- 2 weeks ago
Life changes overnight for a man who gets the old phone number of a sports legend. Fame and fortune seem close, but the past brings more than he bargained for.
Category
🎥
Short filmTranscript
00:00:00I haven't been this beat up since my Aunt Fifi's bridal shower.
00:00:16Guys, I'm gonna make this right.
00:00:17The ride's over, Brett.
00:00:19Yeah, you're on your own, pal.
00:00:20Now, fellas.
00:00:23Come on.
00:00:26Who would have thought a simple change of phone number
00:00:28could have caused so many problems?
00:00:31You actually thought that you could use my own number
00:00:34and pretend to be me for your own personal gain.
00:00:38You're moron!
00:00:39Go right ahead.
00:00:41Judge me.
00:00:42Girls?
00:00:43But to fully understand the pickle I got myself into,
00:00:46I think we should start from the beginning.
00:00:48You hug the seat,
00:00:49and you, big boy,
00:00:51you go right up the middle.
00:00:54Ready?
00:00:55No, man.
00:00:56No cuts.
00:00:58Time out.
00:00:59Hey, baby.
00:01:00Aren't you supposed to be at work?
00:01:01We're the kids in the school
00:01:17We get trashed and we break all the rules
00:01:21We try to drag us to the office
00:01:23But what do they do?
00:01:26We puff, puff, puff, suck
00:01:28A cigarette till we've gotten enough here
00:01:32The teachers pulling out the head
00:01:34Cause there's nothing they can do
00:01:35We're probably not a joke
00:01:37Hey, mister
00:01:38We ain't going nowhere
00:01:41Hey, mister
00:01:44We ain't going nowhere, nowhere, nowhere, nowhere, nowhere
00:01:49And that, my friends, is how a guy catches a Class A case of the stink
00:02:03Hey, you boxed me out, you can't even get out of the door
00:02:06Come on, man, this is the box out, right there, right there, boom, boom!
00:02:08Come on, guys, boom!
00:02:09You didn't need that.
00:02:10It's great. One way to make more room in the truck.
00:02:12Nice.
00:02:13Ah, piss warm, but so be it.
00:02:15Whoever invented yoga pants deserves a Nobel piece of a
00:02:18What?
00:02:19What?
00:02:20Oh, man, what?
00:02:21I don't know.
00:02:22I don't know.
00:02:23I'm a little bit more.
00:02:24I'm a little bit more.
00:02:25I don't know.
00:02:26Let's get out of the box.
00:02:27Come on, man, you boxed me out, you can't even get out of the door.
00:02:28This is the box out.
00:02:29Right there, right there, right there.
00:02:30Boom, boom, boom!
00:02:31Oh, guys, boom!
00:02:32Yeah, we didn't need that.
00:02:33It's great.
00:02:34One way to make more room in the truck.
00:02:35Nice.
00:02:36Ah, piss warm but so be it.
00:02:38Whoever invented yoga pants deserves a Nobel piece of a
00:02:42price.
00:02:43What?
00:02:46What?
00:02:47you gotta talk you got the stink ready boy and a bad mother in case of it
00:02:54i'm kidding since jules dumped my sorry tell me about it that girl full of puked in her mouth
00:03:00when she saw you all you have to do is be confident who you are and you can have anything
00:03:05or anyone you want yeah fake it till you make it act like you're packing a baker's dust
00:03:09that's your phone again i'll check it later what is that oh that's jules ain't it yes ain't it
00:03:16mind your own business hey give it all give it up give it up come on what the come on chie don't
00:03:22holy sh** bass man jules just sent brett a texter for blowing some dude don't f***ing tease me like
00:03:29that chi this one plays for the jets and unlike you he has endurance oh that is grim it only
00:03:35happened one time it was supposed to be a quick let me see it give me my phone topping it all
00:03:42off i was forced to wash down the sandwich of jules cheating by moving to where the
00:03:46rent was cheapest hey boys hey ma here we go boys yeah we got 30 seconds left g check it we're
00:03:58gonna steal this game keep counting your chickens son my family's still up by one yeah but we got
00:04:02the saint yo do you think cuz this is where tyson st james is magic he's watching the clock tick down
00:04:08seven six five and the saint throws car into the hole
00:04:13welcome back i'm van savery live from the knights locker room and that was a sizzlerific game one
00:04:26philly came tonight ready to play there he was my childhood idol a new york hero the saint
00:04:34living the dream with millions of dollars a supermodel wife and endless talent on the court
00:04:39oh thanks vance i feel uh it was a good game you know i've got to give all the credit to my teammates
00:04:44the coaching staff our owner phil page and of course the big guy god so my son has the stink
00:04:52go do something about it i say look at these ball players not much older than you most of them
00:04:57and not a stinky one among them michael he has a successful landscaping business thanks for
00:05:04so gary there's a well-paid suit thank you maureen and you got bupkis thanks ma except a nice face
00:05:13and a silver tongue you want to be a sportscaster be a sportscaster it's not that easy ma nothing's easy
00:05:22i took out a second mortgage to pay for six years of college and here you are back at home
00:05:29unemployed i'll get another job what you need to get first is a good girl or just go out and bang
00:05:35out an ugly one and rebuild from there thanks i'll get right on that well not with this you won't
00:05:40ladies pick up on the little things like duct tape and disgusting bj pics from exes
00:05:48well jules does have nice breasts i'll give her that but a skank's a skank tomorrow when you go
00:05:58job hunting in the city i want you to get a new phone and a new number oh is that really necessary
00:06:06i can't afford a new phone well listen i am doing you a favor go prosper
00:06:13and get yourself laid
00:06:16a little birdie told me this in my ear now if new york wins the finals is it true that you'll be
00:06:24donating a million greenbacks to charity you're a good bitch stage not but yeah i've agreed to donate
00:06:33my bonus to jump higher a charity formed by our team owner's daughter nikki page wave to the camera
00:06:39nikki was perfect from the moment i saw her look at that girl but why would a high-class girl like her
00:06:47ever want a schmuck like me she deserved a prince or a saint that was a nice plug on the charity bit
00:06:55very good oh you betcha s-man sure thing so uh you got my kickback
00:07:01if you lost your mind mother shut your mouth and know your role scar be in touch
00:07:10how about the boss's daughter though a charity is worth a man if i get to tap that ass
00:07:18i'd be tapping
00:07:20hey hey hey baby what's going on
00:07:32who are these ho- wait wait wait wait son of a- congrats daddy let's hook up soon
00:07:43exo exo exo you big ah god damn it girl that hurt i done told you i don't know who them
00:07:51are i swear i had the same number since my rookie year he's getting late i had a big night
00:07:59now come on get in the bed and let's celebrate whoa
00:08:03that's what i'm talking about baby serve your king yes yes
00:08:15ah what the f*** diana i told you i had that phone since my rookie year
00:08:21well now it's broke you need a new phone with a new number
00:08:24and amore no pusetta until finals are over
00:08:28what wait a minute you know i can't function without the pusetta
00:08:31or too bad if i find you cheating on me i ruin you right before i take half your money
00:08:38capicci i make love to shower head tonight
00:08:43brad rannald as in the actor
00:08:59Uh, that's Burt Reynolds.
00:09:01Okay.
00:09:02I'm supposed to meet my friend.
00:09:04Are we almost done here?
00:09:08I want you to smack yourself in the face.
00:09:10Hard.
00:09:11What are you talking about?
00:09:12Don't dunk your head in the bucket until I call you back.
00:09:15All set.
00:09:16My guy slipped your phone into the system.
00:09:18Backdated six months.
00:09:20Untraceable.
00:09:21I just need you to assign a number.
00:09:23Want to choose?
00:09:24Well, there's a lot of options.
00:09:26Damn, all my people had that number.
00:09:28It might take some time, but I'll get the word out.
00:09:30Who'll we go?
00:09:31That one.
00:09:32Good choice, Brad Reynolds.
00:09:35Just be careful, because Gianna's keeping a close watch.
00:09:38Maybe you should abstain until the finals are over.
00:09:40Abstain?
00:09:41Are you serious?
00:09:42I'm not like other athletes, Scar.
00:09:44I need .
00:09:45My game depends on it.
00:09:47I know, baby, I know.
00:09:50It was a relief to be free of texts from crazy jewels.
00:09:54But what I got instead was a stream of cryptic messages.
00:09:57York House.
00:09:59Cool.
00:10:00I've been kicked out of there twice.
00:10:02Nikki Page has always been an obsession of mine.
00:10:05If I can bang that out, I know I can win the finals.
00:10:08On it.
00:10:09Meanwhile, there's an escort waiting inside.
00:10:11Custom fit.
00:10:15She know what she's signing up for.
00:10:17Already paid her extra.
00:10:18Room 1302.
00:10:19That reminds me.
00:10:20I should call this guy back before he drowns.
00:10:21Yeah, you do that.
00:10:22That afternoon, Paz helped me hunt for temp jobs by calling around to his buddies in the blue-collar mafia.
00:10:34You have no idea how much power these guys actually wield around town.
00:10:38Don't believe me?
00:10:39Talk to the deputy mayor when city hall sewage pipes back up next Thursday and crap flows like the Nile.
00:10:46The mob can kill you.
00:10:48But the BCM can make your life miserable.
00:10:55Yo!
00:10:56What's the emergency?
00:10:57You're not gonna believe this, man.
