- 11 hours ago
Category
🎥
Short filmTranscript
00:00:00Mr. Xander, former Green Marais.
00:00:30Medal of Honor recipient, CIA operative, former head of the Black Cora Mercenary Society.
00:00:45I thought you would have been a bigger challenge, but what a disappointment you are.
00:00:52You're beginning to sound like my father.
00:00:54Is there anything you would like to tell us now?
00:01:01Yeah.
00:01:03I want to thank you.
00:01:05You just saved me 1,500 bucks in a root canal.
00:01:15Joke.
00:01:16Don't misunderstand me.
00:01:21I find you very funny.
00:01:23But I'm done with you and your jokes.
00:01:28So, tell me, Mr. Xander, do you have any final words before I remove your head from your body?
00:01:39Yeah.
00:01:42I do.
00:01:47Nice leg.
00:01:58Sayonara, amigos.
00:02:00Cut!
00:02:01Cut!
00:02:02Cut!
00:02:03Garrett, where are you?
00:02:04Where are you?
00:02:05Is this how you take care of me?
00:02:06I'm supposed to be taken care of.
00:02:07What happened?
00:02:08Sorry, it just malfunctioned.
00:02:09My bad, babe.
00:02:10Mal functioned?
00:02:11Wait, this is smoke.
00:02:12How could smoke malfunction?
00:02:13No, we don't use smoke anymore.
00:02:14No, no, no.
00:02:15Red Rocket was smoke.
00:02:16That was...
00:02:17This is different.
00:02:18This is liquid nitrogen.
00:02:19New formula.
00:02:20And it's safe until it explodes.
00:02:21Nitrogen?
00:02:22Are you kidding me?
00:02:23This is a chemical.
00:02:24This can't be good for my body.
00:02:25Oh, baby, you look fabulous.
00:02:26Yeah, man.
00:02:27Honey, you look fabulous.
00:02:28You really do look fabulous.
00:02:29Let's see.
00:02:30You look fabulous.
00:02:31Let's see.
00:02:32You look fabulous.
00:02:33You look fabulous.
00:02:34You look fabulous.
00:02:35Let's get the green screen lit.
00:02:36Let's get Colton in his new wardrobe.
00:02:37Wait a minute, wait a minute.
00:02:38Darren, I'm not doing 87.
00:02:39I'm wrapped.
00:02:40I can't do this.
00:02:41We have to do scene 87.
00:02:42I need you in the scene with the bugs.
00:02:43What bugs?
00:02:44I hate bugs.
00:02:45I can't do a bug movie.
00:02:46That's so funny that you say that,
00:02:47because you're in a bug movie right now.
00:02:48That's what's happening.
00:02:49When did this become a bug movie?
00:02:50It became a bug movie when the writer
00:02:51put his fingers on the keyboard.
00:02:52Excuse me.
00:02:53I hope she's a good friend of yours,
00:02:54because you just got her fired.
00:02:55Hit that with something heavy.
00:02:56If I see that New Year family,
00:02:57I don't know.
00:02:58I don't know.
00:02:59Your face is in the unemployment office.
00:03:00What page is there a bug movie?
00:03:01What page?
00:03:02Did you read the script?
00:03:03Yeah, I looked it over.
00:03:04What do you mean, you looked it over?
00:03:05Did you put it on a coffee table
00:03:06and look at it, or did you read it?
00:03:07I read most of it, Darren.
00:03:08Come on, we're done here.
00:03:09We're not done.
00:03:10We're not done.
00:03:11No, really?
00:03:12Look, we're into four hours of overtime,
00:03:13and you promised me I could take my kid
00:03:14to see his favorite team.
00:03:15You promised me that you would be a team player
00:03:17on this show.
00:03:18I'm not done.
00:03:19I'm not done.
00:03:20I'm not done.
00:03:21I'm not done.
00:03:22I'm not done.
00:03:23I'm done.
00:03:24I'm done.
00:03:25I'm done.
00:03:26You promised me that you would be a team player
00:03:28on this shoot, that I wouldn't have to put up
00:03:30with your crap this time.
00:03:31I've been here for 16 hours choking on smoke.
00:03:33How much more of a team player do you want?
00:03:35Don't walk out that door.
00:03:37Really?
00:03:38You're making a mistake.
00:03:39Really?
00:03:40Thank you, Amber.
00:03:41Oh, come on.
00:03:42Walk out that door, Colton.
00:03:43Okay, you did.
00:03:44Now don't walk to your car.
00:03:45Really?
00:03:46Okay, it's over for you if you do.
00:03:47Over?
00:03:48Yeah.
00:03:49Come on.
00:03:50We know each other 10 years.
00:03:51We're buddies.
00:03:5210 years is nothing in this business.
00:03:53I'm done with you.
00:03:54Oh, come on.
00:03:55The only reason the producers put me in this
00:03:57is to put my face on a video box.
00:03:59On a video box?
00:04:00Did you just time travel here from the 90s?
00:04:02This is your problem.
00:04:03You live in a world of car phones and fax machines.
00:04:05You're living in the past.
00:04:06Red Rocket was 20 years ago.
00:04:08Clown Cops was 25 years ago.
00:04:10You have to realize I only put you in this movie
00:04:11as a favor to Arnie.
00:04:12I'm making a movie about giant cockroaches, okay?
00:04:14It sells itself.
00:04:15It doesn't need this.
00:04:16Not anymore.
00:04:17Look, you don't have to say that.
00:04:18That's not really nice.
00:04:19We're friends.
00:04:20Come on.
00:04:21Not anymore.
00:04:22I'm done with you.
00:04:23Come on, Darren.
00:04:24Good morning.
00:04:25Not unless I'm down at the unemployment office.
00:04:26She won't.
00:04:27Okay?
00:04:28Bye, Colton.
00:04:29Man, get Arnie on the phone.
00:04:31A recent swarm of earthquakes has been rocking Southern California.
00:04:44Dr. Deckard Serby is here to talk about what is happening.
00:04:47Thank you for spending some time with us today, Doctor.
00:04:50This is Cole.
00:04:51You walked off the set.
00:04:52Are you kidding me right now?
00:04:54Are you kidding me, Arnie?
00:04:55It's a freaking cockroach movie.
00:04:56He didn't want to scream.
00:04:57It's what's being offered.
00:04:58It's $10,000 for one day's work.
00:05:02And I had the bag to get it for you.
00:05:05Well, you know what?
00:05:06They can keep the money, okay?
