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Short filmTranscript
00:00:00For those of you who have had the pleasure of visiting Evergreen Lane, you know what
00:00:11I mean when I say this is the most festive street in America.
00:00:14And for those of you who have never had the chance to visit us, fret not, because you
00:00:19are about to see a street that carries the spirit of the holidays all year round.
00:00:24Normally this cul-de-sac is the center of all neighborhood activity, but today we all
00:00:30had a previous engagement.
00:00:33There has never been a more deserving bride and groom than you and Jared.
00:00:36I love you guys so much.
00:00:38Thank you for being my bridesmaids.
00:00:39I'm so lucky.
00:00:40Don't make me cry before the vows.
00:00:42Not cool, Emily.
00:00:45And before I use this for myself, I hand embroidered it.
00:00:50Something new and something blue, so it counts as two.
00:00:54This is beautiful.
00:00:55I am so honored that you borrowed my old tiara and veil.
00:01:00I wore it when I was Snow Queen at college.
00:01:03I'm the one that's honored.
00:01:05It's gorgeous.
00:01:06You look spectacular.
00:01:11You really do.
00:01:13Can you believe the Johnsons won't be here?
00:01:15Hey now, no need to talk about they who have left the lane.
00:01:18You didn't need to make him a groomsman in absentia.
00:01:21Why do you care that he's an honorary groomsman?
00:01:23You are my best man.
00:01:26That's why you're here with me on the most important day of my life.
00:01:29You, me, and Bob.
00:01:31Hey, we're all out of Vienna sausages.
00:01:34No, no.
00:01:35The charcuterie is for the groom.
00:01:37I was a groom once.
00:01:38It's okay, it's okay.
00:01:38I'm far too nervous to eat.
00:01:40Maybe I've got something that could help.
00:01:44Homemade Bavarian mead made with honey from my very own apiary.
00:01:48The HOA handbook says nothing about beekeeping, Ned.
00:01:51Well, until it's amended, just mind your own bee-ness and let's have a toast.
00:01:56Here's to the next chapter of life, love, and pursuit of the holidays.
00:02:01Cheers.
00:02:02Cheers.
00:02:03Cheers.
00:02:04Sweetheart, it's time.
00:02:08Okay, Mom.
00:02:09Yes, dear.
00:02:10Do not call my Mom, dear.
00:02:12Gentlemen.
00:02:13Let's do this.
00:02:15Yeah.
00:02:38Everybody sit down, please.
00:02:43You look beautiful.
00:02:45Hey.
00:02:46Hey.
00:02:48Dearly beloved, we are gathered today to celebrate the union of these two beautiful souls.
00:02:55Emily, the moment I fell in love with you was captured on a Polaroid picture.
00:03:00We were seven years old on your front porch.
00:03:02And from that day on, I've been looking forward to this day.
00:03:04And as I stand in front of you today, although my knees are shaking a bit like that Polaroid picture,
00:03:10I've watched you develop into this beautiful, smart, kind woman that I could spend the rest of my life with.
00:03:24I promise you I will do my best to paint a perfect picture of love and devotion together.
00:03:34Forever.
00:03:38Jared, I always knew there was something very special about you.
00:03:41And when we reconnected, everyone reminded me of what an amazing architect you are.
00:03:48And they were right.
00:03:52The way you have designed your life with loyalty for the ones you love.
00:03:56And it shows me who you really are at your core.
00:03:59You make me feel safe and supported.
00:04:03And there is no one I would rather make plans to build the rest of my life with than you.
00:04:10Emily Melrose, do you take Jared to be your lawful wedded husband?
00:04:14I do.
00:04:16Jared Farnsworth, do you take Emily to be your lawful wedded wife?
00:04:20Absolutely. Without a doubt.
00:04:23I do.
00:04:24Then, by the power vested in me, I now pronounce you husband and wife.
00:04:29And you may now kiss the bride.
00:04:30So hold on to your heart, I close high, I close high.
00:04:39I love you.
00:04:41This is the first time ever in this room.
00:04:43This is Jared Farnsworth.
00:04:45Each day gets closer.
00:04:49So hold on stronger to me.
00:04:54You may be wondering why we didn't do a Christmas wedding.
00:04:57We considered it, but in memory of Jared's late father, we chose to do it on his parents' anniversary.
00:05:03And even though we had a fun-filled honeymoon planned, we were both excited to get back home
00:05:07and get into the spirit of the upcoming holidays.
00:05:11The only problem was, this year, we had no idea what kind of spirit it would bring.
00:05:16Ghosts and ghouls.
00:05:33Ghosts and ghouls.
00:05:36Ghosts and ghouls.
00:05:38Ghosts and ghouls.
00:05:39Ghosts and ghouls.
00:05:47What in the Samhain?
00:05:50Silver squad to green team, are you seeing what we're seeing?
00:05:54looks like we got a couple bona fide fridophiles
00:06:04gonna move in for a closer look watch my six
00:06:09double double toil and trouble
00:06:20all right so what are we gonna do about this folks should i get the president on the line let him
00:06:26enjoy his honeymoon we'll break it to him when he gets back we get it belinda you want grandchildren
00:06:30but i think he would want to know don't mess this up for me are you excited my lovely by the pricking
00:06:38of my thumb something wicked this way comes i'll take that as a yes
00:06:42you have too many ghosts not enough headstones come on people get it right
00:06:50oh oh you're a squirrel
00:06:54jared you really didn't have to spring for a stretch limo we're just on our way home from
00:06:57the airport oh but i did we were still on our honeymoon it was the best honeymoon ever i
00:07:03enjoyed every second of it with you you know what after two weeks in scandinavia i am actually
00:07:08really excited to get back home i could have used one more weekend i think i preferred
00:07:12i wonder if you'll feel the same way after we celebrate valpergus night this spring i pre-booked
00:07:17the hotel and everything i'm sorry what the biggest swedish springtime festival that there is apparently
00:07:22it's not to be missed honey i love that you're a planner but vacations are kind of something we need
00:07:26to plan together now you're right you're right i just got too excited i'm used to planning things
00:07:32on my own but now we're married we make decisions together yeah because you're my wife my husband
00:07:40i love you
00:07:41oh
00:07:46oh wow i wonder if pamela's remodel is done glad she liked the design oh she was so happy with
00:07:58it you did such a good job i wish i was as fulfilled at my job as you are you're literally
00:08:02the best writer right now copywriter i said what i said i mean it thanks love i'll get back
00:08:08into it i just wish we could stay in fantasy land a little bit longer well then you are in
00:08:12luck because like the medieval knights of the old i shall carry you over the threshold of
00:08:16our new castle really not necessary it's a sign of my love and affection for you a literal
00:08:22symbol that i would drop everything on account of your beck and call
00:08:26jared jared jared jared oh i'm so sorry here we go get here sorry okay are you sure okay i'm
00:08:38fine oh no not again it's time no no no no jared let's bring it down a notch remember the mantra
00:08:43we've been working on not my weeds not my garden emily when you hold the mantle of the president
00:08:49let's see this entire neighborhood is my garden oh if you will
00:08:53you brought the clipboard on the honeymoon
00:08:59you rang
00:09:03uh yes i i did ring uh i wanted to introduce myself and ask you a few questions about your
00:09:11understanding of the hoa guidelines honey i don't think that's an actual person i think that's a
00:09:16recording i think you're probably right
00:09:17sorry seriously did you guys ring hi
00:09:24hi i am jared farnsworth hoa president of this lovely neighborhood this is my first counselor
00:09:31and head of activities committee emily melrose
00:09:34farnsworth emily farnsworth it's my newest title jared and i got married last month
00:09:38congratulations we've heard tale of the presidential power couple
00:09:41i had a premonition we would be graced by your presence won't you come inside that would be amazing
00:09:46it would it would except that my wife and i we just got back from our honeymoon and we're very
00:09:50very very tired that's nothing a little jack-o-lantern java won't fix and marvin makes them extra
00:09:56strong yes i do that sounds amazing i'm sure it is except that we haven't been deloused yet
00:10:01deloused yes but in the meantime per your display as detailed as it is we are going to have to ask
00:10:06you two you know pair it back pair it back the lights and the pumpkins can stay great touch
00:10:12actually but your lawn display has to go back into the crib
00:10:16as it were i don't understand our realtor told us this was the most festive neighborhood in all of the
00:10:26the state of utah and we are yes at christmas we are ever green lane not ever scream lane
00:10:31whatever scream lane i love that we should totally call it that from god yes no don't do that that
00:10:36was just a very clever play on words for me to emphasize my point which is what exactly per hoa
00:10:43guidelines we um it it says that section 12 i'm pretty sure it says you have too much halloween
00:10:52well that's not what albert told us and it was confirmed by game so you've met my parents they
