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Jimmy Rees announces new national tour
The Canberra Times
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7 months ago
The comedian will be in Canberra later this year
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đź—ž
News
Transcript
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00:00
Jason, pack it up! We're doing a live show!
00:03
What? Okay. Well, where are you going?
00:05
Well, look up the stats, Jason, you idiot!
00:07
Oh, yes, of course. Okay, well, 60% of your audience is in Australia, so...
00:11
The Maldives!
00:12
No, I don't see any of... no.
00:14
Hawaii!
00:15
Hawaii? No, no, no. You're just naming places you want to go.
00:18
No, I am not, Jason. Fiji!
00:20
That's not what the stats know!
00:22
Isn't that what a tour is, Jason? Going to the places that you watch?
00:26
No, sir. You have to put on a show.
00:27
Oh, that means you have to come, Jason.
00:29
Oh, yeah, but we can't just do this the whole time.
00:32
We have to bring some other people, and you have to tell people where you're going.
00:35
Fine, we're going to Hobart, Adelaide, Melbourne, Brisbane, the Gold Coast, Perth, and Eastern Sydney.
00:42
Eastern Sydney? Eastern Sydney? What, the Pacific Ocean?
00:45
Auckland, you idiot!
00:47
Sure, okay, who's coming?
00:49
Elon Musk.
00:50
Huh?
00:51
So cool.
00:52
I'm going to come to Adelaide and visit my battery.
00:54
Annoying lady!
00:55
Hi!
00:56
This is quaint.
00:59
Oh, we all know one of them.
01:00
Oh, Donald Trump.
01:02
I'm coming to the capital of Australia.
01:05
Sydney.
01:06
Sydney!
01:07
My nephew, Caleb.
01:08
Oh, sick!
01:10
Where we going?
01:11
Affluent ladies.
01:13
Oh, darling, I can't wait.
01:16
Where do we start? Somewhere bougie?
01:17
Who that?
01:18
Who?
01:19
Generic bogan person.
01:21
How's he going?
01:22
Does he just want to speak about politics or something?
01:24
Hang on, this guy just does anything I say.
01:27
A door.
01:32
The PM.
01:33
I'm the Prime Minister of Australia.
01:35
Is Donald Trump still here?
01:37
A shoe.
01:39
What?
01:40
Rafael Nadal.
01:41
I have retired so I will not be coming back to Melbourne.
01:43
It's a very sad day.
01:44
I will not be coming.
01:45
Ah!
01:46
The spirit of Tasmania.
01:48
The sand people.
01:51
And every country town in Australia right now in the comments.
01:57
Did you hear he did a regional tour last year?
01:59
It's not enough though.
02:00
What about our small town with 300 people and no theatre?
02:05
Okay, shoot, that's enough.
02:07
Sir, what's in the show?
02:09
Jason!
02:10
What are you stupid?
02:11
We sell all the tickets first.
02:12
No one does that.
02:14
Sure, no one does that.
02:16
They get the show ready first and then they...
02:21
Done they?
02:25
Jason, get me a drink.
02:26
I've got a drink.
02:27
Okay.
02:28
Ooh and Jason, just make it one night only.
02:30
That's all I could bear.
02:32
Particularly in Perth.
02:33
One night?
02:34
Okay, bye.
02:35
I don't know what's going in it.
02:36
This is embarrassing.
02:37
No one's gonna come to this.
02:38
Remember?
02:39
No one's gonna come to this.
02:40
Remember?
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