00:51:28passed down on to them. And I can take care of them. I will take care of them
00:51:35better than a Bachchan. And I'll take care of them so well that they will
00:51:39learn how to take care of themselves without having to rely on things like
00:51:44smokes and supplements. I'll be happy off of natural things that life has to offer.
00:51:52And they'll be better than me. Better off.
00:51:58Kids, huh? Our kids. I have to have kids even if it kills me. I know. You know, the
00:52:17call won't matter anyways, but if you need that validation for yourself, I won't argue
00:52:23any further. It's not that I don't trust you. I know.
00:52:29I know.
00:52:36I know.
00:52:41I don't know.
00:53:11I remember taking the car out towards the Alex Fraser Bridge. It was snowing there, too. Nobody... nobody was there. I knew that I would never be able to move past that. I learned from a story, from a voice that spoke the words that I have been trying to formulate this entire time. It was so true to me.
00:53:41I don't know.
00:53:43I don't know.
00:53:45I don't know.
00:53:47I don't know.
00:53:49I don't know.
00:53:51I don't know.
00:53:53I don't know.
00:53:55I don't know.
00:53:57I don't know.
00:53:59I don't know.
00:54:01I don't know.
00:54:03I don't know.
00:54:05I don't know.
00:54:06I don't know.
00:54:07I don't know.
00:54:08I don't know.
00:54:09I don't know.
00:54:10I don't know.
00:54:11I don't know.
00:54:12That was the worst cashier I have ever met.
00:54:17God, what a shit show of a trip.
00:54:22Sorry?
00:54:24Sorry?
00:54:26Nothing.
00:54:28I'll just die from dealing with people before I die of lung cancer is all.
00:54:32Sorry, what did you say?
00:54:34Nothing.
00:54:40How's the gas in the car?
00:54:44Sorry, what did you say?
00:54:48Is there still gas in the car?
00:54:50I don't know, like 75%?
00:54:54I don't know, go check.
00:54:56No, it's fine.
00:54:58Great.
00:55:00I just felt like I should do the same.
00:55:06You know, I've always wondered why we imitate each other's actions.
00:55:20Like, I always feel the need to do so physically.
00:55:26And deep down, I don't want to psychologically.
00:55:30Unless I want something from that person.
00:55:46Unless I want something from that person.
00:55:56Like, for them to like me or better love me.
00:56:04Want to be around me and feel as if I am a mirror.
00:56:16But, I guess that's the way to get them to leave you, right?
00:56:22Because in the mirror, one can only see one's flaws.
00:56:34It's like the linings they smoke away in the first place.
00:56:38It's absurd to want to reflect someone else through actions then, don't you think?
00:57:02Like, why would somebody want to see themselves in another person when it is the one thing they are trying to avoid by living through others?
00:57:12One should never try to imitate another unless it is true.
00:57:16Otherwise, they risk losing it all with that effort in the first place.
00:57:20It all seems pointless to try to change things now.
00:57:24And that is why all hope lies in our children.
00:57:30They hold the future.
00:57:32They will fix all of this.
00:57:50I'm sure everyone hates me now.
00:58:04Who wouldn't?
00:58:10Perhaps no human has the capability to say how they feel out loud.
00:58:18Perhaps I should talk to her.
00:58:22To say that it wasn't indeed me at the time.
00:58:28That something had overtaken me.
00:58:32An emotion.
00:58:36A wave of thought.
00:58:38The devil itself.
00:58:39I mean, it's all the same, isn't it?
00:58:42One is incapable of producing certain actions, certain words, certain thoughts.
00:58:54Unless one is possessed by something.
00:58:58Something beyond the nerves.
00:59:02Something that it...
00:59:04I've never felt like this before.
00:59:08It's as if I just woke up and something grew inside of me like a child.
00:59:18And it just sits there and acts up whenever I get too happy, too sad, or I'm around too many people, or no people, and I...
00:59:34...lose all of my senses.
00:59:40And it gets hard to remember.
00:59:44And I don't know.
00:59:48I don't even know her
00:59:53I just want so many things
00:59:59They all seem so far away
01:00:05I don't know
01:00:18I just miss you
01:00:41That night, when it was snowing
01:00:47Your daughter came to the hallway
01:00:49What did you see?
01:00:54I saw her
01:00:57Our daughter
01:01:01She was playing in a film
01:01:04And
01:01:08It was full of colors
01:01:10Bright and saturated like a kaleidoscope
01:01:14And there were many sounds
01:01:16And the scene consisted of an ocean
01:01:21Hawaii blue
01:01:23Bright sun
01:01:24White sand
01:01:26And I was standing three feet away from the waves
01:01:32As I watched her run towards them
01:01:34All by herself
01:01:36It sounds beautiful
01:01:41The waves and sounds all filled up the entire screen
01:01:46And then an eye filled up the entire screen
01:01:51And the sounds faded
01:01:53And I heard her laughter
01:01:58And then something inaudible
01:02:02And then the screen faded to white instead of black like normal movies do
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