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Transcript
00:00:30Hello? Cheryl, we have to talk about our birthday plans. I mean, it's only two days away, and we still haven't decided the perfect way to celebrate. So, I was thinking, maybe we could all take a trip, too.
00:00:54Sue, I meant to tell you before, but I wanted to be sure. I think I'm going to spend my birthday with Jake. I'm going to lose my virginity to him. You know, I want to surprise him.
00:01:06What? But you can't. I mean, I thought we were going to wait until marriage.
00:01:13Besides, you can't do that to us.
00:01:15You can't break tradition that way.
00:01:19This is bad. You know, I'm going to tell Lexi. She's going to be very unhappy about this.
00:01:24Come on, Lexi.
00:01:33So, girls, what are we going to do for our birthday?
00:01:52Sue, we have plenty of time to figure something out.
00:01:55But this is the big one eight. I mean, every year since our mom's met in the hospital, we've done something new and special. But this has to be newer and more special. So, what's something we've never done before?
00:02:10Mushrooms?
00:02:11No, not like that. Like something nice.
00:02:14Like maybe a trip.
00:02:16Like a mushroom trip?
00:02:18No.
00:02:18Sorry, Sue. I have a date.
00:02:23Oh, so do I.
00:02:26Sorry, Sue.
00:02:27Don't worry, Sue. We'll figure it out.
00:02:42Oh, flowers. Are these from you?
00:02:44Yeah, sure.
00:02:47Here you go.
00:02:48No card, but I thought I saw one.
00:02:51I didn't know how to put my feelings into words.
00:02:54I guess, um, you still make me nervous.
00:03:01Oh, Jake.
00:03:06Maybe I should come in and hang out for a minute.
00:03:09Uh, no, Jake. Not yet.
00:03:11When we do it, I want it to be really special.
00:03:14The best night of my life.
00:03:15It will be. I promise.
00:03:17It will always be amazing.
00:03:19With you.
00:03:20And me.
00:03:22Together.
00:03:30Jake, no.
00:03:31I have to go.
00:03:32I have to work on my art project.
00:03:35You know, I thought art was going to be a really easy elective,
00:03:38but I guess I should have taken more math.
00:03:40Uh, so you're going to come to my birthday, okay?
00:03:45This Saturday?
00:03:46Of course.
00:03:52Thanks.
00:03:54Okay. Bye.
00:03:55Oh, baby.
00:04:09You're so hot.
00:04:10I'm going to do you so good.
00:04:11Oh, yeah, baby.
00:04:13Yeah.
00:04:13What was your name again?
00:04:14Rod.
00:04:16Sex guy.
00:04:16Lexi is so upset, she's speechless.
00:04:26Yeah, right.
00:04:27I bet.
00:04:34Cheryl's losing her virginity on Saturday?
00:04:38Oh, no.
00:04:39Does not compute.
00:04:41Want to talk in person ASAP.
00:04:47Oh, huh.
00:04:48Hi.
00:04:51When did you get home?
00:04:52So, is it true?
00:04:54Yes, it is.
00:04:56It's just, it's the right time, and Jake's the right man.
00:04:59I mean, he's handsome, and smart, and wealthy, and he has a really bright future ahead of
00:05:08him, so I just think it's the right time.
00:05:12Lexi, tell her, losing our virginity is one of those milestones we should all face together.
00:05:17On our birthday, yes, but not on this birthday.
00:05:20Like, maybe on our 23rd birthday, or maybe even, like, our 29th, 8th, maybe.
00:05:27Listen, guys, I'm, I know it's tradition, but, I'm sorry.
00:05:36I know it's tradition, but, I'm sorry.
00:05:46But Cheryl, Sue is right.
00:05:48We do always do something special on our birthday.
00:05:52Does Jake really have such a tiny little needle dip?
00:05:55It's not Jake.
00:05:58It's the male ideal.
00:06:00Like, a Greek god, or Sue's dad.
00:06:05Right.
00:06:07Oh, yeah, I guess you're right.
00:06:09Me and it kind of suck, because I'm not really an artist.
00:06:12Girls, can you just stop changing the subject?
00:06:14The point is, we should all lose our virginities together on the same day, and I'm just not
00:06:20ready yet.
00:06:20I'm waiting for a sign, and then I'll know it's right.
00:06:24Look, I can go either way.
00:06:27I mean, I'm fine with just 69, 79, anal.
00:06:31I don't feel any rush to actually do the deed.
00:06:35Besides, I know it'll never live up to my rabbit anyway.
00:06:37But, if you want to do it this year, then, maybe we all should.
00:06:44You know, it could be like our big 18th birthday thing.
00:06:52Where are you going at 6.30 in the morning?
00:06:55To church.
00:06:56To pray for you.
00:06:57Want to be first in line.
00:07:00I'm getting this is...
00:07:01Yeah, me too.
00:07:02Forgive me, Father, for I have sinned.
00:07:15It's been four days since my last confession.
00:07:17I accused myself of the following sins.
00:07:19Mm-hmm.
00:07:22Okay, so I'm really embarrassed to talk about this, but...
00:07:26It's about sex.
00:07:28Mm-hmm.
00:07:29I mean, not me.
00:07:32I've never gone past second base with a guy.
00:07:35Aw.
00:07:37I've never even seen a guy's...
00:07:39Well, there was that one time I took the pants off my Ken doll.
00:07:42But I was dressing him up as Jesus, and I wanted to see his thing.
00:07:47But there was nothing there.
00:07:51Okay, so it's about my friends.
00:07:53My best friends.
00:07:56They're going to do something really bad this weekend.
00:07:58Okay.
00:08:00Third base.
00:08:02What?
00:08:03No.
00:08:04Like, sex.
00:08:05Like, intercourse.
00:08:07With boys, they barely even know.
00:08:08I mean, they really need us intervention.
00:08:10If you know what I mean.
00:08:12All the way.
00:08:13Go all the way.
00:08:16Woody?
00:08:17What?
00:08:19Ah!
00:08:21How could you do so?
00:08:24You're a bad, bad person.
00:08:26You're a bad person.
00:08:28What?
00:08:34Yes.
00:08:36Yes!
00:08:37Run!
00:08:38Run!
00:08:39Home route!
00:08:41Ah!
00:08:42Damn it!
00:08:44Fuck you, Yankees.
00:08:48Sorry.
00:08:49Sue, it is 1 p.m.
00:09:16What do you have a little consideration?
00:09:18I'm trying to sleep.
00:09:20Jeez, can you guys please keep it down?
00:09:24I have an announcement to make.
00:09:26I want to do it.
00:09:28Do you hear me?
00:09:29I want to do it.
00:09:32This weekend.
00:09:34On our birthday.
00:09:35Do what?
00:09:36It.
00:09:38Screw.
00:09:39Screw.
00:09:40You know, screwing, boning, making the beast with two backs.
00:09:44You know, shagging.
00:09:45Fucking.
00:09:48You do.
00:09:50But what about all your religious stuff?
00:09:53And what about your sign from heaven?
00:09:56Oh, I got a sign at church.
00:09:58Really?
00:10:00Well, okay, great.
00:10:03We're all in, then.
00:10:05So we'll have a big pool party, and we'll do it there.
00:10:09Right?
00:10:10Right.
