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00:00She is eccentric and elusive. No one has ever seen her before.
00:05Whoever finds the Goddess Healer will get the five billion dollars.
00:10Oh, kind stranger. Let me repay you by granting you a wish.
00:14I wish for you to cure my brother's illness. Can you do that?
00:17My brother's a war hero who single-handedly saved his country from a terrorist attack.
00:21If he's a hero to you, then that means he must be a good person.
00:25It's a deal. I'll save Lysander Armstrong.
00:28How can this shit-stained hovo cure your brother?
00:32I mean, you wouldn't be homeless if you were actually any good.
00:35That's right. The Queen Angel and I are already the top doctors in the world.
00:40If we can't save her, no one can.
00:43Don't don the mantle of doctor when you're only capable of harm.
00:47Now stop getting in my way.
00:50Every second counts.
00:55Healer Goddess, hear my plea.
00:59Please save my time.
01:17Rod of a sepulius.
01:20Rod of a sepulius.
01:36Rejuvenate.
01:45Grace, she is the healer goddess!
01:49No, please. Don't call me that. I'm just glad I could help.
01:58Here you go, miss.
02:03Why be way down by a throne when I can live amongst the common people and help those the most
02:07in need?
02:20You must be rushing off to go find your jewels, because only a sackless coward would hit a puppy and
02:25run!
02:28Aw, it's okay, little guy. I'll fix you right up.
02:37Right, or you rights thronged.
02:42See? Good as the day you can kicking out of your mother's womb.
02:53Come on, Cleo. Let's go!
03:10Please, my brother's been in a coma the last two years.
03:15We have no idea what the illness is. If anyone can help cure him, we will pay you handsomely.
03:20Be Lysander Armstrong.
03:21His military family basically owns the entire global stock market.
03:26He's so hot!
03:28Does he come with the money?
03:29Yes. He'll even marry you if you can cure him.
03:32Money. Fame. Power. It's all yours.
03:40Are we still moving forward, Miss Trixie?
03:42Yes. Give the presidential contract to Marissa.
03:46Oh, I have another call coming in.
03:49Grandma!
03:50I'm dying! Save me, Trixie!
03:54Grandma?
03:56Grandma.
03:57When are you getting married? I'm already a hundred years old.
04:01I'm gonna keep you healthy forever, Grandma.
04:03And Butch is still on deployment, so that's why I haven't been married yet.
04:09Oh, but why marry a vegetable when I can bang a younger stud like you?
04:16You're talking about my brother's light. I don't have time for jokes.
04:21No!
04:30Please go feed your dog, Miss. Don't let it starve like you.
04:33Oh, kind stranger. Let me repay you by granting you a wish.
04:37Grant me a wish? That you can barely feed yourself.
04:40The downfall of humanity. It all starts with the loss of faith.
04:45What's that? Oh, Jesus. Giving me a migraine.
04:49Are you telling me to pray to God because we've been doing that?
04:52I'm telling you to have some faith in me.
04:55Okay. Uh, I wish for you to cure my brother's illness.
05:00Can you do that?
05:01I can topple mountains and make a king out of a frog if I wanted to.
05:05Cleo, stay right here for a second.
05:07Don't go too far, Cleo.
05:12Hold still.
05:20My migraine's gone. Okay, then let's go. If you can cure my brother, he'll even marry you.
05:26Come on. Come on. Oh!
05:41How is he? What is the diagnosis?
05:44Remember, you will not marry him unless you cure him.
05:47I'm sorry. I don't know what this is.
05:49Aren't you the queen of medicine? You're supposed to be one of the best.
05:52Don't worry, General. I'm the angel herbalist and I have mastered all healing methods of the East.
05:59I can detect what condition your son has with just one needle.
06:20I have no clue what this is.
06:24Oh, it looks like the angel herbalist doesn't live up to her name after all.
06:29That's why we saved the best for last.
06:31Me, the witch doctor. I'll save your son, Lysander.
06:46He's not budging. There's no movement.
06:48Truly, I have saved thousands of patients all over the world, but I don't know what this is.
06:54Lord, I've scoured the earth for the best doctors. They've tried all these methods and they've all failed.
07:01If we can't save him, there's only one person who can.
07:06Who?
07:09The goddess of healing.
07:13Wait a second. You're not talking about the legendary goddess you.
07:17That's correct. Her right rewrites the rond and her left leaves the bereft. That's her motto.
07:25It's what makes her a sage amongst mortals. We are nothing compared to her.
07:30She is eccentric and elusive. No one has ever seen her before.
07:35If this legendary healer is the only one that can truly save my son, I don't care if I go
07:41bankrupt.
07:42I will find her. James, come put out a voucher to the entire world.
07:48Whoever finds the goddess healer will get the five million dollars.
07:53There's no need.
08:07I'll save your son.
08:11Who the hell is she?
08:12Dad, she says she can cure Lysander.
08:14She's gonna save your brother? Don't be ridiculous. How can this shit-stained hobo cure your brother?
08:21Exactly. God, the unemployed are getting crazier and crazier.
08:25She's trying to scam her way into marrying the rich.
08:28Ew! She even brought a filthy dog with her.
