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00:00Roderick ripped my shirt open and froze.
00:03My back was covered in scars, old and new, all from whippings.
00:07What the hell happened here?
00:11I misbehaved. They punished me for it.
00:14My voice was flat, like I was talking about someone else's body.
00:18He stared at the scars he'd never seen.
00:21Then he said,
00:24You deserved it.
00:26He sent me to that place three years ago to cure me of loving him.
00:32I spent three years locked inside that place.
00:35Now, I stopped loving him, just as he wanted.
00:38Then he came running back and said,
00:40I regret it.
00:42For eight years, I was a fixture by Roderick Dunlap's side.
00:46Everyone said I was addicted to him.
00:48I was so obsessed with him that I'd run off any woman who got close to him,
00:52whatever it took.
00:53Once, I offered one of them money to leave Roderick.
00:58The woman laughed in my face.
01:00Being with Roderick meant an endless supply of cash.
01:03Why would anyone walk away for such a pathetic amount?
01:07Then that woman took a staged fall down a flight of stairs.
01:11Roderick thought I pushed her.
01:14And I ended up being sent to a rehab center by him.
01:22Others went there to quit smoking, drinking, or gaming.
01:25I was there to let go of Roderick.
01:28In the end, I succeeded only for him to tell me he regretted it.
01:32The moment I stepped out of the rehab center, I saw an Audi parked there.
01:37It looked totally out of place.
01:40I glanced at it and lowered my head, preparing to walk away.
01:43The person who got out of the car called out to me.
01:47It was Roderick.
01:48Roderick.
01:49He had grown more mature in the last three years.
01:52I glanced at him once, then looked away.
01:54The staff at the center taught us that staring was rude, especially at someone we liked.
02:00Yes, after three years, I had been completely reformed.
02:07Roderick told me to get in, and I did so, sitting quietly in the back seat.
02:11I kept my head down, staring at my lap and not moving a muscle.
02:16Roderick sat beside me.
02:18I could feel the weight of his intense gaze.
02:20The car was dead quiet.
02:22I held my breath, scared to make a peep.
02:24But a cough escaped me anyway.
02:26It was just my old cough.
02:28The car pulled up at the Dunlap's mansion.
02:31Roderick's grandmother, Maggie Dunlap, lived there.
02:35Today, as I remembered, marked her 80th birthday.
02:39Then it hit me why Roderick had come to get me.
02:41He started to walk in.
02:43I hesitated for a second, then blurted out.
02:48Um, Roderick?
02:50I didn't bring a gift.
02:52When he turned around, my heart was pounding out of my chest.
02:57I quickly looked down.
02:59I knew my quickened heartbeat was from fear, not from affection.
03:04Somehow, I'd turned into a total coward.
03:06If someone even glanced my way, I'd get a jolt of fear.
03:12I'd toss and turn all night in nightmares, haunted by those staring eyes.
03:18Follow me.
03:20Roderick brushed off my worry.
03:21He was as cold as always.
03:24Or maybe he only saved that coldness for me.
03:27I had to jog a little just to keep up with him.
03:31Mari!
03:32You're back!
03:33Come in, dear!
03:34Maggie was right there at the front door.
03:36Waiting for me, Dot Maggie, had always had my back.
03:39Always encouraged my crush on Roderick and even snuck me info on his plans.
03:43I walked over to her.
03:46Hello, Maggie.
03:47Mari, honey.
03:49Why are you being so distant?
03:51You're not mad at me for what happened, are you?
03:53Maggie stroked my hair, her eyes full of affection.
03:56I shook my head.
03:57I could never be mad at her three years ago.
04:00If Maggie hadn't threatened to harm herself, I probably would have been sent to jail instead.
04:06On the outside, it looked like a regular school.
04:09But only the people who'd been locked up there knew what real torture was like.
04:15During the meal, I kept my head down, shoveling down spaghetti as fast as I could.
04:20I didn't make a sound, didn't reach for anything else.
04:23Just ate fast like I hadn't had a meal in a month.
04:28Marianne!
04:29Yes, sir!
04:30Hearing my name, I set down my fork and stood up straight.
04:33We all froze me, Roderick, and Maggie.
04:36I met their shocked stares for a split second.
04:39Then I looked down at the silverware I'd set neatly on the table.
04:43Even with how panicked I was, I just stood there, confused.
04:47It hit me then I'd forgotten I wasn't at the center anymore.
04:51I had no idea why Roderick had called me.
04:53You scared her, you big idiot!
04:56Maggie swatted Roderick's arm before turning to me.
04:58Sit down, Mary.
05:00You're home now, sweetie.
05:02Just relax.
05:04I did what Maggie said and sat back down.
05:07But I couldn't eat another bite.
05:08Something about the way they looked at me told me they'd noticed.
05:11The girl who walked in three years ago was gone.
05:14And the one sitting here now was someone they didn't recognize.
05:19Grandma was talking to you.
05:21Why weren't you listening?
05:25Roderick's tone was sharp.
05:27I couldn't tell if he was mad I'd ignored Maggie,
05:29or just ticked off about getting swatted.
05:31I'm sorry, Maggie.
05:33I was just very hungry.
05:35I didn't hear you.
05:36I gave her an apologetic look.
