- 18 hours ago
- #realitytvdeep
A View from the Terrace Season 8 Episode 1
#RealityTVDeep
#RealityTVDeep
Category
🎥
Short filmTranscript
00:01The greatest show on earth is about to begin.
00:07That is outrageous!
00:09And it goes!
00:21Oh dear, oh dear.
00:30That's a howler!
00:41Is this what Scottish football is about?
00:43Delicious!
00:44Oh, worse!
00:50Champions!
00:52This has been an absolute barnstormer!
01:00Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls, children of all ages,
01:05it is my pleasure to welcome you for the very first time this season
01:09to A View from the Terrace.
01:11It's a brand new campaign, it's a brand new studio
01:14and it's a brand new haircut, but my name is still Craig Gordon Telfer
01:18and I am still here ranking, rating and reviewing
01:21every single atom of Scottish football,
01:24from the superstars at the very top all the way through the pyramid.
01:28It's a very big job, but helping me out are two very big boys.
01:33Up first, it's a man who was once described online as a swagless oath
01:37and what would happen to a hairy dog tangled in a fence
01:40if it was given human life for 24 hours?
01:43It's Craig Fowler.
01:45Ah, just the two insults to kick us off.
01:47Plenty more where that came from.
01:49I know!
01:50And up next, this man has one of the most distinctive voices
01:53in sports broadcasting.
01:55Imagine Murray Walker and Jerry the King Lawler had a child
01:58and fed it nothing but cabbage and ribs.
02:01It's Tony Anderson.
02:02Hello mate, how are we doing?
02:03Oh, I'm very well and it's great to get the opportunity
02:06to kick off this show with you both.
02:08How are you doing? Fowler, how's things been?
02:10Aye, tremendous, had an excellent summer.
02:12Went to South America for three weeks and then I came back
02:15and for the first time in over a decade I got a season ticket
02:18and what a time to get it because my team are flying.
02:21Three weeks in South America, was it?
02:23Yes, it was.
02:24Somebody is doing alright.
02:27And you, your team's doing no bad.
02:29Yes, Dennis Muir, I'm doing really, really well,
02:31but outside of that I just waited here for four months
02:34until we got the chance to...
02:36Did you build it up for us?
02:37Yeah, it's pretty much.
02:38I gave it a wee bit of finishing touch,
02:39polished some of the edge there, but it's looking good.
02:41And you know what?
02:42It's great to get the chance to spend the time with you.
02:44Three very insufferable people whose teams are doing well.
02:47Enjoy the show.
02:53Right, let's not muck around here lads.
02:55We are almost three months into the new season.
02:58So much has happened, there has been so much action
03:00and I would like to review everything that's happened
03:03in its binary form.
03:05Let's talk about the good and the bad,
03:06the winners and the losers from Scottish football
03:09so far this season.
03:10And it's more fun to talk about the losers,
03:12so let's go to the biggest losers of them all, Tony,
03:14Aberdeen Football Club.
03:16It is absolutely mind-bending,
03:18watching how Aberdeen's whole existence is playing out.
03:24I mean, now, going into last season and this season,
03:26we're now at five league wins in 32 games,
03:29but with this random anomaly of winning the Scottish Cup
03:32in the mixer.
03:33But the bad part of last season has bled into this season
03:37and we're now six games in.
03:39And I saw this graphic kicking about the other day
03:42and it's just a list of the scores, pretty self-explanatory.
03:45As you would imagine, after what I just said,
03:47none of them have scored.
03:48And that is the only bleeding point in getting on the park.
03:51Aberdeen's squad has scored more league goals for hearts this season
03:55than they have Aberdeen.
03:57What are we putting this down to?
03:59I think it must be some sort of satanic pact that was made last season
04:03that when they went to win the Scottish Cup,
04:05you will have the time of your life, but then after that,
04:07it will be completely joyless.
04:09It is mad because the attacking talent in that squad is brilliant
04:13and yet they're not scoring any goals
04:15and they're not even like a defensive team.
04:17It's not like a manager who's just sitting to draw every game 0-0
04:20and if you get a goal, all brilliant.
04:21They actually go out to try and attack teams.
04:23They just can't get the ball over the line.
04:24But that's the thing, if the attacking unit isn't working
04:27then neither is the defensive unit at the moment
04:29because you saw Dimitar Mitov, who was the hero
04:31of that Scottish Cup win over Celtic,
04:33saving penalties from Callum McGregor and Alistair Johnson.
04:35He makes an inexplicable error in that defeat to Motherwell on Saturday.
04:40That was like the most unbelievable and yet believable thing
04:43that when Aberdeen missed all these opportunities to score,
04:46you think, well, at the very least they'll leave with a point
04:48and then Johnny Katrumbus cutting inside,
04:51shooting away his weaker foot and meet off
04:54with the worst mistake he's made in Scottish football so far.
04:57It was just, again, like I say, unbelievable but believable.
05:00Aberdeen are a really proud club.
05:02They're very, and rightly so, very proud of their heritage
05:05and they should be delighted with that Scottish Cup win
05:07back in May over Celtic, but the more this goes on,
05:10it actually looks like Celtic lost the cup rather than Aberdeen won it.
05:13Yeah, I mean, it's hard to not look at it now
05:15and think that that Aberdeen team is the worst team
05:18that's ever won a major trophy in Scottish football history.
05:20But listen, if Aberdeen are the big losers so far this season,
05:25Craig Fowler, who are the big winners?
05:28It's got to be Tony Bloom's Heart of Midlothian.
05:30And we're only five minutes in and already we've become Hearts Fan TV.
05:33Well, to be fair, to be fair, yes, we say the word Hearts quite a lot on this show,
05:37but come on, we'll have to talk about the team that's top of the Scottish Premiers.
05:40Statistically, the best team in Scottish football at this point in time
05:43if we're forgetting about the League Cup.
05:45I mean, it's been an absolutely remarkable season.
05:47Not only are Hearts playing this really super high-tempo, aggressive brand of football,
05:52they're getting big wins.
05:53You know, they won at Ibrox for the first time in years.
05:56They've also managed to do it by signing these unheralded, no-name players
06:00that have been sourced from various outposts around the continent.