00:10:13I'll start making the shopping list.
00:10:23Hey, Frank.
00:10:26Hi, Sue.
00:10:26Guys, we didn't invite Frank to the party.
00:10:31I don't know.
00:10:31Do you think he'd even have fun?
00:10:33Yeah, he's blind.
00:10:35Blind people can do everything regular people can do.
00:10:42Wait, are you back?
00:10:44Hey.
00:10:45Um, I was wondering.
00:10:46We're throwing this party tomorrow night.
00:10:49It's for our birthdays.
00:10:51Do you want to come?
00:10:52Do you think he can see at my shorts?
00:10:56Well, the house looks done.
00:11:10Tomorrow's the big day.
00:11:12We finally turn 18.
00:11:13And finally lose our virginity.
00:11:16Well, we better get our beady sleep, because the party starts tomorrow at 2.
00:11:19So, okay, we know who Cheryl's going to do it with, Jake, and I'll probably do that guy, Rod.
00:11:26But Sue, who are you going to pick?
00:11:27It's a pot of your chair.
00:11:29It's easy.
00:11:30I've known for the past six years, ever since catty-kism.
00:11:33What the fuck is catty-kism?
00:11:38I think it's a baby panda wrapped in peanut butter.
00:11:40Yeah.
00:11:50My soulmate.
00:11:54Chris?
00:11:55Sue, you, um, might want to think about picking a backup.
00:12:00I mean...
00:12:00What?
00:12:01No.
00:12:02Chris is perfect.
00:12:03He played Jesus in Jesus Christ Superstar last year at camp.
00:12:06Plus, his name's Chris.
00:12:08It's a sign.
00:12:09Sue, the only sign is that Chris has a major case of gay face.
00:12:15What?
00:12:16He does not.
00:12:17Anyway, there's no such thing as gay face.
00:12:19He looks just like Justin Bieber.
00:12:22With a little bit of Zac Efron and just a hint of Ryan Seacrest.
00:12:26Who the fuck's Ryan Seacrest?
00:12:28Look, Chris is my soulmate.
00:12:32Okay, well, sweet dreams.
00:12:35See you in the morning.
00:12:43I knew it would happen someday.
00:12:45I just didn't expect it to happen so soon.
00:12:47I just didn't expect it to happen.
00:12:50I just didn't expect it to happen.
00:12:50I just didn't expect it to happen.
00:12:51I just didn't expect it to happen.
00:12:52I just didn't expect it to happen.
00:12:53I just didn't expect it to happen.
00:12:53I just didn't expect it to happen.
00:12:54I just didn't expect it to happen.
00:12:55I just didn't expect it to happen.
00:12:56I just didn't expect it to happen.
00:12:57I just didn't expect it to happen.
00:12:58I just didn't expect it to happen.
00:12:59I just didn't expect it to happen.
00:13:00I just didn't expect it to happen.
00:13:01I just didn't expect it to happen.
00:13:02I just didn't expect it to happen.
00:13:03I just didn't expect it to happen.
00:13:04I just didn't expect it to happen.
00:13:05I just didn't expect it to happen.
00:13:06I just didn't expect it to happen.
00:13:07You're so perfect.
00:13:37You knew that's what I look like.
00:14:05Too bad no one could ever compare to you.
00:14:31Tomorrow's the day.
00:14:38Tomorrow's the day.
00:14:45Tomorrow's the day.
00:14:52Tomorrow's the day.
00:14:57Tomorrow's the day.
00:15:04Lexi, Cheryl, hurry.
00:15:09Ew, why?
00:15:11It's for Jake to unwrap me.
00:15:13It's going to be really sexy.
00:15:14I'm going to spread it.
00:15:16You're going to die of asphyxiation.
00:15:18It's going to be really sexy.
00:15:20It's stupid.
00:15:21Just screw him.
00:15:22That's what he wants.
00:15:23That's what all guys want.
00:15:25Who hurt you as a child?
00:15:27Oh, Christ.
00:15:28And I have your mouth too.
00:15:30Anyway, what guys want is someone who's sexy, not someone they can just have sex with.
00:15:36You're an idiot.
00:15:37A very smooth, plastic wrapped idiot.
00:15:41Seriously, come on, hurry up.
00:15:47Oh, what a cool bracelet.
00:15:51I love it.
00:15:53Um.
00:15:54You should put that down though because it's like, it's really.
00:15:57Very fragile.
00:15:58Yeah.
00:15:59Okay.
00:16:00Set it down.
00:16:01Hurry up.
00:16:02Okay.
00:16:05Those are your anal beads, right?
00:16:06Yeah.
00:16:07Yeah, I thought so.
00:16:23Hey Tim, what did you do?
00:16:24This part is hot.
00:16:25Whoa.
00:16:26Hold up.
00:16:27Oh, we're going to have some fun.
00:16:28Oh, a tack of the wet T-shirt.
00:16:29It's nice.
00:16:30Haha.
00:16:31Oh, fuck.
00:16:32Come on.
00:16:33Here, come on.
00:16:34Here, come on.
00:16:35Here, come on.
00:16:36Here, come on.
00:16:37Here, come on.
00:16:38Here, come on.
00:16:40Here, come on.
00:16:43Here, here, here.
00:16:44Here, here, here.
00:16:45Here, here, here, here.
00:16:47Happy birthday, Lex.
00:16:49No.
00:16:50No, Joanna, we said no gifts.
00:16:54That is lip poison to plump your lips,
00:16:57but be careful it stings.
00:16:59And the other one is edible massage oil.
00:17:02Oh, how did you know?
00:17:04I'm gonna use both of these tonight.
00:17:12Foster, such a beauty.
00:17:15Please don't touch my service time.
00:17:17All right, sorry.
00:17:19Are you okay now?
00:17:20Yeah, I'm fine.
00:17:21Okay.
00:17:22See you later.
00:17:26I can't believe you haven't heard of it.
00:17:28This is crazy.
00:17:29Jake!
00:17:30Hi!
00:17:31Hey, Ben.
00:17:33Happy birthday.
00:17:36Oh, you didn't have to give me anything.
00:17:39What?
00:17:40You want a beer?
00:17:44No.
00:17:46Oh, hon.
00:17:47Come here.
00:17:48I have your present here.
00:17:49I'll give it to you later.
00:17:50The time's right.
00:17:51Oh.
00:17:52You didn't have to give me anything.
00:17:53And I have a present for you that I want you to unwrap later.
00:17:55Hey, Ralph.
00:17:56We need you to settle this bet over here real quick.
00:17:57We'll bet.
00:17:58All right, this is my man right here.
00:17:59Hey.
00:18:00Hey.
00:18:01How you doing?
00:18:02Hey.
00:18:03Hey.
00:18:04Hey.
00:18:05Hey.
00:18:06How you doing?
00:18:07Hey.
00:18:08Hey.
00:18:09Hey.
00:18:10Hey.
00:18:11Hey.
00:18:12Hey.
00:18:13Hey.
00:18:14Hey.
00:18:15Hey.
00:18:16Hey.
00:18:17Hey.
00:18:18Hey.
00:18:19Hey.
00:18:20Hey.
00:18:21Hey.
00:18:22How you doing?
00:18:23Hey.
00:18:24Hey.