05:38The counselors at the center always drilled it into us.
05:42Apologies have to be sincere.
05:44Only I knew the truth.
05:46It wasn't hunger.
05:47It was fear.
05:48Fear of getting punished for not eating fast enough,
05:51or for leaving food on my plate.
05:52I vaguely recalled her telling me to try the other food.
05:56I'd heard her, but I just couldn't react fast enough.
05:59So Roderick called out to me.
06:01By the time dinner was over,
06:03my forehead was covered in a light sweat.
06:06I wasn't sure if it was from the heat in the room,
06:08or my own anxiety.
06:10Three years in that place had taught me one thing.
06:12Never let your guard down, not even at a dinner table.
06:17After dinner, I returned to Grandpa's old house.
06:22Thank you for the ride.
06:24I gave Roderick a small bow.
06:26Maggie had wanted me to stay the night,
06:28but I'd turned her down.
06:29I didn't want any more contact with them than I had to,
06:32so I'd asked Roderick to drive me home.
06:36You really want to stay here?
06:38Roderick frowned.
06:39I glanced back at the house.
06:41It hadn't been touched in three years.
06:43Now it was completely overgrown with weeds.
06:45But I nodded.
06:47I had nowhere else to go anyway.
06:49I was flat broke,
06:51and the clothes I was wearing were from three years ago.
06:53The rehab center had given us uniforms,
06:55so these clothes had never even been worn out.
06:59I bent down to pull some weeds,
07:01the little critters living there scurried away.
07:03I saw cockroaches, mice,
07:05and a snake coiled in the corner,
07:06too lazy to move.
07:08Once upon a time,
07:09I would have jumped straight into Roderick's arms.
07:12Now, I just stared at them calmly
07:13and looked for a stick to shoo the snake away.
07:18Roderick pulled me back toward the car.
07:22What's wrong?
07:23I didn't even realize he was still there.
07:25Didn't you see that snake?
07:27Oh, right, I'd forgotten Roderick hated reptiles.
07:34I saw it.
07:35It's fine.
07:37I'll just shoo it away with a stick.
07:39If it bothers you,
07:40you can just leave!
07:42I caught myself reassuring him.
07:45I reached for the door handle,
07:47ready to hop out.
07:48But Roderick locked the doors and drove off.
07:51I quickly buckled my seatbelt.
07:54Where are you taking me?
07:57He didn't say a word.
07:59I didn't dare ask again.
08:00He took me to his private apartment.
08:02He closed the door behind us without a word.
08:06I couldn't leave it was a keypad lock.
08:08He went straight to the shower,
08:11probably trying to wash off the creeps
08:13from seeing all those critters.
08:14I sat straight on the living room couch.
08:17About an hour later,
08:18Roderick came downstairs in pajamas,
08:20his hair still wet.
08:22I knew better than to stare.
08:24Stay here until your place is cleaned up.
08:26You can sleep here tonight.
08:28I thought about it for a second,
08:30then nodded.
08:31Thank you.
08:32That house was a mess.
08:34Tackling it all alone
08:35would have kept me going way past midnight.
08:37He walked over.
08:38I stood up and stepped aside without thinking.
08:41Roderick grabbed my chin,
08:43forcing me to look at him.
08:45So you're over me?
08:46His expression was questioning.
08:50Yes.
08:50I didn't hesitate for a second.
08:53Any delay would have felt like an insult
08:55to everything I'd been through.
08:57That night, the nightmare returned.
08:59In my dream,
09:01countless eyes stared back at me,
09:03filled with hatred,
09:04disgust, and contempt.
09:06Every single one of them belonged to Roderick.
09:10The next day,
09:11when Roderick left for work,
09:13I asked him to drop me off downtown.
09:16He didn't seem to mind,
09:17as long as I wasn't in his way.
09:20I hesitated in front of a florist's hiring sign.
09:23I didn't have a college degree.
09:25I never finished college,
09:26because Roderick had me sent to that rehab center.
09:29Hunting for a job?
09:30The shop owner noticed me staring at the sign,
09:33but not coming in.
09:34So he finally asked.
09:36I nodded.
09:37The owner looked to be in his mid-twenties,
09:39and he seemed pretty nice.
09:41The pay was $3,000 monthly,
09:43and no diploma was required.
09:45I just had to be on time to help out at the shop every day.
09:49I asked the owner for a $1,000 advance.
09:52Money makes the world go round.
09:53I needed it for everything.
09:55My official start date was the next day,
09:57and to my surprise,
09:58he trusted me.
09:59I spent $400 on a used electric scooter from a local shop.
10:04Once upon a time,
10:06$400 wouldn't have meant squat to me.
10:08Now, I had to haggle just to get it for that price.
10:11It's not like I was an orphan or anything.
10:14Three years ago,
10:15my parents disowned me.
10:16To protect the company and the family's reputation,
10:19the only person who'd ever really loved me grandpa
10:22was gone a long time ago.
10:23If he were still here,
10:25I probably never would have ended up like this.
10:29I rode the scooter back to grandpa's old house.
10:32The weeds outside were already gone.
10:34Roderick must have sent someone to clear them.
10:36Inside,
10:37everything was covered in a thick layer of dust and cobwebs.
10:42It took me for hours just to make the place halfway livable.
