00:00Good.
00:03Excuse me, this is private.
00:05You must be Steve.
00:05Saskia, please.
00:07I'm sorry.
00:08You can't just come barging in a...
00:10Oh, I think we can.
00:11I tried to explain and she wouldn't listen.
00:14What's going on?
00:15They've been having an affair.
00:17While she was planning my wedding, she was trying to steal my fiancée.
00:25He's making it up.
00:26Tell him.
00:27The game's up, sweetheart.
00:30Who are they?
00:31I'm Will.
00:32We met once before, briefly.
00:34Hang on a minute, I'm not shaking your hand.
00:36He was a client, they were a client.
00:38She was supposed to be planning our wedding.
00:40And what happened?
00:41I went away with work.
00:43That's what happened.
00:44You can piece the rest together.
00:46Tried to explain last week.
00:48We're starting again.
00:51I owe her the truth.
00:55They used to go out with each other.
00:57Did she tell you that?
00:58She didn't tell me anything.
01:00We were just kids, Steve.
01:02We were 14.
01:03It was nothing.
01:04What, you were childhood sweet ass?
01:06I should have known better than to leave him on his own with a face like that.
01:11We didn't go all the way, Steve.
01:12I swear.
01:13And that's the God's honest truth.
01:14I should slap her face off.
01:16Oh, go on, Ned.
01:18He came back a week later.
01:19Did he tell you that?
01:22No.
01:22No.
01:23I didn't think it was important.
01:26Yeah.
01:27Once he'd kicked you into touch, he came back professing his undying love for me.
01:32He wanted to make a go of it.
01:35What?
01:37Why did you have to tell her that?
01:38Why did you have to tell her anything?
01:41I'm trying to be honest.
01:42Yeah, well, so am I.
01:46Maybe we should get going.
01:47So that's why you sloped back to me?
01:51Steve, I turned him down, all right?
01:54I made a mistake, and I regretted it.
01:57I trusted you.
01:59I paid her a deposit.
02:00I literally paid her to seduce him.
02:03I'll tell you what, then.
02:04Have it back, sweetheart.
02:06How much was it, eh?
02:07200 quid.
02:08Look, forget about the money.
02:10No, no, no, no.
02:10I'll take the money.
02:11I'll write your check.
02:13Look, hit me.
02:14I deserve it.
02:15You're crying out loud.
02:16No, it's only fair.
02:17Take a swing, Steve.
02:18Lay me out.
02:20No, I'm not going to hit you.
02:21But why not?
02:22Because I'm flipping right-handed.
02:23Use your left.
02:24Just hit him.
02:25Don't hit him, Steve.
02:26Oh, God, will everyone please just shut up?
02:28I'm not going to hit anyone.
02:29I just want you to go.
02:32Right.
02:34OK, come on.
02:34Let's go.
02:37And again, Mum.
02:39I'm sorry.
02:53We never went all the way, Steve.
02:55You can't believe me.
02:57Yeah, so you keep saying like I'm supposed to be grateful.
02:59It's something, Charlie.
03:03She'd have stayed in Spain.
03:05You've messed up before.
03:08There was Becky.
03:09Oh, yeah, don't throw Becky in me face.
03:11You threw her in mine.
03:12Well, we're married now.
03:14There's a difference.
03:15How is it?
03:15How is there a difference?
03:16We're supposed to be in love.
03:18We are in love.
03:19Liar!
03:20Hey, but you know what?
03:21It don't matter.
03:23Because you didn't go all the way.
03:29Newsflash, they're not.
03:30Not by a long chalk.
03:31Did she?
03:32Or did she not say her vows in front of God?
03:34I don't know.
03:36Your friends and your family and your neighbours.
03:39How long ago did she do her vows?
03:41About a year.
03:42Just over a year and she does this to you?
03:44That's wrong, Steve, with a capital R.
03:49Yes, pal?
03:50It's Steve here.
03:52You!
03:52What are you flipping doing here?
03:54What, is that him?
03:55That's him!
03:55What do you think you're playing at,
03:56making a clown on my friend and then coming back for more?
03:58I just wanted to say Michelle wasn't lying.
04:01We didn't go to bed.
04:02Well, we were on the bed at one stage, but...
04:04Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa!
04:06TMI!
04:07But we didn't close the deal.
04:09How dare you!
04:09Or she wouldn't.
04:10She stayed loyal.
04:11Loyal?
04:12Loyal?
04:12You're telling me that my wife's loyal
04:14because she rolled around on her bed with you
04:16but didn't go that distance?
04:17It's true!
04:19Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, whoa, whoa, whoa.
04:20Not with your arm, Steve.
04:22Now, go on, get out of it, before you get out.
04:24Well, he can't hurt me with his left.
04:27Who's talking about him?
04:29Oh, what?
04:30Oh, yeah.
04:31I'll take me chances with you, Pat.
04:32Would you now?
04:33Yeah.
04:34Hey, distance between me and him!
04:37Oh, Tim!
04:39Get him!
04:40I've got him!
04:41I've got him, Steve!
04:42I've got him!
04:50Where have you been?
04:51Tim had a fight with your boyfriend.
04:54He's not my boyfriend.
04:56He was.
05:05I'll tell you everything.
05:07Ah, sounds like fun.
05:09We'll go back 26 years.
05:12Haven't got enough time, have we?
05:13Well, then we'll stay up late.
05:16Do you not think I get attention?
05:18You don't think women fancy me?
05:20I'm sure they do.
05:21I was fighting them off over there.
05:23We made vows, Michelle, vows!
05:26You were in Spain, Steve.
05:28You were avoiding me.
05:30You were avoiding life.
05:32I was recuperating.
05:34Doesn't mean you can jump into bed with someone else.
05:36I didn't go to bed with him.
05:38You were on the bed, though.
05:39I know that for a fact.
05:41You were on the bed.
05:42Who told you that?
05:43He did.
05:44When?
05:45When he came in the cab office.
05:47He had a fight with Tim.
05:50Yes.
05:51If my flipping arm weren't busted.
05:55OK, Steve, I was on the bed, all right?
05:59I was on the bed.
06:01But that is it.
06:02I mean, he was...
06:03He was showering me with attention.
06:06And I didn't even know if you were ever coming back.
06:11What was I supposed to do?
06:13Wait forever?
06:14Yes!
06:14What?
06:15You're not the victim here, Steve.
06:17And neither is Tim.
06:19I am.
06:19I am.
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