- yesterday
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00:00Previously, on the summer I turned pretty, I told everyone that I applied to Finch because it was a good school.
00:17The truest of all was that I just wanted to be near him.
00:21Now here we are.
00:22We are gonna do this for the rest of our lives.
00:24I got off the waitlist for study abroad.
00:26Paris.
00:27Have you and Conrad started your speech for the dedication ceremony?
00:30Half of Cousins is coming to see Susanna's memorial garden.
00:33I want to get my cap and gown and my name wasn't on the list.
00:35I'm not graduating.
00:36We keep coming back to each other.
00:38It feels like it's never really over.
00:39I got that summer clinic job.
00:41Have you ever been in love?
00:42Once.
00:43So what was her name?
00:44Belly.
00:45Wait, like your brother's girlfriend?
00:46Hey, Jer.
00:47Look, I am not gonna be able to make the dedication.
00:51Oh, it happens in Cabos.
00:52Days in Cabos.
00:54Did you hook up with Lacey Barone during spring break?
00:56Shit.
00:57It happened when we were on a break.
00:58It didn't mean anything to me.
00:59It means something to me!
01:00I swear to you!
01:01You ruined everything!
01:20Bells, can we go on a coffee run?
01:23I thought you said you had to get at least a B on your media ethics midterm or you were so screwed.
01:30Fine.
01:32You are no fun.
01:33Hmm.
01:34Hmm.
01:35Hmm.
01:36Wait, what's this important flight update for Cabo?
01:42Since when are you going to Cabo?
01:44Yeah, I told you about the last minute flight of boats.
01:47Uh, I think I would have remembered you going to Mexico.
01:50Oh, well, Bells, this is my last spring break and you're gonna be in Philly, so...
01:54Yeah, but we said we might meet up in Cousins.
01:57And I thought you were trying to spend more time with your dad.
01:59Okay, don't try to guilt trip me about my dad.
02:02I just saw him last weekend.
02:04Did something happen with you guys?
02:06You've been kind of moody since then.
02:09Something worse than visiting my dead mom's grave?
02:11No.
02:12Hey, okay, that's...
02:14That's not fair.
02:15I just, I think you're being a little bit selfish.
02:19Okay, sorry.
02:20Can you just stop riding me?
02:22If you want to come to Cabo, then just come.
02:23No, I don't want to crash your boys' trip.
02:25It's not just boys.
02:26The sororities are going too.
02:27Oh, so girls were invited, just not girlfriends. Cool.
02:31Look, I promise I'm not interested in whatever wet t-shirt contest
02:34or whatever it is that you're picturing.
02:36It's not that.
02:37Then what is it?
02:38What is wrong with you right now?
02:39You're the one who didn't even tell me that you're leaving the country.
02:41Yeah, because you hate anything having to do with frats.
02:43When did I ever say that?
02:45You don't have to.
02:46I can feel you judging us.
02:47Sorry if I'm a dumbass who's probably gonna bomb his midterm.
02:50Sorry if I want to have a little fun at spring break,
02:51and I'm sorry that I'm not some straight-A overachiever
02:54going to med school like Conrad.
02:55Oh my God, what?
02:57Please, please don't put your inferiority complex on me.
03:00I wonder where that came from.
03:02Well, it didn't start with me, so maybe look at your dad.
03:05Wow.
03:06Well, if you think I'm so stupid and selfish, then why are you even with me?
03:09Fuck it, I won't waste your time.
03:11You're being ridiculous right now.
03:13You think everything I do is ridiculous and I'm sick of it.
03:15So let's just end it.
03:17Are you serious?
03:18Yes, I'm serious.
03:19Okay, fine, if that's how you feel.
03:21It is.
03:22Great, okay, awesome, bye.
03:23Bye.
03:27I went home for spring break and we still hadn't talked.
03:33I can't believe it's been five days and he still hasn't texted me.
03:36Haven't you also not texted him?
03:39Yeah, but he's the one who picked the fight out of nowhere.
03:42Why don't you just come with me to New York for a couple of days?
03:45We can, like, run around the city after I crushed my interview.
03:48I'm too depressed.
03:49Stop looking at Instagram.
03:51I just still don't even know what the hell happened.
03:53See?
03:56Okay, I'm heading out.
03:57Bye, Mom.
03:59Well, the good news is he looks emotionally destroyed.
04:02I mean, I knew he was down about his grades, but I...
04:05Just stop obsessing.
04:06You wanna know what's going on?
04:08Why don't you ask him?
04:09Yeah, but he's the one who...
04:10Just talk to him when he gets back.
04:12Guys are like dogs.
04:13They hide when they've screwed up.
04:15And even the world's best boyfriend is gonna fuck up sometimes.
04:18You know he feels bad about it.
04:20Like, it's Jer.
04:21You're his oxygen.
04:22He can't breathe without you.
04:24I really thought Taylor was right.
04:31So when we got back to school, I went to see him.
04:36Are you really not gonna come find me?
04:38I mean, you pick a fight and walk out the door and I don't hear from you for a week?