10:46Most of the stuff inside was broken beyond fixing.
10:50I was trying to carry out the junk when I tripped.
10:55Everything went flying all over the floor.
10:58I was a mess my knee hurt,
10:59and I was covered in dirt.
11:01I saw a pair of shiny leather shoes stop in front of me.
11:04I didn't even have to look up to know who they belonged to.
11:08I got up slowly,
11:09my knee throbbing with pain.
11:12Mr. Dunlop,
11:14Can I help you with something?
11:16I'd gone from calling him Rod,
11:17to Roderick,
11:18and now to Mr. Dunlop.
11:21It was better this way keeping my distance.
11:23I never wanted to go back to that hellhole ever again.
11:27Grandma sent me to check on how you're doing.
11:29Roderick's brow was furrowed.
11:31Please tell her I'm fine,
11:32and she doesn't have to worry about me.
11:34I crouched back down to clean up the mess
11:37that fall had just made everything worse.
11:42Roderick grabbed me by the back of my collar,
11:44with a tear,
11:45my shirt split right open.
11:46It was the same shirt I'd worn yesterday
11:48and the same one I'd had three years ago.
11:50The fabric was so thin it tore almost instantly.
11:54Mr. Dunlop,
11:55have some respect!
11:57My voice was sharp with anger
11:58as I clutched the torn fabric.
12:00Thank God it was only the back that tore,
12:02but it was my only shirt.
12:04I hadn't had time to buy new clothes,
12:06and now how was I supposed to go shopping?
12:08But Roderick's eyes were fixed on the scars on my back.
12:13What the hell happened here?
12:15I misbehaved.
12:17They punished me for it.
12:18My voice was flat,
12:20like I was talking about someone else's pain.
12:23You deserved it.
12:24He walked out.
12:25I glanced over my shoulder.
12:27My back was covered in scars old and new,
12:29all from whippings.
12:31The newest ones were probably from a few days ago.
12:34I couldn't even remember exactly which day.
12:36They hadn't even fully healed yet.
12:41I found a dusty shirt in the closet,
12:43shook it off,
12:44and slipped it on right away.
12:46Pretty soon,
12:46I felt an itch on my back,
12:48right over the wounds.
12:49They probably got infected.
12:51Of course,
12:52just as I was heading out to buy new clothes,
12:55Roderick came back.
12:56Was he back to laugh at me?
12:58He tossed a bag at me?
13:01Change into these.
13:03I refused.
13:04He had a girlfriend,
13:05and it felt wrong for him to be buying me clothes.
13:08But it had been three years.
13:10Maybe Chelsea was his wife now,
13:12not that I cared.
13:13Roderick pulled me roughly back inside the house.
13:16I sat down and did what he told me.
13:18He cleaned the wounds on my back
13:20with antiseptic and rubbing alcohol.
13:22It stung.
13:22But I didn't make a sound.
13:24It was nothing next to what I'd been through.
13:26His hands were rough but strangely careful.
13:29Like he was trying to undo something he couldn't name.
13:34Why's this one right here across your waist?
13:36Roderick pointed to a particularly ugly scar.
13:39It wasn't just a surface scrape
13:41whoever hit me had aimed right for my kidneys.
13:43I shook my head.
13:45Um,
13:46I don't know.
13:47He finished up cleaning the wounds
13:48and helped pull my shirt down.
13:51Why did they do this to you?
13:53I was already wearing a new shirt.
13:58Because I misbehaved.
13:59Then,
14:00as if worried he might not believe me,
14:02I added,
14:06But I'm good now.
14:07What did you do?
14:09Roderick pushed,
14:10clearly unsatisfied with my answer.
14:14One of the counselors caught me
14:16after I dropped some food on the table.
14:18Roderick frowned but said nothing.
14:21I glanced at him nervously.
14:23After a long pause,
14:25Elsewhere.
14:26Where else did they hurt you?
14:28I shook my head.
14:30It's not like they chose to go for my back.
14:32I'd curl up into a ball,
14:33so my back was just the only part left exposed.
14:37It's getting late.
14:38You should go now.
14:39I didn't want to be in the same room as him.
14:41It felt suffocating.
14:42Besides,
14:44it was already dark outside.
14:46Oh, it's fine.
14:47I'll crash here for the night.
14:50Silence hung between us.
14:51I didn't argue.
14:53But I stayed awake long after the lights went out.
14:58I hadn't eaten since breakfast at his apartment.
15:01Using the groceries I'd picked up earlier,
15:04I whipped up a simple meal on the old hot plate.
15:07Thank God Grandpa never used gas otherwise.
15:10I'd have had nothing to eat.
15:12You're not at the center anymore.
15:14You don't have to eat so fast.
15:16Roderick's voice reached me as I hurried through the meal.
15:18But I was already finished,
15:20and Roderick had barely touched his food.
15:23Old habits die hard.
15:24Roderick took my bedroom,
15:26so I slept in Grandpa's old room.
15:28Late that night,
15:29my knee and back started throbbing.
15:31My head felt heavy and dizzy.
15:33When I opened my eyes again,
15:35I was staring at a white ceiling.
15:37The sharp smell of disinfectant was everywhere.
15:40I didn't have time to wonder how I'd gotten here.
