- 26/05/2025
Sarah Jane Smith and the gang open the Alien Files - the ultimate guide to everything you could possibly need to know when facing hostile aliens.
Clyde has the lowdown on the all-controlling Berserkers and the alien truth behind the world's most famous painting - the Mona Lisa.
Clyde has the lowdown on the all-controlling Berserkers and the alien truth behind the world's most famous painting - the Mona Lisa.
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ЁЯУ║
TVTranscript
00:00This week starts Monday at 5 on CBBC and CBBC HD.
00:14My name is Sarah Jane Smith and I defend the world from aliens.
00:18These are my alien files.
00:20The collected information gathered by me and the rest of the Bannerman Road gang
00:25about extraterrestrials that have threatened our planet and might do so again.
00:31The universe is amazing and don't be fooled by what some people might tell you.
00:37It's full of strange and wonderful life.
00:39I've met so much of it out there among the stars and here on Earth,
00:43but not all of it is friendly.
00:46Pay attention because one day Earth might be depending on you.
00:52Entering Sarah Jane's alien files this time are the all-controlling Berserkers
01:01plus the alien truth behind the world's most famous painting, the Mona Lisa.
01:13OK, Mr S, keep still for a few minutes longer.
01:16Maintaining visual output stasis is more operationally draining than you might imagine, Clyde.
01:22I would appreciate a swift move to more pressing matters as agreed.
01:26After all, I was not designed to be an artist's muse.
01:29You can say that again.
01:31It does not matter because the Picasso of Bannerman Road is finished.
01:38Have I got you?
01:39Yes, Clyde.
01:40Clyde, you do exhibit a talent for manual image creation that would become especially useful
01:45if the camera were ever to be uninvented.
01:48OK, Mr S, deal's a deal.
01:52You sat for me, now you get to pick my alien whooping brain.
01:56Clyde is guide to alien behaviour and what not for Sarah Jane's alien files.
02:00Information upload to the alien files commencing in three, two, one.
02:11Might I suggest, if the memory of events are not too painful,
02:15that you focus first on the time your father reappeared in your life
02:19and the alien warrior technology that took control of him.
02:22The Berserker.
02:24If ever there was a day I wouldn't want to live again, it was that one.
02:30It started with a ring at the door.
02:41Hello, son.
02:43Dad?
02:44I think you can safely say that was totally, definitely and absolutely
02:48the last thing I was expecting to happen.
02:51Nice place.
02:53What do you want, Dad?
02:54I had some business over here. Thought I'd pay you a visit.
02:57That's all right, isn't it?
02:58It's been five years.
03:00I detect that your father's return provoked in you a complicated emotional response.
03:05You're telling me.
03:07You're telling me.
03:09He let me down before, my dad, but that didn't stop me wanting to impress him
03:12as soon as he turned up again.
03:14Big mistake.
03:20I knew that Sarah Jane would go ballistic if she found out,
03:23but I couldn't resist telling Dad what we did and showing him the attic
03:26and the amazing things in it.
03:28Here is the attic.
03:38It's alien. Do you get what that means?
03:41Alien? Yeah, right.
03:43Well, come on, then.
03:45Show me something alien.
03:47Come on, sell it to me.
03:50Well, we have this man who lives in America,
03:54but Sarah Jane has this.
04:00Hey, hey, Maria.
04:02This friend of Sarah Jane's given her this holographic postcard.
04:05What's-it thing, so...
04:07Hi, Maria. We miss you.
04:09Soft boy.
04:11I wanted him to think I was cool,
04:13and I think you'd have to say I succeeded.
04:16See?
04:18Alien tech.
04:20Sarah Jane had laid down strict rules about entering the attic in her absence.
04:24I knew it was against the rules, but this was my dad.
04:27Suddenly everything felt different.
04:30That's Mr Smith.
04:32He's basically this big alien computer.
04:35You say, Mr Smith, and then...
04:37My dad wasn't listening, though.
