- 2 hours ago
Category
🎥
Short filmTranscript
00:15I'm Dora Miller, the ice hockey team's assistant that no one cares about.
00:20I love this job, mostly because it keeps me close to Leo, my crush since childhood.
00:43Wait, did Leo really stop to help me?
00:53I always believed that one day Leo would see me more than an assistant.
01:04You just got pucked, Dora.
01:10But back then, I had no idea how dangerous dreams could be, and how badly people could get hurt.
01:17It all started when I got an early birthday present from my parents.
01:29Happy birthday to my dearest daughter.
01:32We love you so much.
01:34I totally forgot I was only one month away from turning 18.
01:46Get with Leo.
01:47Lose my big card.
01:54You followed Leo to college for nothing.
01:58Idiot.
01:59I'm a divergent.
02:02If you want it, you're going to have to make it happen.
02:07Dora Miller, just tell Leo how you feel.
02:12Stop being such a pussy and go for it.
02:27Stop being such a pussy and go for it.
02:30Dora.
02:33Can it wait?
02:35I'm just a little busy.
02:38Leo, I have been in love with you for years.
02:41I think we would make a great team.
02:44I've been saving myself for you, and I want you to be the one to take my virginity next month
02:48before my 18th birthday.
02:58Oh my god!
02:59What did she just say?
03:00She's a virgin.
03:01L-M-A-O.
03:06How sweet.
03:08The bleeding little virgin.
03:11Oh, don't let me stop you, Dora.
03:16What else do you have to say to Leo?
03:2350.
03:24Hey.
03:25I didn't realize you were on the toilet.
03:27It's funny.
03:29Something in the toilet made me think of you, and then I heard your needy voice.
03:33I can't believe you're still a virgin.
03:38Wait.
03:39I totally can.
03:43But I do love what you've done with your hair.
03:47Oh.
03:50Don't have a mustache.
03:54I'll just...
03:55I'll leave you guys.
03:57Go.
03:57And this, uh...
04:01It's interesting.
04:06Women have a choice for...
04:09They can be appealing, or they can be you.
04:14I like this cardigan.
04:19So would my great-great-great-grandmother.
04:25Leo's hot.
04:26You're not.
04:28Leo's rich.
04:29Poor.
04:30We're in, you're out.
04:32Repeat that to yourself when you go and cry into your greasy pillow.
04:37Maybe.
04:39Know your place, nerd.
04:40In the library, open your nose with the oven.
04:44Yes.
04:51You know, if you could just, uh, finish up with some tears for my followers.
05:13What the hell?
05:14I'm not expecting money from anyone, especially this much.
05:18What the hell?
05:40Did you tell me just fall?
05:45I must leave a peace.
05:50oh come on it's not that bad i just told leo that i was in love with them but mindy
05:55was there
05:56so now the whole school's gonna know that i'm a virgin are you in there trying to slip on some
06:01guy in the shower come on i know you're in there virgin i can smell library dust and eyeglass cleaner
06:22oh troy no virgins here but you already knew that right goodbye ex-boyfriend
06:40thank you oh that's so fast you are the ignorer i saved you now you won't big time
06:56no way guys like you only want one thing such as help passing math
07:05listen i've got a really weird tech situation and i know you're good with that kind of stuff
07:10but it's got to be kept real secret if you got a virus from a corn site that's your own
07:13problem
07:15no no some stranger's putting money into my account and i'm worried they're setting me
07:19up to make it look like i'm throwing games match fixing that also sounds super dodgy i'm not
07:27touching it wait what if we did a deal you help me and i help you get leo boom swinging
07:39for fifth base
07:39in no time it's a sexual reference for you once that's sex with leo
07:49it's not just sex i love leo i've been waiting for him so do we have a deal okay but
07:59i need to clear
08:00something up fifth base i thought it was fourth you got some work to do you think i'm a joke
08:10it's called teasing do you want leo so you teach me how to flirt and you know do things
08:26you want me to teach you how to kiss to laugh
08:38i just want to know what leo will expect
08:43i'm not super familiar with this stuff
08:49all right
08:52maybe we should tackle it in order list it for me
08:56flirting fashion technique
08:58okay so you spend some time thinking about this
