Miguel Wants to Fight is a hilarious coming-of-age comedy from 2023. Follow a 17-year-old as he enlists his three best friends to help him experience his first fight before a big move to a new city. This film explores friendship, courage, and the awkwardness of growing up.
coming-of-age comedy teenagers friendship first-fight new-city 2023-film youth
#MiguelWantsToFight #ComingOfAgeComedy #FullMovie #TeenFilm
coming-of-age comedy teenagers friendship first-fight new-city 2023-film youth
#MiguelWantsToFight #ComingOfAgeComedy #FullMovie #TeenFilm
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FunTranscript
00:00:00It was an age of heroes, a time of legends, and one final showdown we decide the fate of the empires.
00:00:29A hero.
00:00:33And then that's this.
00:00:34You owe me five dollars.
00:00:36I ain't paying you shit, Srini.
00:00:38Oh shit, power up.
00:00:40You've cloned yourself?
00:00:42This ain't good time.
00:00:44Cass!
00:00:56Hey, over here.
00:00:59I'm working on the Naruto videos coming off.
00:01:09Oh my god!
00:01:17Cass!
00:01:19Cass!
00:01:20Yes!
00:01:21Hell yeah!
00:01:22My god!
00:01:23He was Chris Tucker.
00:01:26Over top!
00:01:28Over top!
00:01:30It's not-
00:01:31Are you all hearing it?
00:01:33Are you all hearing it?
00:01:35No.
00:01:36No.
00:01:37Have y'all seen One Punch, man?
00:01:40Nah, what's that?
00:01:41Have y'all seen One Punch, man?
00:01:45No, what's that?
00:01:46It's this anime about this guy who's able to defeat any opponent with just one punch.
00:01:50Oh, shit.
00:01:50That's a dope skill to have.
00:01:52One punch?
00:01:54Or a really bad one.
00:01:55How's that?
00:01:56Because he can't masturbate.
00:01:58What?
00:01:59I'm just saying, if his hand is that strong, he might get super into it and accidentally
00:02:03one punch his own dick off.
00:02:04It's too dangerous for a composition.
00:02:06I would never make that trade.
00:02:07Well, what if it's the complete opposite?
00:02:08What if he's, like, really good at it?
00:02:09You know, just one pull and he could just...
00:02:10Hey, yo, don't aim your imaginary jizz at me, bro.
00:02:14No, okay.
00:02:15Fighting is a lot like masturbating.
00:02:16Fighting is a lot like masturbating, and you're doing one of them really wrong.
00:02:20One stroke, man.
00:02:21Yeah.
00:02:22All right.
00:02:23Wait, but hold on, though.
00:02:24So if you're a superhero and the resulting effect of your superpowers, that it only takes
00:02:28you one stroke to, you know, now, does that make your life happier or does that make your
00:02:33life sadder?
00:02:34Happier.
00:02:34Sadder?
00:02:35Come on, think on it like eating.
00:02:36Do you want to be tasting your food or do you want to be full?
00:02:39Eating is about savoring, experiencing that moment.
00:02:42You sound like the ratatouille of jerking off.
00:02:44No, I'm with David.
00:02:45You're good.
00:02:46Not me.
00:02:46I'm in and out.
00:02:47You never even knew I was there.
00:02:49I'm gonna feed off for a second.
00:02:50See you.
00:02:51Very good.
00:02:52I'm so glad I don't have a dick.
00:02:53Oh, my God.
00:03:02This looks crazy.
00:03:03That's the best one yet, man.
00:03:13Dang, oh, what a shot, bro.
00:03:15Yeah, Trini.
00:03:16100% from the field.
00:03:17Steph Curry on these bitches.
00:03:19Nah, that ain't Steph Curry.
00:03:21That's Indian curry, flavorful ass boy.
00:03:23You lost.
00:03:24Get off the court, you saggy face bitch.
00:03:26He does have a saggy face.
00:03:28I never noticed that before.
00:03:29Yeah, it looks like it's gonna fall right off his skull.
00:03:30Man, how much does the bottom of your face weigh?
00:03:32That's just gotta be like, what, eight pounds?
00:03:37Hey, yo, what the fuck?
00:03:46Get down, get down.
00:03:49We won't do this.
00:03:52You won't do this.
00:03:54You won't do this.
00:03:56You won't do this.
00:03:58Fuck, you won't do this.
00:04:02Hey, sorry he said that stuff to you, man.
00:04:12That guy just super sucks.
00:04:14Thanks.
00:04:16Most people just make an Aladdin joke or a convenience store joke.
00:04:19I appreciate that he was artisanal with his racism.
00:04:21Ooh, you should have called him cabron James.
00:04:25Because of the Indian curry thing?
00:04:27You know, cabron in Spanish.
00:04:30It's terrible.
00:04:32What about look-a-dog dick?
00:04:34Nope.
00:04:34What about James hard-on?
00:04:36No, I get it. It's just not that clever.
00:04:40Hey, hey, Armando's outside.
00:04:42Come across the street. Cool, thanks.
00:04:46Just got out a couple weeks ago.
00:04:48That's the first time I was seeing him.
00:04:49He hasn't even come by the gym at all.
00:04:51How long was he in?
00:04:52Nine months.
00:04:54Well, imagine you go from here about to be a rich professional boxer
00:04:57until you just got out of jail,
00:04:58staring in your grandma's front yard, staring at me.
00:05:00Holy shit.
00:05:02Oh, where are his cooking utensils?
00:05:08The next time we walk past,
00:05:10I'm gonna yell his name like we're buddies,
00:05:12and then we'll actually be buddies.
00:05:13Why would you want to be his friend?
00:05:15He's not a badass. He's a bitch.
00:05:17Oh, are you still mad because of what he said about your dad?
00:05:19Of course he's still mad because of what he said about his dad.
00:05:21Oh, damn it.
00:05:28What's up?
00:05:29My fucking sweater got torn in that fight.
00:05:32Yeah, man, they tore my shit, too.
00:05:34How do you get your pocket torn in a fight?
00:05:36Don't finger my pocket.
00:05:36Miguel, you good?
00:05:40Huh? Yeah.
00:05:41I'm good.
00:05:43I'm whole.
00:05:43We all did, like, an equal amount of, like, punches and whatnot.
00:05:48What?
00:05:49Wait.
00:05:50Did you not get in the fight?
00:05:53Huh?
00:05:55Huh?
00:05:56You didn't get in the fight.
00:05:57You didn't jump in.
00:05:58No, I was in there.
00:05:59I was just...
00:06:00I was more, like, on the outside.
00:06:02I was maintaining the perimeter.
00:06:03How did you not jump in?
00:06:04People jump in, you jump in.
00:06:05That's the rule.
00:06:06I was gonna, but it was just over so fast.
00:06:08Anyways, the other group had, what, three people?
00:06:10We had four?
00:06:11So it just...
00:06:12It wouldn't be fair.
00:06:13This motherfucker was doing math.
00:06:14You gotta jump in, man.
00:06:15No, you don't.
00:06:16Look, it's whatever, okay?
00:06:18You guys are fine.
00:06:19You always are.
00:06:20I would have jumped in if you really needed me to, but...
00:06:22Wait, hold on a sec.
00:06:23Have you never jumped in before?
00:06:24Like, zero times?
00:06:27Irrelevant.
00:06:27Now this motherfucker can't count.
00:06:29There's no way you've never jumped in.
00:06:30Give me my fucking phone, Claudia.
00:06:35Wait, what?
00:06:36Wait, what?
00:06:36What about the time I got into it with Claudia Dominguez because she stole my phone?
00:06:40Oh, man, I remember that.
00:06:41It was crazy.
00:06:42I still can't believe you open-hand slapped her.
00:06:46Miguel, I could have sworn you had my back against that bitch.
00:06:51Nope.
00:06:53Wait, but I definitely remember you jumping in that time at the movies.
00:06:58Yo, chill out.
00:07:00You're wrong.
00:07:03I didn't jump in there either.
00:07:05I didn't want to miss the movie.
00:07:07Y'all didn't even watch it.
00:07:08The guy fought a tiger.
00:07:15What about when David got into it with that kid on Halloween because he was fucking with you?
00:07:19No, you gotta know.
00:07:21Well, you know what?
00:07:23Yeah, it was me and that one dude.
00:07:25We were both looking at each other, but I don't think either one of us wanted to actually do it.
00:07:30So we ended up just aggressively hugging.
00:07:33Does that count?
00:07:36Oh, my God.
00:07:37David, did you know that he wasn't in the fight?
00:07:40Did you know this?
00:07:40Knowing is a strong word.
00:07:41This is fucking blasphemous.