04:39He was more interested in a pendant that he'd spotted.
04:42Rani had found it at school and, realising it had alien properties,
04:45she'd left it in the attic so you could analyse it, Mr Smith,
04:48when Sarah Jane got back.
04:50Dad, what are you doing?
04:53Just looking.
04:55The artefact your father had taken was, in fact, a berserker pendant.
05:02OK, Mr Smith. Time for that data analysis thing you do.
05:06Berserker pendants are...
05:09Berserker pendants are talismans worn by a Norse tribe
05:13who were actually a warlike alien race.
05:16Use of the pendant affects its wearer both mentally,
05:19by increasing aggression levels,
05:22and physically, producing the berserker symbol on the palm,
05:26and then ever more prominent blue blood veins across the surface of the skin.
05:32The pendant allows its wearer to gain power over the actions of those around them.
05:40To some, the berserkers are alien originators of a warlike Norse tribe,
05:45and use of personality-changing pendants
05:48was fundamental to expanding the armies of these ferocious warriors.
05:53My dad found out how the pendant's powers worked by chance
05:57when Mr Chandra came over to give us a grilling
06:00about what we were doing hanging around Sarah Jane's place.
06:03Can I ask what you're both doing here?
06:05Er...
06:06Oh, come on, mate. It's not that serious. Just drop it, eh?
06:12You want to watch it with the pizza, though? Cholesterol city.
06:15Thank you. I do plenty of exercise, actually.
06:18With all that pizza, too, right? You should exercise, mate.
06:21I should exercise?
06:25Mr Chandra?
06:27Is he...?
06:29He is?
06:31He's doing what I tell him.
06:33Oi, mate. Jogging's for wimps.
06:36Keep doing some push-ups, yeah?
06:43You have to admit, that was kind of fun.
06:45My analysis suggests that this is a scenario devoid of humour.
06:49Mr Chandra's repetitive actions could have resulted in severe injury,
06:53a distinctly non-comic outcome.
06:56Yep, yep, you're right, Mr Smith.
06:58A control-freak headmaster losing power over his own body
07:02and unable to stop himself doing press-ups.
07:04There's... there's nothing funny about that.
07:06I am pleased to know we are in agreement.
07:09But there was definitely nothing funny about what happened next.
07:13Jogging's for wimps. I'm doing press-ups.
07:16I'm doing press-ups.
07:19What's happened?
07:21Have you taken something that doesn't belong to you?
07:23Don't you go round accusing my dad of nicking stuff.
07:26Who do you think you are?
07:27You take your dad up to the attic, he comes back down
07:29and suddenly my dad's doing what your dad tells him to.
07:32Clyde, mate, I really can't be bothered with all this.
07:38Ronnie, perhaps we should go inside and speak to Mr Smith.
07:40Clyde!
07:42Yeah, I'm coming, Dad.
07:43Good.
07:44I'll and Clyde.
07:46Forget about those two.
07:48You see, he's got it.
07:51I want you to forget about them.
07:53Completely.
07:57Clyde?
08:00I'm fine.
08:02Clyde!
08:03Clyde, wait!
08:05Sorry, do I know you?
08:07Luke's like my brother and Ronnie's the most...
08:10Ronnie's great too, but I didn't care about them one bit.
08:14I can remember thinking that.
08:17Now it was Dad and me again, nothing else mattered.
08:21And now he knew the pendant's powers,
08:23my dad didn't waste any time using them.
08:25Good afternoon, sir.
08:27Can I help you?
08:28All right, mate.
08:29We're looking for a motor.
08:30Something flashy, something that'll turn a few girls' heads.
08:33Of course, sir.
08:34Just out of interest, what sort of product would you like?
08:37Of course, sir.
08:38Just out of interest, what sort of price range are we looking at?
08:41Oh, money's not a problem.
08:45We do, of course, offer a number of different payment schemes.
08:47Save the patter, mate. I'm having this one.
