00:00Let's get headlines with the metabolically 25-year-old Alejandro Solana, brought to you by Dural Kia.
00:08Dural Kia, home of the Pricito, our lowest price.
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00:14You just couldn't lay off, huh?
00:16You couldn't lay off.
00:17Don't be upset that you're follically challenged, Hawk.
00:20Don't lash out at me.
00:21Don't lash out.
00:22So, Lana bought an Atari 2600-style device that tells him his metabolic age, and he's celebrating that metabolically the app has told him he's 25.
00:36But I just want to clarify.
00:39What does that say?
00:40Hold on.
00:40What does that say?
00:4125, metabolic age, 25 years old, 25.
00:44But it's based on what?
00:46Information you've put in?
00:48No, it's based on a very.
00:51Very invasive.
00:52They did a very invasive procedure to figure out your metabolic age.
00:56No, it's a very complex.
00:58He stands on this metal plate from TJ Maxx, and they tell him how his body is set up now.
01:05Like a scale?
01:06A big scale.
01:06How dare you say it's from TJ Maxx?
01:09How dare you?
01:10From Ross.
01:14But you found out your metabolic age with no metabolic panels done.
01:18Like, no blood metabolic panels.
01:20Again, I mean, this isn't 1988.
01:23All you have to do is buy this contraption on Amazon.
01:26$17.
01:27I mean, what a bargain.
01:29And you lay it down.
01:32You grab this little device.
01:35You pull it up to your waist.
01:37You hold it.
01:38And 18 seconds later, you know everything you need to know about your body.
01:42You can't tell me that that's the extent of the test to tell you your metabolic age.
01:47It's fascinating what science can do now.
01:50And how do you think it's figuring out your metabolic age without doing anything invasive?
01:55I'm just curious.
01:56Yeah.
01:56What's crazy is, you know, my right leg and my left leg, there's about a 0.4 pound difference between the two.
02:03So now I know what to work on at the gym, Hawk.
02:06Truthfully, it's unbelievable.
02:08That I could understand it telling you.
02:10Because that's based on weight and you're standing on a scale.
02:12I'm just curious how you think it deciphers your metabolic age without getting invasive at all.
02:21Hawk, if you want to be a science denier, that's on you.
02:25I mean, you know, that's totally on you.
02:27But when I buy a piece of material that is giving me accurate results, accurate results based on technology and science, bro, I'm 25 years old metabolically.
02:45Metabolically.
02:47Just two questions.
02:49I'm a metallurgist.
02:50I got two.
02:51So standing on this snowboard with handles, I don't think that really is going deep into your, you know, health situation.
03:00To you.
03:01Also, Solana, how old are you?
03:03It's literally impossible.
03:05How old are you?
03:0631.
03:07You're 31.
03:09If that device tells everybody their metabolic rate is eight years older than they are, nobody else is buying it.
03:16So it's set to go six years below.
03:18So, so you're, you're saying, you're saying this company, I don't want to put this company on blast, but you're saying this company, by the way, this company on blast, it's not going to be around long because idiots aren't going to buy it.
03:27Which, which, what do you search on Timu for the, it's actually Alibaba.
03:35How many Rakuten points did you get?
03:41This is literally like, when you go to the doctors now, when you go, you go get your lab done, this is what they have you do.
03:52So I don't, I don't understand why you guys are.
03:54No, it's not what they have.
03:55Why would they send you to a lab?
03:56But this machine was just telling it to you.
04:00This machine is, you understand what a lab does?
04:02You understand what a lab does?
04:04This machine is a very, very expensive machine.
04:07And you guys, and I'm the craziest guy in Washington.
04:14That's fine.
04:15You know, I get it.
04:16You know, the two out of shape, older dudes are a little jealous that the young hotshot has a metabolic age of 25.
04:24Yeah, I get it.
04:24I totally understand what you got to tell it from.
04:26But don't hate on me.
04:28Don't hate on me, bro.
04:29You have good health insurance.
04:31I know.
04:32We have good health insurance.
04:33Yeah.
04:33Your doctor puts you on a metal plate and tells you how you feel and what your body's like.
04:40You need to get a new doctor.
04:43But how do you think?
04:44Do you know what a metabolic panel is?
04:47Do you know what a metabolic age is?
04:49Hawk, he's bragging about this metal plate.
04:52How do you think that you would be able to find that out with something mail order and an app?
05:00Like, it just, it doesn't add up.
05:02Why?
05:03Because you say so?
05:05Yes.
05:05Crowder's a thousand percent right, by the way.
05:07It's engaged to tell you less than what your age is so that you continue using this app.
05:15If everybody plugged in that app and it said, oh, your metabolic age is 38, you'd go, well, this thing.
05:21Well, what is this thing?
05:22No, no.
05:23You know what?
05:24And I'm not going to tell any of my friends.
05:25No, you know what people would have to do if it tells them their metabolic age is 38, they would have to go back to the gym.
05:31They'd have to go and try to get into a healthier routine to fix their life around it.
05:35I happen to live.
05:36You have to go to the gym to lower your metabolic age.
05:38Everything about how you eat, how you consume calories, how you're burning calories, your daily lifestyle.
05:44That has to do with your metabolic age.
05:47You can get younger metabolically?
05:49Yes, Hawk, of course.
05:51How you burn calories?
