- 2 months ago
Holiday Engagement
Category
🎥
Short filmTranscript
00:00Us, Hillary.
00:02I don't think we're gonna work.
00:04What?
00:06Look, I need a partner in life.
00:09A wife who's going to go where I need to go and do what I need to do and be excited about my accomplishments.
00:14I can't get dragged down by somebody who's out saving dogs and cats and God knows what else.
00:20Jason, is this about moving to Pittsburgh? I'll move to Pittsburgh.
00:26A new VP position opened up in our Pittsburgh office and I guarantee I am the top pick for this position.
00:32We have a life here.
00:34What am I gonna do in Pittsburgh?
00:38Look, I just, I have to stay focused and mobile to advance in my career.
00:42I gotta keep my priorities straight.
00:44Believe me, this is one of those tough decisions, but it's for the best.
00:48For both of us. I just, I can't make a mistake.
00:51Not now.
00:56What did I become? A mistake.
01:03Just...
01:05I have to get this. Just, just, just...
01:07Go for change.
01:10No, no, no. That is exactly how you...
01:12He's a jerk. I knew he was too good to be true.
01:17Maybe my mom was right. Maybe I let him keep one foot out the door.
01:20Alright, it's time to pick the winner for this week's KJWM Weekly Holiday Vacation Giveaway.
01:25And the lucky winner is... Hillary Burns.
01:28Oh my God, you won!
01:31We are finally in the running for our trip to Mexico. It could be our honeymoon!
01:34What?
01:35All of my sisters found perfect men, and I can't even get one in the door.
01:40Is that it?
01:42Is that what would make you happy right now, to bring home a man for Thanksgiving?
01:46I just can't go home all alone. I just can't face it. I can't do it. Not now.
01:49Okay. Look. All you have to do, just post this with a flirty little intro video of your pretty face, and voila.
01:59All you have to do is click. I'll help you do the video.
02:03You really think it's a good idea to bring a stranger home, or possibly a psycho, to my parents' house for Thanksgiving?
02:10Hillary, I just wanted you to know I planned a small family gathering at the house for when you and Jason arrive.
02:17Do it.
02:18What?
02:19Of course, if he preferred white.
02:22Hi.
02:23Hi.
02:24Hi.
02:25Hi. My name is Hillary.
02:27I need to hire a fake fiancé to bring home to my family for Thanksgiving.
02:32In return, you will receive two free first class tickets to Playa del Carmen, Mexico.
02:37So just record a quick video intro, post it to this page, and we'll get back to you.
02:41Whoa!
02:42What? Who is it? Come in.
02:43I can't believe it. Look at all of these.
02:44All right. Mexico's got some sweetest waves, man. I mean, after the weekend's over here, we can just serve, sun, serve, eat, serve, and then serve some more.
03:06I do have irritable bowel syndrome, but I really need to get to Mexico.
03:12Let's get to Mexico.
03:21Ooh.
03:24Huh.
03:27No.
03:31Ugh. I knew this was a bad idea.
03:33Come over here.
03:34No!
03:35No.
03:36No.
03:37I don't want to.
03:38Just talk to him. He's cute. He kind of looks like Jason.
03:41Hello.
03:42Hi. Is everything okay over there?
03:44Depending on what you mean by okay. Everything's great.
03:47Why don't you tell us a bit about yourself?
03:49Oh. Okay. My name is David. I'm an actor.
03:52Hey, wait. I know you.
03:54Hey, wait. I know you. You're the cell phone guy in the costume.
04:00That's just sad.
04:01He's our first interview. Come on. Let's go.
04:04Ugh.
04:05Hi. Excuse me.
04:06Oh. Oh. Oh.
04:07I'm sorry. I'm sorry.
04:09Hi. I said acting is my full-time job, and today I'm playing a large cell phone.
04:14Oh, crap. I knew it. Come on. We gotta go back to Seattle.
04:17That's right. And you're the reporter?
04:20Yeah.
04:21I was sorry to hear about the newspaper shutting down. Did you lose your job, or?
04:25What do you think?
04:26Right. Sorry. Obvious.
04:29Uh, for what it's worth, I got fired playing a big red cell phone, so.
04:34Oh, I'm sorry.
04:35Don't be. You could help me save my very last red dignity.
04:39I mean, if I can't book a job playing a fake fiancé for a weekend, I should probably call it quits.
04:45Are you free to meet Hillary tomorrow, face to face?
04:48Sure thing.
04:49Hey. Okay. So, I Facebooked him. He hasn't responded. And when you Google him, the only thing that comes up are a few photos of him on Flickr with some chick named Lindsay on a beach.
05:01So, looks like he's not a psycho. He's just another out-of-work loser actor.
05:06You sound like my agent.
05:07Oh. Hi.
05:09Hi.
05:10Um, you two have fun.
05:12Great.
05:15Hi.
05:16So, I checked out?
05:20Yeah, seems like it.
05:22Do you think that Jason is more of a corporate lawyer type or-
05:26Corporate. What kind of car do you drive?
05:27Uh, 98, Jeep Grand Cherokee, fully loaded.
05:30We'll take my car.
05:31Okay.
05:32Okay, I'm gonna friend you on Facebook, accept my request, click on all my family photo albums, memorize all the names, everybody's clearly marked.
05:38Okay, will do.
05:39Okay.
05:41Well, I guess I'll pick you up here, tomorrow, 8am sharp.
05:45Sounds good.
05:48Okay.
05:52Um.
05:56Sorry, I don't know what's going on here with the thing, the hair.
06:00I'll take care of it.
06:01Yeah?
06:02Okay.
06:08I'm gonna buy your coffee.
06:15You clean up real good.
06:17You look nice yourself.
06:18And don't forget, my parents are very excited that you are a lawyer.
06:30About that.
06:31I don't know if I'm gonna be able to pull that off.
06:34You're an actor.
06:35Act.
06:41Okay, hit me with the family breakdown.
06:43Okay.
06:44Uh, Meredith.
06:45Mother.
