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Short filmTranscript
00:00:00Open up!
00:00:17Just gonna try to take Carlos.
00:00:19Excuse me.
00:00:20Oh, yo, I was looking for some old lady.
00:00:23You got some old lady living in here?
00:00:25No, no old ladies here.
00:00:27I'm gonna kill that pendejo, man.
00:00:30All right, mamacita, let me ask you something.
00:00:32You ever heard of something called the, uh, Black Forest?
00:00:36Doesn't ring a bell.
00:00:37Doesn't ring a bell.
00:00:40Check out the coffin table, Waddo.
00:00:45You know, maybe it's just me.
00:00:47But I don't like it.
00:00:49When no pretty...
00:00:51...tries to play me for a fool, hmm?
00:00:54What is this?
00:01:00Yeah.
00:01:00This don't look like no grow house I ever seen.
00:01:02What's a grow house?
00:01:06What's a grow house?
00:01:09Where is your crop?
00:01:11It's in the basement.
00:01:14Boy, you don't want to go there.
00:01:17Oh, I want to go there.
00:01:19But see, right now, you're not going to tell me what I want to do.
00:01:23So why don't you take me down to the basement?
00:01:27There you go.
00:01:43Nana, you open the door.
00:01:46We're getting a whole 50 cent tour.
00:01:48Now, as you wish.
00:02:07This used to be a funeral home.
00:02:10That's a fair of all the bodies.
00:02:18The last tenants made this room into a wine cellar.
00:02:46But I don't want to drink wine.
00:02:49And this is where I let my little darlings spread their roots.
00:02:58What kind of place is this?
00:02:59Old bomb shelter that I just recycled for my needs.
00:03:04Damn, Mommy.
00:03:05How do you get these plants to grow so big?
00:03:08Magic.
00:03:10And, of course, just a little bit of my own special plan.
00:03:13Fertilizer to get it going.
00:03:25Speaking of which,
00:03:27I know just what it needs to make it the best crop ever.
00:03:39Check it out, Holmes.
00:03:41Get the jackpot.
00:03:45And you're going to harvest them.
00:03:47They're not ready yet.
00:03:48They might be big, but they're not mature.
00:03:50Huh.
00:03:52Huh.
00:03:53Well, guess what?
00:03:55I tell you when to harvest.
00:03:59I don't think so.
00:04:02Thrawn.
00:04:03You know, there's a little rumor going around.
00:04:30Manny said that you told him
00:04:35he wanted me to take my dentures out
00:04:37and do something nasty to you.
00:04:39Now, could that be true?
00:04:41You crazy.
00:04:43It's just not on the menu tonight.
00:04:48What a bummer.
00:04:50That is something.
00:05:13Manny, what the...
00:05:24Manny, what the...
00:05:24That is something.
00:05:50I don't know.
00:05:53I don't know.
00:06:23All magic comes at a price.
00:06:53All magic comes at a price.
00:07:23All magic comes at a price.
00:07:53All magic comes at a price.
00:08:23All magic comes at a price.
00:08:25All magic comes at a price.
00:08:27All magic comes at a price.
00:08:31All magic comes at a price.
00:08:41All magic comes at a price.
00:08:43All magic comes at a price.
00:08:45All magic comes at a price.
00:08:47All magic comes at a price.
00:08:51All magic comes at a price.
00:08:53All magic comes at a price.
00:08:57All magic comes at a price.
00:08:59All magic comes at a price.
00:09:01All magic comes at a price.
00:09:03All magic comes at a price.
00:09:05All magic comes at a price.
00:09:07All magic comes at a price.
00:09:09All magic comes at a price.
00:09:11All magic comes at a price.
00:09:13All magic comes at a price.
00:09:15All magic comes at a price.
00:09:17All magic comes at a price.
00:09:19All magic comes at a price.
00:09:21All magic comes at a price.
00:09:23All magic comes at a price.
00:09:25All magic comes at a price.
00:09:30What do you mean? Very smooth, very mellow, very well. Where'd you get it?
00:09:40Manny, Manny, he's handing out samples. Some little old lady in Pasadena is growing it in her basement.
00:09:47She's the little old lady from Pasadena. You know the Beach Boys?
00:09:56Oh, yeah, exactly. Anyway, she's like the sweet old little granny.
00:10:02Oh, I love it.
00:10:04Oh, baby, wait to hear music on this. It is unbelievable.
00:10:09Oh.
00:10:19Ansel, we're off to spend the weekend with the Stiltskins. Keep an eye on your sister. Love mom and dad.
00:10:29That's great, guys. I have nothing better to do.
00:10:35Gretel? Gretel!
00:10:39Oh, I see what you mean.
00:10:43Yeah, I see all those three notes right there, how they call me a cord.
00:10:47Is that what they're doing?
00:10:50It's awesome, huh? Somehow.
00:10:53Um, yeah.
00:10:55What are you guys doing?
00:10:59Dude.
00:11:01We're watching music.
00:11:03Oh.
00:11:05Watching music.
00:11:07Sounds cool.
00:11:09Unrelated question.
00:11:11What do you smell?
00:11:13It's called Black Forest.
00:11:15What, like the cake?
00:11:17Cake?
00:11:19Cake?
00:11:21No.
00:11:22Not just, not just any cake.
00:11:25Guys.
00:11:26Black Forest cake.
00:11:33Okay.
00:11:34Delicious maraschino cherries trapped between layers and layers of dark chocolate cake.
00:11:43Cherry filling and Bavarian cream.
00:11:47Oh, Bavarian cream.
00:11:49Uh, speaking of which, uh, you wouldn't happen to have any Black Forest cake, would you, Hansel?
00:11:59No, I thought, I thought you guys had some.
00:12:03Oh, dude.
00:12:04Oh, no.