00:07:42It's Miguel.
00:07:43It's not him.
00:07:44Come on.
00:07:44Have you ever gotten into a fight?
00:07:46Yes.
00:07:47With who?
00:07:48Oh.
00:07:48Wait.
00:07:50I don't see the point.
00:07:51How?
00:07:52How do I not see the point?
00:07:53Because fighting is stupid.
00:07:54No, how have you not gotten into a fight living here in this neighborhood?
00:07:57It's like what everyone does.
00:08:00And you love fight movies.
00:08:01It's the only thing you talk about.
00:08:02Also, your dad's literally a boxing coach.
00:08:05I just haven't.
00:08:07Okay?
00:08:08Fighting is bad, right?
00:08:10Like, on a scale of good things and bad things?
00:08:13Nope.
00:08:13It's awesome.
00:08:14Well, I know you've at least sparred, right?
00:08:17I mean, I'm at the gym, but it's mainly because of my dad.
00:08:19I'm just keeping the place clean, and I don't really like the gloves.
00:08:22They make my hands sweaty.
00:08:24The gloves make your hands sweaty?
00:08:27Getting into a fight alongside your friends is how you know you're really friends.
00:08:31It's on the friendship checklist.
00:08:32Terini might be a fast, masturbating idiot most of the time, but he's right.
00:08:35It's a part of it.
00:08:36Hey, come on.
00:08:37No, it is not.
00:08:38Jesus.
00:08:39Y'all are so full of shit.
00:08:40Just talk and talk and talk.
00:08:42Drop it.
00:08:46We're just playing.
00:08:47We're messing with you, bro.
00:08:48I know.
00:08:49I get it.
00:08:53Okay, what about this one?
00:08:54You could have told Sowell that his mom is Michael Horton.
00:08:58Or Kevin Horant.
00:09:00Like a whore.
00:09:01Stop.
00:09:01Stop saying whore.
00:09:02Stop saying whore.
00:09:10Hey, son.
00:09:11David.
00:09:12What's up, Mr. P?
00:09:13Dorks?
00:09:13Hey, coach.
00:09:14Mr. P.
00:09:15What's going on up here?
00:09:16It's nothing.
00:09:17I mean, we just got into a little something at the park.
00:09:19Some guy said some not nice stuff to Serini.
00:09:22Told you already.
00:09:23You want to fight, you come to the gym, not the street.
00:09:25Sir, how are you a boxing coach who's anti-boxing?
00:09:28I'm not anti-boxing.
00:09:29I'm anti-fighting.
00:09:30One is dignified.
00:09:31And his rules and a ref and safety equipment.
00:09:34The other isn't.
00:09:35He doesn't.
00:09:36But at least you all stuck together.
00:09:38That's a good thing, I guess.
00:09:41What about you?
00:09:42No war wounds?
00:09:43His nail kind of got me on my back, Dad.
00:09:47David, come.
00:09:48I've got a plate for you.
00:09:49Thanks, Mrs. P.
00:09:50Really appreciate it.
00:09:51You got a plate for me, too?
00:09:52No.
00:09:53Awesome.
00:09:53I'm serious about the fighting thing.
00:09:55You got it, Dad?
00:09:56Yeah, Miguel's got it.
00:09:59Later, coach.
00:09:59See ya.
00:10:00Gonna chill out David's, Dad.
00:10:01Don't forget to bring back my plate.
00:10:03Hey, you want to go get some pizza?
00:10:04My dad's making dinner later.
00:10:05Yeah, I'm on a diet anyways.
00:10:06All right, bro.
00:10:09I'm just need to the kitchen.
00:10:10Okay.
00:10:11Hey, Mama.
00:10:12Hi.
00:10:15Is that mine?
00:10:17Hi, Miss Nina.
00:10:19Hi, Miguel.
00:10:20How are you?
00:10:21Yay.
00:10:21What's up, Felipe?
00:10:23What's up?
00:10:24Hey, who's winning?
00:10:25Hey, who's winning?
00:10:26Your brother.
00:10:27Hey, you're not going.
00:10:30Oh.
00:10:32Do you have any help?
00:10:33Of course.
00:10:35Good.
00:10:35Hey, Dad.
00:10:49You good, bro?
00:10:51Yeah.
00:10:52Yeah.
00:10:54Do you miss boxing?
00:10:57Not really.
00:10:59Look, if it's about the fighting stuff,
00:11:00they're just being idiots.
00:11:01You don't got to do all that, bro.
00:11:02No, man.
00:11:03I know.
00:11:04I was just, just ask.
00:11:08So, look, um, I signed up for this SAT prep course,
00:11:11and I was just wondering if maybe you wanted to do it too,
00:11:14like, with me.
00:11:15The math stuff makes way more sense when you're walking through with me, bro.
00:11:18But obviously, if it's, like, a hassle or anything, like, you got your own life.
00:11:21Bro, I got you.
00:11:24Thank you, man.
00:11:25Because I promised my dad I'd get serious about getting to college,
00:11:27and the placement says it's Friday, and I just really need to crush this shit, you know?
00:11:30Oh, no.
00:11:30We're going to crush it.
00:11:31But we're going to crush it?
00:11:33It man style.
00:11:33Oh, but...
00:11:35No, like this.
00:11:36Faster.
00:11:39Hey, son.
00:11:54Why don't you come?
00:11:55Have a seat.
00:11:56Okay.
00:11:57It's okay.
00:11:58You're not in trouble.
00:11:59Don't worry.
00:12:01It's likely going to be not great when you hear this at first,
00:12:05but I think eventually it'll be good to you.
00:12:09Ow.
00:12:09I got offered a new job today as an RN.
00:12:14I applied a few weeks ago, and this morning they told me I got it.
00:12:17Oh, congrats, RN.
00:12:19It's amazing.
00:12:20Why is that a bad thing?
00:12:22We have to move.
00:12:23Like, to a better house that's here on the street?
00:12:26The job is in Albany.
00:12:28Albany?
00:12:29Mom, it's, like, two hours away.
00:12:31I didn't think I was going to get it, but then I thought if I did get it,
00:12:34you know, it wouldn't be for a few months, but then somebody quit and...
00:12:37Wait, so when does all this stuff happen?
00:12:40In a week.
00:12:42A week?
00:12:43Next Sunday we'll make our first trip down there, so eight days.
00:12:46It's going to be a big change for all of us, but it's a good thing.
00:12:48It's a much nicer neighborhood where we're looking.
00:12:51This new neighborhood is, like, the right weight class for you.
00:12:55Do you know what I mean?
00:12:56No, I don't, Dad.
00:12:58The boxer metaphors never work.
00:13:01You know how boxers have different weight classes?
00:13:04Babe, they really don't work.
00:13:06Remember when my mom was in a coma and you asked the doctor
00:13:08if she was down for the count?
00:13:10Can I be excused, please?
00:13:13Yes.
00:13:14I'm sorry.
00:13:14Yes.
00:13:15Oh, my God.
00:13:16Oh, my God.
00:13:17I don't know where I am.
00:13:17I don't know where I am.
00:13:18Yes.
00:13:18Oh, my God.
00:13:19I don't know where I am.
00:13:20You want me to go in.
00:13:21Oh, my God.
00:13:21So...
00:13:21Take your head off the line, Barney, come on.
00:13:46Pick up the pace, everybody!
00:13:52On your toes!
00:13:54All right, twist pointer!
00:13:59We'll use that jab.
00:14:01Stay small.
00:14:03Get on the inside.
00:14:13Yo, what's up, papa?
00:14:15How's it going?
00:14:15What's up, what's up?
00:14:17How's your mom?
00:14:18She's good. She's working.
00:14:19She's working a lot now.
00:14:21Oh, she said a thank you for the enchiladas yesterday.
00:14:23They were blonde.
00:14:23I'm glad.
00:14:25You, uh, want to hit the heavy bag like old times?
00:14:28No, I'm good.
00:14:29Thanks. That was more of a me and my dad thing.
00:14:32He was a special fighter to your dad.
00:14:34Felt like he was hitting you with two bags of concrete when he sparred.
00:14:38They called him the ferocious Filipino.
00:14:41That's a terrible nickname.
00:14:43Yeah.
00:14:44Hey, hey, hey, hey.
00:14:46Listen, David, um, things are changing.
00:14:50But, um, me and Lydia, we're always going to be here for you, no matter what.
00:14:54So how are things changing?
00:14:55Yo, yo, yo, yo.
00:14:57Chill.
00:14:58Yo, what's up?
00:14:59I'm good, right? Everything's done?
00:15:02Yeah, you're good.
00:15:02Okay.
00:15:04What's he talking about, though?
00:15:05I have no idea.
