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What happens when a modern Navy SEAL is thrown into the Roman Colosseum to face ancient gladiators? In this episode of Two Brain Cells, we drop a 21st-century special forces soldier—armed with an M4 rifle, combat knife, and tactical gear—into the heart of ancient Rome.

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Transcript
00:00180 AD, 50,000 screaming spectators pack the Roman Colosseum. Gladiators spill blood on the sand,
00:08lions tear into prisoners. Emperor Commodus himself prepares to join. It's the greatest
00:13spectacle in the ancient world. But let's change one thing. In the tunnels beneath the arena floor
00:19is something no one has ever seen. A modern Navy SEAL fire team dropped into a battle they were
00:25never trained for. So what happens when the most advanced special operations team on earth is
00:31unleashed during one of history's most brutal blood sports? Can they survive wave after wave of
00:36gladiators, wild beasts, and the emperor's guard? Or is it just one team against an empire?
00:43First, let's look at what exactly we just dropped into the first century. A modern SEAL fire team
00:49is composed of four operators trained to perfection in every form of violence known to science.
00:55They can run a mile and a half in under 10 minutes while carrying 40 kilograms or almost 90 pounds of
01:01gear, shoot a penny from 300 meters away, and coordinate attacks using encrypted radios.
01:07And keep in mind, radio equals telepathy to Romans watching 16 centuries before Benjamin Franklin would
01:13fly his kite. Each SEAL carries an M4A1 carbine, a selective fire rifle that shoots up to 950
01:205.56mm rounds per minute on full auto. One SEAL gets a fully automatic MK48 machine gun that carries
01:27100 7.62mm NATO rounds in a single mag. Each one also carries a 9mm sidearm for when things get too
01:36close for comfort, plus combat knives, two to three fragmentation grenades, and one gets a 40mm
01:42grenade launcher attached to his rifle. All of this is packaged behind modern ballistic vests with
01:48ceramic trauma plates designed to stop bullets traveling three times the speed of sound. Even
01:53their helmets are Kevlar strong enough to stop a bullet. They've got night vision goggles, tactical
01:57gloves, eye protection, and boots, plus tourniquets, bandages, and enough morphine to walk off a grenade
02:03blast. Against them stands the pride of Rome's killing floor, professional gladiators who've turned
02:09stabbing into an art form. Mormilos with massive shields and short swords. Retiari dancing with
02:17nets and tridents. Thracians with curved swords designed to get around shields and into organs.
02:24They aren't just criminals forced to fight. Many are trained killers who've survived dozens of these
02:29battles. Dawn breaks as the SEAL team emerges onto the sand. First is a warm-up, a Venatio, or beast hunt.
02:37Two starved African lions are released, expecting to feast on lightly armed humans.
02:43The crowd goes wild as the SEALs spread into a defensive semi-circle, rifles up. The first
02:49lion charges, and at 30 meters, a SEAL squeezes his trigger twice, dropping the lion mid-leap.
02:54The second lion hesitates. It just witnessed the very first gunshot nine centuries too soon.
03:00Another SEAL steps forward and puts three rounds in center mass, turning the king of beasts into a rug.
03:05The SEALs expended five rounds and walked away without breaking a sweat. The crowd falls silent.
03:12Spectators wonder if the SEALs are gods. Others suspect witchcraft. Commodus watches,
03:17annoyed. Strangers have just trivialized his favorite blood sport.
03:22For midday entertainment, ten condemned criminals are pushed into the arena. They're given swords,
03:27clubs, and a few shields, and promised freedom if they kill the outsiders. It's a lie, but desperate men
03:32will believe anything. The convicts fan out to surround the SEALs, who fall into a tight back-to-back
03:38circle, each covering a 90-degree arc. This is called a defensive perimeter, and the arena is about
03:45to be called a kill box. The attackers close in, and at 20 meters, the SEALs open semi-automatic fire,
03:52intentionally placing each shot to conserve ammo. The lead convict raises his sword to charge,
03:57but a bullet punches through his chest before he even takes a step. Two more rush forward and face
04:02the same fate. Within ten seconds, half the attackers are eliminated, and the survivors freeze.
04:08One SEAL gestures with his rifle. He shouts in English, but the tone is universal. Drop your
04:13weapons. Three convicts immediately throw down their swords and retreat. The rest, driven by
04:19desperation, make a final charge. The SEAL team expects this. They've already switched to full auto,
04:24and end the assault before it closes half the distance. Roughly 30 rounds total have been
04:30expended. The SEAL team is uninjured. Professional gladiators enter the arena next,
04:36real killers who've dedicated their lives to close combat. The first wave is a heavily armored
04:42mermilo and a nimble Rotarius working as a team. The Rotarius casts a net while his partner charges.