04:42I'm a total asshole, Belly.
04:44I fucked up and I fucked up really bad.
04:46Hey, no, it's okay.
04:50No.
04:52No, it's not.
04:53I've had a shitty week and I took it out on you.
04:57I'm just sorry.
04:58I'm sorry, Belly.
04:59Look, I mean...
05:01We had a fight.
05:03It's not the end of the world.
05:07What does this mean?
05:09Does this mean you wanna get back together?
05:12We never stopped being together.
05:19Belly...
05:20When I was in Cabo...
05:24I thought...
05:25I thought...
05:26I just thought we'd lose.
05:34I just can't believe I almost lost you over something so stupid.
05:37You could never lose me.
05:40You could never lose me.
05:47Uh...
05:50Uh...
05:52I got you this.
05:53I was just on the beach and I was just thinking about you.
05:55I didn't even know if you would ever talk again, but...
05:58It's really stupid and you don't have to wear it.
06:00No.
06:02I love it.
06:06I love you.
06:07I love you.
06:11I love you both.
06:20I love you, Chloe.
06:23Worith.
06:26Taylor's here.
06:51I'm asleep.
06:53Got it.
06:56She's asleep.
07:00Okay, I just want to talk to her.
07:02I think she should rest right now.
07:04Okay.
07:05Fine.
07:06This is a breakfast burrito, extra crispy bacon, the way she likes it.
07:09Just make sure she eats something.
07:11Okay.
07:13Bye.
07:20Ellie, I swear, I obviously had no idea about Lacey.
07:24You know I would have killed them both for you.
07:26Okay?
07:27Please just call me back.
07:28Like, just call me back.
07:31Oh, no.
07:31I wouldn't get any closer unless you want your balls cut off.
07:34Please just tell me how she is.
07:35I don't know.
07:36She won't talk to me either.
07:37Your side chick is in my sorority, so now I'm just, like, guilty by association.
07:41Taylor, please hear me out.
07:42No, I have always been on your side.
07:44I was the freaking CEO of Team Jeremiah now to find out that you're this scummy little
07:47fucking hot tub cheater.
07:48It's insane.
07:49I didn't cheat.
07:50We were on a break.
07:51No.
07:51That's bullshit.
07:52You're not getting off on this, like, technicality.
07:55You were broken up for all of two seconds, Jeremiah.
07:58And then you got her this, like, cheap-ass puka shell bracelet to make it up to her.
08:02Like, what are you doing?
08:03What are you thinking?
08:04What?
08:04You're the expert on cheating now, huh?
08:06Excuse me?
08:06You heard me.
08:08How are Davis and Mia?
08:10Don't turn it around on me.
08:12You were supposed to be the ideal.
08:14You were supposed to deserve her.
08:16But you don't, and you probably never did.
08:21Can you get out of here?
08:33Hey, this is Taylor.
08:34Leave a message.
08:38Adam called you in for this meeting, too, huh?
08:41Yep.
08:41Yeah.
08:42Fine way to spend a Sunday.
08:44Sitting in the background while the grown-ups talk.
08:47Did you, uh, get to the dossier I sent you on Friday?
08:50Yep.
08:51Yep.
08:52Yep.
08:52Yeah.
08:52Yeah.
08:53So you saw it at Starrcade X?
08:57Starrcade X?
08:57Like, like, the gaming startup?
08:59Oh, my God.
08:59I knew you were a gamer.
09:00Jesus, be a bigger nerd cliche, please.
09:02Wait, no.
09:03No, relax.
09:04All right, I used to program that shit.
09:06Computer Engineering at Princeton?
09:08Right.
09:08Remember?
09:09Yes.
09:09How could I forget?
09:10It is in your email signature.
09:12Mm-hmm.
09:13Look, just do me a favor, all right?
09:15Read the dossier, and then call your girlfriend.
09:19Okay?
09:20Yeah.
09:21Well, I actually, um, I actually broke up with my girlfriend.
09:25That was, uh, that was my, my ex.
09:27Well, ex?
09:28Ex?
09:28Oh, my God.
09:29No, no, no.
09:29Stop.
09:30Immediately, no.
09:31I, no personal stuff, all right?
09:33I'm not the co-worker who's going to be invested in your little dramas.
09:37I don't care.
09:39Yeah.
09:41All right.
09:42Um, Starrcade X?
09:44Every VC shop is going to try to move on this company, all right?
09:46So we really need to be on the ball with us.
09:48Copy.
09:49Copy.
09:50Got you.
10:21You just have to make it to the library.
10:34One thing at a time.
10:37Yeah, but everything leads to him.
10:41Like, I, I can't just study.
10:44I also have to call and quit my summer job, because obviously I'm not going to be in Cousins.
10:51Because Jeremiah.
10:53And then I have to figure out how to tell my mom that I can't bring myself to go to Susanna's memorial,
10:59because, again, Jeremiah.
11:02And I might never even go to the summer house again because of fucking Jeremiah.
11:05So, okay, one thing at a time is not going to work for you.
