00:00I am Jahan. I am Dave. And we are married!
00:08We've been married for five years.
00:14Ten years ago, at an alpha party, and I had just crossed, I just turned 21.
00:22I was just fresh, young, and out here living my best life.
00:25I was not thinking about nobody. I was out here trying to do whatever it was I wanted to do.
00:32I was a, I guess I was a graduate.
00:35I was back in St. Louis, where I went to school at, where my wife went to school at as well, for my chapter's probate.
00:43And my profile is like, I have somebody I want to introduce you to.
00:47And I'm like, that's the dude who was emceeing the probate?
00:52And she's like, yeah. So we have a conversation.
00:55And I'm like, you graduated from college the same year that I graduated from high school.
01:01I'm like, you too old for me. You need to go somewhere. That's gross. Ugh.
01:05I thought she was beautiful instantly. Right then and there, I was like, okay, word.
01:09But, I think we both kind of figured out pretty quickly that, you know, in that space,
01:16neither of us were really ready to, you know, to pursue anything across, across time zones.
01:25I mean, technically the first date was a fly out. Um, yeah.
01:30Technically the first date, it was overall, was like a fly out weekend.
01:34So I came to New York, but I, my best friend was living here.
01:37So I was like, okay, I'm going to stay with my best friend though.
01:40And I'll meet you somewhere else.
01:43And so I ended up spending like the weekend with him.
01:51Honestly, so here's the thing. I had the, you're the one moment on the phone.
01:56I think what particularly made that click for me was, um, just the, a feeling of, you know, I'm being myself.
02:06So we always say we were friends who decided to get married.
02:10He was persistent and he was consistent.
02:12And I never felt like I had to hide any parts of myself or that I had to like dig for parts of him.
02:23The idea that we're evolving, we're aware of that.
02:26But one of the things that I think I probably started out marriage trying to do was to kind of figure out,
02:35okay, I have this challenge of learning my partner.
02:37You think you kind of figure out how to do that over time.
02:40And as that person grows, that process changes.
02:45Our marriage has changed.
02:46Like when you introduce children, how do we navigate like our children and their growth and the things that they are experiencing?
02:53Because they are changing even more rapid than we are.
02:56Yeah.
02:57Um, but we're still changing.
03:03The shared experiences, I guess, uh, that we all endure and that we all understand, um, blackness to encompass and having somebody to ride that wave with you.
03:15Black love is a safe space.
03:17When we exit our home and when we exit our families, the communities and the world that we have to exist and navigate do not create safety for black folks.
03:30And our marriage is a safe haven.
03:34It's the one place where I know that I will be fully accepted for my full unapologetic self.
03:41They taught me it up with all or whatever their labor of the world.
03:43They taught me it up with all of their brand new coworkers.
03:45They taught me it up with property, wherever they have their clients, up with property.
03:46They taught me it up with them.
03:47They taught me it up with the public.
03:48They taught me it up with this.
03:49I will be banking research.
03:50They taught me in the public.
03:51They taught me the city.
03:52And all of my었어요 criticizing personally.
03:53The slam muscles in the background is the way they eat.
03:54The payment was pretty much�.
03:55Theignant singer is off typical headlong請's love.
03:56This was a posteristic seven.
03:57The moment in it of September 26th, eight years of specialization,
03:58and the деле for state, it was trendy.
04:00abundance.
04:01So I hate to have a relationship with all of your Circle you know.
Comments