- vor 12 Stunden
- #familydrama
- #darkstory
- #childpain
- #truthtoolate
- #emotional
“Red means lie. Green means truth.” That was the rule in her house. But when the bracelet marked her as a liar, her own mother stopped believing her. Locked away in pain and silence, she was abandoned when she needed love the most. Days later, the truth finally comes out… but by then, it may already be too late.
#familydrama #darkstory #childpain #truthtoolate #emotional
#familydrama #darkstory #childpain #truthtoolate #emotional
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00:01not because I actually lied but because of this thing on my wrist the Verity
00:06band mom was obsessed with science-based parenting so when my twin
00:12sister Emma and I were born she strapped these bands on us green light means
00:17truth red light means you're manipulating reality Emma's band always
00:22green she could literally cut up mom's designer dress and blame the cat and
00:27that little device would glow like a Christmas tree she'd say green light
00:32believe me I'd say mom I'm hungry and flash red light instant punishment and
00:42mom's punishment wasn't gentle no food locked in my room digital blackout no
00:49phone no Wi-Fi nothing she'd say the machine doesn't lie Stella starve now
00:55learn later and doing this for your own good after 10 years of this I started
01:01believing it too maybe I really was born wrong New Year's Eve everything changed
01:08my mom New Year's Eve everything changed mom was getting ready to take Emma to see
01:15the ball drop in Times Square and that's when the pain hit like a knife twisting in
01:21my gut I collapsed on the floor my skeletal frame curling into itself mom please it
01:29hurts the band flashed red she looked down at me disgust in her eyes nice try
01:35Stella faking sick to crash our night pathological she grabbed Emma's hand and
01:41headed for the door I wanted to scream but part of me thought maybe she's right the
01:49band is red so I must be lying I must not actually be in pain sorry mom I won't lie
01:56anymore but the pain got worse way worse New Year's the door handle turned for one
02:07second I thought she's coming back she's a doctor she'll know something's wrong hurry up
02:13the fireworks are starting Emma's waiting please something's really wrong I feel like I'm dying she
02:21glanced at my wrist red light flashing like crazy she crouched down grabbed my chin forced me Stella
02:29how long are you going to keep this up can't you just be honest stay here and think about what
02:34you've done honey should we at least leave her some food mom stood up food she has a stash of
02:42snacks she
02:43bought with stolen money she won't starve brushing off her hands like I was dirt lock the door when
02:48that band turns green we'll talk but but what soft parenting is why she's like this look at Emma her
02:57band
02:57is always green Stella's just a compulsive liar she needs discipline but my closet was empty Emma stole that
03:06money Emma ate those snacks I tried to defend myself once I didn't take it either red light three days
03:16locked up with nothing but bread and water the Emma peeked through the door made a face at me
03:22that's us we're gonna see the pretty fireworks the door locked the house went silent just me
03:31alone the pain was unbearable but I kept thinking mom's right the machine doesn't lie the band is red
03:42so I must be lying I'm not in pain I'm not in pain I'm not in pain I'm not in
03:50pain I crawled to
03:52my desk I had to write that was the rule if the band glowed red I had to pen a
03:58thousand word
03:59apology essay or mom would never let me out I am a liar I opened my journal pages and pages
04:08of
04:08apologies I'd written over the years but this time I wanted to write the truth my vision blurred I could
04:16barely see my hand shook as I wrote mom I really love you it really hurts why won't you believe
04:26me
04:26please believe me just once the moment I finished the last word the pain vanished just gone I felt light
04:37weightless I looked down I was floating and there slumped over the desk was my body motionless the
04:48Verity band still flashing red on a dead girl's wrist oh I'm dead Emma I heard laughter mom dad Emma
04:59coming through the front door tonight's fireworks were amazing especially that smiley face one just like
05:07our Emma mom's voice was so warm I'd never heard her sound like that when she talked about me I
05:14wanted to help
05:15them take off their coats that's what I always did mom I reached out to hug her my arms passed
05:22right through her
05:23body like wind she shivered why is it so cold in here is the heat off I stood there staring
05:31at my