09:01all right flirting skills first and then boom
09:04fifth base sounds good just uh don't forget about fashion
09:08and we need a deadline how about the fundraiser dance for the hockey team
09:13you can make a big move there it's only two weeks away
09:17calm down you're not that hopeless we can meet up tomorrow morning to discuss tactics
09:23okay sounds good
09:25oh my whole life's gonna change go team
09:41dora just the person i wanted to see oh shit i wanted to say that i'm sorry about yesterday
09:50you did you did yeah i was just feeling really insecure because i really like leo
10:00i shouldn't have reacted that way
10:06thanks did you hear about the cake party that's happening tonight you should totally come
10:12all of us lost our b cards at cake parties didn't we girls totally
10:38what the hell dora do you even live here it's so freaking neat i like things organized
10:47what are you doing checking to see if your underwear is color-coded you probably have mass solution of the
10:53week on it
10:58my underwear is none of your business
11:01i mean it kind of is if you want my help landing leo
11:09can we please stop talking about my underwear
11:31just what are you doing
11:34you have such incredible eyes dora
11:39i never noticed how beautiful they are before
11:49they're just eyes
11:51i have two of them like everyone else
11:54come on dora i was flirting with you
11:57this is why i need help
12:03why couldn't i see what you were doing
12:05just be open to signals don't be dora the ignorer
12:11can i bore you
12:15why would you care
12:24because you have such beautiful eyes
12:33you're flirting again
12:36yeah you're supposed to say something flirty back
12:39something flirty back
12:45i know i will practice on leo at the party tonight
12:50what do you think
12:51why not
12:54but just remember you still got your training wheels on
12:56don't expect miracles
12:58we'll need to have another flirting lesson
13:13all right
13:15i'll grab us a drink
13:16just
13:18try to be cool
13:21dude
13:21when am i not cool
13:27oh my god there's leo
13:30oh my god there's leo
13:31you're worth a million of him but you have no idea
13:34yeah good luck
13:40oh my god
13:44oh my god
13:46hey
13:50hey
13:51hey
13:53i felt you staring at me from over there
13:56was i
14:00i'm sorry if i was weird yesterday
14:03you don't gotta say it
14:04i mean he's a bitch
14:06and you're awesome
14:08i know
14:10i know
14:11i know
14:11how long
14:20well
14:22hey
14:22hey
14:23sorry i don't need to
14:24interrupt
14:26school
14:27cool
14:28cool
14:28i'm sorry if i was being weird yesterday
14:35you don't gotta say it, it's cool
14:38oh, okay
14:42yes she does doesn't she girls whatever it is and i think it is her vagina
14:52it's like a vagina we try her we call it adora
15:02what the hell do you think you're doing
15:08we're doing nothing she needs you because you're nothing
15:16oh i thought you were talking about how much lube you need
15:20she buys an inventi size tubes how cute but with how many guys you're seeing it's probably up to
15:26trenta right
15:34don't you dare laugh
15:37it's about me all of a sudden
15:46what do you see in her
15:50dora the borer
15:52what does her bony body make your boner look bigger
15:59she's great
16:01it's as simple as that
16:05do you know what it'll do for my reputation if your first girlfriend after me is some pathetic little needy
16:10virgin
16:12why does door being a virgin bother you so much
16:17i think it's kind of sweet
16:25this is just the start you sexless ironing board
16:30get ready for the plan i have specifically for you
16:34the five minutes
16:49come on
16:49i'll tell you somewhere about it
16:57wait here i'll grab you some drinks and some snacks
17:09leo i have been in love with you for years i think we'd make a great team
17:13i've been saving myself for you and i want you to be the one to take my virginity before my
17:1818th birthday next month
17:26i don't know
17:27i don't know
17:31can you go up
17:34ready okay
17:36take my virginity
17:38take my virginity
17:39take my virginity
17:42take my virginity
17:42take my virginity
18:00please stop
18:07please let me go
18:09can you go up
18:09can you go up
18:16what are you
18:20can you go up
18:36can you go up
18:38can you go up
18:41Hopefully it doesn't see me like this.