11:08No, no, nothing's going to work, because everything is.
11:12Oh, my God.
11:17Hey, you're going to be okay.
11:19I'll meet you after a study group.
11:22It's not just Lacey I can't avoid.
11:25I see Jeremiah everywhere.
11:27Hung all my clothes in the closet you made.
11:31Even when he isn't really there.
11:33She's in the boxes, I send them your way.
11:35Hoping life brings you no new pain.
11:39I rearrange my memories.
11:44I try to rewrite my life.
11:47But no matter how I try to.
11:54And no matter how I want to.
12:00And no matter how easy things could be if I did.
12:09And no matter how guilty I still feel saying it.
12:16How much I hated you.
12:18Our shadows dance in a parallel plane.
12:23Just two different endings you learn to repair.
12:26And I learn to keep me in one place.
12:30Everywhere I go, there's a memory of us from when we were golden.
12:36Everybody.
12:36Me.
12:36Yeah.
12:38Beautiful.
12:40No, it's so cute.
12:41I couldn't live in my house.
12:45So, I just need to not be here.
12:48Hi.
13:00Mom, hi.
13:01Um, quick question.
13:02Can you send me my birth certificate overnight, if possible?
13:06Hello to you too, my loving daughter.
13:08I'm fine.
13:08Thanks for asking.
13:09How are you?
13:10Sorry.
13:11How are you, Mom?
13:12I had an extremely dull conference, which means I am nowhere near your birth certificate.
13:17What do you need it for, anyway?
13:19A passport.
13:20I found out I got off the wait list for Paris.
13:25That's fantastic.
13:26Honey, congratulations.
13:30How's JR taking it?
13:31I know he'll miss you, but he must be so proud.
13:34Yeah.
13:34Um, Mom, I gotta go.
13:38Okay.
13:39Love you.
13:44Bro, you're tweaking.
13:47You need to level out.
13:50Try some of the indica I got.
13:51May help ease the pain.
13:53I just lost the most important person in my life.
13:56Sorry if I don't have the energy to be alive.
13:58Oh, you don't think I know about breakups?
13:59I know about breakups.
14:00You saw me after Sean.
14:02You two were together for two seconds, Redbird.
14:04Felt like something to me.
14:05I can't believe I fucked it up this bad.
14:08Dude, I dig your girl.
14:10I really do.
14:11And I say this with love, but...
14:13You two were broken up.
14:15Right?
14:15And you were wasted as hell.
14:17And Lacey was all over your shit.
14:18Bro, it's not an excuse.
14:20I should have told her as soon as I got back.
14:22Yeah.
14:24Yeah, probably.
14:24Probably.
14:34Belly's been the center of my world since I lost my mom.
14:43She's everything to me.
14:46And losing her feels like...
14:50It feels like I'm losing the best part of myself.
14:55Well, that's beautiful, man.
15:02So fight for her.
15:04Stop saying you're sorry.
15:05Find a way to show her.
15:09Make it sound so easy.
15:11I don't think it's supposed to be.
15:12I just can't believe it.
15:18He acts so devoted, but he's just as shady as the rest.
15:22I swear, if he comes to our dorm, it's on sight.
15:25Don't smile, please.
15:27That won't be a problem.
15:28It kind of sucks you're not leaving for Paris tomorrow.
15:32Do you think I'm being too hard on him?
15:34Look, if you really thought you were broken up,
15:39technically it's not cheating, but to keep it a secret,
15:43that tells me he knew what he did was wrong,
15:46and he chose to keep it from you.
15:48That's the part I can't get over.
15:52What Annika didn't know was that I had a secret, too.
15:57It was the day after Christmas last year.
16:00My mom was at a writer's retreat.
16:02Steven was visiting friends.
16:03Jer was going skiing with his dad and Conrad.
16:06I figured, why be home alone
16:08when I could be at my favorite place in the world.
16:11So I borrowed Steven's car and went to Cousins.
16:20Shit.
16:22Shit, shit, shit.
16:24Oh, my God.
16:25Okay, what would Kevin do?
16:26What would Kevin do?
16:28Okay.
16:29Okay.
16:38Steven, open up.
16:44It's me.
16:50Billy.
16:51You okay?
16:53Yeah.
16:54Yeah.
16:54Sorry.
16:55Just the flash got to me.
16:57Okay.
16:58Next.
16:59Next.
16:59Next.
17:01Billy.
17:12No, please, don't leave.
17:13I made the biggest mistake of my life.
17:15Please, just talk to me.
17:18Look, I'll tell you anything.
17:20I'll tell you anything.
17:20I just don't want any more secrets between us.
17:24Okay.
17:25Okay.
17:25How did it happen?
17:32Look, I was really sad.
17:33I was drunk.
17:36She was just there.
17:40How many times?
17:46Twice.
17:49Jared, how could you do this to me?
17:51Billy, please.
17:52I know I don't deserve you, but I love you more than anyone else in the world, and it
17:56kills me to see you hurting, and I would do anything to take it back.