08:32I bet it has fleas.
08:34That flea-invested, dirty thing is your companion.
08:38Don't try to steal Lysander Armstrong from us.
08:45Don't touch him.
08:48They say don't judge a book by its cover.
08:50But I can see from all your faces that you've failed.
08:53So step aside.
08:55I'll take it from here.
08:57Could you hold this?
08:58Ho, ho, ho, ho.
08:59You're not gonna touch my son.
09:01I'm the richest tycoon in this country, and a former general.
09:05I know a gold-digging whore when I see one.
09:08Mm-hmm.
09:08I bet she's only here because getting blowjobs on the street corners wasn't paying enough cash.
09:14Who knows what an unskilled, poor girl like her would do for some.
09:18A skinny-ass beggar trying to take advantage of Lysander Armstrong when he's unconscious?
09:25Ew!
09:26Disgusting.
09:26Go back to being a prostitute.
09:29Security!
09:30Get this STD-infested peasant out of here now.
09:33Let's go.
09:34If you throw me out, you're tossing away your son's last chance at life.
09:41Sir, we are at our wit's end trying to find a cure for Master Lysander into no avail.
09:46Maybe we should give her a try?
09:49You can always deal with her later if she turns out to be a fraud.
09:52All right, I'll give you a shot.
09:55But I warn you, if you fail, I'll have your and your dog's head mounted on my wall.
10:01Is that any way to ask for help?
10:04You'd be blessed to have me.
10:06And I'm only here to repay your younger son's kindness.
10:09But since I'm not welcome here, I'll leave.
10:14Devin, come find me when you have a different wish.
10:17Oh, Miss Trixie, my brother is a hero to me.
10:20I can't lose him.
10:22Well, if he's a hero to you, then that means he must be a good person.
10:28My brother's a war hero who single-handedly saved this country from a terrorist attack.
10:33Also, he's great with puppies. He'd make a great husband.
10:38Who says I want to marry him?
10:39As if the number one hottest 30 under 30 would even dream of marrying a penniless bum like you.
10:46Only a lunatic would be crazy enough to marry her.
10:49I mean, look at her.
10:50Even if she cleaned herself up, you couldn't find an ounce of femininity on her.
10:56Only those cut from the lowest ranks were bigger for such trivial matters.
11:00Continue wasting your time.
11:01But I'm saving this patient.
11:13Oh, okay!
11:16What's happening?
11:29What the hell are you doing?
11:32I knew she was a perv!
11:35She's definitely trying to steal Lysander from us.
11:37Do you all not know that sweat can tell you everything that's medically wrong with the patient?
11:41Are you insane?
11:42Security, smash her face in for licking my son!
11:46He's born with congenital heart disease, has a peanut allergy,
11:49and the condition he has is called endogenic cryomorphy.
11:54Yeah, right!
11:54I mean, no way you got all that just from licking him!
11:58Oh, okay.
11:58I've studied every disease known to man, right?
12:01I even have the badge of universal medicine right here.
12:04And I've never heard of endo-cryo-what?
12:11Huh.
12:12This?
12:18It is worth nothing when I have the real thing right here.
12:22What?
12:23What?
12:23So you think that this crummy walking stick of yours is, what, THE rod of a sepulius?
12:29Why don't you go back to the homeless asylum where you came from if you're going to be this delusional?
12:35I agree.
12:36I mean, even if she does solve this medical mystery,
12:38what is the point of the doctors who have studied for years?
12:42We are all certified.
12:44But Lysander does have congenital heart disease.
12:48She's right about everything.
12:52Yeah, but if she just throws out a bunch of fake diagnoses, one of them is bound to be right.
12:57And again, there is no such thing as endo-cryo-what-what?
13:01Endogenic cryomorphie.
13:02Oh.
13:02And of course none of you have heard of it.
13:04Because I just discovered it.
13:07This condition only affects those with both CHD and a peanut allergy.
13:11The chances are a billion to one.
13:13A hundred times rarer than winning the lottery.
13:15But lucky for you all, you've hit the jackpot by finding me.
13:20What a bunch of baloney.
13:22I mean, you wouldn't be homeless if you were actually any good.
13:27Precisely.
13:27You are just a scamming prostitute.
13:30You don't compare to me, us, who actually studied real medicine.
13:35I bet you were too poor to go to real medical school.
13:39Oh, so she went to the stripper circus instead.
13:42And now she's here putting on this clown show coming up with fake diseases,
13:46which mean nothing if you can't wake him up.
13:50Is that supposed to be a challenge?
13:52Oh my God.
13:54If you three incompetent doormats want to show me up,
13:58I think you all should grow parts of your brain back.
14:01Which, by the way, that condition is called an encephaly.
14:05What is that supposed to mean?
14:07It means you're being schooled by me.
14:08And I'm about to walk all over your medical licensees.
14:13Then let's have a bet.
14:15If you can't heal him, we'll break your hands.
14:20And then you can't pretend to have healing hands anymore.
14:25Hmm.
14:26These hands have saved more lives than all three of you combined.
14:30You're that desperate to get rid of your competition, huh?
14:34Miss Trixie, don't risk your hands for them.