00:10:57were the first to welcome us to the neighborhood so nice of you both to let them stay with you for
00:11:02the rest of hurricane season especially right after the wedding must be scoring some serious
00:11:07son-in-law points fair well i better be you know what why don't you just excuse us we're gonna get
00:11:13settled and then we can discuss this whole in-laws and by-law situations that sound okay fair is foul
00:11:18and foul is fair just let us know will do let's go you're good so great to meet you
00:11:26stay here it's a strange couple indeed
00:11:30i really hope you're not mad at me i'm definitely not mad emily i'm just a little surprised is all
00:11:39why didn't you tell me you invited them so sorry my mom asked in the middle of the wedding craziness
00:11:44and i just forgot i truly am sorry but they're in the guest loft above the garage you're never
00:11:48gonna see them don't apologize i love your parents love hosting your parents it's just
00:11:53you know like you said it's just me and you now so i just want to be on the same page on this stuff
00:11:58that's all absolutely i got your back and i've got yours
00:12:01now let's take care of this decoration situation all right jared what seems to be the problem oh i
00:12:11don't know halbert maybe the fact that we got back from the wedding of our dreams only returned
00:12:14to a nightmare it's just a few lawn decorations that's how it starts and this you know the younger
00:12:20generation they're sneaking out of their bedrooms searching for the great pumpkin let's not get
00:12:24crazy now i'm not it's just i'm hoping we are being sensitive to those who may not feel comfortable
00:12:33celebrating this time of year we have bylaws put in place like this for a reason right but that's not
00:12:38entirely true what do you mean it's not true the motion to de-escalate the other holidays was
00:12:43proposed and hotly debated but in the end was never voted on and therefore never passed
00:12:50what other lies have i been told nobody lied to you jared the council just decided
00:12:56after what happened maybe a vote wasn't necessary everyone agreed to honor the de-escalation of
00:13:04halloween out of respect but technically there's no official bylaw what do you mean after what
00:13:08happened oh honey have you forgotten we did all of this for you for me maybe she blocked it out
00:13:18it was the last big halloween we celebrated on the lane
00:13:21you mean the last year with grandma
00:13:26excuse me i'll be in the basement
00:13:36the ba-
00:13:38hey grab graham i'm sorry i left you down here
00:14:05i just couldn't figure out exactly where to put you
00:14:10your memory lives best in my head anyway
00:14:14i know it's not the best way to deal with things but here we are in a basement full of old memories
00:14:22no one can bother us
00:14:24hey
00:14:25jimmy christmas you scared me
00:14:26i'm sorry i just i know how you feel about basements and uh well you've been down here for
00:14:31wow 27 minutes and counting it's gotta be a record for me honestly it's not that bad
00:14:37what was that
00:14:42bernice
00:14:44yeah i know i still hate it down here
00:14:47you okay
00:14:51yeah i'll be fine
00:14:54i think i've just been so focused on the wedding and our future that
00:15:00i kind of forgot about the past
00:15:03she was a great woman
00:15:06yeah i can still hear her voice
00:15:09remember what she always used to say to us
00:15:12you two belong in a storybook
00:15:15it's halloween sweetie what could you possibly be upset about
00:15:23ashlyn ashworth and her friends just like scarecrows in her yard
00:15:26and they totally jumped out and scared us
00:15:29you got yard yelp did you
00:15:30yep
00:15:31don't let them get to you
00:15:32they were just trying to have fun
00:15:34but i ran so fast
00:15:36i spilled my candy on the way back
00:15:38that's okay i'm leaving
00:15:39i'll share mine
00:15:40jared that won't be necessary
00:15:42i'll take you two out on the golf cart
00:15:45awesome
00:15:45i heard mary louise and bob are giving out full-size candy bars
00:15:50we gotta get there before they run out
00:15:51all in good time my pretties
00:15:54all in good time
00:15:56before we go
00:16:00why don't you tell jared what i always say about halloween
00:16:04never go to ned's house
00:16:05he only gives out freeze-dried elk liver
00:16:08true
00:16:09what else do i say about halloween
00:16:11it started as a day to remember those who passed away
00:16:14even though we get to dress up and get candy from our friends and family
00:16:18we should also remember our friends and family members that aren't with us anymore
00:16:23and not only should we remember them but they should be celebrated
00:16:27but why do we dress up
00:16:29because it's tradition
00:16:30and there's no better way to connect with your friends and neighbors than through age-old traditions
00:16:35now what do you say we get back to my favorite one of all
00:16:39trick-or-treating
00:16:40let's do it
00:16:41that's all right kids
00:16:42my own up
00:16:43happy halloween
00:16:46we got so much candy that year
00:16:48buckets full
00:16:49i had no idea that'd be the last time she took us trick-or-treating
00:16:55she was gone just two weeks later
00:16:58that's when the neighborhood decided to take a step back
00:17:00she was the center of the celebration with her creativity and the costumes and the decorations
00:17:06she always inspired everybody
00:17:07halloween was never the same without her
00:17:09of course i was heartbroken when she passed but i had no idea that's why everyone else pulled back from celebrating
00:17:14and i never asked for that
00:17:16and certainly not something gram gram would have wanted
00:17:19oh you're right
00:17:19i mean she said it herself
00:17:21halloween is for remembering your loved ones and having a whole lot of fun
00:17:26it's time we bring halloween back
00:17:28evergreen style
00:17:29are you sure about this
00:17:30no i'm not sure about this i'm actually scared hot to death about this
00:17:34you know how i am
00:17:35i don't like scary movies
00:17:35i don't even like movies that people say aren't scary but definitely are
00:17:38tell me about it
00:17:38i'm trying to get you to finish never ending story for forever
00:17:41yeah that's never gonna happen because i hate quicksand as much as i hate scary basements
00:17:44noted but it's time for you to wake up and face the creepy organ music
00:17:49for the neighborhood
00:17:51and for grandma
00:17:52and for you
00:17:54now let's get you out of here
00:17:58first
00:17:58no kissing in the creepy basement
00:18:00fair enough
00:18:01speed it up buttercup we got work to do
00:18:06looking good grandma
00:18:09figure i can call you that
00:18:11i'll let them officially in the family
00:18:14don't worry
00:18:16we're gonna make you proud
00:18:18come up to the attic
00:18:20you have to see this
00:18:22em do you just want to bring them down here
00:18:24i can't just please just come up
00:18:36look what i found
00:18:50portal to pan's labyrinth
00:18:51my grandma's witch hat
00:18:59oh there's so much great stuff up here
00:19:02i can see why you spent so much time here
00:19:04wait you've never been to my attic
00:19:06no i was never allowed apparently i'm still trespassing
00:19:09no boys allowed even javid farnsworth
00:19:13spelling was atrocious in your defense that is the way i used to pronounce it
00:19:17well jared farnsworth is very much allowed up here
00:19:20he's not a boy he's a man my man
00:19:25all right we have to brainstorm how we are going to make this the best halloween in years
00:19:28we could start by selling tickets to this creepy attic
00:19:31come on it's not that creepy
00:19:34i will not be ashamed by my choice in music
00:19:36and how do you explain the creepy typewriter from the shiny
00:19:39that was my grandma's she taught me to type on that one
00:19:42yeah and that was the desk where i would
00:19:44sit and write all my stories
00:19:46you know maybe this is a message from her to get you to start writing again
00:19:49i wish she'd sent that message to my former agent or publisher or two
00:19:53i spent most of my twenties trying to make a career out of writing stories but
00:19:58it just wasn't meant to be
00:20:00maybe it's best this chapter of my life is left up here just a beautiful childhood memory
00:20:05this was your dream yeah but when your dream is just
00:20:09collecting dust in a box it's time to pack it up and move on
00:20:15all right we gotta get busy we have an hoa meeting to plan we have some serious bylaws to
00:20:20propose i am going to mobilize the ladies of the activities committee and if you could
00:20:24coordinate with ned about a venue on it thank you
00:20:38oh jared
00:20:39thanks for the inspiration graham we'll make you proud
00:20:53all right evergreen ladies this may come as a very big surprise but in honor of my sweet grandma
00:20:58melrose i want to help bring back halloween in a big way so let's get a good old-fashioned
00:21:03brainstorm going on the thread traditions old and new all ideas welcome fire them off
00:21:09and his gram gram would say mount up
00:21:14come on honey let's go ned's hosting and you know he needs a good 36-hour advance notice to demust the
00:21:19place coming sweetheart
