- 6 hours ago
Death Valley-Season 1 Episode 3
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Short filmTranscript
00:07Hi, I'm Brandi Stevenson, reporting from Sherman Oaks.
00:10It's National Blood Donor Month, and as some of you know, we have a severe blood shortage
00:15right here in our very own San Fernando Valley.
00:18How's the response been so far?
00:20Just great, Brandi.
00:21In fact, we've got three donors inside the blood mobile right now, but we've saved the
00:25spot just for you if you think you're ready.
00:28I am ready.
00:29Let's do it.
00:31That wasn't so bad, was it?
00:33No.
00:34Okay.
00:35Now, squeeze this a few times, and we'll have you out of here in just a couple minutes.
00:38Oh, my God!
00:41Oh, my God!
00:44Oh, my God!
00:46Oh, my God!
00:48Oh, my God!
00:49Oh, my God!
00:49Oh, my God!
00:50What's going on?
00:51One year ago, vampires, werewolves, and zombies descended upon California's San Fernando Valley.
00:57크 игра in the ground a couple of times, and people sang for blood andonden from high
01:26rivals.
01:27Oh, my God!
01:27Oh, my God!
01:27mile radius of this station and before we go after the vamps that i am sure did it i want
01:33to locate and
01:33secure said bloodmobile so the public knows it is safe to donate is something funny about this
01:39situation johnson no sir and why are you smiling that's my natural expression sir fair enough
01:46got your whole life ahead of you why wouldn't you smile huh i look in the mirror and all i
01:50see is a grizzled veteran with smoldering brown eyes and a hero's jawline either way people it
01:56is on us to address the shortage of blood in this valley do you understand me i actually uh gave
02:02today there's a lolly in my desk meanwhile stubeck pierce johnson rinaldi you join me at the blood
02:10mobiles the rest of you let's go out there and kill something let's do it hey captain um is there
02:18anything that i can do to help officer lander i have a special assignment for you i have a niece
02:22named natalie she goes to high school in north hollywood her mother my sister seems concerned
02:27about her specifically about some kind of a party that's happening tonight she keeps talking about
02:31on her facebook gbgb you have any idea what that could mean uh get beer get beers get banged green
02:38bananas gary bucey i want you to get into your civvies i want you to go to that party and
02:43i want you to find
02:43out what natalie's up to um so i i joined the utf to fight a monster epidemic and you're sending
02:49me to
02:49babysit your niece babies don't post stuff on their facebook page about making out with the head
02:54cheerleader just to titillate a bunch of teenage hormonal boys is that what she said she's gonna
02:58do i have no idea well with all due respect captain what does this have to do with work well
03:04let's see
03:05you're a rookie and you work for me any more questions officer landry
03:18so captain daschle i see that you have your troops out here in full force this evening that's correct
03:23in fact that two of my officers are in there right now donating blood that's wonderful oh and you are
03:29i'm officer billy pierce and i just want to say you look you look even more lovely in person than
03:33you do
03:34on tv well thank you but this is actually my first time on air i watch you all the time
03:38and
03:39i love what you do with that super lotto i believe you're thinking of brandy stevenson and
03:44she's no longer with us i'm a big fan all right you are thinking of brandy stevenson she's the one
03:50that died in the blood mobile you're hitting on a dead woman right now can you guys fix this in
03:56post
03:57yeah yeah when you do that in post he's young do you want to interview do you want to ask
04:00me
04:00any more questions no i'm pretty much done thank you stubek billy you guys are up uh we already gave
04:05sir give again come on stubek you're a big guy you ought to be giving more than anybody uh captain
04:10you understand that's not really how blood works excuse me rinaldi i spent enough time in combat
04:16i've seen pretty much every episode of greatest anatomy i think i know a little something about blood