15:42All I cared about was that I was gonna be late for my first shift.
15:46I tiptoed over to put on my shoes.
15:48Careful not to wake Roderick.
15:51Roderick's sleepy voice stopped me right as I was almost out the door.
15:55Where are you off to?
15:57I got a job.
15:58I'm gonna be late for work.
16:00Do you even know you're running a fever?
16:02He sounded annoyed.
16:03Was it because he'd had to pay for the medical bills?
16:07Don't worry, Mr. Dunlop.
16:10I'll pay you back as soon as I get my first paycheck.
16:12I gave him a quick, polite bow and slipped out the door.
16:17Thankfully, I made it to work just in time.
16:23It was Valentine's Day, and the flower shop was absolutely packed.
16:27My job was simple, just working the register.
16:30I didn't know how to do anything else yet.
16:32The shop was small, but the owner was amazing, and customers just kept coming in.
16:37But out of all the people who could have walked in, I never thought I'd see Chelsea Harvey.
16:43Arm in arm with Roderick, laughing and talking up a storm.
16:47Chelsea, the same girlfriend Roderick, had brought home all those years ago.
16:52Chels, Rod.
16:55The shop owner walked over to greet them politely.
16:58My mind went completely blank, and I froze in place.
17:02It turned out the owner was Chelsea's brother.
17:04My life was starting to feel like a bad soap opera all over again.
17:08I'd suffered for three years because of Chelsea.
17:11And now here I was, working for her brother.
17:14How pathetic was that?
17:22Chelsea spotted me, flinched in fake fear and buried her face in Roderick's chest.
17:29Cliffy, what is she doing here?
17:31She's, she's the one who-
17:33Chelsea pointed a shaking finger right at me.
17:35Clifford Harvey stared at me in shock, then his face twisted with disgust.
17:40He grabbed me by the arm and shoved me right out the door.
17:46It all happened so fast.
17:48I stumbled and crashed to the ground.
17:51Roderick just stood there and watched, cold as ice.
17:55Humiliated, I got up and ran all the way back to the old house.
18:00I locked myself in grandpa's room.
18:02It was the only place I ever felt safe.
18:08Thanks to that, I had to find a new job,
18:10and I had to pay back that $1,000 advance.
18:16I hated owing anyone anything.
18:21Job hunting sucked for days,
18:23until I finally got hired as a dishwasher.
18:26It was tiring, but it kept me busy, kept my mind off things.
18:31I thought maybe I could finally live a quiet life,
18:34but some people just couldn't stand to see me happy.
18:37Chelsea's shadow followed me wherever I went.
18:45The floor manager had told me to bring the clean dishes out to be sanitized.
18:56Well, look who it is.
18:58The Crawford Group Harris.
19:08As I walked through the dining area,
19:10a few girls blocked my way.
19:12Their voices thick with sarcasm.
19:15They were my old college classmates,
19:17also Chelsea's little minions.
19:19Chelsea was standing right behind them,
19:22watching it all go down no sign of her usual innocent act.
19:28I tried to ignore them and walk past.
19:31I didn't want any trouble.
19:32Did I say you could leave?
19:34Someone yanked my hair so hard,
19:35it sent a sharp pain shooting through my scalp.
19:38The noise set off a commotion.
19:42All I could think about was the plates.
19:45I'd have to pay for them.
19:47Roderick's voice cut through the noise from behind me.
19:49What's going on here?
19:51My hands,
19:52busy picking up the broken pieces,
19:54froles for a second.
19:56I cut my finger on a shard.
19:59It didn't even hurt.
20:00I knew something way worse was about to happen.
20:04Sure enough,
20:06I heard Chelsea's fake sweet voice complaining to Roderick.
20:09We were just trying to make up with Mari.
20:14Just catch up a little.
20:16But then she...
20:22Before Chelsea could finish,
20:23another girl cut in.
20:25But then she lost her temper
20:27and tried to hit Chels with a plate!
20:40I kept picking up the broken pieces calmly.
20:45I knew I was going to lose this job too.
20:47The floor manager rushed over
20:49and chewed me out.
20:50I do no count of oins.
20:51I'm chewed at the busting dunking!
20:53Munt!
20:53Nup!
20:54Test!
20:58I handed over almost all the cash I had on me.
21:02All but ten bucks.
21:05I'm sorry.
21:08I'm sorry.
21:15With my last ten bucks,
21:17I stopped at a pharmacy,
21:18then headed home.
21:21Back at the house,
21:22I went into Grandpa's room.
21:30Picked up his photo
21:31and held it tight.
21:35I'm sorry, Grandpa.
21:37I didn't turn out the way you hoped I would.
21:43You taught me that loving someone
21:45means having the courage to go for them.
21:47So you never regret it.
21:52But Grandpa,
21:53I'm so tired.
21:54I can't do this anymore.
21:55I'm giving up.
21:59What if I come to be with you instead?
22:05You're not saying no,
22:06so I'll take that as a yes.
22:11I downed all the sleeping pills
22:12I bought at the pharmacy.
22:14I downed all the sleeping pills
22:16I'd bought at the pharmacy.
22:22I was scared Roderick would use this
22:23as an excuse to send me back to that center.
22:27I couldn't live like that anymore.