00:21:25i thought we agreed after the last time that we weren't going to hold the hoa meetings at ned's
00:21:28anymore i mean he served expired military rations i think we should have a potluck joe
00:21:34well then we're gonna need a lot of luck because susie's funeral potatoes almost killed me
00:21:38i'm impressed you really upped your game here what is the queen coming nothing says royalty like
00:21:43charcuterie i've got the donuts hips on the creepy cruller ned don't push me on the pastries
00:21:50you can't have a creepy cruller because they don't exist wait there are only crullers no donuts
00:21:57i know how popular they are so i made them all crullers i'm sorry what did you say crullers i i said
00:22:03crullers that's what i thought thank you belinda at least you won't embarrass yourself leg wrestling
00:22:08bob for one of them i would have won if he let me wear my orthotic sneakers it was barefoot or bust in
00:22:14my day that's because they hadn't invented shoes yet so what's the tea fam are the new neighbors going to
00:22:22show up today if they do i'm sure it'll be in a puff of smoke or on broom back i swear those two are
00:22:28witches have you ever heard that luna speak every word she says sounds like she's casting a spell so
00:22:34spooky yeah they've been invited as per jared and the prima conventus clause of 94. i've heard that
00:22:41marvin is a mortgage banker by day and moonlights as an undertaker just for kicks i don't know what they
00:22:48call them in the 19th century but today we call them morticians and where did you hear that from
00:22:54anyway i'll give you a hint he wears a singlet for underwear and he believes that pro wrestling is real
00:23:02if a masked man gave you the tombstone pile driver at a waffle house outside of galveston i assure you
00:23:08you would know just how real it is i can see that your ongoing litigation with the undertaker hasn't
00:23:14been resolved that doesn't mean that marvin works in a mortuary for fun think about it the initials
00:23:20embalmer embalmer what kind of a cruel joke were his parents playing worst part is i'm embalmer the
00:23:29fifth so that's five generations of being bullied in middle school but no i am not a mortician for
00:23:34fun or professionally just want to clear that up from the jump sorry didn't mean to be rude not
00:23:39offended in the least round about the cauldron go in the poison entrails throw no the poison
00:23:47and while we're at it my wife is not a witch exactly what a witch would say dibs on the ruby
00:23:53slippers round about the cauldron go in the poison entrails throw yes oh i'm sorry you guys must think i'm
00:24:04crazy i just got cast in mcbeth at the castle theater oh she's gonna be witch number one yeah
00:24:09it's sort of a dream role for me your dream role is witch number one yeah because witch number two
00:24:14was already cast marvin and i are english professors at uvu and total shakespeare buffs what light through
00:24:21yonder window breaks tis our new neighbors and halloween is their son i see we have a fellow shakespearean
00:24:28among us just got my bard card renewed a fortnight ago here we go and your lawn display is amazing bt
00:24:37dubs an homage to the great tragedies shakespeare was the father of the modern horror genre thou speaketh
00:24:43truth i hate to break up this fun little drama camp we've got going on here but this
00:24:52is evergreen lane not the globe theater and our hoa president would never allow this level of theatrics
00:25:04ladies and gentlemen of the hoa for the first time ever we present
00:25:08is
00:25:21i got the crayoners it's pronounced cruller
00:25:29ladies and gentlemen i do apologize for this late start i was unaware the potency of indoor smoke bombs you
00:25:35could have just borrowed my bulgarian fog condenser but whatever noted thank you i'm sure you're all
00:25:42wondering why we called this last minute meeting no not really emily emailed us all an itinerary last
00:25:48night great well i'm sure you're all wondering why the change of heart then no emily sent us a very
00:25:53inspirational voice memo explaining everything did she now that's great well i guess i'm not sure what
00:26:00i'm doing here other than just looking pretty fly in my vintage j-press suit you look great babe do you
00:26:04want me to take this please please all right everyone per addendum b sub paragraph c of the hoa
00:26:11handbook the head of the activities committee has the right and obligation to propose and uphold
00:26:17traditions new and old i love it when you speak by law i learn from the best wow you two really took
00:26:23that to become one homily to heart oh thank you so much okay please stop so i took the committee's
00:26:29feedback i ran it by mr president here and we have decided to turn evergreen lane into
00:26:38ever scream lane we have taken the traditions of yesteryear combined with the zeitgeist of current day
00:26:47to bring this spooky season to life in a new and thrilling way inspired by the boldness of the
00:26:54balmers each household will be required to create a halloween lawn display to bring the spirit of this
00:27:00holiday to life you have one week to get your displays together or there will be consequences
00:27:07i mean it'll be like you know a citation or community service hours but do not tempt me
00:27:12for i have fresh citation pads there will be daily activities leading up to halloween such as a pumpkin
00:27:18painting contest painting why don't we just carve those puppies because ned pumpkin guts are gross
00:27:24they're stringy they're slimy no but it's very visceral for me okay please ned we don't have time
00:27:30for your sensory obsession touch your corduroys thank you pamela you're gonna be thrilled to know that
00:27:35there will be a beastly bake-off yes oh my gosh i could be ghoulia child with spooky sweaters and just
00:27:45how we do a toy drive at christmas we will be doing a charity food drive but to top it all off
00:27:53sorry okay jared really wanted to do this part so good thank you so much honey and to top it all off
00:27:58on all hallows eve october 31st halloween after the tricks have been played after the treats have been
00:28:05treated we will have a cul-de-sac carnival costume competition to bring that creativity to life are there
00:28:15any rules to who we can or cannot impersonate no more foreign dignitaries we do not need the fbi
00:28:21here again yes ned please keep all costumes within the parameters of hoa guidelines and in accordance
00:28:26with state and federal laws tricky but not impossible in light of all this we have something
00:28:31we'd like to propose that is if we can't invoke addendum three of the party protocol well invoke away
00:28:36please i know you already have the food drive planned but every year we do a big spooky alley in
00:28:42our front yard we go all out to raise money for the children's hospital as a young girl i was treated
00:28:48there and they saved my life so we try to do everything we can to give back that's amazing i mean
00:28:54dealt with the charity i i love it i really wait wait wait wait wait wait how spooky are we talking
00:29:01say like a five or a six on the nosferatu meter but we hit a 7.5 once no no seven five but that was
00:29:09close to y2k's all sorts of things were happening that won't happen again i'm not opposed to it as
00:29:20long as we remember this is for the kids so we have to keep the scare factor to a five or below
00:29:24yeah of course should we just take a vote yeah i think we have to i mean that's part of the
00:29:29and that settles it i'll pass out some ballots and we can decide if this neighborhood is ready to come
00:29:34together to face our biggest fears this halloween i've already faced my greatest fear a hot yoga
00:29:40class taught by ned it's free on thursdays oh it might be free but you will pay dearly trust me
00:29:47now take me off your mail chimp
00:29:55halloween is back baby okay pumpkin spiced your latte i'm just so excited the vote was unanimous everyone
00:30:03love my halloween plans and then our new neighbors had this amazing idea to do this outdoor spooky
00:30:07alley and it's gonna raise money for the children's hospital first lady of ever scream lane you're
00:30:11really taking charge carving up the hoa handbook how's jared doing with all this at first it was
00:30:17really hard for him to transition his mind to a new holiday kind of like he's cheating on christmas
00:30:21right but now that he's in it he's doubling down it's like kevin in k-pop this is new i played one
00:30:26song for him one time he totally made fun of me the next day it was all he was listening to
00:30:31he's basically made it his whole personality same thing with jared he's been driving all the way to
00:30:34provo to go to this tailor-made costume store almost every day you are in it we are but it
00:30:40is just a lot to balance with work i feel like i'm kind of just going through the motions i mean
00:30:44i'm doing a good job but it's just it's not fulfilling welcome to most of america i think it's
00:30:49just you know the wedding and the honeymoon it was so perfect i just want to relive it well the honeymoon
00:30:53phase is great but the real joy of marriage is the journey that lies ahead i love that speaking of
00:31:01i have to get that little journey to piano lessons hey honey you want to wrap up that book you're
