bags.
05:37It is kind of a surprise seeing you slum it here at Cloud9, though.
05:41Whose credit card are you on again?
05:43Zoe.
05:44What? It's okay.
05:45Zoe, honey, long time no mood.
05:48Still hanging on to what, last season's scraps?
05:51What?
05:52This is your brain, though.
05:54Yikes, what dividends must have tanked
05:56before they taught you real saddle stitch from a cheap knockoff, huh?
06:00Pop a bottle of .45 Roman Nikon tea
06:02from my concerned friend, Mrs. Holt.
06:04Bills on me.
06:10Shut her mouth and get her out of here now!
06:13Ow!
06:15Ow!
06:17Oh, shit!
06:19Sophie, that was legendary!
06:24Does Luke know that you're Jackie Chan's daughter?
06:27Oh, my God, how do you guys exist?
06:29Don't help me.
06:30Babe, you need to come get me down at Cloud9
06:32and they're trying to kill me!
06:34Sorry, honey.
06:35Please do me a favor.
06:36If St. Edwin lands you two in the same clinic,
06:38ask for their package deal.
06:40After all, misery loves company.
06:42Who dare lay the hands on my women!
06:47Babe, babe!
06:48Babe!
06:49Babe!
06:50Oh, you know what happened?
06:53Oh, shit!
06:54You know what she said?
06:55This bitch said that you're garbage
06:57and I'm not worthy to step off of her heels!
06:59Are you on that slide?
07:01Get on your knees and apologize now,
07:04or you'll be stuck in a wheelchair.
07:06Fuck God!
07:07You know what they did, babe?
07:12In high school, they were always bullying me!
07:15They always put dead rats in my locker!
07:18And they always tore my notebooks
07:20and now they're trying to kill me!
07:22Zoe, you're still the same!
07:24Framing people left, right, and center!
07:26Babe!
07:27You bitches!
07:28The airplane victim?
07:29Pin them down!
07:31No, no, no, no shit!
07:39If you're one inch closer,
07:41Carter Legal turns today into a full-course lawsuit!
07:44Manager!
07:45How can you just be sitting there?
07:46It's your security on their copper ip!
07:48We're already on their payroll!
07:50Mr. Holder's diamond, we have faith!
07:52They're trying to shove us down a broken glass!
07:54You're the damn accomplice!
07:55Return the deck!
07:56I'll handle the palace!
07:58And Luke Carter collects your kneecaps as souvenirs.
08:04He's my husband.
08:07In what fantasy land is he your husband?
08:11He.
08:12Okay, come.
08:13Call him.
08:14Call him right now and see if his billionaire playboy ass will come here and save you.
08:18If he walks through that door, I will gladly kneel on the glass and happily apologize with
08:23a smile.
08:24But if he doesn't, then I guess you two can hold hands in the icy moon.
08:29Go on.
08:54Here we go.
08:55We'll see you later.
09:04As I thought, a crow wearing peacock feathers, he might be your husband in a fantasy land,
09:31but trash will always crash.
09:34End her show!
09:36Let us go!
09:46I'm trying to go to sleep.
09:48Goodbye, bitch!
10:02You dare lay a finger in love, woman?
10:06Skoda!
10:07And hold your head with both hands.
10:09Okay, okay, hold up.
10:13Put your hand to the bottom.
10:15Show it to me.
10:17Because tonight, it leaves us from in my pocket.
10:21It's right.
10:22The perimeter is secure.
10:23Mercy is hard.
10:25She made us.
10:28Luke!
10:29They beat us up and made us kneel in this broken glass.
10:32I was terrified I would never see you again.
10:39Whoa, roll it back.
10:41Did we just stumble into the Oscars of Weepiest Reel without popcorn?
10:45It's okay.
10:46I'm here.
10:49You, and your woman,
10:52demanded my wife kneel.
10:56Kneel in that glass.
10:57Three full hours.
10:58Both filled.
11:04You can't do that!
11:05You should be arrested for felony assault,
11:08and aggravated menace,
11:09and use of a deadly weapon!
11:10What is that?
11:13Bite even more.
11:16You're fired.
11:17You're fired.
11:23Mercy, Mr. Carter!
11:25Please!
11:26I'll disappear for good!
11:27Just...
11:28It's her fault!
11:29She's the one who...
11:30Twenty minutes ago, you said you wanted to bury us alive,
11:33but now you've changed your mind,
11:35or you can't find the shovel.
11:37Yeah.
11:38They make me want to bleach my eyes.
11:41Yeah.
11:42The plan has helped.
11:43Industry-wide kill switch.
11:48Zoe Holt.
11:50You fucking jinx!
11:51What?!
11:52I hate to see you're fired!
11:53Go get the basketball!
11:54See if he throws you a bone, you dog!
11:57What do you think you are?!
11:58Ha?!
11:59You think you're so great?!
12:00You think you're better than me?!
12:01Ha?!
12:02I haven't finished my meal yet.
12:03We're going home.
12:05Record clearly.
12:06Give me your show Mrs. Holt on page 6 headlines.
12:09Ow!
12:11Help!
12:12Help!
12:13They will kill us!
12:21Should we go visit Grandpa?
12:23Eager to bond with my family?
12:25Or just eager for their cash?
12:27Mr. Carter, you're so tacky.
12:32How predictable.
12:33Tomorrow, 3pm.
12:34Sky Lounge.
12:35I should dress formal then.
12:36Sofia.
12:37I just pulled you out of a nightclub.
12:38Dare glance at another man and-
12:39Chill!
12:40I'll just stick with Grandpa.
12:41I'll just stick with Grandpa.
12:42I'll just stick with Grandpa.
12:44I should dress formal then.
12:46Sofia.
12:47I just pulled you out of a nightclub, dare glance at another man and-
12:50Chill!
12:51I'll just stick with Grandpa.
12:52I'll just stick with Grandpa.
12:56Muscle suit has been rested to your taste, Mrs. Carter.
13:11Just let me know if you need anything.
13:13Um, what's in here?
13:14Guess you.
13:15Your bedroom is at the end of the hall.
13:19Why don't I take a look?
13:22Mrs. Carter, and Mr. Duncan, come for my permission.
13:26Who gave you access?
13:35Get out!
13:41Block it.
13:42Now, from tonight, anyone who walks in here at a divided loses a leg, including this car.
13:50I understand, sir.
13:56Click to watch the full episode.
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