00:15:06But you got real weird on me, bro.
00:15:08You might want to check on your dad.
00:15:09Yeah, I could absolutely kill a bear with my hands if I needed to.
00:15:12Hey, we're going to the cave.
00:15:16All I'm saying is, if a bear couldn't kill Leo DiCaprio, a bear's not killing me.
00:15:20You've never even got this far, bro.
00:15:22Yeah, I did.
00:15:23No, you didn't.
00:15:23Yes, I did.
00:15:24I'm looking at the game.
00:15:24Are you watching the same screen as me?
00:15:26I thought it was amazing.
00:15:27I just love this man.
00:15:28This man is amazing.
00:15:29Look at me in this combo.
00:15:29You're never going to be a real salad.
00:15:31Kick, kick, slice, slice, slice.
00:15:35He's done.
00:15:37The job is an opening.
00:15:38It's like the right weight class for you.
00:15:41People jump in, you jump in.
00:15:43That's the rule.
00:15:44Getting into a fight alongside your friends is how you know you're really friends.
00:15:47It's Miguel.
00:15:47It's not him.
00:15:48Come on.
00:15:53I need your help.
00:15:54Did you try to one-stroke man yourself last night, too?
00:15:56I didn't.
00:15:57Unless you did.
00:15:58In which case, I also did.
00:15:59And it didn't work.
00:16:00The hell?
00:16:00I don't want to help with that.
00:16:01No.
00:16:03I want to get into a fight.
00:16:04What?
00:16:05What?
00:16:05Oh, you should fight an old man.
00:16:06What the fuck?
00:16:07I don't want to beat up an old man, but I do want to get into a fight.
00:16:12Why?
00:16:13Don't ask him why.
00:16:13Who cares why?
00:16:14It's because these two idiots gave you a hard time.
00:16:16You don't have to fight because of that.
00:16:17No.
00:16:17I've always wanted to say, fuck you, you old bitch, to an old man.
00:16:21I just want to.
00:16:22But why?
00:16:23Oh, my God.
00:16:23Let the man be, David.
00:16:25If he wants to fight, he should fight.
00:16:26Just support him like he supported you when you bought that shirt.
00:16:29Those got to be the strongest buttons in the world.
00:16:31It's supposed to fit like this, though.
00:16:33This is chic.
00:16:34Honestly, I think it'd be pretty funny to watch Miguel get beat up,
00:16:37and I don't need much more reason than that.
00:16:38For real, though, David?
00:16:39I've never fought anyone, and I don't want to fight.
00:16:42I mean, that's a part of the friendship checklist, right?
00:16:44Yep.
00:16:44That's exactly what I said.
00:16:46Come on, David.
00:16:46If you want me to help, I'm going to help.
00:16:48I got you.
00:16:49But I'm just saying, I don't get it, Izzo.
00:16:52Like, why now?
00:16:54What do you mean?
00:16:54Well, you've known all this time that you haven't gotten into a fight.
00:16:57It hasn't bothered you before.
00:16:59Or at least it hasn't bothered you enough to do anything about it.
00:17:01So, what's changed?
00:17:06The Mona Lisa changed everything.
00:17:10Okay, class.
00:17:11Ten more minutes to finish recreating the Mona Lisa.
00:17:14I don't know, ma'am.
00:17:14This feels like way too difficult of an assignment.
00:17:17I'm just substituting Sereni, okay?
00:17:18The most exciting part of my day today
00:17:20was getting breakfast for lunch in the cafeteria.
00:17:23Just do the best you can.
00:17:24Yo, holy shit.
00:17:32Miguel got a boner.
00:17:33Yo, Miguel got a boner for Mona Lisa.
00:17:36No, no.
00:17:36No, I don't.
00:17:37It's just, it's my pants.
00:17:39My jeans are stretched over my belt.
00:17:41Please stop pressing your penis, Mr. Perez.
00:17:43Adrian, cut that.
00:17:44It's just a belt.
00:17:45Oh, shit.
00:17:46Mona Lisa's taking his pants off now.
00:17:48Adrian, stop saying Mona Lisa.
00:17:49So, go over there and compose yourself.
00:17:52Stop smiling.
00:17:53I can see you.
00:17:53Mona Lisa.
00:17:55Mona Lisa.
00:17:59Mona Lisa.
00:18:01But it wasn't a boner.
00:18:02It was just one pants.
00:18:03It's fine, it's fine.
00:18:04It's a very erotic picture.
00:18:06Dude.
00:18:07Okay, so, we need to establish the parameters first.
00:18:10We need a framework here.
00:18:11We need rules.
00:18:12Ooh, like fight club.
00:18:13Hmm.
00:18:15What's that?
00:18:16Okay, Miguel is obviously not a bully, right?
00:18:19He's a good person.
00:18:20Which means the first rule is,
00:18:21Miguel can only fight someone who deserves it.
00:18:24You can't just pick some kid indiscriminately the way a bully would.
00:18:27There needs to be some kind of justice involved.
00:18:29I like that.
00:18:29I kind of like that, too.
00:18:30I like that.
00:18:30Who's going to make this good?
00:18:31Right?
00:18:31Yeah.
00:18:31Okay, I got one.
00:18:33If you want to fight someone,
00:18:35Miguel can't throw the first punch.
00:18:36Yeah.
00:18:37Why can't I throw the first punch?
00:18:38Okay, think about it.
00:18:39The process of getting into a fight
00:18:40is just as important as the actual fight.
00:18:42That pre-fight buildup is where all your energy increases
00:18:44and your adrenaline hits
00:18:45and your heart gets going
00:18:46and your blood gets hot
00:18:47and your dick gets hard for the Mona Lisa.
00:18:49Come on.
00:18:49One more rule.
00:18:50Stay away from Damien Delgado.
00:19:03Hey!
00:19:05Hey!
00:19:07Shit.
00:19:09Hey, take it easy.
00:19:11Oh, my God.
00:19:12Just take it easy.
00:19:13Just take it easy.
00:19:14Oh, my God.
00:19:15Oh, my God.
00:19:16Oh, my God.
00:19:20Obviously, I'm not going to fight Damien Delgado.
00:19:24It's Adrian.
00:19:26That's who I'm going to fight.
00:19:27Yeah, now Adrian is leaning fast.
00:19:29Right.
00:19:31So?
00:19:32So.
00:19:32So you're about to get into a fight
00:19:34and you need to be prepared.
00:19:36You need strategy.
00:19:37Like...
00:19:37Like Bruce Lee.
00:19:42Holy shit.
00:19:43I've been sponging this up for years,
00:19:45fighting by osmosis.
00:19:46I mean, I might be an accidental master.
00:19:48Maybe.
00:19:49Probably not.
00:19:50But maybe.
00:19:51Look, I want you to imagine the fight.
00:19:53The best fighters visualize their victories beforehand.
00:19:56They see themselves winning, so they win.
00:19:57They also win because it's their job
00:19:59and they train for it
00:20:00and they get paid to do it.
00:20:01And they're not motivated by erection vengeance.
00:20:03Bruce Lee was motivated to stop prostitution
00:20:05and enter the dragon.
00:20:06I mean, so they both kind of involve erections, David.
00:20:09See, that's good.
00:20:09Use all of this, okay?
00:20:11Now, close your eyes
00:20:13and enter that dragon.
00:20:15Okay.
00:20:15Okay.
00:20:16Okay.
00:20:16Okay.
00:20:16Okay.
00:20:16Let's go.
00:20:46Let's go.
00:20:58Holy shit.
00:20:59Miguel got a bone.
00:21:12Why are you dressed like the chick from Kill Bill?
00:21:16It's from Game of Death, stupid.
00:21:18A little tight around the cross, bro.
00:21:20Let's go.
00:21:22Let's go.
00:21:24Let's go.
00:21:26Let's go.
00:21:28Let's go.
00:21:30Let's go.
00:21:32Let's go.
00:21:34Let's go.
00:21:36Let's go.
00:21:38Let's go.
00:21:40Let's go.
00:21:42Let's go.
00:21:44Let's go.
00:21:46Let's go.
00:21:48Let's go.
00:21:50Why are you punching him in the butt?
00:22:08Hey, watch out!
00:22:20I've spared you because I'm a good person.
00:22:43I'm kind of boner right now.
00:22:46It was not a boner!
00:22:56You did it, Miguel!
00:23:06I think that worked.
00:23:08I'm ready.
00:23:09Look, bro, just so it's said one more time, you don't have to do this if you don't want
00:23:21to, bro.
00:23:22Yeah, I hear you, but I'm going to go fist to fury on this guy like Bruce Lee and Jet Li
00:23:27versions.
00:23:28All right.
