- 7/16/2025
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Short filmTranscript
00:00DreamWorks Animation has never really been all too consistent, on one hand they'll release acclaimed masterpieces that'll redefine the animation industry, and other times they'll make B-movie but every time they say B, my wife leaves me.
00:10How do you like the smell of flame?
00:12Wake up! Help me!
00:15Also the Croods, but out of all their films, one seems to be a complete enigma, only being mentioned on DeviantArt as well as Chippendale Rescue Rangers on Disney+, that of course being 2009's Monsters vs. Aliens.
00:26A film that's commonly regarded as one of the most forgettable and nothing burger dog water DreamWorks films, and by that I mean Dad's Reviews made a video about it and everybody listened to him.
00:34Goddamnit, he struck again!
00:35Excuse me, can I order a salad?
00:38But is this film really as meh as one proclaims?
00:40Well, no, it has Bob in it.
00:42But I guess it's my job to find out. Here's my look at Monsters vs. Aliens.
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01:47So we start out with the iconic DreamWorks intro, but this time it's all in black and white, oh god Ezra Miller got out, he's kidnapping mine.
01:52And we cut over to the deep abyss of space where we see a planet blowing up, likely being from Beerus the Destroyer.
01:57And we see this meteorite cratering towards the stars, which I can only assume contains the ultimate life form.
02:02But as it slams down towards the earth, we cut to an arctic base with this absolutely disgusting looking burger, dear god.
02:08Why is the bun brown average Arby's eating experience?
02:12And we see this dude playing pedal ball, which is one of my favorite shots in the entire movie, since it's one of those classic 2010s outdated 3D shots.
02:19Truly a relic from the time that we must unbury.
02:22But for once their computers start bleepity blipping, and both of them are shocked that something's actually happening for once.
02:27No one ever told us what to do, the only reason I took the job is because you never have to do anything!
02:31But they determined it's gonna strike down in Modesto, California any second, and they call in a Code Nemoy.
02:35Code Nemoy, I repeat, Code Nemoy!
02:38And just now we get the title card for the movie, and that's not even the finished logo, what the hell.
02:41But as we enter this unsuspecting domicile, we get this POV shot of the intruder, as they walk down the hallway and into this room with a young girl in it.
02:48To which she sees her absolute worst nightmare, white women.
02:56Thomas?!
02:57Nah, I didn't mean-
02:58And they tell her to turn on the TV, it doesn't matter what channel.
03:01And she sees her fiancé on the news weather forecast proclaiming his love.
03:04And I'm just gonna say it right here, the human wilds in this movie are very, very odd-looking, but I kinda love it.
03:10None of them look like that kinda tangled, frozen look that every animated film goes for now.
03:14Instead, they all have these over-exaggerated head shapes and ears, and they're just so fun and goofy.
03:18Though at the same time, they did try to give them all hyper-realistic skin textures.
03:22And if you know me, you know I hate that.
03:24But at least here, the animation's dated enough so it doesn't look all that super-realistic.
03:27Unlike Inside Out 2 and Lightyear and all that garbage.
03:30But as our main protagonist Susan gets ready for her wedding day,
03:33we see that she's voiced by Reese Witherspoon of Legally Blonde and Pig Lady from Sing
03:37in that one Christmas movie they did a Sonic 3 version of the poster.
03:40First page of the script, already two Sonic 3 references, doing good.
03:43Oh yeah, and then there's also her dad.
03:45Ah, my little girl.
03:47I wish to speak to my daughter alone.
03:52And as she comes into the church, she sees her future mother-in-law,
03:54who is probably the most iconic character from this movie,
03:57with her iconic thing that she does with her iconic thumb,
03:59being the fact that her iconic top part of her thumb isn't there.
04:02Derek doesn't have that.
04:03It skips a generation. Your kids are gonna have it!
04:06And as Reese Witherspoon goes out into the little thingy that's in the garden,
04:09I forgot what you call these things,
04:11that thing that Gamer from Mars interviewed Chris Chan in.
04:13Sign the Hedgehog, Mario, Sonic, Kim Possible,
04:16everybody is on that side of the curve.
04:18Iron Man, Iron Man, everybody!
04:20We get to see that this is yet another DreamWorks movie
04:22with that weird mic problem from home.
04:24I mean, handsome. I mean, sorry, I'm just a little frazzled.
04:28Why does it sound like that?
04:30This human's girl got an A in geometry.
04:33And she talks with her fiance, Derek,
04:35who is voiced by Paul Rudd of Ant-Man 3 fame,
04:37who tells her that their honeymoon to Paris has been cancelled.
04:40Yippee!
04:42Cuz he has an audition to become the new evening weather anchor for the Fresno news station.