05:53You can get younger metabolically by eating different foods?
06:00Hawk, just living a healthier lifestyle, of course.
06:03That's how you change your metabolic age.
06:05Is healthier.
06:07What?
06:07What?
06:09That's how you can literally, you can change your metabolic age by living a healthier lifestyle, by burning calories at a quicker rate, by putting less calories into your body, by making sure that your body fat goes down.
06:25Like, that's all part of it, man.
06:27How hard do I have to work to get my metabolic age to 11?
06:32You have to stop stuffing your face in between commercial breaks and cheese.
06:36Can I get baby metabolics?
06:40What's your goal, by the way, if you're at 25 metabolic age?
06:43What's your goal?
06:44Four.
06:50Hey, can I start an app where I tell you your intellectual age?
06:53Hey, Venmo me 299.
06:59Venmo me 299.
07:00And then I'll direct message you.
07:02You're enduring.
07:02The guy on a blood pressure medication and the other guy who's about to lose his foot are hating on the guy that's 25 metabolically.
07:11And that's fair, man.
07:11I get it.
07:12I get it.
07:13I won't get your gums metabolically.
07:14How do you get your gum aid down metabolically?
07:17Let's both go back to middle school, big dog.
07:19Me and you.
07:20All right.
07:21I'll meet you at Carrot Express next week.
07:24We'll hit middle school.
07:29All right.
07:29Give us the headline show.
07:31I don't know what time was that gelb.
07:32Ticket Wizard loves to buy crap, too.
07:39And I always say to him, I go, man, I wish I had something to sell you.
07:42I wish I had anything to sell you.
07:45Ticket Wizard just bought this device that goes under his blankets to keep one side of the bed cool, the other side hot.
07:53Essentially, he's got a blow dryer under his blanket, but he spent like $400 on this thing.
08:01And he's like, well, it's because Tammy and I were different.
08:03And I'm like, well, just go get a blow dryer.
08:05And whoever's cold, put the blow dryer under their side.
08:09And, you know, and he's like, oh, no, no.
08:10This thing I go.
08:11God, I wish I had something to sell you.
08:13Hulk, Solana's standing on a scale with handlebars, linking it to his Bluetooth.
08:20Think about this.
08:21And then celebrating, Valentina, Valentina, I'm 25.
08:26But as he's saying, he's 25.
08:28His gums need to be replaced for the fifth time.
08:34I can only drink room temperature water because of the sensitivity of my gums.
08:38I mean, it's so bad.
08:42Typical of 25-year-olds.
08:45I haven't eaten ice cream in six years because my gums can't handle it.
08:51It's too cold.
08:52Your scale has handlebars.
08:55I'll take a video of me doing it.
08:57I'll take a video of me doing it.
08:58It's the same way.
09:00It's the same way.
09:00You go on these treadmills.
09:02You go on these treadmills.
09:03And they have like the little silver part where you have to put your hands on.
09:06It tells you your heart rate.
09:07It's telling you your heart rate.
09:08It tells you your heart rate and your pulse.
09:10That's the exact same function of the metabolic calendar, the metabolic calculator.
09:15The exact same function.
09:17I'm telling you.
09:18I'm telling you.
09:19So you believe the treadmill that can measure your heart rate, but you don't believe the scale?
09:25The scale can be measured without getting internal.
09:31Like do this.
09:32Touch your neck right here.
09:33You feel your heart rate.
09:34You guys are literally downplaying what the scale does because what it does is it measures your body fat.
09:41It measures all the internal organs.
09:45It measures everything that it needs to measure.
09:48It measures the internal organs.
09:50How could a scale measure internal organs?
09:53That's fine.
09:54Deny science.
09:55That's fine.
09:55We learned a lot about you this segment, huh?
09:58We learned a lot about you.
09:59Let's do headlines.
09:59Does it have a latch on it for you behind a boat?
10:10It's a metabolic age device and Tetris if you want to play games during the day.
10:17Go ahead.
10:18Give us that real quick.
10:20Marlins are in action tonight.
10:22They play the Nationals.
10:23We'll play them again tomorrow.
10:26And obviously Thursday night football tomorrow.
10:28The Dolphins will play New England on Sunday.
10:32Miami USF on Saturday.
10:34Somebody text in.
10:35Solana's describing the time machine in Napoleon Dynamite.
10:43It's going to be awesome.
10:50I'm 25 years old.
10:51The rain is insane in Kendall, man.
11:05Every day at 2 p.m.
11:06The sky is falling.
11:08Oh, my God.
11:09That's your weather.
11:10It's going to be awesome.
11:12It's going to be awesome.
11:12It's going to be awesome.
11:12It's going to be awesome.
11:13It's going to be awesome.
11:13It's going to be awesome.
11:14It's going to be awesome.
11:14It's going to be awesome.
11:15It's going to be awesome.
11:15It's going to be awesome.
11:16It's going to be awesome.
11:16It's going to be awesome.
11:16It's going to be awesome.
11:17It's going to be awesome.
11:17It's going to be awesome.
11:18It's going to be awesome.
11:18It's going to be awesome.
11:19It's going to be awesome.
11:19It's going to be awesome.
11:19It's going to be awesome.
11:20It's going to be awesome.
11:21It's going to be awesome.
11:21It's going to be awesome.
11:22It's going to be awesome.
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