00:23:29Well, make sure to keep your head moving.
00:23:31You all set?
00:23:32Yep.
00:23:33I ate a muffin this morning.
00:23:34What kind?
00:23:35Blueberry.
00:23:36Good, good.
00:23:37That's the strongest of all the muffins.
00:23:38What's the point here?
00:23:39Well, I usually see Adrian at the third period, so that's when I'll try him.
00:23:42I always see him in the hallway with his friends being all like...
00:23:45Handsome?
00:23:46Not for long.
00:23:47Oh my God, I love it.
00:23:48Good morning, everyone.
00:23:49And in this corner, the best friend, the toughest guy in Syracuse, he is so tough, Miguel!
00:23:59Now remember, when calculating velocity must take into fact the mass of the base of the
00:24:11custom man and the man himself...
00:24:12Types of creative writing include poetry, plays, personal essays, blah, blah, blah, blah,
00:24:17creative writing include poetry, plays, personal essays, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.
00:24:25Hey, Miguel, are you going to beat his ass?
00:24:30Yes.
00:24:35I got to go, Ms. Rodriguez.
00:24:37We're getting to Lord of the Files in the next class.
00:24:40Watch his eyes, right?
00:24:41You got it, bro.
00:24:42I'm about to drop this handsome bitch.
00:24:44If he steps with that left foot forward, be careful of that quick jab.
00:24:47If he steps with that left foot forward, he's going to get punched the fuck out.
00:24:51Ooh, there he is.
00:24:53Yo, I thought y'all were playing, but he is for real handsome.
00:25:00And now, entering the ring, a bored fighter who always has his best friend's back.
00:25:09And just like I was saying earlier, he's the toughest guy in Syracuse.
00:25:13Ladies and gentlemen, let's get ready to...
00:25:17Oh, what the fuck, bro?
00:25:22What?
00:25:23Oh, shit.
00:25:25You got a cast?
00:25:27Bonalisa, what's up, man?
00:25:29Still getting horny in class?
00:25:31Want to stop my cast?
00:25:34Bonalisa.
00:25:35So now what?
00:25:38You can still fight him.
00:25:39You can't fight a kid with a broken arm.
00:25:41Yeah, sure you can.
00:25:42A broken leg, that's off limits.
00:25:43A broken neck, that's a no-go.
00:25:45But a broken arm...
00:25:46I mean, if you really think about it, that thing is kind of like an advantage for Adrian.
00:25:49That thing's like a weapon.
00:25:50You kind of owe it to your classmates to beat his ass.
00:25:52He's dangerous.
00:25:53Nah, man, I'm out.
00:25:55Great.
00:25:55So just pick someone else.
00:25:57Ooh, boss.
00:25:58But, Miguel, we need to do some work on you.
00:26:02Just stop asking so many questions.
00:26:03You gotta focus.
00:26:04Wait, so what are we doing here?
00:26:06The problem is you're too nice.
00:26:09Well, being nice is good for, like, life.
00:26:11It's not good for fights.
00:26:12So we need to un-nice you, which is what we're doing here.
00:26:14This is the plan.
00:26:15So I'm gonna point to someone at random, and you have to be mean to them.
00:26:18Wait, but that seems like not that great of a plan.
00:26:20David, what do you think about this?
00:26:22I think that none of this has made any sense, man.
00:26:24But I also think I kind of want to see this one.
00:26:26Let's go!
00:26:27Oh, yeah!
00:26:28Let's find somebody.
00:26:31Hell no.
00:26:32You guys crazy?
00:26:33That's a grown man.
00:26:34He's probably got kids.
00:26:36I'll fight his kids.
00:26:37No, that's not our guy.
00:26:42No, no, no.
00:26:43You already said Damien's out.
00:26:44I guess it's gotta be the next person.
00:26:48That's our guy.
00:26:49That's the fuck.
00:26:50He's barely moving.
00:26:52He's maybe not even alive.
00:26:53He's you.
00:26:54That's old you.
00:26:55Y'all even dress alike.
00:26:57It's a back to the future situation.
00:26:58You gotta bully future you to save present you.
00:27:00No, no, no, Serenie.
00:27:01Back to the future doesn't work that way.
00:27:03You gotta do it.
00:27:04You feel the way that you're recoiling from the idea?
00:27:06That's how you know you have to do it.
00:27:08That's how you know it's gonna make you unnice.
00:27:09Then you'll be ready to fight.
00:27:10I'm annoyed by how much sense this makes.
00:27:13Fine.
00:27:14Fine.
00:27:15Fine.
00:27:16Go over there and say to him exactly what's written down on this paper.
00:27:20That's good.
00:27:20That's good.
00:27:21That's good.
00:27:22That's good.
00:27:22That's good.
00:27:23Just be mean.
00:27:24Unnice yourself.
00:27:25Gotta be unnice.
00:27:26Let's go.
00:27:27Manager to register two.
00:27:29Manager to register two.
00:27:31Oh, shit.
00:27:33Oh, my God.
00:27:35Can you help me with the origin brand?
00:27:37Please.
00:27:38It's too heavy.
00:27:42Not that one.
00:27:43The other one right there.
00:27:44This one.
00:27:45Oh, no.
00:27:46Wait a minute.
00:27:46Never mind.
00:27:46Give me that one better.
00:27:47Yeah.
00:27:49Yes, mijo.
00:27:50Thank you, mijo.
00:27:54Sweet.
00:27:54Don't do it.
00:28:00Sir?
00:28:02Yes, mijo.
00:28:05I, uh, fuck you, you old bitch.
00:28:11Huh?
00:28:14Fuck you, you old bitch.
00:28:18I'm still kidding.
00:28:19I'm going to spell the volume.
00:28:23Fuck you, you old bitch!
00:28:25What the hell?
00:28:31You screamed it.
00:28:33Why'd you say it's a last night?
00:28:34Oh, stringy.
00:28:40What, what, what, what, what, what, what's more, whiff?
00:28:42I can hear you.
00:28:42I can hear you.
00:28:42I can hear you.
00:28:42I can hear you.
00:28:43I can hear you.
00:28:45I'm so cool.
00:28:50I'm so cool.
00:28:52I got it now.
00:28:53What, what, what, what, what's more, whiff?
00:28:56Hey, look at you, getting cut.
00:28:59Hey, look at this.
00:29:00Delete the evidence, bro.
00:29:02Oh, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck.
00:29:04They don't want to date me.
00:29:05They probably want to beat me.
00:29:07Team Miguel.
00:29:07David.
00:29:08Frini.
00:29:09What?
00:29:10What?
00:29:11Tell me, y'all.
00:29:12It's only a matter of time on that wall face.
00:29:14Look at me.
00:29:15Look at me.
00:29:16Look at me.
00:29:17Look at me.
00:29:17It's only a matter of time.
00:29:19I need this whole section.
00:29:22Yo, yo, Kat, Frini, do we go kick it in Miguel?
00:29:24Oh, wait, chill, chill, chill.
00:29:25Um, I'll meet you guys at the cage.
00:29:27Yeah, yeah, yeah.
00:29:28Yeah, I'll be right there.
00:29:29Bye.
00:29:30Bye.
00:29:30Bye.
00:29:31Bye.
00:29:31Bye.
00:29:31Bye.
00:29:32Bye.
00:29:33Bye.
00:29:33Bye.
00:29:34Bye.
00:29:35Bye.
00:29:35Bye.
00:29:36Bye.
00:29:36Bye.
00:29:49Bye.
00:29:50Bye.
00:29:54Always the four of you.
00:29:56I remember when you all first started hanging out together.
00:29:59You were all these tiny little things.
00:30:01Babies, really.
00:30:04It's okay to be upset about leaving.
00:30:06You know that, right?
00:30:07I'm fine, okay?
00:30:08Everything is...
00:30:10It's fine.
00:30:11Okay.
00:30:12Good.
00:30:12I'm glad.
00:30:14How'd your friends take it when you told them you were leaving?
00:30:17I'm gonna tell them, but I just...
00:30:19Not yet.
00:30:20Why?
00:30:22Because once I tell them, then it becomes something that's actually true.
00:30:25I know it's hard, but it's better now than later.
00:30:28When you bottle up your feelings and you keep secrets away from the people that you care about,
00:30:33they can explode.
00:30:34Make you do crazy things.
00:30:35Yeah.
00:30:36Like set a trash can on fire and throw it to the windshield of your first boyfriend's car,
00:30:39who you freaking caught cheating.
00:30:41Mom, mom, mom.
00:30:43Right.
00:30:44But you should tell them.
00:30:46Tonight.
00:30:47Yeah.
00:30:49You know what?