00:05:08You know, I'm looking for something with integrity and respect.
00:05:10Do you know that word, Arnie?
00:05:11Respect.
00:05:12You know, I'm better than this crap.
00:05:14No, you're not.
00:05:15I promise it, no?
00:05:18I swore to them you would be a mensch.
00:05:21Nobody is more menschy than me.
00:05:23You know that.
00:05:24Look, I just bailed you out of jail.
00:05:26You were five seconds away from Orange is the new ass in town.
00:05:30They kept me four hours after my day, okay?
00:05:33I don't care.
00:05:34You owe me money, Cole.
00:05:35Just turn your car around, please.
00:05:38Hey, go to work!
00:05:39Arnie, I got another call.
00:05:41No more bug movies.
00:05:42Don't you hang up on me.
00:05:43Don't, don't.
00:05:45Mother!
00:05:46Maggie!
00:05:47Hi, honey.
00:05:49Where the hell are you?
00:05:51It's nice to hear your voice too, sweetheart.
00:05:54The game starts in 20 minutes.
00:05:56Did you forget?
00:05:57No, honey.
00:05:58This is Los Angeles.
00:05:59Nobody gets to a game before the fourth inning.
00:06:01You know that.
00:06:03Whatever.
00:06:04I'm out of here.
00:06:06He's on his way, sweetheart.
00:06:08I've heard it before.
00:06:10Wyatt.
00:06:14Great.
00:06:15He just walked out of the house.
00:06:16What's with that kid?
00:06:18He doesn't listen anymore.
00:06:19Tell him the freeway's a parking lot.
00:06:21I'm gonna get there as soon as I can.
00:06:23You know what?
00:06:25You tell him.
00:06:27Colton West is in the news again.
00:06:29Why are you on TV?
00:06:30According to law enforcement sources, 90s movie star and action hero Colton West was booked
00:06:37last night in Santa Monica on charges of aggravated assault and resisting arrest.
00:06:42I guess that's one way to get yourself back in the public eye.
00:06:45Are you in trouble?
00:06:46Are you in now?
00:06:47Moving on to sports.
00:06:48I don't know, honey.
00:06:49I really don't know.
00:06:50You know what?
00:06:51I don't care.
00:06:52Goodbye, Colton.
00:06:53Colton.
00:06:54We're having an earthquake.
00:06:55Olivia.
00:06:56Are you okay?
00:06:57Olivia.
00:06:58Are you okay?
00:06:59Olivia.
00:07:00Are you okay?
00:07:01Olivia.
00:07:02Are you okay?
00:07:29No!
00:07:59Are you okay or live?
00:08:00No!
00:08:01Come on!
00:08:02You can't wait for me.
00:08:03Yeah, eh, come on.
00:08:08Oh, come on.
00:08:27speculative investigations.
00:08:28That's it. That's it.
00:08:32Reports are pouring in of an unprecedented geological revenge for Los Angeles.
00:08:37I'm in biological. I'm in volcanic, you moron.
00:08:41This is a freaking apocalypse!
00:08:48In a follow-up story, the Malibu bar fight involving 90s movie star and action hero Colton West,
00:08:54who was made famous by his role as the Red Rocket, and made famous the expression,
00:08:59nice anything.
00:09:01Nice nose.
00:09:03Nice tattoo.
00:09:06Nice tentacle.
00:09:09Eyewitnesses are now coming forward to say that Colton West was in fact trying to be a peacemaker.
00:09:14If that in fact is the case, then this reporter has one thing to say.
00:09:19We interrupt this program to bring you breaking news.
00:09:24The earthquakes that have been shaking the L.A. basin in the last few minutes
00:09:27are in fact tied to a volcanic eruption in the Santa Monica Mountains,
00:09:32near the Sepulveda Pass.
00:09:34Now, this would be an unprecedented volcanic event that...
00:09:38Okay!
00:09:39Why is there still no internet?
00:09:54Dammit!
00:09:56You get Colton on the phone yet?
00:09:57No, it keeps going to voicemail.
00:09:59You guys have to see this.
00:10:01One of my friends just sent this to me.
00:10:03Yeah, that's great.
00:10:10My kid has that app too.
00:10:12Take a video of anything.
00:10:13You can nuke it, alien invade it, smash it with a meteor.
00:10:16What?
00:10:17He's already killed the neighbor's cat 30 times.
00:10:19That was a big one, you guys.
00:10:21I think we should go home.
00:10:22I think you're right.
00:10:23That's a first.
00:10:25Now!
00:10:27Stop!
00:10:40Spiders!
00:10:41Did the spiders come?
00:10:42Have you seen the spiders?
00:10:43Why didn't you tell me about the bar fight?
00:10:44The bar fight was nothing!
00:10:46Nothing?
00:10:47It's all over the news.
00:10:48Colton West is in trouble again.
00:10:50Did Arnie bail you out?
00:10:51None of that matters!
00:10:52Nothing matters!
00:10:53What matters is you're okay.
00:10:54Thank God, honey, you're okay.
00:10:56You're not gonna believe what I saw.
00:10:57You're not gonna believe what's going on on the freeway.
00:10:59Where's Wyatt?
00:11:00He left, remember?
00:11:02When did he do that?
00:11:03Of course you don't remember.
00:11:05You forgot to pick him up from his game, so he just walked out of the house.
00:11:08Honey, have you seen the news?
00:11:09Yes!
00:11:10You got a bar fight.
00:11:12Call Wyatt and get him back here.
00:11:14I have been calling Wyatt.
00:11:17But of course he's not picking up.
00:11:22You know what?
00:11:23I'm just gonna go teach my kickboxing class.
00:11:25You're not teaching anything.
00:11:26You're not going anywhere, honey.
00:11:28It's not safe out there.
00:11:29I don't want you going anywhere.
00:11:30Stop it!
00:11:31You're scaring me!
00:11:32All right, I'm sorry.
00:11:33What do you want from me?
00:11:34I want you to talk to me like a normal human being.
00:11:35Okay, okay, sweetheart.
00:11:36Did you feel the earthquake?
00:11:38Yes.
00:11:39Good!
00:11:40Good!
00:11:41I felt the earthquake.
00:11:42It was an earthquake.
00:11:43Right.
00:11:44The fifth one this year.
00:11:45It's not like it's the end of the world.
00:11:46Yes, it is.
00:11:47Believe me, the Santa Monica Mountains erupted like a volcano.
00:11:50How do you know?