17:59Stop.
18:00You can't undo what you did.
18:02Billy, please.
18:04I'm sorry.
18:05I'm so sorry.
18:05I've never loved anyone but you.
18:08I love him, too, and I want to forgive him.
18:12I just don't know how.
18:16You were supposed to be the one person who would never hurt me.
18:22And are you the person who hurt me the most?
18:33Laurel.
18:35Elliot.
18:36Hey.
18:36Hey.
18:38Oh, fancy books you got there.
18:40Oh, yeah.
18:40You know, well, I've already read the Moncrief translation twice, so...
18:43As one does.
18:44Yeah.
18:45Yeah, I've decided it's the year that I finally read A La Recherche du Temps Perdue in the
18:51original French.
18:52Go for it.
18:53Live on the edge.
18:55You know, um, you and I, we could start our own book group if, uh, if you're interested.
19:01Ah, unfortunately, Professor Park dropped out of French her first year of college.
19:05John?
19:06What are you doing here?
19:07Open up a word with you.
19:09In private.
19:10Professor.
19:10Professor.
19:11Okay.
19:13See you later, Elliot.
19:14Uh, sure.
19:16Yeah.
19:16Um, I'll be at the, uh, Flaubert Symposium if you want to drop by.
19:20Okay.
19:21Sounds great.
19:22Okay.
19:26What was that?
19:27So, TAs are allowed to flirt with professors now?
19:29He's an adjunct, and maybe I was flirting back.
19:32Well, and I was doing him a favor.
19:34You'd have eaten him alive in, well, five minutes.
19:36What's a history professor doing at a lit conference, anyway?
19:38Researching potential crossover courses.
19:41Our provost is looking for ways to make history sexy again.
19:45And a lit conference is definitely the way to do that.
19:48Shoot me, Dad.
19:49Please make your way into Ballroom B for tropes of old English epic poetry.
19:58That sounds...
19:59Worrying as shit.
20:00Yeah.
20:02Okay.
20:05New plan.
20:07We find somewhere to drink this.
20:08Steal a wine opener.
20:09I can't do that.
20:10Oh, you're right.
20:26Okay.
20:27Welcome to day one.
20:29By the end of the summer, I expect half of you will still be here.
20:33Don't piss me off, and we'll be fine.
20:37Okay.
20:38First patient.
20:39We have a 15-year-old boy, came in following a seizure.
20:43Any thoughts on what might be going on?
20:46I want to start off with our first years.
20:48What do you say?
20:49Well, it could be puberty hormones.
20:54He's 15.
20:55Could also...
20:55He's also recovering from the flu, and fevers are the most common cause of seizures at his age.
21:00Very good.
21:01They also gave him nausea meds at the ER, and that does increase risk.
21:04Good catch.
21:06Sometimes it's just the obvious answer.
21:08Absolutely.
21:09Thank you, Dr. Namazi.
21:10I'll keep that in mind.
21:11Okay.
21:12Next patient.
21:13Are you trying to make me the med student that gets cut on day one?
21:17I'm sure it's just a mess.
21:18It's fine.
21:19I'll take that.
21:19I'll make it up in the next one.
21:21Look, I know that climbing up Namazi's ass is just a coping mechanism for your all-consuming
21:24love for your brother's girlfriend.
21:26Why did I tell you that?
21:27Because you were, like, yearning to.
21:30Whatever.
21:31Safest place to hang out at an academic conference is in the hotel gym.
21:37Nice!
21:37Give me your phone.
21:38Mine's dead, and I want to call the kids.
21:40It's in my room.
21:41Also, the kids are fine.
21:42Also, you're upside down.
21:44Yes.
21:44Yes, I am.
21:47What are you doing?
21:51Getting some things off my chest.
21:53Why did I ask?
21:55You know, even though our marriage went to shit, we ended up being pretty good co-parents.
22:02Yes, we did.
22:07Oh, my God.
22:08I just remembered.
22:10Belly called me today to say she is studying abroad next semester in Paris.
22:15Oh, do you know how the Parisian police found Quasimodo?
22:20They followed a hunch.
22:23Please never tell that joke again.
22:25You used to love my jokes.
22:27You used to laugh so hard beer would come out your nose.
22:29In fact, wasn't that why you slept with me on our first date?
22:32I was fake laughing, and I planned to sleep with you all along.
22:35You did.
22:40Mind if I work in?
22:40Uh, no, it's all yours.
22:43No, we're done here.
22:44Appreciate it.
22:44Why are you here?
23:00Why are you here?
23:01What are you...
23:02You haven't responded to my text all day.
23:04It's finals.
23:05It's a stressful time.
23:06Hey, are you okay?
23:08What's wrong?
23:10I'm hungry.
23:12Okay, then let's just grab some food.
23:15Come on, get in.
23:16Okay.
23:36So, uh...
23:38Uh, where do you want to go eat?
23:42I don't know.
23:43I don't know.
23:49What?
23:54I broke up with Mia.
24:01I hope you didn't do that for me.
24:04What?
