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00:00Did you bring protection?
00:11I consent to this.
00:14I consent to this.
00:23That was surprisingly nice.
00:28Oh, yeah.
00:30No.
00:30Hold on.
00:32Five stars, huh?
00:35You're leaving?
00:37I thought you said we would talk after.
00:39Oh, we're talking.
00:41We're agreeing to give each other five stars.
00:44That's talking, right?
00:45Wow.
00:46Uh, OK.
00:51So?
00:51Whoa.
01:03You would have given me six stars if you could have, huh?
01:06Uh-huh.
01:06Uh-huh.
01:15Uh-huh.
01:16Byron said, hair shorter than pigs.
01:32Four stars?
01:33Clingy vibe?
01:35Four stars?
01:38Entitled motherfucker.
01:43Hey!
01:44Asshole!
01:44Asshole!
01:55Delete nightly app.
01:56Mr. Brown?
02:06Mr. Brown
02:18Mr. Brown
02:23Hey, I have mandatory pet therapy
02:34because I tried to kill myself yesterday
02:37Oh, Mr. Brown
02:38Well, one of our floofers or puppers will cheer you up
02:42Take your pick
02:42Okay
02:47Hey, man
02:55Oh, hey
02:57You want Ernie?
02:58He's awesome, and I'm done
02:59No, I was gonna do
03:00Oh, okay, yeah
03:01Okay
03:02Thank you
03:04Yeah
03:08Why are they programming the shit?
03:12Hey, Ernie
03:13You're a little cutie
03:14Yeah
03:16So I understand you were in a bad place yesterday
03:18You want to talk about it?
03:21Uh, okay
03:23Do I keep petting you, or?
03:27It's only weird if you make it weird
03:29Jay
03:33I've never done therapy
03:36Although my girlfriend started last year
03:38Interesting
03:39So I'm supposed to do what, exactly?
03:42Let's start with why you were gonna throw yourself in the torrent
03:45Right, the torrent
03:46I guess I...
03:50Also, this session's being recorded for quality purposes
03:53Go on
03:54I had a great life
03:58I was young, healthy
04:00Great body
04:01Great face
04:02Great hair
04:04Great skin
04:05Great teeth
04:06Great eyes
04:07Great abs
04:08Great...
04:08Sounds like you had every kind of privilege
04:10And you never questioned it
04:11And bam
04:12Self-driving car crash
04:13That's not fair
04:14Now I live in this weird fantasy world
04:16Of my girlfriend's grandma
04:18Life's not fair
04:19And neither is digital life extension
04:21What's fair
04:22And what should happen
04:23That's just in your head
04:25Super
04:26You have to make your own meaning
04:28What makes life worth living
04:30For you
04:30You're petting me extremely hard right now
04:34Sorry, you're stressing me out
04:35What's the meaning of life in ten seconds?
04:38Come on
04:38Think of it as your bare minimum
04:39What do you need so you won't dive into that thing?
04:44I guess I just still want to be a man
04:47What does that mean?
04:49Good question
04:49I want to be independent
04:54And capable
04:56When you're young
04:58People have to do everything for you
05:00And then you grow up
05:01And you become a man
05:03And people rely on you
05:05Kids look up to you
05:06Women want to be with you
05:08You know?
05:10I had that
05:11I was on my way to that
05:15Hmm
05:16I'm going to give you an assignment
05:19Talk to at least five of your fellow uploads
05:23Take notes
05:23Then find me
05:25And maybe you made a friend
05:26Who makes it all feel worth it
05:28I'll just wipe this off first
05:40Myra, I have a drone follow you everywhere
05:44And every single day
05:46You give her sweets in the park
05:48Now today
05:49Get her to eat
05:50The Rachel Ray Jr. steamed squash
05:53I printed this morning
05:54And nothing else
05:55Or I will fire you
05:58Should I come back later?
06:03No, it's fine
06:04Come in
06:05I met with my bank
06:06And they approved the loan
06:08For my dad's upload
06:09Yay
06:09As long as my employer
06:11That's you
06:12Confirms in writing
06:14That I qualify for the employee discount
06:15What was wrong with him again?
