- 2 days ago
Category
🎥
Short filmTranscript
00:00Yeah, sound like fine. You may be a wolf.
00:03You may be the scariest bandit in Hajin province,
00:06but you're a lousy tipper.
00:08Really?
00:09So, how'd you get out of there alive?
00:12I mean, I didn't actually say that,
00:15but I thought it in my mind.
00:18If he could read my mind, he'd have been like,
00:21What?
00:22Order up!
00:23Hope you like it.
00:25This is really good!
00:28Good!
00:29No, come on. You should try my dad's secret ingredient soup.
00:31He actually knows the secret ingredient.
00:34What are you talking about? This is amazing.
00:36Wow, you're a really good cook.
00:38I wish my mouth was bigger.
00:39Tigress, you've got to try this.
00:41It is said that the dragon warrior can survive for months at a time
00:45on nothing but the dew of a single ginkgo leaf
00:48and the energy of the universe.
00:51I guess my body doesn't know it's the dragon warrior yet.
00:55I'm gonna need a lot more than dew
00:57and, uh, universe juice.
01:04What?
01:05Oh, nothing, Master Shifu.
01:10You'll never be the dragon warrior
01:12unless you lose 500 pounds and brush your teeth.
01:15What is that noise you're making?
01:17After? I never heard of it.
01:19Work hard, Linda.
01:20Maybe someday you will have ears like mine.
01:25That's good.
01:26Uh-oh, uh-oh.
01:27Ears.
01:28It's not working for you?
01:30I thought they were pretty good.
01:31It's Shifu.
01:32Of course it's Shifu.
01:33What do you think I'm doing?
01:34Ooh.
01:35Master Shifu.
01:36Uh...
01:37You think this is funny?
01:40Heilung has escaped from prison
01:41and you're acting like children.
01:42What?
01:43He is coming for the Dragon Scroll
01:44and you are the only one who can stop him.
01:46And here I am saying you got no sense of humor.
01:48I'm gonna...
01:49Stop down.
01:50What?
01:51You're serious?
01:52And I have to...
01:53Uh...
01:54No...
01:55Master Hugway will stop him.
01:56He did it before.
01:57I don't know.
01:58I don't know.
01:59I don't know.
02:00I don't know.
02:01I don't know.
02:02I don't know.
02:03Uh...
02:04No...
02:05Master Hugway will stop him.
02:06He did it before.
02:07He'll do it again.
02:08Hugway cannot.
02:09Not anymore.
02:11Huh?
02:12Our only hope...
02:14is the Dragon Warrior.
02:15The Panda?
02:16Yes, the Panda!
02:17Master, please.
02:18Let us stop, Tai Lung.
02:19This is what you've trained us for.
02:21No!
02:22It is not your destiny to defeat Tai Lung.
02:24It is his!
02:26Where'd he go?
02:27You cannot leave.
02:36A real warrior never quits.
02:38Watch me!
02:42Come on.
02:43How am I supposed to beat Tai Lung?
02:45I can't even beat you to the stairs.
02:47You will beat him because you are the Dragon Warrior.
02:50Ow!
02:51You don't believe that.
02:52Oh!
02:53You never believed that.
02:54From the first moment I got here,
02:56you've been trying to get rid of me.
02:58Yes!
02:59I was!
03:00But now I ask you to trust in your master,
03:02as I have come to trust in mine.
03:05You're not my master.
03:08And I'm not the Dragon Warrior.
03:10Then why didn't you quit?
03:11You knew I was trying to get rid of you,
03:13yet you stayed.
03:14Yeah, I stayed.
03:16I stayed because every time you threw a brick at my head,
03:20or said I smelled, it hurt.
03:23But it could never hurt more than it did every day of my life just being me.
03:29I stayed because I thought if anyone could change me,
03:33could make me not me,
03:36it was you,
03:38the greatest Kung Fu teacher in all of China.
03:41But I can change you!
03:43I can turn you into the Dragon Warrior!
03:46And I will!
03:47Come on!