00:18:36Check it out!
00:18:37Dare me.
00:18:46Woo hoo!
00:18:47Oh, dude, look at those.
00:18:55Are those real?
00:18:56Have you guys seen Cheryl?
00:18:58Hey, ah, dude, move!
00:18:59Come on, lame!
00:19:01Oh, all right, okay.
00:19:03I'll see you guys later.
00:19:04Go do some push-ups or something.
00:19:06Aw, the moves.
00:19:0620 bucks says, by the end of the day,
00:19:09I will be motorboating those kitties.
00:19:10Yeah!
00:19:12They're fake anyways.
00:19:14Who cares?
00:19:16Okay.
00:19:19Oh, dude, dude.
00:19:22I'm blind, you fucking asshole.
00:19:28Sue, no, it's your birthday.
00:19:29Here, let me.
00:19:30Joanna, no, just go enjoy the party.
00:19:33What?
00:19:35I win.
00:19:39Hey, do my lips look any plumper?
00:19:41I put this stuff on, but I can't really feel anything yet.
00:19:46Have you guys seen Jake?
00:19:47I haven't seen him anywhere.
00:19:48It just, like, disappeared.
00:19:49It just disappeared.
00:19:53Are these real?
00:20:04Of course they are.
00:20:06All right.
00:20:06I'm just wondering.
00:20:08How come I couldn't have met you before?
00:20:10I don't know.
00:20:10Maybe he's going to be around.
00:20:12Ryan, have you seen Jake?
00:20:13Um, I think he's around or something.
00:20:17Maybe upstairs.
00:20:18I don't know.
00:20:20Maybe he wants to go get my birthday present.
00:20:22That's probably where he went.
00:20:24Oh, well.
00:20:25Liquid Courage?
00:20:30Yeah.
00:20:31Atta girl.
00:20:35Vodka cranberry?
00:20:37Surely simple.
00:20:40Well, I guess it's now or never.
00:20:42I can go meet a ride.
00:20:44Sue?
00:20:45Are you okay?
00:20:46Sue?
00:20:47Relax.
00:20:48They're just nice.
00:20:51Okay, nothing to be scared of.
00:20:53Seriously, you're going to be fine.
00:20:55Is Chris here?
00:21:02Wow, it's even worse in person, isn't it?
00:21:05No, he does not have gay fakes.
00:21:08I'm going to prove it to you.
00:21:10I'm going to do it.
00:21:16Wow, it's even worse in person, isn't it?
00:21:19No, he does not have gay fakes.
00:21:22I'm going to prove it to you.
00:21:24I'm going to do it.
00:21:25I'm going to do this.
00:21:27Good luck.
00:21:30Hey, you can do this.
00:21:33Just act like a slut.
00:21:37Just pretend you're Lex.
00:21:40Now, my favorite chapter is Psalm Galore.
00:21:51Chris.
00:21:53Hi.
00:21:54Can I talk to you?
00:21:56Uh-huh.
00:21:57Uh, in private?
00:21:59No.
00:22:00Hey, Lexi.
00:22:15Hey, Lexi.
00:22:16What?
00:22:18Chris.
00:22:19You're so sexy.
00:22:21Ever since you played Jesus at camp, I've just...
00:22:26I've known that we were meant to be together.
00:22:29And I really want to...
00:22:32Oh, what are you doing?
00:22:34Is that wrong?
00:22:36Sue, what's gotten into you?
00:22:38Nothing.
00:22:39I'm sorry.
00:22:40I don't know how to do this.
00:22:41Sue.
00:22:42Sue, Sue, Sue, Sue.
00:22:47I understand these urges.
00:22:52And, you know, I like you too.
00:22:56Really?
00:22:57You do?
00:22:58I do.
00:22:59I really do.
00:23:01I like you too.
00:23:03Really?
00:23:04You do?
00:23:05I do.
00:23:06I really do.
00:23:07It's just...
00:23:08I've devoted a lot of my life to one certain man.
00:23:15Right.
00:23:16Lexi said you were...
00:23:17Jesus.
00:23:18Oh.
00:23:20Batman.
00:23:21Of course.
00:23:22What did you think?
00:23:23Oh, nothing.
00:23:25So we can still do this then?
00:23:28Oh, Sue.
00:23:30You know, for me,
00:23:34when I think about that man
00:23:37who died for our sins,
00:23:40when I think about him
00:23:41up there on that cross,
00:23:44so helpless,
00:23:45yet so...
00:23:47muscular,
00:23:49with his strong
00:23:50thighs
00:23:52crossed over each other
00:23:54so delicately
00:23:57beneath that ragged
00:23:59loincloth
00:24:00growing so hot,
00:24:04so sweaty,
00:24:05under that hot,
00:24:07hot sun.
00:24:09I just feel such
00:24:10compassion.
00:24:13I think about those things, too.
00:24:15So you understand
00:24:16why I can't do this?
00:24:19Not really.
00:24:21I just find it too hard.
00:24:23It is
00:24:23to
00:24:24give in to carnal pleasure
00:24:27when
00:24:28he sacrificed so much for us.
00:24:31I just...
00:24:31so...
00:24:43I'm going to go out there, right?
00:24:45Andy, we're going to tell you
00:24:46throw these on.
00:24:47Hey, Ty.
00:24:48Whoa!
00:24:50Have you seen Jake?
00:24:51Uh, no.
00:24:53No.
00:24:54All right.
00:24:54focus, focus, focus.
00:25:06Oh, there he is.
00:25:11Oh, he got me
00:25:12the puppy that I wanted.
00:25:13How could he?
00:25:33Sue, what happened?
00:25:35Did you guys do it?
00:25:36Sue?
00:25:38He doesn't want me.
00:25:39Because he's gay.
00:25:41No, he's not.
00:25:43He just really loves Jesus.
00:25:45Oh, come on, Sue.
00:25:47The only reason
00:25:48you even liked him
00:25:49is because you knew
00:25:50he was never
00:25:50a real possibility for you.
00:25:52Look,
00:25:53the only way
00:25:54you are going to find out
00:25:56what kind of man
00:25:56you really want
00:25:57is to know
00:25:58what kind of woman
00:25:59you really are
00:26:00deep inside.
00:26:03What?
00:26:04Come with me.
00:26:05Where?
00:26:06To meet your dark side.
00:26:09Where?
00:26:10To meet your dark side.
00:26:11Leave her.
00:26:15Out.
00:26:17Everyone out.
00:26:27Sue,
00:26:28it's time
00:26:29for you and your vagina
00:26:31to meet face to face.
00:26:33I really can't.
00:26:46I really don't think
00:26:47I can do this.
00:26:49I'm not letting you out
00:26:50until you look.
00:26:55I'm not letting you out
00:26:56until you look.
00:27:00Sue?
00:27:01Can you see it?
00:27:05Sue?
00:27:08I'm almost...
00:27:10I'm almost there.
00:27:15Oh!
00:27:17What?
00:27:19What?
00:27:20Sue, what happened?
00:27:21What did you see?
00:27:23A raccoon?
00:27:25What?
00:27:26You overshot it.
00:27:28Aim the mirror further up.
00:27:29I can't.
00:27:38Please don't make me
00:27:39do that again.
00:27:39Okay, fine.
00:27:41Fine.