24:07What?
24:08Uh, sorry.
24:09I just...
24:11I thought you'd be happy that I just wanted to be with you.
24:14Even after the other night, sleeping over...
24:16Steven, I...
24:17You're wrong.
24:18And I've told you before.
24:19I just want this to be casual.
24:20Okay, it's never casual with you and me.
24:23Taylor, you know that.
24:24Oh, my God.
24:25Let's just stop fucking around, you know, and do it for real so we don't keep hurting other people.
24:28They don't even know about us.
24:29That doesn't matter.
24:29It's still messed up.
24:32Taylor, I want you and me to have a fresh start.
24:34You know, free and clear and clean.
24:36Steven, we've tried before.
24:38We've tried a million times.
24:39We were kids, then.
24:40We don't work.
24:40It never works.
24:41Taylor, you are the only girl I want to be with.
24:44I'm telling you.
24:45I think I love you.
24:46Stop. Stop.
24:46No, don't.
24:47I can't do this.
24:48What are you talking...
24:49Can you pull over and let me out of the fucking car?
24:51Taylor, no.
24:52Taylor, I need you to listen to me.
24:53Please.
24:53That's all I'm asking for.
24:54Steven, please just let me out of the car.
24:55We're in the middle of the road, Taylor.
24:56I'm not doing that.
24:57I don't care. I want to leave.
24:58Pull over and let me out of the fucking car.
25:01Fine, fine, fine.
25:03Fuck.
25:03Here, I'm pulling over, okay?
25:11Taylor, what the fuck?
25:28Taylor, I told you I don't want...
25:30Oh, my God.
25:36Taylor.
25:37Hi.
25:40I'm really sorry.
25:42What happened?
25:43Were you with him or you were hurt?
25:46What happened?
25:47I wasn't in the car.
25:49Okay.
25:50We were arguing.
25:51I jumped out, and he was trying to come after me.
25:57Okay.
26:00What?
26:07It's just my fault.
26:09No, no, no, it's not your fault.
26:12Yes, it is.
26:14You're with Steven Conklin?
26:15Yeah, yeah.
26:16Is he okay?
26:17Initial scans show a cracked rib and a cerebral contusion.
26:22Cerebral contusion?
26:23It's a bruise on the brain.
26:25We won't know how serious it is until the swelling goes down.
26:27Until then, we'll keep him sedated.
26:30So we just wait and see?
26:31Is that it?
26:31There's some paperwork to fill out,
26:33and someone will need to make decisions on his behalf.
26:35Can that be one of you?
26:37I'm his sister.
26:38His sister works.
26:39Okay.
26:40Um, what kind of decisions do I...
26:42Uh, it's...
26:43It's in the paperwork there.
26:44Uh, I need to...
26:48I need to try my parents again.
26:50I couldn't...
26:50Okay, I'll...
26:51I will try them.
26:52I will do it.
26:54I don't know Steven's fucking insurance,
26:56if he's on our parents' insurance or his job.
26:58How am I supposed to know his fucking blood type?
27:01I think...
27:01I think I remember Steven bragging about being a universal donor.
27:05Of course, you can brag about anything.
27:07Okay, O-negative.
27:12He's O-negative.
27:14Okay.
27:15I'm gonna try your parents again.
27:16I don't...
27:17I think I should, uh, let a few other people know, too.
27:22Do you want me to call Jer?
27:25I don't know an hour ago.
27:28I wanted to throw up thinking about him,
27:29but now I just...
27:32I just wish he was here.
27:34I don't even know what to say to make me feel better.
27:41I'm gonna be your Jer today.
27:44Okay, we'll track down your parents.
27:46I will call Jer's dumbass, too.
27:48Okay, just...
27:49Just fill out the paperwork and leave the rest to me.
27:52I'm gonna do it.
27:54Um, can you call, uh, Conrad, too?
27:56Because he just might understand what all this means.
28:00Yeah, I got you.
28:01I'm gonna call Conrad.
28:04Well, I'll hop on the next flight.
28:08No, it's fine.
28:09Laurel and John will probably be here by then.
28:10Okay.
28:12Well, tell me what the doctor said exactly.
28:15Uh, he's kind of a dick.
28:16He basically blew us off.
28:17We're trying to get updates, but...
28:19Well, maybe I can help.
28:19Where's he admitted?
28:21We're at, um, Providence General.
28:24But how?
28:25I will figure it out.
28:26I just want to do something.
28:32Hey, how's Belly?
28:34She's fine.
28:35Yeah?
28:35Okay.
28:36Yeah.
28:37Yeah, great.
28:38Okay.
28:40Well, just keep me updated, okay?
28:41Yep, will do.
28:42All right.
28:45Dr. Namazi?
28:47Excuse me?
28:48What's up?
28:49A friend of mine was in a car accident.
28:52Uh, very close friend, more like family.
28:54And he's at Providence General.
28:57Is there any chance you know anyone in neurology there?
29:00The head of neurology is a friend of a friend.
29:02Well, his name is Stephen Conklin.