06:02This is the point. This is Jamestown Analytics. This is what it is.
06:05You unearth the gems.
06:06So we're signing guys for the fourth tier of Italian football,
06:09the second tier of Norwegian football, for the Slovakian top flight.
06:12There's somebody coming in from Kazakhstan in January.
06:15It all sounds so simple. Yes, aye.
06:18How does Jamestown work? Do you just go on it and go like that?
06:21Cheap, good, zen, massive list. Just sign them all, aye.
06:27Mr McInnes, are you sure? Sign them all.
06:30It seems so simple that why aren't other teams doing this?
06:33Whatever that magic algorithm is that Tory Bloom keeps so secret,
06:37we might never know.
06:38One day we might find out actually exactly what it is.
06:40Maybe it is Tory system, maybe it's just cheap and good
06:42and everybody else is just over-complicating things.
06:44I don't know how secret he makes it.
06:45He came and handed Hearts 10 million pounds so they would use it.
06:49Oh, what a secret. Please use it.
06:51I know you're quite a pragmatic guy, quite a depressing guy at times.
06:55Quite difficult to be around.
06:57But surely, Fowler, you must be getting a wee bit carried away at the moment.
07:00Celtic aren't very good, Rangers even worse.
07:03That leaves it wide open for Hart and Midlodian to win the Premiership title 25-26.
07:08Do you think that?
07:09No, I don't, for obvious reasons.
07:11Warren!
07:12I think it's come maybe a little bit too early,
07:14but do you know what, when Tory Bloom spoke to the Hearts fans today,
07:17he says, I'll be surprised if we don't win a league in ten years.
07:20Surprised!
07:21Initially I was like, oh, don't do this, don't do this.
07:23But now I'm kind of like, well, I can actually see how this model could work.
07:26You bring these guys that are cheap,
07:28and then guys like Braga, guys like Kizaridis,
07:30have them maintained their form next summer,
07:32sell them on for a few million, reinvest it.
07:34Now I'm thinking, hmm, a title in the next ten years could be possible.
07:37You'd be saying that's the model that he's just come up with.
07:40Signed players cheap, sell them for more.
07:43I thought, oh God, Tory Bloom!
07:45I think it's more aggressive, I think it strips out the emotion of it,
07:48and that you don't just hold on to guys because they're fan favourites.
07:51Yeah.
07:52Fans are going to get their hearts broken every single season
07:53because these guys are just going to be moved on as soon as somebody comes in.
07:56As long as they're at the peak value.
07:57Yes.
07:58And as long as they keep doing it and keep winning season upon season,
08:00then it could happen.
08:02Now listen, that's what's been going on in the Scottish Premiership.
08:05I would like to talk about the big winners from the Scottish Championship,
08:09and that is St Johnstone Football Club.
08:11Top of the table, flying high,
08:13an enormous gap between themselves in second place.
08:15Everything is going in their favour.
08:17I just think that St Johnstone are basically,
08:19I already feel like that's done.
08:20They've already won the league.
08:22And with Simo Vallecari there,
08:23it just seemed they were quite brave keeping them on.
08:25It's really easy to get rid of a manager of relegation,
08:27but with his style, the way he wants to play football,
08:30it really suits playing a team at the top end of a league.
08:33And then on top of that,
08:34you've got a guy like Josh McPake,
08:35who has been revitalised, re-energised,
08:38and is arguably the best player outside the top flight at the moment.
08:41And a club should always be looking to play at the highest level possible.
08:44But when they do get relegated,
08:46you want to see them being revitalised.
08:48You're going to see it.
08:49But that's been the case.
08:50Relegation's been good at St Johnstone,
08:52and when they go back to the Premiership,
08:54and I think it is a matter of time,
08:55they will go back a far better club than the one who left.
08:57I never thought I'd say this,
08:58but St Johnstone have got a bit of an aura about it.
09:01I'm stuck with this aura thing.
09:03I've just imagined all the farmers coming up,
09:05having a big aura with the tractors,
09:06with the suspension going up like that.
09:12Not every season can be plain sailing.
09:14There has to be grumbles somewhere,
09:15and it came in the form, weirdly enough,
09:17of a competition, ostensibly for children,
09:20to design a Halloween-themed T-shirt
09:22that would go on sale in the club's store.
09:24And there are a couple of designs submitted,
09:26including one by a professional cartoonist called Steve Bright.
09:29That does give me the vibe that maybe they were like,
09:31the stuff that was coming in was rubbish.
09:33Yeah.
09:34We need to have to sell this.
09:35We want to make a few quid.
09:36Steve-o, you still doing that?
09:37You doing a bit of that old painting still, son?
09:39It's like Adam Webbs going through all these designs.
09:41These are terrible.
09:42These will never sell.
09:43Get me the number of the cartoonist.
09:45Now, St Johnson are the winners in the Scottish Championship.
09:50Who are the losers?
09:51The pre-season favourites, Ross County.
09:54They have been stinking to start the campaign,
09:56and they're already in a new manager
09:58who's now brought in another manager alongside them.
10:01Tony Doherty replacing Downcowie,
10:03and then got Callum Davidson in as his assistant slash defensive coordinator.
10:07But if you said at the beginning of the season
10:09that Ross County would begin the campaign
10:11with four points from eight matches,
10:13and have yet to actually win a game,
10:15I don't think anyone would have believed you.
10:17It was funny, because everybody praised their recruitment,
10:18and then St Johnson's initial sign-ins,
10:20everybody was like, hmm, not sure about them.
10:22But I think maybe in hindsight we got it a bit wrong
10:25on the fact that County went for these guys
10:27who are experienced players,
10:28played for many years at the highest level,
10:30and now they're dropping down a level.
10:31Don't necessarily have a point to prove.
10:33Yes.
10:34On paper, they made a number of good sign-ins,
10:35like Ross Doherty, former Dundee United captain,
10:37and Declan Gallacher, former Scotland international.
10:40Yeah, and now he's been made captain by Tony Doherty,
10:42but he has had an appalling season so far,
10:45and it's best summed up by the game against Queen's Park.