04:46And while on the inside Susan is devastated,
04:48she pretends not to give a crap and is just delighted that Derek is gonna be just like his hero Sam Sparks.
04:53And as Derek pisses off, Susan Wojcicki hears a rumbling from the sky,
04:56and she sees a giant ass meteor as she's about to get Ice Age collision coursed in this bitch.
05:00And as Miss Susan finds her alive after being nailed by a giant ass space rock,
05:04she drags her back into the church as a mysterious van pulls up.
05:07But cut to the inside and Susan's wedding is underway.
05:09And as the bride gets groomed, Derek takes off her little veil thingy,
05:12only to find that her eyes are glowing green,
05:14only for her to be covered in the greenness and start growing exponentially
05:17in what definitely led to thousands of children being disowned by their parents.
05:20And Susan's hair turns white as she's barely able to be contained by the simple church walls.
05:24And I'm quite fond of the priest's reaction here.
05:26And as everybody runs away in terror, we get this great moment.
05:29And as Susan bursts through the ceiling, the choppers and feds are in pursuit.
05:36And as she grabs Derek, the ground units below Empire strikes back her legs,
05:39making her drop Derek and he bounces off a trampoline to safety,
05:42only for the feds to trank her in the leg like the Sonic 1 trailer.
05:45And as the juju juice goes into effect, she passes out and lands on the ground,
05:51being strapped down and taken away.
05:53Okay, did I do good? Did I make that scene as not weird as humanly possible?
05:57If any of you need counseling after seeing giant-esque footage,
06:00it'll be available in the cafeteria after lunch.
06:02Cut to Susan waking up in solitary confinement,
06:04wearing a strange giant jumper suit and just gonna ask it who changed her and how.
06:08Were forklifts involved?
06:10But she appears to be in some kind of box that has the same technology as the Tower of Terror from Disneyland.
06:14And as the door opens, she's allowed to enter the massive room,
06:17where she finds no signs of intelligent life anywhere, and only a chair and a desk.
06:20As well as a tiny chair for unexplained reasons.
06:23But she hears some rumbling around and tries to investigate,
06:25but she's met with a tube of absolutely delectable matter placed right in front of her.
06:28And when she hears some scuttling around, she finds this little prick,
06:31and she has a pretty fair and justified reaction to seeing a cockroach with giant eyes and the ability to talk.
06:35And after slipping on something, she finds another friend, a blob of gelatinous goo,
06:39with one beating eye, but it's all okay because he's voiced by Dorkly Kong.
06:43And finally, she meets face-to-face with Mr. Fishman, voiced by Lego Batman.
06:48Who tries hitting on her, I guess, and then breaks his back.
06:57Ow!
06:58And as the three little life forms converge, Bob is shocked they're in the presence of a female.
07:02No way, it's a boy. Look at his boobies.
07:05We need to have a talk.
07:07And they ask Susan what her monster name is.
07:09Get out! Here comes!
07:11I am Iron Man.
07:15And as she watches the gang all eat supper, she tries to convince herself that it's all just a bad dream.
07:19That is until she backs into Insectosaurus.
07:21Don't scare Insectosaurus! He's gonna pee himself! Then we'll all be in trouble!
07:26And as Susan absolutely loses it and begs to be let out, the door opens and she sees two glowing, beating red eyes.
07:31Yo, that shit look like Ravenpool Fortnite skin.
07:34Ah, excuse me. I had to drink some more.
07:37We do this everywhere we go.
07:40I think, you know, when we pull up green lights I show-
07:43But it's simply revealed to be none other than the best character in the movie, General W.R. Monger, voiced by Snake in Metal Gear Solid 5.
07:50I know literally nothing about Metal Gear, in fact, I'd argue that Snake is voiced by General W.R. Monger.
07:54And he tells the monsters to get back in their cells,
07:56Get! Get! Get out there! Get em!
07:58And Susan's just relieved to have found another human being.
08:00You're a cyborg!
08:01Madam, I assure you, I am not a cyborg!
08:04Buzz, ketchup, pickle cheese!
08:05But he opens the door and starts this Willy Wonka-ass tour of the facility,
08:08explaining how the government convinced the world that monsters are nothing more than myths.
08:11Yeah, okay, Obama.
08:13While in reality, the government did what it does best and covered the whole thing up,
08:16creating a facility in order to conserve monsterkind.
08:19Okay, but they could've just made a goddamn hotel.
08:24Jonathan, why are you trying to bang my daughter? Blah, blah, blah!
08:28You're not welcome in the husband hotel anymore, Davey!
08:32And we get to see the boys' daily lives withheld in their cells.