03:48Tai Lung is on his way here right now!
03:50And even if it takes him a hundred years to get here,
03:53how are you gonna change this into the Dragon Warrior?
03:57Huh?
04:01How?
04:02How?
04:04How?
04:08I don't know!
04:18I don't know.
04:27That's what I thought.
04:32What's the same thing?
04:57This is what you train me for.
05:16Tigress!
05:21Don't try and stop me!
05:23We're not trying to stop you!
05:27What?
05:28We're coming with you!
05:53We're pushing you.
05:54I want to stop you.
05:55I've got you.
05:56I've got you.
05:57I'm not going to stop you.
05:58Hey!
06:00Hey, hey!
06:01Hey, hey!
06:02Hey!
06:03Hey, hey.
06:04Hey!
06:05Hey!
06:08Hey!
06:09Hey!
06:10Hey!
06:11What are you?
06:41What? I keep going upset, okay?
06:48Oh, no need to explain. I just thought you might be monkey.
06:51He hides his almond cookies on the top shelf.
07:11Don't tell monkey. Look at you.
07:17Yeah, I know. I disgust you.
07:20No, no. I mean, how did you get up there?
07:23I don't know. I guess... I don't know. I was getting a cookie.
07:28And yet you are ten feet off the ground and have done a perfect split.
07:33No, this? This is just an accident.
07:41There are no accidents. Come with me.
07:55I know you're trying to be all mystical and kung fu-y.
07:58But could you at least tell me where we're going?
08:11You dragged me all the way out here.
08:15For a bath?
08:20Panda, we do not wash our pits in the pool of sacred tears.
08:25Huh? The pool of...
08:27This is where Oogway unraveled the mysteries of harmony and focus.
08:33This is the birthplace of kung fu.
08:37Huh?
08:51Do you want to learn kung fu?
08:53Yeah.
08:54Then I am your master.
08:57Okay.
08:59Don't cry.
09:01Okay.
09:02When you focus on kung fu, when you concentrate, you stink.
09:14But perhaps that is my fault.
09:16I cannot train you the way I have trained the five.
09:19I now see that the way to get through to you is with this.
09:24Oh, great.
09:25Because I am hungry.
09:27Good.
09:29When you have been trained, you may eat.
09:31Let's begin.
09:33Let's begin.
09:43Thank you for coming to Dragon Warrior Noodles and Tofu.
09:47More tea?
09:48Lemon sauce?
09:49If you need anything, just ask.
09:54Tea of fury!
09:56Oh, the Dragon Warrior's mop.
09:58He mopped these very floors.
10:00Uh, uh, no touching.
10:02You'll get the mop dirty.
10:04He once waited on me.
10:05Awesome!
10:06Yeah, I have the stain to prove it.
10:08Hey, where's the Dragon Warrior?
10:10Oh, he doesn't work here anymore.
10:13He's busy out there protecting the valley.
10:16The Dragon Warrior!
10:18Po!
10:21Uh, I hear you.
10:23Okay.
10:24The Dragon Warrior!
10:25You should have told me you were coming.
10:26Hi, Dad.
10:27I would have saved you some stinky tofu.
10:29Uh, um, Dad, can I talk to you?
10:31Of course, son.
10:33Uh, in honor of my son, free tofu dessert for everybody!
10:39Yay!
10:40With purchases.
10:41Aw!
10:42Oh, it's so good to see you, Po.
10:45Have you lost weight?
10:47I can almost put my wings around you.
10:49Uh, well, maybe a little.
10:51Oh, poor you!
10:52You must feel weak!
10:54Let me get you some soup!
10:55Oh, no, that's okay, Dad.
10:56I'm not hungry.
10:57Not hungry?
10:58Po, are you all right?
11:00Yeah, yeah, no, I'm fine.
11:01I just...
11:02Earlier today, I was fighting these bandits.
11:04Uh-huh.
11:05Nothing too dangerous.
11:07I mean, they were just, you know...
11:08Yeah?
11:09And then the strangest thing happened.