14:37There's too many lives at stake.
14:41Don't worry.
14:42I got this.
14:45It's a deal.
14:47I'll save Lysander Armstrong.
14:50No one is dying on my watch.
14:57Lysander Armstrong has been in a vegetative state for two years.
15:05Are you stopping me because you're scared I'd actually succeed?
15:08Homeless or not, if you save my son, I'll give you everything.
15:20I'll even have Lysander my heir married.
15:24I'm not doing this for the money or for a wealthy husband.
15:27I just believe in helping good people and doing the right thing.
15:31Prepare a jacuzzi set at exactly 113 degrees Fahrenheit.
15:35Wait, wait, wait.
15:35What for?
15:36Don't listen to her.
15:39She probably stinks so bad that she just wants a bath to wash the homeless stench off of her.
15:44Firstly, this is called greatness.
15:47Secondly, even if you drown yourself in plastic surgery,
15:51you couldn't get rid of your own ugly moral character.
15:55What?
15:56Did you just call me?
15:59There's a man's life at stake here, and you're standing in my way.
16:03Don't don the mantle of doctor when you're only capable of harm.
16:07Now stop getting in my way, or I promise you, you will be bubbling at the mouth very soon.
16:13Oh, yeah?
16:14Hey, you wanna see real pain?
16:16Where's the dog?
16:17Well, put down the dog!
16:18With pleasure.
16:28Oh!
16:31Oh!
16:34Oh!
16:36Leaves the wrong breath.
16:38Shh!
16:41You don't deserve to call yourself a doctor.
16:47She's been poisoned!
16:49It was her!
16:51Do you see any poison on me?
16:53Medicine in the right hands can save lives,
16:55but in the wrong hands, it becomes nothing but poison.
16:59This bitch isn't good enough to take down the queen of medicine.
17:02Do you have one of your antidotes on you?
17:04Of course.
17:06I've saved entire civilizations with my antidotes.
17:09If I want to save someone, even the Grim Reaper can't stop me.
17:29Why is she skinning blood?
17:30This wasn't supposed to happen.
17:32I thought you said even the Grim Reaper can't get in your way.
17:35Angel or the list.
17:36This is what I call malpractice.
17:41This isn't fatal. She'll live.
17:43But she deserves a little punishment.
17:45Well, where's the jacuzzi I asked for?
17:48Jacuzzi is ready. Right this way.
17:49Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.
17:51What the hell is going on?
17:53You say you want your son to live on to give you tons of grandchildren, don't you?
17:57Then stop getting in my way.
17:59Every second counts.
18:01Let's go for our dip, shall we?
18:07General Armstrong, your family is the richest and most powerful in the nation.
18:12Are you really going to let this hobo slut touch your son?
18:16Hold on.
18:17You two are going in there alone?
18:20If you don't want these drooling vultures to see your son naked, then sure, invite everyone in.
18:27All right.
18:28But I warn you, no funny business.
18:31Let's go.
18:35Let's go.
18:37Let's go.
18:45Let's go.
18:51Let's go.
19:53You can't seriously be listening to that.
19:55We have to have faith.
19:58Where did you actually find this little life?
20:02On the streets?
20:04Are you shitting me?
20:06You found this bum on the streets?
20:08Are you nuts?
20:09You don't know her.
20:10You don't know her background.
20:11She could be a psychotic murder.
20:13That is it, General.
20:14You have to go in and stop this now.
20:16You're right.
20:17That's it.
20:17I'm shutting down this clown show right now.
20:19James, let's go.
20:20Yes, sir.
20:24Oh, my God.
20:32I told you I could stay out.
20:35No.
20:39This is a critical moment for you.
20:41We can't be interrupted.
20:42Otherwise, we both die.
20:48I'm not going to let this homeless hoochie mama trap my son.
20:54I'm going to save him myself.
20:56No, thanks.
21:00You see that, General?
21:02This isn't just a gull-dicking con woman.
21:04This is a witchcraft.
21:07I know what this is.
21:09This is the dark witch.
21:11I've heard of her.
21:12She uses her dark magic to steal the hearts of young, handsome men,
21:16and then she eats them alive.
21:18I'm going to kill that bitch before she takes my son.
21:21James, get the SWAT team.
21:23Yes, sir.
21:24Yes, sir.
21:27You regained consciousness.
21:39Help me.
21:40I'm just one.
21:46Something's wrong.
21:49You were drunk with an aphrodisiac.
21:52Lysander Armstrong and his fortune will soon be mine.
21:57That's wrong.
21:58I think I'm saving you from.
22:07Sir?
22:08The SWAT team is here.
22:10Captain Morales.
22:12My son is trapped behind there with a devious, man-eating witch.
22:18I need you to do whatever you can to tear down that door.
22:20Rest assured, General Armstrong.
22:23We'll break down that door and bury that bitch alive.
22:30Right.
22:31He writes the wrong.
22:40Who the fuck are you?
22:41And why the hell are we naked?
22:45Good.
22:46You're awake.
22:47I'm saving you.
22:48Saving you.
22:49By bathing with me.
22:51Who are you?
22:52You're a fucking spy?
22:54Talk.