00:27:42I didn't want to do this,
00:27:44but you leave me no choice.
00:27:46What?
00:27:47You really need an orgasm.
00:27:50Honestly,
00:27:50I don't know
00:27:51how you expected
00:27:52to ever have sex
00:27:53with someone else
00:27:53when you've never even
00:27:54had it with yourself.
00:27:56This really has to be
00:27:57your first step.
00:27:57Lex,
00:27:59I'm waiting.
00:28:00Coming.
00:28:01Sue,
00:28:01my black vibrator
00:28:02is somewhere
00:28:03in the top drawer.
00:28:03Just find it
00:28:04and use it.
00:28:06Wait,
00:28:07what does the black
00:28:07vibrator look like?
00:28:08It's black.
00:28:10It vibrates.
00:28:13Come on, Rod.
00:28:14Let's go to Sue's room.
00:28:16And don't come back
00:28:18until you have
00:28:19at least one orgasm.
00:28:32Hey, cutie!
00:28:34Cutie!
00:28:38Oh!
00:28:40Boozeye!
00:28:40Oh, yeah!
00:28:46Bang.
00:28:47Bang.
00:28:48Bang.
00:28:49Bang.
00:28:51Good boy.
00:28:51Straighten up.
00:28:53Good boy.
00:28:54Good boy.
00:28:56He knows over
00:28:57a hundred commands.
00:28:59I'm sorry.
00:29:00I can't see anything.
00:29:02That is not funny, Cheryl.
00:29:04What a bitch.
00:29:06Fortunately,
00:29:07when you're blind,
00:29:08you get used
00:29:08to things like that.
00:29:28Oh!
00:29:29Oh!
00:29:37Oh, shit!
00:29:45What's wrong with this thing?
00:30:07What is wrong?
00:30:09Lexi, it's Jake.
00:30:11He was getting a blowjob by some pink-haired girl.
00:30:15For sure?
00:30:17I mean, I know I've been putting off having sex with him,
00:30:19so maybe it's my fault.
00:30:21That's no excuse. He's a dirtbag. How dare he?
00:30:25No, it's awful.
00:30:27I mean, I thought I was gonna marry him.
00:30:31It's a text. It's from him.
00:30:37Um, I can't bear myself to read it.
00:30:39Okay.
00:30:40Uh, he's looking for you.
00:30:42He wants to give you your birthday gift.
00:30:44Oh, I can't face him.
00:30:46Um, I have to go. I'm going.
00:30:48No, you can't just leave.
00:30:50Well, I can't stay and just pretend like nothing happened.
00:30:54I mean, maybe I should confront him.
00:30:56No.
00:30:57He'll either deny it or admit and promise never to do it again.
00:31:00Either way, it's bullshit.
00:31:02I see only one option.
00:31:05I'm leaving.
00:31:06Revenge sex.
00:31:08Re- I mean, what? What does that even mean?
00:31:10It means you find a guy, you screw his brains out, and you let Jake catch you.
00:31:17Revenge sex.
00:31:19Re- I mean, what? What does that even mean?
00:31:21It means you find a guy, you screw his brains out, and you let Jake catch you.
00:31:27But he- I mean, he doesn't even care.
00:31:29He doesn't even care about me. I mean, why would- he's just into other girls.
00:31:33Trust me, he'll care.
00:31:35Seriously, this is the worst thing you can do to him.
00:31:38To his ego.
00:31:39To screw someone else when you've never even had sex with him.
00:31:43Especially if it's with someone smarter, better looking, and with a bigger dick.
00:31:48No, I- I couldn't. Plus, I mean, there's- there's no one smarter and better looking.
00:31:56Eric! He's perfect!
00:31:58Eric Hall? Are you kidding?
00:32:01I mean, he wouldn't even be into me. He likes your type.
00:32:04Really? And what type is that?
00:32:06Sweaty.
00:32:07Yeah.
00:32:08Trust me, he's amazing. I fooled around with him once. He has this great tongue ring.
00:32:13Oh, no. I could never fool around with somebody you fooled around with.
00:32:18Okay, then. Fine. We will find someone else. Someone that I haven't fooled around with.
00:32:25Okay, what does it matter that I fooled around with him? I mean, it's- you're not gonna marry the guy.
00:32:33Mmm, no. I just couldn't do it. Fine. If you want to live the rest of your life knowing that you had one chance to do the right thing,
00:32:42to make your boyfriend feel like a total, worthless piece of garbage, and possibly even scar him with the rest of his existence,
00:32:48and you chose not to do it, go ahead. But honestly, I don't know how you'll be able to live with yourself.
00:32:54I don't know.
00:32:57But honestly, I don't know how you'll be able to live with yourself.
00:33:02I don't know.
00:33:05Trust me. It's going to work.
00:33:14I will intercept Jake and get him upstairs.
00:33:17Hi, Cheryl.
00:33:19Okay, enough to chat with her.
00:33:21Oh, no.
00:33:32Hey.
00:33:33Happy birthday.
00:33:34Thanks.
00:33:36Happy birthday.
00:33:37Thanks.
00:33:38Thanks.
00:34:03Have you guys seen Jake?
00:34:09So...
00:34:12Happy birthday.
00:34:15Uh, do you know that most people think that the happy birthday song was from Britain?
00:34:20But it's actually from us. U.S.
00:34:23America?
00:34:26United States?
00:34:28I know where we live.
00:34:29Right.
00:34:31Of course.
00:34:35I know where we live.
00:34:36Right.
00:34:38Of course.
00:34:43Hey, Jesus, Eric, are you gonna make your move or not?
00:34:46Oh, you want me to move?
00:34:47Yeah, no, I can totally move. I just...
00:34:49No, you're fine.
00:34:51I'm fine.
00:35:04Jake!
00:35:08So, Eric, do you want to do it or not?
00:35:10Oh, I'm sorry. It? What, um...
00:35:15It. Like monkey boning and, like, pigs in a blanket get real nasty.
00:35:22Oh! Oh, you mean like, uh, right now?
00:35:27Right now?
00:35:28I mean, well, yeah. You know, the sooner the better.
00:35:33Yeah, sure. I mean, well, yeah, of course. Um, I just never realized that you...
00:35:39I mean...
00:35:42Whew. Uh...
00:35:45It's just...
00:35:48You're so...
00:35:50You're so beautiful.
00:35:52Okay. Um...
00:35:53Hmm?
00:35:55Uh, no cuisine.
00:35:57Right. Um, of course. Sorry.
00:36:03So, um...
00:36:06Do you wanna unwrap me?
00:36:09Oh, wow. Uh, you're wrapped up like a Hot Pocket or leftover macaroni and cheese.
00:36:15Now that you're left over, you're not.
00:36:17Uh, you're fresh.
00:36:22Now that you're left over, you're not.
00:36:24Uh, you're fresh.
00:36:26Organic.
00:36:28Yep.
00:36:31So, the wrap.
00:36:33Right.
00:36:35Um...
00:36:37Where's the, uh...
00:36:39Oh, yeah, here it is.
00:36:41I see it. Um, let me just, uh...
00:36:45Ow. Ow. Ow.
00:36:47Oh, sorry. Sorry. Sorry. I, um...
00:36:49It's... It's okay. Here.