08:50It is a bit on the expensive side, sir.
08:53I'm sure it is, but you're going to give it to us for free.
09:00I'm going to give it to you for free.
09:08Yes!
09:11My dad certainly wasn't hanging about.
09:13He wanted control over everything and everyone.
09:18So next, it was off to the shops.
09:24Whatever my dad asked for, he got.
09:26It was amazing.
09:29Loads of cool gear for free.
09:31I knew it wasn't right, but it was impossible not to get swept along.
09:35Even when my dad wiped all memory of my mum.
09:38That's what the pendant does and why it has to go in the alien files.
09:44The scariest thing is, I know there's a lot of me that's just like my dad.
09:48Maybe one day that's how I'll end up.
09:50Human character development is not only a matter of family DNA, Clyde.
09:55The influence of experience and, crucially, of friends are also major factors.
10:01Luckily, my friends who I'd just told to take a running jump were still looking out for me.
10:05Even friends on the other side of the Atlantic.
10:12What is it, Dad?
10:13Your computer is beeping.
10:15With you disabled, Mr Smith, Luke and Rani needed another way to find out what was going on with this pendant.
10:21So they improvised.
10:22Hey, how are you?
10:24By contacting Maria in America.
10:26Well, actually, it was her dad whose help they were really after.
10:31You can hack into any computer, can't you, Mr Jackson?
10:34We need you to get into UNIT, see if they know what this pendant is.
10:37We're sending over a picture now.
10:40It's a drawing of an alien pendant.
10:43Okay, let's do it.
10:49Maria's dad discovered just how dangerous the pendant could be.
10:54Oh, my God.
10:55Dad?
10:56That's the UNIT archives of photo December 1940.
10:59What is it?
11:01It's what happens to you when you use the pendant.
11:05I didn't need any UNIT computers, though.
11:07I was getting a good look at how the Berserker pendant works close up for myself.
11:13Dad and I headed to the docks.
11:15He was after a yacht.
11:16There's nothing stopping us.
11:19We can go anywhere out there.
11:26Dad?
11:27But he'd used the pendant one time too often,
11:30and here he was turning into a Berserker,
11:32and I had no idea how to stop it.
11:34Boat.
11:37I shouldn't have let it get to this.
11:39That's well worth putting in the alien files.
11:41Someone help me, please!
11:43If something's not right, you need to act straight away,
11:45not just go with the flow like I'd been doing.
11:50Luckily, help was at hand.
11:52My mum, Luke and Rani had found us.
11:54Not that I knew who they were.
11:57Dad?
11:59Please, will you help us?
12:00What's happened to me?
12:03Mr. Langer, it's the pendant.
12:04Every time you use it, it overpowers you.
12:07Clyde, get back. It's not safe.
12:11He's my soldier, and you can't stop us,
12:14because if you do, if you try to,
12:17I'll tell you to walk into the water.
12:19I'll destroy you all.
12:21This whole world will do as I say.
12:26Dad, please.
12:28I'm a Berserker, and you will follow my orders.
12:33Oh, I don't think so.
12:39At last, someone I recognised,
12:41not wiped from my memory by my dad.
12:43Stan, what's happening?
12:45These people reckon I should know them, but...
12:48These people reckon I should know them, but...
12:51I don't.
12:53It's the strangest feeling I've felt in my life.
12:56I can remember thinking, who on earth are this lot?
12:59But at the same time, I could tell I knew them somehow.
13:02But then there was this voice telling me that I didn't.
13:06Weird.
13:08But now Sarah Jane was here,
13:10Maria's dad had tracked her down,
13:12and she knew how to turn this raging Berserker back into my dad again.
13:17Look at the mirror. Look at your reflection.
13:20That isn't you.
13:22Just remember what you are.
13:24Remember, before the pendant, no Berserkers, no mind control.
13:29That's not you, Paul.
13:31You need to remember who you are.
13:46No!
14:04That's it.
14:05You're human, just like the rest of us.