00:31:05reading we got to get going all done i finished the whole series actually do you have any more oh
00:31:11i didn't even realize jared had brought that box down from the attic no i only wrote the seven seven
00:31:17how come i only knew about one after my agent didn't get any bites on the first one she
00:31:21dropped me like a t-swift album didn't really make sense to continue i really like the different
00:31:26aliens zolt is so funny really what was your favorite part probably when the hover wagon was
00:31:31broken and zolt was the only one who could fix it because of the combo wrench his dad gave him
00:31:36wow he really did read it yep let me know if you write any more thanks nicole i will
00:31:52oh cute costume you look adorable
00:32:04you shall not pass
00:32:09lie you fools
00:32:10boo what are you what are you doing here i've been trying to ask you the same question but someone
00:32:16i know doesn't answer their phone for the last two hours i'm sorry the store's a bit of a dead
00:32:19zone didn't you see the sign jared that says undead zone it's just a clever sign to sell zombie
00:32:26paraphernalia i love this store clearly you've been coming here every day since we jumped on this
00:32:31haunted hayride i just want to feel inspired you know we have a we have a costume contest coming up no
00:32:35no no we're doing fan of the opera we're singing the duet yeah um i wanted to talk to you about
00:32:40that jared you know i don't do harmony what if i did the contest alone oh okay is that fine yeah i mean
00:32:53i i don't know what to say but honest reaction go it's fine of course it's fine yeah we have been
00:33:00doing a lot of stuff together lately and maybe maybe we should do some things on our own okay so
00:33:06you're not annoyed i'm only annoyed that now i have to figure out what i'm doing whatever it is i'm
00:33:10sure it's going to be epic speaking of epic we should discuss lawn display asap now what are you
00:33:16thinking evil battling robots zombie apocalypse no no this is what i wanted to tell you i think i have
00:33:23found the perfect thing i'm confused i thought we were working on the lawn display look around
00:33:32what does this remind you of mainly the fact that i missed lunch and i'm starving and i want to eat
00:33:36the entire store no think about it last halloween with grandma hansen gretel the witch's gingerbread
00:33:43house what's more halloween than grim's fairy tale and it's the perfect way to honor grandma i'm gonna
00:33:48get to work on the blueprints immediately we don't have time for blueprints once we build the witch's
00:33:52house would be the perfect hiding spot for yard yelping jared yes no i didn't think you were into
00:33:57yard yelping i'm not i'm not but if i was i would be like the daniel day lewis of it you know i hate
00:34:07when people do that ashley nashford still haunts my dreams 20 years later i could see her in that
00:34:14scarecrow makeup she's lurking about oh it's horrible horrible well then why would you vote to protect
00:34:20yard yelping on new hoa protocol because like it or not it is a tradition and traditions are important
00:34:26but that's why i added the regulation to reduce the scare factor that way every screen lane is a
00:34:30halloween destination for all young and old so impressive i just really want this to be next
00:34:35level and it's going to be everyone can see it thanks you know though speaking of ashlyn doesn't
00:34:42she host wake up utah on channel six yes her mom and mine stayed friends after they moved
00:34:47she mentions it every time she's on tv do you think she could put me in contact with
00:34:52her maybe they could do a story about what we're up to this year sure but aren't you guys like
00:34:57frenemies i mean we were but maybe it was a long time ago and if it could help bring people to the
00:35:03carnival that would be great i mean our neighborhood isn't exactly known as a halloween destination so
00:35:08if we want to raise some serious money for children's hospital i do think it's worth a try i like where
00:35:12your head's at cheers where's your stomach at because i'm starving excuse me can we get a dozen
00:35:17patries to go and uh one is german chocolate cookies and uh oh threw in two honey boys excuse me
00:35:23could i see this please orange oh they clear two glares
00:35:34careful bob i don't want to fall down he's a werewolf why would he be wearing a ball gown let's
00:35:39judge this guy up careful that could be flammable trust me i know
00:35:46jared slow down looking good belinda thanks boo did you just call ned your boo no i i was just
00:35:55trying to scare him boo did i scare you right out of my socks girl hey jared help me put the nails in my
00:36:03coffin
00:36:14smile you two oh what a couple of handsomes you are
00:36:20oh my goodness oh oh you need some ice on this jared a little help yeah i got you what do you clowns
00:36:28think you're doing oh thank you jared it has been a real circus around here with these guys
00:36:35i swear one of them is possessed you know clowns freak a lot of people out but not me i actually
00:36:41i kind of like them well you are braver than i am you know i'm going to try to get these guys set
00:36:45up over there i mean you've been working out could you get that big clown stood up of course anything of
00:36:51course pamela sure oh you just got yard yelped hard you did jared you got me helen you got me good
00:37:04i thought you said clowns didn't scare you hope we didn't scare you too bad don't you ever apologize
00:37:10for a well executed prank jared is a big boy he can handle it that's right oh look none of melinda
00:37:17are trying to prank you too are you seeing what i'm seeing oh my god jared jared are you okay
00:37:27what's happening to him mom i don't know sweetie just go inside yes dear whatever looking good
00:37:34belinda thanks boo oh i'm sorry oh here oh is that better yeah that's better jared are you okay
00:37:48i've seen that people jared don't do anything crazy
00:38:01emily emily emily where are you i'm in the kitchen oh no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no
00:38:11is everything okay no it's not okay we are in fact in a worst case scenario scenario did you get
00:38:16rejected from the santa academy what did you hear something no it's worse than that how is that even
00:38:20possible it's ned did he steal your devil sticks what no where are those by the way it's so odd
00:38:25maybe they'll show up so bad i don't even want to say it out loud okay is he going through like
00:38:28a flat earth phase again it's worse than that okay you're killing me small spit it out ned is dating my
00:38:35mom oh no
00:38:42i don't care what he says i refuse to call him dad you might be getting ahead of yourself here you don't
00:38:47know how serious it is yet whatever it was it definitely was not in the friend zone do they
00:38:51know that you saw them flirting no i'll never say a word because i want it erased from my memory every
00:38:56time i close my eyes i can just see the way they were looking at each other just focused and intense
00:39:02like there was no one else in the cul-de-sac actually sounds kind of sweet the man pours
00:39:06pickle brine in the shredded wheat there's nothing sweet about him
00:39:12i have to tell pamela not to tell anyone she saw two is that bad that's not good is she gonna tell
00:39:16everyone i mean that tea's probably too hot for her not to spill we have to stop this i get that you're
00:39:20upset but you got to remember they're adults and ned is ned and maybe that's what your mom wants
00:39:24or maybe she's onto a spell didn't you say that he studied hypnosis in uh in vienna jared you have to talk to
00:39:30her ask her how she's feeling she's obviously worried and that's why she's hiding it from you
00:39:35so tell her it's safe for her to talk to you about it at this point i don't know if it is great okay
00:39:41why don't you just take a breath and go work on the gingerbread house i'm sure there's some gumdrops
00:39:44that need to be gummed or some candy that needs to be caned what there's no candy canes at halloween
00:39:49jared just eat your pie for you i will needs more sprinkles that looks good
00:39:55when did you do this i've been wrapped up with all this net knot since i've even noticed this
00:40:00so what are you doing over here jess was over here with nicole the other day and she read all of
00:40:05those books that you had brought down from the attic and she really loved them and it just kind of
00:40:09inspired me to pick it up again you totally should it's very casual just the neighborhood had inspired
00:40:13an idea and it just you know just started sketching some things out sketch away my love looks great
00:40:19you're so talented thank you i love you oh oh my goodness ashlyn texting me back oh nice what'd she
00:40:26say the channel 6 news is coming to ever scream lane what i'm gonna text the girls
00:40:42what happened there graham how'd you go all skiwampus on me again
00:40:49everything's looking really good around here and
00:40:59i'm writing again i mean i'm not getting too excited just because of what happened last time but
00:41:04i am having so much fun and that's enough for me right now anyway it's turning into the picture
00:41:11perfect holiday and it just feels like everything's come full circle
