- 4 months ago
Category
🎥
Short filmTranscript
00:00:00You
00:00:30THE END
00:01:00I am not interested in your problems, Agent Karloff.
00:01:09I am only interested in getting our property back
00:01:11and getting rid of their agent permanently.
00:01:30The END
00:01:40This is Banner.
00:01:44I must meet you.
00:01:47Well, I can finish up here later.
00:01:50Sure.
00:01:51When can we meet?
00:01:52Not tomorrow.
00:01:54I've got a little side trip I've got to take first.
00:01:57The next day, then?
00:01:58I could meet you Thursday night in L.A., though.
00:02:00At the Bonaventure?
00:02:01Yeah, at the Bonaventure.
00:02:02Sure.
00:02:03Okay.
00:02:04All right, Miss Karloff.
00:02:05Eight-ish?
00:02:06Eight-ish it is, then.
00:02:08Okay.
00:02:09Sorry, Ling.
00:02:12Got to go.
00:02:13But maybe we can pick this up another time, huh?
00:02:16Or even another lifetime, darling.
00:02:20Ciao.
00:02:20Bye.
00:02:20Oh, my God.
00:02:50Oh, what a waste.
00:02:56Francois, are you coming?
00:02:57Oui, monsieur.
00:02:59At least, monsieur Banner, I got my gun off.
00:03:04God, I love this job.
00:03:06Ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah.
00:03:27I'm living on the edge
00:03:31Without a prayer inside
00:03:34You've got me walking on a land
00:03:39In the darkest part of night
00:03:44Standing at the end
00:03:47With so much left to learn
00:03:51You know that you're my only friend
00:03:55I've got nowhere left to turn
00:03:59I'm living on the end
00:04:04Standing all alone
00:04:07I'm walking on a land
00:04:12With nowhere left to go
00:04:15But one day I'll be free
00:04:19And I'll step down off the ledge
00:04:24Until it's over
00:04:26I'll be living on the end
00:04:34When I'm alone with you
00:04:40The world becomes so clear
00:04:44But then the moments are so few
00:04:48When I can have you near me
00:04:52So much time to work
00:04:57So little time to play
00:05:00I guess it's just my love in life
00:05:05And a heavy price to pay
00:05:08I'm living on the edge
00:05:13Just standing all alone
00:05:17I'm walking on a land
00:05:20With nowhere left to go
00:05:24And one day I'll be free
00:05:29And one day I'll be free
00:05:30And I'll step down off the ledge
00:05:33Until it's over
00:05:35I'll be living on the edge
00:05:41When it's over
00:05:46Truly over
00:05:50I'll be waiting for you
00:05:57When it's over
00:06:00When it's over
00:06:04Truly over
00:06:06Truly over
00:06:07I'll be here
00:06:10With you
00:06:14I'm living on the edge
00:06:25Just standing all alone
00:06:28I'm walking on a land
00:06:32With nowhere left to go
00:06:36But one day I'll be free
00:06:40And I'll step down off the ledge
00:06:45Until it's over
00:06:47I'll be living on the edge
00:06:52Where the hell is that unreliable son of a bitch?
00:07:04How come you can be on time and he can't?
00:07:05He's here, sir
00:07:06I saw him in his quarters last night
00:07:08I'll bet you did
00:07:09I thought you two were through again
00:07:10Listen, why don't you just give this to him?
00:07:13I'm sick and tired of sitting around
00:07:14Waiting for the great Mr. Banner
00:07:16Who called?
00:07:20Well, hi, y'all
00:07:21What the hell is she doing here?
00:07:25Well, why don't you just think of me
00:07:27As your report card, by the way?
00:07:29No, Mr. E counts on me
00:07:31To protect the special interests
00:07:33Of these special operations
00:07:35You're doing a swell job, Chesney
00:07:37Just what I need
00:07:38A goddamn watchdog
00:07:39Just keep it up, Python
00:07:44And you're a dead man
00:07:49You know, Python
00:07:53It's really good to see our two agencies
00:07:56Working together again
00:07:57On this mission, Hotshot
00:08:00You're working for me
00:08:01Oh, is that a fact, Colonel?
00:08:03As long as I outrank you, it is
00:08:05Gentlemen, I believe we have a job to do
00:08:08All right, just run it down, Python
00:08:11It's pretty cut and dry, Sonny
00:08:13But if you need me to explain it to you
00:08:16You've got to go someplace you're not supposed to be
00:08:18To take out a radar installation
00:08:20That's not supposed to exist
00:08:21And there's one more thing, Super Spy
00:08:24I want you to remember that it's because of you
00:08:27I lost my legs in the interest of interagency cooperation
00:08:32Now you get the hell out of here before I really get mad
00:08:37And I want you to check with me every step of the way
00:08:41And if you need backup, I'm your contact
00:08:44You understand, trust me
00:09:07I want you to check with me
00:09:37Okay, Banner, it looks like the camp is just a half a mile to the east
00:09:49We might as well take it down
00:09:55Hey, did you get a good look at that radar unit?
00:09:58Yeah, yeah, there's only a couple of guys around
00:10:00It looks like a piece of cake
00:10:01Well, hell, Jake
00:10:03Let's go get a piece
00:10:04Oh, please, Banner
00:10:06Okay, let's go get a piece of cake
00:10:07So, let's go.
00:10:37Oh, Jack, I'm giving you your 38, would you?
00:11:05What?
00:11:07Just a little extra protection for me.
00:11:13Daddy Yankee?
00:11:17Buenos dias, senorita.
00:11:21Come on, Banner, let's blow this pop stand.