05:32transparent hands right dead people can't hug the living should we check on Stella dad said casually
05:40she hasn't eaten if she finds me dead will she be sad will she regret it
05:56still putting on an act think I'll carry you to bed Stella you're 10 years old not 5 I screamed
06:04at
06:05her only two feet away mom I'm not playing I'm dead look at me touch me I'm freezing Emma squeezed
06:15past her held up her wrist with that smug little grin look my band's green Stella's is still red
06:23she's lying even in her dreams mom patted Emma's head that's my good girl ignore the liar let her stay
06:31there maybe she'll learn how to be honest dad peeked in should we at least put her in bed it's
06:38freezing
06:38put her in bed the parenting expert says cold treatment is the answer look at that red light
06:44she's still in full defiance mode come on we have to visit grandma tomorrow the door locked again I floated
06:52next to my corpse staring at that single point of red light in the darkness mom if you just stepped
06:59closer if you just touched my hand you'd know I was ice cold but you didn't still that night a
07:07rat
07:08crawled out of my empty closet I used to scream whenever I saw rats but now I just floated by
07:14the
07:14ceiling watching it scurry across my dead body it bit into my toe it's okay you can't feel it anymore
07:22it'll be over soon the next morning sunlight streamed through the window no warmth reached my body in the
07:30kitchen I could hear mom making breakfast the smell of bacon and eggs crept under my door my favorite but
07:38mom always said liars don't deserve meat so I only ever got steamed broccoli she was claying the pans
07:45extra loud on purpose trying to tempt me out trying to make me give in and apologize for things I
07:52never
07:52did in the old days I might have caved but I don't need food anymore Stella still hasn't come out
08:02that night Stella still hasn't come out dad asked reading his paper she is so stubborn she can eat or
08:11not I don't care Emma walked to my door and made a big show of sniffing the air then she
08:18screamed
08:18dramatically mom mom stormed over pounding on the door Stella are you an animal the bathroom is right
08:30there did you seriously go on the floor just to spite me I remembered being six I had food poisoning
08:37couldn't make it to the bathroom in time soiled my pants mom didn't help me clean up she made me
08:44stand in the yard pointed at me and told the neighbors look at this she's such a mess she can't
08:50even use the toilet by herself now she thought I was dirty again leave her mom said waving her hand
08:57like
08:57she was swatting a fly let her sit in her own stink but dad stood up frowning that smells really
09:04bad
09:05i should check could be a dead mouse or something dad please open the door i'm right here i waved
09:13my
09:13transparent arms frantically dad's hand touched the doorknob still his phone was ringing dad's face
09:21went pale what the server crashed okay okay i'm on my way honey there's an emergency at work i'll be
09:29gone for a few days wait what about Stella he was already out the door if that call had come
09:36one
09:36second later i would have been found maybe then i wouldn't have rotted alone that afternoon mom took
09:44Emma shopping the house was empty except for my corpse when they came back that night loaded down with
09:50fancy lobster and gifts the smell had gotten worse mom gagged the second she walked in
09:57stella are you trying to turn this place into a dump she didn't even open my door she grabbed
10:03duct tape and sealed the gap at the bottom you want to be disgusting fine stew in it don't stink
10:09up my house
10:10she patted her hands together satisfied then went to steam the lobster i stared at that sealed door
10:18my last shred of hope suffocated under that tape his phone was ringing by day three even the duct tape
10:25couldn't contain the smell mom was arranging fresh flowers trying to cover it up but the stench of
10:32death is unmistakable sweet rotten oily she cut a rose stem too hard a thorn pierced her hand
10:42she snapped stella she grabbed a rolling pin from the kitchen storm toward my room i'm done with you
10:50you disgusting little brat time you learned what real pain feels like don't come in mom please i'm
10:58decomposed you'll be scared even though she never loved me i didn't want her to see me like that
11:05but she ripped the tape off jammed the spare key in the lock bang the door flew open the smell
11:15hit her
11:16like a wall she stumbled back dry heaving stella what are you doing by day three she saw me
11:25still slumped over the desk back turned not moving to her this was the ultimate rebellion
11:34i'm talking to you she marched over raised the rolling pin but stopped she wanted to see my face