22:29I couldn't find a single reason
22:31to keep going anymore.
22:33But sleeping pills
22:34were supposed to put you to sleep.
22:44Why did it hurt so much instead?
22:49A sharp cramp hit my stomach
22:51and I could feel my eyes starting to close.
22:55Right as my eyes closed for good,
22:57I thought I saw Roderick standing in the doorway.
23:07When is she going to wake up?
23:08She's been asleep for days.
23:10When I came to,
23:11it seemed I heard Roderick's voice.
23:22Why was he still clinging to me
23:24even after death?
23:31It wasn't until a team of doctors
23:32began examining me that I understood.
23:42Roderick had rushed me here
23:43to have my stomach pumped.
23:50I'd been given a second chance.
23:58That figure I saw hadn't been an illusion.
24:00It was him.
24:08Are you sending me back?
24:21The doctor says you may be suffering from depression.
24:27Roderick avoided my question.
24:31I nodded Dot,
24:32but that wasn't the point.
24:41All I cared about
24:42was whether I had to be sent back.
24:50Why didn't you tell me?
24:55Would you have believed me if I had?
25:00Telling him would only have made him think
25:02I was making excuses to leave that place.
25:14I had reached out to him.
25:17Each resident was granted
25:18a scheduled call to family twice a year.
25:28During my first six months,
25:30I called him once.
25:33I'm sick.
25:35I cough up blood sometimes
25:37and they hit us.
25:43Can I please come home?
25:51I promise I won't bother you anymore.
25:53What did he say back then?
25:57You come to...
25:59Find a better excuse next time.
26:04Then he hung up.
26:09After that call,
26:11I was beaten again.
26:14I never called him after that.
26:21Why did I cough up blood?
26:29Their blows had landed on my back,
26:31over and over.
26:32The internal damage eventually affected my stomach and lungs.
26:44Seeing Roderick fall silent,
26:46I knew he still didn't believe me.
26:48I lowered my head and didn't ask again whether he'd send me back.
26:53I moored me long,
26:54the fair and the sorry that we's out
26:55in sparing and disceveling functy.
26:57Should I be sent back,
26:58I won't leave alive.
27:03In a place like that,
27:05no one would notice whether a person was breathing.
27:08I thought once I got out,
27:10I could start over.
27:12But I was wrong.
27:14My peace was always shattered
27:15whenever Roderick came into the picture.
27:22The doctor called Roderick out,
27:24saying some test results were ready.
27:30The door swung open as Roderick strode back in.
27:41He yanked the blanket aside,
27:43then my hospital gown.
27:52An ugly, jaggy scar was exposed.
27:58Your kidney.
28:00Where is it?
28:05His eyes were bloodshot,
28:07a vein throbbing on his forehead
28:08as he stared at me.
28:15He looked terrifying,
28:17just like at the staff at the center.
28:20They had that same look in their eyes.
28:32That look always came right before a beating.
28:36I pulled the blanket up
28:37and hid underneath it.
28:46The bed shifted as Roderick sat down beside me.
28:51He gently tugged.
28:54He gently'd at the covers.
28:58Mary, come out.
29:00You'll suffocate.
29:04His voice softened,
29:06as if he'd realized he'd scared me.
29:12Promise you won't hit me?
29:21My voice was muffled under the blanket.
29:23Only after he promised did I poke my head.
29:35He asked again,
29:36patient this time.
29:38What happened to your kidney?
29:52Roderick took out his phone and said
29:54he would investigate this thoroughly.
29:57Ever since learning about my depression,
30:00Roderick had barely left my side.
30:03It was as if he was afraid I might try something again,
30:06but I saw that the rehab center
30:07had been shut down on television.
30:09No doubt it was Roderick's doing.
30:12It had posed as an educational institution.
30:15Behind closed doors,
30:17it ran vile operations.
30:18Did he do this to you, too?
30:21Roderick pointed at the screen.
30:24Mari Kambai, VO.
30:25The man being interviewed
30:27was the infamous director.
30:28He spoke excitedly to the reporter.
30:30I was helping.
30:32They should be thankful.
30:35Without my guidance.
30:37Do you think they'd be so compliant now?
30:40Go ask their parents.
30:42Their children are model citizens now,
30:45aren't they?
30:45I took a kidney as my fair compensation.
30:48My method was simple.
30:50Add something to their bedtime milk,
30:51then proceed with the removal.
30:53I'd watch them wake up in agony.
30:56The man grew more animated as he spoke.
30:58I felt a wave of dread seep into my bones.
31:03The bloody scene felt like it had happened yesterday.
31:06That night, I went to bed as usual.
31:09Before lights out,
31:10we all had to drink the milk the attenders brought.
31:12Refusal meant a beating.
31:15In my sleep,
31:16I felt like I was being restrained.
31:19Then, slowly,
31:20a sharp pain pierced my side.
31:26My eyes flew open to see the director's horrifying face
31:29leaning over me.
31:30It wasn't a dream.
31:31He was staring intently at my waist.
31:34The pain made me black out.
31:36I didn't wake until the next day.
31:41He threatened me.
31:43If I ever spoke a word,
31:44my other kidney would meet the same fate.
31:47No wonder so many people there moved stiffly,
31:49and no one ever said a thing.