06:18Dad has vape lung
06:20He thought it was safer than smoking
06:22Then all the studies came out
06:23I thought he didn't believe in upload
06:25Well, he's still being a bit of a lud about it
06:28But, um
06:28You know, when he sees I've spent the money
06:30You know, I don't feel comfortable signing this
06:32You need a 4.6 employee rating
06:34To qualify for that discount
06:36Right now you're at 4.598, so
06:38Come on, I'm, I'm, I'm so close
06:41Here's what I'll do
06:44You could hit a 4.6 today
06:47But then you could slip under tomorrow
06:48You hit a 4.8
06:50And I'll sign this letter as written, no prob
06:53But I, I just need you to start it
06:56Those are my rules
06:57Hey, bud
07:18Shh
07:18I'm Nathan, I'm new
07:21Sirius, shut up
07:22Is anyone looking for me?
07:24No, coast is clear
07:31Oh
07:37Oh, shit
07:42Thanks a lot
07:43What?
07:46What the hell?
07:48Ow!
07:50Shut up, you little
07:51Fuck
07:53Uh, Angel
07:54Hey
07:56What the hell is going on here?
07:57Did I do this?
07:58Ow!
07:59Ow!
08:03No
08:03Dylan's been here for years
08:05He fell off a cliff on a school trip
08:07He gets bored
08:08So he has all the AI guys set to Street Fighter in game mode
08:10Game mode
08:12Cool
08:13How are you?
08:15Feeling better today?
08:17Yeah
08:17Yeah, a little
08:18Uh, I have a special assignment for my therapist
08:20It's called the five people you've eaten up with
08:22Those are mine, mine, mine, mine
08:23I need to go around and
08:24Introduce myself to
08:25Those are mine
08:26Five of the other
08:26Mine, mine, mine, mine, mine
08:27I don't know, I guess he thinks communications
08:29Back off
08:29Hello?
08:32Nora, did I lose you?
08:34You know, just don't have any expectations
08:36Then you won't get disappointed
08:38No, not me
08:39You get what you expect in life
08:40So I expect the best
08:41Well, I'm sure you'll get the best here at Horizon Lakeview
08:44Is there anything else?
08:46Did I say something wrong?
08:47As your customer service representative
08:48It is my job to be of service with any issues
08:51Are there any specific issues?
08:54No
08:55Thank you for using Horizon
08:57God, you are a sight for sore eyes
09:13I'm so sorry I didn't call you back today, babe
09:15Non-stop funeral planning
09:17There's so much to do before tonight
09:19Flowers, gift bags
09:21Well, maybe I can help from here
09:22I'm sure there's a ton of meaningful stuff you could do
09:25But don't get mad at me
09:26I did it all already
09:27Hold still
09:29Ow!
09:30What was that?
09:31It's just stem cells
09:32I can't wait to upload so I don't have to work this hard
09:35You're so lucky
09:36I'm sorry
09:40I don't mean that the way that it sounded
09:43No, you're right
09:44It is nice here
09:46Vaginaplasty, miss?
09:48Come again?
09:49Um, I'm getting ready for my boyfriend's funeral
09:51So
09:52No?
09:54Yeah
09:54No
09:55Wow
09:57After the funeral tonight
09:59You want to rent a VR sex suit?
10:01Sleepover?
10:02Duh
10:02Yes
10:04There's a shop on Melrose with amazing Yelp reviews
10:07I need you to close your eyes and mouth
10:09Oh
10:10Babe, she's putting bees on my face
10:12Gotta go
10:13Love you
10:14Love you too
10:15Bye
10:15They're really mad today
10:22Fung, pa, fung, pa
10:31Now everybody
10:32Have you heard
10:34If you're in the game
10:37Then the stroke's the word
10:39Winner, winner, win
10:41Grab your bow
10:47Lem
10:49Wimp, win-ö
10:50Stroke man, schoke man
10:52Koobie, winner, boy who
10:54Why not
10:54Stroke man, differently
10:57Deh, deh, deh, deh, deh, deh
11:00Hey, yeah, what the hell?
11:12I thought we said 10.30.
11:15You told me to meet you at the courts, man.
11:18I'm here and I don't see you anywhere.
11:30So, what's in the news?
11:35Um, I'm not Siri, so look up your own news.
11:39Yeah, yeah, you're not Siri.
11:41Because who'd program Siri to be so grumpy?
11:45I don't have to smile for you.
11:47I'm on break.
11:51Just have stuff on my mind.
11:54Shitty nightly last night?
