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FunTranscript
00:04sorry I what's got you so focused you forgot how to walk get back I give it
00:12back beg me get off me nerd
00:27don't laugh shut the hell up
00:39go pick that ball up or I'm gonna make you regret it
00:49let him go oh come on Marcus you mess with him every day now you're playing hero
00:56only I get to bully him
01:01touch him again and I'll twist your head off and use it as a soccer ball
01:07you okay mind your own business he's right this is all your fault and now you're acting
01:12like some hero Marcus listen to me the person I hate most in this world is you
01:22Lucas I bully you because I fucking like you
01:31Lucas you're home I made you your favorite hot cocoa
01:35spare me the fake nice I know what you're doing
01:38you you know you're trying to win me over but let me make this clear you will
01:43never be the lady of this house
01:48what the hell is that were you trying to poison me
01:58your father won't marry me because of you if you're alive I'll never inherit his
02:03fortune so I have to get rid of you if my dad finds out you tried to hurt me
02:08he'll never marry a psycho like you too bad you won't get the chance to tell him die
02:21Marcus what are you doing here I came down the chimney Lucas I need to explain why I mess
02:26with you
02:42let go of me
02:56Okay, either I'm dead, or I blacked out at a renaissance fair.
03:00What are you, a flying paper cut?
03:02Ah, our Prince Charming is finally awake!
03:04I am the Guardian Sprite of Fairy Tales.
03:06You awakened me, so I brought you into this storybook.
03:13Oh my god, I look like a rejected Disney extra.
03:17Why am I dressed like Prince Chanham's cousin who sells essential oils?
03:21How can I leave this ridiculous place?
03:25Your Highness, the King commands you to depart at once to marry the Princess Snow White of the neighboring kingdom.
03:30Snow White?
03:31Absolutely not. I'm gay.
03:33I'm not about to drag some innocent girl into a straight marriage starter pack.
03:37That's emotional terrorism.
03:40You have got to be kidding me.
03:43Good morning, Princess Snow White. Sleep well?
03:46I'm a guy. Do you see the stubble? The Adam's apple? The entire male anatomy-gy package?
03:51Hmm, yeah, that's not supposed to happen.
03:54Okay, looks like we've got a role assignment error.
03:58Let me file a ticket with fairy tale tech support.
04:01Oh great, so how long is the wait time? Three business entries?
04:05Why won't this thing come off? I want men's clothes, pants, a hoodie, literally anything with sleeves that aren't made
04:11in.
04:11Can't. Your character is Snow White. Snow White has a dress. It's in the contract.
04:16I never signed anything.
04:18You did? You just didn't read the terms and conditions, like everyone else.
04:22Look, you've got unlimited dresses. Fresh options daily. It's basically Princess Netflix.
04:28Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! No! No, no, no! Stop!
04:33Alright. Ready to meet your Prince Charming? He'll be here soon to marry you!
04:39What? I'm straight. I don't like men. Tell me how to get out of this nightmare.
04:42Easy. You just have to truly fall in love with Prince Charming.
04:46You're insane.
04:49Accept reality, your highness. This is the only way you can return to the real world.
04:53Fall in love with a man? I'd rather be trapped here forever.
04:57Princess Snow White, you inherited your father's heroic masculinity.
05:03Ahem. Princess, the queen requests your presence.
05:07Mmm. What is it?
05:11Oh! My God! Lucas, you're Snow White?
05:15This is amazing!
05:17The evil queen? Yeah, that tracks.
05:20You're dressed like a walking jewelry store, afraid people might miss how greedy you are?
05:25Oh, my dear Lucas. In here, I'm the queen. I have everything.
05:30And honestly, I'm in love with this place.
05:34And you are the key back to reality.
05:37So if I want to stay here, I'll have to kill you.
05:42You're sure he's the coldest killer in the kingdom?
05:46Yes, your majesty.
05:48He's the infamous hunter nicknamed Mr. Alpha Male.
05:52I hate women, especially women prettier than me.
05:55So Snow White, the most beautiful, cannot be allowed to live.
06:02Leave your Snow White to me.
06:15Die, Snow White.
06:19Except...
06:21Snow White is a man?
06:23A man and he's hot?
06:28Who the hell are you?
06:30I'm your secret lover.
06:34Snow White's taste is a felony.
06:36I get it. You're the queen's assassin.
06:38She sent you to kill me.
06:40She told me to eliminate you.
06:42She just forgot to mention you're a man.
06:44And exactly my type.
06:47I've changed my mind.
06:49A face like yours, I couldn't possibly pull the trigger.
06:54You don't come any closer.
06:56The entire palace is under the queen's control.
06:59She won't stop until you're dead.
07:01But I can protect you.
07:03Whether you come with me is your choice.
07:05You protect me?
07:07That's right.
07:08I'm the coldest killer alive.
07:11Mr. Alpha Male.
07:12He actually let that little trash escape issue a kingdom-wide manhunt now.
07:20A princess with an atom zappel.
07:21Chest hair shouldn't be hard to spot.
07:25For the last time, I am not marrying Snow White.
07:28I only want Lucas.
07:29Your Highness, bad news.
07:31Snow White has gone missing.
07:33Missing?
07:34Perfect.
07:35This Snow White has a suspicious amount of testosterone.
07:38Wait, Snow White is Lucas?
