00:01the word suicide is like somebody just whipped out a gun I mean it's just like
00:09don't say the word I knew there was something wrong with me weird things like from sitting
00:16position to a standing position I could just fall flat over it's like I don't have legs
00:22FTD is a form of dementia that affects a person's personality their behavior ten years ago
00:29I talked to my mom almost every day on the phone and we would have long conversations she was just
00:35a lot different than she is now two to seven years is the average lifespan with this diagnosis I'm
00:43sorry but I just feel like you don't get to choose when you leave that's God's choice your life has
00:49a
00:49whole plan the reason for the particular month was July 4th is Independence Day why is that not
00:59part of the discussion I don't think it have to be tragic but I also don't want to be laying
01:07in a
01:07bed and they think I'm comatose and I'm hearing I'm going is she almost dead I've come to learn how
01:19others see this progression that sometimes I'm not even as aware of since the disease she's babbling
01:30she's losing the ability to do all these things yet she is not slipping up in the advocacy department
01:36she's still doing so much it's the not knowing how long will I be able to make choices that are
01:44my
01:45decisions it's a very solitary road and it frightens me I've never died before this isn't about me so deeper
02:01than Susan Susan is nothing that if I'm not here mortally I hope by experience you share it with someone
02:15else so that you can say oh I know all about that I met this chick and she never shut
02:24up
02:24you
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