08:35And we get this heart-wrenching moment where she sees her own cell.
08:37They wanna go home.
08:39Oh, come on, little Debbie, please don't cry, it makes my knees hurt.
08:42As she gets locked away, he informs her that her new name is Ginormica.
08:46Remember that, it'll be on the McDonald's toy.
08:48Monsters!
08:50Aliens!
08:51McDonald's!
08:52But Ginormica got a My Little Pony toy instead of a Vacu-Gon toy,
08:57so she sits there and cries herself to sleep.
08:59Both toy, and it turns out I want the, uh, I want Pinkie Pie and Rainbow Dash.
09:04And we cut to space once more with this huge-ass mothership,
09:06where a wriggly-ass Squidward-looking MF gets awakened from his Darth Vader tube.
09:09He needs to get lost, Squidward!
09:11Squidward is a character from SpongeBob's-
09:12And he's told by his computer that a Quantonium meteorite has been located on Earth,
09:16so he sends out a robotic probe droid in order to go and retrieve it.
09:19Ho-Ho-Ho-Ho-Ho-Ho-Ho-Ho-Ho-Ho-Ho-Ho-Ho-Ho-Ho-Ho-Ho-Ho-Ho-Ho-Ho-Ho-Ho-Ho-Ho-Ho!
09:20Oh, uh, that's- that's Monsters vs. Aliens villain using AI.
09:29I-I don't know how I feel about this.
09:32But then we get the absolutely legendary car scene.
09:34scene like they're not even trying to be subtle or joking or anything they're just actually about
09:38to splurge oh relax cuthbert it's just like dancing but then a giant ass robotic meteor
09:43crashes down scanning a flame-covered peterbilt truck and become but when the wussies decide to
09:48go and check it out the big one breaks his ankle so the female carries it up the crater as they come
09:52face to face with death as we cut to the next day the military is here in full force as well as none
09:57other than the president of the united states of america who is voiced by stephen colbert penny
10:01peabody dad man and he says he's gonna go out there and face it alone walking up these comically
10:05large stairs with no rail like i love this shot so much and like there's just a guy like three
10:09fourths of the way up with water for some reason but absolutely nothing can hold a candle for what
10:14you are about to witness quite possibly the greatest animation to ever be produced steamboat willie
10:21becomes culturally irrelevant when this scene begins as the commander-in-chief starts absolutely
10:26breaking it down on a keyboard manifesting the greatest possible first contact to an alien
10:31life form humanity could ever provide it's so good even the secret service starts breaking it down
10:36and once the song comes to its thrilling conclusion the alien life form reaches out its hand and history
10:40between man and cromuon is about to be achieved that is until it starts to kick his ass as the robot
10:46transforms into the leader of the decepticons as it plants his big ass wally hands into the ground and it
10:51rises from the ashes and forces the president into a sonic adventure as escape barely being grabbed by the
10:56secret service as he tells the military to have at it but it's a completely worthless attempt to
11:00stop the beast as baraki gets loaded up into the chopper evidently they eat lead i'm brave i'm a brave
11:09president get to this lovely man who's creating down a hallway only stopping to scan every orifice of
11:14himself to get into this door gaining entry to central command how many times did biden have to do
11:18this in his presidency i'm hungry hey boy give me some chicken nuggets we see a roundtable of our
11:23government's greatest heads as they ask the hard-hitting questions sir it's a dire times like
11:27this when i stop and ask myself what would oprah do that button launches all of our nuclear missiles
11:33well then which button gets me a latte that would be the other one sir but when all hope seems lost
11:38our hero enters the chat and as he walks in he's pulling up his pants that's that's a good detail i
11:43approve but as our star-spangled hero drops in with his parachute he tells mr president what they
11:47really need we need raw power we need monsters and general wr monger explains to the president and
11:55his team that his top-secret facility has been holding monsters for over 50 years starting with
11:59insectosaurus miss ronson please the missing link dr cockroach phd we call this thing bob
12:12and finally ginormica and the general says that they should use the monsters they have locked up
12:22in a pokemon battle against the alien robot this plot would later be stolen and used for suicide squad
12:27that's not true that's a lie she's lying to you and these fuckers still want the david ayer cut but
12:33cut back to our monsters in their big holding cell where dr cockroach is trying to use a light bright and
12:38some random junk to turn susan back to normal but shockingly it doesn't work and susan remains on
12:42deviantart and lig reminds her that nobody's ever getting out of this prison and bob's like nah the
12:46invisible man did remember and we get this amazing comeback he died of a heart attack 25 years ago
12:52in that very chair he's still there and just as all hope seems lost general wr monger comes in and
13:00tells the monsters that they're getting out explaining to them that as long as they fight and defeat the
13:04giant alien robot they'll be granted their freedom so they all hop on this ludicrous
13:07giant plane and hop to it flying past the golden gate bridge and seeing all of its inhabitants
13:11evacuating as well as the building that tom and maddie get yeeted off of ultimately landing and
13:16feeling that fresh breeze it's a little hotter than i remember has the earth gotten warmer that'd
