Dropsy, Scurvy, and Typhoid: It’s All In Mom’s Note

Proving Ground

The most crucial piece of evidence required for an excused absence was the note from a parent. My young, hip mom and I would often put the most obscure diseases on that note.

Transcript

00:00Dropsy, scurvy, and typhoid. It's all in mom's note.

00:05For a handful of gallant grade students, there was a sheet of paper with a gold star to celebrate

00:09their perfect attendance. For the rest of us, there were mental health days.

00:15The school system built five days of excused absenteeism into the student handbook. And

00:20who was I to go against the student handbook? It helped to have an understanding young mother

00:24who didn't mind having an extra pair of hands when she had a crafting deadline to meet or

00:29a freelance babysitting gig.

00:33The timing of these mental health breaks was critical. They couldn't be on a test day,

00:38the weather had to be near perfect, and any make-up work would have to be manageable.

00:43Other than that, it was Bob Barker, the young and the restless, and a trip to the park for

00:48this guy. I could have just as easily been Mod Podge, Plaster of Paris, and Wedding Chocolates

00:55The price of freedom was often crafting or babysitting. Everything hinged on the one

01:00crucial piece of information the school required.

01:04Mom and I realized the actual disease didn't matter, like the first three minutes of Cops

01:09or the last three minutes of Jerry Springer. We would look up the most obscure medical

01:14conditions from world history, and she would sign the note.

01:18I'm a proud survivor of laughing disease, smallpox, and pleurisy.

01:23Are telethons still a thing?

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