00:36:51Do it again.
00:36:53Sorry, I, uh...
00:36:55I bite my nails, so it's a little difficult to...
00:36:57You know what? Let me just lay on the bed.
00:37:00Okay.
00:37:06Uh...
00:37:08Let me just see.
00:37:10Oh, here it is. I got it.
00:37:11All right. Just, um, pull it.
00:37:14Oh, let me just...
00:37:16Ah!
00:37:18Oh, geez. Uh, Cheryl, are you...
00:37:21You okay?
00:37:22Help! Help!
00:37:24Uh...
00:37:26Hey, Cheryl, are you okay?
00:37:28Oh, geez.
00:37:30Uh...
00:37:31Uh...
00:37:32Uh...
00:37:33Uh...
00:37:34Uh...
00:37:36Uh...
00:37:38Well, that was stupid.
00:37:40Uh...
00:37:42Yeah.
00:37:43Uh...
00:37:48How you doing tonight?
00:37:49I'm good.
00:37:50You having a good time?
00:37:51Yeah?
00:37:52You good?
00:37:53Jake!
00:37:54I think I saw Cheryl upstairs.
00:37:56What?
00:37:58I can't hear you.
00:38:00I didn't have a beer.
00:38:02Chips are so damn salty.
00:38:03Jake!
00:38:04Up...
00:38:05Stairs.
00:38:06Yeah.
00:38:07Hold on.
00:38:08Take a piss.
00:38:09How much beer?
00:38:10How much beer?
00:38:26Ah!
00:38:27Ah!
00:38:28Ah!
00:38:31Ah!
00:38:33Ah!
00:38:34Ah!
00:38:42Finally.
00:38:43I, uh...
00:38:45Let me just get the blinds.
00:38:46Oh, no, no, no.
00:38:47No, no, no.
00:38:48Um...
00:38:49Don't... Don't worry about it.
00:38:50What?
00:38:52I mean, I want us to be able to see each other.
00:38:57Oh.
00:38:59Well, okay.
00:39:00Okay.
00:39:04Okay.
00:39:05Okay.
00:39:06Okay.
00:39:07Okay.
00:39:08Let me just get the blinds.
00:39:09Oh, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.
00:39:10Um...
00:39:11Don't... Don't worry about it.
00:39:12What?
00:39:13I mean, I want us to be able to see each other.
00:39:14Uh-oh.
00:39:15Well, okay.
00:39:16Okay.
00:39:17Okay.
00:39:18Okay.
00:39:19Uh-oh.
00:39:20Okay.
00:39:21Okay.
00:39:22Okay.
00:39:23I mean, I want us to be able to see each other.
00:39:26Uh-oh.
00:39:27Well, okay.
00:39:28Okay.
00:39:29Uh-oh. Well, okay.
00:39:34Okay.
00:39:59What are you doing?
00:40:25Uh, I think it's time, you know, to do it.
00:40:33Um, not yet. More foreplay.
00:40:36Huh? Oh.
00:40:44It's so good.
00:40:47Oh.
00:40:49Yep.
00:40:50Ow, I draw. Draw, draw, draw.
00:40:54What, what, what?
00:40:55Ah, ah, oh.
00:40:57Ah, yeah.
00:40:59Lockjaw, lockjaw.
00:41:01Is that even a thing?
00:41:03I don't know.
00:41:05Ah.
00:41:07Are you okay?
00:41:09No, no, no, no. It's, uh, it's fine.
00:41:14I'm just, uh, embarrassed. I, it's probably TMJ or fracture, swollen.
00:41:23Are you sure you're okay?
00:41:25Yeah, yeah, I'm fine.
00:41:27Okay, great. Have fun.
00:41:29Oh.
00:41:31Uh, now. Now. Let's do it now.
00:41:36No, not yet. Not yet.
00:41:38All right, I'm gonna come. I'm gonna come.
00:41:40Are you ready?
00:41:41No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.
00:41:44No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.
00:41:46No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.
00:42:13Uh-oh.
00:42:16Oh, hey, Jake.
00:42:19How you doing?
00:42:21How's it going?
00:42:22Good.
00:42:23Eric?
00:42:25Come on.
00:42:26Eric, help me.
00:42:27I'm glad I can't see anything.
00:42:30Excuse me.
00:42:34Cheryl's in here.
00:42:41Sup, bruh?
00:42:42What the fuck is...
00:42:45Hey, wait!
00:42:48Lex, babe, still waiting.
00:42:57Oh, I'm sorry. I can't see. I'm blind.
00:43:02Damn it.
00:43:03I'm gonna save somebody to that bitch.
00:43:06Hey, you!
00:43:08You better stop making fun of the blind
00:43:10or I'm gonna teach you a lesson.
00:43:16I'm so sorry!
00:43:17I'll never make fun of the blind again.
00:43:19Ah!
00:43:20I'm so sorry.
00:43:21I can't crash you fast.
00:43:22I can't crash you fast.
00:43:23I can't see you in the blind.
00:43:24I can't see you in the blind.
00:43:25I'm so sorry.
00:43:26I'm so sorry.
00:43:27I'm so sorry, I'm so sorry.
00:43:28I can't see you in the blind.
00:43:29Oh, man.
00:43:30No more water balloons.
00:43:31Oh, man, no more water balloons.
00:43:48This party's ass.
00:43:52Yeah!
00:43:57This just isn't working.
00:43:58Nothing.
00:44:00What's the big deal about these vibrators, anyway?
00:44:05Be careful, man.
00:44:07The lock sticks.
00:44:08Spark it up!
00:44:10Yes!
00:44:14Oh, man!
00:44:16I love this game!
00:44:17We're going to get controllers.
00:44:18We've got to play.
00:44:19Here, here, here.
00:44:20Okay, let me find another one.
00:44:24Whoo!
00:44:26Whoa!
00:44:27Look at this!
00:44:28Oh, my God!
00:44:30Pew, pew, pew!
00:44:31Whoa, man!
00:44:32Get that thing away!
00:44:33Jesus!
00:44:38Aw.
00:44:42Hey, dude.
00:44:43Nice shot.
00:44:45Wasn't me.
00:44:46Whoa!
00:44:47Whoa!
00:44:48Whoa!
00:44:49Nice!
00:44:50Are you sitting there or something?
00:44:51Hey, you found the grenade launcher.
00:44:52Nice!
00:44:53Nice!
00:44:54Do you have the extra controller?
00:44:57No.
00:44:58What?
00:44:59Oh!
00:45:00Hopefully, you found the grenade launcher.
00:45:03Hey!
00:45:04Do you have the extra controller?
00:45:07No, yeah.
00:45:08Do you have the extra controller?
00:45:27Whoa!
00:45:30You are the controller.
00:45:32No, I just...
00:45:33I didn't.
00:45:35I swear.
00:45:36I...
00:45:46All right.
00:45:47All right.
00:45:48Hey.
00:45:49Hey, Sue.
00:45:50What are you doing, man?
00:45:54It's okay.
00:45:55Hey, Sue.
00:45:56Didn't you hear me calling you?
00:45:57Yeah.
00:45:58I just needed to...
00:45:59Um...
00:46:00Oh, sure.
00:46:01Listen, Sue, I was rethinking what I said earlier.
00:46:06You were?