13:20be great to know that that'd be a very convenient truth but when they see an incoming death machine
13:24on the horizon susan starts having a panic attack and realizes that the robot's about 80 stories
13:28taller than she thought it would be but fortunately link is on the case and they tell susan to go hide
13:32away in the city while the three boys crack that egghead wide open but then they realize oh shit it's got
13:37arms and it's heading right towards them as it steps on bob fulfilling his wildest dan schneider
13:43fantasy see it's funny because neither of them have brains and as the other two split up dr
13:47cockroach looks at a cable car with absolute glee and we cut to the abandoned city and insert
13:51covid joke here as susan's waltzing around and she decides to vacuum up a car like sandy but she
13:55doesn't have time as the robot spots her and singles her out due to her quantonia makeup chasing
13:59her throughout the city in a scene that i absolutely adore it's such a simple idea but it makes for
14:03such creative and fun action i like the scaling here with the buildings and it basically just
14:07makes a giant maze for susan but susan sees a car and gets a wonderful idea to use them as roller
14:12skates which again is just awesome so awesome that they made a render of her with the car shoes and
14:16it's funny they thought this was gonna be huge and as susan escapes from the city we cut to link below
14:20who's swimming like his hero killer croc against suicide squad what do we have here and as cockroach
14:25soars through the streets grabbing link he tells them exact instructions on how to get inside the
14:29robot and beat it yeah but then bob fucks everything up that's a susan who's made her way over to the
14:36golden gate bridge just barely missing cars and almost ending 44 lives however she does cause one
14:41pile up and it's the worst time because robot comes near and as she tells everyone to get off the bridge
14:45the robot sticks its dirty paws onto the golden gate but thankfully our hero sonic was here but as
14:50susan's about to be ground up into freshly cut baloney insectosaurus my goat here nostril sprays the robot
14:55and blinds it like the big fat guy from house md i forgot to mention but dr cockroach is played by
15:02house md that's really funny as our other heroes arrive on the scene witnessing susan getting
15:06clamped down by the giant robot but because she's a strong independent woman she has the ability to
15:11fight back you're doing great i'm doing everything then link tries the master sword and it fails
15:16spectacularly feeling it resulting in dr cockroach climbing up on susan entering the jaws of the beast
15:21and also failing spectacularly well kind of because he got in to the thing but he also messed it up and
15:27now there's a giant ray of light that's making insectosaurus not do nothing and as susan here is
15:31literally doing everything she tells bob to get all the people off the bridge so he starts boring all
15:35the dividers allowing everybody to escape but as susan realizes that everybody's down she has to think
15:40fast so she yanks on the suspension cables and knocks the robot out of orbit freeing insectosaurus and
15:44knocking the robot down grabbing her friends on the way as the robot gets decapitated resulting in about
15:49eighty dollars of property damage leaving the mayor to give squidward community service for the
15:53damage he caused but the day is saved and the monsters have earned their freedoms however my boy
15:58galaxar over here is pretty salty and he makes a plan to retrieve the quantonium personally that means
16:03his ass is coming to earth i'm recording this right now i didn't know this i'm bud he's voiced by
16:09ryan wilson office man this is good day but we get this scene where the heroes are given a ride back
16:13home and susan says that she was absolutely amazing okay let's not sniff your giant farts too much but she also
16:18says that she can't wait to go home to derrick and link asks a fair question uh how's that gonna
16:22work considering you'd smoosh him and then and then she comes back with this derrick won't rest
16:27until we found a cure for my condition well what the hell is derrick gonna do he ain't no scientist
16:34he ain't got no quantonium theory in order to cure your ass bro is a weatherman and he can't even get
16:40that right he said there was a five percent chance of light showers last tuesday it was fucking hell but
16:44nonetheless they get dropped off at derrick headquarters and she tells the boys to follow
16:48her lead as she accidentally steps on a fence so they tear that bitch to shreds but then mama and
16:52dad come out to greet the big birthday girl and bob assumes that miss susan is derrick and holds her
16:57dearly honey are you all right i taste ham and she finds out that derrick's still at work so she's
17:04gonna go and find him believes all her bestest friends over at mount susan so they do the only thing
17:08that seems responsible in this instance let's party and as it gets into full swing we see that they
17:14brought insectosaurus what the hell is he gonna do here but meanwhile bob is trying his best game
17:18on a very lovely and lucky lady and susan's family is hiding until dr cockroach tries to offer them
17:23beer at 16 causing a panic and everybody running for their lives exactly what happens when you tell a
17:28disney star wars fan that their media intake is dog shit cut to derrick on his beautiful job as he
17:33tells the weather forecast of reno nevada crazy how the best city in the world and the worst city in