00:10:58What?
00:10:59I got a text on my new phone, right?
00:11:00Telling us to go to the York house.
00:11:01Now, I think it's just you messing with us.
00:11:03But when we get there, look what's waiting for us.
00:11:09Gold bling and killer bud, dude.
00:11:12Stop playing.
00:11:13Sweet, right?
00:11:14What do I do, G?
00:11:15I just stole thousands of dollars.
00:11:17Stole?
00:11:18Bro.
00:11:19This is a swag bag.
00:11:21A what?
00:11:22Gratis.
00:11:23Rich people get this for free all the time.
00:11:25Keep it, dog.
00:11:26Oh, that's pimp.
00:11:29Really?
00:11:30I'm not sure how I feel about this.
00:11:33Well, how about we test out this spankity-dankity and then see how you feel.
00:11:42I'm in.
00:11:43Just if you were wondering, I'm in.
00:11:45Definitely.
00:11:47So I did what any red-blooded American would do.
00:11:49Got high as a kite.
00:11:51And by the time we finished smoking, my phone was blowing up.
00:11:55Again, this thing is non-stop.
00:12:01I say we go.
00:12:02It's because you're stoned and .
00:12:03I say we return the phone.
00:12:05What?
00:12:06Come on, yo, this is ours.
00:12:07That's like the hottest club in town.
00:12:08If you want to meet Movers and Shakers, Mr. Sportscaster, that is where they hang.
00:12:12And what is your question, monsieur?
00:12:15So I think my wife is sleeping with a co-worker, but it could also be in my head because my numbers are down this month and then he's killing it.
00:12:22What do you think?
00:12:23Never look a butterfly in the eye when it's time for bees to meet.
00:12:26Yeah, you're right, Henry.
00:12:27Thanks a lot, man.
00:12:28Thanks a lot.
00:12:29Thanks a lot.
00:12:30Here's something extra for you.
00:12:31Fuck that .
00:12:32Gotta love this guy.
00:12:33He's a fucking Yoda of hot dog cars.
00:12:34That made sense to you?
00:12:35Yo, you're next.
00:12:36Ask him about Oz.
00:12:37Uh, two footlongs with, uh, mustard and ketchup.
00:12:38And, uh, Henri, I have a question, too.
00:12:39Uh, so there's this club, like...
00:12:40Uh, should we go to Oz or should I return the phone?
00:12:44It is what it is.
00:12:45It be what it be.
00:12:46Sometimes you're the dog.
00:12:47Sometimes you're the tree.
00:12:48Okay.
00:12:49Yo, yo, yo, yo, yo.
00:12:50My main man.
00:12:51You're next.
00:12:52You're next.
00:12:53You're next.
00:12:54Ask him about Oz.
00:12:55Uh, two footlongs with, uh, mustard and ketchup.
00:12:57And, uh, Henri, I have a question, too.
00:12:58Uh, should we go to Oz or should I return the phone?
00:13:01It is what it is.
00:13:03It be what it be.
00:13:04Sometimes you're the dog.
00:13:05Sometimes you're the tree.
00:13:07Okay.
00:13:08Yo, yo, yo, yo.
00:13:09My main man, Henri.
00:13:10The usual.
00:13:11Will I?
00:13:12Oui, monsieur.
00:13:13You will get laid tonight.
00:13:14Deux fois.
00:13:15I told you.
00:13:16F***ing Yoda.
00:13:17Hey, Henri.
00:13:18I already know the key to the universe is f***ing.
00:13:19So I'm gonna get two dogs heavy on the crowd.
00:13:22What do I got to lose?
00:13:23What do I got to lose?
00:13:25What do I got to lose?
00:13:30What do I got to lose?
00:13:33Oz was everything I dreamed it would be.
00:13:47Where the pretty people rubbed elbows and various other body parts.
00:13:51The guy who had this number before me had a life that I didn't.
00:13:54And right about now, I needed it.
00:13:56And so the boy told us to take care of you, so we're gonna put you on that prime seating area.
00:14:06That'll work.
00:14:07For real.
00:14:08So who's your boy anyway?
00:14:09I knew this was a bad, stupid, dumb, moronic, idiotic idea.
00:14:13Honestly, I have no idea.
00:14:14Good kid way to keep it discreet.
00:14:17Listen, the bottle's on us, don't even tip.
00:14:19And Big Sweat knows I'll let you bring ladies up from the dance floor.
00:14:22You need anything?
00:14:23Have a good sip.
00:14:25She's cute.
00:14:26She's like the Barbra Streisand, but now, my type.
00:14:34Guys, I'm gonna roll a few Appletinis and circle back.
00:14:38And don't worry, the past man got it under control.
00:14:42Listen, if you're not gonna at least pretend to try to impress me, I'm never going home with you.
00:14:52Hey, uh, how about we head to my crib and smoke a little cheaper?
00:14:56I'm in.
00:14:57Okay.
00:14:59Gotta find paths, let them know we're out.
00:15:02Let's split up.
00:15:03I got the girls.
00:15:04So focus, son.
00:15:06Find your game.
00:15:07Don't be stinking up the stabbing cabin.
00:15:10Ladies.
00:15:11Consider roofs to be your fucking night.
00:15:17Get your hand off of me.
00:15:19Hey, what the?
00:15:20Hey, man, that's enough.
00:15:21Hey, who the are you?
00:15:22Enough.
00:15:23I'll end you.
00:15:24Oh, yeah?
00:15:25Whoa, look.
00:15:28Hey.
00:15:35Oh.
00:15:40It's you.
00:15:41Do I know you?
00:15:42No, no.
00:15:43I'm, uh...
00:15:44Yo, Brett!
00:15:45Dance!
00:15:46Dance!
00:15:47Dance!
00:15:48Dance!
00:15:49Oh, no.
00:15:50Excuse me.
00:15:51Yeah.
00:15:53Yeah.
00:15:55Okay.
00:15:56All right, buddy.
00:15:57I danced.
00:15:58I danced.
00:15:59I danced.
00:16:00Yes, you danced.
00:16:01I danced.
00:16:02I danced.
00:16:03Oh, man.
00:16:04I did the cha-cha.
00:16:05I danced.
00:16:06You did.
00:16:07Wow.
00:16:08This is his address.
00:16:09You take the tunnel, he'll wake up on Route 3.
00:16:11He always does.
00:16:12Thanks.
00:16:13Goodnight, buddy.
00:16:14Hey.
00:16:15You have a cell phone case.
00:16:16Hey.
00:16:17I wanted to thank you for saving me from Mr. Date Right.
00:16:19I owe you.
00:16:20Brett.
00:16:21Right?
00:16:22Yeah.
00:16:23And you're Nikki.
00:16:24How did you know that?
00:16:25Oh, I, uh, I saw you last night.
00:16:27Uh, but not in a stalker way.
00:16:30No.
00:16:31No.
00:16:32No.
00:16:33No.
00:16:34No.
00:16:35No.
00:16:36No.
00:16:37No.
00:16:38No.
00:16:39No.
00:16:40No.
00:16:41No.
00:16:42No.
00:16:43No.
00:16:44No.
00:16:45No.
00:16:46No.
00:16:47No.
00:16:48No.
00:16:49Hey, how you doing?
00:16:50I'm G.
00:16:51And I would like to apologize for everything he just said.
00:16:54Yeah.
00:16:55I mean on TV, your charity.
00:16:58Are we, like, going?
00:16:59Or, like, not?
00:17:01Yes.
00:17:02Absolutely.
00:17:06Looks like you're in for a treat.
00:17:08Actually, the girls are both going home with G.
00:17:12Oh.
00:17:16Later.
00:17:17Wow.
00:17:19You need a cab?
00:17:21No.
00:17:23No, I'm actually waiting for my friends.
00:17:25Oh, cool.
00:17:27You maybe want to go out sometime?
00:17:29A fellow Nightsman.
00:17:31Oh, nice.
00:17:33And you weren't actually gonna go home with 3LD.
00:17:37No.
00:17:39Because that would have been a really big sacrifice just to...
00:17:43ask me out.
00:17:45Ask me out.
00:17:47Well, I am...
00:17:49asking.
00:17:53Out of unread messages.
00:17:55Party invites.
00:17:57Nikki, come on.
00:17:59Don't lose my number.
00:18:01Not a chance.
00:18:03Bye.
00:18:05Bye.
00:18:07Wow.
00:18:09I couldn't believe it.
00:18:11In a single day, I had partied with New York's elite
00:18:13and met the girl of my dreams.
00:18:17What other powers did my new best friend possess?
00:18:19He brought the all-around game,
00:18:21and the Saint played the rim well
00:18:23with eight rebounds and 24 points last night.
00:18:25The key thing is, he can't carry the whole load.
00:18:27But he does promise to give a million dollars
00:18:29to the Jump Higher charity for underprivileged kids.
00:18:31So stay tuned, because Billy is back here on Tuesday
00:18:37in the house the Saint built for game two of the finals.
00:18:41Of the finals.
00:18:43Holy sh...
00:18:49Oh, you 100%.
00:18:51I got 18 texts so far.
00:18:55Five of them confirmed without a doubt.
00:18:57Can you please bounce that ball a little softer?
00:19:01Trust me, guys.
00:19:03It's the Saints.
00:19:05I don't know, guys.
00:19:07As much as I loved last night,
00:19:09thinking I'm gonna go to the store today
00:19:11and get a new number.
