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  • 3 weeks ago
Full Episode of Three. The Perfect Number
Transcript
00:00Fuck my life.
00:16I'm going to jump in the pool.
00:30Looking good there, Flake.
00:34Think so?
00:37I know so.
00:53The guys in this town haven't always been this hot, right?
00:57Maybe we've just been too young to appreciate them.
01:00It's time to go fishing.
01:05Oh, it looks like you caught someone.
01:08You know what? I'll be right back.
01:10I'll give you two a minute alone.
01:12No, no, no, no, no, no, no.
01:18Hey, beautiful.
01:22You from around here?
01:24Yeah, down the street.
01:26I mean, but we sold that house after my parents died.
01:30Love that.
01:32Hey, you want to get out of here with me?
01:35Not really.
01:36I'm not really loving this.
01:39Oh, come on.
01:40I mean, dressed like this.
01:42Back up, bro.
01:43Get off me!
01:44Hey!
01:46Get your hands off her.
01:47Who the hell are you?
01:49I said, get your hands off her.
01:54Or what?
01:56Or I'll make you.
02:05What the hell?
02:06How did you?
02:07How did you?
02:13There's two of you?
02:15How drunk am I?
02:16How drunk am I?
02:23Jesus, you okay?
02:25I am now.
02:31Thank you, Ethan.
02:33And thank you, Levi.
02:34What are you guys doing here?
02:35Ezra told us he'd be here celebrating, but we'd come say hi.
02:37We just missed him.
02:38Well, I guess we'll have to settle for you then.
02:40It's been forever.
02:42Too long.
02:43Way too long.
02:44You're all grown up.
02:45Yeah, four years will do that to a person.
02:46You look great.
02:48Does you look great, Ethan?
02:50Yeah, you look good, kiddo.
02:51Our little Flake is a college grad.
02:52Wait, Flake?
02:53That name hasn't died yet?
02:54Never.
02:56You okay?
02:57Yeah.
02:58Uh, we should get out of here.
02:59That creep's probably still lurking around somewhere.
03:00Oh, come on.
03:01Or not she's getting started.
03:02No, Ethan's right.
03:03I'm already exhausted, and I need to find Sam.
03:05Oh, come on.
03:06Oh, come on.
03:07Oh, come on.
03:08Oh, come on.
03:09Oh, come on.
03:10Oh, come on.
03:11Oh, come on.
03:12Oh, come on.
03:13Oh, come on.
03:14Oh, come on.
03:15Oh, come on.
03:16Oh, come on.
03:17Oh, come on.
03:18Oh, come on.
03:19Something tells me she'll be okay.
03:25You could crash at our place.
03:31Let's go.
03:45Hopefully it's comfortable enough.
03:47Are you kidding?
03:48Uh, there are towels in the closet.
03:51If you want to take a shower, the bathroom's just in there.
03:55This is crazy.
03:59What?
04:00Well, the last time I saw you, you were taking bong rips with my brother, and now you have a guest room.
04:07Yeah.
04:08Four years will do that to a person.
04:11Look, I know Ezra's excited to have you on his couch.
04:16You can stay here longer if you want.
04:19It might be more comfortable.
04:20Really?
04:22Yeah, you know.
04:23Just for the summer, while you figure things out.
04:25Figure things out.
04:26I would love that.
04:28Yeah?
04:32Why would you do that for me?
04:33Why would you do that for me?
04:46You're like basically my little sister.
04:51Well, I appreciate it.
04:54I really do.
04:58Can I have Maddie?
05:11Night, Ethan.
05:23What?
05:24You know what?
05:25Enlighten me.
05:26Maddie.
05:28What about her?
05:30Come on, dude.
05:31She's fucking hot.
05:35I haven't noticed.
05:36You two were in there a long time.
05:37Did something happen?
05:38No, nothing happened.
05:39She's Ezra's little sister.
05:41So?
05:46I promised that I'd help him take care of her.
05:48I'll take care of her.
05:49Not like that.
05:50What?
05:51You afraid I'll come out on top?
05:54Didn't last time.
05:55Oh, yeah.
05:56Divorce before 30.
05:57Huge victory for you.
05:58Fuck off.
06:00May the best man win.
06:02No.
06:03Levi.
06:04She lost her parents.
06:06She needs stability.
06:08A family.