00:11:51I was on the freeway and I saw spiders the size of men raining on hoods and spitting fire
00:11:55out of their mouths.
00:11:56Fire out of their mouths.
00:11:58Have you been drinking again?
00:11:59No.
00:12:00You know what?
00:12:01That's it.
00:12:02I'm calling Dr. Hood.
00:12:03Honey, wait.
00:12:04No, no.
00:12:05Stop it.
00:12:06Honey, stop it.
00:12:07I am not on anything.
00:12:08I am completely sober.
00:12:09I need you to listen to me.
00:12:10Sweetheart, listen to me.
00:12:11I love you, okay?
00:12:12I need you to pack everything that's important to us.
00:12:13I want you to take the dog.
00:12:14I want you to take your jewelry.
00:12:16And I want you to pack everything up.
00:12:17And you have to listen to me.
00:12:18And we have to leave here.
00:12:23Colton?
00:12:24We don't have a dog.
00:12:27Colton?
00:12:28Colton?
00:12:29Whoa, whoa.
00:12:31Wait, wait.
00:12:32What is that for?
00:12:33I'm going to get Wyatt.
00:12:34Honey, did you call him or not?
00:12:36Okay, okay.
00:12:37I was standing here talking to you.
00:12:38He said he was going to Travis's.
00:12:40Yeah, but he's probably downtown riding bikes.
00:12:42Look, you stay in the house.
00:12:44If he comes back, you keep him here.
00:12:45You got it?
00:12:48Circuits are busy.
00:12:49Well, just keep trying.
00:12:50And tell everybody to stay off the freeway.
00:13:12Get it.
00:13:13Get it.
00:13:14Here he goes.
00:13:15Here he goes.
00:13:16Woo!
00:13:17Eli!
00:13:18You are so wicked.
00:13:19Oh, my God.
00:13:20Good dog.
00:13:21Didn't know you were coming.
00:13:22Glad you could make it out.
00:13:23Hey, Jordan.
00:13:24Sick move, man.
00:13:25Yeah.
00:13:26Should have been here five minutes ago.
00:13:27Yeah, you should have seen my girl.
00:13:28It was sick.
00:13:29So you riding with us today?
00:13:30Yeah, for sure.
00:13:31It's cool with you guys.
00:13:32Of course.
00:13:33Hell yeah.
00:13:34Cool.
00:13:35Right on.
00:13:36Let's go.
00:13:37Don't even think about it.
00:13:38I've been trying forever to get her out here.
00:13:39What did I do?
00:13:40Gave her a flirty smile.
00:13:41I did?
00:13:42Yeah.
00:13:43Oh, okay.
00:13:44Well, Eli's the one riding with her right now.
00:13:45So you might want to go jump in on that.
00:13:46Dude, I don't care about Eli.
00:13:47It...
00:13:48Don't mess this up for me, man.
00:13:49Dude, relax.
00:13:50It's...
00:13:51It's good.
00:13:52Come on.
00:13:53Let's just...
00:13:54Come on.
00:13:55Let's ride.
00:13:56Whoa!
00:13:57Dude.
00:13:58What just happened to you guys?
00:13:59Of course.
00:14:00Hell yeah.
00:14:01Cool.
00:14:02Right on.
00:14:03Let's go.
00:14:04Don't even think about it.
00:14:05I've been trying forever to get her out here.
00:14:06What did I do?
00:14:07Gave her a flirty smile.
00:14:08I did?
00:14:09Yeah.
00:14:10What just happened?
00:14:11Whoa.
00:14:12Whoa.
00:14:13Whoa.
00:14:14Whoa.
00:14:15Did you guys see that?
00:14:19Whoa, it's big.
00:14:20Yeah.
00:14:21Let's check it out.
00:14:27Are you coming?
00:14:28Yeah.
00:14:29Um...
00:14:30Yeah.
00:14:31Yeah.
00:14:37Hey, you're quiet.
00:14:38I'm not here right now.
00:14:39I didn't know you.
00:14:40Damn it.
00:14:45Damn it.
00:14:46What the...
00:14:51Shit.
00:14:53What the...
00:14:54Are you kidding me?
00:15:07Ugh.
00:15:08Ugh.
00:15:09Ugh.
00:15:10Ugh.
00:15:11Ugh.
00:15:12Ugh.
00:15:13Ugh.
00:15:14Ugh.
00:15:15Ugh.
00:15:16Ugh.
00:15:17Hello?
00:15:18Hey, Doris.
00:15:19It's Olivia.
00:15:20You're checking up on me, aren't you?
00:15:22I'm fine, darling.
00:15:2340 years here and I swear I'll never get used to these earthquakes.
00:15:35I know, right?
00:15:36Hey, listen.
00:15:37Is your power out over there?
00:15:38Yeah, a couple of minutes ago.
00:15:39Must be the whole neighborhood.
00:15:40Unique handwrested.
00:15:41No, no, no.
00:15:42I'm good.
00:15:43You okay?
00:15:44You okay?
00:15:45I don't know.
00:15:46Colton was just here and he was ranting about some kind of a disaster and...
00:15:47It actually shook me up a little.
00:15:48Earthquakes, fires, rolling blackouts, mudslides, the Gobernator.
00:15:50We're Californians.
00:15:51We've been a few worse.
00:15:52Eh.
00:15:53I guess.
00:15:54Is he still home?
00:15:55No, no.
00:15:56He went to go get Wyatt.
00:15:57Hoping they're gonna be back in a little bit.
00:15:58Whoa.
00:15:59What now?
00:16:00Olivia, can you hold on a second?
00:16:01Coco's barking.
00:16:02I need to see you.
00:16:03I need to see you.
00:16:04It's not going to see you.
00:16:05It's not going to see you.
00:16:06Yeah.
00:16:07I don't know.
00:16:09I don't know.
00:16:10Colton was just here and he was ranting about some kind of a disaster and...
00:16:12It actually shook me up a little.
00:16:14Earthquakes, fires, rolling blackouts, mudslides, the Gobernator.
00:16:17We're Californians.
00:16:18We've been a few worse.
00:16:19I need to see what's going on.
00:16:21Yeah, sure.
00:16:27Voco?
00:16:31Voco?
00:16:33Where are you?
00:16:49Voco, where are you?
00:16:51Where have you gone?
00:17:01Oh, yeah.
00:17:11Doris?
00:17:13Doris!
00:17:19Whoa, look at that.