17:37the world are only a state away but after he signs off a giant female hand comes bursting through the
17:42window grabbing derrick and bonking him on the head and as susan holds derrick tight she kisses
17:46them with her giant lips just like the senior pillow video but she also crushed his ribcage and
17:54he can't breathe and she says to derrick that they can be together forever now in my little pony
17:58equestria world and derrick says he just can't see how they're gonna make this work and he says that
18:02he has an audience that depends on him to make videos going around and shaming people for not putting
18:06away shopping carts why i'm not on the ground at all leave me alone and that he can't just put all
18:11that on hold to revert susan back to normal i mean again i don't know what the hell they're gonna do
18:16what do you what do you think will happen i mean derrick kind of spitting i'm gonna be honest but i'm
18:20not looking to get married and spend the rest of my life in someone else's shadow and you're casting
18:26a pretty big shadow oh he went there oh so as susan walks away and heads out of modesto sitting here
18:33at lubes diesel and gas to camp out for the night all the other monsters show up after having the
18:37best shindig of their lives but they're all sad as they say how no matter what you do the normal
18:41people of the world are going to only view them as disgusting gross putrid awful horrendous foul
18:46evil monsters who suck and susan starts ranting about derrick's a selfish jerk and for some reason
18:51this involves kicking bob into the stratosphere and she tells all the monsters that they're amazing
18:56and should not be demeaned amazing and as they're all having a wonderful moment a beam of light
19:01comes to abduct susan lifting her off the ground into the mothership but then insecto grabs onto
19:06her with a snot rod leading to galaxar using the motherfucking eclipse cannon to live at
19:10her but it nails insectosaurus leaving him down and out as susan is transported into the great
19:15battleground in the sky and as link comforts insectosaurus we fade out into his inevitable
19:19death and then susan wakes up in galaxar's ship and she's like who changed her again but she sees a
19:25fleet of shadow androids dressed up to look like the robots from the golden gate bridge only for this
19:29random thing to come and imprison her as galaxar comes face to face with susan informing her that
19:34she has stolen what was rightfully his and that he's going to extract the quantonium straight through
19:38her that force field is impenet what the flag not but susan breaks out of the damn force field and
19:46guns it for our boy bashing through all these doors and booking it for our floating flag nar as
19:50she chases them through this tunnel and he lands in a strange room and as susan's just about to get
19:54the killing blow he traps her in this tube beginning the extraction process and susan oh wait oh my okay
19:59the movie rental period just ran out as i was writing the script okay now on to my totally legal way of
20:04watching this movie susan's power is drained as she's turned to exact modesto size and she's now
20:09at the will of galaxar who tells her that he's going to use the quantonium to rebuild his planet's
20:13civilization i'm sorry your planet was destroyed oh don't be i'm the one who destroyed it but as he
20:19starts up his cloning machine he starts scanning for his life essence while explaining his tragic
20:23backstory so i went on the road with a giant but i've told you too much already and the cloning
20:31process begins with a bajillion naked galaxars 3d printed as the news reports on yet another alien
20:36invasion with galaxars sending out a message from the space colony arc and i'm just gonna say it would
20:41be really funny if it was about urine time to take a pig the black doom tells the humans they have
20:49nothing to fear and that he means them no harm i have come in peace however it is important to note
20:54that most of you will not survive the next one four hours just to recap i come in peace and you no harm
21:01and you are oh shit but cut to the monsters who are still mourning the loss of insectosaurus as they
21:06all cry over the big old grub but they call in general wr monger once more in order to get them up
21:10to the susan ship in order to start a breakout and the general says that if he doesn't come back to save
21:14them he's either dead or late and as our heroes jump out the plane that they're in gets hit with
21:19a johnny quasar beam but everything's okay because general wr monger never isn't wearing a parachute
21:24you can let go of me now lieutenant look up back to the ship and we see bob cockroach and link making
21:31their way in as susan's taken to the inferno room to be executed and i mean like come on it's just the
21:36austin powers moment they could get away no no no i'm going to leave them alone and not actually
21:41witness them dying i'm just gonna assume it all went to plan what scott you just don't get it do
21:48you and as bob and the gang watch he gets an idea of how to slip through central command and as susan's
21:52being taken down the hallway our boys intercept and he just assumes that links a defective clone but the
21:57others are in this scene where he just like gives them everything that they could possibly need and
22:01here's a security pass just in case would you like a gun hey guys look and dr cockroach gets an idea
22:08to just simply blow up the whole damn ship and while cockroach grabs the gun from bob he