31:51Mari!
31:53I stared at him,
31:54my gaze empty.
31:55Then,
31:56a mouthful of blood surged up and spilled over.
32:00I collapsed.
32:04I had no idea how long I was out.
32:09When I woke up,
32:10I was still connected to a ventilator.
32:14I shifted my fingers,
32:15trying to wake Roderick.
32:18His weight was resting on my hand,
32:20and it had gone numb.
32:26You're awake.
32:27How do you feel?
32:28You were in shock.
32:29Did you realize?
32:30But I was in shock.
32:31How would I know?
32:34But was this really Roderick?
32:38His jaw was shadowed with stubble.
32:40His eyes streaked with red.
32:43This wasn't the same cool collected man I remembered.
32:47I tried to speak,
32:48but had no strength left.
32:50I just lay still.
32:52Let the doctors and Roderick do what they needed to do.
32:56I learned I'd been unconscious for four days.
33:01Roderick had stayed by my side the whole time.
33:07That afternoon,
33:08a doctor removed the ventilator.
33:12I could talk again.
33:17What's the prognosis?
33:18Weeks?
33:18Months?
33:19I knew my time was running out.
33:22Roderick's hand,
33:23which had been holding a spoon to feed me broth,
33:25paused.
33:26After a long moment.
33:29Six months.
33:31Maybe less.
33:47Maybe less.
33:48even after I'd learned to behave and the beatings mostly stopped.
33:59I kept coughing up blood.
34:01The depression only made things worse.
34:08Roderick nodded.
34:12Can I get back to work?
34:15Can I get back to work?
34:16Is there any way you could keep your wife from interfering?
34:18If they'd just leave me alone,
34:20I could work in peace.
34:22I still owed Clifford $1,000 after all.
34:26She's not my wife.
34:28Roderick frowned,
34:29putting a clear distance between himself and Chelsea.
34:32I didn't care what Chelsea was.
34:35I just needed her to stay away.
34:40I started a small street stall on a decent block,
34:43selling burritos.
34:47I had planned to find a regular job,
34:49but Roderick forbade it.
34:54When he set his mind to something,
34:56no one could change it.
35:04He offered me two options.
35:07Start my own small business,
35:09or stay home.
35:13Doing something I chose with the time I had left
35:15was a good idea.
35:17I stood nervously behind my cart,
35:19worried no customers would come.
35:21The location was close to campus.
35:24Steady foot traffic from students and professionals.
35:27It was a fully licensed area for street vendors to operate.
35:36Best of all, it was close to Grandpa's house.
35:44Hey, how much for a burrito?
35:47I was lost in thought
35:48when a guy with a brighty smile
35:49walked up to my stall.
35:54I looked up and met his clear eyes.
35:56He had faint dimples,
35:57wearing a basketball jersey,
35:59a ball in his hand,
36:00as if he'd just come from a game.
36:02I was caught off guard for a second.
36:06He spoke again before I came out of my trance.
36:08For some reason,
36:10looking into his eyes
36:11didn't make me uneasy at all.
36:13Usually,
36:14any eye contact filled me with dread.
36:17So many pairs of eyes haunted my nights.
36:26Would you like to try one?
36:27It's free.
36:28Why free?
36:29Is it because I'm so good looking?
36:31He grinned and rubbed his chin playfully.
36:34His playful tone made my face grow warm.
36:37No, it's my first day.
36:39If it turns out unpasteable,
36:41I couldn't possibly take your money.
36:45I'd practiced at home over and over,
36:47but doing it for real felt completely different.
36:52Oh, so I'm your gimme pee pig.
36:56No!
36:58I thought I'd scared him off.
36:59Just kidding.
37:00Go ahead.
37:01I'll eat it however it turns out.
37:02He laughed warmly.
37:04Most vendors could make one in three to five minutes.
37:07My clumsy attempt took nearly seven.
37:09The outside was crispy,
37:11though not burnt.
37:12Maybe I should make you another one?
37:15He took the wrapped burrito and bit into it.
37:18This is perfect.
37:22It's great.
37:23Seriously,
37:24this is how it should be.
37:25Nice and crispy.
37:27His compliment made me smile.
37:29So,
37:30how much?
37:31You're not going to charge me an arm and a leg, are you?
37:33No.
37:34He widened his eyes in alarm.
37:35This one's complimentary.
37:36A lucky start for my first day.
37:39I'm Leonard Williams, by the way.
37:41As he turned to leave,
37:42he glanced back and waved.
37:44I watched him walk away.
37:45It struck me then how distant my own college days felt.
37:49If I hadn't been so reckless back then,
37:51I would have graduated a year ago.
37:57As the day went on,
37:59more customers came.
38:05I was almost too busy to keep up.
38:08But I got quicker and more confident with each one.
38:13I didn't pack up until I'd run out of ingredients.
38:22I'll drive you home.
38:22Roderick pulled up beside me in his car.
38:25It's fine.
38:25I have my scooter.
38:27I nodded toward my scooter parked out nearby.
38:31It's getting chilly tonight.
38:33You'll catch a cold.
38:34I won't die from it.
38:42Marianne,
38:42how long are you going to keep fighting me on everything?
38:46Roderick caught my wrist as I started to walk away.