00:41:19i only wish you were here to see it
00:41:23love you good night
00:41:32i'm ashlyn ashworth and welcome to wake up utah we are here on evergreen lane or should i say
00:41:38ever scream lane a neighborhood that is usually known for christmas has traded its cheer for fear
00:41:45this spooky season when we come back we will join them as they kick off the much anticipated neighborhood
00:41:51pumpkin painting contest a tradition that has been squashed for over 25 years
00:41:58i nailed that right hey is it a bad time no not at all we're on commercial it is great to see you emily
00:42:04good to see you too thank you so much for coming oh are you serious i had to see this for myself
00:42:08i still can't believe that you're behind all of this we used to live here you know how festive we get
00:42:12for christmas sure but ever since you got so scared by my scarecrow prank this entire neighborhood
00:42:18turned into a ghost town on halloween remember oh that is good hey write that down oh i remember
00:42:24and so does my therapist trust me come on it wasn't that bad i mean your friend jeremy was there and
00:42:29he didn't seem too scared jared who me jared farnsworth oh i'm so sorry i meet a lot of people
00:42:36no no it's okay i was with her the night that you yard yelled this dress is handsome you know we were
00:42:42in miss thornock's homeroom together super skinny legs always wanted to play the mash game with us
00:42:46super nerdy that's fun to hear oh yeah big dorky glasses and he would always rig the mash game to
00:42:51end up with you i was like hello well i guess he got his wish because we got married last month
00:42:58that's amazing seriously congrats you two thank you and thank you so much for doing this segment
00:43:03it's really exciting as hoa president we really appreciate the exposure to show how far we've
00:43:09come since we celebrated halloween on this level of course do you want me to interview you two no yes
00:43:15i i just was thinking we should keep it about the neighbor you know totally okay well we're about
00:43:19to be back so i can catch up with you guys later yeah girl do your thing okay uh ty let's move let's go
00:43:26get more coverage do your thing girl what's that i don't know i mean i get around her and i turn into
00:43:31plastic that is the least of my concerns right now i mean look that is at the table with my mom
00:43:35they're on the team relax relax relax it's ned and how do you feel about the halloween traditions
00:43:41coming back to life it's simply gorgeous did you see what i did there gourd gorgeous that is a good
00:43:48one did you just come up with that that's been ripening on the vine for years don't make me put you
00:43:54done for now bob when you're known for only christmas you don't have the opportunity to
00:43:58show your range most people know that i have a doctorate in arts and crafts but what they don't
00:44:04know is that i did a study abroad in the atacama region of northern chile which is the pumpkin
00:44:10capital of south america basically i have forgotten more about these babies than most people will learn
00:44:16in a lifetime i'm about to ph destroy the competition if you know what i mean do you know what i mean
00:44:23i think i do how would you describe your neighbors intense in a good way like benedict from much ado
00:44:29about nothing oh i'd say a little more like catherine from taming of the trail she's more like rosalyn
00:44:33well no i mean i know you love rosalyn might as well talk about tartuffe i'm excited to use the
00:44:37pointillism technique my mom taught me i think it really captures the essence of the holiday without
00:44:42being too on the nose i've gone for more of a cubist approach using shapes to really represent the
00:44:47surreal nature of what halloween represents look at those couple goals adorable i can't even enjoy this right
00:44:52i'm far too upset honey i want you to try to stay calm look at the wise look at the wise that's
00:44:58something you only say in your extreme dress deep breaths ty for this one i'd love to get a nice in
00:45:03camera zoom as you can see not everyone dressed up for the painting contest i guess some of us just care
00:45:11more now ty go wide go wide
00:45:15how are you going to get a nice in your life
00:45:19hanged with us
00:45:22fun fact the first jack-o-lanterns were made from turnips or large potatoes it stemmed from the celtic
00:45:29samhain festival in ireland which some people pronounce salween yeah they were believed to ward off evil
00:45:36spirits lurking about but today there's a much more jocular meaning to it and dare i say
00:45:43romantic oh romantic in what way take our pumpkins for example oh romeo and juliet correct we are
00:45:52nearing noontide so the lighting is not correct for this but could you imagine what this street
00:46:00would look like at night and with these pumpkins carved and lit as they should have been done
00:46:06come even tide these star-crossed lovers will surely light up the autumnal sky
00:46:15oh dear edgar james broadhead
00:46:19step away from my mama
00:46:23i most certainly will not jared sweetie you know what let's just take a minute and talk about this
00:46:30that's a great idea belinda you know why don't we turn off the cameras for a second and we can
00:46:33discuss how long has this been going on well i can't speak for the lady but as for me two christmases
00:46:39ago the night you first took the throne in santa's village betrayed and in my own kingdom
00:46:47i will not allow you to defame the farnsworth name with your unwelcomed advances they are more than
00:46:52welcome thank you very much is that true truer than true north more absolute than absolute zero
00:47:08there you have it folks true love right here on live tv
00:47:12and just like that hoa president jared barnsworth smashes a jack-o-lantern of love begging the
00:47:29question should this neighborhood actually be called ever meanling that's enough ashland back to you ted
00:47:39back to you ted
00:47:42as a childhood resident of the lane i know from experience how firm of a grip the homeowners
00:47:48association has on its residents the intensity is simply too much for some including my parents
00:47:55when asked hoa president jared barnsworth refused to make a statement but his actions spoke much more
00:48:01than words
00:48:06many utahans would dream of living on evergreen lane but today felt more like a nightmare on elm
00:48:12street oh come on that's just yellow journalism with a reputation like that i have a feeling the
00:48:16surrounding communities will be frightened away from the rest of the activities this halloween turn
00:48:22it off i'm ashlyn ashworth and this is thank you for letting us use your house as a neutral holding
00:48:28zone while the deliberation occurs so sorry you had to see that i thought it was kind of exciting
00:48:32actually ned broadhead is dating my mother do you understand the implications behind that type of
00:48:38betrayal and you expect me to be concerned with anything else right now i mean i don't know left
00:48:42from right up from down i don't know diagonals right now i mean the man who lived next door to
00:48:46me my best man and the woman that gave birth to me she gave birth to me and i don't know what's
00:48:51happening right now i'm so confused let's just put a hold on the existential crisis until we hear
00:48:57what it is you have to do to make this right and i just hope they don't strip you of your
00:49:00presidential powers they can do that it's in the hands of the triumvirate of truth is that from star
00:49:05wars oh don't let the name fool you it's just mary louise pam and bob they meet at swigalicious and
00:49:09sugar house don't belittle the system these are time proven protocols emergency measures to bring
00:49:15balance to the bylaws star wars who can forget the great hayfield mcavoy debate of 91 when a power grid
00:49:21dispute almost cancelled christmas but lo two humble hoa members stepped into the breach and created the
00:49:29magna carta of merriment are you saying all this because you and i invented it can't i just be
00:49:34proud of our work yes but you don't make us sound humble humble schmumble that's not a nice accusation
00:49:39can we please make a good impression on the new neighbors honey do you think you'll ever forgive me
00:49:45it's not my forgiveness you need right now
00:49:59the triumvirate of truth has reached a decision do what must be done
00:50:12jared farnsworth you have been charged with destruction of personal property
00:50:16and projecting a pumpkin in a pedestrian perimeter not only did this impact the cleanliness of our
00:50:21curbs but it brought negative news coverage to the neighborhood which in turn plummeted the projected
00:50:26property values by approximately three percent hold my soda we know ned to be neurotic and now is known
00:50:35to be necking with your next of kin however we have reviewed the reasoning for your revolt and although
00:50:42we find the target of your treason to be tyrannical it cannot be tolerated in order to be forgiven you must
00:50:50fulfill the following i don't read kirstie very well i'm sorry bob i don't know hieroglyphics
00:50:59i'll paraphrase your powers will be temporarily suspended and given to emily until you make things