06:09A home.
06:11A home?
06:12Yeah.
06:13Yeah.
06:14She's, uh, staying for the summer.
06:22Well.
06:26This will be interesting.
06:28Think you can resist?
06:29I'm not the one I'm worried about.
06:33Maddie's off limits.
06:36Okay?
06:37I just wanted to talk because I feel like things got kind of weird between us last night.
06:46Weird?
06:47With you and Ethan?
06:48Jesus, Levi, you look the same from behind.
06:49From the front suit, I've heard.
06:50I can tell the difference.
06:51You have the little dimple.
06:52God.
06:53You're so obsessed with me.
06:54And you're more of a flirt.
06:55So what are, uh, Ethan's defining characteristics?
06:56No dimple on a stick of his ass?
06:57No dimple on a stick of his ass?
07:26Your words, not mine.
07:28I hear you're staying with us for the summer.
07:31If that's okay with you?
07:33Depends.
07:34How you gonna repay me?
07:36Got any ideas?
07:39I like breakfast in bed.
07:44Back massages.
07:47And tickles.
07:49Tickles?
07:50Soft ones, though.
07:52Like this.
07:55What's going on?
08:11We're just figuring out how Maddie can earn her keep around here.
08:15You don't owe us anything.
08:17But I was actually thinking I could help you get a job.
08:21Fix up your resume, get to some interviews.
08:24I have a pretty big network.
08:26No dimple on a big network.
08:29That would be amazing.
08:32Really so generous of you, Ethan.
08:33Always the altruist.
08:35You know, uh, you could join my band if you want.
08:37We're always looking for new drummers.
08:39One small problem.
08:40I don't play the drums.
08:42You could be one of my groupies.
08:44I'd rather not have a job that requires me to follow you around everywhere.
08:47I have to go grab some things, so I'll see you guys later.
08:50I'll see you guys later.
09:08Hey, sis.
09:09I can't say I'm not offended that you decided to stay in a mansion with my best friends instead of staying on my couch.
09:16Life is full of tough decisions.
09:18I'll get a big enough place for the both of us soon.
09:20Don't get too used to being the 1%.
09:21Well, I'll try to do my best.
09:30So, what's the deal with the twins?
09:33They were best friends with Ezra in high school.
09:35Well, Ethan was.
09:37But Ethan and Levi are kind of a package deal.
09:39So?
09:41So what?
09:43You get first pick, and I get the other.
09:45What? I'm in no position to be picky.
09:48Ezra would kill me.
09:49Okay.
09:50But if you had to pick?
09:54Well, when I was younger, I used to have a massive crush on Ethan.
09:59But now it seems like Levi's kind of more interested.
10:03Yeah?
10:05But then again, he would flirt with anything with a heartbeat, so.
10:08Just get with one, get with both, get with someone, please!
10:11Not this again.
10:13Maddie, you're too hot to be a virgin.
10:19Keep your voice down.
10:20I'm sorry, but you're wasting some of God's best work.
10:24What are you waiting for?
10:26I don't know.
10:28Mads, I know you've been through hell and back.
10:31But I don't want you to close yourself off forever.
10:37I don't even know where I'd start.
10:39Just be open. Be yourself.
10:40They won't be able to resist you, I promise.
10:44Plus, if you strike out with one, you can have a do-over with the other.
10:48.
11:07So how does it look?
11:10Really good.
11:13Geez, you worked a lot of part-time jobs in college.
11:15Yeah, well, I didn't have much of a choice after my parents, you know.
11:22I'd just clean this language up a bit.
11:26And you need to add more details about your degree in the education section.
11:32Sounds easy enough.
11:34It'll be fine.
11:36You have way more experience than most people your age.
11:38Only in this sense, unfortunately.
11:39Um...
11:40I'll look over it again when you're done. Okay, Kudam?
11:50Wait.
11:52What?
11:53Um...
12:07You read Jane Austen?
12:10Got a problem with that?
12:12I just didn't think you were much of a reader.
12:13And...
12:14Persuasion is my favorite book.
12:17I know.
12:19You told me to read it back in the day, so I did.
12:22A few times.
12:26It has one of my favorite lines, ever.
12:27You pierce my soul.
12:32I am half agony, half hope.
12:34Tell me not that I am too late.
12:36That such...