00:46:07You mean...
00:46:08Yeah.
00:46:09Yeah.
00:46:10I just needed to...
00:46:11Um...
00:46:12Oh, sure.
00:46:13Listen, Sue, I...
00:46:14I was rethinking what I said earlier.
00:46:16You were?
00:46:17You mean...
00:46:18Yeah.
00:46:19Yeah.
00:46:20Yeah.
00:46:21So you think we should give it a try?
00:46:26Could we go get a drink?
00:46:27Wow.
00:46:28Um...
00:46:29Your toilet's really...
00:46:30Oh, you...
00:46:31You know what?
00:46:32I...
00:46:33I gotta go.
00:46:34Um...
00:46:35Happy birthday.
00:46:36Uh, no, Chris.
00:46:37No, there wasn't...
00:46:38I didn't...
00:46:39Oh, God.
00:46:40Never mind.
00:46:41This was the worst idea ever.
00:46:42Never going to have sex.
00:46:43Ow.
00:47:31Hello?
00:47:32A little attention here.
00:47:34Oh, yeah.
00:47:35Sorry.
00:47:41Lex, don't be selfish.
00:47:44All right. Sorry.
00:47:58Oh, jeez.
00:48:02Who invented this stupid position anyway?
00:48:05Too much fucking multitasking.
00:48:08Screw it.
00:48:11Oh, jeez.
00:48:41Oh, jeez.
00:48:43Oh, jeez.
00:48:44Oh, jeez.
00:48:45Oh, jeez.
00:48:46Oh, jeez.
00:48:48Oh.
00:48:49Oh.
00:48:50Oh.
00:48:51No.
00:48:52That was bad.
00:48:54That was so bad.
00:48:57Oh.
00:48:59Oh.
00:49:00Oh.
00:49:04Oh, jeez.
00:49:06Oh.
00:49:08Oh.
00:49:09Oh.
00:49:10Oh.
00:49:11Oh.
00:49:12Oh.
00:49:13JJ I think that guy's name starts with a J
00:49:22Hey
00:49:24Soon I'm start with the J
00:49:27Yes, it does so you're JJ
00:49:43Hello, welcome to one nine hundred confess would you like a priest or a nun today a nun please punch in your credit card number
00:50:10Please hold
00:50:13One nine hundred confession. How may I be of service? It's been one day since my last confession
00:50:22I accused myself of the following sins one day
00:50:34I would have come this morning, but it's my 18th birthday go on
00:50:38uh, okay, well, I've been touching myself
00:50:43inappropriately well actually I
00:50:46What's your problem a washing machine touched her?
00:50:53You know I sat on a washing machine and well
00:50:55All right freak time's up what but what do I do just unplug the thing no, but but I think I might have had an
00:51:04Orgasm well then be happy you found the perfect man. I'm serious. Look honey. You seem like a nice young lady, so
00:51:14I'll tell you this
00:51:16Masturbation isn't a sin
00:51:20No conditions
00:51:22You broke no covenant with God. It's not in the Bible
00:51:25So the washing machine could touch me anytime like morning afternoon night
00:51:33Yes, and other things can touch you
00:51:36Accidental masturbation is not a sin neither is intentional masturbation
00:51:43God's pretty cool that way he sure is now run along
00:51:47How do you know all that because I'm a nun now eat my pussy bitch
00:52:00Accidental masturbation
00:52:13Revenge sex
00:52:17I'm getting out of here
00:52:21Yeah, I admit it
00:52:23I've got no game
00:52:31Fucking douchebag
00:52:35Now I have to get laid if it's the last thing I do you go girl
00:52:43What are you doing here?
00:52:45We needed someplace private
00:52:47But hey listen if you're serious about getting laid
00:52:50Yeah, if you want someone great. I mean really the best ever
00:52:57No offense
00:52:59Frank the blind guy
00:53:02Really?
00:53:03I'm telling you he's amazing
00:53:05I had food sex with him a few weeks ago. It was like nothing I've ever experienced before
00:53:13It was like we used all our senses
00:53:16Everything
00:53:18If you're interested in
00:53:20I'll set it up
00:53:21I'll set it up
00:53:22All right
00:53:30What about him?
00:53:31Jeremy
00:53:32Jeremy
00:53:33Oh yeah, I know Jeremy
00:53:35Hey, I think I fooled around with him once
00:53:37I didn't know his last name though
00:53:41It's Jones
00:53:42Jeremy Jones
00:53:43This all makes sense
00:53:46Excuse me
00:53:47Jeremy
00:53:49Hi
00:53:50Hey
00:53:51Who's on the phone?
00:53:52Who's on the phone?
00:53:53Oh, that's my new girlfriend
00:53:54Oh, that's my new girlfriend
00:53:55You'll meet her
00:53:56She'll be here in like an hour
00:53:58Wait, you have a girlfriend?
00:54:00I don't know
00:54:15Oh, hi
00:54:16Hey Frank
00:54:17Sit
00:54:22Oh, you meant
00:54:24You meant the dog
00:54:27Relax
00:54:30You need to relax and calm down
00:54:42Oh, I'm relaxed, I'm fine
00:54:45Why are you biting your nail?
00:54:47I'm not
00:54:51How did you know that?
00:54:55Corner
00:54:56Sit
00:55:02Roll over
00:55:06Oh, you mean me
00:55:10Roll over
00:55:14Oh, you mean me
00:55:16Oh, how do you...
00:55:18How do you want me to...
00:55:20Just lay down
00:55:21Okay
00:55:33Oh, oh...
00:55:34I shouldn't even be doing this but...
00:55:37Considering it a teachable moment
00:55:39Okay
00:55:43Oh
00:55:44See me with your hands
00:55:47See me with your hands
00:55:52All right
00:55:53Uh...
00:56:01You know, I should really...
00:56:02I have a boyfriend and I shouldn't be doing this
00:56:04Really...
00:56:06Oh...
00:56:19Mmm, peanut butter
00:56:20Oh, peanut butter
00:56:37Frank, Frank
00:56:39Oh...
00:56:43Oh, Frank
00:56:50Oh...
00:56:51olmas
00:56:53Set
00:56:55I'm gonna get a 10
00:56:57For peace
00:56:58No, mobos
00:57:00Live in the life
00:57:02With событи cause of our families
00:57:03And my allies
00:57:04Took me out, but
00:57:06All...
00:57:08Back hogs
00:57:10Oh man
00:57:12Yourself
00:57:14You know that
00:57:15Who, no?
00:57:16ca fig...