00:51:06right emotions are running really high right now and we think you need to sit down with ned and talk
00:51:12it over man to man you ruined it bob you took away all of my alliteration and flair i got you girl
00:51:17basically you better buy the old buck a beer i accept the triumvirate's decision
00:51:26i'm sorry i hold on look i i'm all for you making good with ned i mean you can go out on your mandate
00:51:31you can bro it up all you want but as your interim president i have a mandate of my own anything
00:51:38before you go out with your bro i think belinda deserves a one-on-one conversation of her own
00:51:43don't you i concur madam president thank you i'm so embarrassed we had so much soda i i can't believe
00:51:51that we never thought of her i blame the firm psychological grip of the patriarchy my bad it's
00:51:56okay i've got my traveling quill all right i'll just add this to the bottom of the parchment okay ben
00:52:03do not tell book club about this yum
00:52:22pink meringue oh yes thank you you're delicious you know you didn't have to spring for the queen victoria
00:52:29package i i know i've been i wanted to i know you've always wanted to have tea with a daughter
00:52:36but you know there are no rules about having it with a son i appreciate it but it's me we we can just
00:52:43talk okay then i will start by apologizing emily reminded me that we're all adults here and
00:52:53i sure wasn't acting like one neither did i i could have told you i should have told you when i
00:53:02first started catching feelings but it took me a while to realize what was happening
00:53:09so are are you in that like
00:53:11i don't i don't know how to define it exactly according to mary louise the kids would say we're
00:53:22talking talking what does that mean first of all how does an 80 year old woman know what the lingo is
00:53:33mom the real question is are are you happy i find myself smiling every day
00:53:39that ned is a real rizzler rizzler love that for you i think your father's been gone for so long that i
00:53:49kind of forgot what it felt like to be seen in that way and i never expected to feel that way about ned
00:53:56but something about him has changed and i love the way his eyes light up when he sees me or when he
00:54:03listens to me talk and i know he's one tall glass of some self-distilled spirit but he gets me and
00:54:12oh when he kisses me oh you can stop there i get the picture
00:54:17oh boy i think it just caught me by surprise you know i ned and i haven't always gotten along and
00:54:24he's the strangest man i've ever met but you know i love the guy i know you do and honestly it's still
00:54:34early with us i don't know what's gonna happen but it means so much to me to know that i have your
00:54:40support absolutely i love you son i love you too but if you call ned the rizzler ever again
00:54:49i've changed my mind
00:54:50so when did you first know uh christmas eve uh the year emily came back your mother joined me
00:55:03outside for a mug of hot bourbon cider it was so dark i could just see the moon on her hair
00:55:11and we started talking about our favorite stars you know i could not narrow it down to one star
00:55:19but i do have a favorite nebula of course because everyone knows that so i was born
00:55:26may 1st yes which makes me a please land your plane a taurus taurus
00:55:34which means my favorite is going to be the crab nebula otherwise known as ngc 1952
00:55:41sure yeah every everyone knows that yes but what i didn't know was your mother's favorite star is
00:55:48australia star you didn't know that at all i literally named the only star i could think of
00:55:54it's okay not all of us are astrophiles but those of us who are know that it is located in the
00:56:01constellation of taurus and then your mother tells me that australia is really a very famous greek nymph
00:56:10how about i stop you right there uh it's gonna be enough mythology for one evening no really you
00:56:14should google the story and read it later it's a scorcher i promise you i will not okay but
00:56:21do you want to ask you a favor yes sir first never use nymph and my mother in the same sentence ever
00:56:29again that's a big ask i'm asking i'm gonna try try really really hard yes sir also
00:56:35please treat her well and please be honest with her i swear on the stars and you watch out for
00:56:47yourself too broadhead you hear me okay she breaks your heart don't come crying to me the game of love
00:56:52is high risk high reward i know what i'm playing i swear they're risking it all
00:57:00yeah do you want to play some pool i'll play billiards you can call whatever you want you're going down bro
00:57:12hell yeah sure
00:57:20hey babe what are you setting up i had an idea and it just keeps flowing i couldn't sleep how'd it go with
00:57:26ned and belinda
00:57:38wow that good huh not my weeds not my cart well said
00:57:44i'm about to head to bed all right should i wait up for you no i'm almost done here i was hoping
00:57:53maybe we could snuggle and watch a movie i think i'll make that happen
00:57:57do not drop me please why would i drop you
00:58:05so by watch a movie do you mean start a movie and then
00:58:09in 15 minutes you'll be asleep in my arm yeah but first we could flirt a little you know
00:58:14laugh and cuddle while we try to find something to watch that actually sounds amazing
00:58:21it's my favorite thing in the whole world
00:58:25you know the more i think about the ashland situation i
00:58:29the more i feel like maybe i should reach out and just try and clear the air
00:58:32it was me who embarrassed myself on regional tv no honey i'm not talking about pumpkin gate
00:58:41something she said on the broadcast
00:58:45like maybe her family felt like they were pushed out of the neighborhood
00:58:50i mean i know i can't change anything but i i just would really love to extend a peace offering you
00:58:56know i mean we're adults we shouldn't be shouldn't have this like weirdness from our childhood between us
00:59:05well that's the way you feel i think you should definitely reach out
00:59:09thanks honey
00:59:11isn't it so nice to have someone you can say anything to at any time
00:59:17that is the best definition of marriage i've ever heard
00:59:32hey thanks so much for agreeing to meet me oh of course i'm sorry i don't have more time i have
00:59:36just been so busy with the tapings and keeping up with my followers i've recorded seven cameos this week
00:59:41oh my goodness i'm gonna make it quick i um don't worry about michaela she has heard it all
00:59:47she is a bolt i just wanted to apologize for when we were younger i was the one that scared you
00:59:54remember i know but what i really mean is after that i know the neighbors went into overdrive trying
00:59:59to protect me after my grandmother passed and after the whole scarecrow thing and i just really
01:00:03hope that's not the reason your family decided to move away and after you moved i i thought you were
01:00:09angry at me i really did i thought you were mad and i should have talked to you about it right then
01:00:12and there and instead i put up this wall and it wasn't because i didn't like you it was actually
01:00:17quite the opposite come on emily you nicknamed me schlin shady and that was totally unfair i mean how
01:00:22were you supposed to know that i was going to ask buzz okey to sadie's everyone wanted to ask buzz ah
01:00:26blue-eyed buzz the truth is you were so cool and popular and and i just loved what you did with
01:00:31the school announcements you never told me that well i should have they were clever and funny and
01:00:35everyone loved them and i mean look look where you are now secretly i kind of always wanted
01:00:39to volunteer to write the copy for the teleprompter why didn't you say anything i just never had the
01:00:43courage and i was embarrassed about how things ended between us when you moved i just want to say
01:00:50i'm sorry that i let my own insecurities come between what could have been a really cool friendship
01:00:55we need ashlyn and studio c asap oh i'm so sorry i have to run it's okay talk later yeah of course go
01:01:02go go go thank you oh uh here's a headshot for free oh thank you i'll see you soon
01:01:11that went well i can't believe you confronted the great and powerful ashlyn been bugging me for years
01:01:17it felt so good to get it off my chest i mean she didn't give me much of a reaction but that's okay
01:01:21it was worth it i gotta say i'm proud of you on so many levels oh thank you also i think you're really
01:01:26on to something this year those spider doodles look amazing they taste great too i had three of
01:01:31them when mom wasn't looking Nicole Marie you're gonna make yourself sick come on it's halloween isn't
01:01:35that the point well fine at least give me a bite then mm those are amazing thank you i'm so glad
01:01:43let's save some room for pamela's because you know she is a shoe-in to win the contest no secret there
01:01:48i don't know i'm pretty much of a cookie expert at this point i think you have a chance
01:01:52thanks i mean we'll see i just do feel like the creative juices have been flowing you know since
01:01:58i started writing again i don't know maybe some of that energy has been absorbed into the baking as