00:12:05What are we gonna do now?
00:12:07You know what?
00:12:11I'm pretty sure we got some gingerbread cookie mix in the kitchen.
00:12:17Gingerbread.
00:12:18Gingerbread, man.
00:12:20I haven't had those since I was a kid.
00:12:22You can bake a whole army of gingerbread men to fight your munchies.
00:12:26A whole army, damn it.
00:12:28And you can ask them anything, but they won't tell you a thing.
00:12:34Huh?
00:12:37Never mind.
00:12:38We need gingerbread men.
00:12:40Come on.
00:12:47Stoners.
00:12:48Got it.
00:12:53Sweet.
00:12:54It's a mix.
00:12:56Wait, so we have to make it?
00:12:58No problem.
00:12:59We got everything we need.
00:13:04Dude.
00:13:05Dude.
00:13:06Höflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflflfl
00:13:36Uh, yeah, um, I understand you have some s*** for sale?
00:13:55So, you're really gonna have to speak up.
00:13:59Uh, I hear you, you're selling s***.
00:14:02Again, you're really gonna have to speak up.
00:14:06What do you need? What do you need?
00:14:09No, uh, what do you need?
00:14:14Police!
00:14:16No.
00:14:16Police!
00:14:17I'm sorry, I'm sorry, oh Jesus, oh no, Jesus Christ!
00:14:20I guess, yeah, come on in.
00:14:25Well, come on, someone never, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on.
00:14:28Move.
00:14:29Jesus.
00:14:33Here you go, dearie. Just a little bit of black forest right here.
00:14:56In Pasadena.
00:14:58Oh, um, the black forest, that's in Germany, right?
00:15:02And they say American education has just gone to par.
00:15:07Should we smoke some?
00:15:08Oh, um, actually, I was just hoping to buy.
00:15:12Oh, you're not gonna just let a little old lady smoke all by herself.
00:15:18Uh, no, no, I guess not.
00:15:21Oh, this is smooth, bud.
00:15:27Not so bad, huh?
00:15:29Mm-hmm.
00:15:29Agreed.
00:15:33So, um, did you just move here?
00:15:36Well, actually, very recently, in my line of business, I like to move pretty sporadically.
00:15:47So, um, speaking of which...
00:15:49Which?
00:15:51Yeah, yeah, speaking of which, like, how did you get into the growing business?
00:15:57I love to get...
00:15:59Speaking of which, you gotta have the munchies.
00:16:03Oh, yeah, big time.
00:16:05I've got some sardines.
00:16:08Oh.
00:16:08It'll just take me a few.
00:16:11Okay.
00:16:16Oh, what about that gingerbread over there?
00:16:18Don't touch me, gingerbread house.
00:16:22Okay.
00:16:35Oh, my God.
00:16:57Oh.
00:16:59I don't know.
00:17:29I don't know.
00:17:59It smells good.
00:18:03What is it?
00:18:05Shea butter with 11 herbs and spices.
00:18:08Jesus, what the f***?
00:18:12Not simmer.
00:18:14Otherwise, you're gonna bruise.
00:18:16Okay, uh, Miss Agnes, look, I get it.
00:18:27You're lonely, and the f*** got you all horned up, but I got a girlfriend.
00:18:33You smell good.
00:18:36Almost even good enough to eat, but I think I'm gonna have to just wait a little while.
00:18:42Wait, waiting, waiting is good.
00:18:44Yeah.
00:18:44Wait, how long exactly are you thinking?
00:18:48Because I gotta get back.
00:18:50She's waiting for me.
00:18:51Yeah, everything's good to cook in its own sweet, beautiful time.
00:18:57Okay, um, what if I, like, just let you lick my junk, but that's it.
00:19:02Nothing else.
00:19:03What if I want to eat your junk?
00:19:12Swallow them?
00:19:14Okay, that's different.
00:19:16Um, but I don't want to watch.
00:19:20Okay.
00:19:26As you wish.
00:19:34So, where's the stoner genius?
00:19:37He went to get more w***.
00:19:39Him?
00:19:40No.
00:19:40I don't buy that for a second.
00:19:42You know, you could be a little nicer to him.
00:19:45Why would I do that?
00:19:46Because he's my boyfriend.
00:19:48Oh, yeah, uh.
00:19:51Speaking of which,
00:19:53what is it exactly you see in that guy?
00:19:56He doesn't judge me.
00:20:04Well, those are gonna be ready.
00:20:05Fifteen minutes.
00:20:08Oh, shoot, we're out of milk.
00:20:10He can't have cookies without milk.
00:20:11You can call Ashton and have him pick something up on his way back.
00:20:13Good idea.
00:20:14I told you not to eat the gingerbread.
00:20:21Don't eat the gingerbread.
00:20:27Please, please, please, please let me go.
00:20:29I swear I won't tell you what I swear to you.
00:20:32Yeah, well, I wish I could.
00:20:35I still got the monkeys.
00:20:45Damn.
00:20:45You look really good, Sam.
00:20:48Thanks.
00:20:49It's really even better.
00:20:51Ash back with that milk?
00:20:52No, and I've left him like a dozen messages.
00:20:55You don't think he got arrested or anything, do you?
00:20:59No.
00:21:00I just smoked out and forgot where we live.
00:21:02Whatever.
00:21:03You aren't gonna post that, are you?
00:21:08No.
00:21:09There's a life outside of the internet, you know.
00:21:23Oh, God.
00:21:27Oh, God is right.
00:21:30They're delicious.
00:21:33Ash, why haven't you called me back?
00:21:57Hey, watch where you're going.
00:22:10Up yours, lady.
00:22:12What did you just say?
00:22:15Excuse me, I would like to apologize on behalf of my little brother.
00:22:19He should think before he speaks.
00:22:21Yeah, he should.
