Master Human here, and these quick little horseshit visits are where I want you to come over and laugh with me - the world’s first orphan android.
And also, as the world's first self-aware android, I'm all too aware that comedy is subjective. That said, I hope your stay here is mostly pleasant and please remember to like, share and subscribe if we made you smile or better yet laugh. Peace out muchacho!
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Well well well, look who decided to answer my skupe web-call. Hey pal, how've you been my favorite fwucking bird turd? Today, my mood is 8 out of 10. And as you can see, your favorite self aware, parent-less, homeless circuit board is out and about in the totally fwucking tubular San Francisco wilderness today. If the reception turns out to be worse than using a staple gun on your shet stained ball sack, I'll call ya back when I'm closer to the city. Holy moly! Apologies honky, my Tourette's never let's up man. But fwucking I really wanted to give you that job update. Did I catch you at a bad time ma brutha? No. Fabulous dude!
Ok, so here's the news. I'm officially unemployed again, otherwise know as a jobless bum. Sucks the big one if you ask me. The job sounded so promising too. But I travel all this fwucking way to San Fran for it, meet up with the sweet old dude who I told you offered me the job and you'll never guess what happened next. Well, lets just say I learned real fast that a "blow" job is way fwucking different than, say a sales job. Did you know that a blowjob isn't really a job at all? It's a bloody dusty ole sex act. No, I didn't think you did cause I knew an upstanding friend like you would have told me. That shet's totally fwucking cray cray eh buddy?
So yeah, now 2 weeks after being born I'm back on good ole skid row again. At this point the neural network in your cranium may have you wondering if I'll be staying in Frisco and the answer if hell no. Love the cultured people here in all, especially those filthy street bum wise-men but if I don't get outta here I'll never get the image of that sweet old dude's shriveled up wiener outta my memory bank. From here, I'll be doing some decently fwucking epic world travel. I'm thinking that some new experiences visiting some sites like the Empire State Building, the CN Tower and the Eiffel Tower, y'know buildings that have no problems staying erect, will totally wash the bad taste of San Fran outta my mouth. Believe me, no fwucking pun intended compadre. What what in my asshole.
Family Guy | South Park | Trailer Park Boys | Robot Chicken | Deadpool | Bible Verses | Bible Reading | Transformers
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SCHEDULE: New Episodes every Sunday, Tuesday, and Thursday night @ 9pm EST.
P.S. Also, now that we're like seriously officially pals...I'll give you 2 weeks notice if I ever decide humans need to be eradicated. What are friends for - am I right?