04:19okay hang on okay they located the hijacked blood mobiles i want you guys there asap you see any
04:27vampires you shoot to kill but i didn't give my kind of bunch of cookies the nurse said like no
04:32strenuous activity for six eight hours huh oh uh hold on uh it's the vampires apparently they're not
04:39taking a six to eight hour break darn the luck now go out there and find out who hijacked my
04:45blood mobiles
04:52now man i am hungry you hungry here john john dash will get me two of them what's this man
04:59what flavor is this what does it look like red
05:06thanks man this is cool i mean i'm in pretty good shape you know what i mean but it still
05:10takes a lot
05:11out of a man when he gets blood i'm just saying why do you always tell me you're in good
05:15shape
05:16do i yeah kind of i mean come on i see you every day i know you're in good shape
05:21oh so you uh
05:24you noticed yes john john you have a nice body thank you now is there something you want to say
05:32to me
05:34thank you for noticing i have a nice body
05:36oh you look at that being a beauty man i love my job john john come on there's probably vampires
05:57in
05:57there what what you want me to get the of gun you mean the uv gun i know how to
06:02spell it carla fine
06:03yo where's billy yeah he's been snoozing since we gave blood oh i don't blame him i mean giving
06:09blood takes a lot out of somebody look at me i mean i'm pretty good shit damn i do say
06:14that a lot
06:14don't i well you take care of your body that's to be commended me i have subcutaneous fat so getting
06:19that v-shape is basically out of the question i've been doing this great workout you know the p90x
06:23you guys want to kill some monsters or should we just hang out and talk about our bodies
06:30this could be a setup everybody very very careful getting inside these things i got your back go ahead
06:44baby you good
06:58you see that's why i wanted my bat a gun doesn't work on zombies
07:05nice shot
07:38no no no no no no
07:40you
07:56I'll leave John John, cover the blood mobiles, we're in pursuit of a vamp.
08:02Time out, I've called time.
08:06Woo, time out.
08:08Oh, time out.
08:10She's not going to stop because you called time out, Stu.
08:13You slept in the car.
08:15I power napped.
08:16Well, then power run after her, and I'll stay here in case she doubles back.
08:21You know what, I'm not going to leave my partner.
08:23Can you do that for me?
08:25Actually, I'm pretty tired.
08:27Stubax Pierce, please return code 3.
08:30Officer Rinaldi and Johnson, I need immediate backup.
08:3310-4, now we've got to walk all the way back.
08:36Why don't we drive?
08:38You know, that's what I love about New York.
08:41You need a cab, and boom, it's right there.
08:43You know, I used to drive a cab.
08:45Did you really?
08:46Uh-huh.
08:46Drove a cab for two years in Minneapolis.
08:48You know what, there's not one part of that sense that I envy.
08:51Oh.
08:51But you look like a guy who could drive a cab.
08:53What does that mean?
08:54How do I look like a guy that would drive a cab?
08:56Explain that to me.
08:58Jesus!
08:59Whoa, that was close.
09:02Yeah.
09:09He's so serious, gorgeous.
09:11Great.
09:13Pretty.
09:13He's so serious.
09:16I'm coming for you.
09:17What the hell?
09:18And you mis-a-one?
09:22I'm coming for you.
09:24And you're right there.
09:24I'm coming, coming, coming, yeah.
09:26I just didn't sleep like a honey.
09:30I'm coming for you.
09:31I'm coming, coming, coming, yeah.
09:34Get out.
09:35Get out.
09:36Get out.
09:37Get out.
09:38Get out.
09:39Get out.
09:39Get out.
09:40Get out.
09:45Jesus, what's with all the zombies?
09:47There's a whole lot of them out there, damn.
09:49Where the hell are they coming from?
09:52Bitch.
09:53John, John?
09:54Yeah, yeah.
09:54Look.
09:55I'm one.
09:56All right.
09:58Okay.
09:59Whoever kills more zombies buys breakfast.
10:02You mean gets a free breakfast?
10:03No, I'm saying I want to buy you breakfast.
10:05That's very sweet of you.
10:06You're welcome.
10:06Me?
10:08Yes, pal, left.
10:09What are you doing?
10:10What's that matter, baby?