00:57:18You know that
00:57:19my chips guys why are you making such a mess sorry
00:57:26it's just a case of accidental masturbation that's all
00:57:38let me do this go away
00:57:44I'm not I'm not it no really please I want to help
00:57:51okay everybody out leave I have to vacuum
00:58:09you're not even getting the chips they're over here
00:58:13I see some dust over here so
00:58:20there's so much dust on this floor
00:58:23this is a dirty floor such a dirty dirty floor
00:58:30of course
00:58:37oh
00:58:40okay
00:58:50oh
00:58:51oh
00:58:52alright
00:58:53oh
00:58:54I think I got all that I'm just going to see how
00:59:01oh
00:59:02oh
00:59:03oh
00:59:04oh
00:59:05oh
00:59:07oh
00:59:08here's my chest
00:59:09Frankie
00:59:10oh my oh
00:59:11what was that
00:59:12oh
00:59:13what
00:59:14ah
00:59:15fucking shit
00:59:16oh man we gotta smoke
00:59:17oh we can smoke in here
00:59:19stop
00:59:21Frank
00:59:22stop teasing Frank
00:59:23oh
00:59:25oh
00:59:26sorry man we're just looking for a place to finish this road
00:59:29oh I heard something
00:59:30you wanna join us
00:59:31you wanna join us
00:59:32uh
00:59:33no I might
00:59:34come on you gotta do it come on
00:59:36seriously guys I need to go back
00:59:37what's your dog man
00:59:38dude what's it like being blinded but it's tripping
00:59:40oh
00:59:41oh
00:59:45Frank
00:59:46Frank
00:59:47Frank are we gonna do something soon
00:59:49bro you are too funny
00:59:55thanks man
00:59:57oh this is some good stuff
00:59:59I haven't smoked since junior high
01:00:01dude I haven't stopped smoking since junior high
01:00:04wait wait wait
01:00:05I feel like I was supposed to be doing something
01:00:10damn I really can't remember this this is some good shit
01:00:33oh no
01:00:34you're the devil
01:00:36no more
01:00:40JJ
01:00:41I'm Jeremy
01:00:42you have to remember that amazing time we had together don't you
01:00:47please
01:00:48Lex
01:00:49I can't
01:00:50I mean I got a girlfriend I really like this girl
01:00:54fine
01:00:55it's just so sad
01:00:57because I'm wearing this
01:00:59coupless bra
01:01:01and I also have on crotchless panties
01:01:04with just a little string of pearl in front for extra stimulation
01:01:11oh
01:01:15ah
01:01:16we've got like 30 minutes before she gets here
01:01:18perfect
01:01:24before she gets here
01:01:25perfect
01:01:37oh yeah
01:01:38do it
01:01:39let's do it
01:01:40fuck me
01:01:41fuck me now
01:01:46what?
01:01:47what's wrong?
01:01:48I can't
01:01:49I can't
01:01:50I can't get it in
01:01:51just try down there
01:01:52it's like
01:01:53desert down there
01:01:54it's
01:01:55sandpaper
01:01:56I just
01:01:57okay I get the picture
01:01:58just try it again
01:02:00no
01:02:03why is this happening?
01:02:05we fooled around before
01:02:07I
01:02:08I was dripping wet
01:02:09I came like four times remember?
01:02:11just do what you did then
01:02:12go on
01:02:13I already did my thing
01:02:14I already tried
01:02:18what?
01:02:19what is different this time?
01:02:21I don't know
01:02:23last time
01:02:27I honestly don't even know what you're talking about
01:02:29what?
01:02:31you're not JJ?
01:02:34but your name is Jeremy Jones
01:02:36how can you not be JJ?
01:02:38who the hell is this JJ?
01:02:42where are you going?
01:02:43we're not done here
01:02:44we're not done here
01:02:45I can still do this
01:02:46I just need a little bit of fun
01:02:47I can do this
01:02:48I don't need JJ
01:02:50I don't need anyone else
01:02:51we can do this
01:02:54go team
01:02:59what?
01:03:00just keep going
01:03:06shit
01:03:07where's Jeremy?
01:03:20we were just
01:03:22you know from here
01:03:24hey babe
01:03:25just working out
01:03:26it's working out
01:03:31how could you
01:03:32you bastard
01:03:37you might wanna
01:03:38what?
01:03:40what?
01:03:45Mariela!
01:03:47Mariela!
01:03:49you know those aren't mine
01:03:51at least not all of them
01:03:53what is wrong with you?
01:04:00what is wrong with you?
01:04:03you used to be so pure
01:04:05well no more
01:04:06that's it
01:04:07really
01:04:08that's the last one
01:04:09yep
01:04:10man
01:04:13no
01:04:23no
01:04:24yes
01:04:25Cheryl? What is it? What are you doing down here?
01:04:51I'm waiting for everyone to leave so I can sneak out and get far, far away from here.
01:04:56What? Why? Nothing. Just this blind guy and his dog and...
01:05:02Honey, it's gonna be okay. No, it's not okay. God. And you know whose fault it is?
01:05:11I'm sorry. It's Jake's. Jake's fault. That blind cheating bastard.
01:05:17Yes. He is such a dickwad. You need to confront him.
01:05:21Yeah. Yeah, I need to confront him. I mean, it's my birthday and where is he anyway?
01:05:27Like, why isn't he hanging out with me?
01:05:29You know, you just call him here and give him a big piece of your mind.
01:05:33Yeah, a big piece. A big old chunk of my mind. A big piece of it.
01:05:38Yeah. You know, you might wanna...
01:05:42You need to look hot while you break up with him. Yeah, you're right.
01:05:46Why am I wearing a sheet? I know.
01:05:55I'm sorry. I just, uh...
01:05:58I get shy around beautiful women like you.
01:06:04I got no game.
01:06:05I got no game.
01:06:13It's not important.
01:06:14Hey, um...
01:06:27Eric, I can't talk right now.
01:06:29No, no, no. I really need to talk to you.
01:06:31Really, Eric, I can't right now, so...
01:06:33No, no, no. I just wanted to say I'm sorry about earlier and I'm just embarrassed and I wanna make it up to you.
01:06:41Eric, really? I don't care. It's fine.
01:06:44No, but I do. I mean, I do. I care.
01:06:48I haven't known how to tell you. Maybe because, uh, I don't know, I'm a little shy.
01:06:55But I was wondering or hoping that we could go out sometime. Soon.
01:07:03Because I'm gonna be leaving for a little while and it would be nice to go out.
01:07:07Really? Eric, you're shy. You have no game.
01:07:11Well, no. Not really.
01:07:16Yeah, no. I can't do this. Sorry.
01:07:22Okay. Alright.
01:07:24I, uh...
01:07:27Happy birthday, then.
01:07:28Happy birthday, then.
01:07:40I'm sorry. I was trying to kiss you.
01:07:43Happy birthday, then.
01:07:52I'm sorry.
01:08:05Here I come, baby. Get ready for your big birthday surprise.
01:08:09surprise oh stop um we can't do this oh god damn it not again oh no honey happy
01:08:23what is this who the hell are you dude okay guys don't
01:08:28oh baby what is this oh gee share here i've been looking for you all night and you've been
01:08:42oh man no wonder i couldn't find you you couldn't find me what about all those girls vaginas you
01:08:49were in or your penis getting sucked so honey no you can work this out baby i love you
01:08:57jake no you have to go baby i'll be faithful from now on please i promise no jake i can't do this i'm
01:09:03sorry no jake please just go i'm sorry you're a harmless
01:09:15you did it i'm so proud of you you got your revenge sex you left him a mere shell of a man revenge sex
01:09:22it's really not what it sounds like at all right
01:09:30all makes sense now wow i feel really stupid eric i'm really i'm really sorry
01:09:39cheryl i really liked you and you used me eric please don't go please eric
01:09:46aren't you happy well no that's not exactly how it's supposed to feel like
01:09:55you mean the sex was it yeah no we didn't quite do it oh you know i couldn't seem to do it either
01:10:04i just never found the right guy or guys anyway we better get downstairs people are starting to leave
01:10:11i wonder how sue did
01:10:26i can't believe she dumped me man this is
01:10:28bullshit
01:10:29god
01:10:33dude suck it
01:10:36god i'm out of here yeah he has good hair though
01:10:47don't keep my car either
01:10:58Take this information through your head.