22:55I swear to God, I'm going to have to do a christian for this.
22:59You were the one who was trying to kiss me in your stipper.
23:03I would never.
23:05Oh, really?
23:07Really?
23:19Look who's guilty now.
23:23I don't know what the fuck this is, all right?
23:25But it is a biological fact.
23:27A man is attracted to a naked woman and her breasts.
23:32It's science, okay?
23:33It just means that my body...
23:35Oh, shut up.
23:35...is physically...
23:38You're distracting me, you're different.
23:41And I'm a professional.
23:43I hear Lysander's voice.
23:45Captain, do something now.
23:46Ready.
23:52Or I'm just there.
23:54Aim.
23:56Get him, boys.
23:58Get him.
24:00Fire.
24:04Fire.
24:19Those damn smells.
24:21How is this possible?
24:23It's not even a scratch.
24:24I told you this is dark magic.
24:27Of course, your earthly bullets hold to a thing.
24:29No.
24:30I believe Miss Trixie is a good person.
24:32She's not the dark witch.
24:34Young Master Armstrong, you are too easily fooled.
24:38This homeless psycho doesn't even have the skills to make a living.
24:42How is she going to save someone else's life?
24:44That's right.
24:45The Queen Angel and I are already the top female doctors in the world.
24:49If we can't save him, no one can.
24:51Except for the goddess healer.
24:53Think about it.
24:54We heard Lysander's voice.
24:56He's been in a coma for two years.
24:57Miss Trixie must have woken him up.
24:59You're right.
25:00This homeless girl is maybe the goddess.
25:05Maybe this homeless girl is really the goddess.
25:08No.
25:09No.
25:10Absolutely not.
25:11There is no way this hobo girl is better than us.
25:14How could you know for sure?
25:16Right now, what we need to do is not interrupt Miss Trixie.
25:19You're wrong, sir.
25:21This homeless snake is using the forbidden techniques on Master Lysander.
25:25It's called borderline revival.
25:28She uses torturous pain to wake the patient.
25:31But only temporarily.
25:32It's a trick to pull the wool over your eyes and ears.
25:37That means my son is in tremendous pain.
25:40I'm going to ask you two to do whatever you can to kill that antler rod-bearing witch.
25:46My son doesn't deserve this.
25:47He is dying right now, naked in a jacuzzi with a smelly vagrant.
25:52Then it looks like it's up to me.
25:54The witch doctor.
25:56Only I know the right techniques to take her down.
26:00My son's life is in your hands.
26:02You heal him, I will give you whatever your heart desires.
26:07I don't know who you are, but there is no way I am letting you rip my golden bachelor away
26:13from me.
26:15This isn't the finishing touch.
26:18I must now give you the kiss of life.
26:21So we can both survive.
26:41It's poison gas.
26:43The poison gas will smoke them out and end her torture over Master Lysander.
26:48Poison gas?
26:50My son is in there.
26:51You're jeopardizing his life as well.
26:53No, don't worry, General.
26:55Gold diggers like her only care about themselves.
26:59Soon, she'll come out crying to Mommy.
27:01Then we can reverse the poison on your son, and then he can marry one of us.
27:06They really won't stop until they get both of us killed.
27:12I knew they promised you that I'd save you.
27:15It's now or never.
27:17Never.
27:28What the hell are they doing in there?
27:31It's been over ten minutes.
27:32Wait a second.
27:34You don't think that they're...
27:35You!
27:36You suffocated my brother and Miss Trixie in there!
27:39Don't point your fingers at me!
27:41If your brother's dead, it's because of that homeless gold digger!
27:44Oh my god.
27:45Yeah!
27:46She's the one who sealed the door shut.
27:48I mean, she probably locked themselves in there on accident.
27:51Miss Trixie wouldn't have to do that if you weren't trying to sabotage her from saving my brother!
27:56This is taking way too long!
27:58Captain Morales, it's time to get out the big guns.
28:03These bazookas can flatten even a bomb shelter.
28:06Bazooka?
28:07She won't be able to hide even if she's the devil himself.
28:10Crap.
28:10Oh my god.
28:11Get back, son.
28:13Ready.
28:15Hey!
28:16Oh, shit!
28:21Quit your whining and stand down.
28:35The parasite's been extracted.
28:37Shoot her dead now!
28:38Do I need to fix your hearing, too?
28:40I said stand down!
28:43Don't listen to her.
28:45She's a fraud.
28:46A termite to the field of medicine.
28:48I just saved this man that otherwise would have died in your care.
28:52If I'm a termite, then...
28:53You're worse than a disease spreading.
28:56Tick.
28:56Wait a second.
28:57Are you saying you cured my son?
29:00He'll wake in just a moment.
29:01You can see for yourself.
29:03Well, now you're just asking to be exposed.
29:06That is it!
29:07No more stalling, General!
29:08If you won't punish her, I will.
29:14Don't hurt her!
29:20He's a cure!
29:27His pulse is regular.
29:29In fact, it's never been better.
29:34There's no sign of illness, infection, or disease.
29:44Miss Trixie did it, Dad.
29:47Lysander's warm again.
29:48He's not cold and pale like before.