06:46Housewife extraordinaire.
06:47Roy.
06:48Dad.
06:49Councilman.
06:50Your youngest sister is Trish.
06:51Joy.
06:52Right, right.
06:53Trish is the middle one.
06:54And, uh, her husband is Gil.
06:55And Joy's fiance's name is?
06:57Uh, John.
06:58Paul.
06:59Peter.
07:00You gotta get these straight.
07:01They're all gonna be at the party.
07:02Party?
07:03Yeah.
07:04It's no big deal.
07:05Just family.
07:06How long were you and Jason engaged?
07:07Uh, we dated for seven months.
07:08We were engaged for two.
07:10Wow.
07:11What happened?
07:12He's, uh, he's under a lot of pressure.
07:16Really stressed.
07:17He got this big job promotion offer in Pittsburgh.
07:19So.
07:20Oh, look.
07:21Here we are.
07:25Okay.
07:26Just remember, say as little as possible and follow my lead.
07:29Here we go.
07:32Here we go.
07:34Oh, honey, honey, honey.
07:35You're finally here.
07:37Oh, sweetie.
07:38Come here.
07:39You know, you could wash that car every once in a while.
07:46What about Jason's Tesla?
07:48I wanted to ride in that.
07:50Oh, that was my fault.
07:51I wanted to save my mileage, so we took the Jetta instead.
07:54Oh, well.
07:55At least we finally get to meet Jason.
08:01You're practically part of the family now.
08:03Yeah.
08:04Okay, well, let's go in.
08:05Okay.
08:06Everybody's looking forward to meeting you.
08:10Okay, come on in here.
08:13Oh, my God.
08:14I thought you said this was family only.
08:17I didn't want the whole town to think that you were going to be a spinster forever.
08:22Everyone, this is Hillary's Beyonce, Jason.
08:25Hi.
08:26Hi.
08:27How's it going?
08:28Oh, hey.
08:29Oh, yeah.
08:30Oh, Jason?
08:31Yeah.
08:32You were that firm that's defending that, uh, schmuck Shorman.
08:35Shorman?
08:36Yeah, man.
08:37He's as guilty as they come if you ask me.
08:39Pilking all those suckers out of their life savings.
08:41You know, Frank, I think everybody's considered innocent until proven guilty.
08:44I mean, isn't I right?
08:45Jason?
08:48Jason?
08:49Uh, Mr. Burns.
08:50Call me Roy.
08:51Yes.
08:52Pleasure to meet you, Roy.
08:53I do.
08:54You know what they say.
08:55How does it feel to be defending a crook like that?
08:57Well, uh, you know what?
08:58Frank, why don't you get yourself some eggnog?
09:00I just whipped up a fresh batch.
09:02Oh, that's a good time.
09:03Thanks, brother.
09:04Frank just comes for the eggnog.
09:05Yeah.
09:06So listen, uh, what kind of cases?
09:08Do you do, do you do, um, I don't know, fraud or extortion or money laundering?
09:12Uh, yeah.
09:13Yeah, I do.
09:14All of those.
09:15Come on, Dad.
09:16Leave poor Jason alone.
09:17He's spending enough time in the office already.
09:19Yeah, doing all that lawyering.
09:21Did you play?
09:22Uh, yes, but quite badly.
09:24Oh, that would be great.
09:26Mind if I don't?
09:27You know, when Hillary was young, she used to sing.
09:34Oh?
09:35Mm-hmm.
09:36That's...
09:37No.
09:38Oh, no, no, no, no, no.
09:39Okay, everybody, it's time to show the engagement ring.
09:50Wait till you see this beauty.
09:52Ta-da!
09:53Ta...
09:54I, I, I, I...
09:57I, I, I...
09:58I, I, I...
09:59I, I, I...
10:01I, I, I...
10:02What's the rest of the ring?
10:03I, I, I...
10:04What happened with the ring?
10:05That's a funny story, actually, right, sweetie?
10:08It turns out Hillary lost a few pounds, and the ring doesn't fit her anymore.
10:12Right.
10:13And this morning, she's taking a shower.
10:14She gets out of the shower, and the ring falls off her finger into the toilet.
10:18She calls me hysteric.
10:19Crazy.
10:20I was crazy.
10:21Crazy.
10:22She was, she was freaking out.
10:23I get there.
10:24So, what do I do?
10:25I've got to man up, right, Roy?
10:26Yeah.
10:27I've got to do it.
10:28I, I, I, it's go time.
10:29So I, I get down there on my knees, and I, I, I go in there.
10:31I go in there, I go in deep.
10:32I can feel it.
10:33I can feel it.
10:34I can feel it right there.
10:35It gets away, then I have to, I have to go a little bit deeper.
10:36And I'm reaching for it.
10:37And, ah, ah, ah.
10:38Nope.
10:39Deeper.
10:40Deeper.
10:41He has really small hands.
10:42It's disturbing, actually.
10:43And I, I, I can feel it.
10:44I can feel it.
10:45Right, right on the edge of my finger.
10:46It's right there.
10:47It's right there.
10:48And...
10:49I got it.
10:50Got the ring.
10:51Got the ring.
10:52Yeah, it's so cute.
10:53Oh, God.
10:54We decided to leave it home till we get it resized.
10:55Yeah.
10:56Yeah, it's better safe than sorry.
10:57Right, sweetie?
11:01I'm gonna get a drink.
11:05Hey.
11:06Hell, isn't it?
11:07I thought you quit.
11:09I did.
11:11So, is my fiancee boring yours with his foot talk yet?
11:15No.
11:16But I think David's got his hands pretty full.
11:20Did I say David?
11:22Yeah.
11:23Jason.
11:24Of course.
11:25David's a friend.
11:26I was on the phone.
11:28Well, I guess we better go back in there.
11:30If Mom has anything else to surprise me with, can you please tell me?
11:34Deal.
11:36Good to see you.
11:37Oh, my sweetie.
11:38Oh, look at this.
11:39Your picture's taken.