10:48They were beating 2-1 at home,
10:49Gallagher was at fault for the first goal,
10:51and then he was sent off,
10:52hauling down Matty Shields,
10:53and you could just see it written all over him
10:56as he lay there, face down on the turf,
10:58just taking it all in, this disaster of a season,
11:02as the referee's standing there patiently waiting to send him off.
11:04I actually felt the referee is like,
11:06I feel really bad to him,
11:07I'm going to feel really bad,
11:08I'm going to have to show him this.
11:09Because he's lying motionless on the body,
11:11like a dead body,
11:12and the referee's like,
11:13Declan, Declan, Declan,
11:15and then eventually just has to slide the red card.
11:17There's something not quite right at Ross County,
11:23and it'll be very interesting to see how Tony Doherty
11:26extricates the club from their current position.
11:29Tony, let's talk about winners,
11:32let's talk about silly season,
11:34and let's talk about Scottish clubs
11:36having a good laugh on the continent.
11:37What a time to see Hibs and Dundee United
11:40go to some massive heritage European clubs,
11:43going to Rapid Vienna, Partizan, Bilgrade, Legia Wars,
11:46I mean, that's the most successful club in Polish history,
11:49and just caused absolute havoc.
11:51I mean, like, seven goals were scored,
11:52and even if you take away the away side of it,
11:55we saw Kieran Bowie probably score
11:57the greatest goal a Scottish player's ever scored
12:00in European competition,
12:02and it's just, it was so much fun to be a part of.
12:07The videos that we saw from the time in Europe,
12:09particularly saying Hibs away,
12:10I like it, are absolutely fantastic.
12:12Yeah, the one in Denmark where you can see the whole stand,
12:15because Hibs got the whole stand at the back there,
12:17going right along.
12:25And even, like, people, even outside the stands,
12:27people driving around airports, doing like that.
12:33There was something so amazing about it,
12:34because you were going to like some of the,
12:36well, the most intimidating atmospheres in Europe,
12:39Belgrade, Warsaw, famous across Europe,
12:42but then when the goals are going in,
12:44and you're playing these,
12:45they've got the huge flares going everywhere,
12:47absolute mad, and everyone's like,
12:49the...
12:51As always with Scottish football,
12:53it was so close, but, yeah, so far.
12:55Yeah, how do you sum that up then,
12:56the fact that you did come within touch and distance
12:58to getting in the Europa League football?
13:00It was an absolute gut punch,
13:01and like, now, it's like, with all that,
13:03it was like, the six, the six games,
13:05it was like, Thursday, Thursday,
13:07then the league season comes in,
13:08Thursday, Thursday, Thursday,
13:09and then by the time you're out,
13:11I'm absolutely, I was absolutely knackered,
13:13the travelling was mental trying to get back,
13:15and then you've got, and then by the time,
13:16I'm footballed out,
13:17and then you're like,
13:18oh, right, there's an entire season.
13:19Now, there are some stories in Scottish football
13:23that are a bit more complex
13:25and require a deeper analysis,
13:27so I think this is the perfect opportunity
13:29to talk about the hottest topic
13:31that's in Scottish football right now,
13:33and that is fan protests.
13:35There are three clubs in the SPFL,
13:37all of varying levels,
13:38they're all going through their own editions
13:40of Existential Crisis,
13:41so I think it's a good idea to examine them,
13:43talk about them,
13:44and try to understand what is going wrong
13:46at those teams,
13:47and we'll start with yourself.
13:48First, Craig Fowler,
13:49let's talk about Rangers Football Club.
13:51I think it is best summed up
13:53by the game against Livingston last weekend
13:55where Rangers score a 94th minute winner,
13:58and within about five seconds
14:00of that ball hitting the back of the net,
14:01you can hear the Rangers fans chanting,
14:03Martin, Martin, get to fuck.
14:05Russell Martin really can't do right
14:08for doing wrong, can he?
14:09No, they never really liked him from the start.
14:11They didn't really think he had necessarily
14:13the pedigree to manage Rangers,
14:15and they just didn't like him as a person, really.
14:17Yeah, you can remove all the pedigree stuff.
14:19They don't like the fact that he puts his hair around like that.
14:21They don't like what he eats for his dinner.
14:24When he was previewing the Livingston game
14:26with a pair of glasses,
14:27I saw people commenting on him saying,
14:28he's doing this just to wind up.
14:29A man wants to see better,
14:32and it annoys him.
14:34That's just, when you're in that sort of position,
14:36you really are, it's no win.
14:38You're fighting a losing battle.
14:39Yeah.
14:40Yeah, and you saw it as well
14:41with the League Cup game against Hibbs,
14:42one of his, again like the Living game,
14:44one of his rare high points in domestic football so far,
14:47where during the match they've got the big banners
14:50with Martin's face and the no smoking sign over the top of it,
14:53and it was that, Patrick Stewart as well,
14:55the chief executive as well,
14:56who they're obviously blaming for hiring Martin in the first place,
14:59because obviously if you make a mistake manager,
15:01you have to go yourself.
15:02Straight away.
15:03Now, while Rangers are unhappy that their manager is a vegan,
15:06I'm going to talk about a club who are fighting for the very existence,
15:10and that is Hamilton Academico.
15:12You know, the last couple of years have been really difficult
15:15for Aki's fans,
15:16but I think the six months especially have been incredibly testing.
15:19For breaching a number of SPFL rules,
15:21they were deducted 15 points at the tail end of last season.
15:24That ultimately led to the relegation into League One,
15:27and then the day after that it was announced
15:29that the club were moving from New Douglas Park in Hamilton
15:31to Broadwood in Cumbernauld,
15:3314 miles away.
15:34A stadium that no one wants to use.
15:36A stadium that no one wants to use at all.
15:38And then it was revealed a couple of weeks later
15:40to be placed under a transfer embargo
15:42for the breach of these rules.
15:43Now, they took on Montrose on the opening game of the season
15:46at Broadwood,
15:47and before the match a number of fans were protesting outside the ground.
15:50The footage is actually captured there by a vlogger,
15:52and you can see the fans really unhappy
15:54with the move to Cumbernauld,
15:56the mismanagement in the club.
15:58So they're in a real sad place.
16:00The fact that the club has been moved 14 miles down the road,
16:03the fact that they are under a transfer embargo.