29:50And his heart is strong.
29:51Come, feel it.
29:54Save my son.
29:57Next time, don't go seeking medical advice from those with ill will.
30:01Your son would have otherwise died by their greedy and unskilled hands.
30:05I've learned my lesson.
30:06I will not let these two nutjobs ever practice their voodoo voodoo magic again.
30:11Wait, wait, no, no.
30:13There is only one person in the world who is more skilled in the field of medicine than
30:18the queen, Angel, and I.
30:21The goddess healer.
30:27Could you really be the goddess of healing?
30:29But rumor has it that the goddess of healing is well over 100 years old, and you don't look
30:35a day after 20.
30:37It doesn't matter who I am.
30:38What matters is that the patient is healthy again.
30:41Devon, I've repaid your kindness by fulfilling your wish of saving your brother.
30:45Take care.
30:46No, wait.
30:48Miss Trixie, we still haven't fulfilled our promise to you yet.
30:50He's right.
30:52We are men of our words, and as I promised you, my heir, Lysander, would take you as
30:56a wife if you cured him, and you did just that.
30:59Of course, you're welcome to marry me instead.
31:03I really appreciate it, but I'm sorry.
31:08I'm already engaged.
31:12Already engaged?
31:14I am.
31:14I've been patiently awaiting his return from deployment for the last three years, and he's
31:19coming back today.
31:20But don't be disappointed.
31:22Really, I'm no one special.
31:25I just got lucky with your brother.
31:27Some guru taught me that spa water can cure all kinds of ailments.
31:30But you're still Lysander's savior.
31:32Please, let me give you what I promised.
31:34Take the gold.
31:35No, really.
31:37I don't need anything.
31:39I just believe in doing good in the world.
31:45Trixie?
31:45It's your fiancé.
31:47He's back.
31:48And he says he's breaking up with you.
31:52I must go.
31:59Hobo close.
32:01Halo glow.
32:02I bet the goddess healer is just like Miss Trixie.
32:05It was just dumb luck.
32:08She's even dumber for not accepting his marriage proposal.
32:10She could have been the richest woman in the world, marrying the hottest, most powerful
32:15bachelor around.
32:19I'm going to marry that homeless woman.
32:25Oh my god.
32:27I mean, I don't know about that homeless bimbo, but this is godly.
32:32No, no, no, no, no, Lysander.
32:35My third job is not what's supposed to be mine.
32:39I'd so much rather share with you than let that panty-like ugly bitch have him.
32:44You two nut jobs are a disgrace to your profession.
32:47Take these two weirdos out of here and revoke their license.
32:50Please.
32:51No.
32:51We're not brides.
32:53No, she's just better than us.
32:59We were truly blessed to have Miss Trixie here, huh?
33:02She's no average Jane.
33:04No, she isn't.
33:05She said it was just dumb luck.
33:07But if she truly had these special skills, why did she wear that shit-stained dress and
33:12had an impeccable-looking doll?
33:13But think about the impenetrable walls.
33:15No normal person could have done that.
33:17Goddess or not, homeless or not, I don't care.
33:20I have never met a woman like that.
33:22I have to find her.
33:23I have to make her my life.
33:24She went my heart over, too.
33:26But if my bestest big bro wants her, I'll help you find her.
33:30All right, listen.
33:31I need help finding three wedding gifts.
33:38I'm dumping Trixie, so I want you, your granddaughters, filthy things, out of my house.
33:46Now, Trixie paid for this house.
33:48She waited for you for three years.
33:52She was dumb enough to put my name on the lease, and I'm upgrading for a better girlfriend now.
33:56One with some serious fuck you money.
33:59So get lost.
34:01Who gave you permission to bark like a rabbit hyena in my house?
34:10Grandma.
34:11Beatrice, Trixie, I'm already.
34:14I've been dying to throw this in your face.
34:17I'm dumping you for your best friend, Marissa.
34:20In fact, the wedding's tomorrow, so sign over the house now.
34:31You gave me this ring and asked me to wait.
34:34And I did.
34:35For three years while you were deployed.
34:38Yet you cheat on me with my best friend, and now you're trying to swindle my home?
34:43Do you have no shame?
34:45We were together for three years, and it was a complete waste of my life when I could have been
34:50with a loaded girl like Marissa.
34:57That's how much she would owe me if I was in the rent-a-boyfriend business.
35:02I see you're fulfilling your highest aspirations of being a low-grade male prostitute.
35:11Oh, yeah?
35:13Marissa?
35:15It's so much better than you.
35:16She grew up even poorer than you, and now she's the CEO of an entire corporation.
35:25Oh!
35:27And you?
35:29You're still nothing.
35:31So you think she's an upgrade?
35:33Of course she's an upgrade.
35:35But she got me for my engagement.
35:39Oops.
35:40Yeah.
35:41That's maybe worth one millionth of the presidential contract I gave her.
35:51You gave her the presidential contract?
35:53I certainly did.
35:54In fact, Marissa, you and your dimwint brother only have everything you have all thanks to me.
36:06Oh, I think she's losing it, bro.
36:08That breakup is going to hit her hard.
36:11You two are the ungrateful, cheating scum here.