01:11:02Oh, Sue, are you all right?
01:11:06Was it from sex?
01:11:08Did you pop your cork?
01:11:09I don't think so.
01:11:10Not with the guy, anyway.
01:11:13Oh, don't ask.
01:11:14Every possible object.
01:11:17It's like every mechanical thing.
01:11:18It was like transformers.
01:11:21They just all became vibrators.
01:11:23I told you.
01:11:25It's addicting.
01:11:26So what about Chris?
01:11:30Well, last time I saw him, he was running away through dear life.
01:11:32I told you he was gay.
01:11:34Well, I think I'm just all cramp.
01:11:40Oh, I think it's broken.
01:11:42So wait.
01:11:44None of us cashed an RV card.
01:11:51Oh, Joanna, you're so sweet.
01:11:54So let's now go grab some food.
01:11:56You want to go?
01:11:57No.
01:11:59I think I should finish up here.
01:12:02Did you ever find that guy you were looking for?
01:12:04No.
01:12:06I don't know.
01:12:07For some reason, I just realized he needs to be my first.
01:12:11Or something.
01:12:13Why?
01:12:13Why do you know him?
01:12:15Sort of.
01:12:16Oh.
01:12:17Well, hey, if you happen to run into him, just tell him I'd like to see him again.
01:12:28Love him?
01:12:29Shut it.
01:12:30You want to do it?
01:12:30I don't want to hear it from you.
01:12:31I don't want to get married.
01:12:32You want to do it?
01:12:33I don't want to hear it from you.
01:12:33I don't want to get married.
01:12:34I don't want to do it.
01:12:35I don't want to get married.
01:12:37Um, no.
01:13:04No way.
01:13:07Oh, well.
01:13:24There's always next year.
01:13:34It's you.
01:13:49I've been waiting for you, JJ.
01:13:53Joanna.
01:13:55Joanna.
01:13:57Joanna.
01:13:59Oh.
01:14:00Oh.
01:14:01Oh.
01:14:02Oh.
01:14:03Oh.
01:14:04Oh.
01:14:05Oh.
01:14:06Oh.
01:14:07Oh.
01:14:08Oh.
01:14:09Oh.
01:14:10Oh.
01:14:11Oh.
01:14:12Oh.
01:14:13Oh.
01:14:14Oh.
01:14:15Oh.
01:14:16Oh.
01:14:17Oh.
01:14:18Oh.
01:14:19Oh.
01:14:20Oh.
01:14:21Oh.
01:14:22Oh.
01:14:23Oh.
01:14:24Oh.
01:14:25Oh.
01:14:26Oh.
01:14:27Oh.
01:14:28Oh.
01:14:29Oh.
01:15:00Wow, that's amazing.
01:15:08Yeah, I didn't know I had it in me.
01:15:12I guess something inspired me.
01:15:15You really captured his expression in his eyes.
01:15:19Yeah, even that little callic he has in his hair.
01:15:25Who's?
01:15:26Eric's.
01:15:27Well, it's him, right?
01:15:31Oh.
01:15:33Yeah.
01:15:35I have to go see him.
01:15:41Well, I think you know what we should do.
01:15:43One-nine-hundred, confess.
01:15:58Sister Therese?
01:15:59Yeah, hon, there was a problem with your credit card.
01:16:04I just need the last three numbers in the back.
01:16:07Oh, sure.
01:16:09It's 271.
01:16:12Sister, I know this isn't a confession, but can I ask your opinion on something?
01:16:17Do you think if you do something bad that God will forgive you, take you back?
01:16:24Sure, hon.
01:16:25Why not?
01:16:26As long as you're on the right path.
01:16:30Well, how do you know if you're on that path?
01:16:32I always look for some kind of sign from the universe.
01:16:37Something to let me know that it's all going to be okay.
01:16:41Sister, can I get up now?
01:16:45I really got to pee.
01:16:46No!
01:16:47Hush your trap!
01:16:48Okay, honey, I really need to get back to work, but call back any time.
01:16:55I will.
01:16:57Thanks.
01:17:01Sister?
01:17:02Shut up or I'll punish you hard, you sheep fucker!
01:17:05Mom!
01:17:18Eric, wait!
01:17:26Cheryl?
01:17:29Eric, um, look, I am so sorry about everything.
01:17:36I was trying to have revenge sex with you.
01:17:38At the beginning, but then at the end, I wasn't.
01:17:42I just didn't want to do that with you.
01:17:45The revenge part, not the sex part.
01:17:48Um, I, I do want to go out with you.
01:17:54And I didn't realize that until this morning.
01:17:58I mean, you're a completely different guy than Jake is, and he's all over these-
01:18:01Eric!
01:18:04Come on, I gotta get going.
01:18:06Oh, wow.
01:18:08Um, Cheryl, uh, this is my sister Tina.
01:18:12Tina, Cheryl.
01:18:14Hi, nice to meet you.
01:18:18Uh, so, um, do you mind if I call you in a few days, when I get back?
01:18:26Yeah, sure.
01:18:34Oh.
01:18:35Sorry, no kissing, right?
01:18:37No, kissing.
01:18:38Oh.
01:18:39Mmm.
01:18:56Yeah, did you ever, uh, get those flowers I sent you?
01:18:59I don't even care that you hooked up with Lexi.
01:19:05Wait, what? I never did that.
01:19:08I mean, you don't have to lie about it.
01:19:10She told me all about your pierced tongue.
01:19:18She must have me mixed up with someone else.
01:19:21I wonder who it was.
01:19:29At least this birthday is over.
01:19:45Dear Lord, please forgive me.
01:20:02I mean, if you could just, I don't know, like send me a sign.
01:20:15Excuse me. Excuse me.
01:20:41Do you know where the church is?
01:20:44Because it's on Bountain Street.
01:20:46Um, yeah, that's the church I go to.
01:20:48Or used to go to.
01:20:50Um, it's straight up that way and then left.
01:20:55You're more than welcome to come with me if you like.
01:20:59Oh, well, I don't know.
01:21:09Well, that's pretty powerful.
01:21:12Oh, 250 horsepower, 225 pounds of torque.
01:21:17Like I said, you're more than welcome to hop on.
01:21:21I don't think so.
01:21:24But thanks.
01:21:26What's your name?
01:21:27Sue.
01:21:28What's yours?
01:21:29Jesus.
01:21:30Really?
01:21:31See.
01:21:32Maybe I could use the ride.
01:21:37Maybe I could use the ride.
01:21:38Maybe I could use the ride.
01:21:38Maybe I could use the ride.
01:21:39I could use the ride.
01:21:41I could use the ride.
01:21:43Oh, boy.
01:21:44Oh, boy.
01:21:45Oh, boy.
01:21:45See you.
01:21:46Oh, boy.
01:21:47Oh, my God.
01:22:17Oh, my God.
01:22:47Oh, my God.
01:23:17Oh, my God.
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