29:03Do you think there's any possible way that you could make a call?
29:09I'll see what I can do.
29:12Do you think you need to take the day?
29:17Uh, no.
29:19I'm good.
29:20Okay.
29:33Jayra's in the lobby.
29:52Yeah, I know, babe.
29:54He just wants to be nearby if we need him.
29:56He's not going to come try and talk to you or anything.
29:59That's so sweet.
30:01Why does he have to be so sweet?
30:04Should I text him?
30:09Isabel Conklin?
30:12I'm Dr. Joon Kwon.
30:13I head up the neurology team.
30:14I'm taking over your brother's case.
30:16Does that mean he's gotten worse?
30:17No, it means someone well-connected is looking out for you.
30:21I got a call from a colleague at Stanford.
30:25Stephen is sedated and sleeping.
30:26He's stable, and I've ordered a CT scan.
30:29Have you seen him yet?
30:31Well, let's get you back there.
30:32We allow two visitors, immediate family only,
30:35so I'll presume this is Stephen's other sister.
30:38Follow me.
30:47Any news on your friend?
30:49No.
30:50You sure you shouldn't just go out there?
30:52I don't even know what I'd do if I did.
30:54It's not like I'm a doctor yet.
30:55Plus, we barely talked over the last few years.
31:00No cell phones?
31:02Yeah.
31:03How did everything go with those blood draws?
31:05Good.
31:06Great.
31:06This is mislabeled.
31:14Oh, that's, uh, that's mine.
31:16That's my mistake.
31:17A mistake that put your patient at risk.
31:19I'll fix it right now.
31:20You should have gone home when I gave you the chance.
31:21It won't happen again.
31:22No, it won't.
31:24You're done here.
31:25You're not ready for this.
31:28You're firing me for one mistake?
31:30Dr. Damazi, please, I didn't...
31:32You may see this as one mistake, but this is about you not knowing your limits, which makes
31:37you a walking liability, my liability.
31:39Dr. Damazi, I...
31:41No.
31:42You can always apply again next year.
31:43Steven, can I tell you a secret?
32:10I've never loved anyone like I love you.
32:13Do you know how scary that is?
32:23I know I act like I don't care, but I just, I care so, so much.
32:33And I'm always afraid that it's just a matter of time before you come to me and you tell me
32:36that I'm not worth it.
32:38You're just gonna be like, actually, you're not worth it.
32:42So I figured if I just keep pushing you away and pretend that you don't mean anything to me,
33:00then you can't hurt me.
33:01And I don't know how to stop doing that.
33:06You know, the first time we got together, you remember you told me that you were like...
33:21You told me that you wouldn't give up on us.
33:24You have no idea how badly I wanted to believe you.
33:30I have good news.
33:49The CT scan is clear.
33:50The CT scan is clear?
33:52What does that mean?
33:53The swelling on Steven's brain has gone down, and we can start weaning him off the sedatives.
33:57It'll be a while until he wakes up.
33:59We'll let you know when he's ready for visitors.
34:05It's okay.
34:06He's gonna be okay.
34:08I've just been scared.
34:09I'm really sorry to dump this on you.
34:19I know you don't think that Steven and I should get back together.
34:21No, I never should have judged you.
34:24But you're right.
34:25I've been all over the place.
34:28Like, not wanting to let go of Steven, but still keeping Davis around is this, like, emotional buffer.
34:33It's shitty.
34:34It's shitty and selfish, and Steven was trying to do the right thing, and I'm just freaked.
34:41But all this, it's, like, I think that it made me realize that even though I'm so scared, I'm so scared to lose Steven again, I'm more scared not to try.
34:58No, I'm gonna, I'm gonna break up with Davis.
35:07Whatever you want to do, I support you.
35:19All right, how rough do I look right now?
35:21Do I look hot?
35:23I'm not gonna lie to you.
35:24I look that bad.
35:28Just go back to the house, eat something, shower.
35:34You heard the doctor.
35:35He's not gonna be up for a little while.
35:37Okay.
35:37Thanks, babe.
35:43Hey.
35:47If you want to get back with Jeremiah, just do it.
35:50I never says that.
35:52I make him beg, obviously, but don't just throw away everything you guys have had for the past four years.
36:02Like, not if it's still what you want.
36:03I like that.
36:04Yeah.
36:08Okay.
36:19Laura.
36:21Mom.
36:23We gotta get up.
36:25Shut up.
36:27Still not a morning person, huh?
36:31My eyes are crispy.
36:35Can you bring me some of your contact solution?
36:38Yeah.
36:49Oh, my God.
36:52John, get in here!
36:55Oh, my God. Mom, where were you?
36:58Belly, I just got your messages.
36:59What's going on?
37:01Steven was in an accident. Is he okay?
37:03He's gonna be fine.
37:05I've been trying to keep it together,
37:07but I was so scared.
37:11Oh, man, shut up.
37:13I can't imagine how terrified you must have been.
37:15I'm so, so sorry.
37:18Have you been there all alone?
37:20No, no.