14:17Hi, Mum.
14:19Oh, my darling!
14:21So the nightmare was over.
14:23I had my mum and my friends back,
14:25and my dad was back to normal.
14:28And before I knew it,
14:30he was out of my life once more.
14:34I guess me and my dad are never going to be that close.
14:37Nevertheless, my supposition is that he is appreciative of what you did to save him.
14:42And I can't be thinking about him all day.
14:44Not when there's the planet to save.
14:47Indeed, full concentration has been essential
14:50in repelling alien threats as diverse as Kudlap and the Trickster.
14:55Although I note that you always find time in your busy schedule for your art.
15:00Although being a whiz with the old paints can get complicated too.
15:03I assume you are referring to the alien encounter
15:06that was not so much about an invading horde as a priceless work of art.
15:10Yeah.
15:11Who would have thought that the world's most famous painting would have an alien connection?
15:17It was an adventure full of surprises.
15:20And the first was at school,
15:22when Mr Chandra came in with news about an art competition.
15:25Tomorrow morning, this entire class will be the first members of the public to see...
15:32the Mona Lisa, here in the UK.
15:35And all thanks to Clyde.
15:37Bit of a shock, winning the competition.
15:39Well, not the winning bit, just that I hadn't entered it.
15:42I'd never do anything like that, but Luke had done it without telling me.
15:46One of the surprises you humans enjoy so much.
15:50Too right. I was well chuffed.
15:54No way!
15:56Is something wrong?
15:58It's just...
16:00my work in a proper gallery.
16:03And so to the prize!
16:07Prepare to meet...
16:09the Mona Lisa.
16:14So this was exciting.
16:15The most famous painting ever in a private viewing, just for us.
16:19And not an alien in sight.
16:21Or so we thought.
16:24Feast your eyes and lose your hearts.
16:27I give you...
16:30the Mona Lisa!
16:36She has let herself go!
16:41Isn't that his assistant?
16:45Security!
16:46The Mona Lisa has been stolen!
16:49This wasn't just an art theft, it was much weirder than that.
16:52It was like a kidnapping at the same time.
16:56Because the woman in the Mona Lisa's place was Phyllis Trupp,
17:00assistant to the gallery's curator, Lionel.
17:03How on earth had she got in the picture?
17:05And where had the Mona Lisa gone?
17:12We started to investigate.
17:14And my painting threw up another surprise.
17:16Clyde?
17:17Yes, I know my picture would look great in your lounge.
17:20Just get your dad to make me an offer.
17:22I don't want your painting, Clyde.
17:23I want to know what happened to the gun that was in it.
17:26Galaxia's gun?
17:29Whose?
17:31Okay, so I gave them names.
17:33Can we move on now? What matters is...
17:35What are you doing here?
17:37The police are conducting an investigation.
17:40They don't need a bunch of school children roaming around disturbing evidence.
17:44Yeah, well, it isn't just your precious Mona Lisa that's been stolen now, is it?
17:47One of the guns in Clyde's painting has vanished. Look!
17:51It's dry.
17:54The gun wasn't painted out, Mr. Harding. It was taken.
17:57Whatever we're dealing with, it's more than just an art thing.
17:59Oh, you better believe it.
18:02Sugar.
18:03She's got my gun.
18:04Run for it!
18:06The real Mona Lisa shooting at us with a weapon stolen from the gallery.
18:10I can't believe it.
18:12I can't believe it.
18:13I can't believe it.
18:14I can't believe it.
18:15I can't believe it.
18:16I can't believe it.
18:17I can't believe it.
18:18Mona Lisa shooting at us with a weapon stolen from my painting.
18:21Talk about weird.
18:23Lionel Harding, the gallery's curator, seemed thrilled, though,
18:26to be meeting his favourite painting in the flesh.
18:29It is you.
18:31It really is you.
18:34And you are going to have to get used to that.
18:37Because we've got a lot of work to do.
18:40I don't understand.