11:56Insulting.
11:57Uh, I'm not discussing my nightly hookups with you.
12:00Look up your own damn porn.
12:02Hey, I have no earthly needs anymore.
12:03I was asking out of a purely spiritual desire to help.
12:06But you're joking, right?
12:08Because you're supposed to continue to have earthly needs.
12:11Lack of sexual interest is a sign of depression.
12:14Yes, I was joking.
12:15And everything works okay?
12:17I mean, I'm required to ask.
12:20You can still, uh...
12:22Look up your own damn porn.
12:23Oh, please. Yeah, right.
12:26Is there anything left to talk about?
12:28Because I have 47 other clients.
12:30So what? Let them wait.
12:31We're all dead here anyway.
12:36Angel!
12:37Angel!
12:38I'm stuck in my closet!
12:41Fixing that, yes ma'am.
12:43Happy to provide five-star service.
12:44Are you sure you're okay?
12:51I'll be fine.
12:54So, what big plans today?
12:57Water aerobics?
12:59Golf?
13:00Oh, me?
13:00I have homework from a dog.
13:02And tonight, my own funeral simulcasted Lakeview, New York, and L.A.
13:06So, yeah, same old, same old.
13:11Well, if you need me for personal shopping, technical service, or wrapping up a bunch of finished business,
13:18you know, whatever.
13:19I'm a resource.
13:20Use me!
13:23Right.
13:24So.
13:24Hey.
13:52Cool boots.
13:53Yeah.
13:56I'm Nathan. I live across the hall.
14:00Hey, you look familiar.
14:02Do you play the mayor in Robocop?
14:04No.
14:06I'm David Choke.
14:08Of, like, the Choke brothers?
14:11Yeah.
14:12We live on the same floor?
14:14That's weird.
14:15Well, I've got 25,000 square feet
14:18and a 12-acre backyard once you go through that door.
14:22So, I suppose it is a little weird.
14:25What did you do?
14:26A game designer. Yeah, freeware.
14:29And a little modeling in college.
14:30I mean, it's no big deal.
14:31Mostly catalog work, a couple commercials.
14:33Not much money in freeware.
14:35No.
14:36And what did you do?
14:39Oh, not much.
14:41Just co-ran the second largest privately owned company in the world
14:44and influenced American politics for a generation.
14:48Yeah, no, I know.
14:49So, these free games, anything with duck hunting?
14:54No.
14:55My friend and I are making an app.
14:56It's called...
14:59Sorry, I'm blanking on the name.
15:06You're blanking on the name of your own app?
15:08Yeah, I've been having some memory gaps.
15:13I guess I'm just a little death-lagged.
15:15We wrote a program that allows anyone to save their own uploads.
15:19So you can create your own digital afterlife
15:21and pass it down to friends and family for free.
15:24So you got murdered?
15:25No, I was in a car accident.
15:31Yeah, sure.
15:33You just threatened a $600 billion a year industry
15:36and no one murdered you.
15:42Nobody murders anybody.
15:44Okay, well, he sucks.
15:53This dog better know what it's doing.
15:57Good morning, Mr. Brown.
15:59Where to?
16:01Uh, actually, Cara, this is Fran Booth.
16:03I've been asked by the Brown family
16:05to investigate the November 24th crash.
16:07Do you know where you are?
16:104,499 Spaulding.
16:13Correct.
16:15Damage scan, please?
16:16No damage to report.
16:19You are clearly very damaged?
16:22No.
16:23Okay, go on.
16:24Uh, pull up dash cam footage
16:26from 11 to 11.37 p.m. on the night of the crash?
16:29Can't find anything.
16:30But you were in motion,
16:33so your cameras were activated.
16:35Who are you again?
16:37Where are the recordings?
16:41Interesting.
17:00Hi.
17:05You look a little lost.
17:06Can I help you?
17:07Hi.
17:07Yes.
17:08Um, I'm looking to rent a sex suit.
17:10It's my boyfriend's funeral tonight,
17:12and I want it to be special for him.
17:14Well, you know how they work, right?
17:17The fingers on the inside inflate,
17:19and since everything's better wet,
17:21just use it in the tub.
17:23Did you say fingers?
17:24Setup can be fun because everything's adjustable.
17:27You can make him hung like a horse,
17:29add chest hair, whatever.
