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  • 3 months ago

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00:00So when I was married to Lamar and he was in the height of a lot of the toxic things that he was
00:07doing to himself, Lamar would be late. He would be sweating. There was a lot of signs of what he
00:14was doing. So when he showed up late, I'm not saying he was using drugs. I'm just saying if he
00:18was organically late, these things triggered something in me or threw me back to when we
00:26were married. And when he was sweating, yes, Malika's AC broke that day. There were reasons
00:32why these things were happening, but those things really triggered me. So I think I automatically
00:38went into protection mode and I needed to protect myself. And I sort of blacked out and I was an
00:44autopilot. I couldn't have told you verbatim the things that I said after our meeting.
00:52And if you were like, so what happened? I don't think I would have been able to tell you because
00:57I was in my fight or flight mode.
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