11:11Uh, I had this crazy vision.
11:13I think I saw my mom and me as a baby.
11:17What?
11:18Mom?
11:19A baby?
11:20Um, Dad.
11:22What are you talking about?
11:25How do I say this?
11:28Where did I come from?
11:30Well, you see, uh, son, baby geese come from a little egg.
11:40Uh, don't ask me where the egg comes from.
11:43Dad, that's not what I meant.
11:45I know it's not.
11:48I think it's time I told you something.
11:50I should have told you a long time ago.
11:53Okay.
11:55You...
11:57Might have been kind of a...
12:00Uh...
12:01Uh...
12:03Adopted.
12:05I knew it.
12:06You knew?
12:07Well, who told you?
12:08No one. I mean, come on, Dad.
12:10But if you knew, why didn't you ever say anything?
12:13Why didn't you say anything?
12:17How did I get here, Dad? Where did I come from?
12:21Actually, you came from this.
12:29It was just another day at the restaurant.
12:32Time to make the noodles.
12:34I went out to the back where my vegetables had just been delivered.
12:39There were cabbages, tunas, radishes.
12:43Only, there were no radishes.
12:45Just a very hungry baby panda.
12:52There was no note.
12:54Of course, you could have eaten it.
12:56I waited for someone to come looking for you.
13:00But no one did.
13:01No one did.
13:25I brought you inside.
13:27And...
13:29Fed you?
13:33Gave you a bath.
13:37And fed you again.
13:42And again.
13:46And tried to put some pants on you.
13:48And then I made a decision that would change my life forever.
14:03To make my soup without radishes.
14:06And to raise you as my own son, Xiao Po, my little panda.
14:16And from that moment on, both my soup and my life have been that much sweeter.
14:24And little Po, that's the end of the story.
14:28Look at me. No, don't look at me.
14:31That's it? That can't be it. There's gotta be more, Dad.
14:36Well, there was a time you ate all my bamboo furniture. It was important, too.
14:43One dumpling, please. Dragon warrior size.
14:51Oh, Po. Your story may not have such a happy beginning, but look how it turned out.
14:57You got me, you got kung fu, and you got noodles.
15:01I know. I just have so many questions.
15:03Like, how did I ever fit in this tiny basket? Why didn't I like pants?
15:07And who am I?
15:19Good. Watch your form.
15:21Good.
15:25Good.
15:27Good.
15:29I'm still here.
15:31Take it now.
15:33Please.
15:35Keep moving.
15:37You got your ass.
15:41Oh.
15:42Ah.
15:43Ah.
15:44Oh!
15:45Ah.
15:46Ah.
15:47Ah.
15:48Ah.
15:49Ah.
15:50Ah.
15:51Ah.
15:52good afternoon gentlemen now we've got the pleasantries out of the way
16:05please leave my house your house yes didn't you see the peacock on the front
16:12door ah there you are so sale it seems your fortune-telling skills are not as
16:21good as you thought we shall see shen oh you shall see old goat where were we what do you want shen
16:29what is rightfully mine gongman city gongman is under the stewardship of the master's council
16:37and we will protect it even from you i'm so glad you feel that way otherwise i'd have drag that here
16:47for nothing what's in the box shen you want to see it's a gift if it's your parting gift
16:55in that it will part you part of you here part of you there and part of you
17:00waiting with this tightening the wall you insolent fool
17:05show off that is a warning
17:26are you familiar with the master of gongman city master thundering rhino yes son of legendary flying
17:53rhino yes and slayer of the ten thousand serpents in the valley of woe he's dead whoa that's
18:00impossible rhino's horn defense is impervious to any technique it was no technique lord shen has
18:06created a weapon one that breathes fire and spits metal unless he is stopped this could mean the end
18:14of kung fu but i just got kung fu and now you must save it go destroy this weapon and bring lord shen
18:23to justice okay here we go here we go whoa whoa whoa whoa whoa wait a second how can i do this i mean
18:30how can kung fu stop something that stops kung fu remember dragon warrior anything is possible
18:36when you have inner peace
18:38when you have inner peace
18:46you
18:47you
18:51you
19:01What is this place?