16:05There is talk of a takeover,
16:07it's yet to materialise,
16:08but Hamilton's position is pretty perilous.
16:11I kind of find it hard to even try to have a laugh about it,
16:14because it's just really sad.
16:15Imagine that happening to your club.
16:17It's like systematic destruction
16:19from the people who are supposed to be custodians.
16:21If you're a custodian,
16:22you're supposed to be looking after the club,
16:24and it's clear that they're not doing that.
16:26Yeah, definitely.
16:27The idea of financial mismanagement,
16:28I think the director of football,
16:30Jerry Strain,
16:31particularly disliked at the club.
16:32Wait until they find out he's vegan.
16:33They're going to be absolutely furious with it.
16:36But it just shows the contrast in what's going on at the clubs,
16:39and if we're talking about a big club and a smaller club,
16:42let's finish up by looking at a bigger club,
16:44and that's Celtic.
16:45Oh, the biggest club?
16:46Is that what you're saying?
16:47Oh!
16:48Oh, the big team found!
16:50Yeah, like with Celtic,
16:52it's more of an existential thing.
16:54I mean, last year,
16:55after years and years of not moving forward at all in Europe,
16:59they finally sort of break through that.
17:01They finally seem to have found their place in it,
17:03and they were really, really unlucky against Bayern Munich
17:05to get knocked out at that stage.
17:07But from then, it was like that moment.
17:09It was like a switch went off, and it's like,
17:11right, we give up.
17:12They started drawing all the games in the Scottish Premiership,
17:14and now when we've come to the summer,
17:15it's like the transfer window just snuck up on them.
17:18Not everyone just completely forgot about it.
17:21And then they had one of their most embarrassing results
17:23in Europe ever, and they...
17:25They had Almaty.
17:26Yeah.
17:27The Kazakh champions,
17:28who are not a particularly good side.
17:29Yeah, and they went, what, 210 minutes
17:31without scoring a goal against them.
17:32So, for the Celtic fans,
17:34for them, the context is everything.
17:36They put so much into Celtic.
17:38They understand that they have probably
17:40one of the most unique situations in football,
17:42which is perfect for maybe making a speculative signing or two,
17:46getting yourself ready.
17:47This season, for example, the Champions League,
17:49that's not going to be as easy to get from now on.
17:51So, it seemed sensible this time,
17:53from even a business perspective,
17:55never tell you a sporting perspective,
17:56to really get ready and make sure that we make that
17:58so we can push forward.
17:59But they say, no, do it.
18:00It just always feels like Celtic are run like a tiny club,
18:03despite being one of the biggest clubs on the planet.
18:05It's not quite on a scale of Hamilton,
18:07but Celtic fans have got the right to be very angry at their board.
18:10The fans want to feel, when they invest so much time,
18:12money and enthusiasm,
18:14that they're going to try and break into other parts of it.
18:16I think, as well, the fan protest,
18:18everyone needs to be united in order to make them work.
18:21I mean, Celtic protesting at Rugby Park in their away game
18:24against Kilmarnock,
18:25where the fans were going to enter the ground after 12 minutes
18:28to make the point they are the 12th man and without them,
18:31like, self-important of a support.
18:33In theory, it's a good idea, but in practice,
18:35I mean, half their away stand was full by the time they came in.
18:38So, when these fans did turn up,
18:40it looked like a supporters bus had broken down on the way to the ground
18:42and these guys had just made it.
18:43It did not have the impact that it should have done,
18:45because not everyone was pulling in the same direction.
18:47I think a problem with that, as well,
18:49is that you need to vote more with your feet, like, in general.
18:52Rather than doing these things,
18:53we're making a protest of coming in 15 minutes late
18:56or leaving 15 minutes from the end or whatever,
18:58you're still giving the club money.
19:00I think the only way that it ever makes boards set up
19:02and pay attention is to withdraw your funds.
19:05Protests can work, as well.
19:06I mean, and Tony Hibernian,
19:08they've probably had one of the most famous fan movements
19:10in Scottish football.
19:11Yeah, I mean, we take you back to 1990.
19:14I was four years old.
19:16This is actually my earliest memory of football.
19:19It was Wallace Mercer.
19:20He tried to make an aggressive takeover.
19:22Hibbs, I mean, he called it a merger,
19:23but he was going to use the football club of Hibernian
19:26and Heart of Midlothian.
19:27It was an incredible time,
19:32because to see, like, they unified the whole Hibbs fan base,
19:35and it was like military precision.
19:37They'd done a six-week campaign
19:39where there are buses going through Edinburgh.
19:41Like, this is when Sunshine Leaf became
19:43the unofficial anthem of the club.
19:45The proclaimers were there.
19:46They were hosting gigs at the Usher Hall in Edinburgh,
19:49and it all ended with David Duff,
19:51who was the chairman at Hibbs there,
19:52and he wasn't very popular because, obviously,
19:54his financial mismanagement is what led to this situation.
19:57Wallace Mercer needed his shares to get over there.
19:59He actually sat in Wallace Mercer's office
20:02and set fire to his shares in front of them.
20:04So, I mean, this is such a cultural movement,
20:07and the T-shirts were really, really cool.
20:09So, it's like the memory of...
20:10Hands off Hibbs. It's a good name as well, yeah.
20:12Hands off Hibbs. It all really worked.
20:14So, now you can look back at a difficult time.
20:16It's now probably one of the most romanticised periods,
20:18and managing to get Tom Farmer to come forward
20:21and save the club like his grandfather done a hundred years earlier,
20:25done the exact same thing, despite not being involved in football.
20:27It now looks as actually quite a magical time.
20:30Hibbs went on and won the Skull Cup that season.
20:32I think in every instance, though, the protest, they can be justified.
20:35Yes, the barrier for entry might have reduced in recent years,
20:38and yes, if you're just unhappy the fact your manager's got a middle parting,
20:41then you need to have...
20:43Glasses.
20:44And glasses.
20:45You need to have slightly higher standards,
20:46but I always think that it's all relative to the football club.
20:49The fact that people think Celtic
20:51the most successful football club in the country
20:53are just unhappy that they're not winning.
20:55They don't have as good a squad as they think.
20:58That's all relative to the fans.
