00:00Uh, you have recently been widowed, and, uh, you're dealing now with the, uh, does this emotional impact of, of this kind of pain alter in any way your own feeling, philosophy?
00:14No, it only altered my position in regard to the world, which is that I lost my top value, I'm not too interested in anything else, but I'll survive it, because I do love the world in general, and I do love ideas, and I do love men, but my personal is a loss now.
00:35Now, isn't there a temptation for you, and I, I, I don't mean this to flip, to suggest that you're not sincere in your writing, to hope for a reunion with the person you love, to look beyond the...
00:47I've asked myself just that, seriously, and I thought if I really believed it for five minutes, I'd commit suicide immediately, and I know that cannot be right.
00:57How would you get to him right away?
00:58To get to him, of course. I'll tell you more, I'll ask myself, how would I feel if I think he is now on trial before God or St. Peter, and I'm not with him.
01:09The testifier to help him out.
01:10Exactly. My first desire in that case would be to run to help him, and tell how good he was, but...
01:18But with some of your statements, maybe your husband just as soon not even know, let God know that, you know what I mean?
01:23He was more of an atheist than I am, if there could be the grease.
01:29My comment is offered with love. I hope you know that there's nothing flip about it, because I know your pain is real, and we share it with you, and hope that you'll walk out of this wood soon.
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