00:17:21Whoa, whoa, guys, hold up, hold up, hold up.
00:17:32What do you think happened here?
00:17:33The ground just started breaking up.
00:17:35Looks like a bomb hit.
00:17:45Hold up, you smell that?
00:17:47Yeah, that smells like gas.
00:17:49Guys, let's get out of here.
00:17:51Yeah, I'm with Wyatt.
00:17:53Come on.
00:18:01Wyatt!
00:18:03Wyatt!
00:18:05Jordan, hold on!
00:18:07Come on!
00:18:09Something bit me!
00:18:11Go!
00:18:13Go!
00:18:14Go!
00:18:15Go!
00:18:16Stop!
00:18:29Yo!
00:18:30Yo, stop!
00:18:31Yo!
00:18:32Yo!
00:18:33Yo!
00:18:34Stop!
00:18:35Stop!
00:18:36Stop!
00:18:37Hey!
00:18:38Hey!
00:18:39Hey!
00:18:40Stop!
00:18:41Stop!
00:18:42Hey!
00:18:44Hey!
00:18:48No time for a tour, OK?
00:18:49Hey! Hey! Hey, hey! Stop! Stop! Hey!
00:18:56Look, look. No time for a tour, okay?
00:19:02Did you not see the volcano? There's a catastrophe going on.
00:19:07No, no, it's just an earthquake. No, no, it's not an earthquake, man.
00:19:10You guys are in a lot of trouble. You gotta get out of here.
00:19:13You gotta get these people to a safe place.
00:19:15Look, what's your name? Joe. Joe. Okay, Joe.
00:19:18Joe, okay, Joe. Joe, I need you to focus on me, okay?
00:19:22Joe, I need to get downtown to get my son. Can you help me?
00:19:25But just for a steal, just get a quick little selfie. Do you mind my wife?
00:19:28No, Joe, we don't have time for pictures. Joe, just please, just take me downtown.
00:19:32No, wait, you're right. No, no, no. Better.
00:19:34You and the bus, it would be like awesome PR. Just right there in front of the bus.
00:19:38Okay, that'd be great, Joe. Joe, a shot right here, right?
00:19:41Oh, you look nice. You need to move back a little bit, Joe.
00:19:43Okay, okay, okay. Move back a little bit, Joe. Okay, just keep moving back.
00:19:46Okay. Keep moving back. I got it.
00:19:48Yeah, yeah. It's called a wide shot. A wide shot?
00:19:50Wide shot, Joe. Yeah, yeah. Okay.
00:19:51Movie talk, Joe. Movie talk. You're gonna be making a movie with me.
00:19:53I'm making a movie. It's Colton West.
00:19:55And then you know what, Joe? Another movie talk.
00:19:56What?
00:19:57It's camera left. That way. Yeah, exactly, Joe.
00:19:59Okay, so move. Yeah, turn that way and look toward the trees, Joe.
00:20:02Aim the camera that way?
00:20:03That's it. Aim toward it.
00:20:04You know, I'm gonna say action, Joe, like a movie.
00:20:06Absolutely. We're making a great movie, Joe.
00:20:08Okay. This is so awesome. I mean, I'm such a big fan.
00:20:10And don't move until I say action.
00:20:14Hey! Hey!
00:20:16What?
00:20:17Ah!
00:20:18Colton West took my bus!
00:20:26Thank you very much.
00:20:27I apologize for taking control of your bus,
00:20:30but as you may or may not know,
00:20:32there was an earthquake today in Los Angeles
00:20:34that was caused by some sort of volcanic activity
00:20:37in the Santa Monica Mountains.
00:20:39Lava spiders erupted from these mountains.
00:20:41Spiders. Spiders as big as men.
00:20:45And they rained down on all of Los Angeles.
00:20:48Colton Banzai!
00:20:54Thanks, kid. Banzai to you, too.
00:21:00This way!
00:21:17Follow me. Come on.
00:21:18Let's go! Let's go!
00:21:20Hurry up! Come on!
00:21:25Eli!
00:21:26Eli!
00:21:27Eli!
00:21:29No!
00:21:30Eli!
00:21:33Eli!
00:21:34Quiet! Let's go!
00:21:41What the hell?
00:21:42Oh! Oh!
00:21:43Grab it! Grab it!
00:21:44Come here! Come here!
00:21:45Come here!
00:21:52Jordan! Jordan!
00:21:53Come on, dude! Don't leave me!
00:21:54I'm right here!
00:21:55Don't touch him!
00:21:56Don't touch it!
00:21:57Just get me out of here, okay?
00:22:01Did you see what those things did to Eli?
00:22:04What the hell are those things?
00:22:05I don't know, man.
00:22:06It bit me!
00:22:08It bit you?
00:22:09What bit you?
00:22:10I said I don't know, man!
00:22:13Okay, listen.
00:22:14Just stay here for a second, okay?
00:22:15You watch your...
00:22:16Hey, can you do that?
00:22:17Okay, I'm gonna get the first aid kit.
00:22:18I'm burnt so bad!
00:22:19Doris, are you in there?
00:22:20It's Olivia!
00:22:21Doris, I...
00:22:22I'm burnt so bad!
00:22:23I'm burnt so bad!
00:22:30Doris, are you in there?
00:22:31It's Olivia!
00:22:33Doris, I...
00:22:34What?
00:22:35What?
00:22:44Aaaaah!
00:22:45Oh my god.
00:23:05Matt.
00:23:06Wyatt.
00:23:07What?
00:23:15Oh man, the red rocket is driving my tour bus. Somebody pinch me!
00:23:19Yeah, thanks a lot kid, I appreciate it.
00:23:21Uh, listen, I know that you hear this all the time, but I am your biggest fan.
00:23:25Yeah.
00:23:26Hi, I'm Chris.
00:23:27Chris.
00:23:28Yeah.
00:23:29Not a good time to talk.
00:23:30No, no, I know. The earthquakes and everything, and the spider...
00:23:32There are spiders, buddy, as big as your freakin' body!
00:23:34No, no, no, as big as my body.
00:23:37The thing is, is that I've watched all your movies, I know all your lines, nice tattoo, duh!
00:23:42Look, Chris, this is not a good time to discuss film.
00:23:45Sure, sure, sure, sure, sure.
00:23:46But seriously, am I on, like, a hidden camera show or something?
00:23:50Because I could have swore I saw a camera right there.
00:23:52Yeah, yeah, there's cameras everywhere, look.
00:23:54I knew it.