12:38Precious feelings are gone.
12:41Forever.
12:43Hey, Flake.
12:45You're working me too hard out here?
12:47No.
12:49No.
12:51No.
12:53No.
12:55No.
12:58Nope, we're done.
13:00Put your suit on, Flake.
13:02Let's go for a swim.
13:27Fuck my life.
13:34I'm gonna jump in the pool.
13:49Looking good there, Flake.
13:52Think so?
13:54I know so.
14:02Get my back?
14:04I thought you were gonna be doing favors for me.
14:07I can ask Ethan.
14:09Ah, no, no, no.
14:10I'll burden myself.
14:12Just this once.
14:13questa.
14:14Oh, no.
14:16I can't do that.
14:18I can't do that.
14:22I can't do that.
14:36Well, my pain's gone.
14:37Oops.
14:39What?
14:41It's getting all over the strings.
14:43Oh, let me just...
15:07Levi!
15:19A word.
15:23What's up with him?
15:25Figured out. Would you let me know?
15:29This is officially embarrassing.
15:35What the hell were you doing?
15:57I was protecting him from the sun. Via cream.
16:01Looked like a little more than that.
16:03What about your little career development session?
16:05Your hands were all over her.
16:07Yeah, they were.
16:09It was awesome.
16:11I know what it's like to have my trust broken.
16:15I'm not going to do that to Ezra
16:17by letting my man-whore brother
16:19take advantage of his little sister.
16:21Fine.
16:23Asshole.
16:25Oh, then I'm going to my room.
16:35Yeah, me too.
16:37Tell me what you're feeling?
16:41I'm feeling like I can't...
16:55I can't stand the thought of another man's hands on you.
17:06Another man's lips.
17:08Are you cold?
17:08I'm feeling like I need all of you.
17:11Yeah, I'm a little cold.
17:13Yeah.
17:13Right.
17:15Yeah.
17:18Take me.
17:20I'm all yours.
17:21Is that better?
17:34Still a little cold.
17:39I gotcha.
17:47Wait.
17:48Wait.
17:50Let's wait for her.
17:51Wait.
17:51Do you want to go back to life?
18:19Hannah?
18:20Or if you want, you can come back to mine.
18:47Manny?
19:01Manny?
19:08Manny?
19:10Manny?
19:10Now, sometimes we get articles coming to the club that are sometimes fun.
19:14You fell asleep during the movie, kiddo.
19:16Well, we have something coming on next that has to do with your health.
19:19This is a very important night.
19:21You know someone in your family?
19:22Sorry.
19:24Don't be sorry.
19:24I would have let you sleep.
19:25I would have let you sleep, but it sounded like you were having a bad dream.
19:29It wasn't bad, exactly.
19:32It was just extremely confusing.
19:36A blood pressure machine.
19:37A blood pressure machine and a thermometer, all in one.
19:44So, I need all the updates.
19:47How's it going?
19:48It's insane.
19:49It's insane.
19:51It's like I keep having these moments with them, and then nothing happens.
19:56Why not?
19:57I don't know.
19:58But it's driving me crazy.
20:01I guess maybe they still see me as a little kid.
20:04Like Ezra's annoying little sister.
20:05Look, if you're not going to get with Tweedledee or Tweedledum, then we need to find you someone new.
20:11There was this guy who went to my community college.
20:14He's not my type.
20:16Like he's not an asshole?
20:18Exactly.
20:19He's sweet.
20:21Yeah, I'll do it.
20:22I need to get out of this house.
20:23It's huge.
20:26Not huge enough.
20:34Bye, boys.
20:35Hey, Mads.
20:37I sent your resume over to my friend at the marketing...
20:39Oh.
20:42Wow.
20:45Where are you going?
20:48On a date.
20:50A date?
20:50With who?
20:52Some guy.
20:55Some guy?
20:57Oh.
20:58That must be some guy.
21:00Shall we, Ethan?
21:01We're behind you, brother.
21:02Guys, no, please don't.
21:04Wait.
21:05No, no, no, no, no, no, no.
21:10Hello, some guy.
21:16I'm sorry, is...
21:17I'm Levi.
21:18This is Ethan.
21:19Okay.
21:20And you are?
21:22I'm...
21:23Is this 15321 Beauville?
21:26You're in the right place.