00:30:50You're right.
00:30:52I'm going to go tell them right now.
00:30:55I know who I'm fighting.
00:30:56Kevin Troy.
00:30:57Kevin Troy?
00:30:58The Air Morgans guy?
00:30:59Who?
00:31:00The Air Morgans guy.
00:31:03So it's the day after my birthday.
00:31:06I'm wearing the new Nike high tops that my mom got me.
00:31:09It's those red and black Jordans.
00:31:10The main ones.
00:31:11The band ones.
00:31:12I'm a king at school.
00:31:14I'm walking through the hallway and people are giving me high fives and shouting my name
00:31:17because of how awesome these shoes are.
00:31:20I mean, a teacher tried to kiss me.
00:31:22It's crazy.
00:31:23This all sounds fake, but I don't care.
00:31:25Lie to me.
00:31:26So it's P.E.
00:31:28Kids all around me.
00:31:29I'm feeling great.
00:31:30I hear a rumor that I might get voted homecoming king.
00:31:32It's all breaking my way.
00:31:34Shoes look remarkable.
00:31:35And that's when Kevin Troy walks up.
00:31:37Hey, Miguel.
00:31:39I say, what's up, Kev?
00:31:40His name's Kevin, but I've called him Kev even though I've never talked to him before
00:31:43because that's just how good I was feeling.
00:31:45Kev is looking down at my feet like he's real curious about my shoes.
00:31:48And I'm like, nice, right?
00:31:49Count for my birthday.
00:31:50I can ask my mom where she got them from if he wanted a pair.
00:31:54And that's when it all fell apart.
00:31:56Hey, yo.
00:31:57Come check out these fake-ass Jordans.
00:31:59Because here's the part I didn't tell anyone.
00:32:01The shoes were fake.
00:32:02My mom got them from the flea market.
00:32:04The little Jordan on there wasn't even dunking it.
00:32:06He was laying it up.
00:32:08The swoosh was actually a check mark.
00:32:10Shoes don't even say Air Jordan on them.
00:32:13I swear to God, they said Air Morgan.
00:32:17Look at that.
00:32:18Oh, my God.
00:32:19Your mom doesn't love you.
00:32:19You know what a swoosh looks like?
00:32:20A swoosh goes swoosh.
00:32:25Honestly?
00:32:26I don't know why I didn't pick him in the first place.
00:32:28He should have been my first pick.
00:32:29You know what?
00:32:30Let's scout this thing.
00:32:32Kevin is a little older than you.
00:32:33Kevin knows more than you.
00:32:35He's slightly a better fighter than you.
00:32:36So he's...
00:32:37Morpheus and the Matrix.
00:32:40Yeah, that feels a little...
00:32:42Is that racist?
00:32:43Because they're both black?
00:32:44Maybe a little...
00:32:45One, he knows more than me.
00:32:47Two, he's a better fighter than me.
00:32:49So you know who that makes me?
00:32:51Neo.
00:32:52Kevin probably loves the Matrix.
00:32:54Is that bad?
00:32:54Everybody loves the Matrix.
00:32:55I'm on Miguel's side, okay?
00:32:56Everything Kevin Troy does is stupid.
00:32:59Look, you know what to do.
00:33:00Just close your eyes and visualize it.
00:33:03Jack yourself in, Neo.
00:33:05This is a sparring program.
00:33:13Similar to the program reality of the Matrix.
00:33:16It has the same basic rules.
00:33:18Some of them can be bent.
00:33:19Others can be broken.
00:33:21You understand?
00:33:23Then hit me.
00:33:25If you can.
00:33:26You know what to do.
00:33:27You know what to do.
00:33:28You know what to do.
00:33:28You know what to do.
00:33:29You know what to do.
00:33:29You know what to do.
00:33:30You know what to do.
00:33:31You know what to do.
00:33:31You know what to do.
00:33:32You know what to do.
00:33:32You know what to do.
00:33:33You know what to do.
00:33:33You know what to do.
00:33:34You know what to do.
00:33:35You know what to do.
00:33:35You know what to do.
00:33:36You know what to do.
00:33:36You know what to do.
00:33:37You know what to do.
00:33:37You know what to do.
00:33:38You know what to do.
00:33:39You know what to do.
00:33:40You know what to do.
00:33:41You know what to do.
00:33:42You know what to do.
00:33:43You know what to do.
00:33:44You know what to do.
00:33:45Good. Adaptation. Improvisation.
00:34:08You cloned yourself.
00:34:10But will you give up your true self to defeat me?
00:34:15Eat shit, Captain Troy!
00:34:22Why did I beat you?
00:34:24Do you think me being a better fighter has anything to do with this place?
00:34:29Do you think those are Air Jordans you were wearing?
00:34:45Air Jordans.
00:34:54Air Jordans.
00:34:59Ah.
00:35:03when do you see kevin in the morning we have the math prep thing in the morning it's tuesday
00:35:15remember shit i forgot about that can we like maybe schedule a different time for that
00:35:20yeah um yeah okay uh i think i'm still gonna go to the meeting and i think you should too
00:35:26you'll probably finish the time to find kevin anyways or better yet you won't and then you
00:35:31don't pick a fight for no reason at all awesome see how excited everyone is fuck yeah
00:35:38um no i've never dated an idiot guy no reason hey hey all right oh you're wearing the mortgage
00:36:01nice touch little circle
00:36:03yo yo did i miss the big fight not yet there's kevin
00:36:11all right bro i should go south i'm jumping in no dude i got this stay back so it's just me
00:36:20oh i like that confidence all right tough guy i got a strong walk going on
00:36:26all right so far so good
00:36:33guys this shit might happen today fuck him up all right come on miguel
00:36:39what's happening
00:36:44why is he taking a selfie with the air morgan
00:36:49just taking a real left turn
00:36:51oh my god i can't keep watching this he tried to dap him and he acted like he was pulling a sword on
00:36:59so he reached out his hand to dap you up and you flinched
00:37:06i switched your full body flinched it was like a whole thing dude what happened
00:37:11i accidentally made friends with him how the fuck do you accidentally make friends with someone you're
00:37:16supposed to fight i don't know he's very charming okay talk to you later bro y'all through seven
00:37:24so he actually recognized the air morgan's because his parents got him the same ones
00:37:28so he apologized but then i told him that i was gonna fight him like i was neo and he was morpheus
00:37:33in the matrix in the dojo scene but it wasn't because he was black why would you why would you
00:37:36actually say that to him i gotta go to class
00:37:47bro i know you had to get your mind right and all but
00:37:49what the fuck dude that test prep this morning sucked man they just start talking about equations
00:37:54and it's like my brain just falls out of my nose so here's what i was thinking for this next page
00:38:01yo do you not want to do this anymore bro yeah i still want to fight why do you keep trying to
00:38:06talk me out of it i'm not trying to talk you out of it man i'm just trying to do this math
00:38:10oh right yeah sorry i just uh can we pick this up after school tomorrow please sure but the test
00:38:19day's friday so no i know i'm just uh oh casem's senior downstairs look man i know this is just a
00:38:28practice test but it does determine what sat course you get placed in and if i crush this we'll be in
00:38:34the same classes next semester the whole way and we could just study together man right yeah i got you
00:38:40don't worry about it come on what's going on i just i really want to get this fight done i still don't
00:38:53get why you want to do the fight thing who cares i mean they care but they only care because they
00:38:57love mayhem they're the killmongers of our friend group look at this bro you're done a kick's not
00:39:03impressive that's not an impressive never recovering who's black panther i got the dead
00:39:08dad so me i guess you could be sherry though or that white guy normally i'm fine being someone else but
00:39:18i need to be black people this time all right i get it man i do my whole family i mean most of them
00:39:26are crazy but the one thing they can all talk about is boxing it's like the biggest thing my dad
00:39:33i mean you see what it's like when i go to the gym everybody wants to brag about how good he was
00:39:38it's like so what he's gone he's on his way home from the gym one day and someone runs a red that's it
00:39:50i don't know like how am i supposed to accept hey man armando what's up glad to have you back home
00:39:56where you belong free all right cool cool uh we'll talk more next time man
00:40:10ain't no disrespect to my man but this mother dead i'm keeping the lights on in this
00:40:15bitch how come my picture not up there you what did you say dude come on say that again that's my
00:40:20fucking dad alma okay
00:40:29you're 0 for 2 on fights so far yeah but you're one for two on making new friends
00:40:34i've been thinking blake white i think that's who i'm gonna try next because i always see him after
00:40:39school who is that what what did he do to you now you know blake he's the one whose sister oh that's
00:40:44right first of all that was like over a month ago and second of all she's fine and third of all he's