11:40Oh, the family photo.
11:41Yes, we always gather together here.
11:43Hey, everybody, ready?
11:48Don't worry, I could show Jason his room.
11:49Well, honey, don't be silly.
11:51The inn is full.
11:53Besides, I don't expect you to have separate rooms.
11:56Just separate beds.
12:00And if you need extra pillows or blankets, just ask me.
12:05That's okay, Mom.
12:06I think I know where everything is.
12:08Okay, well, you take it tonight.
12:09I'll take it tomorrow night.
12:10Whatever you want.
12:11Okay.
12:12I'm gonna go get a change for bed.
12:14Okay.
12:24Sorry.
12:25Um...
12:27No, I'm sorry.
12:28I thought you were still in the...
12:29Pajamas, please?
12:30Uh...
12:31No, I don't, uh...
12:32I don't wear...
12:34Pajamas.
12:35I didn't bring it.
12:36Okay, that's fine.
12:37I'll just find...
12:38See if my dad has him.
12:39Great.
12:46Daddy?
12:48Daddy.
12:49I plead not guilty.
12:50Sorry?
12:51What?
12:52Sorry?
12:53I came to ask you if Jason could borrow some pajamas.
12:55Oh, I don't have any.
12:57Your mother and I sleep in the room.
12:59Ugh.
13:00Since when?
13:01Ugh.
13:02Since Joy went off to college.
13:03We ran around naked for a week.
13:05You should have seen your mother.
13:06Oh, no, no, no.
13:07I don't agree.
13:08This guy, uh, this Jason, he treats you right, does he?
13:12Yeah.
13:13Yeah, of course.
13:14What?
13:15You love him?
13:17What?
13:18It's an easy question.
13:19Should be an easy answer.
13:20Dad, I'm marrying the guy.
13:22So?
13:23Do you love him?
13:25Yes, I do.
13:30Hey.
13:31The Beatles are right, after all.
13:34All you need is love.
13:36I just wanted to let you know that I may have lumped into some tickets to me.
13:39I just wanted to let you know that I may have lumped into some tickets to me.
13:41I have no comment.
13:42And, um, I don't know, I thought maybe you might have a little comment.
13:43I know.
13:44I know.
13:45I know.
13:46I don't know.
13:47I know.
13:48I know.
13:49I know.
13:50I know.
13:51I know.
13:52I know.
13:53I know.
13:54I know.
13:55I know.
13:56I know.
13:57I know.
13:58But you don't know that you like me?
14:00But um.
14:01I just wanted to let you know that I may have lumped into some tickets to Brad Перde get
14:06up and I don't know, I thought maybe you might want to go?
14:11No.
14:12Am I here?
14:15Um, call me.
14:31Morning.
14:32Morning, sweetheart.
14:33Where's Trish and Gil?
14:35Trish has sold the hotel. Gil hasn't shown up yet.
14:38Why are they staying at a hotel when there's plenty of room here?
14:40Well, with Emma and the nanny, maybe they felt they'd be a bother.
14:45I don't even know why Trish has a nanny.
14:47I mean, come on.
14:48It felt like she's ever had a job.
14:50But it's nice that her husband can afford to give her whatever she wants.
14:54He's just never around.
14:56How about Jason?
14:57How much does he earn?
14:59Mom.
15:00Oh, sweetie, I just want to make sure that you're cared for.
15:04Oh, come on, Mom. It is the 21st century.
15:06You don't need to be cared for.
15:08You have our own jobs. Right, Gil?
15:12Actually, the newspaper I was working for shut down.
15:14Oh, honey, not again.
15:16Well, it's not my fault. Nobody reads newspapers anymore.
15:19Everything's on the internet.
15:21Well, just in time.
15:23I want you to tell me if my yam casserole is sweet enough.
15:28Oh, I'm sorry. I'm not a fan.
15:31Yes, you are. You're such a joker.
15:33He's such a joker. He loves yams. Like I said, he loves yams.
15:36Yeah, I love it.
15:37Okay.
15:38Okay.
15:43Mmm.
15:43Mmm.
15:44I made that with Splenda instead of sugar.
15:46Mmm.
15:48Oh, yeah.
15:50Maybe just a little more time.
15:52He is really funny.
15:54He is. He really is.
15:56He's so funny. He's such a kidder.
15:58Well, I just hope he's more serious when it comes to setting a wedding date.
16:03Please don't start.
16:04Honey, I'm sorry if I seem a little anxious.
16:09It's just that I have been deprived of planning the weddings for not one, but two of my daughters.
16:18Here we go.
16:18Can't you girls understand that a mother wants to plan her daughter's weddings?
16:25Oh, since you were babies, I've dreamed of this.
16:28And then to find out that Tricia eloped to an island.
16:32Well, what about Joy? Joy's engaged.
16:34Yes.
16:35Joy's engaged.
16:36Yes, she is.
16:37And has been for two years.
16:39I will be six feet under by the time she sets a date.
16:45I'm sorry if I'm a little...
16:48Upset.
16:50But, but honey, it's come down to you.
16:54You're the only one I can count on.
16:56I'm, I'm, uh...
16:57December 21st.
16:59I'm, I'm, uh...
17:00December 21st.
17:02I didn't want to tell you.
17:03I wanted to...
17:04We were going to surprise you at dinner, but that's it.
17:07December 21st.
17:08You're getting married on December 21st?
17:11Yes.
17:12Oh, my God.
17:13That's kind of soon, but it's fabulous.
17:16Oh, my darling.
17:17You're all...
17:17Oh, this is fantastic.
17:20Oh, did you hear?
17:22I'm so happy.
17:24Well, okay, I have to book see the community hall
17:27and, and call Gayle's Greenery.
17:29I don't even know the number.
17:30We wanted something small.
17:31What are they doing out there?
17:43Well, your father got it in his head
17:45that he was going to deep fry the turkey this year.
17:48Once we get this baby boiling,
17:51you just rig the bird up to this line,
17:53just drop it in the oil, huh?