00:11:23With this?
00:11:24I'm sure our comrades will get a bang on this one.
00:11:27Here, take an end to this, will you?
00:11:35Oh, my God.
00:11:45Oh, my God.
00:11:47Oh, my God.
00:11:49Oh, my God.
00:11:51Oh, my God.
00:12:07Oh, my God.
00:12:09Oh, my God.
00:12:11Oh, my God.
00:12:13Oh, my God.
00:12:15Oh, my God.
00:12:17Oh, my God.
00:12:19Oh, my God.
00:12:21Oh, my God.
00:12:23Oh, my God.
00:12:25Oh, my God.
00:12:27Oh, my God.
00:12:29Oh, my God.
00:12:31Oh, my God.
00:12:33Oh, my God.
00:12:35Oh, my God.
00:14:39Just hang in there, Val.
00:14:41This was never in the manual.
00:14:42The target is in sight, sir.
00:14:56Good lieutenant.
00:14:58What about your friend, Banner?
00:14:59You got him spotted yet?
00:15:01No, no sign of him yet.
00:15:05Here we go.
00:15:06Here we go.
00:15:35guitar solo
00:16:05Let's take a night, Gracie.
00:16:34Black Panther.
00:16:35Black Panther.
00:16:36What's the status of our man?
00:16:40Banner's made it into the compound
00:16:41where the Cubans are storing that JVQ radar jamming unit.
00:16:47Thank God for small miracles.
00:16:49You were right.
00:16:51It is compact.
00:16:53Maybe even mobile.
00:16:55Could be a very serious threat.
00:16:57The only serious threat out there
00:16:59is that son-of-a-bitch Banner.
00:17:01All right, just stick to the script
00:17:05and get the job done.
00:17:07Yes, sir.
00:17:07Whatever it takes.
00:17:08Just this plan.
00:17:17I need my computer.
00:17:21Very careful.
00:17:22Okay.
00:17:23I need my computer.
00:17:24Oh, my God.
00:17:54Oh, my God.
00:18:24Oh, my God.
00:18:54It's been a long time.
00:18:56Too long.
00:18:57Too bad.
00:18:59Our big visit will be short.
00:19:04Mary-Kid pig.
00:19:06What the hell is he to now?
00:19:10Jeez.
00:19:11Lieutenant.
00:19:11Yes, sir?
00:19:12Take it there's a problem.
00:19:13Yes.
00:19:14We might need some backup.
00:19:15I figured you as much.
00:19:16What's your position?
00:19:18Banner's coordinates.
00:19:19They're, um, 457.7 latitude, 52.8 longitude.
00:19:26He's got about 30 seconds, sir, to make a splash, or should I say a bang?
00:19:31All right.
00:19:32Just get on with it.
00:19:32Play it safe and cover your ass.
00:19:35Get out of there with or without Banner.
00:19:37Yes, sir.
00:19:38Yeah.
00:19:38Yes.
00:19:38I know the drill.
00:19:40Hey, Jacqueline.
00:19:41Yes.
00:19:41I hope he doesn't forget what he came there for.
00:19:44Yes, I'm sure he'll take the jammy unit out.
00:19:46He can take care of himself, sir.
00:19:48Yeah.
00:19:49If I know him, he'll probably take himself out with it.
00:19:52And don't worry about the backup.
00:19:54It's on its way.
00:19:56Out.
00:19:56Yeah, this is Python.
00:20:08Give me the Pentagon.
00:20:11Huh?
00:20:12I'm surprised that your government can't do better than this.
00:20:18Mucho patiticheskia!
00:20:23General, you know what the budget cuts that our government's doing.
00:20:26I mean, it just makes our job a little harder.
00:20:28Ah!
00:20:37Nice.
00:20:38Nice.
00:20:39You know, General, time flies when you're having fun, doesn't it?
00:20:44It's not short!
00:20:46Give me that, General.
00:20:47Stick it where the sun don't shine.
00:20:53Come on, get out of there.
00:20:55Steve and James Banner.
00:21:01Dos vedani, General.
00:21:02Almeros!
00:21:04Almeros!
00:21:04Oh!
00:21:05Oh!
00:21:05Oh!
00:21:06Oh!
00:21:06Oh!
00:21:07Oh!
00:21:07No, no, no, no, no, no, no.
00:21:37No te siento, ¡es ejercicio!
00:21:47¡Chachos, acúrate, traigan los mismos!
00:21:49¡Mándale, mándale! ¡Acúrate, acúrate!
00:22:07¡Acúrate, acúrate, acúrate!
00:22:09¡Acúrate, acúrate!
00:22:11¡Acúrate, acúrate!
00:22:13¡Acúrate, acúrate!
00:22:15Dios mío, Santa María!
00:22:17¡Acúrate!
00:22:19¡Acúrate!
00:22:21¡Acúrate, acúrate!
00:22:23¡Acúrate!
00:22:25Let's go.
00:22:55I wonder how I am so fired.
00:23:25Code 5, Code 4, come in.
00:23:44Can you read?
00:23:46I'm a little busy right now.
00:23:48I'm sorry.
00:23:49I lost your visual.
00:23:50Can you make it to the plate?
00:23:52Roger.
00:23:52I'm almost there.
00:23:53You better be too, Jack.
00:23:54Let's go.
00:23:55I lost my soul.
00:23:57I lost my soul.
00:24:00I lost my soul.
00:24:05I lost my soul.
00:24:11This is code 5. Code 5. Jackman, are you there? Come in.
00:24:30Tanner, what was that explosion?