00:40:49a total dick all he does is make fun of people he's a bully hey dumbo you got a license to fly with
00:40:54those ears oh can't you hear me man i thought it had to be someone who did something specifically to
00:41:03you i'm ensuring egalitarianism like a superhero but you're more like peter parker before he becomes
00:41:09spider-man energy yeah the problem is you're still afraid of getting hit that's why you have flinched
00:41:13with kevin when he reached out you can't flinch that makes sense though you have never been hit in
00:41:18the face before and not knowing what that feels like is way worse than knowing what it feels like
00:41:22because it's a natural fear but it's not as bad as you think so just like we had done nice you
00:41:28now we gotta unflinch you and how's that well right right let's try again let's try it again okay
00:41:37ready let's go ready yeah that's so hot what the fuck cash had to be done no it did not it did because
00:41:48now you're mean enough to get into a fight and you know what to expect in a fight now you're really
00:41:54ready once again i'm annoyed by how much sense that makes
00:42:08hey what's up blake fuck off
00:42:10what the fuck i know it's fine it's gonna dry off bro don't cut me
00:42:36uh hey what the fuck is going on here
00:42:56oh
00:43:06stop stop stop can you stop
00:43:36oh
00:43:50what's this i watched some roast videos on youtube and i wrote some stuff down you're gonna read the
00:43:54blake that's your plan yeah i mean i was practicing all night this is solid okay you're on to go and
00:44:00don't let them get a word in right you're a flamethrower
00:44:10blake
00:44:12hey what's up why do you say this is alone
00:44:14i don't know but i like it
00:44:16you look like you threaten to call ice whenever something doesn't go your way at mexican restaurants
00:44:20at mexican restaurants do you look like you look like your family invented gentrification you look
00:44:27like you argue on the internet it's okay for white people to say the n-word man he's doing a lot of race
00:44:32stuff
00:44:34shouldn't you be sitting outside a home depot right now looking for work or helping your mom sell tamales in
00:44:40the parking lot of a grocery store
00:44:42oh that's why you did the gray stuff blake is racist yeah yeah you look like your dick
00:44:46probably called 911 on you because you were beating it too much
00:44:48oh well that one's not racist
00:44:50because you know mexicans lead the league in domestic violence
00:44:54ah there it is oh you want to put on a superhero and take a nap
00:45:02you know what
00:45:04fuck you blake i'm glad that your sister got into that car accident
00:45:08i'm glad that she broke both of those legs and i wish
00:45:10that she would have had a third leg so she could have broken a third one
00:45:18what the fuck bonalisa
00:45:24oh
00:45:40inating
00:45:42all right
00:45:44all right
00:45:46all right
00:45:49like
00:45:52I don't know.
00:46:22I need you to help me get into a fight.
00:46:41Okay.
00:46:45Okay.
00:46:46Okay.
00:46:47Okay.
00:46:48I just, uh, that's where all the trash goes, right?
00:47:16Get there on the floor.
00:47:23Hey, I'm Miguel.
00:47:24Nice to meet you.
00:47:25Okay.
00:47:26You want to learn how to fight?
00:47:29Ask your daddy.
00:47:31Okay.
00:47:32Not precisely, no.
00:47:34I need to get into a fight.
00:47:37So fight someone.
00:47:38I can't.
00:47:39Or, I mean, there's just rules that make it hard for me to do so.
00:47:43For example, I can't throw the first punch.
00:47:45I gotta get the other person to do it and I'm a good person, man.
00:47:49I'm Miguel.
00:47:52What the fuck are you talking about?
00:47:54Cass can explain it better.
00:47:55She's cool.
00:47:56You'll meet her one day.
00:47:57Oh, hurry up.
00:47:58Okay.
00:47:59Okay.
00:48:00Let's pretend it was literally impossible for me to throw the first punch.
00:48:02And I know that that sounds dumb, but let's just, let's say that's the scenario.
00:48:06But I still want to get into a fight.
00:48:08So if that was the case, what would you tell me to do?
00:48:12That's easy.
00:48:13Make someone mad enough to punch you.
00:48:14Right.
00:48:15Yes.
00:48:16How do I do that?
00:48:17Call him a pussy.
00:48:18Tell him to suck your dick.
00:48:19Get loud.
00:48:20Get in his face.
00:48:21Shit like that.
00:48:22I don't consent to that, man.
00:48:23I don't want to tell anyone to suck my dick.
00:48:24I think that's just like a problematic thing to say and I'm much more of a, it's just,
00:48:27it's not me.
00:48:28I don't care.
00:48:29So just stick to calling him a pussy, although I find it curious that you don't think that's
00:48:33problematic.
00:48:34I tried that shit talking thing and it just, it didn't work out.
00:48:37The guy started crying and the girl was in the wheelchair.
00:48:40You talk shit to a girl in the wheelchair?
00:48:42She's just in the wheelchair temporarily, not permanently.
00:48:45Her legs are just, they're broken.
00:48:46They're not missing, man.
00:48:47Just to circle back, you're a good person?
00:48:49Yeah.
00:48:50Huh.
00:48:51Let me, um, let me run something by you and maybe this will help.
00:48:57Okay.
00:48:58Okay.
00:48:59Maybe you're a bad person.
00:49:01Dude, just listen.
00:49:03All the stuff you just said, bad person stuff.
00:49:07I mean, even the thing about not swinging first, you might not throw the first punch,
00:49:11but you're still forcing that person into a situation which is just as bad.
00:49:14And if that's the case, if you're a bad person, then who cares about the rules?
00:49:21If you want to fight, fight.
00:49:23Fight.
00:49:24Cheers.
00:49:25Cheers, fellas.
00:49:26Cheers, fellas.
00:49:27Cheers, fellas!
00:49:28Again, and definitely the same without you.
00:49:29What?
00:49:30No, no, no, no, no, no no, no.
00:49:32Hey.
00:49:33no no no no no no hey what is going on files are throwing me a little goodbye party where
00:49:47you've been i've been calling your phone you haven't been answering i was at armando's
00:49:50what were you doing there we were talking about how to get into a fight get into a fight
00:49:54what the hell's going on what's going on yeah well let's see i'm moving my parents gave me
00:50:02no warning not even a hey miguel just a heads up your whole life might get uprooted my dad thinks
00:50:07that i'm a coward hold on a second no dad it's true oh my god okay i gotta go because they're
00:50:16about to get here and they cannot see this
00:50:18miguel
00:50:19hey let's go around the back because my dad and i are just fighting right now a lot of
00:50:35that going on with you it seems somehow also none of it going on with you but don't worry
00:50:39i know you're gonna fight fucking bitch no i am not gonna fight a girl okay claudia dominguez
00:50:45is taller than you claudia dominguez is faster than you claudia dominguez is stronger than
00:50:49you so physically she has the advantage on you but she's also a fucking thief and you're
00:50:52gonna fight her give me my phone it was just on the table now it's not on the table anymore
00:50:55i'm not doing it okay we're done talking about this what about me says that i would ever do
00:51:03something like that well i just want to point out three hours ago you made fun of a girl with
00:51:07shattered legs to her face so i mean that part no i first of all i didn't see her okay she was
00:51:12below eyeline she was at wheel height that doesn't make it better that might make it worse
00:51:17you know what it's actually a little sexist that you won't even consider the idea of fighting claudia
00:51:21look she's gonna throw the first punch for sure and you won't get in trouble because you'll be
00:51:25defending yourself and you'll have three witnesses to testify in that fact this is our green light
00:51:31it's a matter of honor please be the half mexican half puerto rican samurai that i know you are
00:51:38what other choice do you have fuck right let's go fuck her you're gonna get your phone back
00:51:45i'm getting my phone back bitch yeehaw now just close your eyes and fuck that bitch up
00:51:51so
00:51:57Here we go!
00:52:25Bro!
00:52:27Why are you dressed like that?
00:52:28We're doing crouching thing at it!
00:52:29You bailed on me man!
00:52:33Oh my god!
00:52:43Hey David leave a message.
00:52:47Hey bro, I completely forgot.
00:52:51I'm sorry.
00:52:54Mmm.
00:53:11Michael Carrera?
00:53:13Present.
00:53:14Oscar Diaz?
00:53:16Here.
00:53:18Claudia Dominguez?
00:53:21Claudia Dominguez?
00:53:23That girl's never gonna come to school.
00:53:26Estefany Fernandez?
00:53:27Here.
00:53:28Just fight Estefany, bro.
00:53:37Bro, you were really gonna fight Claudia?
00:53:39You should've picked someone with a better attendance record.
00:53:41Look, I know I've said this every time,
00:53:42but I'm so glad this one didn't happen.