00:19:13Are you nuts? You struck gold.
00:19:15Yeah, Pazman speaks the truth.
00:19:17Score with this, Nikki chick,
00:19:19and take advantage of the access.
00:19:21Sure, until I get caught.
00:19:23Why, you think the Saints get these messages too?
00:19:25Nah, it's gotta be an old number.
00:19:27I'm getting texts from girls
00:19:29wondering why he's not responding.
00:19:31Whoa.
00:19:32You're not responding?
00:19:34I'd say what?
00:19:36Guys, it turns out that my childhood hero
00:19:38isn't just secretly a major player.
00:19:40He is f***ing Caligula.
00:19:42That's crazy, yo.
00:19:43With that primo supermodel of Wayne at home,
00:19:45I'd be ordering take-in every night.
00:19:47Dude, you have to respond to these texts
00:19:49and keep it going.
00:19:50And what else has come in?
00:19:52Well, let's see here.
00:19:54Aside from the nasty sexting
00:19:57and the multiple titty shots,
00:19:59he just got a text from a car dealer
00:20:01offering to let him test drive the new Bentley
00:20:04for a month, no obligations.
00:20:06And I suppose the Saint could, I don't know,
00:20:09send over an assistant to pick up the car?
00:20:11No f***ing way.
00:20:14Yeah!
00:20:15Yeah!
00:20:16Yeah!
00:20:17Yeah!
00:20:18Yeah!
00:20:19Yeah!
00:20:20Yeah!
00:20:21Yeah!
00:20:22Yeah!
00:20:23Yeah!
00:20:24Yeah!
00:20:25A black man driving a Bentley?
00:20:27I am going to speed limit.
00:20:29Yeah!
00:20:30Yeah!
00:20:31Yeah!
00:20:32Yeah!
00:20:33Yeah!
00:20:34Yeah!
00:20:35Yeah!
00:20:36Yeah!
00:20:37Yeah!
00:20:38It's a thing of beauty.
00:20:39Well, you are not lying.
00:20:40Dude, it's so easy.
00:20:42They just hand me the keys and say,
00:20:43say hi to the saint.
00:20:44All right.
00:20:47We need some ground rules.
00:20:49Goldfold rule number one,
00:20:51we only take what's coming to us.
00:20:53Goldfold rule number two,
00:20:55we can imply that we know him,
00:20:57but we never use the saint's name.
00:20:59Not spoken, not in text, nothing.
00:21:01Mm-hmm.
00:21:02And number three,
00:21:03we don't steal anything.
00:21:05All the offers have to be gratis,
00:21:06no strings attached, just like the car.
00:21:08Got it?
00:21:09Totally.
00:21:10Okay.
00:21:11Let's see what this b**** can do.
00:21:13Couple of misfits walking through life
00:21:15with our middle fingers up
00:21:16cause we don't give a f****
00:21:18Just a couple of misfits trying to get a quick fix
00:21:21selling our soul for a b****
00:21:23A couple of misfits walking through life
00:21:26with our middle fingers up
00:21:27just we don't give a f****
00:21:29Just a couple of misfits trying to get a quick fix
00:21:32selling our soul for a b****
00:21:34The phone was magic.
00:21:37It was opening doors that my a** could never open on my own.
00:21:40Suddenly, I had a surge of newfound confidence.
00:21:43I was the man.
00:21:44In fact, the phone had become my secret weapon
00:21:47to eradicate this thing.
00:21:49Three, two, one, out!
00:21:54You can't talk s*** right?
00:21:56Until you, until you...
00:21:57You know how to play some basketball!
00:21:58You can't talk!
00:21:59I got up!
00:22:00If Rebus would've played,
00:22:01it would've been crazy!
00:22:02If Rebus would've played,
00:22:03it would've been crazy!
00:22:04We would've killed the founders!
00:22:05Founders about as good as the gum on my show!
00:22:07If Rebus would've played,
00:22:08we would've won that game!
00:22:09Yeah, if Rebus would've played,
00:22:10we would've won that game!
00:22:11We would've won that game!
00:22:12Moses would've split the old s***!
00:22:15That's great!
00:22:16Big smiles, everybody!
00:22:18Thank you so much for having us in your home.
00:22:20Anything for you and the kids, Nikki.
00:22:22One more!
00:22:23And again, I am so sorry that your secret got out there.
00:22:25I've grilled everybody at a charity,
00:22:27but I can't seem to get a culprit.
00:22:29Sports reporters can play dirty.
00:22:31But look on the bright side.
00:22:32It frees me up to do more publicity for you.
00:22:34Big smiles!
00:22:36All right, that's it!
00:22:37So, kids, let's wave goodbye to the saints!
00:22:40Bye!
00:22:41Bye, guys!
00:22:42So precious.
00:22:45So cute.
00:22:46Yes, they are the future.
00:22:47Yeah.
00:22:48Hey, how about we exchange numbers?
00:22:49I, uh, have this event later,
00:22:51if you want to join.
00:22:52Oh, I...
00:22:53I would, but I...
00:22:55I have...
00:22:56Kind of.
00:22:57But really, thank you so much.
00:22:59You really are amazing.
00:23:01And, um, I hope you and Gianna have fun tonight.
00:23:05Thanks.
00:23:06Bye.
00:23:07Thanks.
00:23:08You look like Paige's little girl's playing hard to get.
00:23:10You can't just go full force like that.
00:23:11You've got to grease her up first.
00:23:12I think.
00:23:13Why the hell do you think I'm doing this charity bullshit?
00:23:14Last I heard Nikki didn't have a man.
00:23:15I'll find out what changed.
00:23:16Well, do it and do it fast.
00:23:17Five days without a nut is draining my battery.
00:23:18I need...
00:23:19I need it.
00:23:20I'm trying.
00:23:21Make something happen.
00:23:32Because I need to recharge my mojo.
00:23:34So.
00:23:36How's this?
00:23:37Because I need to recharge my mojo.
00:23:40Soon.
00:23:48How's this?
00:23:49You'll be at Jonna's fashion show Friday, right?
00:23:52Unfortunately, why?
00:23:53We use it as cover.
00:23:56When the show starts, Jonna will be on the runway.
00:23:58For the next 30 minutes, you can play out any fantasy you like.
00:24:02I'll reserve a private room in the basement.
00:24:04I've used it before.
00:24:06All right, fine.
00:24:07Give me three girls, Neapolitan style,
00:24:09and make sure they know what they're up for.
00:24:11Circus is coming to town?
00:24:13Goddamn right.
00:24:16We'll have your best caviar with the cabernet
00:24:19while we decide on entrees.
00:24:23I apologize, sir,
00:24:25but we do not offer caviar for complimentary guests.
00:24:29Complimentary?
00:24:30I appreciate the gesture,
00:24:32but I can cover our bill just fine.
00:24:34Ooh.
00:24:36Uh, so it must be fun
00:24:39working with your dad and the team, huh?
00:24:42I really just try and focus on my charity.
00:24:43The kids are my team.
00:24:44There's this girl named Rachel,
00:24:45and she just loves basketball.
00:24:47And when she has the ball in her hand,
00:24:49she just...
00:24:49Your phone sure goes off a lot.
00:24:53I'm sorry.
00:24:53Let me just...
00:24:55Yeah, yeah, sure.
00:24:56Go ahead.
00:25:09I'm sorry.
00:25:10We owe him, him!
00:25:17Caviar will be right out.
00:25:22Honestly, I hate caviar.
00:25:26You serious?
00:25:27Yeah.
00:25:28I'm more of a burger dog kind of girl.
00:25:32I'm sorry if I disappointed you.
00:25:33Are you kidding me?
00:25:34I had no idea how I was gonna choke this crap down.
00:25:39You like dogs?
00:25:40I got the spot.
00:25:43Here it is.
00:25:43Willie, we're out.
00:25:48Put it on my tab.
00:26:08That is incredible.
00:26:10Nikki Page.
00:26:11New York Nights fans want to know.
00:26:13You love basketball.
00:26:15You hate fancy restaurants.
00:26:17You love Shea Sabre.
00:26:19So what's your story?
00:26:22Is this an interview?
00:26:23Or a date?
00:26:25Can you help out a future sportscaster?
00:26:27All right.
00:26:29Shoot.
00:26:30So, Miss Page,
00:26:32America wants to know
00:26:33how you got to be so awesome.
00:26:36Oh, no.
00:26:37No, I wouldn't say awesome,
00:26:39but I come from a good family.
00:26:42My dad's a blue-collar guy
00:26:43who worked his tail off
00:26:44to get to where he is,
00:26:45so he's a huge inspiration to me.
00:26:48I try and live up to that.
00:26:50But when it really comes down to it,
00:26:53I'm just a simple girl from Jersey.
00:26:56Wait.
00:26:57You're from Jersey?
00:26:58That's where I live.
00:27:00I thought you said you lived in Tribeca.
00:27:03Well, yeah, now,
00:27:05but that's where I grew up.
00:27:06I didn't know you were Jersey.
00:27:07Yeah, foreign bred.
00:27:10Oh.
00:27:13But sadly,
00:27:15I don't really get back much.
00:27:17Well, how about a boat ride?
00:27:20I got a hookup.
00:27:21Nothing like watching the city
00:27:23as you drift away.
00:27:25Works great on dates.