17:54Whatever you say.
17:55All right, let's fire this bad boy up.
17:57All right?
17:57Get that, would you?
17:58Yeah.
17:59Let me ask you something.
18:00Uh-huh.
18:00Do you ever represent a councilman or a politician or anything?
18:03No, not personally.
18:05But you could, huh?
18:06Sure.
18:07Good to know.
18:08Good to know.
18:10Uh, wait.
18:12Don't you want to wait until the oil heat's up?
18:14Come on, we're missing the gate.
18:16Besides, it's going to take half an hour for it to get boiling.
18:18Come on.
18:18Oh, God.
18:20Okay.
18:21So, it's me.
18:23No, things are not going well at all.
18:24I just told my mom that David and I are getting married in a month.
18:26You're marrying David now?
18:28That was quick.
18:29No, no, no.
18:29Me and Jason.
18:30I just, I blurted it out that we're getting married on December 21st.
18:33Wait, what?
18:34This is nuts.
18:35I'm putting you on speaker.
18:36Well, no, because what if Jason really did get cold feet
18:39and he's going to come back to me
18:40because I mean more than Pittsburgh.
18:42And then the wedding's already planned,
18:44which is actually not that crazy.
18:47No, it's crazy, Hill.
18:48It's super crazy.
18:49I know, it's crazy.
18:51What am I going to do?
18:52Look, I don't know.
18:53Surf's up.
18:54Greg's going to be here any minute.
18:55I got to go.
18:56What?
18:57Yeah, just listen to your heart.
18:59Just ride the wave.
19:01Just ride the wave.
19:03What?
19:03Surf's up.
19:04I don't want to go.
19:05Sophie.
19:06Sophie.
19:09You know, Roy,
19:10I think it's probably been 30 minutes.
19:12Should we go check on the pot?
19:14Well, do you know,
19:15I could use a little, you know,
19:17legal counsel.
19:20Oh, well, you're a councilman, right?
19:23I'm sure you have a great lawyer.
19:25He's a little too involved.
19:28You know what I mean?
19:29Anyway,
19:30what would be better than keeping it in a family?
19:33Hmm.
19:34All right, well, I guess I better go.
19:35Drop that bird in the oil.
19:37Oh, are you sure you don't need a hand with that?
19:38No, no, I got it, Kirk.
19:42Uh, ticklish.
19:46Hi.
19:48It's beeping.
19:52Peter, can I have my foot back now?
19:55Oh, of course.
19:57You're welcome.
19:58Anything important?
20:14Oh, no.
20:16No, nothing important.
20:24Oh, oh!
20:28Oh, oh!
20:39Oh, oh!
20:44Roy!
20:46Oh, for the love of...
20:50Well, this isn't so bad, is it?
20:53Oh, um, I asked for a seltzer.
21:00This looks like tap water with cheese floating in it.
21:04Sorry, Mrs. Burns.
21:07I can see that your old boyfriend hasn't amounted to much.
21:11Hi!
21:12Hi!
21:13Sorry we're late.
21:14Hey.
21:14Hi.
21:15Where's Gil?
21:16Oh, uh, the benefit that he was attending ran late, so now he's snowed in, in New York.
21:23Well, that's too bad.
21:24I know.
21:25If he were here, he could have gotten us a table at the golf club.
21:28Then we wouldn't have to eat in this dump.
21:30Hey, it's not snowing in New York.
21:32Hmm.
21:33You know, Gilbert has a platinum membership to all the best clubs.
21:36Well, I'm not a big golf fan, so this place suits me just fine.
21:40This is fine.
21:45This is great.
21:46I...
21:46No?
21:49I thought you said that you met Jason at a charity golf tournament.
21:54That you were covering for that paper?
21:56That's right.
21:57Yeah.
21:58But I'm not a fan of the golf.
22:01But, you know, like a spectator.
22:04But I just play.
22:04But very, very badly.
22:06Very, very badly.
22:07That's why they gave you a car.
22:09Tesla, right?
22:11Yes.
22:12He won the car at the tournament, and you interviewed the winner.
22:15Look at me.
22:16He forgets everything, right, honey?
22:18Crazy.
22:19I think you're sandbagging, aren't you?
22:21No.
22:21I know a galfa.
22:22Sand.
22:22Hola.
22:23Oh, thank you.
22:24My name is Paco, and I'll be your server this holiday evening.
22:27Would you like to hear about our specials?
22:29Ah, seguro.
22:32Okay, well, basically what we have is anything that's chicken, pollo,
22:35we switch that out for guajolote.
22:37Guajolote?
22:42Guajolote.
22:43That means turkey.
22:44And that turkey tacos are particularly delicious tonight.
22:47David?
22:49Yes?
22:49Hey, it's Julian.
22:53Hi, Julian.
22:54Hey.
22:55Hi there.
22:56Hi there.
22:57But my name is Jason.
22:59Jason?
23:00Jason is my name.
23:01No, it's not.
23:02Really?
23:03Yeah, it's Jason.
23:04But my...
23:05David is my middle name, so there's confusion sometimes.
23:09Okay.
23:10Alrighty.
23:11Well, it's been a while since we did that bus and truck tour pair together.
23:14Oh, God, you look good.
23:17Are you still in the biz?
23:18Yes.
23:20So what are you doing?
23:21Oh, you're looking at it.
23:22It's a nightmare, yeah.
23:23But I had to move back in with my parents to get a more stable career going on.
23:26So here I am.
23:27All right, I hear you.
23:29Gracias.
23:30De nada.
23:30I'll be there.
23:31It never stops.
23:33Anyway, I'll be back in a minute to get your orders.
23:35Just word to the wise, don't get the Flavos Rancheros.
23:38I had them for breakfast.
23:38I feel like there's a knife in my colon.
23:40Happy turkey day, everyone.
23:41Olé!
23:42Hey!
23:42Hey!
23:47Jillian.
23:49So, Jason David, what biz are you still in?
23:54Oh, I'm in the law.
23:57I...