11:42first wanted to see my defiant expression get up the moment she touched me she froze through the thin
11:52fabric her hand didn't feel warm flesh what but momentum carried her forward she yanked my body stiff
12:01as a board toppled backward taking the chair with it and there was my face on my blackened wrist
12:09the verity band hung lifeless my journal slid off the desk fell open at mom's feet the last page stared
12:18up at her mom my stomach really hurts the band is broken i'm not lying please don't punish me
12:28she saw me mom screamed not a human sound a raw guttural shriek that tore through her throat
12:37she stumbled backward slammed into the bookshelf a vase shattered but she didn't seem to feel the pain
12:44she just stared at me eyes wide unblinking no no no no this is makeup special effects
12:51stella get up i'm not mad anymore stop scaring me her hand reached out trembling to touch my arm
12:59the second her skin made contact with my corpse she recoiled like she'd been burned
13:04that cold was too real mrs lisa from next door 9-1-1 i heard a scream she'd heard the
13:10screaming
13:11when she saw what was in my room she collapsed in the hallway within minutes sirens police a medical
13:18examiner they pulled up the crime scene tape cameras flashed over my body mom sat on the couch a female
13:26officer's hand on her shoulder she was babbling she was faking she always lies the band was red machines
13:34don't lie i was just teaching her i was doing it for her own good no one responded they all
13:41looked at
13:42her like she was a monster the medical examiner crouched next to my body he muttered under his breath
13:49severe malnutrition organ failure this kid was starved for at least a month he carefully tried
13:55to remove the verity band but it had fused damn he cursed he had to use tools to pry it
14:04off even dead
14:05my soul flinched
14:13mom a cop picked up my journal put on gloves started reading mom's eyes locked onto that book
14:22suddenly she lunged for it that's her confession she admits she lied look she wrote it herself
14:29the officer pushed her back slid the journal into an evidence bag we'll determine what's true that's
14:35when dad got home he saw the black body bag being wheeled out on a stretcher saw the long zipper
14:41that
14:42sealed away my entire life his legs gave out he collapsed wet himself emma stood nearby sobbing in confusion
14:53she pointed at the blood-stained verity band on the evidence table why is stella's band black mine's
15:00still green see she held up her wrist the green light blinked cheerfully it was grotesque
15:09the cops started questioning mom in the living room she grabbed the verity band off the table like it
15:15was a life raft test it that band proved she was lying red light means lie i never abused
15:22her the machine told me i was just educating her the officer looked at her like she'd lost her mind
15:29ma'am the victim shows signs of extreme malnutrition that's discipline that's teaching
15:36her to be honest mom was shrieking now then she did something insane you don't believe me fine i'll wear
15:45it i'm not lying watch it'll be green she snatched the band still stained with my blood and bits of
15:52skin
15:53and jammed it onto her own wrist click locked the rubber pressed against her skin sticky cold she took
16:04a deep breath and tried to calm herself she needed to prove she was innocent needed to prove her parenting
16:12was right she held up her wrist eyes wild watch i'm rachel i'm stella's mother that's a fact absolute
16:21truth the red light exploded bright violent like a fresh wound tearing open mom's confident expression
16:32shattered she slapped the band like it was a broken tv what no i said the truth i am rachel
16:41she started talking faster panic rising in her voice it's broken the examiner broke it let me try again
16:49i never abused her i did it for her own good i love her the red light flashed faster and
16:56suddenly
16:56she remembered me 10 years old getting the maximum punishment curled on the floor biting my lip so i
17:05wouldn't scream is this what it felt like mom lost it completely she started screaming at the band spit
17:14flying why is it red i'm telling the truth turn green you piece of junk you're framing me but the
17:22red light
17:23kept flashing like it was mocking her you're a liar you're a liar you're a liar the dad couldn't take
17:33it
17:34anymore this man who'd been invisible for 10 years who always stayed out of it he snapped he lunged at
17:42mom
17:42and slapped her across the face you monster what did you do that was your daughter you treated her like
17:50an animal mom fell to the floor blood at the corner of her mouth but she didn't fight back didn't