18:46Please. Please.
18:48Go.
18:48Aw, honey. You wanna go?
18:51Please.
18:53You can go.
18:55We just wanna hear you say it.
18:58One more time.
18:59Say, take my virginity.
19:03Say it.
19:05Say it!
19:06Say it!
19:07Say it! Say it! Say it!
19:13That's enough!
19:18That's enough!
19:28And you wonder why guys keep leaving you.
19:32I don't care what anyone says.
19:34When someone starts shit with me, I always finish it.
19:39You're wrong.
19:42I'll finish it.
20:05I'll get you, too.
20:07Don't...
20:13I'll get you, too.
20:14Sorry.
20:16I'm not usually a crier.
20:19You can't let me get to you.
20:21You need to fight back.
20:23Like with a shark.
20:24You just need to punch her in the nose.
20:30Why do you care if she bullies me?
20:35You remind me of my little sister.
20:39Is she a pitiful virgin loser, too?
20:43I mean, she's eight.
20:44I really hope so.
20:48Remind you of an eight-year-old?
20:49No.
20:54Stop crying.
20:57It's all gonna be okay.
21:00Yeah.
21:02It's easy for you to say.
21:04You have to go to the hockey team.
21:07Everyone loves you.
21:11And I'm just...
21:13Dora.
21:19I have to think you're pretty great.
21:24And...
21:24And that should count for something, since I'm apparently so amazing.
21:34I thought you just said that at the party to mess with Mindy.
21:39No.
21:42I said it.
21:46Because I meant it.
21:53Because I meant it.
21:57And the worst part is...
22:00I didn't even get a chance to talk to Leo.
22:06You know there's a chance that Leo might not be into you.
22:09No matter what you do.
22:10I just have to change the way that he sees me.
22:14I just need you to give me a clear shot at the goal.
22:22Okay.
22:24We'll make it happen.
22:25If that's what you really...
22:27want.
22:32Let's do another flirty lesson.
22:35Now?
22:37It's not like we have another party to get to.
22:50Let's pretend like we're on a date.
22:52Okay?
22:55Show me some pointers.
22:56Okay.
22:59So...
23:00Flirting.
23:02You want to make...
23:04lots of eye contact.
23:07And if you can...
23:09touch them.
23:12Your arm.
23:16Your arm.
23:17I thought it was right.
23:19Everything that I...
23:21Had inside my mind.
23:25Yeah, it felt so good.
23:28Walking next to you.
23:30You said you liked me too.
23:34Sometimes I...
23:36Once I'm quiet.
23:38When you were someday...
23:44And you should...
23:45Laugh at Leo's jokes.
23:47If he makes any.
23:49Which you probably won't.
23:51And then you should...
23:52Find something special about him.
23:54To compliment him.
23:56If you think of anything.
24:05You're a really good teacher.
24:09Hey Mike.
24:12It smells so good.
24:16What does that?
24:18It just means we want to get closer.
24:30To be honest.
24:30Oh my God.
24:32That shit actually works.
24:34Ha ha ha.
24:37Ha ha.
24:41Congratulations.
24:42You just passed flirting 101.
24:45You're better at this than you thought.
24:47I know.
24:48Wait, who knew I had it in me?
24:50Just curious.
24:52Why did you say that stuff about me?
24:55Well...
24:56You...
24:57Told me to find something special.
24:58About the person I was flirting with.
25:01And you went with...
25:02I smell nice.
25:05What's wrong with that?
25:08How do you want to smell?
25:09A pair of sweaty old socks?
25:12Hockey players are tough, okay?
25:14We don't smell nice.