23:57I do a little pro bono work.
24:02I'm charity, and I represented a few theater companies a few years back.
24:08So, theater people are so...
24:11I'm crazy.
24:13I need some salsa.
24:15Mm-hmm.
24:16He's a giver.
24:17Mm.
24:17Mm.
24:17Mm.
24:18How could you forget we went over that at least half of those times?
24:23I've never played golf before.
24:25It's not a part of my repertoire.
24:26And what was all that with the crazy waiter in the diner?
24:28We were in a production of hair eight years ago.
24:30How was I supposed to know we'd end up in...
24:32Where are we, anyway?
24:33Ah, is everything okay?
24:35Yeah.
24:35As we were just talking about the mix-up of the diner.
24:39Oh, what mix-up?
24:40Well, I'm pooped.
24:42Oh, I'm pooped, too.
24:44It's not every day that we blow up a turkey around here.
24:47You know, dinner was actually kind of fun, and the Mexican food wasn't half bad.
24:51Oh, isn't that good?
24:52Not as good as your turkey dinner would have been.
24:54It wasn't even close.
24:56You know, if Hillary doesn't take me to the curb, maybe I'll be lucky enough to try it next year.
25:01Well, you know, I didn't want to deep-fry that turkey in the first place.
25:06But when Roy gets an idea stuck in his head, we've got stuffing, three pies, and my yam casserole,
25:16which is always better on the second day, anyway.
25:17That is so true.
25:19You know, it's getting late.
25:21So you go to bed, get a good night's sleep, and we'll see you in the morning, okay?
25:26Yeah, good night.
25:29Your turn to sleep on the cot.
25:30What?
25:32I'm sorry.
25:36No.
25:37No, it was me.
25:40I dropped the ball.
25:42I just, I don't know why you're doing this.
25:44I mean, I know you want the tickets, but there's got to be an easier way to get to Mexico.
25:50Blyar del Carmen.
25:54It's where I met my girlfriend.
25:56Or, rather, my ex-girlfriend.
25:57I guess I thought that if I took her back to the resort where we met, and, I don't know, it might read Night the Spark or something.
26:08But I didn't have enough money for the ticket, so?
26:11Well, I'm sure it'll work.
26:13I hope so.
26:14I mean, she's kind of dating this other guy right now.
26:20But who does she call every time they break up?
26:25Me.
26:26Me.
26:27So, obviously, she, deep down, she really doesn't want to be with him.
26:33So, you're the get-back guy.
26:37What?
26:38What, Matt?
26:41The get-back guy?
26:43You know, the guy she calls to get back at her ex.
26:46No, I'm not that guy.
26:47He's that guy.
26:48Well, when you met her, was she seeing him?
26:49No, they just broken up.
26:51See?
26:53No, no, no.
26:54It's not like that.
26:55No, they broke up.
26:56Uh-huh.
26:57And then we met.
26:58And then we were, you know, together.
27:01Like a couple.
27:02For how long?
27:04For, you know, five weeks.
27:09And then she went back to him?
27:11Yeah, but she keeps calling me.
27:14All right, it may look like I'm the get-back guy,
27:17but I know that all she needs to do is get away from that hold he has on her,
27:24and then she can realize that what she really wants is me.
27:29Okay.
27:31Trust me.
27:32I know.
27:33She's materialistic and sentimental.
27:36So, this could work.
27:38Maybe.
27:39I mean, the ticket thing.
27:44Are you hungry?
27:47You know, I was bummed when the post closed down.
27:50That was my Sunday morning read.
27:51I love that funky rag.
27:52I know.
27:54The end of an era.
27:55So, are you going to find another gay reporting or something?
27:58I don't know.
27:59I mean, the only reason why I got that job was because my friend Sophie worked there,
28:02and I needed it, and I thought I'm very good at it.
28:05You wrote that article a few weeks back about the animal shelter, right?
28:10Yeah, that was me.
28:11Well, you must have some talent.
28:12I mean, it's thanks to you that I am now the proud owner of the same dog you were hugging in that photo.
28:18You rescued Skittles from the animal shelter because of what I wrote?
28:21Yeah, only his name's Whiskey now.
28:25Yeah, I'm going to miss the post.
28:26I mean, I get all the news I can handle online, but I'm going to hold something, you know?
28:34Not just my laptop, but an actual newspaper.
28:37Yeah, I love print.
28:38Who says print is dead?
28:39Let's start a revolution.
28:40Even a print.
28:41Ah, nice.
28:45What about you?
28:46This and that cell phone gig are the only paying jobs I've had in a while.
28:50Hmm.
28:53Uh, look at the pair of us.
28:54Dumped, unemployed, and eating sugar and carbs at midnight.
28:57Right.
28:58Oh.
29:02Who is it?
29:03I don't know.
29:08We should take this upstairs.
29:10Great idea.
29:11Only two more days to go.
29:13If we lie low, we just go with it, I think we're going to get through this.
29:18Now, let's not pressure it up.
29:20Let's get out of here and go sightseeing or something.
29:22I'm planning it.
29:23Wow.
29:29No.
29:30Oh, sorry.
29:31Oh, you startled me.
29:33It's beautiful.
29:35Oh, well, it will be.
29:37You do this all yourself?
29:38Every year.
29:39Um, can I help you at all?
29:41No.
29:42Oh.
29:44I'm sorry.
29:47Uh, okay.
29:48There is a wreath over there that I had designed for the mantle, yes?
29:54Here?
29:54Pick it up very carefully, and it belongs right on the mantle in the center, okay?
30:00Watch yourself on that ladder.
30:01Oh, I got it.
30:05Thank you, Jason.
30:06Don't worry about it.
30:08It's a little crooked there.
30:11No, I mean, thank you for Thanksgiving and for being such a good sport today.
30:18And thank you for loving my daughter.
30:26She loves you very much, you know.
30:31I can see it in her face.
30:35Well, uh, I love her, too, Mrs. Burns.
30:41Oh, call me Meredith.