22:12accidentally takes down a galaxar and as galaxar instructs all the other galaxars to go fight the
22:16galaxar fake as args resulting in this awesome fight scene where i mean like they don't really
22:20fight it's just they just kind of exist like majority of things in this scene aren't actually
22:24intentional but they're really funny this is a certified monsters versus alien fight scene
22:30go run it run it run it till we're running out but as more galaxars are birthed they surround our
22:36boys as bob turns into a grappling hook allowing everybody to get to the power core but ultimately
22:40finding a ddr pad is the control system which would later be shamelessly stolen by sony with
22:45claddy with a chance of meatballs 2 it doesn't matter though because dr cockroach is absolutely goaded
22:52like american dad kid but he's got to hurry up because the horde of galaxars are crawling all over the
22:56goddamn core as cockroach breaks it down and breaks through all the security systems initiating a
23:00self-destruct sequence in six minutes oh baseballs well i i i understood that reference yes
23:11and as all the galaxars try to escape they're all going through this big door to which the monsters
23:15have to go through or else they'll be blown to smithereens so link grabs this thing and rushes
23:19towards the door but only susan ends up making it through locking the other three in and sealing
23:23their fate it'd be kind of weird if like like just like one of them got through as well like it's
23:27just like two and two like it wasn't just susan like like what if link got through but the others
23:31tell her to go and live her life and forget about them but instead of dipping she walks right in and
23:36has a plan grabbing these hovers skate things and using them like the cars from earlier and as susan
23:39plays cartoon network's hole in the wall she makes it to the main chamber as the robots are instructed
23:43to take her out to applebee's do you want onion rings
23:46no so she dodges and weaves all around nearly escaping certain doom and as she heads outside
23:54she's targeted by the eclipse cannon which she dodges and whacks galaxar in the face with a hover
23:58shoot thing no and as she's about ready to kick his in she hears that the quantonium has been
24:06diverted into this ender pearl thing in the escape capsule it's now prepared and as galaxar is about
24:10to head out she grabs him and starts a tussle pulling him to the ground punching him in the face grabbing
24:14his gun and she's informed that there's literally no way to open the door since you put the ship on
24:18self-destruct and he says that now we're all gonna die susan and she replies with the hardest line
24:24in history i wouldn't be so sure and the name is ginormica that was the only one i had no biggie
24:37as the boys are reminiscing about their lives link and doc say it's been an honor knowing each other as
24:41they all know they're absolutely screwed because the rocket doesn't know how to heal i'll see you
24:45guys tomorrow for lunch that's right bob but as they see their grand demise ginormica's back in
24:51action bitches what the hell did he just say and as susan grabs all the team while bursting out of
25:00the ship grabbing hold of the edge when it comes crashing down as they all wonder where the hell
25:03killmonger is that's the only way he wouldn't be there as if he was dead
25:07or late he pops up in an all new and improved butterfly insectosaurus saving them all from
25:14impending doom and we get this moment that i like it's really funny one nothing happened maybe my
25:20count and all of susan's family come down to give free cheers as insectosaurus and his beautiful face
25:25bring our heroes to safety and as link gets smothered susan meets back up with her parents and most
25:30importantly derek is on the scene who says that he'll forgive susan for what she did to him i mean it
25:34wasn't her fault that she got hit by a meteorite and turned into a steven universe giant woman and
25:38he got a call from a new york news station that'll give him his big break if he can just get an
25:42exclusive interview with susan and she makes sure that the camera's rolling when she punts derek
25:46into the air asking bob to so kindly catch him to which he finally gets his one-on-one with derek
25:51telling him that he's found his true love and we get the ending to the build-up that's been going on
25:55since the first frame of this movie everything this entire film this video it's all been leading to this
25:59one shot this one majestic shot cut we're done here it's over and as monger congratulate
26:04the team he tells them that their job isn't over yet as a snail has fallen into a french nuclear
26:08reactor and that s car gat you on is slowly making its way to paris also that mr beast can buy the
26:14eiffel tower over 900 feet in the air oh man chris tyson doesn't like going more than 18 feet in the
26:20air and as they all fly away on butterfly-a-saurus bob finds out that susan was dating derek too
26:25you're kidding me that slimy rat good time for a cup of joe hit me with a double venti organic
26:31chocolate you know make sure it's got no more than four ounces of milk the beans won't have
26:34the right texture black it is let's check on the situation in 500 years who wants to freeze my head
26:47and there you go there's monsters versus aliens man what an oddity this was like comparing this
26:52to other dreamworks films it's such a strange vibe like starting out with the characters i mean one of
