Lie Detector | movie | 2011 | Official Clip - video Dailymotion

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A job interview takes an awkward turn when a lie detector reveals the unfiltered truths and hidden feelings of everyone  | dG1fQ2pWVk51cmFseTg

Transcript

00:00So, Mr. Hanson, as you know, we have all prospective employees take a lie detector test prior to

00:13joining our firm.

00:14So, if you don't mind, we're going to begin with a couple of control questions.

00:19Should I be hooked up to something?

00:21With the old system, yes, but with the new Lie Detector 3000, it's programmed to go off

00:25when it hears you tell a lie.

00:27For example, go ahead and tell an obvious lie.

00:31Grass is blue.

00:33I'm a tall black man.

00:34I've never seen Jersey Shore.

00:36I love it.

00:37I've never missed one.

00:38I've heard good things.

00:41Now go ahead and say something that is true so we can properly calibrate the machine.

00:45I have a 12-inch penis.

00:50That's kind of weird.

00:51It should have gone off.

00:53Why?

00:54Because there's no way you...

00:55I have a 12-inch penis.

00:56Actually, it might be 13.

00:57No?

00:58I guess it's 12.

00:59Wait, seriously?

01:00Hey, Mike, did you get a chance to email me those mission statements?

01:04Uh, yeah.

01:05I did it last night.

01:06I did it this morning.

01:07All right.

01:08I haven't even started yet.

01:09Well, Mike, you're the best.

01:11You suck.

01:12I'll be back at my desk working.

01:13I'll be playing Angry Birds on my phone.

01:20Please state your full name.

01:21Dane Christopher Hanson.

01:23Is it true that you reside at 1444 North Sierra Bonita Avenue?

01:27Yes.

01:28Apartment 3.

01:29How do you do it, man?

01:32Oh.

01:33When I moved here, I went on Westside Rental.

01:35No.

01:36It's like $80.

01:37How do you live with a 12-inch penis?

01:39I mean, how is that even possible?

01:41Okay.

01:42I'm getting a little uncomfortable with this line of questioning.

01:45Sorry.

01:46I'm sorry.

01:47You're all right.

01:48I mean, it's just a 12 inches.

01:49That is like a freaking beef bus, you know what I'm saying?

01:53Why are you so concerned about my penis anyhow?

01:55I mean, are you gay or something?

01:58What?

01:59No.

02:00Hey, nobody loves pussy more than I do.

02:02All right.

02:03I'm a flaming homosexual, but do me a favor.

02:06Don't tell anybody because nobody knows.

02:08Everybody knows.

02:09So wait.

02:10Tell people?

02:11No.

02:12Have you ever been fired from a job before?

02:16No.

02:17Three times.

02:18Have you ever stolen from an employer before?

02:19No.

02:20All right.

02:21Damn it.

02:23How much would you say you've stolen before?

02:24$100.

02:25$500.

02:26That's how much I've lost count.

02:29$44,793.

02:30That's a lot of money, Dane.

02:33Well, I had cancer.

02:36I bought a boat and named it Cancer.

02:40I'm going to be honest, Dane.

02:44This interview is going really well.

02:45Yeah?

02:46No.

02:47This is the worst interview I've ever been a part of.

02:49Normally, you'd be gone.

02:51However, company policy dictates I ask you one final question.

02:55Okay.

02:56Would you ever have sex with a man in order to get a job?

02:59No.

03:00Welcome to the firm.

Lie Detector | movie | 2011 | Official Clip

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