00:27:26Well, since this is a date,
00:27:30I will confirm the effectiveness.
00:27:33Well, you better be careful.
00:27:34This boat thing is a pretty smooth move.
00:27:36I call it the reverse Titanic.
00:27:39Why's that?
00:27:40I'm the king of the city!
00:27:47Do you trust me?
00:27:51A certain story goes,
00:27:53and so I've heard it said
00:27:54that you left your land
00:27:56betrayed for a place so far away
00:27:57so out of date
00:27:58that only you could understand
00:28:00And at the ceiling of my feeling
00:28:03backed up against the wall
00:28:06Sweet thing,
00:28:07you know I fall in line
00:28:10You better dig
00:28:12And take a look inside yourself
00:28:16She
00:28:20She
00:28:21Wants to be free
00:28:26And I
00:28:31I
00:28:32I
00:28:33I
00:28:34I
00:28:35I
00:28:36I
00:28:37I
00:28:38I
00:28:39I
00:28:40I
00:28:41I
00:28:53I
00:28:54I
00:28:55I keep on waiting for the shoe to drop.
00:28:56Are you sure you don't have a wife
00:28:58deep dark secret?
00:29:02I had a girlfriend
00:29:03Yeah?
00:29:03And she was certifiable
00:29:05And I'm not talking normal chick crazy
00:29:07I'm talking
00:29:11Sorry, let me rewind that
00:29:13No, no, I agree
00:29:14Most chicks are crazy
00:29:16Like most guys are liars
00:29:18Liars?
00:29:19It's probably just me
00:29:21But I seem to have a chemical attraction to guys who are truth challenged
00:29:25You don't say
00:29:26Yeah, I mean it's not like I go out looking for them, but somehow they find me or I find them
00:29:34Or maybe I'm just super gullible
00:29:36No
00:29:38I mean it
00:29:40The last guy, he lied about everything
00:29:42His
00:29:43His job
00:29:44His car
00:29:45The fact that he still lives with his mother
00:29:50Anyways
00:29:51This is me
00:29:54He has been
00:29:56Been
00:30:00He
00:30:01He
00:30:02He
00:30:04He
00:30:07He
00:30:08He
00:30:09He
00:30:10He
00:30:11He
00:30:12He
00:30:13He
00:30:14He
00:30:15Always on the run
00:30:24Always on the run
00:30:36On the run
00:30:43With that one incredible kiss
00:30:49I knew she was the one
00:30:52Oh, oh
00:30:57Oh, oh
00:31:00Oh, oh
00:31:02Oh, oh
00:31:04Oh, oh
00:31:05Oh, oh
00:31:08Oh, oh
00:31:10Oh, oh
00:31:12Oh, yeah.
00:31:14Oh, God, no!
00:31:23Vance Avery, as in the sports commentator?
00:31:27Yeah, I found out he's going to the intimate disguise
00:31:31lingerie fashion show on Friday.
00:31:33I think you should totally go and just
00:31:35see if you can strike up a conversation.
00:31:37Oh, yeah, that sounds good.
00:31:40Your laundry's on the bed.
00:31:42Who's that?
00:31:44Um, the maid comes in on Thursdays.
00:31:47Your room's a pigsty, by the way.
00:31:49Wow, she doesn't hold back, does she?
00:31:51Yeah, very judgmental, in fact.
00:31:54Anyway, so I was thinking I would score you some tickets
00:31:59so you can go and meet with him.
00:32:01No, no, no, don't worry about it. I got a hookup.
00:32:04You want chocolate chip pancakes?
00:32:06She cooks, too?
00:32:07Premium service.
00:32:09I should probably tend to the help.
00:32:12Enjoy the game tonight.
00:32:13I'll look out for you.
00:32:14Bye.
00:32:15Bye.
00:32:20What?
00:32:21It's true.
00:32:25They just didn't have an answer for Philly's newfound defense.
00:32:28Tyson St. James couldn't shake his startling 7.3 for 13 shooting performance.
00:32:33Yes!
00:32:34Yes!
00:32:35The eight!
00:32:36Tyson eight James!
00:32:37Erectile dysfunction!
00:32:39It's my boy.
00:32:40What the hell just happened?
00:32:42The start of a comeback, losers!
00:32:44Yes!
00:32:45Look, there she is.
00:32:47Aw, poor little debutante.
00:32:50Yeah, it's not funny, G. She's got a million bucks riding on this.
00:32:52No sympathy.
00:32:53Did you steal the deal last night?
00:32:55Nah, didn't feel right.
00:32:57Oh, G.
00:32:58Ooh, ooh, ooh.
00:32:59You smell something stinky?
00:33:01Oh, yeah, that's some stink, all right.
00:33:03Yeah, guys, I'm serious.
00:33:05I sold her a total bill of goods last night.
00:33:07We gotta find me some bank from this phone, and quick, she's gonna realize I'm not all I said I was.
00:33:12Or you could just tell her the truth.
00:33:14That's not an option.
00:33:15So does that mean we're going to the lingerie show to meet that producer?
00:33:18I'm texting around to find the way in.
00:33:20Uh, yeah!
00:33:22Hey, hold up, hold up, hold up.
00:33:24What about gold phone rule number one?
00:33:26Only take what comes to us.
00:33:27Boo!
00:33:28I want my lingerie.
00:33:30You know that sounds , right?
00:33:32Sometimes rules gotta get broken.
00:33:35Yeah, baby!
00:33:37Scar!
00:33:39I'm dying!
00:33:41We all are, honey.
00:33:43I've got the girls lined up for tomorrow night.
00:33:46Come on.
00:33:47They're most waiting.
00:33:54Son of a...
00:33:55We're at a heart plus two.
00:34:03It's out of here, man.
00:34:04Sorry.
00:34:05I'm making a lot.
00:34:06My guy likes to keep it on the DL.
00:34:08It was a rough game for him last night, huh?
00:34:10Oh, you ain't lying.
00:34:11You ain't lying.
00:34:12Hey, man, it's all cool if you want to text the saint to make sure we're legit.
00:34:16I'll tell you what.
00:34:17Chill here.
00:34:18Let me check things out, all right?
00:34:19You never got on the list, did you?
00:34:21And you just broke gold phone rule number two.
00:34:23Yeah, yeah.
00:34:24Just get ready to run if my plan fails.
00:34:27I'm betting he still has the saint's old phone number.
00:34:31You call that a plan?
00:34:37Oh, bro, I gotta remember that.
00:34:40Easy, Jersey Shore.
00:34:42Oh, sure.
00:34:43I mean, what are we, boys in the hood?
00:34:44I'm pulling the shoes, Mel.
00:34:45Oh, no.
00:34:46Guys, come on, come on.
00:34:47Whoa!
00:34:48Well, looks like him, fellas.
00:34:49Let him in, let him in.
00:34:50Sorry about that.
00:34:51Name's Roddy.
00:34:52Roddy.
00:34:53Have a good time, fellas.
00:34:54All right, playboy.
00:34:55Nah, nah, nah, nah, nah.
00:34:56Watching you all night, kid.
00:34:57Oh, easy, killer.
00:34:59Hasmanian Devil stays in his cage.
00:35:00Name the last time he came out.
00:35:01Oz.
00:35:02Sure.
00:35:03Throw that in my face.
00:35:06Thank you, sweetheart.
00:35:07Could you do me a favor?
00:35:08Can you do me a favor?
00:35:09Oh, man.
00:35:10All right, playboy.
00:35:11All right, playboy.
00:35:12Nah, nah, nah, nah, nah.
00:35:13Watching you all night, kid.
00:35:14Oh, easy, killer.
00:35:15Hasmanian Devil stays in his cage.
00:35:16Name the last time he came out.
00:35:17Oz.
00:35:18Sure.
00:35:19Throw that in my face.
00:35:20No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.
00:35:21No, no, no, no, no, no, no.
00:35:22Thank you, sweetheart.
00:35:24Could you do me a favor?
00:35:25Could you bring my wife another drink in the back?
00:35:27That girly one she likes.
00:35:28I appreciate that.
00:35:29Mm-hmm.
00:35:30So, uh, do you model?
00:35:31I do online ****.
00:35:32I like ****.
00:35:33Keep an eye on the Paz man in the network.
00:35:35Oh, no, no, no, no.
00:35:36No, no, no, no.
00:35:37No, no, no, no, no, no.
00:35:38No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.
00:35:41No, no, no, no, no.
00:35:42No, no, no, no.
00:35:44No, no, no, no, no, no, no.
00:35:47Text St. More than you see.
00:35:59Name any basketball player any year.
00:36:02Come on, man. What are you doing?
00:36:03Do I look like a game show host?
00:36:05Breaking up Ebony and Ivory here.
00:36:08Oh, okay. Okay. You want to play?
00:36:09All right.
00:36:10How about, uh, Jefferson Whitmore?
00:36:13Boom!
00:36:14Six foot four, 180 pounds, play to Arkansas.
00:36:17First rounder in 81, 12th overall.
00:36:20Three seasons with New York, then he went to Denver.
00:36:22Oh, well, well, well.
00:36:24You want to close this deal with some PBG stats?
00:36:2727.3.
00:36:28Oh, boom! What do we have here?
00:36:31Man savory, man, and you are...
00:36:33Brett Reynolds, future sportscaster.
00:36:35You and everybody else, kid.
00:36:39Hey, by the way, Nicky Page says hello.