20:59The fact that Rangers fans are not happy with the direction of the club,
21:01it's all relative to them.
21:02The fact that Hamilton fans are not happy with the very existence of their club...
21:06Everyone would be angry about that.
21:07It's all relative to them.
21:08So, yeah, I think that in most instances, protests are correct.
21:12Yeah, everybody in football should have the right, as a fan,
21:16to hold accountable the people who are in charge of your club,
21:18because without that, then things could get a lot worse.
21:21And nowadays in Scottish football, we have so much foreign investment,
21:24the clubs have now been further away from their communities,
21:26let's be honest.
21:27Especially in Hamilton's case.
21:29And we have to treat that with suspicion.
21:33People have to prove their reasons for being involved,
21:36and protest is the quickest way to do that.
21:38I suppose it's like a first love that you can't let go of.
21:56It doesn't actually feel like we've been away.
22:08It seems like we've been more like an exile or something.
22:11We're waiting to come back.
22:23Our journey to our new home takes us past the stadium,
22:27which is quite ironic.
22:30We finish our game, we cross down the bridge,
22:33and there they are.
22:35I mean, it's Caledonian Thistle.
22:38It's almost comical.
22:42We wish them all the worst, and oh my God!
22:45I just wish that they took our Thistle part away,
22:50so as not to confuse anybody with what we have going,
22:54which is the rebirth of Imerness Thistle.
22:56Imerness Thistle.
22:59My name's Russell Hepburn.
23:00Imerness Thistle, obviously, my club.
23:03We were formed in 1885,
23:04and we're the inaugural champions of the Highland League.
23:09I was taken to Thistle Park from the age of four onwards
23:12with family and relatives.
23:14It had always been in my blood.
23:17Growing up as a Thistle fan was a great experience
23:19because in those days we had brilliant derby matches.
23:22So local rival were called Caledonian or Cali,
23:27and that was a brilliant occasion,
23:29something to really look forward to.
23:31Previous team, our last ever competitive fixture
23:34versus Lossiemouth, that's 93-94.
23:38In 92-93, I think it was,
23:40there seemed to be a groundswell of opinion
23:43that Thistle and Cali would have to merge as one team.
23:47The merger of Inverness clubs Caledonian and Thistle
23:49became an on-field reality at the weekend,
23:52it's not hard to see why the Thistle fans are so blue.
23:56Dead set against it, as all Ardent fans were.
24:00The new team's strip is almost a carbon copy
24:02of the old blue Cali shirt.
24:04The team's playing in Cali Park with Cali's former manager
24:07and most of Cali's players.
24:09It was never a question of would I ever attend
24:11and follow that club.
24:13It was never a question,
24:14so basically that was my Saturdays
24:16and the football capacity had gone.
24:18That was it finished.
24:20To me, Thistle were the first and last.
24:22Then once they went,
24:23I would never have a passion to support another club.
24:26I kind of lost a lot of love for football.
24:29It's been indifference every other Saturday for 31 years.
24:39I got a phone call saying that there was a small group
24:44floating the idea of bringing Thistle back.
24:46Obviously, I just jumped onto that.
24:48It was a no-brainer, absolutely.
25:01I mean, it's Thistle FC founded in 2024,
25:04gained admittance into the North Caledonian League
25:07and that's the sixth tier of Scottish football.
25:11Ah, brilliant, mate.
25:13They've even got the wonky touchlines.
25:16It's exciting, they've been playing well.
25:17It's a good concept and people are buying into it.
25:21Ah, it's a cracker, isn't it?
25:34So now you have us playing in much lesser league
25:37outside of town.
25:40You've got to start somewhere.
25:43It's kind of funny coming here
25:44because obviously it's not a stadium as such,
25:46we don't have the main stand,
25:47the tin shed and whatnot.
25:48There's no admittance fee.
25:49You come for a gate,
25:50you're on the sidelines,
25:51you're behind this piece of rope and whatnot.
25:54But it's a great hope.
25:57The Jags usually play in the red and black vertical strides
25:59as in AC Milan.
26:00Today we're playing the waist strip,
26:01which has always been the sky blue
26:03with the purple trim.
26:05I keep saying I'm never going to wear it again
26:06because it sounds like 31 years of age.
26:08Can't help it.
26:09I've not seen these guys for years
26:23and I know it means as much to them as it means to me.
26:26The memories and everything just comes flooding back.
26:29It's like a huge reunion on the sidelines.
26:31Southside, what's the way?
26:32Go yourself, go yourself.
26:33Go!
26:34Go!
26:35Go!
26:37Go!
26:53Hey guys, Jack,
26:54wait.
26:55Go!
26:56Yes!
26:57Hello!
26:58Alright.
26:59Beautiful!
27:01Yes!
27:02Yes!
27:03Our ultimate aim is to get back into playing in the Hangman League.
27:17For me, just getting our club, our colours, and my Saturdays back,
27:21it's incredible.
27:25Miracles do button.
27:33So, as autumn rolls in, we are well and truly in the midst of the season.
27:39Every team's squad is settled,
27:41and we know the difference from our great white hopes
27:43to our great big huddies.
27:45And I want to discuss this magical time in a bit more depth,
27:48that magical time known as the summer transfer window.
27:52Now, every nation that's involved with FIFA and UEFA
27:55has a summer transfer window,
27:57but no-one does it quite as good as Scotland.
28:00Craig Fowler, what does the transfer window mean to you?
28:03The transfer window is a special and unique time of the year,
28:07especially the summer transfer window,
28:09because in January, there's still a lot of moving parts going on.
28:11Summer, there's no football,
28:13and you've drawn a line under what's come before,
28:15usually crushing disappointment.
28:17But the summer offers hope.
28:19It offers the ability that anybody you bring in
28:22can be the next club hero,
28:24the next player to lead you to, like, cup victory or a league title
28:28and forever be somebody that's going to be within your heart.
28:30But even when they're signed from a low level
28:33and some fans are like,
28:35well, I'm not sure about this,
28:36there's always an instance of somebody you can fall back on.
28:38Well, well, he came from that level and he was brilliant.
28:41So it's just the time of the year
28:42where everybody's at their most happiest
28:44because anything is possible.
28:46Everyone's at their happiest,
28:47but everyone's also at their most curious, Tony,
28:50and it turns some people into detectives.
