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00:00Jess.
00:01Something has shifted with you.
00:03Ah!
00:04Jess?
00:05Hi.
00:06How are ya?
00:07Girl, are you good?
00:08You're unhappy.
00:09Leaving me is the worst thing that anyone's ever done!
00:13Change your life.
00:14Go to London.
00:15Seriously?
00:16You love London.
00:17You saw Spice World nine times in the theater.
00:21I could do it.
00:22I could go and find my English dream.
00:24You know, a stakegrounds, Ferdinand Gardens.
00:27Ah!
00:28Good luck with that, love.
00:29Oh shit!
00:30You fuck!
00:31I'm free!
00:32Oh my god, I'm in hell.
00:40You're the singing guy.
00:41I'm Felix, by the way.
00:42You've got like an American accent, right?
00:44Let me guess, you're like one of those Love Actually girls.
00:48This is the London I came here for.
00:50It's like out of a movie.
00:51Yeah, a horror movie.
00:52These people are full of pent up rage and dark secrets.
00:55I know, but look, it's a yellow house.
00:57How come every time you go around my life?
01:00You're not charmed by me?
01:01I don't know if I'm getting like 50 UTIs a year or it's like one long UTI.
01:05That is a really needy question.
01:07Why?
01:08Why?
01:09You want a scone guvner?
01:10Yeah, right.
01:11So that is the most annoying genre of American humor.
01:17I came here to find myself.
01:19A lot of stuff went down in New York.
01:20My ex-boyfriend is living with another woman right now.
01:23Oh my god!
01:24Do you want me to murder them?
01:25Yeah.
01:26I want you to cut their heads off and sew them back on.
01:31Is he who he says he is?
01:33This has all just been a series of red flags.
01:36You think you're so special.
01:37I get that it's hard for you, but like it's hard for fucking everyone, okay?
01:41I wanted to be in bed with like Hugh Grant from the British Jones Diaries.
01:45Did you say British Jones Diaries?
01:47Yeah, there's four of them.
01:48Yeah, it's not called British Jones.
01:49She's British!
01:54You are cracking my heart open with that brave ability to love.
01:59Yes, that's the same thing.
02:01I have a very chaotic mind.
02:03Maybe I choose chaos.
02:05Oh my god!
02:10If you roast yourself up a little, you can make it with him.
02:13Why don't you hook up with him?
02:15Why don't you go suck him off?
02:16See if you can get him to come.
02:17Any day.
02:18Ew!
02:19So you'll ride it.
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