01:02:02well i was gonna say there's something different about you i thought it was the honeymoon globe but
01:02:06got a little spark in you i didn't realize how much i miss writing you know like i've forgotten
01:02:11about the joy it brings me i think i thought copywriting was enough but maybe it's not well now you
01:02:16know at least you're back to doing something you love yeah exactly and even if it doesn't turn into
01:02:20something i do for money at least i know it's important to me it's exactly how i feel about
01:02:23the real housewives of salt lake city oh i wish they'd bring monica back right she's the best part
01:02:28i was more intrigued by jen's storyline they said i was a good mom not a perfect mom i hope it's okay
01:02:34that we're a little late i'll get set up thanks oh thank you so much for hosting belinda was a little
01:02:40preoccupied this week if you know what i mean are you kidding this is our idea of a housewarming party
01:02:44more like heartwarming seriously we have lived in a lot of places and never really felt like we fit
01:02:51in till now oh well i think if we looked into the cauldron we would see a lifetime of friendship ahead
01:02:57for us look at our little angel all caught up in festive spirit true i've never seen her so happy but
01:03:07our angel still can't compete with our devil food albert you little demon you come on come on just
01:03:14let me have just a little taste bob not yeti oh i have never been so in love well if you're so in
01:03:22love go get me a drink i can't believe you would take palesthesia over echolocation i mean if you lost
01:03:29your prefrontal cortex see there you go again trying to confuse me with your technical jargon i'm just
01:03:33saying money aside i would rather be peter parker than bruce wayne you are so wrong that fog oh luna
01:03:41wow the detail of your piping is amazing i applaud your efforts i i really do and this is your first
01:03:52cookie competition is it yep and i guess we'll have to see if a win is to be or not to be oh never heard
01:03:59that one before either way we're really hoping we can at least turn a few heads oh well how very
01:04:04optimistic of you but alas poor yorick once the judges take a bite of my chocolate chip chupacabras
01:04:13you're going to be heading home with a participation ribbon pinned on your festive little sweater
01:04:18and that is what we call pre-game intimidation helen take notes shoot they're pretty good okay
01:04:31are we ready
01:04:35welcome to the first beastly bake-off in more than 20 years we had a wickedly hard time judging the
01:04:43entries this year and uh i'm a little scared to announce the winner you should be scared lover girl
01:04:49because if i smell any netty boy nepotism i will go nuclear i can assure you that outside of this year's
01:04:56amazing entries there has been no home cooking in the selection process unlike christmas rules there is
01:05:03only one winner today no second or third place that's right only room for one creature in this cavern
01:05:09baby okay here we go and the winner is
01:05:17for her cinnamon spider doodles
01:05:26there's no such thing as cruellers
01:05:29pamela no no pamela pamela pamela darling pamela it's me it's mary louise
01:05:36oh mary louise it's you
01:05:42bob it's you too oh you guys i just i just had the most horrible dream
01:05:48oh there were cookies and and a witch and and and you were there and and belinda you were there
01:05:56oh and jared you were there too and and still were you
01:06:04we've already performed the awards audit i could confidently confirm that there was
01:06:09no tomfoolery she won fair and square but i and she can't how good jean
01:06:16she's never been able to cook anything in her life pamela if i know how much this was going to upset you or
01:06:20how you were going to react i i would have just given up and let you win you and me both
01:06:23where's my helen she's in her room facetiming with her dad thank you sure
01:06:31well i don't know if it's a head injury or not but i want to apologize to all of you
01:06:39every year i get so obsessed with winning that i let it become my identity
01:06:44but as i look around and see all of your faces i realize that i've already won
01:06:52because i live on evergreen lane
01:06:53and there's no place like home
01:06:59uh you guys i'm so sorry to interrupt this very sweet moment then don't
01:07:03but i have news it looks like channel six wants to come out and live stream the carnival spooky alley and
01:07:09all looks like we better haul out the halloween
01:07:19okay everyone everyone thank you thank you so much for coming on such short notice
01:07:25an opportunity has presented itself and i just had to share and bring it to a vote
01:07:30i got a text from ashton ashworth at channel six and it looks like they want to come back to the lane
01:07:36what about that smear piece she did about us it wasn't exactly a smear jared did go full billy
01:07:43corgan on those pumpkins he did i'm taking full responsibility for my actions apparently it was
01:07:47great for ratings for the network and they want to come back and cover the carnival and the spooky
01:07:51alley i think this could take our fundraiser to the next level i think we should do it guys they
01:07:55lived here like five minutes i'm just saying you know but it's fundraising you know it's for the
01:08:00kids but you know it still seems really fishy to me i smell a conspiracy can't risk any more bad press
01:08:05guys guys guys come on it's time to help a prez out listen when i had to relinquish my powers to
01:08:12my better half i realized something i realized that serving this community it's a privilege i let my anger
01:08:20get the best of me and i was a very poor example of how our leader should be luckily you guys
01:08:25cared about me enough to give me a second chance now it's our chance to come together as a community
01:08:31and a neighborhood and celebrate in front of the entire state of utah and a few select counties in
01:08:36idaho wyoming and nevada depending on local tv markets yes ned not important but sure yeah the
01:08:45point is it's time we back up our humble president and we show everyone what halloween means to us
01:08:50us what do you say are you in yeah i'm in ever scream on three one two three
01:08:55ever scream
01:09:01oh hey did you ever bob for apples oh you better believe it oh well we're on here we go
01:09:07all right that way they call it bobbing for apples leave them alone it'll keep them busy till
01:09:19nap time smart inflatables are not scary and if they get unplugged did you i mean the illusion is
01:09:27ruined the idea is for the kids have a good time not sitting at home with night terrors look at this
01:09:31it's horrifying okay okay we're gonna mix her and also the animatronic chucky doll but i'm keeping
01:09:36the homemade babadoop oh keep the babadoop guys i'm a little worried about the costume contest we
01:09:41don't have any signups i mean my parents are given jared said he's preparing something other than that it
01:09:45is slow and i'm just worried we won't have a lot of foot traffic you know for the spooky alley i just hope
01:09:49the rumors aren't true what rumors oh i i don't like to gossip says a woman who invented the avril
01:09:55levine conspiracy oh i have my reasons and quite compelling evidence i might add thank you i don't
01:10:01care about that belinda tell me what you heard please spill it honey you gotta go listen i don't
01:10:05know what they've been talking about i'm scared we've been gone for months i don't care if you're
01:10:08scared grab a couple cans all right you know mary louise's hairdresser britney bateman girl can frost
01:10:13the top and that's no rumor apparently her sister-in-law heidi birch works out at train
01:10:18insane when none other than ashlyn ashworth she said they're only covering the spooky alley for
01:10:24clickbait what oh i don't understand she's hoping it's going to be a train wreck like the pumpkin
01:10:30contest what do you got i got nothing and after what she posted about pamela from the beastly bake-off
01:10:36how do you suppose she heard about that do you reckon i've kept in touch with her mother i didn't know
01:10:41the phone call was on the record yeah there was always something strange about ashlyn didn't you tell
01:10:46me that when you were in high school they called her schlin shady yes technically but that was kind of
01:10:51my fault i don't think she has an ulterior motive oh really you don't think she does oh i hope so but
01:10:55you know after that first news piece went viral doesn't look like the rest of the neighborhood is
01:11:00so confident rumor or not we can't let this thing fail it's for charity now and we're going to prove
01:11:05everyone wrong yes you know marvin and i are all in thank you i don't doubt it and you can put bob and
01:11:10i down too yeah we've been cooking up something that's uh electrifying really what is that you can put down
01:11:16d j frankenstein about another word mary louise i do not want any spoilers that's exactly what jared
01:11:25said he's not doing something with you no he insisted on doing something solo what about you
01:11:29guys ned asked me to join up with him really where are you going us i'd tell you but he made me sign
01:11:33an airtight non-disclosure agreement i will say the stakes are very high with this one what does airtight