00:53:45For different reasons, but obvious reasons.
00:53:48Me too, actually.
00:53:49What are you...
00:53:51How about let's meet at the cave tonight?
00:53:53Pick someone else.
00:53:54Yo, dude, what?
00:53:56The test is tomorrow and we still haven't got through the prep guide.
00:53:58Bro, it's a practice test. It doesn't even matter.
00:54:00It does to me.
00:54:02Look, if you don't want to help, fine,
00:54:03but don't start shitting on it because you're having a bad week.
00:54:06Fine, fine, fuck it.
00:54:07How about this? Let's pick someone else right now, okay?
00:54:09Him.
00:54:11Him.
00:54:12John?
00:54:13Yeah, it's John.
00:54:14John's like the nicest guy on earth.
00:54:15He has a live, laugh, love sign hanging in his locker room.
00:54:18Yeah, well, he's alive and I'm mad, so I assume I'm gonna fight.
00:54:20I'm gonna fuck him up.
00:54:21Well, he's bicycling peacefully away, so I guess tomorrow...
00:54:24I mean...
00:54:26Pain.
00:54:29For everyone.
00:54:31Fuck you.
00:54:32One Punch Miguel!
00:54:35Oh, my God.
00:54:39Cassian Srini, I have something for you.
00:54:44Pee!
00:54:45Oh!
00:54:46Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha!
00:54:47Ah!
00:54:48Miguel!
00:54:50Ah!
00:54:55Nice try, David.
00:54:56But it's a little more...
00:54:58Like this!
00:54:59Oh!
00:55:01Oh!
00:55:03Put it next to Sofia's stuff in the truck.
00:55:17Oh, my God.
00:55:22Yeah.
00:55:23Maybe we should have done that before we decided.
00:55:26Yeah, so I take this one in, and I think we're gonna have the truck.
00:55:30One is the next one.
00:55:43You're from Los Quartos.
00:55:44And out of Los Quartos,
00:55:45and even our clothes.
00:55:46And our clothes.
00:55:47And so I just started.
00:55:54I think that's a good one here.
00:55:54Good job.
00:55:55Good job.
00:55:58Mr. Perez.
00:56:00Mr. Perez.
00:56:02Oh, hey. Good to have you back.
00:56:04Would you like to keep reading with us?
00:56:07Yeah, sure.
00:56:10Chapter one.
00:56:11That's the wrong page, Miguel.
00:56:14Uh-huh. Don't look at this. Back up.
00:56:16All right. Chapter four.
00:56:19Also the wrong page.
00:56:20Okay, what page are we on?
00:56:21Well, you would know that if you were actually paying attention and reading along with the class.
00:56:25Yeah, of course, but as we both know, that wasn't happening.
00:56:27So can we just leave me the hell alone about it?
00:56:32You were in the clear before you ran your mouth and said that.
00:56:35Should I email your mom and dad about this?
00:56:37Or perhaps you and I should further discuss this at lunch detention.
00:56:41I do not want to sit here and watch you eat another sad tuna sandwich or whatever.
00:56:46Wow. Today and Monday. Lunch detention.
00:56:49No, no, no. Today. No, not today. Please. I can't today.
00:56:52You can't?
00:56:53Okay. I understand.
00:56:55Doesn't work for you?
00:56:57Then it's definitely going to be today.
00:57:06The sandwich stinks today, by the way.
00:57:07Leave me. Yes, Miguel.
00:57:23Can I please go to the bathroom?
00:57:25Definitely no.
00:57:26No.
00:57:26No.
00:57:26Pat. You're like a cat.
00:57:50What's going on with you, Miguel?
00:57:59You're one of my best students.
00:58:00Not the typical ones that make me want to quit teaching.
00:58:03Que te pasa?
00:58:03Huh?
00:58:04Huh?
00:58:15Who are you, Johnny Dwight?
00:58:30Fuck.
00:58:37Watch where you're going, motherfucker.
00:58:42Get out of my way, man.
00:58:43No.
00:58:48What the fuck you say to me?
00:58:49I said you move, you big, dumb fuck.
00:58:59Fuck you, man.
00:59:00Fuck you, man.
00:59:22Give it to the bathroom.
00:59:24Fuck you, man.
00:59:25Dude, you are so lucky Mrs. Rodriguez likes you, they ended up blaming the whole thing on Damien, so.
00:59:36Should we recap some of the stuff that's happened this week?
00:59:38Bro, can we please not?
00:59:39You pissed off the oldest man in America in a grocery store.
00:59:42You unintentionally made friends with a guy you wanted to fight.
00:59:44You got punched in the face by a cast.
00:59:45You made fun of a girl in a wheelchair.
00:59:47And you tried to fight Damien Delgado, but it ended with you accidentally punching your English teacher in the boob.
00:59:51Do I have that right?
00:59:51Yeah, good thing the week's over.
00:59:53Who knows what you would have did if you had another day.
00:59:54You might have hit a nun with a brick, threw a baby in a lake.
00:59:58I can't believe you swung on Damien Delgado.
01:00:01Man, I don't know, okay? Armando was in my head.
01:00:04Armando?
01:00:05Yeah, am I a bad person? He said that I was, and I just...
01:00:08Wait, bro, you talked to Armando? When?
01:00:11After the Blake thing. What you guys were telling me wasn't helping me get into a fight, so I figured he'd know something that y'all didn't.
01:00:17And you don't think that's a little fucked up?
01:00:19Whatever, man, it doesn't matter. I'm just glad this shit is over. It was stupid anyways.
01:00:23What?
01:00:25I'm just saying, like, I'm glad it didn't happen, because that's not you, bro. You're Miguel, man.
01:00:31Oh, what the fuck? You see me hurting, you know that I'm hurting, and now is when you choose to do one of your David Knows Better lessons?
01:00:38Dude, I've been so supportive of this dumb shit since it started.
01:00:41No, you haven't.
01:00:42Yes, I have. Even though I thought this shit was stupid, even though you bailed on me with the test prep stuff, even though we all saw that this was getting worse and worse, I've been here with you every time, watching you not fight someone, man.
01:00:55Fuck you, man. You pushed me, Miguel.
01:01:00I asked you for one thing. One.
01:01:02So did I, and because you couldn't be a friend for a fucking week, I probably failed the fucking test.
01:01:07A whole week wasted on this. Why? Because you've got some shit going on with your dad, or you're suddenly mad about something from years ago you don't even know.
01:01:15Bro, fuck that. It doesn't have to do with any of that, and don't you say shit about my dad. You don't know a thing.
01:01:19I know you're a fucking bitch. How about that? Your dad probably thinks you're a bitch, too.
01:01:23Oh, yeah? Well, let's go ask your dad what he thinks about you.
01:01:30Fuck you. Man, fuck you. Tell him that you're moving. Tell him.
01:01:35What?
01:01:36I know that you're fucking moving. I saw the boxes in the truck and your dad, and I fucking saw it.
01:01:44You're moving?
01:01:45Yes, yes, I'm moving, okay, in two days.
01:01:47My parents just told me last week, and now you can go fuck off.
01:01:51I probably would never see any of you again anyway.
01:01:56You knew you were moving and spent this whole week trying to fight?
01:02:02David, say something.
01:02:08No, man, fuck that guy.
01:02:17Dad.
01:02:38Dad.
01:02:38You know we're moving in two days, right?
01:02:44You should probably start putting stuff into these boxes, because you know that's how boxes work.
01:02:48You have to put stuff in them.
01:02:51I assume you told the crew we're moving by now.
01:02:55Yeah.
01:02:55But it doesn't matter.
01:02:59Probably not going to be friends anymore anyway.
01:03:02I said some real foul stuff to David, and everything just feels like mud right now.
01:03:09You know you can still be friends after we move, right?
01:03:11What did you say to David?
01:03:18Dad, why are you always asking about David?
01:03:20Ask about me.
01:03:22I'm your son.
01:03:23I'm sorry that I'm not what you want me to be.
01:03:25I tried this whole week, and all I did was just make things more terrible.
01:03:29What do you mean you tried?
01:03:30Remember last weekend when Srini got into that fight?
01:03:35I didn't jump in.
01:03:36Everyone else did, and I didn't, so they started making fun of me about it, and then I come back home,
01:03:42and you tell me that we're moving, and that I'm too much of a coward to live in this neighborhood.
01:03:47So you had that.
01:03:47You kind of did.
01:03:49Hey, Miguel, we're going to move to a nice neighborhood.
01:03:52You're going to be much more comfortable.
01:03:54That's not what I meant.
01:03:54I just, I thought that maybe if I get into a fight and make you want to stay here,
01:04:04that we wouldn't have to move and my friends would respect me because I'm just, I'm saying it out loud right now,
01:04:13and it just sounds really dumb, but it made sense to me.