17:58cry
17:58she just stared into space muttering not my fault not my fault then her eyes landed on emma cowering in
18:07the corner it's her it's emma emma's band was always green emma was the good one if it wasn't for
18:15that
18:15green light making me trust her i wouldn't have believed the red light so much this is emma's fault
18:21all eyes turned to emma that little princess we'd all protected the cop walked over gently removed the
18:29green verity band from her wrist took out a screwdriver pried it open right there crack the plastic shell
18:37split inside no sensors no chips no heart rate monitor just two cheap led lights and a watch battery
18:47the circuit was hardwired power on green light that's it this is a two dollar toy your younger
18:55daughter's band was factory set to always be green no matter what she said did or lied about it would
19:02glow green your so-called science-based parenting was a joke a sick biased joke dad couldn't take it
19:12anymore no mom suddenly screamed she clawed at the band get it off get it off it's red i'm not
19:19a liar i'm
19:20not but the clasp was jammed from her violent struggle wouldn't budge i can't get it off stella take
19:27it back i'm sorry it's all my fault this little bit of pain and she was breaking mom i suffered
19:36for 10
19:36years the cops needed evidence for charges and you better so they opened my journal in front of my
19:42parents february 14th sunny mom put celery on my plate i'm allergic my throat swells i can't breathe
19:51i said i can't eat it but because i was scared of making her angry my heart raced red light
19:58mom said
19:59i was picky lying made me eat the whole plate that night i threw up blood my throat felt like
20:07it was
20:07on fire mom saw it and said i'd snuck tomato juice that i was faking she punished me for 10
20:14more minutes
20:14mom's hand flew to her mouth she was shaking violently she remembered that night the officer
20:21turned the page june 1st children's day emma cut up mom's dress emma's heart rate is always
20:29slow green light i tried to explain but i was scared of getting beaten so my heart raced red light
20:38dad couldn't take it anymore this man who'd been invisible for 10 years who always stayed out of it
20:44he snapped dad couldn't take it anymore this man who'd been invisible for 10 years who always stayed
20:54out of it he snapped he lunged at mom and slapped her across the face you monster what did you
21:01do that
21:02was your daughter you treated her like an animal mom fell to the floor blood at the corner of her
21:09mouth
21:10but she didn't fight back didn't cry she just stared into space muttering not my fault not my fault
21:18then her eyes landed on emma cowering in the corner it's her it's emma emma's band was always
21:27green emma was the good one if it wasn't for that green light making me trust her i wouldn't have
21:32believed the red light so much this is emma's fault all eyes turned to emma that little princess we'd all
21:40protected the cop walked over gently removed the green verity band from her wrist took out a screwdriver
21:48pried it open right there crack the plastic shell split inside no sensors no chips no heart rate
21:57monitor just two cheap led lights and a watch battery the circuit was hardwired power on green light
22:05that's it this is a two dollar toy your younger daughter's band was factory set to always be green
22:13no matter what she said did or lied about it would glow green your so-called science-based parenting was
22:22a joke a sick biased joke dad could i laughed laughed until i cried turns out ghosts can cry too
22:34the officer turned to the last page of the journal her voice broke the handwriting was a mess
22:41clearly written while dying mom if i die will the band stop glowing red or if it turns green
22:50will you hug me then i'm not lying my stomach hurts so much like knives next life please don't make
23:01me
23:01wear the band please mom stared at the shattered pieces of plastic on the table that green light
23:08she trusted without question a cheap piece of junk mom started laughing her voice cracking with every sound
23:19but it was the laugh of someone breaking worse than crying fake all fake i killed my honest daughter
23:27and i worshipped a liar she'd lost her mind for real this time
23:35i love my death became front page news mrs lisa the neighborhood gossip posted everything online
23:44title girls starved to death by fake science band she described my corpse in detail
23:51the band fused to rotting flesh the internet exploded monster murderer she doesn't deserve to be a mother
24:02comments poured in like an avalanche someone doxxed mom our address got leaked people threw red paint on our door