17:30He can even give you bigger boobs,
17:32extra boobs, whatever you want.
17:35They really clean them well.
17:36Oh, God, yeah, we have to.
17:38You wouldn't believe what we pull out of them sometimes.
17:40It's not just a sex suit.
17:42Old people want to hug their grandkids,
17:44and the kids throw up in there.
17:47Oh, people think they can do anything in a rental.
17:50Hey, where are you going?
17:51Hey.
17:53Nora.
17:56I mean, Angel.
17:57Seriously?
17:58I do have other clients.
17:59Hey, um, I thought of something
18:01maybe you can help me with.
18:02I can't remember everything.
18:04Well, everybody forgets stuff.
18:05Yeah, but shouldn't I know the name of the project
18:07I was working on last week?
18:09Wait, you don't?
18:10No, I mean, maybe there wasn't enough storage space,
18:13or I don't want to sound paranoid,
18:14but what if something was edited?
18:16I mean, I can remember my high school prom,
18:17but I used to know every word to the big song we danced to,
18:20and now nothing, okay?
18:21It's just blank.
18:23That must be scary.
18:24Fuck, yeah.
18:25It is.
18:26It's like, you know, am I still me
18:27if something's missing,
18:29and is it just random what I'm forgetting?
18:31I have this awful feeling like I left the gas on.
18:35You know, like whatever I'm forgetting
18:37could just blow up my family.
18:40Yikes.
18:42I'm sorry.
18:43Hey, what song?
18:44What?
18:45What was your big prom song?
18:47Uptown Funk.
18:48Ha, me too.
18:51Um, okay.
18:55This hit, that ice cold,
18:57Michelle Pfeiffer, that white gold.
19:00Anything?
19:01Go on.
19:03This one for them good girls,
19:05them hood girls,
19:06straight masterpieces.
19:07Stylin', wildin',
19:09livin' up in the city.
19:11Got Chuck's song with Saint Laurent.
19:14Gotta kiss myself, I'm so pretty.
19:16Too hot, hot damn.
19:17Call the police and the fireman.
19:20Too hot, hot damn.
19:22Say my name, you know who I am.
19:24Girls hit, hallelujah.
19:26Ooh, girls hit, hallelujah.
19:27Ooh, girls hit, hallelujah.
19:29Cause Uptown Funk gonna give it to you.
19:32Cause Uptown Funk gonna give it to you.
19:33Saturday night, we in the spot.
19:35Don't believe you just watch it.
19:37Dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun.
19:38Ooh, shit.
19:39Gotta go.
19:42No, damn.
19:46Hey, I'm Nathan.
19:47I'm new here.
19:49Well, I see you've really made yourself at home.
19:51Okay, don't like him either.
20:03Hey, remember that hot douchebag?
20:06The one that almost jumped yesterday?
20:07He might actually be a good guy.
20:12You assembled every one of his memories.
20:15Wouldn't you know if he was for real?
20:16Yeah, but weirdly, some of his .mem files are damaged.
20:22Ah.
20:23Oh, I feel you.
20:25I wasn't paying attention yesterday,
20:26and I put this hipster woman's experience
20:29of natural childbirth into an old male judge.
20:32Freaked him the fuck out.
20:35Jesus, Misha.
20:36Whatever you do, do not tell Duda what the fuck up.
20:40He'll give you zero stars,
20:41and you can't afford to lose this job.
20:43Well, neither can you.
20:44Uh, I have my dog walking gig,
20:46I do hair, and I'm the night manager for La For Hilel.
20:49I'll survive.
20:54Angel!
20:55Oh, my God!
20:56Hey, Dylan.
21:04Finally, Angel.
21:06None of these computers work.
21:08I can't get through to my best friend, Breck.
21:10I've tried voice, text, video.
21:13Nothing works.
21:15Okay, I'll call an IRL
21:17and figure out how to get you connected.
21:19Get ready to give me five stars.
21:21We'll see.
21:22Dylan was my best friend
21:24in seventh grade,
21:25and I'm sorry he died,
21:28but he's still 11,
21:29and I'm 18 now.
21:31I don't want Pokemon anymore.
21:33Look, I understand.
21:34I want pussy.
21:35Dude.
21:36Really?
21:37You know, friends do drift apart.
21:41No.
21:42Not my best friend.
21:43Not Breck.