10:11Don't worry, baby.
10:11I got you.
10:12I got you.
10:14Damn it.
10:15Where's the ammo?
10:17In the car.
10:18See, the bat never runs out of ammo.
10:19What?
10:24No bat, no gun, no ammo.
10:27No.
10:35Hey, did you work at Subway?
10:38Because you just gave me a footlong.
10:41Oh, classy.
10:44Chad, why are you such a wiener?
10:49Thanks for that.
10:50It's my first time here.
10:52I'm Amber, by the way.
10:54Hey, Natalie.
10:55So, um, who'd you come with?
10:58Oh, some guy that I met at a club, but I don't see him.
11:04You know Rico, though, right?
11:06Oh, yeah, yeah.
11:07Um, you mean, um...
11:09It's Rico's house.
11:10Oh, no.
11:11Yeah, I know.
11:12Don't worry, though.
11:12Rico is gonna love you.
11:16What's going on over there?
11:18Oh, okay.
11:20Well, she just gave blood.
11:23And Rico just gave her a black kiss.
11:28It's a nice little buzz from his saliva.
11:32There's something in his saliva?
11:33Yeah, every vampire has it.
11:35I hear it tastes like Jaeger.
11:38You know, give blood, get buzzed.
11:41Give blood, get buzzed.
11:44If you give blood first, it's supposed to make the buzz a lot more intense.
11:48Are you sure it's okay to be drinking that?
11:52Oh, my God.
11:53You sound just like my mom.
11:55Don't worry, Mom.
11:56I haven't tried it yet.
12:01I know you.
12:04I don't know you.
12:06Amber.
12:08Hey, Amber.
12:10I'm Rico.
12:11Welcome to my den of inequity.
12:16I'm kidding.
12:18Mostly.
12:19But, the ladies need to officially join the party.
12:24Okay.
12:32You probably really had two men, right?
12:34Yeah, what the hell happened to them?
12:35How do you guys run out of ammo?
12:37Don't you have, like, extra ammo just in case?
12:38Hey, just shut up.
12:40Hey, Carla.
12:41Remember when we were talking about half his sex
12:42and we were about to die?
12:43Hey, you talked about him.
12:46Oh, yeah, my bad.
12:49Peace.
12:56Who's the hero now, huh?
12:57You get us out of here.
12:58I just want to reconsider.
13:00Hey, I'll do man stuff with you.
13:02Whatever.
13:16I'll...
13:17Okay.
13:17Okay.
13:18We got to get up.
13:19We got to get up.
13:21We got to...
13:29We got to get up.
13:30What are you doing?
13:31No, no, what?
13:32It's Brew Punch.
13:34It's Brew Punch?
13:34Really?
13:35Look.
13:36It's a bunch of cookies.
13:41Thanks, man.
13:42Yeah, yeah, yeah.
13:43I got it.
13:54Did you see the breeze that came out of that?
13:56Yeah.
13:58All right, let's go.
13:59Come on.
13:59Chop, chop.
14:00Lift me up.
14:01Help her out, Kevin.
14:01One, two, three.
14:04Go, go, go, go.
14:10Hey, I think you've been in Stubak.
14:12Stubak, Pierce, we need ammo.
14:14Repeat, we need ammo.
14:16Ten-four, we're on our way.
14:19Are you eating something?
14:21Cookie.
14:22Save us cookies.
14:23We'll get you ammo.
14:32We'll get you ammo.
15:14Good girl.
15:17I'm not sure if I'm ready.
15:20Then why are you here?
15:25Why are you here, Amber?
15:28Come on.
15:29It's not like it's going to kill you or anything.
15:35Hmm.
15:50You're welcome here any time, Amber.
16:02I figured you'd come around.
16:10Nice.
16:12Night-night.
16:27Why are we throwing them ammo?
16:28I mean, why don't we just start shooting them?
16:29Because Carla's inside the blood mobile, and I won't be responsible for you missing a zombie
16:33and taking that woman's head off.