24:12wrote death in huge letters dad got arrested too neglect failure to protect he wasn't there when i died
24:21so he got off light but his company fired him immediately to avoid the pr nightmare our family went bankrupt
24:30sold the house the car everything to pay legal fees dad couldn't stand living with that psycho anymore
24:39he took what little money was left and emma and disappeared emma was a bad seed sure but she was
24:47still his
24:47blood before they left emma tried to take her green band dad stomped on it why the hell would you
24:55want
24:55that piece of trash emma cried as he dragged her away my dad mom got out on bail the psych
25:03eval said she had
25:04severe ptsd and psychosis they left her alone in that rental apartment the one that still smelled like
25:11death her mental state deteriorated fast she started talking to me like i was still there and she refused
25:19to take off the red light band to punish herself she'd added a shock device to it one that delivered
25:26a jolt the second the light flashed red she said the small shocks were the only thing that eased her
25:32guilt
25:33she'd cook a whole table of food then talk to the empty air she'd pick up a piece of meat
25:39her hands
25:40shook the band flashed red she was anxious she smiled but her eyes were empty mom's heart is racing mom's
25:51lying liars don't deserve food picked up a remote one she'd rewired to trigger the shock on her wristband
26:01it hurts it hurts it hurts is this what stella felt i'm sorry mom got out mom started reenacting my
26:10diary
26:11entries i couldn't eat celery because of my allergy so she forced herself to eat spoiled food until she
26:18vomited blood then swallowed it back down i was locked in isolation so she locked herself in
26:26my old room lights off and bowed to my photo until her forehead bled over and over blood on the
26:35floor
26:36late at night she'd see the red glow of the band reflected on the wall
26:40to her it looked like my bloody eyes watching she scribbled in red pen on the back of my journal
26:47i'm sorry i was wrong red light means pain red light means love please come back and say it hurts
26:56one
26:56more time i'll save you i promise too bad i'm dead dead people can't cry for help eventually the state
27:06intervened mom's self-harm got so extreme she nearly killed herself that they committed her she ended up
27:15in a psychiatric facility she was the strangest patient there she'd found a red plastic ring somewhere
27:23and wore it around her neck like a collar her homemade band if anyone tried to remove it she'd bite
27:31them
27:31like a rabid dog don't touch my light stella's watching she'll be mad if you take it she developed
27:38a pavlovian response rachel time to eat mom would touch her neck then start convulsing screaming red light
27:47red light don't punish me i'll eat i'll eat even if the food was scalding hot she'd gulp it down
27:54burning her esophagus wouldn't spit it out she was reenacting my final moments living my hell on repeat
28:04mom started reenacting my diet years later emma grew up without proper guidance and with a trail of
28:11infamy behind her she ended up at the bottom of society when she ran out of money she remembered mom's
28:18still in that facility she showed up one day not for love for cash
28:31hey crazy lady dad's dead give me your hidden stash disgusting just like your dead daughter
28:40if you don't give me money i'll pull your tubes and send you to join her for a moment mom's
28:46cloudy eyes
28:47cleared she looked at emma and suddenly remembered that band that always green toy that decade of
28:56deception it was you mom's voice was gravel you lied you're the fake green light you killed stella
29:07give her back give her back the last shred of maternal love twisted into vengeance mom lunged grabbed
29:16emma by the throat die you should have died not her you help emma thrashed but couldn't break free from
29:26a madwoman's grip orderlies rushed in sedated mom pulled her off emma stumbled out of the room terrified
29:35they're all insane she bolted for the exit
29:41a truck plowed into her she survived barely both legs shattered beyond repair
29:48wheelchair for life a total wreck meanwhile mom was strapped to a bed staring at the ceiling tears
29:56streaming in her dreams she finally saw me i was 10 again no band white dress smiling mom she reached
30:08for me crying with joy stella but her hands sparked with electricity the second she touched me i burst into
30:17flames turned to ash no she woke up screaming heart rate through the roof if she'd been wearing that band
30:26it would have been blood red eternal torment
30:31years later i stood in the void watching it all mom in the facility emma in a wheelchair begging on