21:27Or the wrong place, depending on how you look at the situation.
21:29Is this some kind of YouTube prank series?
21:33I feel like I've seen this one before.
21:35No cameras here, buddy.
21:36No witnesses.
21:37What are your intentions with Maddie?
21:39Are you guys her brothers or something?
21:42No, they're not.
21:44Hi, Dave.
21:45Oh.
21:46Some guy has a name.
21:47Dave what?
21:47I mean, first and last.
21:48Don't mind them.
21:50Let's get out of here.
21:51We're gonna be going now.
21:52Call the night there, buddy.
22:08That's the lady.
22:09Where is she?
22:10She's a catch, Ethan.
22:15Neither one of us gets to date her.
22:18Someone else will.
22:19Jesus.
22:41Are you guys?
22:43It's Ethan.
22:44Oh, sorry.
22:47What are you doing?
22:49It's past midnight.
22:53So?
22:54So?
22:55You should have come home sooner.
22:58I should have?
23:00I'm sorry.
23:01I didn't know that the offer of me staying here came with a curfew.
23:05Are there any other rules I should know about?
23:10For starters, you shouldn't go on a date with men you don't know.
23:13That's kind of the point of the date, is to get to know him.
23:16I don't trust him.
23:17Not with you.
23:18Why?
23:18Because I'm some helpless kid?
23:20Some pathetic little orphan that you need to save?
23:24How do you know?
23:24You're not my brother.
23:26And you're not my boyfriend.
23:27You've made that pretty clear.
23:30What's that supposed to mean?
23:32Every time we get close, it feels like you're going to...
23:35But then you never do.
23:39Never do what?
23:46Never do what, Maddie?
23:50Kiss me?
23:51Something else.
23:52Oh, my God.
23:53I'm missing out.
23:55Iendy?
23:56Oh, my God.
23:56I guess I might happen to you.
24:00We're going to kill
24:03Me.
24:05What?
24:08It feels like you weren't alone.
24:08You're dunno.
24:10Amazing.
24:11I left you in aBecause
24:13at my интерес room.
24:14Let me kill you.
24:15No.
24:16I guess what's what was going on.
24:16You're done.
24:17I got holes tied up here.
24:17And goodbye.
24:18I left you.
24:19I'm on a посмотрite.
24:19Wait.
24:29Sorry, did I do something?
24:31No.
24:33I just wanted to tell you that
24:36I've never done this before.
24:45Oh, wow.
24:46Does that, like, totally freak you out?
24:50No, no, no, no, of course not.
24:53I just wanted to be special for you.
24:57It's special because it's you.
25:00Yeah, but I want it to be perfect.
25:04I want to take you out first.
25:08I'm free tomorrow.
25:10It's a date, then.
25:13A date?
25:15Yeah.
25:16I like the sound of that.
25:31Ethan?
25:33Ethan?
25:35Buddy, where are you?
25:42What?
25:42What's going on?
25:44Ezra.
25:45Ethan, we gotta go.
25:46Oh, shit.
25:47Where are my clothes?
25:48Where are my clothes?
25:48Where are my clothes?
25:49Where are my clothes?
25:49Where did you put them?
25:55I'm gonna go out the window.
25:56You can't go out like that.
25:58Better that than finding me here.
25:59What are you gonna say?
26:00Ethan!
26:02I'll figure it out.
26:02I'll go out.
26:22Ezra!
26:24Hey, bro.
26:25What are you doing here?
26:27Tea time's a ten.
26:28What are you doing?