36:15My granddaughter supported you and your entire family for three years while you were gone.
36:22How dare you insult her?
36:24It's okay, Grandma.
36:26Let's not stoop to that one.
36:29We're at nothing.
36:30She still doesn't know what you're doing out there on the streets, huh?
36:33What is he talking?
36:46Show her, Bob.
36:52This is how embarrassingly useless your granddaughter is.
36:56She didn't purchase this house on her own.
36:58She was begging on the street for money.
37:02I can't be caught with a piss-poor nobody like you.
37:05Even if you got no game, I got street cred that got out of the game.
37:08You dig?
37:09The word you're looking for is dignity.
37:12And you're one to speak, cheater.
37:16Is this true, Trixie?
37:20I've been broadening my horizons, Grandma.
37:23I want to see how regular, everyday people live so that I can help them.
37:27Of course, those without substance underneath would never understand that.
37:32What is that supposed to mean?
37:34It means that your girlfriend you think is an upgrade is actually a downgrade.
37:43Enough bullshitting already.
37:44Just sign the damn papers and we can each get on with our lives.
37:59At your wedding, I will.
38:01What?
38:03If you won't do good by me of breaking things off before two-timing you with my best friend,
38:08why should I do good by you?
38:10I'll give you my John Hancock at your wedding as my charity to you.
38:16Fucking bitch!
38:17You better keep your word.
38:18Oh, that's rich.
38:20After tomorrow, you will never feel so rich ever again.
38:23Do you remember that?
38:32Trixie, Marissa's a millionaire now.
38:34They'll destroy you if you show up even so much as a hair at their wedding.
38:38Grandma, I have to confess something to you.
38:42I've secretly amassed a fortune worth trillions.
38:45Trillions?
38:48That would make you the richest person on the planet.
38:53It's because of the healing hands I inherited from Asseplius, the god of healing.
38:58I saved several world leaders with these hands.
39:01That's how I was able to give Marissa the presidential contract and become the goddess healer.
39:06It makes me angrier hearing her name knowing how she betrayed you.
39:11But please, Trixie dear, I know it was too broken your heart, but embellishing your worth and who you are,
39:19it will only delay the healing process.
39:22You don't have to believe me just yet.
39:25After we lost mom and dad because we didn't have the money for their medical bills.
39:30I vowed that I would do everything I can to serve those in need.
39:34That's why I'm taking everything back from Butch and I'm giving it back to charity.
39:38You've always had an angel's heart.
39:41I'm certain you will meet someone who will treat you right.
39:44Who actually deserves you.
39:46You will see tomorrow, Grandma.
39:50Oh, yeah.
39:56You said Trixie's crashing at my wedding?
39:58She was bullying us too, Sasa.
40:01She's probably trying to extort you now that she knows you're rich as fuck.
40:05When nobody steps on Snake, Snake bites back hard.
40:10So let her come and embarrass herself.
40:11Mia, you mean we broadcast that video?
40:21Yes.
40:22Her cavewoman's take the 19th century tin can.
40:25She'll prop me up higher on my pedestal and the whole world sees her in her homeless mess.
40:29It's my presidential glow up.
40:31Let's turn this party into her funeral.
40:34Oh.
40:40There he is.
40:43Welcome home, brother.
40:45Welcome home, General!
40:49Sir?
40:50The homeless woman who saved you, Miss Trixie?
40:52This is the file of her ex, Butch Tanner.
40:54He served with your regiment in the Marines.
40:56You mean the Butch Tanner that could barely carry supplies?
40:59Well, she's been providing for him and his entire family while he's been deployed overseas, sir.
41:03So she waited for him for years and then he betrayed her?
41:06Fucking coward.
41:07According to intel, she's planning to bring it down on them at their wedding.
41:10Then we should join her.
41:12Men, I'm only alive today because of that virtuous woman and her incredible power that saved my life.
41:18So she needs our support.
41:20Will you join me in protecting her?
41:21Yes, sir!
41:22We will allow our lives to protect her, sir!
41:25Let's roll.
41:41Welcome, everyone, to my wedding.
41:44Today is a very special day for me and Butch.
41:46Not only are we getting married, but in just one hour, my company will be receiving the presidential contract, allowing
41:51my biomedical company to go public.
41:57Congratulations on the contract once again, Mrs.
42:00Wakeham, Stowe, Butch is taking my last name.
42:03Oh, and please don't be so tight, Secretary Cho.
42:07You are the secretary of the entire U.S. Health Department, but this is a par-tay, after all.
42:12I see some of the most important people in the nation have also arrived to celebrate you.
42:18The U.S. president will also be arriving soon to give you a contract or so.
42:24It's an honor.
42:25And that's why Sasa is the best wife a man could ever dream of.
42:30We will make sure the crowd is entertained tonight.
42:33We'll let the wedding begin!
42:37Not so fast.
42:38The party doesn't start until I...
43:00You two really are a match made in hell.
43:03So I've come to save your guests from this oncoming train wreck.
43:06I don't recognize her from any of our elite circles.
43:09Who is she?
43:10Uh, this is our entertainment for tonight, sir.
43:13Just watch.