30:43Please.
30:44Or, or Mom, if you like.
30:47Listen, uh, can I give you a hand with anything else, or?
30:55After 20-some years, I've got it down to a science.
30:59All right.
31:01I'll, um, head up to bed, then.
31:06Good night, Jason.
31:07Good night.
31:16Good night, Mom.
31:29Hey, Hillary.
31:30Yeah.
31:31You see this?
31:32Oh, yeah.
31:33My mom does this every year after Thanksgiving.
31:35It's her tradition.
31:36When we were little, we used to think it was elves or something.
31:45Just the two I was looking for.
31:47Hey.
31:47I know you're only here for a few more days, but we have to find the perfect wedding dress
31:58and pick the china and the linens and the cake.
32:03Oh, I think you should go, hon.
32:05I mean, go with it.
32:07Isn't that what brides are supposed to do?
32:09Go dress shopping with their mothers?
32:11Yes, of course.
32:12Yeah.
32:12But, uh, do you really think it's a good idea to go shopping on Black Friday?
32:16Let's go shopping!
32:17Oh!
32:18Let's go shopping!
32:19Yay!
32:20Yay!
32:21Yay!
32:22Yay!
32:22Yay!
32:22Yay!
32:23Yay!
32:23Yay!
32:23Yay!
32:24Yay!
32:24Yay!
32:25Yay!
32:25Yay!
32:26Yay!
32:27Yay!
32:31Mom, look.
32:33Oh!
32:33It's beautiful!
32:35Ah, dum-da-dum!
32:37Here.
32:38Hold my purse.
32:39Thanks.
32:40Here.
32:41Here.
32:42Okay.
32:43Thanks.
32:46Are you almost ready?
32:50Oh!
32:51Oh!
32:52Oh!
32:53Hilary, it looks beautiful!
32:56Yeah?
32:56Oh, hon, you look beautiful!
32:57Beautiful.
32:58Pretty.
32:59Thank you very much.
33:02Oh, darling, I love you.
33:04Yeah?
33:04Yeah.
33:09So what's going on with you and Jason?
33:12Nothing.
33:13My point exactly.
33:15We're two young lovebirds.
33:17I don't see much affection.
33:21No kiss, no hug.
33:22Mom, he's just not a touchy-feely guy.
33:24Don't worry about it.
33:25Well, I just want to be able to see your marriage succeed, you know.
33:30Most marriages fall apart first in the bedroom.
33:35You know, your father and I make love three times a week.
33:38Ah, my ears are bleeding.
33:40Jason's a good catch.
33:42A little odd and nervous, I guess, but I like him.
33:47He's good for you.
33:48Pretty.
33:55Oh!
33:57Pretty.
33:58Oh!
33:59Is she getting married?
34:00Well, yes, of course.
34:01I'm not.
34:02Oh.
34:03My therapist says that I should visualize what I want and it will manifest itself.
34:07Well, that sounds like a very good strategy.
34:12I want that dress.
34:13I'll take it.
34:16That's beautiful.
34:18Nice.
34:19Oh!
34:19Oh!
34:19Oh, ma'am.
34:20Ma'am, that is my fiancé's dress.
34:22I saw it first and it's mine.
34:24Okay, can I have you, please?
34:25No.
34:25Look, of your wing!
34:26Pretty!
34:27Oh, my God.
34:31Who dressed my bride?
34:32Just between you and I, how would you advise our client to proceed if it was discovered
34:42that, let's say, he was getting money for selling, I don't know, votes?
34:47I would probably advise that person to stop talking about it and definitely not Tony.
34:51I'm not kidding.
34:52Hey, there's no one.
34:53Gotcha.
34:54Gotcha.
34:56Hey, so what do you like better, cups or mugs?
34:58I don't know.
34:59I think we get better use out of mugs.
35:01What do you think?
35:02Table setting for eight or twelve?
35:04Hillary, can I talk you outside for a minute?
35:06Yeah.
35:10What, what, what?
35:11You do realize that we're not actually getting married, right?
35:16Yeah, yeah, yeah.
35:18Yeah.
35:19But what if Jason actually did get cold feet?
35:22I mean, a lot of people think they want to move to Pittsburgh and then they change their
35:25mind.
35:26Hey, look sharp, kid.
35:28There is someone here to see you.
35:31Oh, Father Macy, what are you doing here?
35:38Well, sweetie, your wedding is in less than a month.
35:40You really should have met with Father Macy weeks ago, so I invited him over.
35:45Oh, hi.
35:46Oh.
35:46Hello, I'm Father Macy.
35:49Hi, Father.
35:51Jason.
35:52So, is there somewhere we could go and talk?
35:55Well, it's a beautiful day.
35:56Why don't you take a walk?
35:57Perfect.
35:59So, Jason, you're going to marry Hillary.
36:02That's what they keep telling me.
36:03I would like to make sure that you're both headed on the same path.
36:07That you share the same ideals and beliefs, for if not, the marriage could suffer.
36:10So, Jason, tell me, which church were you raised in?
36:16Well, I didn't actually go to church.
36:20No worries.
36:20Are you Roman Catholic?
36:22No.
36:23Protestant?
36:24Mm-hmm.
36:24LDS?
36:25Jewish.
36:27Jewish.
36:29Well, I see.
36:32I'm sure you understand, then, that I would not be able to perform the ceremony.
36:35No, we talked about this, and Jason has no problem converting.
36:39Actually, I...
36:40Oh, I have a wonderful idea.
36:43We could have Jason baptized at the same time as Emma.
36:46Oh, I don't...
36:47No, Trish, I don't...
36:48Yeah, that could...
36:50Wow.
36:51Oh, no way.
36:52No way I'm getting baptized.
36:53Come on.
36:54It's just a formality.
36:55It's not that big a deal.
36:56I'm Jewish?
36:57You're not that Jewish.
36:59What are you even talking about?
37:00My grandma, Turtletop, would roll in her grave if she knew I was doing this.
37:04My mom will be so disappointed if we don't have a wedding at her church.