28:52Oh, man, this new thing.
28:54People are so desperate to know who's coming into their club.
28:58You can't wait for the tweet to drop.
28:59Everybody wants to be ITK.
29:01Yeah, everyone wants to have that.
29:03And my favourite part of this genre that I've seen in recent years
29:06is there was a guy on Hibs.net called Saul Goodman.
29:10All right?
29:11And he, through, like, scouring social media profiles,
29:15for this player it was specifically Stefan Omionga,
29:18he managed to figure out that he was leaving
29:20at a specific time on us flight
29:23and he managed to look at the flight times and work out,
29:25well, that was four hours ago,
29:26so that means he might have been on the flight from Milan
29:29that was at 6am landing at 10 past 8 in Edinburgh.
29:32So he's figuring all this out.
29:34And then Omionga posts something on his social media with the sun,
29:38and I quote,
29:39you can see the reflection of the sun in the wingtip of the plane.
29:42The sun is rising on the opposite side of the plane to him,
29:45ergo, the plane is flying north over the Swiss Alps and not south.
29:49And, yes, it might be insane, but he was absolutely spot on.
29:53That's just an incredible level of detail
29:55just to find out whether or not a fairly ordinary midfielder...
29:59..or it's going to be during your football club.
30:01Every summer transfer window, that's a time when squads are turned over,
30:04and you might see that, like, to a real big extent,
30:06where sometimes 20 players leave, 20 players come in,
30:09but it's normally done over a period of several months.
30:12It's very rare that clubs will turn over the entire teams
30:15all on the same day,
30:16but that's exactly what happened to Kilmarnock in the summer of 2016.
30:21On the 30th of June 2016,
30:24the then-manager Lee Clark brought 11 players
30:27into his club at the one time,
30:30as we can see with this incredible photograph
30:33that was posted on Kilmarnock's Twitter page.
30:35Now, I'm going to do my best Norm Macdonald
30:37at the YouTube Awards voice here
30:39when I list all 11 players.
30:41The true stars of this period of time at Kilmarnock
30:59is the admin staff.
31:00Like, that is an absolute...
31:02What a job.
31:02Yeah, yeah, they're all the guys all the same.
31:05We need pensions, we need HR,
31:07we need all sorts of cheers, lads, all the best.
31:08They not only had the infamous photo,
31:12but they also had a press conference
31:13where the journalists spoke to every single one of them
31:16at the same time.
31:16How long's the desk, can you just imagine?
31:19And that's what, again, what makes it so magical,
31:21is anything that happened last season,
31:23it doesn't matter.
31:24Here's a brand new team, they've been entirely signed.
31:26Everything you knew doesn't matter.
31:27A lot of the time when we see new players coming in
31:30in the summer transfer window,
31:31there's a lot of hype created about them.
31:32You know, they get absolutely fantastic graphics,
31:34incredible photographs, you know,
31:36there's like a real team of people involved,
31:38you know, Photoshop, After Effects,
31:40the works, the hype up these players
31:42and make them look as magnificent as possible.
31:45Wasn't quite the case in the summer of 2017
31:47when Stennis Muir signed Ross Dunlop and Mick Dunlop
31:50from Albay and Rovers,
31:51and rather than putting them in a glitzy studio
31:53and giving them a lot of pizzazz and razzmatazz,
31:55they basically took photographs of them
31:57in McDonald's restaurant, signing their contracts.
32:00As Fowler mentioned earlier,
32:01everyone wants to be ITK about the summer transfer window,
32:05but some people like to play pranks
32:07and our very own Joel Sked fell foul
32:10of one of these pranks recently.
32:12Oh, this one.
32:13From Handsome Flacco Jodoye,
32:16are we looking at Anderlecht striker Haywood Jablomi?
32:19I need to double it,
32:21I need to see if this is actually a real person.
32:23It's like you're getting Bart Simpson.
32:25Yeah.
32:27Haywood Jablomi.
32:28Ah, OK, I see what's happened here.
32:33I've just read that I'm ahead.
32:35Oh, dear.
32:37I bet that will live with me.
32:38I put it in the video.
32:40Haywood Jablomi, that will stay with me forever.
32:44I'm not just the same thing,
32:45mouthing the words out.
32:47Penny's dropped.
32:48I've just been made a fool of you.
32:50Just another day at the office.
32:53There's been a lot of players that have come in
32:55over the summer.
32:56Tony, who has been your favourite so far?
32:59Ah, Thatcher, this is really easy.
33:00Emmanuel Longelo.
33:02All right, thank you.
33:02That's signed for Motherwell.
33:04He's signed from Birmingham
33:05for a reported, like, a six-figure fee.
33:07But this guy is liquid Scottish football.
33:10You cannot miss him on the pitch.
33:11His engine up and down left-hand side.
33:13He's really good at dribbling.
33:14He drops over, slal him in three players.
33:16But always, when it gets to them,
33:17he just crosses the ball at the pitch.
33:19It's mesmerising.
33:22But on top of that,
33:24he might not have brought his crossing boots,
33:25but he's absolutely brought his shooting boots.
33:27He's already got four goals from Motherwell.
33:29From full-back, right now,
33:31I think he's been involved in 44% of their league goals.
33:35This guy is pure Scottish football,
33:37and I hope it just continues to rattle on this way.
33:40There is a lot of football taking place over the weekend,
33:44and I think we owe it to ourselves and to our viewers
33:46to select the very best games,
33:48the connoisseur's choice of where to go at the weekend.
33:51And we've got a Hearts fan,
33:53and we've got a Hibs fan,
33:54and I think in the Scottish Premiership,
33:56there is only one game we can discuss,
33:58the Edinburgh Derby.
33:59Yeah, the pissed-up Derby,
34:00as it'll be this weekend,
34:01because this game is live on the telly
34:03at 5.45 kick-off on a Saturday.
34:06All police leave cancelled.
34:07Yeah, I have no idea how the police actually agreed to this,
34:11but do you know what?
34:12Hopefully, everybody behaves themselves to an extent.