37:22Um, Taylor's here, and she's been amazing.
37:25And Jer's here.
37:28He stayed all night.
37:30Mom, things have been so crazy.
37:33Listen, sweetheart, I'll be there as soon as I can,
37:35and, um, I'll track down your dad and let him know.
37:39Yeah.
37:40I love you so much, Belly.
37:42I love you, Mommy.
37:45What is that?
37:46Steven was in a car accident?
37:47He's okay.
37:48Okay.
37:49He's gonna be fine.
37:50But Belly couldn't reach either of us last night.
37:52It's okay.
37:53We'll just meet me in the lobby in five.
38:16We hadn't seen each other much over the years,
38:18and we hadn't been alone together since...
38:20Hey.
38:21...that day at the motel.
38:23Hey.
38:24Hey.
38:25Hey.
38:32Why are you holding a poker?
38:34Oh.
38:35Um, I thought you were a burglar.
38:38Of course you did.
38:40Hey.
38:45Where's Jer?
38:46He and your dad are on their way to Chamonix.
38:51Right.
38:52Aren't you supposed to be meeting them there?
38:55Yeah, my flight caught delayed because of the weather.
38:58They were trying to rebook me for the 28th.
39:00Hmm.
39:01What are you doing here?
39:03My mom is on a retreat in the mountains,
39:05and Steven's in New York.
39:07I was all alone at home.
39:09So...
39:34You have chocolate all over your face.
39:35No, I don't.
39:36What do you do?
39:37You just stick your whole head in to save time?
39:39Shut it!
39:42No, I don't.
39:43You cold, I could start a fire.
39:50See, I think it's maybe a little late for a fire.
39:53I think I'm just gonna crash.
39:55Merry Christmas, Belly.
39:56It's really good to see you.
39:57You too.
40:02The next morning, right when I woke up, I had this funny feeling that he had already left.
40:20You're okay?
40:21Oh, no.
40:22Leave me alone.
40:23Are you hurt?
40:24Can you move?
40:25I thought you were gone.
40:26Nope.
40:27Still here.
40:28Let me help you out.
40:29No, no, no.
40:30Ow.
40:31Just give me a minute.
40:32Okay.
40:33How bad does it feel?
40:34Okay.
40:35On a scale from one to ten.
40:36How bad does it hurt?
40:37On a scale from one to ten?
40:38Oh, no.
40:39Leave me alone.
40:40Oh, no.
40:41Leave me alone.
40:42Are you hurt?
40:43Can you move?
40:44I thought you were gone.
40:45No.
40:46Still here.
40:47let me help you out no no no just just give me a minute okay
40:52how bad does it hurt on a scale from one to ten eleven you're such a baby when it comes to pain
41:08i'm not i mean that fall you took was no joke seriously it was like
41:17when animals slip and fall in cartoons on banana peels you calling me an animal
41:22i'm gonna pick you up and i'm gonna carry you to the couch no no no no just just just no just i'm
41:36too heavy for you just okay i know i can't bench press my body weight like jared but i can pick
41:41you up ellie ready okay come on okay ow you're okay ready watch your legs
41:58ow you're okay yeah ow
42:04that's when i had this sudden thought a part of me will always love you
42:15we spent the day together but not together
42:30entertainingly expressive h blank blank blank y
42:47hammy hammy
42:54she's better off with laszlo
43:05you're insane rick and ilsa are obviously meant for each other their little love story is
43:11nothing compared to the work that laszlo was doing for the resistance
43:14oh my god
43:15what
43:17i'm gonna get more firewood
43:18you know you are way too young to be this cynical
43:22yeah
43:23hey
43:31belly
43:32hey sorry my receipts now here is terrible i'm on the mountain freezing my balls off what are you up to
43:36i'm actually in cousins i i got super lonely so i i drove up
43:42oh nice uh did you bring you
43:43no i came by myself
43:46well i wish you were here with me
43:48i'll run supply gum that stuff because of the weather so i'm stuck here with my dad
43:52yeah he um
43:54what
43:55hello
43:56belly can you hear me
43:58jerry i can't hear what you're saying
44:00uh never mind
44:02what
44:03wait uh i'll show you tomorrow
44:06okay bye bells
44:07okay
44:07okay love you
44:09hey i i would have told jerry that you're here too
44:18don't worry about it
44:18i never told jeremiah that conrad was with me at cousins
44:22because there was nothing to tell
44:24nothing happened with conrad
44:26nothing was ever gonna happen
44:28the next morning conrad was gone
44:30he left just like i thought he would
44:46no goodbye just gone like a ghost
44:53conrad fisher the ghost of christmas past
45:07and what
45:08and what difference does it make
45:14when this love is over shall i sleep within your bed
45:24river of unhappiness hold your hands upon my head
45:32till i breathe my last breath
45:37breath
45:38all the woe will always be
45:41the last time that you taught me
45:47all will once ever cease
45:50blast me the mystery of love
45:57come in
46:15hey can you take your shoes off
46:26i'm gonna be here for like a sec
46:27i was just on my way in and
46:29came to rub it in my face that i got fired on day one
46:31no jerk i wanted to see how your friend's doing
46:34yeah he's gonna be okay thanks
46:37good
46:38all right this is for you