00:24:32Is our ticket out of here?
00:24:34The plane? The plane's been hit?
00:24:37All right, listen. I radioed for some backup earlier.
00:24:41There should be a chopper at the run-even point.
00:24:43Okay, on my way.
00:24:47You better be there. You son of a bitch.
00:24:50Roger, base me.
00:24:58One, three, zero, three.
00:25:10Roger, base me.
00:25:11Go on, Jackman. Get the hell out of here.
00:25:32That's enormous.
00:25:34Get out.
00:25:40Get out.
00:25:42Keep it free.
00:25:47Go.
00:25:48Come on.
00:25:59Come on.
00:26:14Buddy.
00:26:16Three of the crowd.
00:26:18Come on.
00:26:22Oh, Steven.
00:26:24Jacket.
00:26:34Bravo, Leader. This is Code 5, Commander. Do you have copy?
00:26:3823, base 3.
00:26:40All right. The target is permanently disabled.
00:26:43I repeat, permanently disabled.
00:26:45Take your troops to the pre-designated coordinates and destroy the remains of the camp.
00:26:50Do you understand, Bravo, Leader?
00:26:52One, two, three.
00:26:54Good.
00:26:56God damn it, Banner. Nobody touches that camp.
00:27:02Do you copy, Bravo, Leader?
00:27:05Banner, what frequency are you on?
00:27:08Switching to frequency 1.25 X-ray.
00:27:13Charlie Company, Team Leader.
00:27:14Banner, are you in position?
00:27:17Banner.
00:27:19Can anybody hear me?
00:27:23I knew he'd do this to me. They're gonna have my ass for this.
00:27:29Good. But remember, this is the 1980s, guys, and not the Bay of Pigs, so just back up Bravo Company with some firepower and get your boys home. Is it understood, Charlie?
00:27:41Yes, sir, Captain. We're moving in now.
00:27:44Good luck, man.
00:27:45Out.
00:28:03Banner!
00:28:11Banner, Banner, Banner, Banner, Banner, Banner, Banner, Banner, Banner, Banner, Banner, Banner, Banner, Banner, Banner, Banner, Banner, Banner, Banner, Banner, Banner, Banner, Banner, Banner, Banner, Banner, Banner, Banner, Banner, Banner, Banner, Banner, Banner, Banner, Banner, Banner, Banner, Banner, Banner, Banner, Banner, Banner, Banner, Banner, Banner, Banner, Banner, Banner, Banner, Banner, Banner, Banner, Banner, Banner, Banner, Banner, Banner, Banner, Banner, Banner, Banner, Banner, Banner, Banner, Banner, Banner, Banner, Banner, Banner, Banner, Banner, Banner, Banner, Banner
00:32:12That footage is real, comrade.
00:32:15Pardon me, General, but this doesn't seem to be very important from our country's point of view.
00:32:20Just get the film away from the Americans and drop it in the vault at our UN operations.
00:32:27Yes, sir.
00:32:28Ladies and gentlemen, would you please give Mr. E.
00:32:41Ladies and gentlemen, would you please give Mr. E. your undivided attention?
00:32:58I believe you all know why you're here.
00:33:03If you would allow me, sir.
00:33:05It took a great deal of effort and interagency cooperation in order to obtain this valuable piece of black men.
00:33:14I have personally laid my reputation on the line.
00:33:18Now, if you will, pay close attention to what you're going to see on the screen.
00:33:23The subject had no knowledge that he was being filmed.
00:33:49Suffice it to say, this is confidential.
00:33:54I trust that nothing would go beyond this room.
00:33:58Agreed?
00:33:59Thank you, Mr. E.
00:34:01Roll film, please.
00:34:03Okay, right away.
00:34:09Hello, everybody.
00:34:17That's awesome.
00:34:18What a great deal.
00:34:27What a wonderful son.
00:34:31How is your son.
00:34:35what is this a joke i assure you it's not
00:34:44and if you'll just be patient lieutenant we'll all be able to find out just how critical this
00:34:52is to our national security and i'm a cop i carry a badge a gun and bullets and a night's ticket
00:35:02and handcuffed and i'm standing
00:35:32so
00:35:39so
00:35:46so
00:35:51now remember this particular incident happened over 20 years ago the boy was just about eight
00:36:11years old then was institutionalized presumably for life
00:36:15uh madame claus
00:36:19oh you mean subordinate claus
00:36:21you didn't have to do it
00:36:26oh my god
00:36:28oh
00:36:30oh
00:36:32oh
00:36:34oh
00:36:36oh
00:36:38oh
00:36:40oh
00:36:42oh
00:36:44oh
00:36:46oh
00:36:54oh
00:36:56oh
00:37:02oh
00:37:04oh
00:37:06oh
00:37:08oh
00:37:09oh
00:37:11That, folks, was almost 20 years ago.
00:37:41Turn on the lights. What's wrong with the film?
00:37:48What are you guys doing then?
00:37:50What?
00:37:52It appears the rest of the film is missing, sir.
00:37:56Gone.
00:37:58Find that film today.
00:38:00Put your best man on it.
00:38:02Yes, sir.
00:38:04Consider it done.
00:38:11Stephen, I'm so glad you could make dinner tonight.
00:38:24I must say, it's been a most enlightening evening.
00:38:27Why, thank you, Stephen.
00:38:29And I must say, I was certainly surprised to know you were free tonight.
00:38:34The scuttlebutt around the office says you're working on a very important project.
00:38:39Cuba.
00:38:40Maybe, but that's pretty much behind us now.
00:38:43Uh, tell me, Ms. Karloff, how long have you been with our agency?