07:45I-I can't run anymore.
07:51Hide!
07:54I'll go distract them.
07:56You head east and find your fiancé, Prince Charming.
07:59He will protect you.
08:01But what about you?
08:02Don't worry.
08:03I'm a Mr. Alpha Male.
08:05A few guards can't hurt me.
08:07Remember, never enter the Enchanted Forest.
08:10There are seven total psychos in there.
08:12Nobody who goes in ever makes it out alive.
08:18Damn.
08:20He's handsome.
08:20Too bad he doesn't like men.
08:23Wait.
08:23Does he actually like men or not?
08:26Hey!
08:27You ugly freaks!
08:28Come and catch me!
08:32Get him!
08:33Damn this dress!
08:35Damn the Queen!
08:36Damn this fairy tale!
08:42Princess Snow White.
08:44Her Majesty requests your return to the palace.
08:47And what if I say no?
08:49Then you'll suffer a little.
08:55Marcus!
08:56Marcus!
08:56What the hell is this jerk doing here?
08:58As long as I'm here, nobody can lay a finger on him.
09:02Someone thinks a little too highly of themselves.
09:09What are you doing?
09:11Stop it!
09:12The unstoppable secret technique!
09:14Tickle attack!
09:23Are you okay?
09:25You're wearing a prince's uniform.
09:28You're Prince Charming?
09:31No, no, no!
09:32If you're Prince Charming, I'd rather die or stuck here forever!
09:36Lucas still hates me.
09:37I should hide my identity for now and give him time.
09:41I'm not...
09:43I'm not Prince Charming.
09:45I'm his half-brother, Prince Charging.
09:48Prince...
09:48Prince Charging?
09:50What the hell is that?
09:51Look!
09:52Bright enough to light a whole kingdom.
09:54That's why they call me Prince Charging.
09:57Even your horse looks gay as hell.
10:01I'm heading to find my brother, Prince Charming.
10:04Why don't we go together?
10:05No thanks.
10:06There are wild beasts around here.
10:07It's dangerous alone.
10:08Well, even if I'm wearing this stupid dress, I'm still a man.
10:12I'm not afraid of any beasts.
10:21So, want to reconsider my offer?
10:24And just so you know, there's more than one snake out here.
10:27Damn it.
10:28I might actually need this jerk to protect me.
10:31Fine.
10:32Whatever.
10:37Stop!
10:38In broad daylight?
10:39What are you doing?
10:41Fixing my shirt.
10:43What did you think?
10:46Damn.
10:47His body is actually amazing.
10:50If you want to look, you can be bold.
10:52I'd be honored if my muscles have your approval.
10:56Who's looking?
10:57Narcissist.
10:59Then do you want to touch them?
11:02What are you doing?
11:06I know you want me to.
11:07Do you want me to do?
11:08I don't.
11:12Kissing a man actually feels pretty good.
11:20Thank God it was just a dream.
11:23Lucas, Lucas, get a grip.
11:24You're straight.
11:26Stop having stupid dreams like that.
11:28And the guys you hate the most.
11:30I'm straight.
11:32I'm straight.
11:34Being queen feels wonderful.
11:36Even my hair is smoother than before.
11:40This is...
11:42My hair!
11:43What happened to my hair?
11:45Wow.
11:46This means Snow White and Prince Charming have met.
11:49What?
11:49From now on, every time their relationship grows a little deeper,
11:53you'll lose another patch of hair.
11:55And when they truly fall in love,
11:58your head will become one perfectly smooth boiled egg.
12:02No!
12:03Lucas!
12:04Marcus!
12:05I'll kill you both!
12:07Spread my order!
12:08Hunt down Snow White across the entire kingdom, alive or dead!
12:12Your Majesty,
12:14perhaps the legendary magic mirror could cure your boldness.
12:17Right!
12:18The all-knowing mirror!
12:19It has to be able to fix my hair!
12:22Go find that mirror immediately!
12:24I want it brought to me within three days!
12:27Lucas,
12:29Once I catch you,
12:30I'm gonna pluck every single hair off your head.
12:37Look!
12:38Is that a princess?
12:39Princess?
12:40That's obviously a man.
12:42A man who likes wearing dresses.
12:44Hey, handsome, cute dress!
12:46Mind lend it to my big sis sometime?
12:50Just ignore them.
12:51I hate this dress!
12:52Oh my goodness!
12:54Whose daughter is this?
12:55She's so tall!
13:01Mom!
13:02That lady has stubble!
13:04Don't say nonsense!
13:06Apologize to the lady!
13:07Wait.
13:09He really does have stubble.
13:10I'm a man!
13:11A man in a dress?
13:13Sick!
13:14Calm down.
13:15Don't bother with them.
13:22Look!
13:23There's a hot girl bathing!
13:24Man!
13:25Tonight's our lucky night!
13:28Why does the voice sound like a guy?
13:30You know nothing!
13:32Androger and your beauty is trendy!
13:37It's a man!
13:38My eyes!
13:39Hey!
13:39I haven't even screamed yet!
13:41What are you screaming?
13:41I swear I'll never peek at bathing girls again!
13:44Please stop sending cross-dressing dudes to test me!
13:47I've had enough of this!
13:49Sprite!
13:49Fairy!
13:50Whatever!
13:51Just get out here right now!
13:56I want to get rid of this damn dress!