19:26Uh, my brother's farm?
19:29Ah, if I stepped on you, would you die?
19:34Y-yes.
19:37The mortal realm.
19:40You hear that, Oogway? I'm back.
19:44Kai has returned!
19:48Who?
19:50Kai. General Kai.
19:52Supreme Warlord of all China.
19:55The Jade Slayer.
19:58Master of Pain.
20:01You may know me as the Beast of Vengeance.
20:04Maker of Widows.
20:06Eh.
20:08Okay, I used to work with Oogway.
20:10Oh, Master Oogway!
20:12He was a great warrior.
20:13We've heard of Master Oogway.
20:14Okay, okay.
20:15Silence!
20:16Find Oogway's students and bring them to me.
20:33By the time I am done with them, Oogway, there will be no one left who will even remember your name.
20:41Ha, ha, ha, ha!
20:43Kai's coming!
20:48I am ready.
20:49What?
20:50Time!
20:51To teach you a lesson.
20:52Teach me?
20:53Oh, no!
20:54It's the Dragon Teacher!
20:55Yeah, he's so handsome!
20:56Thank you for the compliment.
20:57Water!
20:58Water!
21:01No, please don't teach me to death!
21:04Paul?
21:05Oh, hey, Dad.
21:06What's up?
21:08I was just, uh, stopping by for a little soak.
21:16Okay.
21:17What's wrong?
21:18Nothing.
21:19Nothing?
21:20I wanted to find you taking a bath with your dolls.
21:22I can't figure.
21:23And instead of adding bath salts in the water, you just added Szechuan peppercorns.
21:27Szechuan wa-
21:29Oh, oh, oh, oh!
21:30My tenders!
21:34Okay, yes, something's wrong.
21:35There, there, son.
21:36You tell your daddy all about it.
21:38Lift your arm.
21:39Well, Shifu says I don't know what it means to be the Dragon Warrior.
21:43Now I have to be a teacher?
21:45I thought I finally knew who I was.
21:47If I'm not the Dragon Warrior, then who am I?
21:49A teacher?
21:50Teaching Kung Fu?
21:51Oh, oh, that's a promotion.
21:54Take the job, son.
21:55And someday when you're in charge of the whole J Palace, I can sell noodles in the lobby.
22:01Why are you still here taking a bath like a baby?
22:03Get out!
22:04Get out!
22:05Go, go, go!
22:06Franchise expansion awaits us!
22:08What about the Dragon Warrior look-alike contest?
22:10Oh, Mrs. Chow always wins that.
22:12Skadoosh.
22:14And the Dragon Warrior dumpling eating contest?
22:16I have to defend my title.
22:17No one's gonna beat your dumpling eating record.
22:20Someone's about to beat your dumpling eating record!
22:22Go!
22:23Go!
22:24Go!
22:25Go!
22:26Who's eating my dumplings?
22:27Who's paying for them?
22:28Go!
22:29100!
22:30Go!
22:31101!
22:32102!
22:33Go!
22:34Go!
22:35Go!
22:36Go!
22:37Go!
22:38Go!
22:39Go!
22:41Who are you?
22:52I'm Li Shan.
22:54What?
22:57I'm Li Shan.
22:59I'm looking for my son.
23:05You lost your son?
23:07Yes.
23:09Many years ago.
23:11I lost my father.
23:13I'm very sorry.
23:19Well, good luck to you.
23:23You too.
23:24I hope you find your son.
23:26And I hope you find your father.
23:39Son?
23:40Oh my gosh, it is you!
23:44Well, don't just stand there.
23:45Give your old man a hug!
23:49I can't believe you're alive!
23:51Oh, I thought I lost you forever, Little Lotus.
24:00Uh, okay.
24:02This is very embarrassing, but I think you've got me confused with a panda named Lotus.
24:05My name is Poe.
24:06Oh, right.