00:38:47And how did you know about my son?
00:38:50Oh, well, you certainly aren't inquisitive, little devil, aren't you?
00:38:54I almost feel as if you don't trust me, Stephen.
00:38:58No, not at all.
00:39:00This has been a long trip back from Hong Kong, that's all.
00:39:03I'm just a little tired.
00:39:04Excuse me, sir. You have an urgent phone call?
00:39:06Oh, God.
00:39:08Never ends.
00:39:10Banner here.
00:39:11Stephen, I'm glad I found you.
00:39:13How did you?
00:39:15I won't even ask.
00:39:16I suppose it's important, don't I?
00:39:18Mr. E is livid.
00:39:20Someone inside our headquarters snatched a highly secret film that must be recovered.
00:39:25You suspect, of course, a...
00:39:27Yes, a double agent.
00:39:29Uh, right, Lieutenant. I think the answer might be staring me right in the face.
00:39:35What?
00:39:36Never mind.
00:39:37I'll, uh, I'll explain it all later.
00:39:39Uh, where's the meet?
00:39:41At the submarine base.
00:39:42About one hour.
00:39:43Okay.
00:39:44Sure.
00:39:45Well, it's gonna have my, uh, I need to run, but duty does call.
00:39:50Uh, waiter, can this lovely lady have some coffee?
00:39:54Or...
00:39:55Perhaps you'd prefer a black Russian.
00:40:02Again, a check!
00:40:04Give me a scotch of water straight off.
00:40:06Certainly, madam.
00:40:07Oh, and this should take care of the goddamn bill.
00:40:11Mr. E is livid.
00:40:22Someone inside our headquarters snatched a highly secret film that must be recovered.
00:40:28Yeah.
00:40:46Looking for me, Jaclyn?
00:40:50Late as usual, Banner.
00:40:52banner. Well, don't worry. I've brought along some of those gizmos you guys like to play with.
00:41:01Here's your A-48 decoder. It'll get you into the Soviet's computer room at the U.N.
00:41:07We think the film's in the safe by the main terminal room.
00:41:12God, I love these toys. Knock it off. I signed for that. Now, here's their latest printout,
00:41:18cross-referenced to gain access to the main computer. It should open the safe.
00:41:23Hopefully the film's still in there. It's with this film anyway, Jacqueline.
00:41:29Porn of movies, right? Not likely, but Mr. E's bent on getting this back into our hands.
00:41:34Says it could be a real smoking gun for the Kremlin. So they haven't even told you.
00:41:40Rather high security, Jacqueline. Rather high priority, banner.
00:41:48Touche.
00:41:52Miss Karloff, what is your location?
00:41:57I'm right outside our computer operations building. Stephen has already gone in.
00:42:03Stephen? Are you two that close?
00:42:07Please, General.
00:42:09If he's as good as his record, he might just bypass security, decode the safe, and get the film back into United States' hands.
00:42:19I agree.
00:42:25I suggest we bring in more manpower and-
00:42:27Yet, Karloff.
00:42:29I don't want anyone, not even our own people, seeing that film.
00:42:34Homrad, Mickey, that kid in the film,
00:42:38he's now an adult and one of our agents.
00:42:41He must be protected.
00:42:49I see no purpose in going on with this charade.
00:43:06In truth,
00:43:11he's no agent.
00:43:16He's my grandson,
00:43:18a psychopathic killer
00:43:19whose identity, if known to the rest,
00:43:22could prove very embarrassing to our government.
00:43:26And definitely,
00:43:28the end of my career.
00:43:31But, sir, I thought that-
00:43:32Enough said, comrade.
00:43:34Just recover that film
00:43:36and deliver it directly to me.
00:43:40Yes, sir.
00:43:40Consider it done.
00:43:42End communication.
00:43:48Goodbye, Karloff.
00:43:49And good luck.
00:44:00And good luck.
00:44:19Bye, Karloff.
00:44:49Do you want to play a game?
00:45:13Uh, no, computer.
00:45:14I do not want to play a game.
00:45:16Oh, please enter your security code, then.
00:45:37I acknowledge your authority.
00:45:40Let us begin.
00:45:41By all means.
00:45:43I'd like to know, computer,
00:45:45where the movie film
00:45:47that was recent deposit here
00:45:48is being kept.
00:45:50The motion picture film
00:45:52is being kept
00:45:53in the master safe
00:45:54in the east part of this room.
00:45:57Good.
00:45:58Computer,
00:45:59just what is on that film
00:46:01that's so damn important?
00:46:03Apparently,
00:46:03apparently,
00:46:05one of our Moscow-based generals
00:46:08had a son
00:46:10who is a psychopathic killer.
00:46:13One Christmas Eve,
00:46:14he hacked up his mother
00:46:16and his father.
00:46:17Enough.
00:46:17What the hell?
00:46:23Sir?
00:46:24Uh, nothing, computer.
00:46:26Begin sequencing
00:46:29the combination
00:46:30of the airlock safe.
00:46:34The sequencing
00:46:36to open the master safe
00:46:38has begun.
00:46:40Okay.
00:46:41Thank you, computer.
00:46:42Only ten seconds now
00:46:44until you will have access
00:46:46to the vault.
00:46:47Continue.
00:46:48Countdown.
00:46:53Five,
00:46:55four,
00:46:56three,
00:46:57two,
00:46:58and open.
00:47:05You now have two minutes.
00:47:08Good job, oh boy.
00:47:13Damn it.
00:47:18You can run.
00:47:28You can hide.