14:00Well, it's not impossible!
14:01Play a game with me, and you can change it!
14:04What game?
14:05Look!
14:10No way!
14:11Whatever the game is, I won't play anything with him!
14:14Hey!
14:14What did I do to you this time?
14:16Then I guess you'll just keep wearing the dress!
14:18Honestly, the more I look at it on you, the better it suits you!
14:22Fine!
14:22What game?
14:25Blindfold Feeding!
14:27Lucas puts on the blindfold.
14:29Marcus sits three meters away.
14:31Lucas has to walk over and feed the strawberry to Marcus.
14:34That's it?
14:35Easy peasy!
14:36But you can't use your hands!
14:37You have to hold the strawberry in your mouth!
14:39What kind of perverted game is that?
14:42What's wrong?
14:42Scared?
14:43Who's scared?
14:44I'll just pretend I'm feeding a pet!
14:48Okay.
15:07Where are you touching?
15:09Shut up!
15:20Oh my god.
15:22Does this count as kissing Marcus?
15:24This is a straight man's greatest humiliation.
15:27His lips are just as soft as in my dream.
15:32Wait!
15:32Why am I reacting?
15:34No, no, no!
15:35That's impossible!
15:36What's wrong?
15:37Stomachache?
15:37I'm fine!
15:38Don't come closer!
15:39Ho, ho!
15:40I see what's going on now!
15:41Shut up!
15:45You know, I'm actually the same as you.
15:49Take some time.
15:51Wait!
15:51Does this mean I've actually been turned gay?
15:55No way!
15:56Cooled off yet?
15:58Time to change the clothes!
16:01Finally!
16:02I can get out of that damn dress!
16:06I can't reveal my identity to Lucas just yet.
16:08Please keep it a secret for me.
16:10This is getting good!
16:11The plot just keeps getting juicier!
16:14Do you think you're watching a reality show?
16:25Hungry?
16:26No, I'm fine.
16:27Here.
16:29Thirsty?
16:30I said I'm fine.
16:32Cold?
16:33Drop it!
16:34I'm not cold.
16:40I've never seen such a beautiful flower.
16:42This is for you.
16:43Just so you know,
16:44this adorable little flower,
16:45completely poisonous.
16:52It has no taste at all.
16:54I want juice.
16:55Although there's no juice,
16:57honey water on the house.
16:58And trust me,
16:59we got plenty.
17:00You're not trying to...
17:02Watch me.
17:03Marcus, don't do it!
17:06This is gonna end badly.
17:11Hey there.
17:14Are they coming?
17:16Are they coming?
17:25It's all your fault.
17:26We almost got stung to death,
17:28and you're still laughing?
17:29You're still cute when you're mad.
17:33No, no, no.
17:34I'm straight.
17:35Totally straight.
17:36From now on,
17:37you must stay at least one meter away from me.
17:47Marcus!
17:49At your service?
17:50Pull me up right now!
17:51Didn't you just tell me to keep more than a meter away from you?
17:54This pit looks at least three meters deep,
17:57which meets your requirement perfectly.
17:59Marcus, stop messing around!
18:01But you literally make that rule like five seconds ago.
18:04Asshole, just wait till I get up there.
18:05I swear, I'm gonna mess you up!
18:07Why don't you climb up here first,
18:09then we'll talk.
18:10Marcus!
18:10Come back!
18:12Jerk.
18:12All that talk about liking me was a lie.
18:15Bullying me at school,
18:17and now abandoning me.
18:19I almost believed him.
18:21Crying?
18:23Idiot.
18:23Didn't you leave?
18:24What are you doing back here?
18:25Silly boy.
18:26I'd never leave you here.
18:29Grab on.
18:29I'll pull you up.
18:30I've got you!
18:39Aren't you the captain of the football team?
18:41How come you're so weak?
18:43Maybe because you're heavier than you look.
18:45I'm literally standard weight.
18:47The real problem here is you're weak.
18:48Fine, fine.
18:49It's all my fault.
18:52You can scoot a little closer.
18:53Trust me, it's way warmer over here.
18:56In your dreams.
18:57I'd rather freeze to death.
18:58Fine.
18:59Have it your way.
19:00Idiot.
19:01Freezing your ass off and still pretending you're fine.
19:06Damn it!
19:07Why am I in his arms?
19:10Hmm.
19:10No wonder he won prom king two years in a row.
19:13He really is good looking.
19:15You're awake!
19:16I-I-I was just...
19:25What the hell are you doing?
19:28Lucas, I'm sorry.
19:29I just...
19:29Let me tell you, Marcus.
19:30I'm straight.
19:31I could never like you.
19:32I was just being impulsive.
19:33I'll never forgive you for bullying me at school.
19:36You make me sick.
19:38What did you say?
19:39I said, you make me sick.
19:41There is no way I'd ever fall for a jerk like you.
19:45You're right.
19:45I am a jerk.
19:47I'm such an idiot for falling for you.
19:49Marcus, let go of me.
19:50I'm such a fool for doing everything I could to get your attention.
19:53For trying to protect you this whole time.
19:56But from now on, I'm not going to like you anymore.
20:00I finally got rid of this jerk.
20:02I should be happy.
20:03But why do I feel so lost?
20:06We need to figure out how to get out of here.
20:10Marcus!
20:10I heard you.
20:16Grab it.