37:07What wedding, Hillary?
37:09We're not really getting married!
37:10Stay quiet!
37:11Shh!
37:11Shh!
37:14Oh, my God.
37:15I'm so sorry.
37:18This is so stupid.
37:20You're right.
37:21This is so stupid.
37:22What am I doing?
37:22This is so stupid.
37:24I mean, here I am, trying to do everything to make my mother happy.
37:28And for what?
37:29To set her up for my greatest disappointment ever.
37:32That's so foolish to think Jason is actually coming back.
37:35He's not coming back.
37:36I mean, he's in Pittsburgh.
37:38He's happy to be rid of me.
37:46Here.
37:49Just give the voucher numbers to the airline for your tickets.
37:55Take them.
37:57You earn them.
37:57But the weekend's not even over yet.
38:02Please.
38:03I couldn't expect you to stay when the crap hits the fan.
38:06I mean, God knows you've been thrown over, right?
38:10Yeah.
38:10So, uh, this is it.
38:15Engagement's off?
38:16Yes.
38:17Yeah.
38:18The engagement's off.
38:24Um.
38:26Is there a train or something I should catch?
38:30Yeah.
38:32Um, you missed the 5.30, but I think there's an 11.30.
38:34One, that's, that's better.
38:38I should probably wait to leave until after everyone's gone to bed, so.
38:42Thanks.
38:43Sure.
38:56Well, that was, uh, fun.
38:59Right?
39:00Yeah.
39:01Good luck with, uh, everything.
39:04Hope you find the spark in Mexico.
39:08Thanks.
39:09Um.
39:09Bye.
39:09Bye.
39:23Bye.
39:27I love you.
39:27I love you.
39:29Bye.
39:30Bye.
39:30Bye.
39:31Bye.
39:31Bye.
39:33Bye.
39:35Bye.
39:37Hey, sis.
39:39Call you tomorrow.
39:43Good.
39:43Is that the waiter from the diner?
39:45Yeah.
39:46Stu and I dated for a couple months before Mom set me up with the footman.
39:50She thought Stu wasn't good enough, so...
39:53She worked her magic, and the next thing I knew, Stu was out of the picture,
39:58and I was engaged to Pete the podiatrist.
40:01Is that why you haven't set a date?
40:04Don't get me wrong.
40:05Um, Pete's a good man.
40:08A little weird, but good guy.
40:12I just don't love him.
40:16Not like I love Stu.
40:18What's really going on, you and Jason?
40:22Jason dumped me a week ago.
40:25So I hired an actor named David to play my fiancé for the weekend.
40:32You what?
40:33Wait, wait.
40:38Okay, so where did Jason or David go?
40:43Left.
40:45Just...
40:46I don't know, it's left, it's...
40:50I don't know.
40:52Oh, wow.
40:54But you like him.
40:57David, you like David.
40:58I...
40:58What?
40:59I don't like David.
41:00I don't even know David.
41:01It's crazy.
41:02I like David.
41:03Yes.
41:05There's something I have to tell you.
41:07About Jason.
41:10He dumped me.
41:11I am well aware of what's going on.
41:14You are?
41:14Yes, I saw him leaving last night.
41:17Oh, that's just part of it.
41:19That's not...
41:20Hillary Jean.
41:21I have to say this.
41:22Sweetheart.
41:23When are you going to get serious?
41:26You are not a spring chicken anymore.
41:2830 is in the rearview mirror.
41:31And you have nothing to show for it.
41:33No career, no direction, and now I guess no Jason.
41:37Guess again.
41:38I'm sitting in his car.
41:40I thought I'd invite him in.
41:40Long story to tell you what I have.
41:43It's not.
41:44There's no one.
41:46Just so everyone knows, for the record, none of this is Hillary's fault.
41:50Oh, no.
41:51Okay.
41:52So, aren't you two going to kiss and make up?
41:55No.
41:56Go on.
41:57Come on.
41:59Okay.
42:10Should I call Father Macy?
42:21I don't know.
42:22I don't know.
42:23No.
42:23No, that's fine.
42:24Call him.
42:26Call him.
42:28I gotta...
42:29I should go and pack.
42:34Told you.
42:45Hey, we had a deal, right?
42:49So, is your...
42:50Is your ex or whatever, is she going to Mexico?
42:54Yep.
42:54Well, that's nice.
42:55You guys should have a good time.
42:57I don't know about me,
42:59but I'm sure she and Peggy will have a great time.
43:01What do you mean?
43:04She thought I was giving her the tickets.
43:06Oh, I was...
43:08She was just using me.
43:09It's the story of my life.
43:11Always the get-back guy, never just the guy.
43:14You know, don't give her those tickets.
43:19Hi, Liz.
43:20So, do the tickets?
43:23Yeah, about that.
43:24Um, you know, when I told you about these tickets,
43:26I was kind of hoping that you and I would go and have a really nice...
43:29Wait till Matt finds out that I'm going to Mexico.
43:33Right.
43:33Can we not talk about Matt, maybe?
43:35Oh, my God.
43:36He's going to be so pissed.
43:38It's me.
43:39Hi.
43:39Hi.
43:41Oh, I'm so sorry I'm late.
43:43I had to meet the caterers.
43:44I had to have her dress fitting.
43:47I'm sorry.
43:48And you are...
43:49You are...
43:51Lindsay.
43:53Lindsay.
43:53Lindsay?
43:56Lindsay, David told me all about you and Playa del Carmen.
43:59God, I guess I'm lucky he's not into party girls, huh?
44:03Did you send her an invite to our wedding?
44:05Wedding?
44:06You didn't send her an invite?
44:08It happened so fast, though.
44:10That's right.
44:11It was just boom.
44:12Like that.
44:13Love at first sight.
44:14Isn't that right, sir?
44:15Mm-hmm.
44:16I'm so sorry.
44:18David, can I just have the tickets, please?
44:19It's...
44:19Oops.
44:21David.
44:22It's actually why I'm here.