00:47:31Nothing is in your eyes.
00:47:35You recognize.
00:47:38Ah!
00:47:38Ah!
00:47:40Ah!
00:47:41Ah!
00:47:41Ah!
00:47:42Ah!
00:47:42Ah!
00:47:43Ah!
00:47:43Ah!
00:47:44Ah!
00:47:45Ah!
00:47:45Ah!
00:47:46Ah!
00:47:47Ah!
00:47:47Ah!
00:47:48Ah!
00:47:48Ah!
00:47:48Ah!
00:47:48Ah!
00:47:49Ah ah!
00:47:49Ah!
00:47:49Ah!
00:47:50Ah ah ah!
00:47:51Ah!
00:47:51Ah!
00:47:51Ah!
00:47:52Ah!
00:47:52Ah!
00:47:55Ah!
00:47:56You tailor me!
00:47:58Ah!
00:47:58You pourrzy d'emod片!
00:48:00You submit me!
00:48:01You購入 me!
00:48:02What can you do?
00:48:03Ah!
00:48:04Ah!
00:48:05Ah!
00:48:06Ah!
00:48:12Ah!
00:48:14Ah!
00:48:15Ah!
00:48:15Ah!
00:48:17Ah!
00:48:17Ah!
00:48:18He's never beaten.
00:48:22Fight!
00:48:23Fight!
00:48:23Fight!
00:48:24Your life!
00:48:26Clear!
00:48:27Clear!
00:48:28We got faith in you.
00:48:29Clear!
00:48:30Clear!
00:48:31Fire!
00:48:32Fire!
00:48:33Clear!
00:48:34Clear!
00:48:34Fire!
00:48:35Fire!
00:48:36Go away!
00:48:38Fire!
00:48:39Fire!
00:48:41Fire!
00:48:41Fire!
00:48:42Fire!
00:48:43Your life!
00:48:44Fire!
00:48:45You're turned my loose.
00:48:47We got everything else.
00:48:50Fight! Fight!
00:48:52Fight!
00:48:53Fight!
00:48:54You've got to kill.
00:48:56You've got to kill yourself.
00:48:59Fight!
00:49:01Fight!
00:49:04Fight!
00:49:17Fight!
00:49:28Ah!
00:49:37Yeah!
00:49:38Ah, Mr. Edy.
00:50:03Good timing.
00:50:04Hit it, driver.
00:50:08This is Banner.
00:50:24Catch me through the aerial surveillance.
00:50:26Yeah, this is field agent Banner.
00:50:29Getting some aerial surveillance on target heading south on 101.
00:50:37I can get the target in sight.
00:50:44Yeah, it is a motorcycle.
00:50:48Right.
00:50:49Just keep the distance and be ready to fire if necessary.
00:50:54Faster, driver.
00:50:56There's no reason that you say answer my questions.
00:51:03Don't take me away.
00:51:07Come on.
00:51:08I'm not going away.
00:51:09Come on.
00:51:10Go, go, go, go!
00:51:11That's close.
00:51:12Everybody all right?
00:51:14Oh, that was close.
00:51:26It'll be all right.
00:51:30Oh, we got it, we got it.
00:51:44No, no, hold your fire.
00:51:52I think we're OK.
00:51:55Off the screen.
00:52:04All right, good.
00:52:12That's good.
00:52:13That's good.
00:52:14Follow him, driver.
00:52:30Well, I'm afraid he's lost in matter.
00:52:36Well, maybe not.
00:52:38You know that film I even had to die, you son of a bitch?
00:52:54You, cheap son of a bitch!
00:52:56That's what you get for sticking me with a check!
00:52:59I'm not so fast, Karloff.
00:53:04You asshole!
00:53:17Of course, now that the film is gone,
00:53:20we could say we just did our part for detente, huh?
00:53:24I don't know how to land this thing!
00:53:26Oh, damn you!
00:53:28It does have a nice ass, though.
00:53:34Okay.
00:53:38I don't know how to land this thing!
00:53:42I don't know how to land this thing!
00:53:44Oh, damn you!
00:53:46It does have a nice ass, though.
00:53:50Okay.
00:53:52Okay.
00:53:54Yes?
00:53:58What?
00:54:00Put it on the screen!
00:54:06How close is our sub?
00:54:10And the Americans?
00:54:12Get our divers in the water!
00:54:14Now!
00:54:16I want that film!
00:54:18Look!
00:54:20Oh!
00:54:22Oh!
00:54:24Oh!
00:54:26Oh!
00:54:28Oh!
00:54:30Oh!
00:54:32Permission to come aboard, Corporal.
00:54:36Oh, yes, sir.
00:54:37Yes, sir, Captain Banner.
00:54:39It's Mr. Corporal, ma'am.
00:54:41Nice of you to drop in like this.
00:54:42I hope you didn't dress up on my account.
00:54:45Well, gee.
00:54:47Uh, Lieutenant.
00:54:50I've been running around a lot today.
00:54:52Marshall, sir, close your fence on target, ma'am.
00:54:54Thank you, Corporal.
00:54:55Come on, Stephen.
00:54:56Your gear is down in the torpedo room.
00:54:58This way, sir.
00:55:00Captain Lealy Bridge.
00:55:01Dive, dive.
00:55:14I'm Scott.
00:55:17Jacqueline, just what the hell is going on with this film?
00:55:21I've been going around here like a flip.
00:55:22Stephen, I'll explain everything later.
00:55:24The Russians have to be stopped at any cost.
00:55:27Understood?
00:55:28Yes, yes.
00:55:29Captain, understood.