26:28i was just outside in your underwear yeah to get in the mail where is it what the mail
26:44oh yeah it didn't come yet i guess okay will you put some clothes on you're freaking me out
26:58how are you doing brother you seem a little off you know just work stuff this isn't because of maddie is it
27:11what do you mean it's just you guys are doing me a real solid letting her stay with you for the
27:16summer and i hope it's not stressing you out oh no of course not i promised we helped you take
27:24care of her i applied for a two-bedroom apartment yesterday so hopefully she'll be out of your hair
27:28soon well good for you man we'll miss her around here she's the best isn't she the best i know she's
27:38not a kid anymore but i just don't feel like anybody is good enough for her i'm gonna get dressed
27:58hey can i talk to you oh there you are
28:11where have you been all day i was golfing with your brother well i'm almost ready i just need to i can't
28:18i don't know what came over me last night but i don't see you like that
28:35i never have well what happened did ezra find out or something no he didn't
28:41look i i'm sorry if i gave you the wrong idea kiddo don't call me that
28:52i'm sorry money
29:03i i don't know sam one minute he's kissing me and then the next he's treating me like i'm a stranger
29:08he's an asshole yeah a total asshole who is an asshole i'll call you back sam
29:19hey were you crying it was a fucking dave i'll kill him you can talk to me flag i don't think i can
29:28not about this if someone hurt you i want to know who's the asshole
29:32what happened he kissed me last night
29:43ethan ethan kissed you my brother ethan kissed you he said he was going to take me on a date tonight
29:50and then he canceled and then he said that he doesn't think of me that way which is confusing because we almost
29:56whatever
30:01asshole exactly
30:08you know
30:10i happen to know someone who looks exactly like ethan who does think of you that way
30:16oh yeah plus
30:18yes yes this it's dimple
30:27oh are you um
30:30do you want to go on a date tonight
30:31this is delicious
30:44who knew they made alcohol delicious
30:47you just got to know what to order
30:49i want another one
30:51you sure
30:52i can't afford a strong drink here
30:53i'm sure
30:56sam says that i should let loose
31:00don't you think i deserve to have fun
31:02of course you do flake
31:04ethan's no fun
31:06i've always said that
31:08do you have that
31:10thing
31:11what thing
31:12the twin telepathy thing
31:16sometimes it feels that way
31:17so tell me
31:18why did ethan reject me
31:28uh ethan's been going through some tough
31:30shit recently
31:31you know he just got divorced
31:36but enough about my brother okay
31:41i must seem pretty pathetic
31:43like a sensitive little snowflake huh
31:48i don't call you flake because you're sensitive
31:54it's because you're beautiful
31:57one of a kind
32:01there's no one like you maddie
32:18so you want me to get you that drink or
32:32no
32:34let's get out of here
32:48i don't know
32:55maddie
32:57listen i don't know if you're awake
33:00but i need to talk to you
33:06i feel terrible about how i handled that i
33:09i i need i need you to know that i
33:12i really
33:18hey bro
33:20what the hell are you doing in there
33:23none of your business
33:26i can't believe you promised me you shook my hand
33:28you shook mine too and you kissed her first
33:32she told me
33:34all bets are off ethan
33:35don't do this please
33:38i know the way you are with women
33:40this isn't maddie
33:41it's different
33:42she's different
33:45did you sleep with her
33:47gentleman never tells
33:50you're gonna hurt her
33:52well newsflash brother
33:55you already did
33:55can i talk to you
34:11sure
34:14i just wanted you to hear it from me
34:16um last night levi and i
34:21he told me
34:24okay well
34:25we don't have to talk about it maddie
34:28you're an adult
34:30it's your life
34:32well thank you
34:36i just hope that we can
34:38still be friends
34:43always
34:46you're headed somewhere
34:49i have an interview with the marketing agency today
34:52you like the part
34:53good luck
34:58hey maddie
35:00yeah
35:02do you want to practice
35:06please
35:10so miss
35:11madison davis
35:12what would you say your greatest strengths are
35:14oh my god um
35:16i don't
35:17i don't know
35:17well you shouldn't say that
35:22um
35:24come on maddie
35:25you're one of the strongest women
35:27i know
35:28after everything you've been through
35:30you've picked yourself back up
35:31you're determined
35:33you go for what you want
35:34and you get it
35:35not always
35:42and what would you say your greatest weakness is
35:47fear
35:48i'm afraid
35:48of what
35:51losing
35:51things
35:52losing people
35:57what's your greatest weakness ethan
36:03i'm too stubborn for my own good
36:05oh yeah
36:07i try to do the right thing all the time but i think i end up missing out on the thing that i want