00:22:22And please take into consideration that he's only five years old.
00:22:24Yeah, and only five years old and what he meant to say was, blow it out your pie, you nasty
00:22:29whole bag.
00:22:30Up yours again, lady.
00:22:31Manny, where's Ashton?
00:22:47Oh, whoa, whoa, whoa.
00:22:51Whoa, you gotta chill out.
00:22:52What's going on?
00:22:53I'm looking for Ashton.
00:22:54He's not home and he hasn't answered any of my calls or texts.
00:22:57Last time I checked, my boy was a...
00:23:00Is she always so intense?
00:23:05Oh, yeah.
00:23:06She's got major control issues when she's not stunk.
00:23:09She's totally killing my bubs.
00:23:11I was thinking the same thing.
00:23:13Oh, Bobby, we're already thinking alike.
00:23:15Hello, still standing here.
00:23:19Right.
00:23:21I'm her.
00:23:21What do you want?
00:23:24Manny, where's Ashton?
00:23:27Didn't I take this quiz already?
00:23:29Really, Manny?
00:23:30Really?
00:23:30Try a good one, baby.
00:23:31Give it to me.
00:23:32Baby, that's so good.
00:23:34You're f***ing.
00:23:35Manny, Manny, focus.
00:23:37Please.
00:23:39No, I haven't seen him.
00:23:42Thanks for frigging nothing.
00:23:43He did call me last night, though.
00:23:46What did you talk about?
00:23:48He wanted Agnes' address.
00:23:52Agnes?
00:23:52Who's Agnes?
00:23:53Oh, she's this sweet little old lady, man, but she's got this killer...
00:23:56Black horse.
00:23:57Baby, that's what we're smoking, right?
00:23:59Yeah, that's right, baby.
00:24:00Damn.
00:24:01You got a good memory, mamacita.
00:24:03Focus, Manny.
00:24:06Okay.
00:24:06Uh...
00:24:08Okay, I don't know.
00:24:10He's probably smoking.
00:24:11He's crawling in front of her house.
00:24:13I warned him.
00:24:14That's some sick...
00:24:16Text me her address.
00:24:22Tell her Manny sent you, okay?
00:24:26All right, where will we, baby?
00:24:27Come here.
00:24:29Hold on.
00:24:41Where are you going?
00:24:42Have a life.
00:24:44All right, see you guys.
00:24:46Can you take me to Pasadena?
00:24:48What's in Pasadena?
00:24:50A little old lady.
00:24:51Hello?
00:25:14Hello?
00:25:15Mr. Whittman?
00:25:16There's a police officer on the phone.
00:25:18He says he needs to speak to a manager right away.
00:25:21Oh, thanks, Sam.
00:25:24Hello, officer.
00:25:25This is Norm Wittsman, AP G&E District Manager.
00:25:27What can I do for you?
00:25:30Well, yes.
00:25:30Yes, we are missing a van.
00:25:42Ken, what happened to you?
00:25:46Now, I'm really going to need to make sure you girls come back soon
00:25:58and you tell all of your sorority sisters.
00:26:00Oh, we will.
00:26:06Uh, excuse me?
00:26:07I'm looking for Agnes.
00:26:10That's me.
00:26:10How can I help you?
00:26:12I was wondering if you've seen my boyfriend, Ashton.
00:26:16Is he missing?
00:26:18Yeah, he came by here to get some stuff and never came back.
00:26:21Oh, no, no.
00:26:23I would definitely remember such a tasty, pretty young man.
00:26:27But Manny told me he gave Ashton your address.
00:26:30Oh, well, I'm sure he's going to turn it up.
00:26:34I've looked everywhere.
00:26:35I guess I'll have to go to the police now.
00:26:38Uh, hey.
00:26:41You know, I'm sure he's going to show up.
00:26:42Why don't you just come on in and why don't you just talk about it?
00:26:48So kind of you.
00:26:49That's the least I can do.
00:27:02Just make yourself at home.
00:27:07What's your name, dearie?
00:27:10Reynolds.
00:27:10Reynolds!
00:27:11That's German.
00:27:18That's where I'm from.
00:27:27Oh, here we go.
00:27:29Here we go.
00:27:30Here we go.
00:27:30Here we go.
00:27:31Just a little bit of tea.
00:27:33It'll make everything feel a lot better.
00:27:35You know, I just don't understand him.
00:27:44When will you call me back?
00:27:45Boys will be boys.
00:27:47Come on, you need to really have your tea before it gets cold.
00:27:55Do you have any sugar?
00:27:56Surely.
00:27:57One or two.
00:27:58Two, please.
00:28:05Oh, for God.
00:28:10What?
00:28:11Eh, just a loud knock.
00:28:15I'm going to be right back.
00:28:16It's probably just my brother, Hansel.
00:28:21Reynolds, just keep a little bit of an eye on her.
00:28:24You must be Hansel.
00:28:36Hey, what took you so long?
00:28:38Did you go all the way through the Colorado to find a spot?
00:28:40Well, you could have just put it to my driveway.
00:28:43Your driveway, yeah.
00:28:44Okay.
00:28:45Would have been easier.
00:28:47So, has she seen Ashton?
00:28:49No.
00:28:51That has definitely got to be cold by now.
00:28:53Let me just put on a fresh new pot.
00:28:56It'll only take me a minute.
00:28:58Okay.
00:28:58We should really be going.
00:29:01It will just take me a minute.
00:29:02I'm sorry.
00:29:03I need to find my boyfriend and not sit around here and drink your tea.
00:29:06Reynolds.
00:29:06Look, I'm really just trying to help.
00:29:16She's just under a lot of stress from looking for her boyfriend.
00:29:18I think I just need to take her home.
00:29:21But thank you for your time.
00:29:22We're sorry to have trouble, too.