38:50Mr. Dunlop,
38:51do not forget.
38:57I was the one who pushed your girlfriend down the stairs.
39:04I'm the one to blame.
39:12In that moment,
39:13to cut any last tie between us,
39:16I claimed the guilt.
39:19Mary stopped lying.
39:20I know the truth now.
39:22She fell on her own.
39:25Suddenly,
39:25his arms came around me from behind.
39:30Hadn't he told me to protect Chelsea?
39:36So you were protecting her?
39:38While I bore all the blame?
39:43No.
39:45I was afraid once you knew the truth,
39:47you'd hate me for not believing you sooner.
39:50I was wrong.
39:52I'm sorry.
39:54I'm sorry.
39:59His arms tightened around me.
40:02I only found out two days ago.
40:05I went to Chelsea to stay away from you.
40:08And we argued.
40:11She let it slip.
40:14I could no longer hold back my tears.
40:18They fell onto the back of his hand.
40:21At least I would clear my name before I died.
40:23Don't cry, Mari.
40:26He released me,
40:27bending down to wipe my tears.
40:31I sobbed uncontrollably in his arms.
40:38For a moment,
40:39neither of us spoke.
40:41Three years of silence.
40:44Three years of pain I'd swallowed without a word.
40:46And now,
40:47finally,
40:48someone believed me.
40:54Rod.
40:56Here.
40:57I pointed to my chest.
40:59It doesn't beat for you anymore.
41:04Rod,
41:04if I could,
41:05I'd wish we had never met.
41:08I wiped my tears
41:09and gave a faint smile.
41:12This is the last time I'll call you that.
41:16From now on,
41:16let's each live our own lives.
41:20I'd treat this as a goodbye.
41:21A proper end to those eight years I spent loving him.
41:28I could never forget the three years in that place.
41:32And the person who'd sent me there was Roderick himself.
41:37Mary.
41:41He reached for me,
41:42but I stepped back.
41:43Mr. Dunlap,
41:44please don't disturb me again.
41:48I want my remaining time
41:51to be peaceful.
41:54With that,
41:55I left.
41:56I drove my scooter home.
41:59Roderick's car followed at a distance
42:01in the rearview mirror.
42:04I ignored him.
42:07I went to my stall
42:09as usual every day.
42:15Roderick watched from a distance.
42:18I just ignored him.
42:24Hey, I'm back.
42:25Brought my classmates to try your burritos.
42:28It was Leonard,
42:29my first customer.
42:33I glanced at the two boys behind him
42:35and gave a slight nod in greeting.
42:37What kind would you like?
42:38A real sense of ease washed over me.
42:41Something I hadn't felt in a long time.
42:43Whatever you recommend.
42:53Maybe one of each?
42:54I'll take some back
42:55for my roommates too.
42:57One of his buddies said,
42:58eyeing the ingredients.
43:01So, how much?
43:03You didn't let me pay last time.
43:04You've got to charge me today
43:05or I won't come back.
43:08I hadn't said I wouldn't charge him.
43:11I still needed to pay back my debt.
43:13Six dollars each.
43:16Cash only though.
43:17If you don't have any,
43:18you can get change
43:18at the store down the block.
43:21I pointed to the sign on my cart
43:23and then toward the store
43:24down the block.
43:27Wait right here.
43:28I'll be back.
43:29I watched Leonard walk away inside.
43:32The young seemed so full of life.
43:34It was easy to forget
43:35I was only a year older than him.
43:37Yet my life felt worlds apart.
43:43Hey, isn't he good looking?
43:45And he's single.
43:46Maybe give him a shot?
43:48His classmates clearly thought
43:49my glance at Leonard
43:50meant more than it did.
43:51I shook my head
43:52and stayed silent.
43:54I was making around
43:55three to four hundred dollars a day.
44:01Soon,
44:02I had enough to repay my debt.
44:04Clifford seemed to have been
44:05waiting for me.
44:07He looked different.
44:09Guilty, almost.
44:11I heard what really happened.
44:14Chelsea admitted the truth to Roderick.
44:17I'm sorry for what I did to you.
44:19I didn't reply.
44:22I placed the money on the counter
44:23and left.
44:29Finally,
44:30I was free of that burden.
44:32Why did Leonard keep coming to my stall?
44:35Did he really love burritos that much?
44:40Do you really like burritos that much?
44:42I finally asked.
44:44No.
44:45Why?
44:46Taking another bite.
44:49Why do you come every day?
44:52Were you short on money for meals?
44:56But he didn't look like he was struggling.
44:59Because you're here.
45:01Between bites,
45:02I didn't fully process his words.
45:04Not until he swallowed,
45:06leaned closer,
45:07and looked at me seriously.
45:09Be my girlfriend?
45:13I froze for a second,
45:15then shook my head.
45:16I took his hand
45:17and placed it on my waist.
45:20I'm missing a kidney here.
45:23I have lung cancer here.
45:26He shrugged,
45:27unfazed.
45:28I know.
45:29I've always known.
45:31How could he know,
45:32reading my surprise?
45:35I'll tell you later.
45:37His hand lingered gently on my waist.
45:39Did it hurt?
45:41My eyes stung.
45:43No one had ever asked me that before.
45:46Not Roderick.
45:47Not my parents.