20:28Thanks.
20:30Let's go.
20:38Marcus?
20:39Marcus?
20:39Where are you?
20:45Marcus!
20:47Help!
20:50Marcus!
20:52Help!
20:54Run!
21:03I said, run!
21:04Do you hear me?
21:06No.
21:07I can't leave you to face this alone.
21:13Lucas, get out of here.
21:15I can't hold it off much longer.
21:17But you?
21:18What I said before.
21:19I didn't mean it.
21:20I lied to you.
21:21What?
21:21I still fucking like you.
21:24I've liked you since middle school.
21:25And I never stopped.
21:33I'm not leaving you here.
21:50I'm not leaving you here.
21:51Are you hurt?
21:53No, I'm fine.
21:54Just...
21:55My legs are just a little shaky.
22:05He actually risked his life to save me.
22:08After I was so mean to him.
22:10I said, you make me sick.
22:12There is no way I'd ever fall for a jerk like you.
22:14Did I go too far with what I said?
22:17If it weren't for him, those scars would probably be on me.
22:23It's ready.
22:24You first.
22:26Marcus, I said those things earlier out of anger too.
22:30I know I was way out of line.
22:31I'm sorry.
22:34Lucas, would you just give us a chance?
22:36I don't expect you to say yes right now.
22:38I just want to know, is there even a tiny chance you could ever like me?
22:43How could I ever like a guy?
22:45It should be an easy answer.
22:46So why is it so hard to say?
22:48I'm sorry.
22:49I can't.
22:50I'm really grateful you saved my life.
22:53But I'm straight.
22:54And I'll never be anything else.
22:56I...
22:56I'm sorry.
22:59I get it.
23:00I respect your choice.
23:03But I'm still gonna like you anyway.
23:10I'm finally free of his nonsense, so why don't feel happy at all?
23:14Get a grip, Lucas.
23:15You're just grateful he saved you.
23:18You're not gay.
23:19A glowing flower?
23:21Never seen one of those before.
23:24It smells special.
23:28It's so hot.
23:29What's going on?
23:47Marcus.
23:51What's wrong?
23:54What's wrong?
23:55I want you.
24:03You've got a fever?
24:04Why are you burning up?
24:12Lucas.
24:13Are you drunk?
24:15There isn't even any alcohol out here.
24:16Marcus.
24:17I know you want me.
24:19You're not thinking straight.
24:20I'm not taking advantage of you like this.
24:22I'm not taking advantage of you like this.
24:50Don't...
24:50Don't...
24:53Don't what?
24:53Don't stop.
24:59Don't stop.
25:12Morning.
25:14Don't touch me!
25:16So now you're denying everything?
25:18You were pretty eager last night.
25:21I don't remember any of it.
25:23And if you tell anyone about last night, I'll cut your tongue out.
25:26This is all that stupid flower's fault.
25:28I only lost control because that damn pollen.
25:31Pollen can't create desire.
25:33It only amplifies what's already there.
25:35Admit it, Lucas.
25:36You want me.
25:38Do I really want him?
25:40No.
25:40There's no way this bastard turned me gay.
25:45That's Prince Charming's castle.
25:46Tomorrow, you'll finally meet him.
25:48Great.
25:49After tomorrow, I won't have to see your annoying face ever again.
25:52Why does it feel like my heart is breaking?
25:55That flower must have fried my brain.
25:57I'm just used to having him around all the time.
26:00That's all.
26:01Don't worry.
26:02Once I get back to the real world, everything will go back to normal.
26:09The last glowing thing we found was an aphrodisiac flower.
26:12Don't tell me this glowing water is some kind of love potion, too.
26:15Why don't you take a sip and find out?
26:18Well, look who finally made it here.
26:20You again?
26:21Every time you show up, something bad happens.
26:24Relax.
26:24I'm just here for the show this time.
26:27This is the Spring of Desire.
26:28If you look into it, you'll see what your heart wants most.
26:31Oh, yeah?
26:32Then let's see what I want most.
26:34Probably a massive feast back in the real world.
26:37Back off.
26:38Okay.
26:39Okay.
26:47No way.
26:48The thing I want most is him.
26:51What did you see?
26:51Why are you so red?
26:53Nothing.
26:53I just saw a beautiful woman bathing.
26:55A beautiful woman bathing?
26:57You really are straight.
26:59You can fool him, but not me.
27:02I know exactly what you saw.
27:04It must be because I'm Snow White.
27:06Maybe this body's female hormones are messing with my head.
27:10Stop lying to yourself.
27:11The Spring of Desire is never wrong.
27:15Do I really like him?
27:16What are you two whispering about?
27:18We were just talking about Lucas' deepest desire.
27:21Shut up!
27:22I'm an honest elf.
27:23My mother raised me never to lie.
27:25Please.
27:26You're just here for the drama.
27:27What are you two even talking about?
27:29Why can't you tell me?
27:31I saw us kissing!
27:32Really?
27:33Lucas, you like me too, don't you?
27:34So what if I do?
27:36I have to fall in love with Prince Charming if I want to leave this place.
27:40Marcus, we can't be together.
27:42It's time to tell Lucas who I really am.
27:45Lucas, wait!
27:46Lucas, there's something I have to tell you.
27:48I'm actually...
27:57Joanna sent them?
27:59No idea.