26:57them is just a giant human girl put with this guy's fetish aside i mean it's a pretty simple concept
27:01nothing crazy like an anthropomorphic panda learning martial arts or a boob but that's kind of the
27:06point actually since all these characters are supposed to be parodies and knockoffs of classic
27:09horror and sci-fi movies like susan is canonically 49 feet and 11 inches tall instead of 50 to be kind
27:15of a spoof on attack of the 50 foot woman dr cockroach is the fly link is the creature from the black
27:19lagoon etc etc and they really make the most of these concepts in the film like susan herself with some
27:24pretty nice protagonist all things considered she has a very standard goal of just not wanting to
27:28be as tall as your standard eighth grader and her dynamic with the other monsters is really nice
27:31where it takes the average human being locked up with a room with these guys for weeks on end to
27:35put her differences aside and realize that they're pretty nice guys in reality and speaking of the
27:39other three of them are just such a good dynamic i don't know if it was intentional but i love how
27:42they just kind of represent three levels of intelligence dr cockroach is a mad scientist links
27:47are pretty standard dude who has an ego but he's not too smart and not too dumb and bob's just a
27:50idiot i mean yeah bob let's talk about bob for a moment it makes sense he's basically the mascot of
27:55this franchise he's the comic relief and he's a damn good one like bob just screws everything
27:59up and puts the team in peril but you can't hate him for it he's got such good intentions he's trying
28:04his damn best and then we got my boy general wr monger like come on you don't get better characters
28:10than general wr monger for monsters versus aliens 2009 dreamworks movies he's every stereotype of a
28:17hardened war veteran and it's just the greatest thing ever like they don't tell you it in the
28:21movie but he's canonically 90 years old yet he's still willing to jump out of an airplane at a
28:26moment's notice there's no issues with this character he is perfectly written plus he has a
28:31little shrek pin on his uniform at all times fun fact and then there's also the president who shows
28:34up less than i remember as a kid but he absolutely steals the show he's such an absolute moron but he has
28:39so much power it's so good like bro could just nuke china at any given tuesday it's amazing plus it
28:44allows me to look at stephen colbert is actually funny it's crazy speaking of though i love how the
28:48film represents the american government like they could have made some obvious jokes of like well
28:52why don't we just use the lasers we have in antarctica or like why don't we just call the
28:56shadow government they'll know what to do which would have been funny sure but instead of going
28:59that route they just made the government a bunch of bumbling idiots it's such a simple concept but
29:04done so perfectly it's like the complete opposite of something like the bay former movies where if a
29:08film like that is going to glorify the military this one just flat out parodies it i love it so much
29:13and by the way i just wanted to bring up the fact that the film wasn't always going to be like this
29:16it was originally going to be an adaptation of the comic rex havoc dating all the way back to 2002
29:21it was going to be much more horror based with crazier designs where the heroes were going to fight
29:25an alien queen for disrupting cable tv on earth like look at dr cockroach here my man is buggin but
29:31they realized that it probably would have caused at least five children to lock themselves in their
29:35rooms out of fear so they basically just restarted the whole thing from scratch with the same loose
29:38concept making it much more dreamworks i guess also adding derrick moving on to the financial
29:44department though out of all the dreamworks films i've talked about this one had easily the highest
29:47budget where something like rise of the guardians had 145 million and mr peabody having 147 this film's
29:53budget was 175 million dollars grossing a total of 381 million worldwide which honestly is not too bad
30:00like i'm sure with dvd sales and all that they didn't lose money on this one but only a few months
30:04after this movie came out they confirmed they would not be making a sequel and they just kind of
30:08never really said why dreamworks wasn't really doing the absolute best around this point and they
30:13weren't even in their 2010s flop era yet so when asked at an investor briefing in 2009 about getting
30:17the film a sequel jeffrey katzenberg had this to say i'd like to tell you there's a perfectly rational
30:22clear and easy answer as to why not but there isn't the does that mean i want bob back what is this
30:27article i just found what could this possibly mean is this what is this hey clarence what'd you bring for
30:32show and tell i just found a great commercial this is a commercial where they go to see monsters
30:40versus aliens in 3d then the little girl just like picks picks bob link and cockroach out of the
30:47screen and takes them home what the fuck is going on don't cry little monster uncle monger's got enough
30:54carrot puree to feed you your entire life boy's hungry however bob fans were in luck as if you
31:02were a real one you remember that bob did come back with 1 28th of the budget being in none other
31:06than the monsters versus aliens tv show premiering on nickelodeon nationwide in march 2013 following