34:14You still want the tribalism,
34:15you still want the hatred,
34:17but it should lead, at the very least,
34:19to an absolutely cracking atmosphere,
34:20and hopefully, almost expectantly,
34:23surely, surely, with everything going on with both teams,
34:26we should have a good game of football
34:27between the two for a change.
34:29How are you feeling about it, Phil?
34:31Are you feeling confident?
34:32I'm actually confident,
34:33especially since Timbs have won the last two matches.
34:36One defeat and eight.
34:38Aye, still stings.
34:39I feel like we're due.
34:40Hibs are doing reasonably well at the moment.
34:41Maybe they would have hoped to be doing a little bit better than this,
34:44concerning how good they were last season,
34:45and how good they looked in the European games.
34:48But they're still undefeated in the league,
34:50and Hearts, obviously, spoke about them earlier.
34:52Absolutely flying at the top of the table.
34:53Hearts at home.
34:54So, yeah, I do have confidence that
34:55Hearts will use that momentum going into this game
34:58to be able to get the better of their rivals.
35:00I am buzzing about the fact that, obviously,
35:02because Hibs are still undefeated,
35:04but not in as a cool way as possibly Hearts,
35:06and the hand-wringing that's gone on,
35:08as always, about Hearts being good,
35:09it always just hits the stratosphere.
35:11So to do it this time,
35:13go to Tyne Castle and beat them,
35:14and actually be the only undefeated team left in Edinburgh,
35:18I think will be very, very sweet.
35:20You're pretty confident in this one, Tony.
35:21You're pretty juiced up for it.
35:22All these guys that have come for these lower league teams of that,
35:26have you ever played in the real stuff where it's like poison?
35:29Everyone's like, how are they going to couple off?
35:30Let's find out.
35:33Well, you know, it's something that's a very compelling argument
35:35to go to Tyne Castle for this one,
35:37but I suggest that you can maybe make a doubleheader of this.
35:40I'm going to talk about the real Edinburgh derby.
35:43It's taking place at Ainsley Park at 3 o'clock
35:45between the Spartans and Edinburgh City.
35:47This is going to be a fantastic game.
35:49It's top of League 2 versus the bottom of League 2.
35:52I think there's a lot riding in this one.
35:53But really, the teams are pretty evenly matched
35:56because we're talking about a points deduction
35:57that's really making it like this, isn't it?
35:59Aye, I think it's important to talk about Edinburgh's current situation.
36:02They were deducted 15 points at the beginning of the season,
36:04which really scuppered any hopes they had of challenging for the title.
36:08They triggered an insolvency event
36:10for owing a small bit of money to a creditor.
36:12And even though it was only for such a short period,
36:14that comes with a 15-point deduction.
36:16However, it has had a galvanising effect in the club.
36:19They have been chipping away at that 15-point deduction.
36:22They've been playing some pretty good football at the process
36:24and if they can win on Saturday, it takes them to zero points.
36:27That might not sound like a particularly great achievement,
36:30but I think psychologically, it's enormous for them
36:32and I think that can give them the platform to go and kick up the table.
36:35It's not out with Realms of Possibility,
36:37but I think Edinburgh could actually finish in the playoffs this season,
36:39even with that points deduction.
36:41Well, I mean, you are quite literally the mouthpiece
36:43of Edinburgh City football.
36:45Oh, yeah!
36:46I don't mind saying that.
36:48I think Edinburgh City could take on Real Madrid
36:51and I think Michael McAdoo's team have got a wee bit of a chance here.
36:55But it's also still going to be a really tough game
36:57because the Spartans are flying at the top of the table.
36:59A four-point lead over East Coast Round.
37:01Not many people saw that coming out of this season.
37:03The teams don't like each other.
37:04That goes back a number of years.
37:06But the Spartans do have the edge here.
37:08Last season, they won both encounters at Ainsley Park.
37:11Got a lot riding on this one.
37:12So, aye, make it a double-header.
37:14Ainsley Park in the afternoon.
37:16Tyncastle later in the evening.
37:17Well, that all sounds exceptional.
37:20It'll be a wonderful day out
37:21and you're expecting some great football,
37:24but it's all a bit mainstream, is it not?
37:26I mean, it's all a bit like...
37:27Spartans versus Edinburgh City, yeah.
37:30I'm sorry, right, Tony.
37:31It is too mainstream, I'm sorry.
37:33Did you get a ticket for the Oasis game?
37:35Did you enjoy it?
37:37But to know things that are going to be good,
37:39you need things that are bad to have that yin and yang.
37:43So, I want to take you to, quite literally,
37:46the worst full-time team in Scotland,
37:50and that is up the north-east once again,
37:52where football is going to die this year,
37:54and Cove Rangers are away at East Fife.
37:57Yeah, it's not been a good season at all for Cove Rangers.
38:00They lost to Celtic Hearts the weekend, beating 2-0,
38:02and they're actually adrift at the bottom of League One.
38:06It's not been a good season at all for Paul Hartley.
38:08I think there's been, like, cutbacks at the club.
38:11Yeah, they don't seem to have any players.
38:12No, cutbacks at the club doesn't necessarily
38:14be able to recruit the players that you want.
38:16A lot of key players are missing.
38:17Mikey Doyle, one of the most reliable players in the squad,
38:19he's out injured, Fraser Fivey, Declan Glass.
38:22It's effectively a lot of young, inexperienced players
38:24taking their first steps in the game,
38:26smattered with a bit of experience there.
38:27It's not going well.
38:28It's good that you've given, like, a bit of context to people,
38:31because for me, when I was looking at it, I was like,
38:34did they not finish second last season
38:35and were on the brink of being promoted to the championship.
38:38So I was a bit, that's the reason I wanted to go.
38:40Like, what the hell is going on in there?
38:42And East Fife, they're mid-table,
38:44but they've been, like, their games have been really exciting.
38:46I mean, they've averaged in three goals a game this year.
38:49So even though we're talking about everything that's going to be bad,
38:52we're doing it in a world where I think there's going to be
38:54loads of goals and loads of excitement.
38:55Well, gentlemen, I think that'll do us for the time being,
38:59but before we head up the road,
39:01can I ask you both to take me on a little game known as The Banker.
39:06Yes, it is back for season number eight.
39:10You know how it works by now.
39:12It's me versus The Stink.
