words and music: T. Hakola contact/info: www.theohakola.com
THE DOG SONG
Dogs are gods heaven-sent to help us pull through clods hell-bent on eats, treats, and shoes... to chew Dogs are nimble and dogs are quick, and Dogs will devour a candlestick Dogs will gobble it down lock stock and wick then cough it back up in a conjuring trick Thus testing your cynophilia to the limit contesting the whole idea of interspecies kinship Dogs are soft and silky sweethearts pure joie de vivre and electric guitars Dogs are wolves minus the smarts and in Salt Lake City dogs chase parked cars
If I before I die a dog I do not acquire, in the sweet bye and bye, it’s sadly I’ll expire Strutting too long muttless my hour upon the stage It’s sadly I’ll egress when I turn my last page
The husky is a god, heaven-sent to pull us through The pug lives for eats, treats and shoes to chew Web-pawed Labradors can paddle longer than Phelps while a bulldog snores louder than a Dalmatian yelps
It’s acute OCD that ails the golden retriever and a tossed tennis ball the only way to relieve her The Great Pyrenees pin-up is pea-brain bimbo dim, the Yorkshire a fussy pocket pup, the bull terrier a ghostly sin
With boxers’ lives so short, they’re allowed on the bed where the heat rising from their brindle coats goes nicely to your head The poodle’s a rat with ringlets getting by on prostitution while no one can deny the basset hound’s comic constitution
And the Shakespeare of the houndsphere is the master of the pasture bar none With a lexis big as Texas, the Border Collie’s the bestest the blue-eyed peak of canis evolution
And if I don’t acquire a damn dog before I die it’s sadly I’ll expire in the sweet bye and bye Yes, I’ve gone through life in a dogless haze Sans canine wife to light up my days Strutting muttless my hour upon the stage It’s petless I’ll egress, riven by regrets, fretting dogless my very last page