28:00But they don't look friendly.
28:01On three, we run in opposite directions.
28:04You think you can outrun them?
28:06Pretty sure you failed P.E.
28:07I was the 10-meter sprint champion in kindergarten, thank you very much.
28:12Your Highness Prince Charming, we finally found you!
28:15Your Highness!
28:17You're Prince Charming?
28:19Your Highness, and this is...
28:21He's Snow White, my fiancé.
28:24No, my fiancé.
28:26Not that either.
28:27Whatever.
28:28He's the one I love.
28:29He's the legendary Snow White with the stubble?
28:31I don't care if he's a man or a woman.
28:33He's the one I'm going to marry.
28:35But His Majesty has given strict orders.
28:38He cannot accept two men marrying.
28:40This Snow White is forbidden from entering the castle.
28:42That old fossil!
28:43People are out here falling in love with ChatGPT.
28:45Lucas is at least a real human being.
28:48His Majesty also said that if you insist on marrying him, he'll hang your embarrassing baby pics at the castle
28:53gate.
28:54Your embarrassing baby pictures?
28:56Your king's got a pretty good sense of humor.
29:00Wait.
29:01So you were fucking lying to me this whole time?
29:04Lucas, I'm sorry.
29:05I didn't mean to deceive you.
29:07I was afraid that if you knew the truth...
29:08I finally accepted my feelings for you.
29:11And all this time, you were just making a fool out of me.
29:14No.
29:14Lucas, I like you.
29:16I would never hurt you.
29:17Enough!
29:17I hate being lied to more than anything.
29:20Lucas, I was wrong.
29:21Please, just let me explain.
29:26Hey, wrong way!
29:28That's the Enchanted Forest!
29:29The Enchanted Forest?
29:30The one no one's ever made it out of alive?
29:34Dammit.
29:35Liar.
29:36You kept saying you liked me, but you were lying to me the whole time!
29:48Who's there?
29:49Another stupid just wandered in.
29:52Perfect.
29:53It's been forever since we've had fresh meat.
29:55He looks delicious.
29:57Oh, crap.
29:58I must have stumbled into the legendary seven villains.
30:03God, I'd kill for a Big Mac right now.
30:07Nope, I can't hold it in!
30:09Did you see his face?
30:11He went completely white.
30:19You guys are the legendary seven villains?
30:22You ever seen demons this handsome?
30:24We're not demons.
30:26We're victims.
30:28Victims?
30:29We used to be guards for the evil queen,
30:31but she wanted us to take turns being her lovers.
30:34Monday through Sunday.
30:35No repeats.
30:36We're respectable guards, okay?
30:38Not rent boys.
30:39Why would we ever agree to that?
30:40So she got mad,
30:41threw us into the enchanted forest,
30:43and trapped us here with dark magic.
30:45I can't believe the seven dwarves from the fairy tale
30:48actually have it this rough.
30:49We've been stuck here so long.
30:51We're dying of boredom.
30:52But hey, now you're here.
30:54At least we've got a new face around.
30:55What's your name?
30:56Where are you from?
30:57Do you have a girlfriend?
30:58Please!
30:59That's outdated.
30:59Gay is in now.
31:00So, do you have a boyfriend?
31:03Oh, so there is someone.
31:05No!
31:05Nothing like that!
31:06Then why are you blushing?
31:09I...
31:10I'm hot.
31:11Okay?
31:12Tell us more.
31:19We have a witness who says Snow White ran into the enchanted forest.
31:23You boys wouldn't happen to know where he is, would you?
31:25Wait, is that guy Snow White?
31:27By order of the queen,
31:28if you reveal Snow White's whereabouts,
31:31your freedom will be restored.
31:35Damn.
31:35They know I'm Snow White now?
31:37Are they gonna hand me over?
31:40Oof.
31:40You're too late.
31:42What do you mean?
31:43Snow White got eaten by a beast the second he ran into the enchanted forest.
31:46I saw it with my own eyes.
31:48It was brutal.
31:49Total bloodbath.
31:51Want me to take you to the scene?
31:52Though fair warning,
31:53you probably won't be able to eat for days.
31:55No, no, no.
31:57That won't be necessary.
31:58As long as I've got something to report back to the queen.
32:01Head back and inform the queen,
32:03Snow White is dead.
32:10Hey, they're gone.
32:12You're safe now.
32:13Why did you help me?
32:15Because we hate that old witch of a queen.
32:17The enemy of our enemy is our friend.
32:21Your majesty, word from the guard,
32:24Snow White is dead.
32:26Finally, that little noose is dead.
32:29So my hair should grow back now, right?
32:32Oh, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.
32:38I thought my hair was supposed to grow back once he died.
32:42That's because Snow White isn't dead.
32:44Who are you?
32:45I'm the all-knowing magic mirror.
32:47Oh, wow, your majesty, that hair is a bold choice.
32:50Shut up!
32:51Just tell me how to get my hair back.
32:53As long as Snow White and Prince Charming never fall in love,
32:56your hair will grow back.
32:57I'm going to the enchanted forest and killing him myself.
33:00Your majesty, those three hairs of yours would be gone in one gust of wind.
33:04Shut up!
33:04Let me do it.
33:05I hate couples more than anything.
33:07The second I see them acting all sweet, I want to lose it.
33:10All he has to do is take one bite of this apple pie, and it's over.