44:24I have to admit, when he first told me about your thing in Mexico, I was jealous.
44:28I was.
44:29In the heat of the moment, I told him to give the vouchers away, right?
44:32Because it's not like we're going to have a honeymoon where he met some girl.
44:35But then, I woke up this morning, and I was like, no.
44:40You know what?
44:40The past is the past.
44:41The heck with it.
44:42I mean, he's marrying me, not you.
44:44So I went online, I traded in the vouchers, and surprise!
44:48Honeymoon in Playa del Carmen!
44:49You didn't!
44:49I did!
44:50Oh, come here.
44:54Bye, Lindsay.
44:55Help!
45:19Angels we have heard on high
45:23Sweetly singing of the plains
45:29Gloria
45:40In excelsis Deo
45:48Oh, that was wonderful.
46:02Honey, I haven't heard you sing for so long.
46:05And the two of you together.
46:07Just beautiful.
46:08Just beautiful.
46:17Jason...
46:18What are you doing here?
46:23I wanted to see you.
46:24Who is it, honey?
46:28Oh...
46:29Mom?
46:31Dad?
46:33Everybody?
46:36This is Jason.
46:38Happy holidays, everybody.
46:40Mom, Mom, I'm sorry.
46:48I shouldn't have done that, but I didn't want to disappoint you.
46:50So you bring a total stranger into my house.
46:52I would never, ever have believed that you would be capable of doing something so despicable.
46:58What were you thinking?
47:00Peter and I are breaking up.
47:01Sorry, dude.
47:05Sorry, dude.
47:06I'm sorry, dude.
47:06No.
47:07I'm sorry, dude.
47:08I'm sorry.
47:08I'm sorry.
47:09Is there any chance you might still be a lawyer with it?
47:20No.
47:22Hillary, can we talk?
47:24I'm so sorry about David.
47:28I don't know.
47:28I think I might have lost my mind.
47:30I'm so confused.
47:31I don't know anything.
47:32I don't understand.
47:34You do?
47:35Because I don't...
47:37People do crazy things when their hearts have been broken.
47:40Besides, harboring grudges is no way for us to start a future together.
47:44A future?
47:46You said I was a mistake.
47:49And I don't know if I want to move to Pittsburgh.
47:51There is no Pittsburgh.
47:54Sharpell gave the promotion to his idiot nephew.
47:57But none of that matters anymore because now we can be together.
48:07David, what are you doing?
48:17Well, actually, I was just going to go talk to Hillary.
48:19I think that's a bad idea.
48:20In fact, I'm very surprised to see that you're still here.
48:24Weren't you the one that was paid to fill Jason's shoes?
48:27And now that Jason is here, I really don't think there's any reason for you to stay.
48:33Well, I...
48:33Don't.
48:34Don't hurt Hillary's chances.
48:36Okay.
48:38No, no, no.
48:39You know what?
48:40You may think that Jason is the perfect son-in-law, but he's not.
48:44He walked out on Hillary.
48:47She's the one who's perfect.
48:48She's kind and she's beautiful.
48:50And she's a gifted writer.
48:52Have you ever even read one of her articles?
48:55She concocted this whole thing just because she's terrified of disappointing you.
49:01All she wants is to keep you happy.
49:07And Meredith, I'm sorry that I deceived you.
49:12I truly am very sorry.
49:15And it's fine if you think that Jason will make her happy.
49:18But have you ever asked Hillary what will make her happy?
49:21Have you?
49:24Kiss me.
49:42What?
49:43Kiss me.
49:44I really have to get this done.
49:45Kiss me like the future Mrs. King.
49:47Kiss me like you love me.
49:48Hillary, I really don't think your parents asked the place for this.
49:51You two love me, right?
49:52Go for King.
49:58Bill, it's going to be fine.
49:59No.
50:00Gary will get him to me.
50:06I have a question.
50:08Does, um, Jason, the real Jason, not the fake Jason,
50:14does he have any other talents besides being a good lawyer?
50:18What do you mean?
50:20Can you rig a turkey?
50:21Maybe play a tune?
50:23Jason?
50:25I don't think so.
50:28What do you make you?
50:29Sing?
50:30Like you did earlier tonight?
50:35You know, I know it doesn't seem like it.
50:38But your mother really just wants you to be happy.
50:41Maybe it's time you told her what you want.
50:45If you know what you want.
50:47Mom.
50:49Oh, Hillary.
50:51I'm so sorry, honey.
50:55You sent all these beautiful articles, and I'm sorry I didn't read them.
51:01You've always been a gifted writer.
51:03And all of those wonderful things that David yelled at me.
51:08Do you love Jason?
51:11Not, not, not, I mean, you know, the real Jason.
51:14Oh, I know what you mean.
51:20No.
51:24You think I hate him?
51:27Me too.
51:31Do you love David?
51:32David?
51:32I gotta buy you a car.
51:58Thanks.
51:59I have four copies, right?
52:05What?
52:06You say my car?
52:08Hillary, what?
52:09Are you...
52:10Where are you going?
52:11I'll call you a cab.
52:31Hi.
52:39How did you...
52:41I borrowed Jason's car.
52:42You and Jason?
52:47Nope.
52:48Jason is a total jerk, you're right.
52:50And a big mistake.
52:52Huge mistake.
52:55Huge mistake.
52:57Okay.
52:59You're here now.
53:02You're here.
53:03Mm-hmm.
53:03What does that make me?
53:09Not a mistake.
53:10Not a mistake.
53:10Not a mistake.
53:33You're here.
53:40Nagos House House House House House House House House House House House House House House House House House House House House House House House House House House House House House House House House House House House House House House House House House House House House House House House House House House House House House House House House House House House House House House House House House House House House House House House House House House House House House House House House House House House House House House House House House House House House House House House House House House House House House House House House House House House House House House House House House House House House House House House House House House House House House House House House House House House House House House House House House House House House House House House House House House House House Speaker House House House House House House House House House House House House House House House House House House House House House House House House House House
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