00:36:43Oh, yeah. How do you know Nicky?
00:36:45We're hanging.
00:36:46Oh, you must talk a good game, huh?
00:36:48Beating out those high-profilers, chasing that tail.
00:36:52You got a real deal reel?
00:36:53You'd watch my reel.
00:36:55This.
00:36:56Don't waste time.
00:36:58I won't...
00:36:59You didn't get it.
00:37:13Did you check this new number?
00:37:15When did he get a new number?
00:37:17Recently.
00:37:18Well, yeah, I guess so.
00:37:19Business calls, ladies.
00:37:30Oh.
00:37:31Peace.
00:37:33The phone was granting my every wish.
00:37:36Text by text, my dreams were starting to materialize.
00:37:39Mr. Bruce, brother, fun!
00:37:55Mr. Bruce, brother, fun!
00:37:57No way, I got one of my sights.
00:38:11Too bad.
00:38:12Guess who I just saw playing Kinky the Clown?
00:38:14My childhood idol.
00:38:16Oh, Scooby-Doo.
00:38:18What?
00:38:18No.
00:38:19The Saint.
00:38:20Wait, he's here.
00:38:21I want to meet him.
00:38:22Yeah, next time.
00:38:22Hey, G, come on.
00:38:23We're out.
00:38:24You loco?
00:38:24I am making fun with the stars.
00:38:26You guys don't understand.
00:38:28So soon?
00:38:29That punk walked in on me.
00:38:31Oh, no.
00:38:32He's talking to the bouncer.
00:38:34You mean that dude standing next to your boy?
00:38:35My what?
00:38:36Your boy.
00:38:37Your boy, Brett.
00:38:37Look, I don't know that mother.
00:38:39Bring it in.
00:38:40Roddy, you watch the door.
00:38:41Me and Scar, we'll flush your mouth.
00:38:43Come on, four, on three.
00:38:44One, two, three.
00:38:45Come on.
00:38:51Incoming.
00:38:53It's definitely time to go.
00:38:54Ah, I'll check out your work.
00:38:57Yeah, me too.
00:38:57I'll check out your work, man.
00:38:59It's about the small things.
00:39:01I'm sorry, man.
00:39:03I'm sorry.
00:39:06Come here.
00:39:07Come here.
00:39:08Come here.
00:39:09Come here.
00:39:09When you're running on, I'm running on, I'm running on, I'm running on, I'm running on.
00:39:11Come on.
00:39:14Deanna!
00:39:15I love Deanna.
00:39:16I'm going to kill you.
00:39:19Come on.
00:39:19I can die now.
00:39:23I had a dream about this once.
00:39:25I love my phone.
00:39:29Again.
00:39:31Marry me.
00:39:33Sorry, guys.
00:39:34You gotta go.
00:39:34Easy, easy.
00:39:43We got eyes.
00:39:44Feed me back to those girls.
00:39:46Too late.
00:39:46John is wrapped.
00:39:47How did they get in there, Scar?
00:39:48Wait a minute.
00:39:49Let me see your phone.
00:39:54He's got your old number.
00:39:55I don't know, dog.
00:40:11It's been a fun ride, but it may be time to hang it up, so to speak.
00:40:15You mean give it back?
00:40:16Guys, you can't be serious.
00:40:18Things are finally starting to go my way.
00:40:19I just had a potential career breakthrough.
00:40:21Things are really happening with Nikki.
00:40:23But you're lying to her, because she thinks you're Mr. Moneybags.
00:40:26Wasn't it you two telling me I need to fake it until I make it?
00:40:29Well, guess what?
00:40:30It worked.
00:40:31And I'm not lying if I can actually get this job and become this guy.
00:40:34Help us out, Armory.
00:40:35Should I keep using this phone?
00:40:38Only the phone knows when it's time to disconnect.
00:40:41Yeah, thanks.
00:40:42Useful as always.
00:40:45Hey, oui, monsieur.
00:40:46You will get laid this weekend.
00:40:48That's good.
00:40:49But you will win the lotto.
00:40:53Wait, no, no, right?
00:40:56There you go, thanks, Armory.
00:40:58Not giving up my phone.
00:40:59I had become addicted to the phone's power, like a junkie looking for a fix.
00:41:05Oh, just scored a Tribeca loft.
00:41:10I was hooked.
00:41:11Looks like the saint is going to hell.
00:41:17I just want some b****!
00:41:20Okay, send me everything you have on him.
00:41:22His name is Brett Reynolds.
00:41:24Where does this guy live?
00:41:25He lived on East 31st Street up until he got your number, then vanished.
00:41:29Sneaky son of a b****!
00:41:31Numbers usually have a waiting period before re-release, but since we had to backdate yours by six months...
00:41:36God damn it.
00:41:37Do you realize the type of text that came into that number on a daily basis?
00:41:42This guy could destroy my image.
00:41:44My marriage.
00:41:45This could cost me my Under Armour endorsement.
00:41:47Which is why we lay low until the finals are over.
00:41:50Agreed?
00:41:51You mean no f******.
00:41:52For all we know, this guy poisoned any number of contacts.
00:41:56We can't trust anyone.
00:41:58Let's just lay low until my guy pulls the phone logs, and then we'll decide on a plan of attack.
00:42:04But Scar, how am I supposed to play tomorrow night's game with no s***?
00:42:12Don't even think about it.
00:42:14Come on, Scar, I mean, this is business.
00:42:16Don't be stingy, I'm desperate!
00:42:17Honey, unless you grew tips and a vajayjay overnight, it ain't happening.
00:42:22That's it.
00:42:30Saints started off better tonight, but the magic, she would not last.
00:42:34With New York down by 24 in the closing minutes, it was Coach P who waved the white flag and took the Saints out of the game.
00:42:40Just a shocking, shocking game five.
00:42:43Put a fork in it, they're done.
00:42:44Lights out on the night.
00:42:45Turn it off, just turn it off.
00:42:49Well, you were going to miss a game down in Philly, that was the one.
00:42:52Well, it's a lot more civilized here than dealing with all those crazy fans at night.
00:43:02I don't know what I'm going to do.
00:43:04What do you mean?
00:43:05Well, let's just say if we don't win the finals, my charity's in some serious trouble.
00:43:10I had no idea.
00:43:11Sorry.
00:43:11No, no, it's not your fault.
00:43:15And, well, at least that really cute couple got engaged on the Jumbotron.
00:43:20Are you serious?
00:43:22That's how my dad proposed, and they're still going strong.
00:43:25Yeah, the fact that he owns the team probably helps with that a little bit.
00:43:29You are such a wise guy.
00:43:33I happen to think Jumbotron professions of love are the most romantic gestures in the entire world.
00:43:41Ooh.
00:43:42What's that?
00:43:43Sorry, never stops.
00:43:51What's that?
00:43:52That was the night I officially lost the stink, and someone else was developing a bad case.
00:44:03God damn it, girl.
00:44:08Would you put some f***ing clothes on?
00:44:10Unless you plan on giving me some loving.
00:44:13My heart's still not rest, amore.
00:44:21And you don't look so hot.
00:44:22But you do, sweetheart.
00:44:24Come here.
00:44:24Mm.
00:44:25Icky.
00:44:26Take a shower.
00:44:27And I go tan by pool.
00:44:33Nerd.
00:44:37You hear that, Horatio?
00:44:38We ain't invited to the pool party.
00:44:40What did you find out?
00:44:46My guy hacked into the phone.
00:44:48This kid Reynolds is either an idiot savant or just a colossal idiot.
00:44:52He's been hitting the scene all over town by pretending to be you.
00:44:56That piece of s***.
00:44:57Now, baby, baby, I want you to keep calm, but it's my job to tell you.
00:45:02You'll never believe which team owner's daughter he's dating.
00:45:12Hey, man, I have to admit, it's a killer reel.
00:45:14You got skills.
00:45:15So give me a job.
00:45:17Reynolds, do you have any idea how many sportscaster wannabes there are out there?
00:45:20Yeah, but how many have the balls to come up to you cold like that?
00:45:23Okay, there's no doubt.
00:45:24You got some nuts.
00:45:25Hi, Vance.
00:45:26Oh.
00:45:28I know that sultry sound.
00:45:29You tell darling Nikki I said hello.
00:45:32Okay, listen, I'm getting ready to cash a nice big bonus,
00:45:35which means I'm going to take a little vacay next week.
00:45:37When I get back, I want to get this new show in development,
00:45:40which means I'm looking for younger anchors who really know their stuff
00:45:43but got the looks to lasso the ladies.
00:45:46I'm your guy.
00:45:47Easy, stallion.
00:45:48I got to kick the tires first, okay?
00:45:50Make sure you and I are simpatico.
00:45:52So, uh...
00:45:53How about a night out on the town?
00:45:55Fine by me.
00:45:56Let me take you out.
00:45:57I'll pick the place.
00:45:58Done.
00:45:59And Reynolds, make it good.
00:46:03So, how'd that go, my sportscaster man?
00:46:07You know, baby, for the first time in my life,
00:46:10everything's fallen into place.
00:46:14Anyone with half a brain would have figured out something was fishy,
00:46:17but not me.
00:46:18Oh, perfect timing.
00:46:22He took the bait.
00:46:24The phone was officially in control.
00:46:26Whoa.
00:46:27Always a pleasure doing business for you fine folks.