18:42We have to find my brother.
18:46What does he look like, your brother?
18:51I've never seen him, so I haven't got a clue.
18:54But he'll have been painted around the same time as me.
18:57In the same place as me.
18:59Next door, in fact.
19:02I've got it!
19:04Follow me.
19:06Pretty freaky, eh?
19:08And well worth including in the alien files.
19:10A painting comes to life, looking for another painting,
19:14which he calls her brother.
19:16Time for the lowdown on the alien connection
19:18with the Mona Lisa and her brother, Mr Smith.
19:21The Mona Lisa was actually painted six times by Leonardo da Vinci,
19:26after being commissioned in 1505 by a Captain Tancredi,
19:30who was in fact Scaroff the Jaggeroff, posing as a human.
19:35Leonardo borrowed paint from his neighbour,
19:37another artist called Giuseppe di Cattivo,
19:40not realising that the paint originated from sentient minerals
19:44carried to Earth in a meteorite.
19:46One of di Cattivo's paintings, that had been created with the same paint,
19:50was also being stored in the International Gallery.
19:53It was this painting that Mona Lisa called her brother.
19:57And the Mona Lisa's brother wasn't just a nice farmyard scene
20:01or a bowl of fruit, was he?
20:03It was a work of art called The Abomination.
20:06Painting it drove di Cattivo insane.
20:09To ensure that no-one else ever laid eyes on what he had created,
20:13he locked it in a wooden case secured with a Chinese puzzle.
20:17A sight so horrific that if you look at it once, you go mad.
20:21I don't feel like that teacher maths at my school.
20:24To sum up, the Mona Lisa is a masterpiece
20:27with an unexpected alien connection,
20:30as sentient minerals contained in its paintwork
20:33can lead to the animation of its highly unpredictable subject,
20:36Mona Lisa herself.
20:38Definite traces of alien energy.
20:40Sarah Jane had heard on the news what had happened
20:43and knew that we were there,
20:45so she headed straight to the International Gallery and straight into trouble.
20:49Mum!
20:52That's Mum!
20:57Sarah Jane! Mum!
20:59Luke?
21:01Sarah Jane had wanted to put herself in the picture
21:04and that's exactly what happened,
21:06but not in the way she had intended.
21:08No.
21:10Mum!
21:13I'd heard of being immortalised in oils, but this was ridiculous.
21:17What could it have been like for poor Sarah Jane?
21:20Stuck there, powerless to do anything,
21:22inside a painting.
21:24So while Sarah Jane was otherwise engaged,
21:27it was down to us to try to stop the madness
21:29the Mona Lisa was letting loose in the gallery.
21:32Run!
21:35He's right behind you!
21:37You might ask, how come Mona Lisa had been brought to life
21:40and was able to do the same to other paintings?
21:42It's a picture come to life.
21:44He can fire as many times as he likes.
21:46Well, let Clyde explain.
21:48It was all down to the paint Leonardo da Vinci had used to create her.
21:51The living paint extracted from the meteor,
21:53which had created an energy that could bring paintings to life.
21:57The same paint was also used to create the Abomination,
22:01the painting Mona Lisa called her brother.
22:04Once she's unlocked her brother, she'll be finished with you.
22:08Are you hoping I wasn't going to make any difference?
22:11Believe me.
22:13We're both going to get abominated.
22:15I know.
22:17What can I do now?
22:22The Abomination had been locked away in the gallery's vault for years,
22:25but because the two paintings, the Abomination and the Mona Lisa,
22:29were now close to each other, that allowed them to come to life.
22:39The Abomination was still locked in its case, though,
22:42and that was lucky, judging by the noise it was making.
22:46If you ask me, it doesn't seem all that pleased to see you.
22:49You show some respect for my brother in living paint.
22:52Because once he's out there, then you'll see some fireworks.
22:59Lisa, you can't do this.
23:00He's right. You can't.
23:02What's this, Hadas?