00:23:55You wanna be a good boy?
00:23:56Yeah.
00:23:57Tell everybody to sit down and hold on.
00:23:58All right, uh, I need everybody to hold on and sit down.
00:24:02Yeah, see, the problem is that, like, 90% of these people don't speak any English.
00:24:11Shh.
00:24:14Uh, we got a problem up ahead.
00:24:19I hate spiders.
00:24:21What the hell is that?!
00:24:25What?!
00:24:26What?!
00:24:27Switching!
00:24:28Really?!
00:24:29No fair, no ride!
00:24:43Gun!
00:24:44Awesome!
00:24:46Gun!
00:24:47Awesome!
00:24:54I just wanna top now.
00:24:55You gotta do something.
00:24:56I am doing something.
00:24:57No!
00:24:58No!
00:24:59No!
00:25:00It looks like you did that movie!
00:25:02Chris, you know the difference between real life and movies?
00:25:04No!
00:25:06Well, what did I do?
00:25:07I didn't really, like, pull the emergency brake and you did something cool!
00:25:10Oh, yeah!
00:25:11No!
00:25:12Oh, yeah!
00:25:22Go!
00:25:24Go!
00:25:25Go!
00:25:27Hook the West, I love you!
00:25:30I love you, too.
00:25:32You too.
00:25:33Calm down, Chris.
00:25:39I'm not getting anything.
00:25:40How the hell are we supposed to know what's going on outside if we don't have any cell service?
00:25:44Where did you find that?
00:25:47Are you sure you know what you're doing?
00:25:48You have to trust me, okay?
00:25:50We need to treat this.
00:25:53I know, I know, I know.
00:25:54I know, I know.
00:25:56You know, when I was a little kid, I used to come here all the time.
00:26:02They would film a ton of movies here, and when my dad was shooting, he would bring me on set.
00:26:10All right, this is really going to hurt, all right?
00:26:13Oh, you think?
00:26:17What the heck are those things?
00:26:19No, they look like spiders.
00:26:21Spiders aren't that big.
00:26:23Spiders don't spray hot lava.
00:26:25I don't know, man.
00:26:26I don't know.
00:26:27It looked like some kind of spider, though.
00:26:28It burns so bad.
00:26:32We got to get some help.
00:26:34Maybe if we go up higher, we can get some cell service or something.
00:26:37Sure as hell ain't going back outside.
00:26:40You guys smell that?
00:26:47They're trying to get in.
00:26:52They're trying to get in.
00:26:53Let's get out of here.
00:26:54We got to go.
00:26:54We got to go.
00:26:55Come on, can you walk?
00:26:56Do I have a choice?
00:26:58Come on.
00:26:59Come on.
00:27:00Come on, let's go.
00:27:01Let's go.
00:27:01Come on.
00:27:02Come on.
00:27:02Come on.
00:27:02Come on.
00:27:09Come on.
00:27:09Come on.
00:27:13Creep.
00:27:16As we continue to bring you coverage of the L.A. eruptions, new details are emerging by the minute.
00:27:22We've got exclusive footage of the damage from this amazing volcanic activity.
00:27:26Now, the entire area around the 405 is closed from the 110 to the I-5, while rescue crews scramble to evacuate survivors and put out fires that are spreading across the Sepulveda Basin.
00:27:38Now, this one can be filed under only in Hollywood.
00:27:42We have unconfirmed reports of a new breed of arachnids, like these from the Hollywood blockbuster Spiders 3D that have supposedly been attacking Angelenos.
00:27:55That's right.
00:27:56Large, seemingly prehistoric spiders have been emerging from the chaos.
00:28:00And for more of this, we're going to go to Sue Schnell and her crew, who finally have been moved to a safer location.
00:28:08Sue, what can you tell us?
00:28:09That's right, Dan.
00:28:10As you can see behind me here, the National Guard has been called in to work with local law enforcement to establish a safe perimeter around the disaster zone.
00:28:19Although I haven't seen anything myself, social media is all over this, with reports of giant fire-breathing spiders that have only added to the mayhem that has gripped the region.
00:28:28Excuse me.
00:28:32In other news, related or not, Colton West has apparently hijacked a tour bus.
00:28:40Folks, we'll be back in just a minute.
00:28:41Let's do this.
00:29:08What are you waiting for?
00:29:38You messed with the wrong house.
00:29:50Uh, Mr. West, what do you think is in the blood of these things?
00:30:05Look, I don't want to study them, Chris.
00:30:07I just want to kill them.
00:30:08Yeah, well, whatever it is, it's eaten through the bus.
00:30:11What do you think happens when it hits gas?
00:30:13Uh, hang on, everybody, hang on!
00:30:15Everybody up!
00:30:20Everybody up!
00:30:21Go!
00:30:21Everybody up!
00:30:22Go, go, go!
00:30:23Go, go, go, go!
00:30:25Go! Go! Go! Go!
00:30:29Go! Go! Go!
00:30:44Everybody's off that bus, aren't they?
00:30:47Yeah.
00:30:50You saved us. You're the man.
00:30:54I didn't save anybody. Yeah!
00:30:57We still got act two and act three to go.
00:31:00Movie talk.
00:31:02Yeah. Yeah.
00:31:04Movie talk.
00:31:09But now for many Angelenos who are used to the shaking and the fires,
00:31:12it's as if nothing is happening.
00:31:14And for that story, we have Ed Mendez on Hollywood Boulevard.
00:31:17Ed, what can you tell us?
00:31:19Thanks, Dan.
00:31:20And it is true that business and leisure go on as usual,
00:31:23and most people either haven't heard about these disasters across town
00:31:26or they simply don't believe it.
00:31:28But that is quickly changing.
00:31:30Now, we are just blocks away from where a tour bus exploded,
00:31:34rocking Hollywood Boulevard, shattering windows and setting off car alarms.
00:31:38There is so much smoke in the area.
00:31:40This is as close as we can possibly get to the scene.
00:31:43But I can tell you this much.
00:31:45Some of the passengers were terrified,
00:31:47and they're claiming that creatures they believe are spiders attacked their bus.
00:31:53A literal avalanche of lava-breathing spiders. Lava-lantula.
00:31:58Were there any casualties in this explosion?
00:32:01No.
00:32:02No.
00:32:03Apparently, Colton West, who we're hearing, hijacked that very bus just moments earlier,
00:32:08was able to get everybody to safety before it blew.
00:32:12Thank you, Ed.