00:46:30Double D,
00:46:31when you arrive here with that mother...
00:46:33and his friends, bring him to VIP.
00:46:37Brett Reynolds has no idea the kind of pain he's about to feel.
00:46:44Ouch.
00:46:45There was no coming back from this one as game six comes to a close.
00:46:48Could you imagine at the start of these finals that it would go to game seven,
00:46:52and that tonight the Saint would have by far his worst performance made even worse by challenging the coach on the sidelines?
00:46:59What we are watching here tonight, ladies and gentlemen, are the sins of the saint.
00:47:04Woo, I smell a meltdown.
00:47:06We'll take care of this guy tonight and get you back on track for game seven.
00:47:10Scar, I could give two f***s and a slice of cheese about the finals right now.
00:47:17All I care about is taking down Brett Reynolds.
00:47:21Brett Reynolds?
00:47:24Nikki, hey, what are you doing here?
00:47:27Well, I was worried about you, and I have a charity at stake.
00:47:31How do you know Brett?
00:47:37Rayman, Rayman, do I play my cards right?
00:47:41Rayman, I call you, I'm answer.
00:47:45Brett R plus two VIP.
00:47:47Brett!
00:47:48Me, Jules!
00:47:50Excuse me, excuse me.
00:47:52How the hell are you guys at Ticketton?
00:47:55Miss, get back in line.
00:47:56Chili's my boyfriend.
00:47:57Boyfriend?
00:47:58We never had to talk.
00:48:00I've never seen her before in my life.
00:48:02Miss, this is VIP only.
00:48:03They're not fit.
00:48:04They're on my list, and you most definitely are not.
00:48:06Now get back in line, or I'm gonna get ugly.
00:48:11Boom!
00:48:12Oh, no.
00:48:14Do I play my cards right?
00:48:18Baby.
00:48:19Seen her dancing in the middle of the floor.
00:48:31Body moving, we let the music take control.
00:48:34Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh.
00:48:44Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh.
00:48:48Hey, don't stop.
00:48:50Let's go.
00:48:51Body rock.
00:48:52Hand roll.
00:48:53Hand just moves.
00:48:54Control.
00:48:54Credit card.
00:48:58Click it on the Saints tab.
00:49:00Text them to confirm.
00:49:04What?
00:49:06Dude, he just broke gold phone rule number three.
00:49:08Yeah, it's like $500 a bottle.
00:49:09That's like full-on theory, bro.
00:49:11Guys, the Saint is a total dirtbag and a rich one.
00:49:13He can afford it.
00:49:14That's not the point.
00:49:15Well, now's not the time to discuss.
00:49:17Guys, Vance is my ticket in.
00:49:19I'm trying to get a job here.
00:49:20So if you get on board with that,
00:49:21or you go f*** yourselves.
00:49:23Go f*** ourselves.
00:49:24Yeah, that's right.
00:49:24Do you really think I would be here if I could do that?
00:49:27Wow, the Saint's not the only one
00:49:28who turned up to be a real douchebag.
00:49:30Oh, this coming from the guy
00:49:31who turned this phone into his own private brothel.
00:49:33That means a lot.
00:49:34All right, we're having an intervention.
00:49:35Hand over the phone, Mr. Hyde.
00:49:37Don't even think about it.
00:49:37Yeah, give him the f***
00:49:38before your douchebag transformation is complete.
00:49:41Hey, hey, hey, hey.
00:49:42Everything copacetic there?
00:49:43Yeah, yeah, yeah.
00:49:44We're all just insisting to pick up the check.
00:49:48Well, well, well.
00:49:49Look who's arrived.
00:49:50Darling Nikki, how are you?
00:49:52Good, hi.
00:49:53You look wonderful.
00:49:54Hey, hey, hey.
00:49:55Sorry about the game.
00:49:56Oh, it's amazing how quickly things just fall apart, isn't it?
00:50:02Nikki, I like you a lot.
00:50:05In fact, sometimes guys do stupid things
00:50:08because we like someone so much.
00:50:09Oh, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.
00:50:11You don't have to make excuses for all my old boyfriends.
00:50:14You are so much better than all of them combined.
00:50:17Oh, another text.
00:50:20You are just so popular.
00:50:24Are you going to answer it?
00:50:25I'll check it later.
00:50:26Oh, no, no, no.
00:50:27I insist.
00:50:28It can wait.
00:50:29I need to tell you something.
00:50:30Check it.
00:50:36Uh, Brett.
00:50:37Not now, G.
00:50:39Hey, Brett.
00:50:40I said not now.
00:50:41Oh, I think he knows.
00:50:44Brett Reynolds.
00:50:46Let's rap.
00:50:52You actually thought that you could use my old number
00:50:56and pretend to be me for your own personal game.
00:51:00You're a moron.
00:51:03Scott, read him the tally.
00:51:06Oz, two Gs.
00:51:07York House gratis bag, 11 Gs.
00:51:09Multiple shopping excursions, 17 Gs.
00:51:12Bentley rental, 40 Gs.
00:51:14Tribeca penthouse for six months, 80 Gs
00:51:17for a total of $150,000.
00:51:20That's some serious bank, man.
00:51:23Okay, hold on.
00:51:24Look, I may have bent the truth a bit
00:51:29pretending to know you,
00:51:30but all of this stuff was offered for free.
00:51:33For me, not for some loser
00:51:35and his two f***ing stooges.
00:51:38Game's over, Reynolds.
00:51:40If I were you, I'd get good at flipping burgers.
00:51:44Now, Vance, come on.
00:51:45I can explain.
00:51:46Who are you?
00:51:49Nikki, I...
00:51:50Wait, Nikki.
00:51:53I want to give you the million-dollar check.
00:51:55Win or lose.
00:51:56How about we, uh, meet before the gate?
00:51:59In private?
00:52:00Yeah.
00:52:00Uh, my dad's office.
00:52:03Seven o'clock.
00:52:04Perfect.
00:52:05See you there.
00:52:06You know what?
00:52:07You really are a saint.
00:52:09Oh, you have got to be kidding me.
00:52:11This guy is a total dog.
00:52:13I can prove it.
00:52:14You want to see some of the text messages
00:52:16that come into his phone?
00:52:17Don't you mean your phone?
00:52:18You are the only girl in my life.
00:52:20I promise you know everything now.
00:52:23Brett!
00:52:23Brett!
00:52:24I saw you come in here.
00:52:25Who are you?
00:52:26I'm Jewel.
00:52:27She's girlfriend.
00:52:28Who are you?
00:52:29I am so out of here!
00:52:31She isn't!
00:52:32She is not my girlfriend!
00:52:33You are such a loser!
00:52:36Ugh.
00:52:37So you guys aren't fit, are you?
00:52:40Thought so.
00:52:41Totally a fan.
00:52:43You know how I got my name, Brett?
00:52:54I have divine powers.
00:52:57I'm a walking miracle.
00:52:59I was meant to be worshipped.
00:53:01Get rid of that number.
00:53:03Tomorrow.
00:53:05Or next time, you won't be able to tell
00:53:07which of your friends are which.
00:53:08That's messed up.
00:53:10Because I'm white and he's black.
00:53:11Yeah, boy wonder.
00:53:13We got it.
00:53:14Oh.
00:53:16Just so you know,
00:53:18I'm gonna win game seven tomorrow.
00:53:21Right after I bang out your little girlfriend,
00:53:23Miss Paige.
00:53:26On her daddy's desk.
00:53:30I haven't been this beat up
00:53:31since my Aunt Fifi's bridal shower.
00:53:33Guys, I'm gonna make this right.
00:53:34The ride's over, Brett.
00:53:36Yeah, you're on your own, pal.
00:53:37Now, fellas.
00:53:38Come on!
00:53:41If we're going under, got my scuba kit
00:53:49And I got one for you in case we take a dip
00:53:52Now, I ain't really good a swimmer
00:53:53But I heard you were
00:53:54So you can help me out as we sail about
00:53:57And with every kiss we share, I give you my breath
00:54:00So no matter how deep, you gon' have some left peace out
00:54:04See you later, world
00:54:05Well, you screwed up good this time
00:54:09I don't know what to do, Ma
00:54:10Honey, I love you
00:54:12But it's time that you became a man
00:54:14Figure it out
00:54:16And don't come home until you do
00:54:17Ma
00:54:19When all we have is far from love
00:54:24Oh, you just gotta take my hand
00:54:27Cause if we're going down, we're going down together
00:54:30Na-na-na-na-na-na
00:54:33Na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na
00:54:34Na-na-na-na-na-na-na
00:54:38Cause if we're going down, we're going down together
00:54:41No
00:54:47What's that?
00:54:52No!