25:16Hey.
25:20Relax.
25:21You are still a beast on the ice.
25:24I will let your secret get out.
25:29Nobody gives me shit the way you do.
25:32I like it.
25:34Thanks.
25:37Did you happen to make a list of everyone who has access to your bank account?
25:41Yeah.
25:42It's around here somewhere.
26:04Dora's helping Troy track the money?
26:06If she works out I sent it, they'll know I'm setting up Troy to look like a match fixer.
26:10She's gonna fuck everything up!
26:18I've got to do something to keep him away from Dora.
26:26What's up with you and Dora?
26:30What's it to you?
26:31She's an old friend.
26:33Just making sure you don't take advantage of her.
26:35Yeah?
26:37Well, sounds like you're a little bit jealous to me.
26:40Dora.
26:42Hardly.
26:43She's like our team mascot.
26:46Perfect.
26:47Then I guess you shouldn't have a problem with me dating her.
27:00I wonder if Troy will like this.
27:04I don't care what Troy thinks.
27:05This is about Leo.
27:06Stupid.
27:16Going somewhere, Geek Girl?
27:21I've got a date with Troy.
27:31Is that seriously what you're wearing on a date with the captain of the ice hockey team?
27:36Where are you going? The library?
27:42I obviously did something to offend you.
27:45Everything about you offends me, Geek.
27:48The way you creep around campus sucking up to all the hot guys by becoming their pathetic little slave.
27:55I mean...
27:57Do you have any self-respect?
28:00Can I go?
28:02Well, not until I help you out a little.
28:04I mean, if you're trying to get laid, you're going about it all wrong.
28:09And these have a definite gotta go.
28:12Hey.
28:13Hey.
28:17And this partigan?
28:20So gross.
28:21Stop!
28:23And you gotta bait the hook with something.
28:37You gotta fight back.
28:39Like with a shark.
28:40You gotta punch her in the nose.
28:41No.
28:56Don't touch them.
29:01You gotta bite.
29:02Oh no.
29:03Oh no.
29:04Sorry I'm late.
29:05Yeah you should be.
29:06It's not really good for my reputation to be seen when we're a girl
29:11Also, I looked it up on chat GPT last night and said fifth base is innovative sexual intimacy
29:23It's but
29:37Yeah
29:38Just stick to fourth base then
29:47There's a crazy little bitch that's
29:50That's her! Oh Chris!
29:52Are you Dora Miller?
29:55Dora Miller you're under arrest?
29:56For aggravating assault
30:02Whoa whoa hang on a second
30:04Can we just talk about this?
30:06This young lady reported an assault and it needs to be investigated
30:09No, she's the one who assaulted me
30:11Wait, they opened my shirt and took pictures
30:17I've seen you at the rink, yeah?
30:19Yeah, I don't miss a game, you guys are crushing it this year
30:21Let's go, thanks
30:22Yeah, but you see Dora here, she's the team's assistant
30:25She's one of the main reasons we look as good as we do on the ice
30:28Yeah?
30:29No
30:30This is bullshit, this is not happening
30:34Oh really?
30:35Why don't you hand over your phone and we'll see if you have pictures of Dora in her underwear?
30:43That's what I thought
30:45Sorry for this misunderstanding
30:52Nice to meet you
30:52Hey, nice to meet you too
30:54See you in the next game
30:55You will, go team
31:03Lay hands on Dora again
31:05And you'll be dealing with me
31:07Got it?
31:19Thank you
31:20I can't believe you're recognizing him from the rink
31:23No, I've never seen him before in my life
31:26That was bullshit?
31:27It worked, didn't it?
31:30Unbelievable
31:31You know what's unbelievable?
31:33Is you punching Mindy in the face?
31:35I mean you weren't supposed to take my advice literally
31:37I don't know what happened, okay?