30:40the streets
30:41dad drunk and dead in some gutter
30:44i felt nothing no satisfaction just a flat dead calm next to me was an old dog buddy my childhood
30:56pet mom threw him out years ago he'd been waiting for me at the boundary
31:02buddy nuzzled my leg barked twice as if to say let's go don't look back
31:10yeah time to leave this life was too bitter nothing worth holding on to
31:18i floated to mom's hospital room one final time she looked ancient hair completely white frail as paper
31:28she sensed something her cloudy eyes focused on a point in the air right where i stood
31:35stella is that you her trembling hand reached into the emptiness mom destroyed the band i don't believe in
31:43it anymore come back please i'll cook for you no celery i'll buy you new dresses not emma tears rolled
31:51down her face i looked at the red marks on her neck from the homemade band i sighed reached out
32:00my cold
32:01ghostly finger touched her forehead sleep mom in sleep there's no pain a breeze blew through the room
32:10the old journal on her nightstand flipped open the last page my dying words stared up at the ceiling
32:19but below it in shaky handwriting were new lines written by mom during a lucid moment next life let me
32:28wear the band let me be the liar punish me however you want just don't leave me i stared at
32:36those words
32:37felt nothing too late repentance means nothing to the dead mom i don't hate you anymore but i don't love
32:48you
32:48either let's not meet again i turned away buddy wagged his tail in the distance a door of light appeared
32:58the gateway to the next cycle i looked at my wrist the phantom verity band still there even in spirit
33:09form
33:10i grabbed it it shattered into stardust i felt weightless free no red light no hunger no lies
33:21just freedom i flew morning came a nurse pushed open the door rachel time for your meds no response
33:30she walked closer rachel's hand clutched the torn journal a single tear crystallized at the corner
33:37of her eye on the heart monitor the wavy line had gone flat passing through the light wasn't violent no
33:45spinning no chaos just warmth like sinking into a spring stream even the lingering ache in my soul
33:52the phantom pains started to fade buddy pressed into my palm his fur wasn't translucent anymore
33:59it was soft warm real this was the living breathing connection i'd craved as a kid come on boy i
34:08held his
34:08paw and walked toward the brightness behind me the old life faded like a worn photograph mom's final
34:14tear the red glow of the band blood on the diary pages all of it blurred dissolved i didn't look
34:22back
34:22that 10-year nightmare was finally truly over passing when i opened my eyes again i was tiny
34:31wrapped in soft blankets someone was humming a woman's voice gentle off-key but full of love
34:40her fingers brushed my cheek the scent of gardenias not the sterile hospital smell of my old mom
34:48not the cold clinical distance i blinked up at her she had kind eyes a soft smile
34:56she cradled me like i was made of glass grace is awake she murmured honey come quick our daughter
35:03just blinked a man appeared tall a little awkward but his face lit up when he saw me he touched
35:11my tiny
35:12hand with one finger his voice was deep warm hey grace i'm your dad grace not stella no weight no
35:22chains
35:22no lies just grace sterling a name that meant something light something cherished
35:30when i opened this house was small but clean cozy cartoon stickers on the walls plants on the balcony
35:40sunlight pouring through the windows warm on the floor i realized fast this family was nothing like the
35:48last one they never forced me to do anything there were no verity bands i grew learned to crawl to
35:58talk
35:59and when i was three mom made sauteed celery the green stalks on the plate triggered me i flashed back
36:06to
36:07choking throat swelling vomiting blood i stumbled backward shaking tears came without permission
36:16mom mom immediately put down the spatula crouched pulled me into a hug grace what's wrong you don't
36:23like celery i couldn't speak just shook my head sobbing dad knelt too rubbed my back hey it's okay
36:34you don't have to eat it can you tell us why their eyes were patient gentle finally i choked out
36:43it hurts my throat it hurts my throat makes me bleed they didn't say the machine doesn't lie
36:50they didn't accuse me of faking they took me to the doctor immediately turns out i really do have a
36:57celery allergy mild but it can flare up with stress after that celery never appeared in the house again
37:05mom even added it to her phone notes grace's allergies celery mango