00:32:13Okay, we're gonna bring you more from the Santa Monica Mountains,
00:32:16where the fire crews are struggling to contain the chaos.
00:32:19Come on.
00:32:20Come on.
00:32:21Come on.
00:32:22Okay, okay.
00:32:23I need a break.
00:32:24I need a break.
00:32:25All right, all right.
00:32:26You can grab that.
00:32:27Grab that.
00:32:28Come on.
00:32:29Okay.
00:32:30Okay.
00:32:31Watch.
00:32:32Still no signal.
00:32:33You know that the cell towers are all out.
00:32:35The roof is gonna be our only chance to get out of here.
00:32:37But if all the cell towers are out,
00:32:38are we gonna get in touch with anyone?
00:32:39I got a flag down a helicopter or something.
00:32:41I don't even know.
00:32:42Hey, Wyatt.
00:32:43Come here for a second.
00:32:44All right.
00:32:45All right.
00:32:46Dude.
00:32:47I think I should stay here with her.
00:32:50I'll go call for help.
00:32:52Okay.
00:32:53Okay, yeah.
00:32:54That's good.
00:32:55Cool.
00:32:56All right.
00:32:57Come on.
00:32:58Easy.
00:32:59Travis?
00:33:00Are you trying to hit on her?
00:33:02Dude, you did the whole bandage hero thing back there.
00:33:05Gotta get my game in some time.
00:33:06Travis, Travis.
00:33:07She's injured.
00:33:08There are fire-breathing spiders chasing us right now.
00:33:11What is wrong with you?
00:33:12Come on, man.
00:33:13It's my only angle, okay?
00:33:14Your only angle?
00:33:15Are you gotta be kidding me?
00:33:22Yup, okay, we gotta go.
00:33:23Come on, let's get out of here.
00:33:31This is the mandatory evac, boys.
00:33:32No one is to be left behind, you understand?
00:33:34If you see any of those spiders, you don't even hesitate.
00:33:37You shoot to kill.
00:33:38Got it.
00:33:39Rico, Lance, I want you to take the north side of the street.
00:33:40Hernandez, I want you to come with me.
00:33:41All right, let's go.
00:33:42All right, let's go.
00:33:43We're out.
00:33:44Let's move.
00:33:45We're out.
00:33:46Let's move.
00:33:47We got your back.
00:34:00What took you so long?
00:34:02We gotta get you out of here.
00:34:03We're evacuating the whole neighborhood.
00:34:04Lead the way.
00:34:05Any luck?
00:34:06No.
00:34:07You got a phone?
00:34:08No.
00:34:09What's his name?
00:34:10Wyatt.
00:34:11Like Wyatt Earp?
00:34:12Yeah, like Wyatt Earp.
00:34:13Yeah, like Wyatt Earp.
00:34:14So what's next?
00:34:15Next?
00:34:16Next is you go home.
00:34:17No.
00:34:18You go to Kansas, Louisiana, Wyoming, you get safe.
00:34:20That's what's next.
00:34:21Des Moines.
00:34:22Des Moines.
00:34:23Yeah.
00:34:24Yeah.
00:34:25Arr, mateys.
00:34:26Who wants their photo with Pirate Jack?
00:34:27Arr!
00:34:28Colton West?
00:34:29Yeah.
00:34:30It's me, Dave Alexander.
00:34:31I did stunts on Swamp Justice.
00:34:32It's like 20 years ago.
00:34:33Dave Alexander.
00:34:34Yeah.
00:34:35Dave Alexander, yeah.
00:34:36Yeah, you look great.
00:34:37Yeah.
00:34:38How's it going?
00:34:39Yeah, you look great.
00:34:40How's it going?
00:34:41Yeah, you look great.
00:34:42How's it going?
00:34:43How's it going?
00:34:44How's it going?
00:34:45How's it going?
00:34:46How's it going?
00:34:47How's it going?
00:34:48Yeah.
00:34:49It's me, Dave Alexander.
00:34:50I did stunts on Swamp Justice 20 years ago.
00:34:52Dave!
00:34:53Dave Alexander, yeah.
00:34:54How's it going?
00:34:55Yeah, you look great.
00:34:56Thanks.
00:34:57I lost an arm on the set a couple years ago.
00:34:58Stunt went bad.
00:34:59Sorry to hear about it.
00:35:00You got pigeonholed, huh?
00:35:01Yeah.
00:35:02Not a lot of work for a one-armed stunt guy.
00:35:03Look, Dave.
00:35:04We got a problem here.
00:35:06I know.
00:35:07I saw your bus.
00:35:08Look, I got this.
00:35:09Pirate Jack.
00:35:10Dave.
00:35:11Dave.
00:35:12Sorry.
00:35:13This city is in great danger, okay?
00:35:15Deathquakes are unleashing giant spiders that are attacking the city.
00:35:18You don't know about this?
00:35:20What, with the helicopters and smoke and all?
00:35:22I just figured it was another fire in the hills.
00:35:24No, there's a volcano in the hills the size of Vesuvius.
00:35:26So does spider things for real?
00:35:28Yes.
00:35:29Look, Pirate Jack, we just need to get downtown to his son.
00:35:32You got a car, a truck, anything?
00:35:34Yeah, I can give you a lift.
00:35:35Great.
00:35:36Let's go get a beer.
00:35:37It's been too long.
00:35:38We don't have time.
00:35:39Dave, please, take me downtown.
00:35:40All right, Colt.
00:35:41Geez.
00:35:42It's happening again.
00:35:44These earthquakes are getting on my nerves.
00:35:47You find somewhere safe.
00:35:48You gotta warn people.
00:35:50What about the ride?
00:35:51Get off the street.
00:35:52Everybody, get off the street.
00:35:54Take cover.
00:35:55Everybody, get off the street.
00:35:56Get off the street.
00:35:57Look, make sure everybody finds cover and everybody gets safe.
00:36:01You got me?
00:36:02Okay.
00:36:03So I'm like your co-star.
00:36:04Yeah, you're my co-star.
00:36:05Right, right.
00:36:06Just meet me back here.
00:36:07Don't lose me.
00:36:08Okay, okay.
00:36:09Get the hell out of here!
00:36:11Dan, I have to tell you there is a growing feeling that these reports of spiders are actually
00:36:16part of a publicity stunt for an upcoming Hollywood blockbuster.
00:36:20Oh, God.
00:36:21Oh, my God.
00:36:22Oh, my God.
00:36:24No!
00:36:25!