00:55:32I am, yes, ma'am.
00:55:35Sorry, Stephen.
00:55:36Just be careful, okay?
00:55:38Those guys are acting real serious.
00:55:40Would you look at that picture?
00:55:54Would you look at that picture?
00:55:59What year is that taking, anyway?
00:56:11Still hiding your eyes in front of whining us, don't you, Stephen?
00:56:15Oh, Jacqueline, I know I didn't trust you, but I'm so happy.
00:56:22Besides, I've always been able to see right through me anyway.
00:56:26You don't pull me.
00:56:281983.
00:56:29Kyle.
00:56:31What?
00:56:31Oh, the picture, remember?
00:56:34Oh, the picture, remember?
00:56:34Operations Karnak, I believe.
00:56:37Oh, yeah.
00:56:39Well, we sure got around, didn't we?
00:56:40How did I ever let myself get involved with you, Stephen?
00:56:50We can get into the rules.
00:56:51Oh, rules, rules.
00:56:53No interpersonal relationships between agents.
00:56:56Well, Banner, those are the rules, you know.
00:56:59I know.
00:57:00The agency's rules, Jacqueline.
00:57:03Why do you think they call our unit S-O-V?
00:57:06What the hell are the...
00:57:07The hell, Mr. E.
00:57:08May I have this...
00:57:10Stephen!
00:57:11Stephen, who's here?
00:57:23The locket looks really nice on you, Stephen.
00:57:25Do you really like it?
00:57:27Of course I do.
00:57:28I love it.
00:57:30They'll be my good luck charm.
00:57:31Kind of like a gold dog tattoo, you know.
00:57:35Oh, that's the thanks I get for...
00:57:37Damn it, Jacqueline.
00:57:39I don't know why you always want to pick a fight when I gotta leave.
00:57:42It really pisses me off.
00:57:44Well, I never could compete with all your women, Beth.
00:57:47Hey, there never was a contest.
00:57:51I shouldn't be in the middle of it.
00:57:53Look, Stephen, you are what you are.
00:57:56And it feels like I'm just holding you back.
00:57:59Just holding Jacqueline.
00:58:05I'm so proud of you, Stephen James, Banner.
00:58:08You're a long-term.
00:58:10I'm always so strong.
00:58:12Tell that to my heart, George.
00:58:14Sure.
00:58:14I think if the moment is breaking,
00:58:17be sure you can't come, Jacqueline.
00:58:21What?
00:58:22To New Zealand?
00:58:23I'm afraid not, babe.
00:58:25I sure won't miss you, though.
00:58:28I'll always miss you.
00:58:37Stephen,
00:58:37I can watch you fight,
00:58:40and I can watch you win,
00:58:42but I will never watch you die.
00:58:45And that is the reality of you.
00:58:47That sometimes,
00:58:48some place in the world,
00:58:50when you let your guard down,
00:58:52some places assassin will kill you.
00:58:55And I think I'd rather not be there for that scene,
00:58:58if you don't mind, darling.
00:58:59And I'll...
00:59:06This is to select air.
00:59:09That's my presentation.
00:59:10Fly switch to air.
00:59:11That's my presentation.
00:59:12Fly switch to air.
00:59:13LCP-1I.
00:59:15That's my mission.
00:59:16Ship's hovering mode and missile launch.
00:59:185-Nav weapons.
00:59:19Navigation fire control.
00:59:20Transmitted set.
00:59:21Completed.
00:59:21Start at cycling.
00:59:23Also, they select training fire.
00:59:25Weapons, you have permission to fire.
00:59:27You have permission to fire, I can.
00:59:29Weapons time.
00:59:30You have permission to fire.
00:59:31Down there, Scope.
00:59:32And fire.
00:59:33I want.
00:59:34I want.
00:59:58I want.
01:00:02I want.
01:00:03You have permission to fire.
01:00:04Weapons time.
01:00:04Weapons time.
01:00:04Weapons time.
01:00:05Weapons time.
01:00:11Weapons time.
01:00:11Weapons time.
01:00:12Weapons time.
01:00:13There might be a waste.
01:00:14Weapons time.
01:00:15Weapons time.
01:00:16I don't know.
01:00:46Oh, my God.
01:01:16Ladies and gentlemen, we have at great cost
01:01:36to recover the film that Mr. E. here so desperately wanted.
01:01:39Why, thank you, Captain Banner.
01:01:41I assure you, sir, your efforts will not go unrecognized.
01:01:45After viewing it, though, sir, I must say that this snuff movie
01:01:49Detective Brody obtained appears at first glance
01:01:52to be nothing more than one of those awful holiday horror movies
01:01:55we see in the theaters.
01:01:56But, of course, as all of us know in this room, the murders are real.
01:02:01Certainly, it does reveal the identity of a very sick little boy
01:02:04and mainly that the killer is the grandson
01:02:07of one of Russia's most premier generals.
01:02:11A very damaging piece of blackmail.
01:02:13But if you want my opinion, Mr. E., and I'm sure that you do,
01:02:18I think in the spirit of glasnost and the friendship
01:02:21that we're now experiencing between our two countries,
01:02:24you should destroy this little film
01:02:25and put our agency to better use next time.
01:02:27That's enough, Captain.
01:02:29Banner, that's just not your call.
01:02:31All right, well, if you'll excuse me, I do have a plane to catch.
01:02:35Oh, and I hope you're amused at this clever little piece of satire.
01:02:39But think hard about what you're going to do with this film.
01:02:43It was up to me.
01:02:44Quite frankly, I would burn it.