36:12that's how i ended up married to a woman i didn't love for way too long
36:15marta
36:17levi and i fought over her for ages and almost ruined our relationship
36:22when marta and i actually ended up together i realized there was a whole
36:25string of other guys that i didn't know about
36:28and you still got married to her
36:30well i feel like i had to
36:32after she told me she was pregnant
36:38you have a child
36:40why would no why would no one tell me about that
36:43because i don't
36:44marta faked the pregnancy to stop me from leaving
36:47and after when i realized she'd lied
36:50i don't know who to talk to
36:53how did you get out
36:57she left me for one of those other guys
37:00isn't that pathetic
37:02i waited for her to do the thing that i was dying to do all along
37:09you don't have to be so stubborn you know
37:13you don't have to be so afraid
37:26give me the silent treatment
37:29nope
37:32gonna say any words other than that one
37:33nope
37:37got it
37:43they just offered it to me on the spot
37:45i got the job
37:46oh i knew you'd kill it
37:54that's amazing maddie
37:58thank you so much for all of your help i couldn't have done it without you
38:00of course
38:03both of you
38:04of course
38:15i'm saving this one for a special occasion
38:17thank you kind waiter
38:19to maddie
38:20congrats on the new job
38:22thank you
38:25i have some news too
38:27i applied for a bigger apartment
38:29and i got it mad
38:31it doesn't exactly compare to this place but you'll have your own room
38:34that's amazing hezra
38:36i can't wait
38:38i know the boys will miss you but
38:40yeah i think they'll be happy to have their guest room back
38:45where's levi anyway
38:47i get a gig at le cirque um
38:50but he should have been back by now
38:52maybe a ran long
38:55ran long huh
39:00are you not gonna drink with us
39:02um i'm just gonna head out for a bit
39:05uh pick up some ice cream
39:06uh which flavor do you guys want
39:09actually don't worry i'll just get a bunch
39:22hey levi
39:27hey bro
39:29what the
39:29are you doing
39:31what do you mean
39:32you said it was different with maddie you said you liked her
39:34i do like her
39:35who the
39:35is maddie
39:36get your ass back home right now
39:38are you serious bro we're not married we're not even dating we just hooked up
39:43what's your problem bro what's my problem
39:46you're my problem
39:51you're gonna punch me
39:53really i'm not your problem
39:55asshole she is
39:56hey no fists in my bar
39:58both of you get the hell out of here
39:59oh my god are you okay
40:13so no ice cream then
40:31what happened
40:38here let me help you
40:38thank you
40:46are you okay
40:52you like me maddie
41:03yeah i do of course i do
41:07i like you too
41:09a lot
41:13but he's in love with you
41:14what do you
41:20i mean how do you know
41:23let's just call it a twin telepathy thing
41:27are you in love with them too
41:33i'm sorry
41:36don't be
41:36not my fault you're bad taste in men
41:59hey
42:00what happened
42:03i can't lie to you man
42:06levi is dating your sister
42:12hey where are you going
42:14i want to make sure you hit him hard enough
42:17i got him pretty good
42:18well thank you for doing that
42:20at least i can count on one of you
42:23fuck
42:27ezra
42:29the thing is i didn't punch him because he's dating her
42:32i punch him because i'm not
42:36what does that mean
42:38it means that i want her
42:44i want to be with her
42:49ez talk to me man what are you thinking
42:51i'm thinking that i could expect this from levi but you
42:55you know i always try to do the right thing
42:57so the right thing is chasing after my little sister huh
43:00i'm not chasing after her man it's not some game to me
43:03i'm in love with her man
43:05i love her
43:06then what does she think
43:11you love me
43:22i love you too
43:23i've always loved you ethan
43:32all i ever wanted was to make you happy
43:35to take care of you
43:37i don't understand if you love me then why did you
43:40push me away
43:42because ezra trusts me because he doesn't think anyone is good enough for you and i don't either
43:47i can decide for myself okay
43:50i don't know what to say
43:53i think you say you'll kill me if i ever hurt her
43:58it's true
44:00i know
44:03you guys have my blessing or whatever
44:06but this is still weird
44:13so
44:16so
44:16it's over with Levi
44:22it's over
44:24it never really started
44:28it's always been you
44:38i think this is why i never slept with anyone else i wanted it to be you
44:54wait you didn't sleep with Levi
44:55no
44:57no
44:57oh thank god
44:59i don't
45:00i don't
45:00i don't
45:01Wait, you're not going to change your mind tomorrow, are you?
45:28No chance, you can take this slow, okay, if you get scared, I'm not scared, not with you.
45:53No chance, you can take this slow, okay, if you get scared, I'm not scared, not with you.
46:00No chance, you can take this slow, okay, if you get scared, not with you.
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