43:17Trixie, what are you doing here?
43:18This isn't the homeless shelter you lost.
43:20I bet she's here to bum a meal off us.
43:22You know, being this poor.
43:26Me, bum a meal.
43:28Have you forgotten that it was I who bankrolled you two for the last three years?
43:32And what evidence do you have of that?
43:34Look at me, then go look at yourself in the mirror.
43:36I'm a millionaire CEO.
43:39Even the first woman president will be here any second now to congratulate me.
43:43And you're nothing but a washed-up sewer rat.
43:46Sasa, she's like so obsessed with me.
43:48She loves me.
43:50See, everyone?
43:51Butch already cut ties with his ex, but she's so shameless.
43:55And desperate that she'd still show up to my wedding to suck up to me.
44:00This is what poor, sad girls do.
44:02They beg for scraps from us, the rich and glorious.
44:07Rejecting much, Marissa?
44:08You might feel all high and mighty now, but don't bite the hand that feeds you.
44:13Especially when I'm the one who's giving you the contract.
44:20You giving me the contract?
44:23You have no skills, no education, no connection.
44:27So how could you possibly have a pool to get the U.S. fucking president to give me a billion
44:32dollar contract?
44:33We both share humble beginnings, Marissa.
44:36And I saw potential in you.
44:38Even trusted you as my best friend.
44:40But I recognize now that greed has poisoned you.
44:43Don't be all sore now just because I stole your man.
44:46This is what us rich girls do.
44:49They steal from lame spinsters for fun.
44:52Damn right.
44:53You were too embarrassing for me.
44:57Sasa tramples you any day.
44:59I can say that now that I'm marrying the rich.
45:01Bravo.
45:02Self-admission of a gold digger.
45:04Quick, somebody put that on a memoir.
45:06Sasa, she's embarrassing me in front of everyone.
45:08Julie, you're stop.
45:09Don't listen to her, everyone.
45:11She's a gold-dicking, blood-sucking leech.
45:14I don't even have to lift a finger and you're already embarrassing yourself in front of everyone for me, Butch.
45:20You may look and sound like a man, but you're nothing but a pathetic coward.
45:25Okay, enough!
45:26You know what I always couldn't stand about you?
45:28Your moral posturing.
45:30But guess what?
45:31Morals are just lies to make you and girls feel better about yourselves.
45:35That's why no man will choose you over Marissa Trixie.
45:38Because I've got the material goods.
45:41You're just all empty talk.
45:42I'm not here to request to be chosen.
45:45Because I'm the one who's doing the choosing.
45:48See this?
45:56Oh my god.
46:02Is that the billion-dollar contract for Sasa?
46:07The one that's supposed to make us all rich as fuck?
46:10No, absolutely not.
46:12I don't believe it.
46:13You all sound so scared already.
46:16Don't worry.
46:16This isn't that contract.
46:19It's the lease to the modest home you tried to swindle from me.
46:24I don't see everyone.
46:26She's just trying to bluff us.
46:27But you don't even have the guts to go all the way.
46:29Look at her following orders.
46:31I asked her to sign over the lease and here she is.
46:34Like a good little peasant slave.
46:36That house is where all her life savings.
46:42Do you want to, uh, I don't know, beg for a little treat while you're at it?
46:56You must understand me.
46:58I'm here to take back everything I've ever given you.
47:00I'm giving it to charity.
47:09Ro!
47:10She's gone cuckoo in the head.
47:12She thinks that just because she rented a pretty little dress she can pretend to be a deep pocket of
47:16us and baddie.
47:16You wish you had that kind of money to just toss away, Trixie.
47:20It's just a drop in the bucket for me.
47:22Uh, I know what this is.
47:24You've gone delusional.
47:25And you think you're Cinderella so you can just show up to a fancy party and some Prince Charming will
47:30scoop you into money forever?
47:32Well, that's not happening.
47:34Security!
47:34Lock the doors.
47:35This woman doesn't leave until we're through with her.
47:41This is where your dreams will die, bitch.
47:46We found Miss Trixie Lysander.
47:48She's being cornered by her ex and his mistress at the Wickham wedding right now.
47:51Butch Tanner.
47:52Oh, he's gonna wish he died in battle after I'm done with it.
47:55Let's go.
48:00You think a few toy guns scare me, Marissa?
48:02I've saved plenty of people from much worse.
48:06Including your head of command, Butch.
48:09General Lysander Armstrong.
48:11You mean the legendary war hero?
48:13He's been in a coma for years after he saved the nation from a terrorist attack.
48:17You're an unskilled, unemployed, ugly leech.
48:21So how could you possibly have this magical ability to heal someone like General Lysander Armstrong?
48:27No one here is gonna believe you.
48:28Have you really cured the incurable General?
48:31Then Sasa is the fucking Virgin Mary.
48:34And she's the...
48:35You're just asking to be humiliated, Trixie.
48:38Show them, Butch.
48:45See for yourselves, everyone.
48:47Trixie's just a freeloading beggar.
48:52She won't leave me and Marissa alone, because we're rich as fuck now.
48:57I'm a major in the Marines.