39:14Every week, we guess the outcome of Scottish football matches
39:18and we get points for every correct prediction we make.
39:21This week, just like every other week, we are competing for this.
39:26The Eamon Brophy Lone Wolf Trophy.
39:29Bigger, better and more beautiful than it was last year.
39:34You can barely look at it, it's so sparkly.
39:36And it's something that's got wings as well.
39:38Where did they come from?
39:39To fly away from you when you're trying to win it.
39:43No more, Tony, no more.
39:46That trophy is going to be mine.
39:48And now, Scotland men's team have got two enormous games
39:52coming up next week in their World Cup qualifying campaign.
39:55And to celebrate that fact, the stipulation this week is
39:59you can pick from any team in the SPFL to win,
40:03but they must be managed by a former Scotland international
40:06or a former Scotland B international.
40:09So, limited options, but options all the same.
40:14Not as many as you'd think.
40:15But Craig Fowler, we'll come to you first.
40:17What are you going for?
40:18I'm going to ignore Derek McInnesy's humble Scotland career.
40:20Come on.
40:21And instead, I'm going to go for
40:24Partick Thistle and Mark Wilson
40:26to beat our both at home.
40:29It's a tricky game.
40:30Our both are doing a lot better in the Championship
40:31than I think many expected coming into this season.
40:34So, I wouldn't be surprised if this is a bit of a banana skin.
40:37But Thistle are just flying at this point in time.
40:39They're winning every single week.
40:40They're playing some really nice football.
40:41And a lot of Thistle fans who, in the summer,
40:44were really unsure about how it happened,
40:47how Wilson got the job.
40:48Felt he was kind of like a cheaper option
40:49or kind of a lazy option.
40:51And he didn't have the best of managerial careers before that.
40:54But fair play to him.
40:55He's really getting a tune out of this team.
40:57He's absolutely cooking at the moment.
40:58And I'm really annoyed because that was exactly the game
41:01that I was going to go for.
41:02Yes.
41:03But nevertheless, still plenty to pick from.
41:05So, I'm going to look very close to home
41:07and I am going to back Stennis Muir manager Gary Naismith,
41:10one of the best left-backs this country has ever produced.
41:13I'm going to back his team to beat Montrose.
41:15Now, Montrose are in really good form at the moment.
41:18Really good form, actually.
41:19Six wins and undefeated in seven in all competitions.
41:22And Stennis Muir, yes, they lost against Hamilton Academical
41:24at the weekend.
41:25But prior to that, they were absolutely flying.
41:27And I think it's a really good opportunity
41:28for Stennis Muir to bounce back.
41:30Stennis Muir to win.
41:32And a point to me.
41:33Tony Anderson, what's his second pick?
41:35Let's go to Pataudry,
41:37where Aberdeen are playing Dundee
41:39with Stephen Presley, of course,
41:41having a pretty big Scotland career in the past.
41:45And this seems like two teams,
41:48it's the two teams at the bottom of the division.
41:50And we were talking about Russell Martin earlier,
41:54another manager who came in
41:55and everyone was already unhappy about.
41:57Stephen Presley, man, they were not impressed.
42:00And again, we've got to the same thing.
42:02They don't like the way he sits.
42:03They don't like the way that his hair lies.
42:06They don't like the fact that maybe he's aged
42:08since he last saw him.
42:12But it feels like such a massive game.
42:15I mean, it's huge.
42:16For both clubs, it could be huge repentance
42:18because suddenly it could change the whole narrative about him.
42:20He's got a big win away from home.
42:23And like I said, for Aberdeen,
42:24it would really be we are kicking around end of days.
42:27So that's Stephen Presley's Dundee to get the win at Pataudry.
42:30Why not?
42:30Now, for my final pick,
42:33I'm going to go to the capital city.
42:34There's a very, very big game taking place.
42:37And I'm back in Edinburgh City to beat the Spartans.
42:40It's simple.
42:40Michael McIndoe, a Scotland B cap.
42:44Listen, I would run through brick walls for that man.
42:47I know.
42:48And I'm not one of his players.
42:49I just think it's a great opportunity for the Spartans
42:52to extend their lead at the top of the table.
42:55But there's so much riding in it for Edinburgh City.
42:57And if they can get to zero points,
42:58particularly against the Spartans,
43:01I think it's going to be enormous for them.
43:02So I am backing the citizens for this one.
43:04Did sign off a very good record in the Derby last year as well?
43:07They won two games where they were both at home.
43:09They lost both games away.
43:10Ah, right, OK.
43:11The law of averages.
43:12The law of averages, serious back.
43:14Listen, that's the best thing to put your faith in,
43:17the law of averages.
43:17Because if you can't think of any rational or analytical reason
43:21to pick someone, just go over the law of averages.
43:23Eight seasons of doing this,
43:24and that's what you become your tagline,
43:28because it's just easier.
43:29Yeah, that's...
43:29Law of averages, cheers.
43:31A view from the terrace.
43:33The law of averages.
43:36Take, take, take, talk, talk, talk, talk a lot.
43:39One last night for all, say, say.
43:42Is it going to be the same?
43:44Do you know that man who used to say?
43:47Every minute, I want to get a summer from the cities.
43:50I've had a search without a lazy eye on the side.
43:53Any other companies can ignore us and what I say.
43:56I've had a search without a lazy eye on the side.
44:00I've had a search without a lazy eye on the side.
44:00I've had a search without a lazy eye on the side.
44:02I've had a search without a lazy eye on the side.
44:03I've had a search without a lazy eye on the side.
44:04I've had a search without a lazy eye on the side.
44:05I've had a search without a lazy eye on the side.
44:06I've had a search without a lazy eye on the side.
44:07I've had a search without a lazy eye on the side.
44:08I've had a search without a lazy eye on the side.
44:09I've had a search without a lazy eye on the side.
44:10I've had a search without a lazy eye on the side.
44:11I've had a search without a lazy eye on the side.
44:12I've had a search without a lazy eye on the side.
Recommended
44:00
|
Up next
3:00
0:30
13:45
0:31
1:00:23
1:00:53
44:06
49:48
43:59
41:13
39:06
41:14
40:05
44:04
46:42
38:00
45:25
42:18
Be the first to comment