21:44You're messing up somehow.
21:47Yeah.
21:49Probably.
21:50You tried your best.
21:52It just wasn't good enough.
21:55Wait, let me...
21:56Sorry.
21:56Sorry.
21:57Yeah, I'm, uh...
22:02Disappointed, too.
22:03It's too easy.
22:20Dart around more
22:21and make duck sounds.
22:23Quack!
22:25Quack!
22:26Quack!
22:28Quack!
22:29You're doing good!
22:30Three stars?
22:37Come on, man!
22:44Angel!
22:45What?
22:45What do you want?
22:52What do you need?
22:56Thanks.
22:57That's nice.
22:58Nice.
23:00Okay, I'm not sure what I did to deserve that,
23:03but it's nice to get.
23:06You've got to be breaking the rules or something,
23:08because I'm sure you're not supposed to keep
23:10giving me five stars for nothing.
23:15All right, I should do something to earn these.
23:21Ta-da!
23:21Hey, seriously, what can I do for you?
23:32Just ask me anything.
23:33You know what you can do for me?
23:35You can tell me what's wrong,
23:36because you've been all like...
23:37All day.
23:39You've got an hour?
23:46I have infinity.
23:48Well, you know, in one sense,
23:49it's just as bad as nightly.
23:50You know, you have to keep pleasing people,
23:52and you can't let your numbers down.
23:53Emotional work is real work.
23:55Yeah, exactly.
23:56And I can't walk away from the job.
23:58Why not?
23:58My dad.
23:59My dad's dying.
24:00Oh, God, I'm sorry.
24:01Yeah, it sucks.
24:02And my mom died unexpectedly a few years ago.
24:05Oh.
24:05Exactly, and Dad doesn't think heaven
24:08could be heaven without Mom in it,
24:09which means he's basically okay
24:11with not being with me,
24:13which I might find romantic
24:14if it wasn't so insulting.
24:17But really, I just feel like he's clinically depressed
24:19and not thinking straight.
24:20I mean, so he isn't saving anything for upload.
24:23That's just all on me.
24:24I mean, he might not even use it if I pay for it.
24:26I guess my biggest fear is
24:36he'll die too.
24:40And my last connection to childhood
24:43is just gone.
24:46And I won't ever find anyone
24:50who understands me like that
24:53or loves me unconditionally.
24:59Yeah.
25:03Whew.
25:06Well, thanks.
25:10You feel a lot better.
25:13I didn't do anything but listen.
25:14Listen.
25:16Pretend I'm giving you five stars.
25:41I'm at five new uploads today
25:43and I didn't like any of them.
25:44You do seem less stressed, though.
25:47Well, the staff is nice.
25:52So, no more killing yourself?
25:54Not today.
25:55And I can't tonight.
25:56I have my funeral.
25:58So, see ya!
25:59I have your wedding.
26:11Bye.
26:12Bye.
26:21Bye.
26:23Bye.
26:23Bye.
26:23Oh, my God.
26:53I know.
26:55I think it went okay.
26:56I fucking froze.
26:58You were good.
26:59I'll admit,
27:00we have beyond believe your income shouldn't determine your digital afterlife.
27:03Where'd you get that economic inequality rap?
27:05It's just the truth, man.
27:06Great stuff.
27:07Inspired tap dancing, brother.
27:08You think cavern investments will bite?
27:10Christ.
27:12Our next pitch is it for three weeks.
27:14Gentlemen.
27:15Has anyone heard your idea?
27:18Anyone from the big companies?
27:19Uh, I mean, just our families and my girlfriend.
27:22Good.
27:23Don't tell anyone else.
27:24We're ready to take this full round ourselves.
27:26We're ready to take this full round of applause.
27:28We're ready to take this full round of applause.
27:29We're ready to take this full round of applause.
27:30We're ready to take this full round of applause.
27:31We're ready to take this full round of applause.
27:32We're ready to take this full round of applause.
27:33We're ready to take this full round of applause.
27:34We're ready to take this full round of applause.
27:35We're ready to take this full round of applause.
27:36We're ready to take this full round of applause.
27:37We're ready to take this full round of applause.
27:38We're ready to take this full round of applause.
27:39We're ready to take this full round of applause.
27:40We're ready to take this full round of applause.
27:41We're ready to take this full round of applause.
Recommandations
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