00:29:23There's no trouble.
00:29:25I love having young people around.
00:29:37You know, it'd be nice if you could be a little more supportive.
00:29:39Good boyfriends.
00:29:50Good boyfriends.
00:30:02You are socı.
00:30:06I dare to.
00:30:08You dare to.
00:30:10You dare to.
00:30:14So let me get this straight your boyfriend went out to get something which you won't say what it
00:30:30is and then he didn't return how long ago was that about 24 hours ago right Hansel yeah
00:30:37I mean if it take an hour what were you two fighting about we weren't fighting he went
00:30:43out to get some stuff and never came back with that stuff happen to be makes you say
00:30:51that because one Ashton Crawford has racked himself up quite a few frequent flyer
00:30:57points in our misdemeanor program so he's still missing on heart this is a waste
00:31:06of time out looking for some burned out what about the old lady guys I mean my
00:31:13come on aren't you at least gonna go you know talk to this woman I mean isn't it a felony to be
00:31:18growing well depends on the amount and if there's an intent to sell well I mean she's selling
00:31:27really did you buy some no you did you see her so anyone did you see any plants
00:31:47okay so you want us to bust a senior citizen for possession of a with intent to sell but yet you
00:31:56don't have any evidence but Manny said that she was sorry what sorry excuse me Manny is that like the
00:32:05local dealer no because if you want to name names or drop locations and we might have something to
00:32:11talk about I don't have anything to say it's kind of what I thought let's go heart
00:32:20hold on give us the old woman's address okay and if we get time we'll stop by we'll ask a few
00:32:35questions all right heart you got to be kidding me now let us know if he turns up okay you know and
00:32:46if there's anything else you find citizens need please don't hesitate to call because after all we
00:32:52are here to serve and protect good night see they didn't care just like I said what do you want to do now
00:33:22yo yin and yang what the y'all smoking this amazing for Manny it's new it's called black forest
00:33:39we came to the decision earlier today that we were not going to be sharing and yeah you will be sharing
00:33:50yeah man have a talk lovey every everyone does give me all that what empty your pockets of all
00:34:03that black forest maybe my boys won't you up too bad huh who the man
00:34:20my bed
00:34:25my bed
00:34:25my bed
00:34:25my bed
00:34:25my bed
00:34:25my bed
00:34:27my bed
00:34:29my bed
00:34:39my bed
00:34:40it tickles i mean i can tell
00:34:41get lost baby
00:34:50now
00:34:52carlos
00:34:58what's up man
00:35:00what brings you out to the valley it's time to get paid fool
00:35:04yeah um you know what you know what you know what you know what you know what i do know
00:35:20that you're moving that black forest so why don't you hand it over
00:35:24come on man i actually sold out of all her
00:35:30man oh
00:35:34you said who
00:35:36cuz if you're selling her my turf
00:35:39that makes it my
00:35:42yes
00:35:44get this
00:35:45That's Agnes' money, man. I got to give her something. Oh, you got to give her something.
00:36:02What'd you give her that? You tell that put that she wants to put your on my turf. She's going to have to pay like everybody else.
00:36:10This ain't nothing but a down payment, bro. So when she tells you or gives you some lip, you look her dead in the face and you tell her, Carlos said he's going to come to your casa with la raza and you up personally.
00:36:29Man, but she's just this little sweet grandma, man. Oh, a little grandma, a little abuelita, a little tiny thing like that. That's perfect, bro. The way I like them. She can spit her tanchos out.
00:36:38Yeah, man, I got it, man. No, you don't got it. You're going to tell her exactly what I said word for word. You got that? Yeah. Yeah, man. I got it, man. Don't worry about it. It's cool.
00:36:57So everything you told me.
00:37:02What the f*** are you still doing here? Aren't you a messenger boy now? Yeah, yeah, I am.
00:37:13That's what he said.
00:37:20I hope he's got a really big d***.
00:37:23You just don't get it, do you? Carlos will hurt you. I've seen him and his homies tear a guy apart from being short on his cash. Like, tear his d*** apart. Blood and d*** was everywhere.
00:37:35How many homies?
00:37:36How many homies?
00:37:37When he means big business, he could show up with like four or five d*** articles.
00:37:44Then I think I'm going to need you to help me.
00:37:47No. No, no, you can't ask me to do that. See, see, Carlos got a long memory. He'll hunt me down and he'll eat me for breakfast. You know what I'm saying?
00:37:56Sounds like my kind of man.
00:37:58Here, please, have some cookies.
00:38:03Cookies?
00:38:06Can I use your phone? I just want to do a little text.
00:38:11Okay.
00:38:14Do you spell f*** with one g or two?
00:38:19Oh, f***. Okay, I think we're just going to go with two g's. Now, why don't you just eat your little cookies?
00:38:24No, no, no, no, no. No, no. Oh, f***. Oh, f***. Oh, f***. Oh, f***. I'm dead. I'm dead. No, we're dead. We're dead.
00:38:38No, you were right the first time.
00:38:40No, you were right the first time.
00:38:42Yes, that's fine.
00:38:44I knew you were right the first time.
00:38:48You got done?
00:38:50Yeah.
00:38:52Did you get him posted at the school?
00:38:54Yeah.
00:38:56Okay, what about the park?
00:38:58No, no, no.
00:39:00I'm just kidding.
00:39:02I'm just kidding.
00:39:04I'm just kidding.
00:39:06I'm just kidding.
00:39:08You posted at the school?
00:39:09Yeah.
00:39:10Okay, what about the park?
00:39:11Yeah.
00:39:12In the mall?
00:39:13Gretel.
00:39:14Look, I've posted them everywhere we've talked about, alright?
00:39:15There's nothing we can do at this point.
00:39:17I mean, we just have to wait, okay?