31:12this series that were made for both kung fu panda and the penguins of madagascar and by the way the
31:16penguins of madagascar one was utter bullshit like there is no place in the timeline where this makes
31:21any possible sense this has to be an au like all the penguins are here at the zoo and like none of the
31:27the main four animals are but king julian is how the hell did he get to the zoo why is he here
31:35but the show follows our main heroes about six months after the events of the film just living
31:39their daily lives at area 50 something then going on wacky misadventures blah blah blah and obviously
31:44none of the original cast returned like susan's now voiced by poison ivy from the lego batman movie i
31:49don't know if this is a net positive or negative but there's all kinds of new characters joining the
31:52fray like for example squeep who's this little alien child who came to earth to learn about it
31:57for a school field trip assignment and it's a field trip to last the whole goddamn season i guess
32:01and then there's coverton who's literally just squealium fancy son i mean look at it it's just him
32:07and he's just an evil prick alien who's always up to no good plotting against our monster heroes and
32:11trying to end the world or whatever and they now live in area 50 something or whatever for whatever
32:15reason and they work with all the monsters and take down world ending threats and as well as whatever
32:19sitcom problems they're gonna have that week and it's overall pretty good dynamic all things
32:23considered coverton's just an egotistical asshole who hates everything just like squealium fancy son
32:28it's him and little squeeby boy is super smart yet naive and super easily manipulated there's other
32:32characters too like this warrior yellow woman and her space dog thing i'll be real i just don't give a
32:38crap i mean besides that though the animation is okay i mean it could definitely look a lot worse but i
32:44think pretty much every character looks fine and like they did in the movie just on a lower budget of
32:49course except for susan i don't know why she looks so like weird and flat like her hair looks like a
32:54giant eraser that's been cut up and glued to her head it's so very strange and yeah speaking of susan
32:59the first episode they make it so she can just turn giant on command like she just solved her entire
33:04like most pressing matter from the movie like this instantly undoes like her entire character arc of
33:09accepting who she was but i was the kind of kid who wanted everything for my characters in media to be
33:14sunshine and rainbows so i was so happy seeing this but i picked out a random episode to watch and review for
33:19you guys right now so let's just do it so there's a meeting with the main cast they need to find a
33:23way to get to the battlefields quicker in order to stop mass destruction and scribblebibble makes a
33:27remarkable concept for a teleportation whatever the hell thingy and dr cockroach hates him so he's
33:31like i can do it better and then general w ronger is like okay go do your thing and i'll like yours
33:35better and then uh oh the thing actually doesn't exist and he was just bluffing so the game make a
33:39teleportation device out of random junk they have laying around and it ultimately proves to be a success but it
33:44can only go about 20 feet also it's lactose intolerant it doesn't like cheese because i had
33:50that insect on me and then i flicked it off and so i couldn't have kids after that you mean vasectomy
33:56moya you know i know my plan so when the whole gang seems lost link comes up with a plan and as we
34:01cut to a demonstration of the machine link goes through tricking everybody into thinking he went
34:04to belgium but in reality he just goes to the gas station across the street and grabs some waffles and
34:09he says they're authentic belgian waffles this is good this is a good bit but then dimbo and cromulon
34:14are like okay this is bs so they try messing with them assuming it has to be a lactose intolerant
34:18portal and they're like why don't you go to wisconsin and get some cheese so bro gets cheese and it
34:23makes everything start burping and farting and all that weird crap and then a bunch of like weird spiral
34:27light thingies from death egg zone come out taking all the workers for the spin as dr cockroach has to
34:32save the earth or whatever and he tells susan to grow giant when she gets nailed with a boot and then okay
34:36what the hell okay you guys need to stop wait just a minute bob is voiced by chad clarence go team
34:42monster chad chad oh i hear clarence where the hell is susan's outfit red on the vtech box i am
34:52living i think that's basically the end of our little adventure through the world of monsters and
34:56aliens and stuff i guess thank you all very much for watching and like i've been saying the scarlet plush
35:00is still available once we hit 70 sales it'll go into full production we're slowly climbing up there
35:04but we don't have any sort of time frame so we're all good anyone who bought them will be getting
35:08them eventually we just got to hit the 70 threshold but anybody who wants to pick one up i deeply
35:12appreciate it not really sure what i'm going to talk about next i might just let the wind guide me
35:16current options are like uh or like gnomeo and juliet and like uh i don't know sherlock gnomes but without
35:26any further ado subscribe right now or i'm going to ruin your wedding with the shadow of the hedgehog
35:29meteor from spider-man 3
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