24:08You wouldn't...
24:08Oh, okay.
24:10See, Little Lotus was the name you were given at birth.
24:13Really?
24:14Really?
24:14I can't believe it.
24:15After all these years and you're really here?
24:17This is amazing.
24:19Oh, Dad!
24:20Come, say hi to...
24:22Um, I don't know...
24:23I don't know what I'm supposed to call you.
24:25I'm pretty sure he said his name is Lee.
24:27You.
24:29Come here.
24:31Oh, thank you.
24:33Thank you for taking such good care of my son.
24:36Your son?
24:37Now hold on just a minute.
24:38How do we know this stranger is even related to you?
24:43Look at that!
24:44Our bellies could be brothers!
24:47Hey, son, let me teach you how to belly gong.
24:49All right.
24:50Belly gong!
24:50Jiggle the same!
24:52What?
24:52It's like looking in a fat mirror.
24:57I can't believe we're taking a picture together.
25:01Huh?
25:03But I still don't understand.
25:05I thought Poe was the only panda left.
25:07Oh, no!
25:09There's a whole bunch of us.
25:11Where?
25:11Here.
25:12A secret panda village in the mountain.
25:15A secret panda...
25:15Shh!
25:16Whoa!
25:18But how did you know where I was?
25:19I received a message that led me here.
25:23How could you receive a message if no one could find you?
25:27Sounds suspicious to me.
25:29Hmm...
25:29No, it was a message from the universe.
25:32Whoa!
25:33Whoa!
25:33Rats.
25:34Now, what's all this about a dragon warrior?
25:38How did you know I was a dragon warrior?
25:40Did the universe tell you that, too?
25:41Oh!
25:43No, the poster did.
25:44And the gift shop.
25:45I bought a tiny cup.
25:47Oh, right!
25:48Of course!
25:49You guys, you have no idea.
25:51There's so much to show you.
25:52You're going to be so awesomely proud.
25:54Come on!
25:55Come on!
25:57I'm already awesomely proud.
26:04A couple more steps.
26:06Healing the burn.
26:08Do you have panda asthma, too?
26:10Does that run in the valley?
26:12Dad, you're going to love this.
26:14It's like the coolest thing ever.
26:16This is the Hall of Heroes.
26:20Home of the most priceless kung fu artifacts in all of China.
26:23Whoa!
26:24This place is...
26:26Awesome?
26:27What were you going to say?
26:27You were going to say awesome, right?
26:28Because it totally is!
26:29Totally!
26:30But be super careful.
26:31Everything's very fragile here.
26:32Like the urn of whispering warriors.
26:34Someone broke that once.
26:36Who?
26:37Some idiot.
26:38Wow!
26:39This is Master Flying Rhino's battle armor!
26:41I wonder if I could fit in that.
26:44Get out of my head, Dad!
26:45I've wondered the same thing!
26:47If I could fit in it?
26:48If you could know.
26:48If I could fit in it.
26:49Oh.
26:49Dad, check it out!
26:51Master Ram's crossbow, the infamous gate smasher.
26:54Dad, look at this!
26:55The battle helmets of Master Rat's army.
26:57They're so tiny!
26:59Master Dolphin's waterproof armor.
27:01This is my favorite.
27:02Check it out.
27:03It's the legendary battle rickshaw of Emperor Hawk.
27:07Sweet ride.
27:09Dad, what are you doing?
27:10We're not supposed to touch anything.
27:12Oh, sorry.
27:12Sorry.
27:13Should I put it back?
27:14Yeah, you probably should.
27:16You look so cool, though.
27:19How does it feel?
27:20Do the hinges hinge?
27:21Does it smell like rhino?
27:22Does it feel like you're impenetrable?
27:24Does it feel like you could take on a thousand warriors?
27:27And emerge unscathed?
27:30Yeah, it's pretty cool.
27:33Oh.
27:34I wonder what this does.
27:35I should pull it.
27:35I think I just peed a little.
27:47I think I just peed a little.
27:47I think I love it.
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