31:39Just one moment she was monstering me
31:41And then the next my fist was just in her face
31:45Yeah, I wish I would have been there slugger
32:10I'm calling the cops
32:12Or you can stay with me tonight
32:22I'll change my sheets
32:23And you can sleep in my bed tonight
32:27I'll take the floor
32:35I had no idea Troy was such a good person
32:38He feels so good
32:39Oh no!
32:41Am I hot for Troy?
32:51Do you have something I could change into?
32:53Yeah, of course
32:59Thanks
33:00Thanks
33:00Thanks
33:00Thanks
33:00Thanks
33:00Thanks
33:05Thanks
33:05Thanks
33:06Thanks
33:06You
33:07Thanks
33:07Thanks
33:13You're so sorry
33:14I did not realize
33:17Relax, Dola
33:19You've seen worse in the locker rooms after a freaking evening
33:21Yeah but that's, that's different
33:26You can look now
33:28You're still shirtless.
33:30That's how I sleep.
33:32But if you think you won't be able to control yourself...
33:35Dream on.
33:42What's the point?
33:44Good night.
33:46Good night.
34:16We can share the bed if you want.
34:25I trust you.
34:26A lot of people say you shouldn't.
34:29I'm not sure you like I do.
34:31You're a joke.
34:33You're gonna ruin my reputation if you go around saying stuff like that.
34:39Are you sure?
34:41We can put a pillow in between us.
34:46We might need a thicker pillow.
34:47We want...
34:49We want...
34:50We want you to...
34:51Be it.
34:52We want you to be...
34:55Baby.
34:55Cause it's the darkness all along.
35:00Cool.
35:01Look at you, baby.
35:20What happened to the pillow?
35:21Someone threw it on the floor.
35:24It wasn't me.
35:26Why would I do that?
35:28I don't know.
35:29Maybe because you want me to do this?
35:43And this?
35:52What?
35:55What?
35:58Like, you know, Leah's the one I want.
36:02You're the one who said you wanted help with fifth base.
36:06I guess you're not ready for those lessons yet.
36:09Right.
36:09Yeah.
36:10Sorry for freaking out.
36:13I just think maybe we should concentrate on, you know, fashion since the dance is tonight.
36:21Yeah, I actually need to call my cousins about that.
36:23But, yeah.
36:25Since you're better at taking off dresses and putting them on.
36:31Okay.
36:32I have an American history exam I got to get to, so I'm going to.
36:42Hey, what's up?
36:44What's up, dude?
36:47So, her door punched Mindy.
36:50It's unhinged, man.
36:52Trust me, dude.
36:54Mindy deserved it.
36:57You got to kick her to the curb, bro.
37:02Why are you so down on Dora?
37:04Isn't she your friend?
37:05Of course she is, but we have the most important game of the year coming up, and you need to
37:10be more focused.
37:12I'm focused.
37:13Okay, don't worry about me.
37:15Doesn't look it.
37:16When you should be worrying about impressing all the pro scouts coming, you're running around with Dora all the time.
37:26Leo!
37:27Hey!
37:30I'm going to wash this.
37:32Get it back to you.
37:36Mindy trashed Dora's room, so she stayed here last night.
37:40Wow.
37:42Are you that desperate to get laid?
37:57Stop it. Stop.
38:00Troy is just a friend.
38:05It's nice to know what you really think of me.
38:06I was just looking out for you.
38:08Troy's the biggest player on campus.
38:10You're a virgin.
38:12I just didn't want you to get hurt.
38:15Thanks, man.
38:20There's nothing happening between us.
38:23Don't say that more, do you?
38:25Thanks, buddy.
38:27Great chat.
38:29Go, team.
38:31Go, team.
38:31Go, team.
38:33Go, team.
38:33Go, team.
38:35Go, team.
38:38Excuse me.
38:43The boss wants an update.
38:49Hey, Big Mike.
38:50How's it hanging?
38:53Right.
38:55Nothing.
38:57So everything's set to where we lose the big match, except Troy's trying to figure where
39:02the money comes from.
39:07Then you'd better make sure that does not happen.
Comments