04:48At 40 meters, the Rotarius, wearing nothing but a loincloth, takes two rounds to the chest and drops
04:55instantly. The mermilo's large shield actually deflects the first shot, surprising everyone
05:00including the SEAL who fired it, so the SEAL switches to full auto and switches a line from the
05:05gladiator's legs to his head. The man crashes in the sand, ten meters away. Another four gladiators
05:12and an archer enter immediately. The SEALs prioritize the ranged threat first, and a 5-5-6 round
05:18hits the bowman square in the chest before he draws back his first arrow. The remaining four
05:23charge from multiple angles, hoping to surround the super soldiers. A SEAL pulls the pin on a
05:28fragmentation grenade and lobs it into the two gladiators approaching from his left. Sand
05:33fountains into the air as two gladiators cease to exist. Spectators in the front rows are pelted with
05:39debris. The surviving two gladiators stumble, ears ringing, and a SEAL drops one with a quick burst.
05:45Amidst the chaos, another manages to get close enough to slash at a SEAL's arm, but the blade
05:50skitters off reinforced fabric, leaving barely a scratch before he's dropped as well.
05:55The final wave sees two champions, including a provocateur in full armor who uses cover
06:00and advances in zigzags, trying to be smart. Accounting for the heavy armor, a SEAL fires a
06:0640mm grenade from an underbarrel launcher that gets the SEALs one step closer to winning.
06:11Meanwhile, the last champion actually reaches the SEALs in a desperate charge and manages
06:16to thrust his sword at his unarmored leg. The SEAL rifle butts him in the face while his
06:21teammate double taps the gladiator from the side. One SEAL has an open wound on his calf.
06:27It's painful but manageable after field dressing. The SEAL team is out 100 rounds and two grenades.
06:33Still plenty left, but they're starting to feel the heat, and 90 pounds of gear isn't getting any
06:37easier to carry. Commodus orders a full military spectacle. 20 infantry in formation, two war
06:45chariots with archers and cavalry. The SEALs fall back for cover and prepare for war as the gates open.
06:52The enemy advances in a pincer movement, but the SEAL team has already acted, and two fragmentation
06:57grenades are in their tight formation. Twin explosions scythe through the ranks, and 12 men are down
07:02instantly. Limbs are scattered across the arena. The SEALs switch to rapid fire, dropping soldiers
07:08as fast as they can. A chariot thunders in, and the archer manages to put an arrow into a SEAL's
07:13shoulder joint, one of the few gaps in their armor. It's the first serious wound. The injured SEAL
07:19switches to one-handed shooting while his team concentrates fire on the chariot. The horses go down
07:24and bring the chariot with them. The second chariot meets the same fate. When the smoke clears,
07:29the SEALs are the only ones standing, but they're hurting, and everyone's exhausted. By this point,
07:35the SEAL team is down to about 60 rounds each. Sensing their weakness, Emperor Commodus himself
07:41enters the arena accompanied by 10 Praetorian guards. The crowd holds its breath. The SEALs each
07:48have one rifle magazine and a couple of pistol mags. Without hesitation, they form up one last time,
07:54back-to-back, ready to go down swinging. Commodus taunts them in Latin, attempting to make their fall
08:00a spectacle, and the SEAL responds with a burst of automatic fire. Two Praetorians absorb the bullets
08:06meant for their Emperor. One round grazes Commodus' arm, and the crowd gasps. Commodus screams at his
08:13guards, who launch their heavy javelins. One catches a SEAL on the thigh, knocking him to the sand. The SEALs
08:20empty the last of their magazines point-blank into the charging guards before switching to pistol fire.
08:26Commodus himself moves in for the kill on the downed operator, but another SEAL puts a 9mm round
08:31into the Emperor's chest. His Empyreal armor gets a clear hole punched through it, and Commodus staggers.
08:39The wounded SEAL yanks out his combat knife and drives it into Commodus' throat in a gap between
08:44his armor. The Emperor of Rome dies gurgling on American steel. The remaining guards freeze,
08:51and the SEALs eliminate them in the confusion. When the dust settles, the Navy SEALs would stand
08:57victorious in the Colosseum, having handled the best Rome had to offer. Or what do you think would
09:03happen? And if you're curious about what would happen if a modern submarine fought the Spanish Armada,
09:09check out this video.
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