45:49Not a single person in three years.
45:55But this young man did.
45:58Six months later,
46:00I held the medical record the doctor had just given me.
46:04He said the cancer cells were gradually receding.
46:09Leonard had made sure I ate three meals a day.
46:12He walked me to every checkup.
46:17For the first time in years,
46:19I wanted to live,
46:20and it showed.
46:23With a positive mindset,
46:25consistent medication,
46:26and no late-night depressive episodes,
46:30full recovery was possible.
46:34There were cases of people beating cancer.
46:38It just wasn't easy.
46:45But I had managed it.
46:50Hey, where are you?
46:52You're not at your stall today.
46:54My phone buzzed with a message from Leonard.
46:56He'd bought me this phone himself.
46:59He'd claimed it was a buy one, get one deal.
47:02That he had an extra,
47:04and if I didn't take it,
47:05he'd throw it away.
47:06Who believed that?
47:08I certainly didn't.
47:11At the hospital.
47:18Half an hour later,
47:20Leonard came jobbing toward me
47:21in his basketball jersey.
47:26What did the doctor say?
47:29I put on a somber face,
47:31pretending to be downcast.
47:33I saw his expression dim,
47:34but he kept his voice steady.
47:38It's okay.
47:40I'll be with you every step of the way.
47:44I cut him off.
47:45Just kidding.
47:45The doctor says I'm doing really well.
47:50I couldn't bear to tease him for long.
47:55You've gotten mean.
47:57He pretended to be upset,
47:59but then he picked me up
48:00and spun me around twice.
48:09So, does this mean you'll say yes?
48:12He looked at me eagerly.
48:14Say yes to what?
48:17Interest at him playfully.
48:18Be my girlfriend.
48:20But I'm not completely healed yet.
48:22What if it comes back?
48:24I don't care.
48:28My job is to love you and make you happy.
48:33If you're happy, you'll get better.
48:35He hugged me tightly,
48:37nuzzling against me.
48:40All right, I suppose I'll say yes.
48:44All right, I suppose I'll say yes.
48:45I wrapped my arms around him in return.
48:48I sounded as if I was doing him a favor.
48:52The truth was,
48:53he had been the one settling for me all along.
48:59As Leonard and I walked away hand in hand,
49:01I saw Roderick.
49:07I hadn't seen him.
49:09I hadn't seen him in two or three months.
49:11He stood watching us,
49:13his eyes red.
49:19He'd pick me up to attend the service,
49:21and that was it.
49:22I'd also repaid him for all the medical bills.
49:25Even the money for the food cart.
49:29I knew he'd been watching me from a distance.
49:34He'd tried to approach me a few times.
49:41But I'd threatened to harm myself each time,
49:43and he'd finally stayed away.
49:49Mari, who is this?
49:51His eyes were still red.
49:53He already knew the answer.
49:58My girlfriend.
49:59Leonard answered first,
50:01raising our joined hands.
50:05Is he good to you?
50:07Yes.
50:12I know what it looks like
50:13when you love someone, Mari.
50:16And I can see it's not me anymore.
50:19Took me a while to face it.
50:24Be happy.
50:26I wish you the same.
50:28He turned and walked away.
50:32I didn't look back.
50:34Some people are meant to be part of your story,
50:36but not your ending.
50:39I heard later that Roderick left to teach
50:41in a remote mountain.
50:44As for me,
50:45I was curled on the sofa,
50:46looking at the man in front of me.
50:48You said before that
50:50you knew about my health.
50:52How?
50:55I sprained my ankle during a game
50:57and ended up in the hospital.
51:01I was in the room next to yours.
51:03I overheard something while walking by,
51:05got curious,
51:05and looked through the glass.
51:11One look,
51:12and I just knew.
51:13He made it sound so casual.
51:15That's it?
51:16I didn't buy it.
51:18Your classmates mentioned something.
51:21My photo is your computer wallpaper,
51:23the one from when I was a sophomore.
51:25I meant the guys who had stopped by my stall
51:27for burritos.
51:29Sure enough,
51:30Leonard looked briefly embarrassed.
51:35He was probably cursing them in his head.
51:39Okay, fine.
51:42I was an exchange student
51:43at your university in my freshman year,
51:46doing a photography project.
51:48You were there that day,
51:50so full of life.
51:51I couldn't help but take a picture.
51:53Later,
51:54I heard you were with Roderick,
51:56so I kept my distance.
51:58I don't do home wrecking.
52:00He lifted his chin slightly.
52:02It wasn't until I saw you in the hospital
52:04that I realized how stupid I'd been all along.
52:07If I had stepped in back then,
52:09maybe none of this would have happened to you.
52:12After that,
52:13I kept an eye on you,
52:14waiting until the day I ran into you at your stall.
52:16He looked genuinely regortful.
52:18I reached out and hugged him.
52:22Don't blame yourself.
52:23Some things were meant to happen.
52:25It wasn't your fault.
52:26I'd almost missed the chance
52:28to be with someone so wonderful.
52:29But in the end,
52:30nothing was too late.
52:31Other people go to rehab for drugs,
52:34alcohol,
52:34or gambling.
52:35I went to quit loving a man.
52:38In the end,
52:39I didn't just quit him.
52:41I learned to love myself again.
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