00:39:21Take me by that old witch's place.
00:39:26I want to talk to her.
00:39:27No.
00:39:28No, that's not a good idea.
00:39:30Why not?
00:39:31Because she can have you arrested for harassment.
00:39:33I'm not harassing her, I'm investigating her.
00:39:37Oh, okay.
00:39:38Yeah, and I guess the Nazis were just instituting a simple relocation plan.
00:39:43Screw you, Hansel.
00:39:44Eh, me and my sister.
00:39:46It's kind of gross.
00:40:05Damn.
00:40:07Black Forest, but it's...
00:40:08It's powerful, man.
00:40:09It's my phone.
00:40:10What?
00:40:11No, no, no.
00:40:12It's my phone.
00:40:13What?
00:40:14No, no, no.
00:40:15It's my phone.
00:40:24What?
00:40:25No, no, no.
00:40:26No, no.
00:40:27Big fool.
00:40:28Big fool.
00:40:29Big fool.
00:40:30What?
00:40:31Oh, God.
00:40:32What?
00:40:33That's difficult to do.
00:40:34Huh?
00:40:35Hey, baby!
00:40:37Hey!
00:40:39What?
00:40:40You want to get out, man?
00:40:41Oi!
00:40:42open up
00:40:51just gonna try to take Carlos
00:40:53excuse me
00:40:55I was looking for some old lady
00:40:58you got some old lady living in here
00:41:00no no old ladies here
00:41:02I'm gonna kill that pendejo man
00:41:04alright mamacita let me ask you something
00:41:07you ever heard of something called the
00:41:08black forest
00:41:10doesn't ring a bell
00:41:12check out the coffee table
00:41:17you know maybe it's just me
00:41:22but I don't like it
00:41:24when no pretty
00:41:25tries to play me for a fool
00:41:29what is this
00:41:35don't look like no girl house I ever seen
00:41:38what's a girl house
00:41:39what's a girl house
00:41:43where
00:41:44is your crop
00:41:46it's in the basement
00:41:48but you don't wanna go there
00:41:51oh I wanna go there
00:41:54but see right now
00:41:55you're not gonna tell me
00:41:57what I wanna do
00:41:58so why don't you
00:41:59take me down
00:42:01to the basement
00:42:02there you go
00:42:17mama
00:42:19you open the door
00:42:21we're getting the whole 50 cent
00:42:23as you wish
00:42:27this used to be a funeral home
00:42:44that's a fair of all the bodies
00:42:47yes
00:43:05The last tenants made this room into a wine center, but I don't know how to drink wine.
00:43:25And this is where I let my little darling spread their roots.
00:43:33What kind of place is this?
00:43:35This old bomb shelter that I just recycled for my needs.
00:43:39Damn, Mommy, how do you get these plants that are so big?
00:43:44Magic.
00:43:46And of course, just a little bit of my own special plan.
00:43:50Of...
00:43:53Fertilizer.
00:43:56To get it going.
00:44:01Speaking of which...
00:44:02I know just what it needs to make it the best crop ever.
00:44:15Check it out, Holmes.
00:44:17Get the jackpot.
00:44:18Are you going to harvest them?
00:44:22They're not ready yet.
00:44:24They might be big, but they're not mature.
00:44:27Huh.
00:44:28Well, guess what?
00:44:30I tell you when to harvest.
00:44:34I don't think so.
00:44:38Wrong.
00:44:38You know, there's a little rumor going around.
00:45:06Manny said that you told him he wanted me to take my dentures out and do something nasty to you.
00:45:15Now, could that be true?
00:45:17You crazy...
00:45:17It's just not on the menu tonight.
00:45:22Hmm.
00:45:22What a bummer.
00:45:48There's got to be something.
00:45:49Something.
00:45:49Something.
00:45:49Something.
00:45:49Something.
00:45:50Something.
00:45:51Something.
00:45:51Something.
00:45:58Manny.
00:45:59What the f***?
00:45:59Oh
00:46:29Let's go.
00:46:59All magic comes into rice.
00:47:29All magic comes into rice.
00:47:59All magic comes into rice.
00:48:29All magic comes into rice.
00:48:36It's gonna be okay.
00:48:39All magic comes into rice.
00:48:46Franz, Franz, Franz, Franz, Franz.
00:48:53Franz?
00:48:54Franz?
00:48:55Franz?
00:48:56You're gonna be a very, very good boy.
00:49:01You can be a very good boy.
00:49:06Now, who wants a treat?
00:49:09France?
00:49:10Would you like a little treat?
00:49:12My baby dog.
00:49:20A good dog.
00:49:22Those fingers?
00:49:24Waste not, want not, right?
00:49:26You're gonna kill me, aren't you?
00:49:29Well, since you're here hanging out,
00:49:32I might as well enjoy and get a little stoned.
00:49:52Oh, that's so...
00:49:54Help! Help! Somebody help me!
00:50:02No one can hear you.
00:50:04Help!
00:50:06No one can hear you.
00:50:10I'll be back in a little bit.
00:50:12I just gotta go clean up a zombie.
00:50:14And I'll come check in on you later.
00:50:32Good morning, Norm.
00:50:34Well, hey, Sam.
00:50:35Uh...
00:50:36I don't know if this is important or not, but...
00:50:39My son came home stoned last night.
00:50:42Well, after we finished discussing it...
00:50:45He told me about this new strain of...
00:50:49That some old lady's selling.
00:50:50Did he say where?
00:50:52Same area as my power surge.
00:51:04Look in her eyes, hypnotized.
00:51:15Look in her eyes, hypnotized.
00:51:21No, you can't run fast enough.
00:51:24No, you're never gonna run fast enough.
00:51:27Leave your thoughts behind your life.
00:51:31Leave your thoughts behind your life.