33:16It's been days, and that bastard Marcus still hasn't come looking for me.
33:20Figures.
33:21You can't trust a word, men say.
33:26Who are you?
33:27I'm the little match girl's sister.
33:29The little apple pie girl.
33:30Sister?
33:31With those wrinkles, you look more like the little apple pie grandma.
33:34Oh, I have never seen such a handsome man in my life.
33:37Apple pie handsome?
33:40Wow.
33:41Smells incredible.
33:42Go on, it's free.
33:43Wait.
33:44Apples in fairy tales are always poisoned.
33:46You're not Joanna, are you?
33:49Who's Joanna?
33:50In fairy tales, the evil queen dresses up as an old woman and tricks Snow White into eating
33:55a poisoned apple.
33:57Joanna, stop pretending.
33:59I'm not her.
34:01I'm just the little apple pie girl.
34:03I know that's your disguise, Joanna.
34:05And your makeup is terrible.
34:07Hey, you can question my character, but not my makeup skills.
34:11Come on, let's rip the mask off her.
34:17No, no, stop.
34:18Stop.
34:20So, you really aren't Joanna.
34:22I told you I wasn't, and you still ripped my clothes off.
34:25Sorry, I got it wrong.
34:27I offered you free apple pie, and somehow I'm the bad guy.
34:31Okay, okay, don't cry.
34:32I'll eat it.
34:33I'll eat it.
34:36Lucas.
34:37Lucas.
34:39What are you doing here?
34:41I've been looking for you this whole time.
34:43Looking for me?
34:44What, so you could keep lying to me?
34:45Lucas, can you stop being impossible for one second?
34:48I'm impossible?
34:48You're the one who's heartless, shameless, and impossible.
34:50How am I heartless?
34:51How am I shameless?
34:52How am I impossible?
34:53How are you not heartless?
34:53How are you not shameless?
34:54How are you not impossible?
34:56Fine.
34:57Even if I am heartless, shameless, and impossible.
34:59What are you two doing?
35:00Practicing a damn tongue twister?
35:03Handsome.
35:03Want some apple pie?
35:05Might help you calm down.
35:06I'm not hungry.
35:07Come on.
35:09Eat a little.
35:10You need energy if you're going to keep arguing.
35:12I said, I'm not hungry.
35:13Just one bite.
35:14God, you're annoying.
35:15Can't you see we're in the middle of something?
35:18Fine.
35:18I'll eat it.
35:19Happy?
35:26Spit it out!
35:26Do you have any idea how hard that was to make?
35:29I pulled three all-nighters on that pie!
35:32Let go!
35:33What are you doing?
35:34Let him go!
35:35So you do still care about me?
35:37God, I hate couples like you!
35:39Will you two die if you stop acting lovey-dooby for one second?
35:43God!
35:43Calm down.
35:44Don't do anything stupid.
35:45You can always make another one.
35:48Seriously?
35:49It was just an apple pie.
35:51That was my masterpiece!
35:52I spent forever perfecting that poison blend!
35:55Wait, so you really were sent by Joanna?
35:58Well, obviously.
35:59Why else would I drag myself into this dump of a forest to deliver apple pie?
36:03As long as we're here, you're not hurting Lucas.
36:05I wasn't even planning to hurt him.
36:07A man that handsome is practically in danger.
36:10But the queen gave me orders.
36:12No matter what it takes, I have to keep him and Prince Charmin apart.
36:16Help!
36:16He's trying to stab me!
36:17I'm not!
36:18I was just...
36:22Please!
36:26As long as I'm here, you're not laying a finger on Lucas.
36:29I...
36:30I wasn't trying to hurt him.
36:32I was going to kill myself.
36:34I failed my mission.
36:36If I go back, the queen will punish me anyway.
36:38Might as well end it myself.
36:40Oh.
36:41Sorry.
36:42My bad.
36:43Well, be our guest.
36:46Wait!
36:48Your job is to keep Snow White and Prince Charming from ending up together, right?
36:52Then wouldn't poisoning Prince Charming work just as well?
36:55Huh?
36:57You're right!
36:59Poisoning Prince Charming works just as well!
37:02Serves you right for being greedy and snatching someone else's food.
37:05That's what you get.
37:06All right.
37:07Mission accomplished.
37:09What?
37:11You do realize that pie you just swallowed was poisoned, right?
37:15Right.
37:15The pie was poisoned!
37:21Water!
37:22Somebody get me water!
37:26I think I'm dying.
37:30Marcus actually took the fall for you.
37:32That is so moving!
37:35Is this what true love looks like?
37:37If somebody did that for me, I'd marry him on the spot.
37:39I don't care if it's a man, a woman, a cat, or a dog.
37:42He didn't even know the pie was poisoned.
37:44What's so moving about that?
37:45Yeah, but before that, he jumped into that pit for you.
37:49He fought a beast for you.
37:50Keep going and I'm going to fall for him myself!
37:52Lying to you was wrong.
37:53But his feelings for you are real.
37:55Lucas, just forgive him.
37:56Yeah, come on.
37:56Just forgive him.
37:57All right, all right.
37:58I get it, okay?
37:59Marcus, we just did you a huge favor.
38:01So how are you going to thank us?
38:02Me?
38:03I'm poisoned!
38:04I'm dying here!
38:05Maybe help me first?