48:59Sasa, she has a billion-dollar biomedical contract with the military.
49:04Approved by the first female president of the United States herself, bitch.
49:09How despicable.
49:10She's just trying to leech off you like a parasitic gold digger.
49:14Get out of here.
49:15No one wants to marry you.
49:16No free meals for the poor.
49:18Do you see this?
49:19Trixie?
49:21This is high society.
49:22So you're either born on a silver spoon, or you're as accomplished as me to be here.
49:27Maybe if you do some serious dick-sucking here, maybe someone will drop a couple bucks in your tin can.
49:36I already have everything one can dream of, but I valued our friendship, Marissa, which is why I came here
49:42to give you a second chance.
49:43To see if you'd apologize and admit to your backstabbing.
49:46But no.
49:47You stooped so low, it disgusts me.
49:51Nothing is more disgusting than you standing on street corners like a bum.
49:55And who knows if you've already started offering sexual services.
50:01Well then, why don't you get on your knees for me, Trixie?
50:05My brother will never take you back.
50:07No man will marry an embarrassment like you.
50:10But make me happy?
50:12I might consider making you my personal prostitute.
50:26How dare you hit my brother?
50:28I'm never letting you leave here alive.
50:30I saw a fire or something.
50:33Don't worry, my dear.
50:35After I'm done with you, Trixie, not even the goddess of healing will be able to save you.
50:40Oh, is that so?
50:43Security!
50:45Get down on your knees and give Bob one hell of a blowjob in front of everybody here,
50:51or I'll pop so many holes in you, the men here won't know which one to fuck.
50:55I don't need to be the goddess of anything to punish you.
50:58Any of the powerful leaders I've saved before could crush you before you even touch me.
51:03Dream on!
51:05You wish General Lysander scooped you off your feet, but you weren't good enough for me.
51:09You're definitely not good enough for him.
51:11Enough!
51:12You're souring my party, so you either get the fuck out, or I'm going to shoot you.
51:19On the count of three!
51:21I think I quite like it here.
51:22Two!
51:34This wine is so delicious!
51:37Wine!
51:38Shoot!
51:41Nobody is laying a hand on my future wife.
52:02Who the hell is this?
52:07I'm sorry that I'm late.
52:08Did they hurt you?
52:10No, I'm fine.
52:12But, um, when did I become your future wife?
52:16You saved me, Trixie, remember?
52:19I'm a man of my word.
52:21They're never going to hurt you ever again.
52:23Really, it was nothing.
52:25I saved you because you're a good man, not because I want you to owe me any favors.
52:36I see what this is.
52:37You're the one who cheated on me, Trixie.
52:39Look at you guys all love me, tough.
52:41Don't try to pin this on her.
52:43She waited for you for three years.
52:44This is the kind of woman of virtue that a man would die for.
52:49Virtue?
52:51Don't make me laugh.
52:52Yeah, she's probably out there giving blowjobs for cash.
52:55No man, with a hundred foot pole, would want to touch her.
52:59She should be happy Bob was willing to give her some.
53:06I see her in the Marines.
53:09I'm a major.
53:11Look, man, I know Trixie is like, uh, I don't know, a seven.
53:15Now that she's all cleaned up, but don't waste your man on a whiny, worthless woman like that.
53:21Ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow.
53:26A real man never talks about a woman that way.
53:30You're a coward.
53:41We don't need to fight fire with fire to deal with the likes of them.
53:45You're very gracious, Trixie, you know that.
53:50You're only getting off of it because she's so kind.
53:52So you're going to do me the favor of never coming near her again.
53:54You understand?
53:55You want to fuck with me, you little dipshit?
53:57I'm a fucking major.
53:59You're probably lowest rank in the military grunts.
54:02I'll, I'll destroy you.
54:04Do you really not know who this is, Butch?
54:06I thought you were in the Marines.
54:08What have you been doing this whole time if you don't know who this war hero is?
54:12He was just a supply boy.
54:16War hero?
54:18Is this all part of your plan, Trixie?
54:21Poor girl.
54:22Did you sell your house to hire this actor so you can feel better about yourself?
54:26A woman's worth is tied to the man she marries.
54:28And Trixie is worthless because that guy looks like a cowboy.
54:35A bum girl and a pimp.
54:37What a pair.
54:39It seems like they don't know who you are since you've been out of action for so long.
54:43I think we should try to lay some off some more, don't you think?
54:47Bring in the wedding gifts.
54:56What is all this?
54:57Trixie, listen.
54:58I know that you didn't ask for anything after you saved my life.
55:02But I know that we shared a moment.
55:07I'm not the kind of man to get close to a woman and then just disappear.
55:11It's not in my nature.
55:13Unlike somebody else here.
55:16Listen, Trixie.
55:17Trixie, I have never met a woman like you.
55:23So incredible and kind and beautiful.
55:26So I know that you're the one for me.
55:30This guy's either nuts or a really, really good actor.
55:35Oscar worthy.
55:36Oscar worthy.
55:38No.
55:39First gift.
55:44Trixie, I know that you just lost your home.
55:47So I'm gifted you with your own new mansion.
55:50Worth $500 million.
55:52Previously owned by Jennifer.