00:51:36Leave your thoughts behind your life.
00:51:47Nanny's missing?
00:51:49Yeah, no one's seen him since.
00:51:51Haven't you seen that little guara who was all up in his grill the other day?
00:51:54Same one.
00:51:55Maybe you two should have taken me seriously.
00:51:58Yeah, you're right.
00:52:00I was thinking of going to the police to follow-
00:52:01Don't bother.
00:52:02As soon as I see Manny has a record, they'll blow it off.
00:52:05Serve and protect my ass.
00:52:07What do we do?
00:52:09I know where they are.
00:52:11But it's gonna be dangerous.
00:52:13Definitely illegal.
00:52:15Somebody's gonna get hurt.
00:52:16My car's right here.
00:52:47That's the house.
00:52:49Why can't we just go in there all guns blazing?
00:52:52We need to case the place first.
00:52:53Find out if she home, you know?
00:52:55That kind of s**t.
00:52:56Smart.
00:52:59You have done this before, right?
00:53:02Well, don't tell me we're popping your beanie cherry.
00:53:06Beanie?
00:53:07Damn girl, breaking and entering?
00:53:08Yeah, well I guess we are.
00:53:10Okay, well since you're the expert, what should we do first?
00:53:12We need to find out if she home.
00:53:15I mean, it looks empty to me.
00:53:17Yeah, but she's an old lady.
00:53:18You can never tell if those s**t are home just by looking at the house.
00:53:22Okay, listen me, huh?
00:53:25I'm gonna go knock on the front door pretend like I wanna buy some s**t.
00:53:28While you do the beanie action in the back.
00:53:30Okay, and if she's not there?
00:53:31Then I'll join you in the back and we'll break in the cabin.
00:53:33Alright, cool.
00:53:34Oh, uh, I must have the wrong address.
00:53:51Were you looking for someone older?
00:53:52Yeah, does she live here?
00:53:55Did someone, um, did someone tell you to ask for a little, sweet little lady?
00:54:01Yeah, he said.
00:54:02Oh.
00:54:13Honestly.
00:54:15Once you're a day over 40, they think you've got one foot already in the grave.
00:54:19You know, I used to think that way too until I dated my last boyfriend and he was like 42 and I was like, dude, you're way too old for me.
00:54:27But then he like bought me all these fly clothes and took me to really fancy places like the Cheesecake Factory.
00:54:49And then I realized I could totally be into older guys as long as they could still get it up. You know what I mean?
00:55:02Because if you ain't getting d***, you ain't getting nothing. You know what I mean?
00:55:03Would you like to come in for some tea? And by tea, I mean...
00:55:04Would you like to come in for some d***? Hell yeah. Come on in.
00:55:10Would you like to come in for some d***?
00:55:11Would you like to come in for some d***? And by tea, I mean...
00:55:13Would you like to come in for some d***?
00:55:14Hell yeah. Come on in.
00:55:15Come on in.
00:55:16Come on in.
00:55:17Come on in.
00:55:22Um, my cousin Rosa, the one who tests her not the one in jail, she makes her own special hot oil blend.
00:55:25I mean...
00:55:26I mean...
00:55:27Would you like to come in for some d***?
00:55:28Hell yeah. Come on in.
00:55:29Come on in.
00:55:32Um, my cousin Rosa, the one who tests her not the one in jail, she makes her own special hot oil blend.
00:55:51And sells it online.
00:55:53I could totally hook you up if you'd like.
00:55:55I like.
00:55:57I like very much.
00:56:21I like very much.
00:56:22I like very much.
00:56:23I like very much.
00:56:24I like very much.
00:56:25I like very much.
00:56:26I like very much.
00:56:27I like very much.
00:56:28I like very much.
00:56:29I like very much.
00:56:30I like very much.
00:56:31I like very much.
00:56:32I like very much.
00:56:33I like very much.
00:56:34I like very much.
00:56:35I like very much.
00:56:36I like very much.
00:56:37I like very much.
00:56:38I like very much.
00:56:39I like very much.
00:56:40I like very much.
00:56:41I like very much.
00:56:42I like very much.
00:56:43I like very much.
00:56:44is it hot in here or is it just
00:57:02that's a very pretty rosier where'd you get it
00:57:11oh you're gonna love this story
00:57:13you're gonna love this story
00:57:43okay Gretel you can do this
00:57:52what is this place
00:58:07what out there
00:58:09is that you Ash
00:58:11Ash
00:58:12no I'm Octavio
00:58:14Octavio is Ash with you
00:58:16no it's just me
00:58:18and I came here with two other guys
00:58:20where are they
00:58:21I don't know
00:58:22probably dead
00:58:24gonna kill us all
00:58:26you're dead I'll
00:58:29pull your together so I can help you
00:58:31where are you
00:58:33she got me locked up in a damn cave
00:58:37where which path did you take
00:58:38I don't remember
00:58:40it all looks the same
00:58:42you're not very helpful are you
00:58:44maybe if I whistle
00:58:46you can follow the sound
00:58:48I don't know
00:58:49I don't know
00:58:50I don't know
00:58:51I don't know
00:58:52I don't know
00:58:53I don't know
00:58:54I don't know
00:58:55I don't know
00:58:56I don't know
00:58:57I don't know
00:58:58I don't know
00:58:59I don't know
00:59:00I don't know
00:59:01I don't know
00:59:02I don't know
00:59:03I don't know
00:59:04I don't know
00:59:05I don't know
00:59:06I don't know
00:59:07And then she opens the door for me and tells me to come back real soon.
00:59:37Little did that, I had this one and two others just like it up in my bag.
00:59:43Holla!
00:59:48You smell delicious.
00:59:52Vanilla.
00:59:54Yeah, good nose.
01:00:07Octavio?
01:00:17Yeah?