01:02:47Good day, gentlemen, ladies, detective, Mr. E., enjoy.
01:02:55If you all remember, in the opening segment of this film,
01:03:02the young boy had just killed his mother and her lover.
01:03:07And that was in 1965.
01:03:10A detective, Brody, here, had put him away.
01:03:13In the next portion, you'll see that young Mickey is back in action,
01:03:17only now he's quite grown up
01:03:19and very, very deadly.
01:03:26Just roll the film, Brody.
01:03:47Hi, Janie.
01:03:48You're just in time.
01:03:51Bobby's over here.
01:03:53Look, Bobby, Janie's here.
01:03:55I know.
01:03:56Hi, Bobby.
01:03:56Hi.
01:03:58Gosh, Mrs. Brown, what a beautiful tree.
01:04:00This year looks like Christmas in here.
01:04:02Thanks, Janie.
01:04:03Look, here's 20 bucks for pizza in case you get hungry.
01:04:07That should cover a tip, too.
01:04:09I'll be out real late tonight
01:04:10and see that he doesn't get into his presents, okay?
01:04:14I know.
01:04:15No problem, Mrs. Brown.
01:04:16Bobby and I will be just fine.
01:04:18Bobby, now don't make a mess.
01:04:20I just had the place cleaned.
01:04:21I know.
01:04:23Ciao, everyone.
01:04:28Bye for the show.
01:04:29Bye for the show.
01:04:31Sorry.
01:04:34Ciao, baby.
01:04:39How's that?
01:04:41Nice job.
01:04:42I think I got him.
01:04:43I don't know.
01:04:46Relax.
01:04:50Don't get so bent out of shape.
01:04:52No.
01:04:53I just love him so much.
01:04:54They said that he wasn't even you.
01:04:56Sure.
01:04:56Just when I thought it was safe to come back into this apartment.
01:04:59Yeah, I knew you were going to say this.
01:05:01Sure you did.
01:05:02I had this really freaky dream about this big red moon, and it was just bleeding all over
01:05:08me.
01:05:08It was so gross.
01:05:10You know, I get crazy when there's a full moon.
01:05:13You mean, you mean you get crazy?
01:05:14You're nuts, honey.
01:05:15I got it.
01:05:18I got a word that's just going to kill you.
01:05:20Oh, yeah?
01:05:21Yeah.
01:05:21Try it.
01:05:22How do you spell fornicate?
01:05:24Fornicate?
01:05:24That's easy.
01:05:26F?
01:05:27You got that?
01:05:28Yeah.
01:05:28O.
01:05:28You got that?
01:05:29You got that?
01:05:31You got that?
01:05:33But, Jamie, I'm not sleepy.
01:05:35Shh, Bobby.
01:05:37Now you just close your eyes and get some rest.
01:05:40I'll try to get these people out of here as soon as I can.
01:05:43Remember, Santa's coming tonight.
01:05:45I do.
01:05:46As strange and amusing as this might appear, keep in mind that every murder you see on this
01:05:56film is real.
01:05:58Rumors have it that a series of so-called snuff films were made using easily manipulated
01:06:04mental patients to commit actual murders.
01:06:08This particular film our experts have documented is absolutely authentic.
01:06:13And more important, the identity of this killer is what is of interest to us.
01:06:21Great interest.
01:06:43Figures.
01:06:49Figures.
01:06:54Figures.
01:06:59Figures.
01:07:37Who is it?
01:07:38Who is there?
01:08:02Attention.
01:08:03Attention all units.
01:08:04This is an all-points bulletin for a heavyset man reportedly dressed in a red suit, black boots, white beard, and possibly armed...
01:08:13And a tiny reindeer.
01:08:15The suspect escaped tonight from Sunnydale Sanitarium. His name is Mickey Schultz. His alias. Get this gag. It's Kris Kringle.
01:08:28So it's back in town now. A real nut. You know what, Anderson?
01:08:35What, Brody?
01:08:37About 20 years ago, he killed his mother and his old man with a butcher knife on Christmas Eve. I never saw so much blood in my life. And I'll never forget it either.
01:08:49Watch it, Brody. A red light.
01:08:51Fuck, um, I'm a cop. Anyway, we went in. And we found the two of them laying there, cacked up like a side of beef. And that little monster's standing there with a knife in his hands.
01:09:06My partner, Kelly, he started puking. He started puking his guts out all over the place.
01:09:14Uh, excuse me, Brody. I think we should acknowledge that APB.
01:09:17Don't worry about it, Anderson. I got my own way of finding this one. One looking to his dead black eyes, and I'll know him.
01:09:30He's a stone nut. Ever since he saw his mama kissing Santa Claus, he's been crazy ever since. You know what, Anderson?
01:09:38When the doctors examined the kid's head, they found dog shit for brains.
01:09:44Thank you, Detective, for that illuminating and tasteful description of the murder.
01:09:51Shall we proceed?
01:09:53The next brutal murder takes place here.
01:09:55Hey, man. What's going on?
01:10:10Shoot, I'll check it. I gotta do everything myself.
01:10:25��'t you, son.
01:10:27Show me the beat.
01:10:28I'll see you later.
01:10:29I'll see you later.
01:10:30Give it to speed.
01:10:31I'll see you later.
01:10:33I'll show you later.
01:10:34Look.
01:10:37You're talking that you're moving.
01:10:38You're康ing.
01:10:40You're doing fun.
01:10:43You're doing fun.
01:10:45You're doing fun.
01:10:47You're doing fun.
01:10:49You're taking fun.
01:10:51You're doing fun.
01:10:53You're doing fun.