01:11:41mean to you exactly and what about you pamela don't ask you know that helen and i are ride or
01:11:46die i wasn't asking to tag along i have something very special up my sleeve anyway well i hope that
01:11:51it's spooky because we've got something that's going to push that nosferatu meter to a high five
01:12:00ah yeah touchdown bob now empty those tubs because they're contaminated
01:12:05you're a lucky lady mary louise i don't know why that keeps happening to you graham
01:12:16you trying to tell me something i don't know what the stress levels are like on the other side there but
01:12:22let me tell you they're getting pretty high around here i'm just trying to balance it all you know jared
01:12:29and the hoa and my work and all the activities and i really just want to make you proud
01:12:37she is bro
01:12:40you sure about that
01:12:43yeah
01:12:46the whole neighborhood is especially me
01:12:50i'm proud of you too
01:12:51even after my near impeachment okay so it wasn't exactly your brightest moment but it did show me
01:12:59how much you care about your mom and i love that about you i love everything about you
01:13:10i gotta tell you there was this moment at the bake-off when they announced my name is the winner
01:13:17it was the first time i had heard someone else say it out loud emily farnsworth i just had this surge
01:13:25of joy and love and it just filled my heart from bottom to top that is of course until it was totally
01:13:32ruined when pamela face planted into the ground but for a moment it was perfect
01:13:39i'm so proud to be married to you thank you for saying that i needed to hear that
01:13:50i feel like i was really good at being your boyfriend your fiancee like i'm dropping the ball
01:13:56that allows your husband oh honey come on marriage this is new for both of us i mean there's no shame in
01:14:03needing practice yeah i think if we're willing to be honest about what's going on inside the good
01:14:09the bad the ugly i think we'll be just fine yeah i think so too i am a little worried about all
01:14:19these rumors that are going around about ashlyn ashworth i i just i i don't even know what to
01:14:23believe anymore even if they are true so what this entire neighborhood is pulling together and if she
01:14:28thinks that we're gonna fall apart on live tv she's dead wrong you're absolutely right this neighborhood
01:14:35is so special and if people don't get it that's on them you know what i'm gonna stay up and work on my
01:14:44book a little bit okay you don't have to wait up like all the time you need because i am planning a
01:14:52little surprise for us are you a good witch or a bad witch i was gonna ask you the same thing why
01:15:05i'm clearly glinda the good i know sorry i don't know why i said that you look cute but what's with
01:15:09the headset well somebody's got to run the show so i get that i'm excited where's your husband oh he's
01:15:15been out running errands for the carnival all day i think he's waiting for the big reveal he doesn't
01:15:19want anyone to see his costume till the last minute i'll make sure the cameras are rolling
01:15:24okay yeah um i should probably go all right thanks ty let's get b-roll
01:15:32well i know they say wickedness was never happiness but this outfit begs to differ you look amazing
01:15:37thank you where is your costume i told you it's a surprise okay well you better hurry up i can't be
01:15:43seen with a halloween humbug i would not dream of it i don't know what to think i just can't tell
01:15:49if she's up to no good it doesn't matter look at this cul-de-sac you're literally surrounded by
01:15:55loved ones you got this there you go gotta go
01:16:03what are you 30 no out of here out you did my taxes last year you can't trick or treat you're too old
01:16:31i'm afraid as a dinosaur while i move and you and don't come back
01:16:39i hope it picks up i'm not worried you think has anything to do with pretty pink princess over
01:16:43there i mean i hope not oh yeah i see how it is you don't show up for helen's harp recital but you
01:16:50make it to the halloween party sorry sis you know i can't pass up a good old-fashioned fright fest it is a
01:16:56full moon but keep the scares to a minimum emily will have you removed from the premises true i'm
01:17:01more teen wolf than full-blown lichen but lichen is nerdy little brother speak for werewolf the lore
01:17:07is very important to me especially at this time of year do you accept cashier's checks sure i don't
01:17:12see why not thank you you're welcome these are great by the way yeah all right scare you guys later
01:17:19bucky this isn't costco those aren't free samples no no let him have it like it or not the man is generous
01:17:36who dares receive each other as we shall make our grease and clamor roar upon his death and now
01:17:50straight from transylvania some dark magic from dracula i want to blow your mind
01:17:57false face must hide with the false heart doth know i hope i haven't made a mistake
01:18:13you are like me now my love all right everybody let's give it up for dj frankenstein and his bouffet
01:18:22if you're looking at our costumes and you're feeling kind of jelly i'll tell you a story by the
01:18:31lady mary shelley the stale is guaranteed to send a shiver down your spine it's about the one and only
01:18:36dr frankenstein he ignored his friends at school and didn't listen to his teachers he went around
01:18:41his lab just to work on his creature it took a bolt of lightning to bring the thing to life and then when
01:18:47he was done he started working on his wife dr what dr dr dr frankenstein doctor who dr dr dr frankenstein
01:19:01hey hey i i should have said this earlier but i just wanted to thank you for your kindness
01:19:09it meant a lot to jared and all of us really that you were willing to give us a second chance
01:19:14please don't mention it and i want to give you something it's it's not totally finished the dummy
01:19:20but in the spirit of ever scream lane it's about a little scarecrow who loves the tricks of halloween
01:19:25and a witch who loves the treats and well they figure out that they can both have a happy halloween
01:19:32it's so cute oh look it's us who did this oh i did it yeah i i did it i
01:19:39you know this whole season has been full of ups and downs but it's really inspired
01:19:44me to get back to doing what i love and you were a huge part of that i don't understand you've just
01:19:49always known what you wanted and you've gone for it and i truly admired that and i may have gotten a
01:19:55little sidetracked but i realized i gotta get back to doing what i love which is writing books well thank
01:20:01you for this and thank you for what you said when you visited the studio it really helped me put everything
01:20:08into perspective i could have been a lot nicer to you as well maybe now we can start over i'd really
01:20:15like that yeah yeah i'd really like that and uh just a heads up you might want to send some more
01:20:23volunteers to the ticket booth oh really well i've been sharing the fun on my stories and the word is
01:20:27really spreading you're about to have a lot more visitors headed your way oh thank you we're ready for
01:20:32them ladies and gentlemen it's time for our special guest nickelback on elm street i love nickelback
01:20:45give it up for the lead singer chatty krueger
01:20:48i realized when i was picking out this chatty krueger outfit that was the old jared thinking now i'm
01:21:05thinking as your husband what i really wanted was something for for us that's what this is what is this
01:21:13step into my lair oh look at their costumes could they be more adorable no someone surprised me with
01:21:32a couple's costume after all i like this so much i'm not gonna take it off i don't think i could take
01:21:36these off if i wanted to pamela sewed my shirt into my pants thanks again for making the fundraiser happen
01:21:42guys they are still counting donations but we have already earned double what we did last
01:21:48we should get some mead by the way a courier dropped this off today you were busy with your tape
01:21:54major so i told him i would give it to you okay thanks what's this it's velvet
01:21:59i got it we're going to norway that is if my wife and i agree after an in-depth discussion
01:22:16there you go okay but tonight's not about santa we may only have a few hours left to celebrate
01:22:26before christmas takes over so what do you say we give halloween all we got happy halloween
01:22:33and thus began a new chapter in the story of evergreen lane we became the annual go-to
01:22:47place for trick-or-treating and the spooky alley fundraiser was a huge success in order to keep the
01:22:53peace we let pamela and helen win the costume contest the excitement of my new children's book
01:22:59along with jared's loving support gave me the confidence to quit my job and pursue writing
01:23:04full-time i know what gram gram was trying to tell me the true spirit of halloween is about
01:23:10remembering the ones you love and having fun and creating memories with those that are still here
01:23:15if you can remember that and pass the tradition on to the next generation that spirit will never truly die
01:23:45so
01:23:56you
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