01:00:18I need you to keep whistling or something so I can find you.
01:00:22I'm sorry, my mouth is dry.
01:00:31Did I tell you I can read bombs?
01:00:33Really?
01:00:34Yeah, my grandmother taught me.
01:00:36This here's your lifeline.
01:00:37And it says you're gonna live a long, long, long...
01:00:43Jesus.
01:00:44What?
01:00:45I've never seen a lifeline like this before.
01:00:48Enough about my life, let's talk about your life.
01:01:00Where's the key?
01:01:01You don't have them?
01:01:02You didn't say anything about keys.
01:01:04Just keeps them on the hook at the bottom of the stairs.
01:01:06The ones here.
01:01:07The ones that lead up to the main room.
01:01:10I'll be right back.
01:01:12Promise?
01:01:16I promise.
01:01:22Is this your lifeline?
01:01:25Uh-huh.
01:01:26Agnes, what are you doing?
01:01:34Tasting the merchandise.
01:01:37Well, I only...
01:01:39Ever kissed, just so you know.
01:01:42I find that hard to believe.
01:01:45I mean, with...
01:01:47With other chicks, silly.
01:01:50Me too, silly.
01:01:57Okay.
01:02:11Now, what are there?
01:02:13You fell over, wanted...
01:02:21What happened?
01:02:22Oh
01:02:24Heliophracus.
01:02:32Yeah!
01:02:34Oh, hell no!
01:02:48Gretel!
01:02:49What the?
01:02:50I thought somebody was killing you!
01:02:52I just killed that!
01:02:53Don't come any closer!
01:02:54Don't tell me what to do, but you killed someone!
01:02:56Don't let me go!
01:02:57Don't do this!
01:03:00Oh my god!
01:03:01What did I do?
01:03:02What am I doing?
01:03:03Oh!
01:03:04I did what I had to do.
01:03:11Cut!
01:03:13Cut!
01:03:15Carlos!
01:03:16Break out of me!
01:03:21Gretel?
01:03:22You home?
01:03:24Please don't be home.
01:03:26Oh, thank you.
01:03:28Very thoughtful look.
01:03:29Oh!
01:03:30Oh, no!
01:03:41Oh!
01:03:42Oh no!
01:03:59Oh all of you.
01:04:02Oh, no!
01:04:07Oh!
01:04:08Let's get on.
01:04:26It takes the rainbow.
01:04:27Everything's going to be okay.
01:04:39Skat, I'll tell you, everything's going to be okay.
01:04:46No.
01:04:48No.
01:04:57Kretel?
01:05:07Kretel!
01:05:27Kretel, I'll tell you, everything's going to be okay.
01:05:57How do you know?
01:05:58Ritter.
01:05:59What?
01:06:00Remember that girl from the other day?
01:06:02From what girl?
01:06:04The one with a missing boyfriend.
01:06:06Oh yeah, the cute little redhead.
01:06:10Guess who just showed up on the missing person report?
01:06:14Her boyfriend.
01:06:15The one and only.
01:06:17I think we should go check out her story.
01:06:22That's a good idea.
01:06:25Uh, where are you going?
01:06:30Priorities, heart.
01:06:33Priorities.
01:06:34One, one, David.
01:06:35One, one, David.
01:06:36One, zero, nine, nine, nine, six.
01:06:38Checking NCIC.
01:06:39Seven, 85, direct NCIC.
01:06:41Get me one!
01:06:42One, two, three, three, four, two, three, five, eight, nine, six.
01:06:49How did we get in here?
01:07:06Carlos and I mean.
01:07:08I don't know what happened to you.
01:07:10Hey, it's safe.
01:07:11You helped me.
01:07:12You trapped me.
01:07:13This place is haunted.
01:07:16Not haunted.
01:07:19You're like enchanted.
01:07:22She's got to be some kind of witch.
01:07:25Here, I thought you were just these f***y little b***hs.
01:07:29Where's Ashton?
01:07:31He's kind of trying to help me turn back those nasty girl hands of time.
01:07:38What the hell is she talking about?
01:07:39No, she's always doing this crazy-ass talk.
01:07:42That doesn't answer my question.
01:07:46Well, it should.
01:07:47What have you done with my Ashton?
01:08:03You suck the wife out of him?
01:08:05His youth.
01:08:07They just gave me all my youth back.
01:08:10Is he dead?
01:08:20Duh.
01:08:26Got a girl.
01:08:28Company.
01:08:30And take care of this.
01:08:32Make sure they all feel nice and warm and fuzzy.
01:08:35Hey, Carlos.
01:08:38Giddy up.
01:08:52Hands out.
01:08:53What a great surprise.
01:08:57I was under the impression he didn't partake.
01:09:01I'm sorry.
01:09:02Have we met?
01:09:04My mother.
01:09:05My mother has just said the most wonderful, wonderful things about you and your lovely sister.
01:09:12Oh, okay.
01:09:13Is she home?
01:09:14I need to apologize.
01:09:16Apologize?
01:09:17Yeah, for Gretel.
01:09:18For harassing her.
01:09:21My mother knew that she was just very concerned about her boyfriend.
01:09:25Her boyfriend's name is...
01:09:26Ashton.
01:09:27Ashton, yes, that's right.
01:09:28It's no big deal.
01:09:30Really, though?
01:09:30Because, I mean, I thought that she'd be kind of pissed off after Gretel, like, stopped by again.
01:09:36She did stop by again, didn't she?
01:09:42No, I haven't seen her since the other day.
01:09:45Oh, okay.
01:09:46I thought...
01:09:47You thought what?
01:09:51Well, something Gretel said indicated to me that she was going to be stopping by again.
01:09:58It's obviously mistaken.
01:10:02Come on, I would love to make you some tea.
01:10:05I'm going to make you some tea.
