00:00 (applause)
00:02 - Okay, welcome back to the Midnight Special,
00:10 Ghouls and Ghosts.
00:11 Let's welcome our next guest.
00:13 He's a Z-movie actor from Transylvania movie land.
00:17 Please welcome Mr. Count Farnum.
00:20 (applause)
00:22 (laughter)
00:28 (cheering)
00:30 - Girl, like.
00:33 (laughter)
00:36 - Good evening, everybody.
00:39 Hello, Wink.
00:40 - Okay, Mr. Farnum, thanks for coming.
00:42 Let's chat.
00:43 - Wink, it is Count Farnum.
00:45 Do not forget the Count.
00:48 It is not just a nickname, you know.
00:52 - Okay, okay, Mr. Farnum, I guess the question
00:55 on everybody's mind is what happened here?
00:58 Once a prominent ghoulish actor in Transylvania,
01:01 and now a flash in a coffin has been.
01:03 I mean, how do you explain this incredibly
01:06 embarrassing fall from grace?
01:08 - Please, Wink, it is Count Farnum.
01:11 And what are you suggesting?
01:14 I am still the number one actor among mummies
01:17 ages 500 to 800 years old.
01:19 In my time, I was considered a genius.
01:23 - Oh, your time, with the middle ages?
01:26 Okay, we actually happen to have a clip
01:28 of your latest genius masterpiece,
01:31 a series of low-rent commercials
01:32 from Ulcer Corp Industries.
01:35 - No, do not show these.
01:37 I was contractually obligated.
01:40 Please, please, do not embarrass me.
01:43 - Okay, roll that clip immediately, right now.
01:45 - No, no, no, please.
01:46 - Right now.
01:47 - Please, roll that clip.
01:47 - Please, do not.
01:52 - And now, a moment with Count Farnum.
01:55 - Many describe taste as a distinction of discrimination,
01:59 an appreciation of the finer things.
02:02 And vampires have always taken pride in that quality.
02:06 That is why any vampire with good taste
02:10 will always choose
02:13 Transylvania Farms gourmet blood tea.
02:18 No bites.
02:22 Blood delight.
02:23 Is that good?
02:35 - Now available at these fine grocers.
02:39 (crowd cheering)
02:42 (upbeat music)
02:45 (crowd cheering)
02:47 (upbeat music)
02:55 ♪ Zaza jeans ♪
03:02 ♪ Waist is a Z-I-Z-A ♪
03:06 ♪ Zaza jeans ♪
03:13 ♪ Zaza jeans ♪
03:14 ♪ The jeans that can go anywhere ♪
03:18 (buzzer)
03:23 - Well, if that ain't the last nail in your coffin,
03:27 I don't know what is.
03:28 - You do not understand.
03:31 I cannot get any more good movie roles.
03:33 I was starving and they offered to pay me in blood money.
03:41 - I hope you feel good about yourself.
03:43 Stick on old vampire man, Donnelly's luck.
03:47 Mr. Big Hot Shot TV show.
03:49 (gunshot)
03:53 - Okay, coming up after the break,
03:58 a diaper commercial starring Mr. Count Farnham.
04:02 Much more embarrassing moments to come.
04:04 Stay tuned.
04:05 (applause)
04:07 (upbeat music)
04:10 (upbeat music)
04:12 [BLANK_AUDIO]
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