01:04:19Listen to me, Miguel.
01:04:20Miguel, we're moving to a nicer neighborhood, yes, but we're moving because it's a nicer neighborhood.
01:04:28It has nothing to do with you, at least not in the way that you're thinking.
01:04:33When you're a parent, you owe a responsibility to your children.
01:04:37You want to make things better for them than they were for you.
01:04:40That's what that's about.
01:04:44That's what I meant.
01:04:45Your mom with this job, she has an opportunity to provide that for us.
01:04:52I know that she always wanted me to be just like you, to be in the gym, but that's just not me.
01:05:02And I know that David and his dad had it, but we don't.
01:05:05I love that you like your own things, son.
01:05:14I love that you're your own person.
01:05:16Maybe you don't see it now, but one day you're going to realize that you're that way
01:05:19because you grew up in a house with two parents who love you.
01:05:23David lost one of his parents.
01:05:26I know he carries that weight.
01:05:28I see it in him.
01:05:29Because I've been friends since you were five years old.
01:05:32It's a lot of years of friendship.
01:05:33I know it's not going to be easy to leave your friends behind.
01:05:38I know.
01:05:42But you're going to be okay, son.
01:05:45I promise you.
01:05:47I promise.
01:06:03I promise.
01:06:04I promise.
01:06:13I promise.
01:06:44Hey, what's up, Cass?
01:06:49Can you do me a favor?
01:06:53Hey, Big J's still outside.
01:06:55Big J's up, like the NBA.
01:06:57Yo, yo.
01:06:59Hey.
01:07:00What's going on, y'all?
01:07:02Not much, but also a little.
01:07:07Hey, bro.
01:07:09Nah, man, what the fuck?
01:07:10I know, man, but Luke.
01:07:11I would not have come if I knew his ass was going to be here.
01:07:13Okay, okay, okay, wait, wait, wait, wait, okay.
01:07:14You can't leave like that.
01:07:16Y'all gotta make this right.
01:07:17Y'all owe it to each other.
01:07:18Nah, fuck that.
01:07:19You owe it to us.
01:07:20Y'all aren't the only two in this friendship.
01:07:21You don't get to ruin it for everybody.
01:07:23There are four parts to this.
01:07:24Four.
01:07:25Not two.
01:07:26Four.
01:07:26The leader.
01:07:27The really nice one.
01:07:28The really hot one.
01:07:29My crush.
01:07:30I'm sorry?
01:07:31What?
01:07:32Clearly, I'm into you, Cass.
01:07:33That was not clearly.
01:07:34Nothing was clear.
01:07:35Hey, look who it is.
01:07:37Indian Curry's back.
01:07:40This fucking guy again.
01:07:42Hey, where's the wagon you used to carry around the bottom of your face?
01:07:45Surprised you showed back up after I put you in the dirt last week?
01:07:49What's that thing about Indian religions believing in reincarnation?
01:07:53I guess that's true.
01:07:54Fuck off, dude.
01:07:55Relax, Mike Tyson.
01:07:57I'm not talking to you.
01:07:58It's not even an insult.
01:07:59Bro, take that bullshit somewhere else.
01:08:01This is where I took it.
01:08:02I took it right here.
01:08:32It wasn't that bad, right?
01:08:55No, no, it was fine.
01:08:56No, they suck.
01:08:58They've been assholes since they did one.
01:09:00I know.
01:09:01You know what I mean?
01:09:01Oh, it's six pounds now.
01:09:03Does it hurt?
01:09:03It's fine.
01:09:04No, it's good.
01:09:04It's good.
01:09:05You look tough.
01:09:06I don't know.
01:09:06It's tough for you.
01:09:07Okay.
01:09:10Well?
01:09:13Well, what?
01:09:14How did you like it, bro?
01:09:15Your first fight.
01:09:16Bro, it fucking sucked.
01:09:21Yeah.
01:09:21Horrible.
01:09:22I saw you got a clean one in there, though.
01:09:23Mm-hmm.
01:09:24Save me.
01:09:28Listen, I, uh...
01:09:30Well, what I said to you was...
01:09:34How do you mean it?
01:09:39I just...
01:09:40Miguel, I know.
01:09:45Me too.
01:09:49So, uh, you're, like, really moving then?
01:09:53Tomorrow, bro.
01:09:54I'm gonna miss you, bro.
01:09:59Like, for real.
01:10:01I miss you too, bro.
01:10:08You know, you gotta be gentle.
01:10:09Oh, shit.
01:10:10Oh, shit.
01:10:10Gentle, gentle, gentle, gentle, gentle.
01:10:12Those motherfuckers act like he's being sent off to war or something.
01:10:16He's just going to Albany.
01:10:17It's, like, two hours away.
01:10:18You know how far it is?
01:10:19It's not that far.
01:10:20It's not that far.
01:10:20Let's get out of here.
01:10:21Can we watch your movie tonight?
01:10:22Bah!
01:10:23What?
01:10:23Larry Turd.
01:10:25What?
01:10:26Larry Turd.
01:10:27That's what I could have called it.
01:10:28That's a good one.
01:10:28Oh, that's a good one.
01:10:29No, wait.
01:10:30Hold on, hold on, hold on.
01:10:30You should have said Donovan Bichel.
01:10:33Plays for the Utah Jits.
01:10:36Oh, wait, wait.
01:10:37Draymond P.
01:10:38Yeah, yeah.
01:10:39Oh, change it up.
01:10:40Oh, that's a booboo.
01:10:41Oh, that's a booboo.
01:10:42You ought to sit and come in your home.
01:10:45No, no, no, no, come on.
01:10:47No, no, come on.
01:10:48This motherfucker stop.
01:10:49Esta sequestrilla, yo quiero mojarte.
01:10:51Tu cuerpo es arte, déjame pintarte.
01:10:54Basar mi tinta por partes distintas.
01:10:57Repetimos y borramos cinta.
01:10:58Vamos fumando de culebra maya.
01:11:01El blonquearte y un par de medallas.
01:11:03DJ no falla, vamos pa' la playa,
01:11:06traete las toallas.
01:11:07Kaquito el mundo se va a mojar.
01:11:09And if you want water, let me be, mojate, and then if we get the salt, let me be, and if you want water, let me be, mojate, and then if we get the salt, let me be.
01:11:28Sana, gurita, tengo sal, esto es pa' pecar, esto es pa' mojar a las nenas, sana, gurita, tengo sal, busca el mezcal, esto es pa' curar todas las penas.
01:11:48Diablo, mami, todo ese estudio en ese mini bikini yo me zambullo a veces, trato de pichar y no mirar, pero tu cara es perfecta y tu cuerpo fenomenal, no sé si tú eres real o ya estoy mal como Don Quijote, viendo gigante ese culote de cocote al bote, hasta los sacerdotes dicen, Dios te bendiga cuando ven tu escote y vamos a perrear en la gasolinera,
01:12:10mientras llenamos de cerveza en la nevera, frías como Rusia, pero en playa santa, hasta playa sucia, llegan las de Atlanta, ya dice que aguanta, yo estoy puesto pa' esto, gigantesco, aquí como la vida, si pesco, tengo el pesto pa' perrear lento como seco y nos mojamos pa' coger fresco, capis?
01:12:27Y si tú quieres agua, dale, bebé, mojate y después, si pescamos que la sal no sane.
01:12:38Y si tú quieres agua, dale, bebé, mojate y después, si pescamos que la sal no sane.
01:12:46Y si dale hasta abajo es pecado, entonces tira en piedra, que mejor que un perreo hippie en Riviera, después termina la encagua, o mejor debajo el agua, vámonos de tour de Bayro a Tario Grande, deja que baje el tapón, vámonos más tarde, así, fácil, se nos hace fluir, Island, Libby, Marisal, la receta pa' mí, un paraíso pa' nosotros, di que quieres hacer, compre vasos de colores, di que quieres beber,
01:13:11nos quedamos mal chiquita viendo el atardecer, que se jode el toque que ha quedado y lo vamos a romper, corazón no es el corazón lo que palpita, no se ha muerto, pero si hay viuda en la neverita, va a pasar la noche contigo enterita, pero si tú te quitas, volvemos a Santa Rita, yeah.
01:13:26Y si tú quieres agua dale bebé, mojate y después, si pescamos que la sal no sane.
01:13:45Sana, curita, tengo sal, esto es pa' mojar a las nenas, sana, curita, tengo sal, búscate el mezcal, esto es pa' curar todas las penas.
01:14:15Gracias por ver el video.
01:14:45Gracias por ver el video.
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