38:07Right, he's poisoned!
38:08Come on, think of something!
38:10Hmm.
38:10But you actually look pretty good.
38:12Your skin's kind of glowing.
38:13Maybe it was fake poison?
38:15Worst case, he gets diarrhea for a couple days.
38:17Okay, that's a relief.
38:21Marcus!
38:23You're-
38:24Marcus!
38:25Okay, we know you hate him, but this is a little much.
38:28He really is poisoned!
38:29Come on, think of something!
38:32I heard my grandpa talk about a miracle cure once.
38:35Hot oil!
38:36Heat kills poison!
38:41This kind of worm feeds on toxins.
38:43If we put it inside Marcus, it'll suck all the poison out of his body.
38:51It says the best way to get poison out is to literally beat it out of him.
38:55Watch this.
38:59You didn't just break his ribs, did you?
39:05I've got another idea.
39:06Enough!
39:07At this rate, the poison won't kill him.
39:09You too will!
39:11Maybe there is one thing that might work.
39:13What?
39:14True love's kiss.
39:15In fairy tales, Snow White eats the poisoned apple, and Prince Charmia's kiss wakes her up.
39:20Yeah, but that's a fairy tale.
39:22This is the real world.
39:23You wouldn't get it.
39:24To me, this is the fairy tale.
39:26This isn't just an excuse to kiss him, is it?
39:28Like I need an excuse?
39:29We've kissed plenty of times already.
39:34I'm only doing this to save him.
39:38And he still says he's not gay.
39:45Why didn't it work?
39:46Maybe your kiss wasn't heartfelt enough?
39:47Shut up!
39:48I'm trying to save him!
39:49Kiss him again!
39:50Kiss him again!
39:53I refuse to believe I can't kiss you awake!
39:59Lucas, it's no use.
40:01He already missed the golden seven-hour window for antidotes.
40:04He's not breathing anymore.
40:05Lucas, I'm sorry.
40:08We should bury him in the prettiest garden in the enchanted forest.
40:12How could you just die like this?
40:14You said you'd protect me forever!
40:16If you're dead, who's supposed to protect me now?
40:19Marcus, you asshole!
40:20I never got to tell you.
40:22I fell for you a long time ago.
40:25Lucas, the grave's ready.
40:26It's time.
40:27I love you, Marcus.
40:32I love you, too.
40:34You're not dead?
40:35I woke up the first time you kissed me.
40:37Then why were you playing dead?
40:38Because I wanted to hear you say you loved me a few more times.
40:41Marcus!
40:41You were messing with me again!
40:44Lucas, thank you.
40:46You've made me the happiest man in the world.
40:54So this is what love looks like.
40:55We're leaving Lucas with you.
40:57You better take good care of him from now on.
41:01Thank you for taking care of me all this time.
41:06Wait!
41:06I just thought of a way to get you out of the enchanted forest!
41:10The way is...
41:15Why did...
41:17Lucas!
41:18Ah!
41:19You didn't finish your words!
41:21What was the way out?
41:22Lucas, come back!
41:24Wait.
41:25Could Lucas' method be true love's kiss?
41:29In your dreams!
41:31I am not kissing you!
41:32I mean...
41:33It wouldn't hurt to try.
41:46Your Majesty!
41:47Good news!
41:48Well, out with it.
41:50Mission accomplished.
41:51Prince Charming is dead.
41:53There's no way those two can end up together now.
41:55Really?
41:56I saw him eat the apple pie with my own eyes.
41:59He dropped dead right after.
42:02Excellent!
42:02If I can't poison that bitch Lucas to death, then poisoning his Prince Charming works just
42:07as well!
42:09So my hair should grow back now, right?
42:13What?
42:15Ah!
42:16What is going on?
42:18Didn't you say Prince Charming was dead?
42:20I saw him eat the pie myself!
42:23Then why is my hair still falling?
42:25Maybe...
42:26Maybe killing Prince Charming doesn't work the same way.
42:28Ah!
42:29I'm gonna kill you!
42:30Ah!
42:33Your Majesty?
42:35Your Majesty!
42:37Where are you?
42:38I haven't even told you who the fairest woman in the land is yet!
42:45Obviously me.
42:53I'm back?
42:59Was...
42:59Was all of that just a dream?
43:04If all of that was just a dream, then Marcus and I...
43:07You damn bald woman!
43:09Get away from me!
43:13Honey, you can't throw me out!
43:15You said you were going to marry me!
43:18I like women with hair!
43:20I do not want to wake up in the middle of the night thinking I'm holding a man!
43:24My hair will grow back!
43:25The doctor said it's hair loss from stress!
43:27Stress?
43:28You use my card every day to buy bags, shoes, and makeup!
43:31What exactly are you stressed about?
43:33If I were still Queen, I'd have your head chopped off, you old fool!
43:38Queen?
43:40So it wasn't a dream.
43:41It was real!
43:43I wasted years of my youth on an old fossil like you!
43:46You owe me a huge settlement!
43:48Joanna, you tried to poison me and you still think you deserve a payout?
43:52Want to see how fast I call the cops?
43:54You bitch!
43:54If it weren't for you, I'd still be the mighty Queen!
43:57Joanna, don't forget.
43:58In fairy tales, the evil Queen never gets a happy ending.
44:01In the fairy tale, Snow White falls for Prince Charming.