00:36:26Oh.
00:36:27Let's go.
00:36:57Hey!
00:36:58Hey!
00:36:59Wes!
00:37:00Nice shotgun!
00:37:01I know you!
00:37:02I know you from...
00:37:03Look, you gotta get off the streets.
00:37:04There's giant spiders everywhere!
00:37:05I'd love to help you, but I got shark problems right now.
00:37:27You're welcome, kid.
00:37:52You're welcome, kid.
00:37:59Die!
00:38:00Die!
00:38:01Die!
00:38:02Die!
00:38:03Die!
00:38:04Die!
00:38:05Get it!
00:38:07Get her!
00:38:11Get in!
00:38:14Jack!
00:38:15Get out!
00:38:17Get out!
00:38:18Get out!
00:38:22Get out!
00:38:23Get out!
00:38:26Where are we going?
00:38:52We're going out of the city.
00:38:54How bad is this?
00:38:56It's bad.
00:38:57The city's completely unstable.
00:38:58Los Angeles is under a military evac.
00:38:59No, no, no, wait.
00:39:00Wait, I can't just leave.
00:39:01My family is still out there.
00:39:03All right, you don't have a choice, all right?
00:39:04This is martial law.
00:39:06Excuse me?
00:39:07Listen, I'm sorry, ma'am.
00:39:08This is completely unprecedented.
00:39:10We weren't prepared for this.
00:39:11I'm not leaving without my family.
00:39:12I need to find them.
00:39:13Well, find your family, I promise you.
00:39:15They're still alive.
00:39:16Hey, what happened to your ferret?
00:39:36How can you possibly care about something like that now?
00:39:39Giant spiders are trying to kill us.
00:39:40I don't think you guys are serious about these.
00:39:42Of course we're serious.
00:39:44Oh, they took out the blue oyster.
00:39:46I love that place.
00:39:47Jack, just get us downtown.
00:39:49How is this even possible?
00:39:50How is this happening?
00:39:51Well, you know, just last week,
00:39:52they found a new species of wasp
00:39:54in the Chinese jungle.
00:39:56Eight-inch wingspan, four-inch dinger.
00:39:58Well, these things are a lot bigger than eight inches.
00:39:59I'm just saying.
00:40:00New species, my ass.
00:40:02This is that Japanese radiation leak
00:40:04making its way over.
00:40:05Guys, let's stop discussing biology.
00:40:07Get me downtown so I can get my son.
00:40:17I can't, I can't wait for them.
00:40:19I need to sit down.
00:40:21It worked so bad.
00:40:22What, what, is it too tight?
00:40:24Okay, let me see.
00:40:25Let me see.
00:40:26Come on.
00:40:30Oh, God.
00:40:31What?
00:40:32Oh, my God.
00:40:33Shut up, shut up, shut up.
00:40:34Shut up, shut up.
00:40:35Shut up.
00:40:35It's fine.
00:40:35It's not that bad.
00:40:36Are you freaking kidding me?
00:40:36She's too young to die, Mom.
00:40:38Shut up.
00:40:38Calm down.
00:40:39Calm down.
00:40:39We can't panic right now.
00:40:40Okay?
00:40:41Calm down.
00:40:42You can't freak out on me right now.
00:40:43Okay?
00:40:44Come on.
00:40:46I got to get to the roof.
00:40:48Man, you can't leave us.
00:40:49Just stay with her, man.
00:40:50We got to try.
00:40:52Come on.
00:40:53I'm getting right back.
00:40:53Back back.
00:40:54Come on.
00:40:54AHHHHHH!
00:40:57No, no, no, no, no!
00:41:01No, no!
00:41:05What the hell is that?
00:41:08What the hell?
00:41:08Mama!
00:41:09Mama!
00:41:10Move, move, move!
00:41:12Why do we stop it?
00:41:22Something's wrong.
00:41:29This is going to get bad really, really fast.
00:41:33Let's get out of here.
00:41:35We're not going anywhere.
00:41:37Oh, man, these were brand new.
00:41:39Uh, fellas, look.
00:41:42Man, I hate being right.
00:41:51Get in the museum!
00:41:53I can see them!
00:41:54Because it's the only building that has spiders on it!
00:41:56Not yet.
00:41:57They look pretty determined.
00:42:02Barrage, where's the doors?
00:42:03Close them up!
00:42:04Close them up!
00:42:05Come on!
00:42:06Throw everything you can!
00:42:12Come on, hurry up!
00:42:14Anything!
00:42:15Just grab anything!
00:42:16Grab it on!
00:42:17I got one more!
00:42:18I got one more!
00:42:19Done!
00:42:23Feel safe?
00:42:24Not even a little bit.
00:42:25No.
00:42:26You got a plan?
00:42:27Run!
00:42:28Run!
00:42:28Run!
00:42:28Run!
00:42:29Run!
00:42:34We're not getting out of here.
00:42:35We're not getting out of here.
00:42:36There's spiders outside.
00:42:37We gotta find somewhere to hide.
00:42:38There's nowhere to hide.
00:42:40When those things want to find you, they will.
00:42:43Who are you?
00:42:44I am Dr. Eric von Struble.
00:42:47I work here in the museum.
00:42:48What are you still doing here?
00:42:49I'm a scientist.
00:42:51For good or bad, these are the kind of moments that we live for.
00:42:55Well, you're not going to live for much longer if you stick around here, Doc.
00:42:57Yes, I am acutely aware of that possibility, but I'm not done.
00:43:03Done?
00:43:04Done with what?
00:43:10The heat grid is like an interconnected network.
00:43:14Lava tubes, probably, with the temperature increasing exponentially.
00:43:19So why didn't anybody say anything about this before?
00:43:21We didn't see it coming.
00:43:23It happened too quickly.
00:43:25I mean, we're talking five days ago, and it's like, oh, that's odd.
00:43:30Then, under a week later, the hills are active volcanoes.
00:43:35What should have taken over a million years almost happened overnight.
00:43:39So if this is correct, this explains why these things are exploding all over the city.
00:43:44This city is a ticking time bomb.
00:43:47Wait, what does this have to do with spiders attacking the city?
00:43:49Actually, everything.
00:43:52When I compared the pattern of the lava tube network, it had a very close structure to that of an insect colony.
00:44:02So wait, they had something in common?
00:44:04They're exactly the same.
00:44:06The volcanoes and the spiders are one.
00:44:09And right here, this would be the queen's chamber.