16:34Well, then you know what?
16:35I should throw them, because I was the quarterback of my high school football team.
16:38Oh, yeah?
16:38Varsity?
16:39JV.
16:40Mm-hmm.
16:40That being said, I went to the same high school as Matthew McConaughey.
16:43What does that mean?
16:44I was a catcher on the baseball team.
16:46Varsity.
16:47Oh, really?
16:48Catcher?
16:48Mm-hmm.
16:49Is that because you had a good arm or because you're a big guy?
16:51Dammit, Billy.
16:52I am very comfortable at this weight.
16:53I'm an attractor.
16:54No, what the f***?
16:56Ow!
16:59That's off.
17:00Seriously?
17:01Nice work, JV.
17:02Give me that.
17:08That'll do it.
17:11Animal!
17:12Cookie!
17:13Hey, great mind.
17:14Yeah.
17:20Oh!
17:20Boom.
17:21Coming hot.
17:28Nice one.
17:29He would have been out at second on that.
17:30Absolutely.
17:36Oh!
17:37Oh!
17:39He is a good marksman, Carla.
17:41Well, you know about accuracy.
17:43Burn!
17:44Got him.
17:44I'm winning.
17:55Oh, Sir Landry.
17:57Where are you going?
17:58You look all dolled up.
18:00Uh, you made me follow your niece to a party?
18:06Yes.
18:07Yes, I did.
18:09You know how long it's been since I've been to a party?
18:12Wednesday.
18:13Last Wednesday.
18:14Anyway, did you find anything about my niece I should worry about?
18:17Your niece seems really sweet, Captain.
18:19Listen, I do think that her group of friends might be starting to get into a little bit of trouble.
18:26What kind of trouble?
18:27She's into some crazy crap.
18:28I want to put somebody with experience on the case.
18:32You know, I think that it's just the normal teenage stuff.
18:38Parties, boys, some drinking.
18:42Nothing too serious.
18:44But, uh, if you want, I mean, I could try to find out more.
18:48You can never be too safe with kids, right?
18:51I think that's a good idea.
18:53And you have the appropriate outfits?
18:56Uh, I mean, just to blend in?
18:58Tube tops, short shorts, navel ring, that kind of stuff?
19:01I have outfits.
19:03Yes.
19:04Excellent.
19:04Very good.
19:06Wow, look at this.
19:08I see you gave blood.
19:09Well done, Grissin.
19:10Oh.
19:11I might just do the same exact thing tomorrow morning.
19:14Such a giver, Captain.
19:16Ha ha.
19:17Oh, it's just a little prick.
19:19That's all.
19:24How's it going down there?
19:25My blood good?
19:25Everything coming out the way you want it?
19:26You're doing great.
19:28Just relax.
19:28I am relaxed.
19:29You relax.
19:30I'm very relaxed.
19:31I've done this many, many, many times.
19:34You're almost done.
19:35Almost done?
19:35I just sat down like, holy crap, my blood's coming out fast.
19:38Is that normal?
19:39It's absolutely normal.
19:40Okay.
19:41You, sir, are good to go.
19:46Okay.
19:47Happy to do my part, man.
19:50It's important to be a giver.
19:51Look what I got for you.
19:54Oh, animal crackers.
19:56Ha ha.
19:57Some things just make you feel young again, you know?
20:00I know exactly what you mean.
20:07This is so good.
20:09My mom used to feed us jerky.
20:11Jerky and sometimes peanuts, because we're never allowed to have crackers.
20:15Cookie.
20:19That's something to panic, huh?
20:24I'm shooting a porn movie in here.
20:27Unfortunately, I was in the bathroom masturbating the whole time.
20:29Excuse me?
20:30We're coming up on a full moon.
20:31I just need to make sure that you're in compliance.
20:33Yes, yes.
20:36Escaped, officer.
20:37Freeze!
20:38There's nothing going on out here.
20:42That's how he kicks a wolf ass.
20:44Honey, stop it.
20:45One of these days.
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