00:54:53You lost the stink
00:54:56Stay away from me
00:54:58Come on, Stallone
00:54:59the lord giveth and the lord taketh and apparently he indian giveth too
00:55:05because the stink was back and in a bad way
00:55:15damn phone henry it's ruined everything my is stuck and i don't know how to fix it
00:55:21about the dog to ameliorize the soul
00:55:28oh so tell me henry what do i do with this phone now
00:55:33ah for this save a simple solution following your instincts will not do but shadows always
00:55:39understand what shadows may but i don't what are you talking about hey listen to the whispers of
00:55:46the grass it shall lead the way the whispers of the grass come on man are you kidding me
00:55:53i am lost here i need some help what do you want from me kid whoa henry your accent look
00:56:01kid it's actually henry okay henry sosnowitz from the bronx the bronx yeah the bronx let me give you
00:56:09the straight poop everybody lies to get an edge up this whole french bit was my wife's idea when i
00:56:15first staked out this park some 10 odd years ago there was five other cards we was all fighting
00:56:21for our lives so i had to come up with something to differentiate seemed like a good enough idea
00:56:27and it began to work so i ran with it wow i feel like i just saw santa claus banging the tooth fairy
00:56:35sorry to disappoint you but hey i still make a mean dog no and at the end of the day
00:56:43that's what really counts yeah yeah so um by the way a little short on scratch today is it all right
00:56:52if i just paint what i look like meals on wheels get the out of here
00:56:59hey hey good some advice from the bronx when your stuck call a plumber
00:57:05i see a call from the old digits that mean you're alive barely hold on i'm in a conference in g
00:57:36bready boy you still breathing i got pazzy on the line too what up g has man look fellas i totally
00:57:44understand if you're done with me but i need your help right now more than ever if you choose to tell
00:57:49me to off i get it but i am down on my knees boys you know that's right i think we all can agree that
00:57:55nobody here is blameless yeah because you may have been the monster but g and i frankenstein that
00:58:01oh you guys rock so i suppose you want us to help stop the saint from banging nikki tonight
00:58:06that's kind of a top priority well we're here to help good paz i need you to go to my mom's place
00:58:10get me a change of clothes you got it bro oh and my old flip phone i have an idea but first we need
00:58:16to stall the sink and how do you propose to do that call a plumber the mob may kill you but the bcm can
00:58:23make your life miserable white front to back i'll catch you later
00:58:28yo joey v it's paz bro paz i hate to hit you up like this but but bready and me we're in a bind
00:58:37listen let me make a couple of phone calls i'll take care of this no problembo
00:58:41yeah yeah i know those guys yeah paz man introduced me to the appletini that guy cracks me up
00:58:49yeah yeah i got a key to the back gate no problem i'll spread the word i'll meet you there yeah yeah
00:58:54i know where he lives sure i know his driver yeah i'm happy to help what do you need
00:59:01tell paz you can count me in yeah i can get him into the game
00:59:04damn it tell him to go to the north entrance yeah i'll hook him up with the av guy north entrance
00:59:14joey that's awesome yeah me and paz owe you a night at papa moochies you the man
00:59:19all right gentlemen one more call and it's game time
00:59:23i gotta meet with the boss's daughter cause i'm the same baby
00:59:40then you go get it all this baby
00:59:46let the storm begin
00:59:48i know you like it when it's dirty baby like it's dirty baby
01:00:11and now for the coupe de grass
01:00:18uh
01:00:42whoa what are you doing back it up no one's going through here
01:00:45I said back it up!
01:00:47Come on, Jeezy. Back your a** up.
01:00:49Ronnie fixed your old phone and texted you the files.
01:00:52No problem. Everything else is set up.
01:00:54Come on, come on. Time is wasting. Let's do it.
01:00:57What took you so long?
01:00:59We stalled the saint long enough to implement a strategy
01:01:01where we could lure Nicky away.
01:01:03Places, everyone.
01:01:15Classic bait and switch.
01:01:21So how do you know the saint?
01:01:23I don't.
01:01:25My loser ex got into trouble with him,
01:01:28so he was forced to call me
01:01:30and arrange for the saint and I to meet up.
01:01:33Sounds about right.
01:01:35I was instructed to tell you to keep the lights out
01:01:38and to wait beneath the desk.
01:01:40Don't chit-chat.
01:01:42Just get down to business.
01:01:44Oh.
01:01:45Oh, and, uh,
01:01:47he might use another girl's name.
01:01:49Just so you know.
01:01:51Whatever he wants.
01:01:54Saint raced up to Phil Page's office
01:01:58and changed into one of his little kinky get-ups.
01:02:14Conference room screen now!
01:02:19Nicky?
01:02:20Mm-hmm?
01:02:21Oh, you bad girl.
01:02:23You knew just what it was gonna take to get this million dollars, didn't you?
01:02:29Uh-huh.
01:02:30Uh-huh.
01:02:31Uh-huh.
01:02:32Uh-huh.
01:02:33Uh-huh.
01:02:34Gotta hurry up, though.
01:02:35Big Daddy got a game here.
01:02:36Put that on right there.
01:02:37Uh-huh.
01:02:38Uh-huh.
01:02:39Uh-huh.
01:02:40Uh-huh.
01:02:41Oh, yeah.
01:02:42Oh, yes.
01:02:43Yes!
01:02:44Yes!
01:02:45Uh-huh.
01:02:46Uh-huh.
01:02:47This is a million dollar block I'm making.
01:02:49It's worth, uh, for everybody!
01:02:52Uhhh!
01:02:53I'm fine.
01:02:58Same.
01:03:01Now that's a money shot.
01:03:06Who the hell are you?
01:03:08I'm real.
01:03:10I'm girls.
01:03:12Riddles, I'm gonna kill you!
01:03:15Elevator decoy, now!
01:03:19What the is happening today?
01:03:23Get out of here!
01:03:34You can keep your money, you creep!
01:03:36No, no, no, no, no!
01:03:39Oh, shit!
01:03:40Yes!
01:03:41Oh!
01:03:42Oh!
01:03:43Oh!
01:03:44Oh!
01:03:45Oh!
01:03:46Shh!
01:03:47Shh!
01:03:48Square!
01:03:49What happened?
01:03:50Trapped where?
01:03:5445.
01:03:55Got it!
01:03:56Hey!
01:03:57Here you go.
01:03:58Just text the number I gave you.
01:03:59It should work.
01:04:00You guys pull this off.
01:04:01I'm buying.
01:04:02Thanks, Ronnie.
01:04:03Where'd you get the microphone?
01:04:04I don't want to hear that!
01:04:05Hello!
01:04:06Hello!
01:04:07Ah!
01:04:08Hello?
01:04:09What?
01:04:10For the win?
01:04:11Ah!
01:04:12Ah!
01:04:13Ah!
01:04:14Ah!
01:04:15Ah!
01:04:16Ah!
01:04:17Ah!
01:04:18Ah!
01:04:19Ah!
01:04:20Ah!
01:04:21Ah!
01:04:22Ah!
01:04:23Ah!
01:04:24Ah!
01:04:25Ah!
01:04:26Ah!
01:04:27Ah!
01:04:28Hi, baby.
01:04:29Hi, this is Lucy.
01:04:30Hi, I'm Jules.
01:04:31Do you happen to have our breath myth by any chance?
01:04:35What?
01:04:36Stop it!
01:04:37Don't cry!
01:04:38Gianna, we'll talk about this later, okay?
01:04:40No, I'm not excited.
01:04:41What's the game we're going to?
01:04:42Wait, are you silent?
01:04:43Sorry, ladies.
01:04:44Only players beyond this point at game time.
01:04:51That player is my husband for five more minutes.
01:04:58Hello, sweetheart.
01:05:00Hi.
01:05:05What's the matter?
01:05:07Uh, just some boy troubles, Daddy.
01:05:12Hey.
01:05:13Yeah.
01:05:14You want to punch it out?
01:05:16No.
01:05:17Come on, I always used to work.
01:05:19Afraid you can't take me anymore?
01:05:22Come on.
01:05:23Come on.
01:05:24All right, all right, all right.
01:05:26Oh, it's that bad, huh?
01:05:33You want to talk about it?
01:05:38Why is it that every guy is a lying jerk?
01:05:41Let me have it.
01:05:42Come on.
01:05:43I love you, sweetie.
01:05:44I love you, Dad.
01:05:45It all comes down to this.
01:05:48Ladies and gentlemen, I'm Brent Reynolds, and welcome to Game 7 between the New York Nights and Philadelphia Fountain.
01:06:07Oh, shit.
01:06:08Oh, whoa, whoa, whoa.
01:06:09Get your ears off.
01:06:10I'm gonna kill you.
01:06:11I'd like to take a moment to tell the crowd here tonight, and all of the viewers watching at home, I'm a liar.
01:06:24And I just majorly screwed up with the girl of my dreams.
01:06:29Tyrone, get that guy off my court.
01:06:32Daddy, Daddy, please, please, just stop.
01:06:34Just, just let him talk.
01:06:36Is that the guy?
01:06:38Nikki Page. It's true.
01:06:41I only met you because I inadvertently
01:06:44got the Saint's old phone number.
01:06:47I'm gonna kill him!
01:06:50You wanna know why nothing worked today, Saint?
01:06:53Well, now you know.
01:06:54Unless you want a problem with every electrician, plumber,
01:06:57and limo driver in the tri-state area,
01:06:59you're not going nowhere.
01:07:01It all started when my ex, Jules Schachter,
01:07:04dumped me and started texting me pictures like...
01:07:08this.
01:07:10Oh!
01:07:12Oh. My. God!
01:07:14And... this one.
01:07:17Yes!
01:07:20Thank you. Thank you.
01:07:22That's me. That's me. That's me. That's me.
01:07:25Yeah. Yes.
01:07:26She is an awful human being.
01:07:29So I changed my number.
01:07:31And then I realized I had the Saint's old digits,
01:07:34and when the offers started coming in,
01:07:38well, I...
01:07:40I couldn't say no.
01:07:41So, yes, it's true.
01:07:42I lied about being rich.