37:10she checked every time she shopped i lay in her arms that night smelling gardenias and realized this is
37:19what it feels like to be believed love isn't measured by a machine it's listening even when the story
37:26sounds impossible this house was small when i was four preschool had a health screening blood draw i saw
37:33the needle and lost it flashes of the band burning my wrist flashes of starvation i screamed clung to dad's
37:42leg the teacher sighed grace it's just a little poke all the other kids were brave i couldn't stop shaking
37:51don't punish me i'm not lying dad immediately scooped me up shielding me from the nurse
37:58sorry he said firmly she's got trauma we'll skip this for now and take her to a pediatric psychologist
38:07on the drive home dad didn't scold me for being weak he just asked gently grace
38:14did someone hurt you before i buried my face in his shoulder tears soaking his shirt mom band red light
38:26i couldn't explain it clearly but he listened nodded you've been through hell haven't you it's okay
38:35dad's here now no one's ever hurting you again from then on they took me to a child therapist regularly
38:44severe ptsd the doctor said my parents never complained never made me feel like a burden
38:52they played honesty games with me where i could say anything true or false and they'd just listen
38:59guide me gently toward the truth they bought me colorful bracelets but never forced me to wear them
39:06these are just accessories grace wear them if you want take them off if you don't we'll love you either
39:11way
39:13slowly i started to heal i could say i don't like this without fear i could say i'm scared i
39:22could say
39:22i want that i didn't have to worry about my heart racing being evidence of a lie
39:29i started sharing my preschool stories with them i cried when i didn't get a toy i laughed when i
39:36got praise
39:37i was finally just a kid a normal loved kid when i was four when i turned seven i started
39:46elementary
39:46school there was a girl in my class annie sullivan she looked exactly like emma same eyes but her hair
39:56was shorter and she was timid scared the first time i saw her my heart clenched flashbacks emma's smug grin
40:07the green light mocking me i stepped back instinctively annie noticed she looked down
40:14voice barely a whisper i'm annie do you want to be friends her tone was so careful so desperate to
40:24please just like i used to be i glanced at her wrist she wore a cheap green cartoon bracelet
40:31my stomach turned later i found out annie's mom was strict too demanded honesty locked her in her room
40:40without food when she made mistakes one day annie accidentally broke the teacher's mug she was
40:46trembling too scared to admit it i saw her face red rimmed eyes barely holding back tears i remembered
40:55myself at that desk writing i'm a liar a thousand times i walked over took her hand annie it's okay
41:04accidents happen let's tell the teacher together she won't be mad annie looked at me shocked
41:12but mom says liars are bad kids being honest isn't about never making mistakes it's about owning up when
41:20you do and even if you tell the truth you shouldn't be punished for it if the teacher yells i'll
41:26protect
41:26you if your mom yells come to my house my parents will help i gave her the courage i never
41:34had
41:34she confessed the teacher forgave her told her to be more careful next time from that day on we were
41:41best friends when i i brought annie home to meet my parents she saw how warm they were how they
41:49didn't
41:50yell didn't punish over little things i told her you don't have to make everyone happy you're allowed to
41:59feel things say things one day annie's mom came to pick her up from school she saw us together and
42:08her
42:08face twisted she grabbed annie's hand did you mess up again is grace covering for you annie immediately
42:17looked down i stepped in front of her ma'am annie didn't do anything wrong she's a good kid
42:27you shouldn't always assume the worst she's scared of you the mom froze looked at me
42:34then at annie's tear-filled eyes her expression softened that night she called my mom thanked her
42:45you're welcome said i'd opened her eyes over time annie's mom got gentler started listening instead of
42:54yelling and annie she blossomed confident we learned about happy i watched her laugh freely one day
43:05and felt this warmth in my chest i didn't get saved in my last life i suffered alone in the
43:13dark but this
43:14time i could save someone else i could stop another stella from happening maybe that's the gift my past
43:23life gave me the ability to see pain and to heal it when i was 10 my parents took me
43:33to visit grandma