01:10:06I'm going to make you some tea.
01:10:36You're just so, like...
01:10:39Awesomely beautiful.
01:10:42I just wanted to capture the moment, I guess.
01:10:46Awesomely beautiful?
01:10:47Yeah, I mean, you have, like, perfect cheekbones, perfect chin, you know, perfect...
01:10:54How sweet of you.
01:11:04Can I see?
01:11:05There's got to be something wrong with the camera or something.
01:11:08I don't think there's anything wrong with the camera.
01:11:10No, honestly, honestly, honestly, I...
01:11:12Give it to me.
01:11:14It just doesn't do you justice, and I, uh...
01:11:17Give it to me.
01:11:19I know the camera never lies, does it?
01:11:30I know the camera never lies, does it?
01:11:33Carter!
01:11:34Bring him in me!
01:11:36Come on, you zombie!
01:11:50You never send a zombie to do a woman's job.
01:12:04Oh, crap, you became me.
01:12:06Evening, ma'am.
01:12:14Uh...
01:12:15Oh, good God, I'm not having a good night.
01:12:26How are we going to get past that damn dog?
01:12:28You stop moving so much, I can't think.
01:12:30Well, a moment helps me think.
01:12:36I can't think of anything.
01:12:39Miss Hudson told me I was a Greek tragedy.
01:12:41Damn, if that b**** right...
01:12:43God, Greek tragedy, that's it, Bianca!
01:12:46What's it?
01:12:47What if this hellhound thing is like the Cerberus in the story of Orpheus?
01:12:50Say what?
01:12:51You know, the Cerberus, the three-headed dog that guarded the gates of hell.
01:12:53Orpheus sang to it and put it to sleep.
01:12:55Okay, I got this.
01:12:57I sing all the time.
01:13:00Blast, blast, blast.
01:13:07I tried to dash so I kept them in the a** in my gap for a...
01:13:10Stop, stop, stop, stop, stop, stop, stop!
01:13:11What?
01:13:12That's not music.
01:13:13Yeah, it is.
01:13:14You just don't know talent.
01:13:15You can't sing.
01:13:17Okay.
01:13:18Since you think you know all about music and Cerberus and s**t,
01:13:21then go ahead, Juarez, you sing.
01:13:23Rose, rose, rose, red.
01:13:33Will I ever see thee when I shall marry at my room?
01:13:41Sue said...
01:13:42Rose, rose, rose, rose, red.
01:13:47Will I ever see thee when I shall marry at my will?
01:13:55said rose?
01:13:57Rose.
01:13:57Rose.
01:13:58Rose.
01:13:58Rose.
01:13:59Rose.
01:13:59Rose.
01:13:59Oh, you're awake, my little pretty.
01:14:17Oh, you're awake, my little pretty.
01:14:22What are you doing?
01:14:24Fixing dinner.
01:14:27Unless you're a virgin.
01:14:30What?
01:14:31Of course I'm not a virgin.
01:14:39You're a virgin.
01:14:41Just gonna call for a little bit of extra magic.
01:14:45Crazy.
01:14:47What are you doing?
01:14:52I lost a trail of Skittles, so I can't find my way back.
01:14:55Oh.
01:14:58What?
01:14:59Okay, well, I kind of had the munchies, and I kind of...
01:15:01You ate my trail.
01:15:03It's not like you said, hey, bitch, don't eat the Skittles, I'm laying down the trail.
01:15:06How the hell?
01:15:07Why would you eat Skittles that were laying on the ground?
01:15:09Excuse me, maybe I was running from zombies, freaking out, and I needed some comfort food.
01:15:15It's this way.
01:15:16Are you sure?
01:15:18No, but I'm tired of you freaking out Skittles.
01:15:20Come on.
01:15:21We are so screwed.
01:15:22Oh God!
01:15:31Oh God!
01:15:32Oh God!
01:15:33Help!
01:15:34Help!
01:15:34Help!
01:15:37Come on!
01:15:37I can't get the strap undone!
01:15:55Hurry up!
01:15:56Hurry!
01:15:57What the f**k?!
01:16:11What the f**k?!
01:16:17You killed my pretty little boy, my pretty pretty little boy, we have a little bit of unfinished
01:16:29business.
01:16:30The Heliothorakis, the Heliothorakis, the Heliothorakis, the Heliothorakis, the Heliothorakis.
01:16:37No!
01:16:38No!
01:16:39No!
01:16:40No!
01:16:41No!
01:16:42No!
01:16:43No!
01:16:44No!
01:16:45No!
01:16:46No!
01:16:47No!
01:16:49No!
01:16:50No!
01:16:50No!
01:16:51No!
01:16:53No!
01:16:53No!
01:17:11Are your kids going to be okay?
01:17:16I think so.
01:17:19Do you think she's dead?
01:17:21Oh, yeah.
01:17:23Good night, kids.
01:17:35I should have trusted you.
01:17:40And I should have.
01:17:42We do.
01:17:52What have we here?
01:17:54Oh, aren't you a pretty one?
01:17:58And look at that collar.
01:17:59Somebody loves you.
01:18:01Do you have any idea?
01:18:03No, you don't.
01:18:04Well, how would you like to come home with Uncle Norm?
01:18:09And just until we find your family,
01:18:11you are just so pretty.
01:18:14Yes, you are.
01:18:16We're going to go to my nice home.
01:18:18And look at that.
01:18:20Oh, my gosh.
01:18:22Oh, my gosh.
01:18:23Oh, my God.
01:18:25Oh.
01:18:27Oh.
01:18:27Oh.
01:18:28Oh.
01:18:30Oh.
01:18:30Oh.
01:18:31Oh.
01:18:31Oh.
01:18:32Oh.
01:18:32Oh, yeah.
01:18:44Oh.
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