23:04Remember where you've left your backbone all of a sudden?
23:06No.
23:08The puzzle lock is missing.
23:12Where is it?
23:16Luke worked out that the puzzle lock
23:18that would open the cabinet the Abomination was held in
23:21was another exhibit in the museum.
23:23This is the key to the Abomination.
23:25Somehow it was separated from the painting
23:27and catalogued by the gallery as just another work of art.
23:30No-one ever realised what it really was.
23:34But if Mona Lisa wants to free the Abomination, she's going to need this.
23:37And we can use that to force her to release Mum.
23:39Are you going to bargain with her?
23:41It's a nice idea, kid, but I don't do deals.
23:44Not while I'm packing heat.
23:46Go fetch!
23:51If you fire that blaster at us, you'll destroy the puzzle lock.
23:54Well, that's why I'm not going to fire it, then.
23:56Unless you do something stupid, like smash the puzzle.
23:59Which you won't.
24:01Because I've got your friend, Clyde.
24:06But when it looked like Mona Lisa was about to get her hands on the puzzle lock,
24:10it was Lionel's turn to spring a surprise.
24:12Now give me the puzzle lock.
24:18Not until you have released Miss Trump and this young man's mother.
24:23You won't.
24:25You wouldn't dare.
24:29No!
24:36Oh, you're so going to wish you hadn't done that.
24:40Well, for about a second, anyway.
24:42No! Don't!
24:44There's another way to release the Abomination.
24:46I can help you.
24:48Turned out this other way to release the Abomination
24:51relied on Leonardo DeClyde's ability to draw an exact copy of the puzzle lock.
24:56Just do it!
24:58Mind you, as that was going to uncage the Abomination,
25:01it didn't seem like one of Lukey's better plans,
25:04but he's a boy genius, so sometimes you just have to give him the benefit of the doubt.
25:12Give it to me.
25:15I don't know what you're doing, my Padme.
25:17That's not bad, Clyde.
25:20That's not bad at all.
25:22Using the living paint energy, Mona Lisa turned my drawn puzzle lock into a real one.
25:28Have it.
25:29I really hope you know what you're doing.
25:31Here, my brother.
25:50Your deliverance.
25:59Don't worry.
26:07I was beginning to think Luke had got it horribly wrong,
26:10but I shouldn't have doubted him.
26:12It's coming out!
26:13Don't look at it!
26:14My brother.
26:16He'd remembered that I'd done a sketch of K-9 on the next page in the pad,
26:20so when all that living paint energy was flying about,
26:23it also brought K-9 to life.
26:25Don't let that metal notch in here.
26:28And he's more than a match for any abomination.
26:32No!
26:40No, my brother, don't abandon me!
26:42No!
26:49No!
27:03Oh, Miss Trump.
27:07Phyllis.
27:10I've had the most bizarre dream.
27:12Oh, Luke!
27:17Include Clyde.
27:19Uploading two new entries into the alien files.
27:22As a permanent record for all to learn about these deadly threats to Earth's safety.
27:33The Berserkers.
27:35The alien originators of a Norse warrior race.
27:39The personality-changing pendants they utilise to help expand their armies
27:43can have a drastic effect on anyone who uses them.
27:47Do not be tempted to make use of one, as only disaster can ensue.
27:52The Mona Lisa.
27:54This masterpiece created by one of Earth's greatest artists has an alien connection
27:59in the form of its paint made from sentient minerals extracted from a meteor.
28:04Its subject, Mona Lisa, if brought to life, is unpredictable and dangerous.
28:10The painting must be kept away from the abomination to prevent them both reanimating once more.
28:17So, if you ever come across any of this lot and the professionals aren't around to help you,
28:22now you know what to do.
28:24Think clearly, act decisively and expect the unexpected.
28:28And try to make sure there's a genetically modified boy genius about the place
28:32that can come in useful.
29:02Millie in Between, now at 5.30 on Wednesday on CBBC and CBBC HD.
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