43:34in the countryside there was an old tree in her yard just like the one at my old grandma's house
43:41i sat under it watching sunlight filter through the leaves buddy does next to me then i saw her
43:49an old woman white hair hunched over a cane wearing a faded blue shirt the second i saw her face
43:57i froze
43:59she looked exactly like rachel my old mom grandma noticed me too walked over slowly her eyes were hazy
44:09but there was something familiar in them what's your name child grace sterling she repeated it softly grace
44:18that's a beautiful name she reached out like she wanted to touch my hair then hesitated pulled back
44:25like she was afraid of disturbing something sacred my mom came over studied her mom this is our daughter
44:32grace so she was my grandma in this life over the next few days grandma watched me constantly her
44:41expression unreadable one day she brought me a bowl of steak burger grace eat up this used to be your
44:48favorite i stared at the bowl in my last life i wrote in my dying breath i want to eat
44:55mom's steak burger
44:56and here was grandma saying those exact words tears blurred my vision this wasn't some distant wish
45:05anymore it was real right in front of me i picked up a piece bit into it tender sweet perfect
45:16grandma smiled a tired guilty smile that night lying in bed with buddy curled at my feet
45:23i thought about rachel's last words next life let me be the one punished just don't leave me i thought
45:32about her final tear the torn journal honestly i didn't hate her anymore hating someone is like locking
45:40yourself in the past chewing on pain forever this life's happiness had already washed away the bitterness
45:48i just felt sad when grandma stayed for a month then went back home before she left she held my
45:56hand
45:57grace live well be happy her voice was soft but heavy with meaning i nodded you too grandma i watched
46:08her
46:09walk away and i felt nothing no anger no grief the grudges of my past life were like fallen
46:17leaves blown away by the wind i wasn't stella anymore the girl trapped by a red light i was grace
46:25sterling
46:27surrounded by love free grandma at 13 i graduated elementary school got into the best middle school
46:35in the city my parents took me to the beach to celebrate i stood at the edge of the ocean
46:41wind in
46:41my hair salt on my lips i stretched out my arms feeling the freedom for a moment i saw her
46:49my ghost self
46:51floating desperate to hug someone but passing right through grace what are you thinking dad handed me a soda
47:00i smiled just i'm grateful to be alive to be with you guys mom hugged me silly girl we're the
47:12lucky ones
47:13buddy chased the waves barking joyfully i looked at my parents my dog my future i finally understood
47:23the suffering of my past life taught me to treasure this one the pain taught me what love really means
47:30i didn't need to prove i wasn't a liar anymore i didn't need to fear red lights i could laugh
47:37cry speak freely i had parents who loved me a best friend a healthy body a bright future
47:47this was the life i died wishing for at 13 that night i wrote in my journal not the blood
47:54-stained
47:54confessions of my old life this one was full of happiness growth love i wrote today i saw the ocean
48:06it's huge blue free i thought about my past self
48:13that little girl locked in a room desperate to be loved she'd never believe that i could be this happy
48:21mom and dad love me they taught me honesty and bravery annie is my best friend now she's confident
48:29and bright grandma's healthy she calls me often buddy's still a goofball always nudging my hand
48:38i don't hate anyone anymore i don't cling to the past those painful memories are like footprints in
48:46the sand washed away by waves but they taught me to cherish every step forward i know my old mom
48:55sister and dad got what they deserved and i finally broke free i found real freedom i don't want to
49:04see
49:05them again i don't want to relive that life i just want to be grace sterling simple happy loved that
49:16the ocean
49:18was beautiful life was beautiful life was beautiful i closed my journal looked out the hotel window
49:26moonlight shimmered on the water like a thousand stars buddy's breathing was soft and steady beside me
49:33i smiled this life i finally became who i wanted to be no red lights no starvation no lies
49:45just love freedom happiness and those scars from my past they became badges of survival reminders that no
49:57matter how much darkness you face if you don't give up on the light you'll find your way to warmth
50:03to freedom
50:05the road ahead is long but i'll walk it with courage with joy towards something even brighter
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