01:10:54Well, I guess that's graphic enough to give us the general idea.
01:11:22Obviously, our murderer is quite mad, and he continues killing until there's only one girl left.
01:11:38Mmm. Want some?
01:11:40Mmm, yeah. Oh, minute. I gotta pee.
01:11:45Hey, watch your mouth. You're gonna have to learn how to talk more like a lady.
01:11:52Hey, Sherry! Get a load of this!
01:12:07Fire out!
01:12:09My baby does it, okay?
01:12:16Swish-splash!
01:12:21Swish-splash!
01:12:35Are you looking?
01:12:36I'm looking at it!
01:12:58John! What's all the racket going on?
01:12:59What's all the racket going on?
01:13:02Oh, the tub.
01:13:29Billy, did you hear that?
01:13:39Oh, it's probably just Sherry.
01:13:41She's a moaner.
01:13:42Yeah, how would you know?
01:13:45Billy, hurry.
01:13:46I think you better go see what's wrong.
01:13:47No way, Jose.
01:13:48Please.
01:13:56I better call the police.
01:13:59Me.
01:14:00Me.
01:14:01Me.
01:14:02Me.
01:14:03Me.
01:14:04Me.
01:14:05Me.
01:14:06Me.
01:14:07Me.
01:14:08Me.
01:14:09Me.
01:14:10Me.
01:14:11Me.
01:14:12Me.
01:14:13Me.
01:14:14Me.
01:14:23Oh, my God, the phone's dead.
01:14:26So am I.
01:14:29Me.
01:14:30Me.
01:14:31Me.
01:14:32I'll just fast forward this to get to the end.
01:14:35Me.
01:14:36Me.
01:14:37Me.
01:14:38Me.
01:14:39Me.
01:14:40Me.
01:14:41Me.
01:14:42Me.
01:14:43Me.
01:14:44Me.
01:14:45Me.
01:14:46Me.
01:14:47Me.
01:14:48me.
01:14:49Me.
01:14:50me.
01:14:51me.
01:14:52me.
01:14:53Me.
01:14:54me.
01:14:55Me.
01:14:56me.
01:14:57me.
01:14:58me.
01:14:59me.
01:15:00me.
01:15:01me.
01:15:02me.
01:15:03me.
01:15:04me.
01:15:05me.
01:15:06me.
01:15:07me.
01:15:08me.
01:15:09me.
01:15:10me.
01:15:11me.
01:15:12me.
01:15:13me.
01:15:14me.
01:15:15me.
01:15:16me.
01:15:17me.
01:15:18me.
01:15:19me.
01:15:20me.
01:15:21me.
01:15:22me.
01:15:23me.
01:15:24me.
01:15:25me.
01:15:26me.
01:15:27Oh, my God.
01:15:57It's okay, Miss. Brody's in charge now.
01:16:20Oh, no, you're not, Detective.
01:16:22As a matter of fact, with this film in the hands of SOB, we are very clearly in charge.
01:16:32It is our intention to leak the information to the KGB and let them take care of their own.
01:16:39It keeps our hands clean of all that messy business and gets rid of an adversary at the same time.
01:16:47Now you know why it was so important to obtain this evidence.
01:16:56Right, Mr. E. Now you know, and soon the whole world will know that my grandson grew up to be a very sick man.
01:17:15The last part is, he's still out there.
01:17:22Okay.
01:17:24Okay.
01:17:24Okay.
01:17:25Okay.
01:17:26Okay.
01:17:27Okay.
01:17:28Okay.
01:17:29Okay.
01:17:31Okay.
01:17:32Let's go.
01:17:44You're really very good, Stephen James Banner.
01:18:04You know, having this picnic was a great idea.
01:18:06Well, I'm just full of great ideas, Fanchella.
01:18:09Such as man?
01:18:10Such as a little more champagne.
01:18:13Please, that crazy story you were telling me about that Mickey character, is it really true?
01:18:19Ah, classified, darling.
01:18:21In fact, I really shouldn't say no more about it.
01:18:23What if he was still alive?
01:18:25Wouldn't you be in danger?
01:18:26I mean, you were responsible for his cop at death.
01:18:29Well, I suppose I do have to take that chance, don't I?
01:18:34Get down, Fanchella.
01:18:36Jesus.
01:18:37Franchella.
01:18:38It's only...
01:18:39Jack on me.
01:18:40Just saving your ass again.
01:18:41And it is such a nice ass, Stephen.
01:18:42That little Franchella of yours just happens to be working at the Soviet Embassy down here at the
01:18:43Ivory's.
01:18:44That should be back in Washington by now, Lieutenant.
01:18:45Stephen, work is in everything you know.
01:18:46People do change.
01:18:47You're not kidding.
01:18:48I don't know.
01:18:49You're not kidding.
01:18:50I don't know.
01:18:51I don't know.
01:18:52You're not kidding.
01:18:53Stephen, it's so good to see you again.
01:18:55But darling, I thought you and me, this wasn't supposed to happen.
01:19:00No, it's not supposed to happen.
01:19:02He's just really used to be living in the Soviet is to be working at the Soviet Embassy down here at the Ivory's.
01:19:07Oh, you're not kidding.
01:19:17Steven, it's so good to see you again.
01:19:19But, darling, I thought you and me, this wasn't supposed to happen.
01:19:23Oh, shut up and kiss me.
01:19:25I thought that was my life, guys.
01:19:27Oh, say love me.
01:19:37You got me walking on a ledge in the darkest part of night.
01:19:46I'm standing at the edge with so much laughter and knowing you're walking.
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