44:04What about you?
44:05Did you fall for your Prince Charming too, Snow White?
44:08Your father's such an old fossil.
44:10There's no way he'll accept the whole LGBT thing.
44:13He'll definitely throw you out.
44:15Queen?
44:16Snow White?
44:16Are you two doing cosplay or something?
44:18If I can't inherit your father's money, then you don't get to inherit it either!
44:24Lucas is my son.
44:25He's my only heir.
44:26What happens in this family is none of your business.
44:28Oh yeah?
44:29What if your only heir is gay?
44:31You're gay?
44:34I'm not...
44:35Not?
44:35Because I heard you and that boy Marcus were all over each other, hugging, kissing, the whole thing.
44:41Shut up!
44:43Dad, yeah, I...
44:48Dad, you're not mad?
44:49Truth is, I had a boyfriend when I was younger too.
44:52What?
44:53His name was Tom.
44:54Six foot three, eight pack abs, blonde hair, blue eyes, insanely hot.
45:00Anyway, that's all in the past.
45:02As long as you two really love each other, I don't care if it's a man or a woman.
45:07Wow, I had no idea gay was hereditary.
45:10Instead of stirring the pot, maybe you should focus on fixing that bald head of yours.
45:13Shut up!
45:17So, what was that boy's name again?
45:20Marcus.
45:21I have to go find him.
45:28Hey nerd, lend us some money.
45:30Get lost, I don't have time for this.
45:32You know who we are and you still talk to us like that?
45:35I've dealt with the seven bullies.
45:37What are you two supposed to be?
45:38If you're not going to hand it over, don't blame us for what happens next.
45:44Try touching him.
45:45See what happens.
45:47If you run now, you might still make it.
45:49Come on, let's go.
45:50He's the football captain.
45:54You okay?
45:55Marcus!
45:56I missed you!
45:57Lucas!
45:59What are you doing?
46:03Marcus, weren't we together?
46:04Together?
46:05Since when were we together?
46:07That's news to me.
46:08You don't remember?
46:09Prince Charming?
46:10The Enchanted Forest?
46:12The Seven Boys?
46:13Lucas, what are you even talking about?
46:15You ate the poisoned apple pie.
46:17I kissed you.
46:18You told me you loved me.
46:19You seriously don't remember any of it?
46:21Lucas, have you been reading too many fairy tales or something?
46:24Was it all just a dream?
46:25It wasn't a dream.
46:26Marcus, think.
46:27We went through all of that together.
46:28Lucas, I have no idea what you're talking about.
46:32And I've never liked you.
46:36Then why did you save me just now?
46:38If I see anybody getting bullied, I step in.
46:40It had nothing to do with you.
46:43What the hell happened?
46:45Why doesn't he remember any of it?
46:48Damn you, Marcus.
46:49You turned me gay, and now you don't remember any of it.
47:05Your Highness Snow White.
47:07I'm back in the fairy tale world again?
47:09You're not back.
47:10I just moved the fairy tale world into your house for now.
47:14Wasn't all of this supposed to be over?
47:15What do you want now?
47:17Relax.
47:18Snow White and Prince Charming's story still hasn't reached the finale.
47:21The finale?
47:23Marcus.
47:24Come on, let's see the first ending.
47:25You're gonna love this one.
47:29Guys!
47:30Thank God!
47:31You guys made it out of the Enchanted Forest!
47:34That's thanks to you, Lucas.
47:36Me?
47:36But I didn't even finish what I was saying.
47:38You and Marcus gave us hope.
47:39You made us believe true love really can break any curse.
47:42So, we tried the true love's kiss thing too, and the curse broke.
47:46That's amazing!
47:47I'm so happy for you guys!
47:49First ending.
47:50The seven boys break the evil queen's curse and win back their freedom.
47:54Hold on.
47:55We're not done yet.
47:56There's still the second ending.
47:58Second ending.
47:59Joanna got exactly what she deserved.
48:01Mrs. Joanna, based on your test results, your hair is never growing back.
48:04No!
48:05That's impossible!
48:06Your scalp is severely inflamed.
48:08You need to stop wearing wigs immediately.
48:10What?
48:10How am I supposed to go out without a wig?
48:12Are you saying I'm supposed to spend the rest of my life as a bald beauty?
48:15Bald, yes.
48:16Beauty, not exactly.
48:18She'd be bald and alone for the rest of her life.
48:22And now for the third ending, the final ending.
48:25Prince Charming is about to officially confess to Snow White.
48:28That ending's probably not happening.
48:30Marcus doesn't remember any of it.
48:32Are you sure he doesn't remember anything?
48:37Marcus?
48:37I thought you didn't remember any of it.
48:39Idiot.
48:40I was messing with you.
48:41And you said you didn't even like me.
48:43I just wanted to make sure.
48:45I needed to know if you really liked me.
48:46Or if you were just moved because of everything that happened in the fairy tale world.
48:49Asshole!
48:50Do you know how miserable I was?
48:52I'm sorry, Lucas.
48:53I promise I'll never make you feel that way again.
48:56Lucas, I love you.
48:57Will you be my Snow White forever?
49:03Final ending.
49:05Snow White and Prince Charming finally get there happily ever after.
49:10All right, I'm off to mess with the next fairy tale.
49:14See you in the next story.
49:16See you in the next story.
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