46:40thank you
46:41you're welcome
46:43um
46:44so look um
46:47about yesterday
46:49i mean we all know namazi's a hard ass
46:52i'm fine
46:53cool uh that's
46:56actually i was gonna say
46:59that she kind of has a point
47:01oh
47:02i mean look you know i always tell you the truth right
47:05and the truth is that you're smart as hell
47:08obviously but you need to pay more attention to your feelings
47:11excuse me
47:12well you can deny your emotions all you want they're not going anywhere
47:18and as long as you're afraid to face them they'll run you not the other way around
47:24hello would have been nice
47:31hello
47:36steven you ready for a visitor
47:38oh yeah
47:39oh you're awake
47:40ow ow ow ow
47:42careful of his ribs
47:43no no break another one why don't you
47:45it's barely cracked you baby
47:47how's uh
47:48how's mom and dad where are they
47:51they're on their way
47:52hey
47:57uh hi
47:58i'm gonna give you two a minute
48:01i'm glad you're alive
48:08you scared the shit out of everyone
48:10you know that
48:11belly was worried to death
48:12i knew you were just being a drama queen
48:14obviously
48:15i was in a coma
48:17so
48:18yeah but
48:19medically induced
48:21huh
48:26steven i'm joking
48:27i was worried about you too
48:29obviously
48:30yeah yeah you know i've been thinking a lot about what you said since i woke up
48:33you know before the crash
48:34me too
48:35and you were right
48:36you and me we don't work
48:40what
48:47if we
48:48never ran into each other that day in new york
48:50we would have just gone about our lives and been fine so let's just pretend we didn't
49:00i've never been able to think clearly when it comes to you tay
49:03i couldn't let you go
49:07you know i love a challenge
49:10but
49:11it is a wake-up call
49:16you were right
49:18you and me we don't work
49:21hmm
49:22good
49:24then we're on the same page
49:25yeah yeah finally
49:26i'm gonna go find belly
49:27good
49:28then we're on the same page
49:29yeah yeah finally
49:30i'm gonna go find belly
49:31first loves are important
49:44conrad was mine
49:46for the rest of my life i would think of him fondly
49:49the way you do your first pet
49:51the first car you drove
49:53but they're not as important as last
49:56but they're not as important as last
50:10steven's gonna be okay
50:12thank god
50:14do you wanna get some air
50:21yeah
50:23yeah i would love that
50:25i was
50:31i am so mad at you
50:33and you have every right to be
50:35i'm sorry for what i did to you and i'm sorry i didn't tell you sooner
50:38i'm sorry you found out the worst way possible
50:41i know it's gonna take a lot of work for you to even begin to trust me again but i am willing to do whatever it takes if you let me
50:54i'm sorry too
50:57sorry for what
50:59sorry for everything leading up to that fight
51:04to that fight
51:05and to cabo
51:10i can see how you thought we were broken up
51:13you can
51:15yeah but i i don't understand how you could just move on to somebody else so easily
51:22i mean i could barely function
51:25how were you okay enough to have sex with someone
51:27no belly i was completely numb that whole week
51:30i didn't even feel like i was there when lacy and i
51:33when we had sex
51:36after i i just sat in the shower
51:39and cried for i don't i don't even know how long
51:42i was just thinking how could i deserve you
51:45after that
51:46maybe we
51:51shouldn't let one mistake erase all these years
51:55i mean
51:58if we both believe that what we have
52:02is bigger than our mistakes then
52:05maybe we can just start over
52:08i want that
52:10bells i want that so much
52:13you can't ever hurt me like that again
52:16i promise
52:17i promise
52:19i promise
52:23i promise
52:25i don't want to mess this up again
52:27we won't
52:42after steven i get it now
52:44life's too short
52:46not to spend it with the person that you love
52:51i want to be with you always no matter what
52:55i just can't imagine my life without you
52:59me either
53:01elliot's always been our story
53:03yours
53:04and mine
53:05nobody else's
53:10what are you thinking
53:12the future is just crazy
53:16i don't know what say it
53:17would you
53:22yes
53:23you don't even know what i'm about to say
53:25try me
53:29isabel conklin
53:34will you marry me
53:37yes
53:39yeah i'll marry you
53:41i love you
53:52i love you
53:53i love you too
53:55i love you
54:11forever and a day
54:18i bet we already knew our names before we met each other
54:24i bet we've sailed the milky way walked on the sun together
54:30how could i forget those emerald eyes
54:38they took me by surprise but suddenly i missed your face i knew that smile from miles away
54:48i knew that i have loved you
54:51forever and a day
54:59a day
55:02in all my lives i've waited every time to hear you say
55:12i'll be yours forever and a day
55:16i don't believe in destiny
55:33but i might have to say
55:38your melodies
55:38they're changing me
55:46i'm yours forever
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