01:07:43I'm actually...
01:07:45flat broke.
01:07:48I know. I know.
01:07:49I don't blame you.
01:07:51As a result,
01:07:53I betrayed the trust of a woman
01:07:56who I care deeply about.
01:07:59You'll hear from my lawyer.
01:08:02Jonah!
01:08:03Jonah!
01:08:04Mi amore!
01:08:05Okay, everybody, everybody, calm down.
01:08:08Everybody...
01:08:09Okay, everybody, wait.
01:08:11Wait, wait, wait, wait.
01:08:12I have another picture that I can show.
01:08:14All I had to do was hit send,
01:08:16and the picture of Saint and Jules
01:08:17would be splashed all over the world.
01:08:19And as I looked at the fear in the Saint's eyes,
01:08:22I couldn't help but feel that this phone
01:08:25somehow connected us.
01:08:27We both understood its power.
01:08:29And with great power comes a lot of free shit.
01:08:35Oh!
01:08:36I'm sorry, sweetheart.
01:08:41All right, all right, all right.
01:08:45Nicky!
01:08:47Nicky!
01:08:48New York City!
01:08:52That is enough!
01:08:54This man is putting everything on the line here.
01:08:58The least we can do is hear him out.
01:09:02Officers.
01:09:03Anything for you, Saint.
01:09:06Thanks, Saint.
01:09:09What I'm trying to say is
01:09:11I'm sorry
01:09:12to everyone that I've knowingly
01:09:14or unknowingly hurt.
01:09:17I will earn back your trust.
01:09:20I'm gonna make up for my mistakes,
01:09:21and I will pay everybody back in full.
01:09:25Even if it means I have to live with my mom
01:09:27until I'm 40.
01:09:29I live with my mom.
01:09:32And Nicky,
01:09:34I just want you to know
01:09:35I am falling in love with you.
01:09:40That was the truce.
01:09:42I'm kinda tied up at the moment.
01:09:44Yeah, don't worry about it.
01:09:45Look, somebody's here for you.
01:09:46Look, somebody's here for you.
01:09:53Yeah!
01:09:54Yeah!
01:09:55Yeah!
01:09:56Yeah!
01:09:57Yeah!
01:09:58New York City!
01:09:59Yeah!
01:10:01Yeah!
01:10:03Yeah!
01:10:04Yeah!
01:10:05Finally.
01:10:06And I would bounce.
01:10:10Oh!
01:10:11Yes!
01:10:12Yes!
01:10:13You're finally a man, Brett!
01:10:15And that girl has a sweet rack.
01:10:17You did good.
01:10:19We should talk.
01:10:20You could have destroyed me out there. Why didn't you?
01:10:32You're my hero growing up.
01:10:34Well, too bad I'm not that guy, right?
01:10:36Well, not yet.
01:10:38But I want to become the person that I was pretending to be.
01:10:43Maybe you should try that, too.
01:10:44You want to be a sportscaster, right?
01:10:46Yeah.
01:10:47Like that'll ever happen now.
01:10:49I'll tell you what.
01:10:50After I win this here game,
01:10:52I'll do my first sit-down interview with you.
01:10:54Deal?
01:10:55Uh, yeah!
01:10:57Deal!
01:10:59All right, all right, all right, all right.
01:11:00Game time.
01:11:01Yeah, hey, good luck tonight.
01:11:03Luck?
01:11:04Not necessary.
01:11:05Thanks to you.
01:11:07Just to pick me up, I need it right there.
01:11:09Yeah, you know.
01:11:10You know.
01:11:13They need a hero
01:11:14To save this game
01:11:15From all these actors and ladies
01:11:16No, I ain't naming names
01:11:18And that pretty much brings us full circle.
01:11:20The video of me at game seven went viral.
01:11:23The saint granted his first tell-all interview.
01:11:26And here I am now as your co-anchor.
01:11:29Fascinating.
01:11:30Brett Reynolds, folks.
01:11:31One man's journey
01:11:32From stink
01:11:33To fink
01:11:34To in the pink
01:11:36Speaking of
01:11:37Bet that ex-girlfriend of yours
01:11:38Is kicking herself right about now, huh?
01:11:40Well, as a matter of fact
01:11:41She keeps calling me.
01:11:42I'm gonna have to get myself a new number.
01:11:45Oh, zowie.
01:11:47You heard it here first, folks.
01:11:49And Jules,
01:11:50I'm not doing anything Friday night.
01:11:51No, no, no.
01:11:52Come on.
01:11:53Just kidding.
01:11:54I'm also available Saturday.
01:11:57And until tomorrow,
01:11:58I'm Gus Jacobson.
01:11:59And I'm Brett Reynolds.
01:12:00We'll see you tomorrow on Sports Huddle.
01:12:03You know, you smell better in Vance, too.
01:12:06Heroes make the sunrise in the morning.
01:12:09Heroes make the moon shine bright at night.
01:12:12Clean slate.
01:12:13Bye-bye, Jules.
01:12:14Forever.
01:12:15Yeah, it's convenient.
01:12:16She wants you back now that you're famous.
01:12:17Well, I doubt that's gonna happen.
01:12:18Wow, I think it's official, Breddie Boy.
01:12:19You have lost the stink.
01:12:20Yeah, it's convenient. She wants you back now that you're famous.
01:12:23Well, I doubt that's gonna happen.
01:12:25Wow, I think it's official, bready boy.
01:12:27You have lost the stink.
01:12:32Get a room. Let's go.
01:12:38So, what are the new digits, bro?
01:12:40Yeah, what's the lucky number?
01:12:43Huh. I haven't given this out to anyone yet.
01:12:50New York City, man.
01:12:57New York City, man.
01:13:03In the year 2002, I was caught swimming around.
01:13:08And there she was standing, man.
01:13:10And I finally found my home.
01:13:12New York City, man.
01:13:17New York City, man.
01:13:20Here we go.
01:13:21Ha!
01:13:25Just a shocking, shocking game five.
01:13:27True that.
01:13:28All hats and no cattle.
01:13:29Don't pee on my leg and tell me it's raining.
01:13:31Bricks all over the place.
01:13:32Whoo! One just came through the window.
01:13:34Duck!
01:13:36Baby, come on, Mark.
01:13:37It's a dumpling nest.
01:13:38You having trouble there?
01:13:40You all right?
01:13:41Need help?
01:13:44Oh, Mc...
01:13:45You good?
01:13:46Take a shower.
01:13:48And I'll be waiting for you.
01:13:52My pool.
01:13:54New.
01:13:55Well, if she waiting for me, I'm out of here.
01:13:58That was some divine intervention from the saint right there.
01:14:01And then the immortal words of Jay-Z.
01:14:03That shit cray.
01:14:04You actually thought that you could use my old number and did the blah-blah-blah-blah-blah-blah-blah.
01:14:10Whoo! I smell a meltdown.
01:14:13She doesn't sweat much for a fat girl.
01:14:19Soft sticks, Mark.
01:14:20Next time, you give me the regular sticks, all right?
01:14:26And action.
01:14:27I will give you some hands.
01:14:28Give you some hands from the boy's daughter.
01:14:31Got Nicki in by a bang.
01:14:32Whoo!
01:14:33It's gonna get over-spangled.
01:14:34Over-spangled.
01:14:35Whoo!
01:14:37Is he the one that went off the script?
01:14:38Yeah.
01:14:39Did he get...
01:14:40I'm trying to stay on script.
01:14:41He went off the script?
01:14:42He's a veer.
01:14:43I'm gonna kill both of you.
01:14:44You know that?
01:14:45Both of you.
01:14:46How is this?
01:14:47Look!
01:14:48Ha!
01:14:49Can we bring their...
01:14:50Where's their f***ing room?
01:14:52I wanna know, too.
01:14:53You ain't going nowhere.
01:14:55Hey, I got low...
01:14:56Low Joe Pesci.
01:14:57You ain't going nowhere.
01:14:59I got the little pizza delivery boy coming at me like that, man.
01:15:02You ain't going nowhere.
01:15:03I'm f***ing your little Frankie Bowne ass.
01:15:05You ain't going nowhere.
01:15:06Let him speak!
01:15:07Oh, yeah.
01:15:09What's wrong with you?
01:15:14Action.
01:15:15How do you know Brett?
01:15:16I used to sell them pot.
01:15:18I used to sell them pot.
01:15:21Fight!
01:15:22God!
01:15:24God!
01:15:33Buying cigarettes for the kids on the block.
01:15:35I know they're underage, but I came here to rock.
01:15:38I say what I think, and they think that's a crime.
01:15:41But you can't cuff my mind.
01:15:43What if I flip the old bar.
01:15:44It's right here.
01:15:46Turn the port grow up.
01:15:47I charge it a little area.
01:15:48Most of the time.
01:15:49Oh no.
01:15:50And the przинки over here.
01:15:51Like, I know.
01:15:52That was why I'm cutting off my wrist.
01:15:53We need toå“¡'s right!
01:15:54I have to stay with my parents.
01:15:55And then I see that.
01:15:56Guys, in our dead house,oting a little21,
01:15:57Take me out.
01:15:58Sure we're running...
01:15:59Anything!
01:16:00And now we're running for you.
01:16:01I can't 很去了.
01:16:02I've beenicking any more.
01:16:03Did you check?
01:16:04Not really well?
01:16:05It's my � cuerpo.
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