00:44:22If you kill the mama-lantula, you kill them all.
00:44:26You better go check on that front door.
00:44:35What are you doing?
00:44:36Science class is over, Doc.
00:44:38I'm going to go get my kid.
00:44:40And when we're done, you and I, Jack, are going to have that beer.
00:44:44You're buying.
00:44:45Thanks.
00:44:47Oh, that is so badass.
00:44:50Wait, no, no, no.
00:44:51I meant you're badass, not I'm badass.
00:44:55Guys?
00:44:56Cole?
00:45:04Come in, evac 670.
00:45:06What's your 20?
00:45:07This is evac 670.
00:45:08We are westbound on Forest Lawn.
00:45:10670, turn around immediately.
00:45:12The Forest Lawn area is highly unstable right now.
00:45:14Do you have an alternate route?
00:45:16Negative.
00:45:16Just get off that road.
00:45:20What's happening?
00:45:21I want you to stay here.
00:45:23Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.
00:45:23You can't just leave us here.
00:45:25All right, I want you to get down, and I want you to stay down.
00:45:28This should keep your safe.
00:45:31I'm not good at staying down.
00:45:32If you want to live, you get your ass under that fire blanket.
00:45:36I don't need to curse.
00:45:43This place is like a freaking maze.
00:45:45I think there's a staircase at the end of the hour.
00:45:46What do you think?
00:45:47Oh, God.
00:45:47Oh, God.
00:45:47Oh, God.
00:45:50Oh, God.
00:45:53Oh, God.
00:46:02These things are down to get up.
00:46:03Shh, shh, shh, keep your face down.
00:46:05Come on.
00:46:11Oh, Lord.
00:46:12Come on, come on.
00:46:16Let's go, let's go, let's go.
00:46:20I think it's gone.
00:46:24I got it!
00:46:28You got it! You got it!
00:46:32I got this!
00:46:36I got this!
00:46:40I got it!
00:46:44I thought it was gonna work!
00:46:48I didn't!
00:46:58We're still many of them, man.
00:47:00We gotta get these civilians out of here.
00:47:02They're green fire, man!
00:47:04I can see that.
00:47:06I'm coming!
00:47:08We're closing in!
00:47:10We are not going down like this.
00:47:12Do you have a shot?
00:47:14We gotta move now, man.
00:47:16Yeah, do what?
00:47:18We're gonna head back to the city?
00:47:20Well, we can't go this way, man.
00:47:22But we need reinforcements.
00:47:24Man, we are the reinforcements!
00:47:26Clever girl.
00:47:38Clever girl.
00:47:40Look!
00:47:42Oh, no!
00:47:44Mm.
00:47:46Oh, no.
00:48:00Let's go.
00:48:30Oh! Ew! Ew! Ew! Ew! Oh my god.
00:48:55Evac 670, can you read me?
00:48:58Hello?
00:48:59Can you copy the last transmission? Get off Forest Lawn.
00:49:02All your men are gone. Everyone is dead. Do you hear me?
00:49:06Who is this?
00:49:07My name is Olivia West. I'm the sole survivor.
00:49:11Well, please be advised to get out of Los Angeles immediately.
00:49:14Yeah, well, thanks for the great advice. But I can't really do that. My family is still here in L.A.
00:49:18Repeat, Los Angeles is highly unstable right now.
00:49:21Why don't you give me some good information? Like, where's the freaking key?
00:49:24There is no key, ma'am. Flip two switches, march battery and run. You're advised to get out as soon as possible.
00:49:31Not without my family.
00:49:33You still with us? How are you doing? How are you doing, Jordan?
00:49:35I don't know. Jordan! Jordan! Jordan! Jordan! Jordan!
00:49:36Oh, she's freaking out, man. Jordan, come on. Come on. Jordan, look at me. Look at me.
00:49:40Uh, water. Water! Water. Get some water!
00:49:41From where?
00:49:42I don't know, man. Jordan, look at me. Jordan! Jordan! Jordan! Jordan!
00:49:48Oh, she's freaking out, man. Jordan, come on. Come on. Jordan, look at me. Look at me!
00:49:54Uh, water! Water. Get some water.
00:49:55From where?
00:49:56I don't know, man. Jordan, look at me. No, come on. Jordan. Jordan! Jordan! Jordan!
00:50:00Come on. No, stay with us. Come on. Jordan. No, what the f-? Oh.
00:50:09Oh, is she dead?
00:50:12No. Come on.
00:50:18Oh, Jesus.
00:50:20Oh! Jordan!
00:50:23Jordan.
00:50:26Dude.
00:50:30Jordan.
00:50:34No! No!
00:50:38Oh, my God!
00:50:40Oh, my God!
00:50:42What the?
00:50:43No! Phil!
00:50:45Oh, Phil!
00:50:47Oh, Phil! You're right!
00:50:49No!
00:51:08Oh, Phil!
00:51:09Oh, Phil.
00:51:10You're right, Phil.
00:51:11Oh, Phil.
00:51:12What the hell?
00:51:14Oh, Phil.
00:51:16Oh, Phil.
00:51:17Oh, Phil.
00:51:18Oh, Phil.
00:51:19Oh, Phil.
00:51:21Oh, Phil.
00:51:22Oh, Phil.
00:51:23My phone. My phone's working.
00:51:27It's from Wyatt.
00:51:29He's trapped.
00:51:31He's at Hanson Studios.
00:51:33It's at Samithan Olympic. We gotta get there.
00:51:35Hey, guys.
00:51:39That is a very large arachnid.
00:51:43It's a freakin' Kraken.
00:51:53And it's coming this way.
00:51:55Get back! I'm a Lancelot!
00:52:13Come on!
00:52:25Too many of them! We gotta get out of here!
00:52:33Jack!
00:52:39Jack!
00:52:43Jack!
00:52:45Jack!
00:52:47Chris!
00:52:49You got this!
00:52:51Jack!
00:52:53Jack!
00:52:57Jack!
00:52:59Jack!
00:53:01Jack!
00:53:03Jack!
00:53:05Jack!
00:53:07Jack!
00:53:09Jack!
00:53:11Jack!
00:53:12Jack!
00:53:14Jack!
00:53:16Jack!
00:53:18Jack!
00:53:20Jack!
00:53:22Jack!
00:53:24Jack!
00:53:26Jack!
00:53:28Jack!
00:53:30Could there be a prehistoric link to these spiders?
00:53:32That's what's trending on social media after scientific reports date these arachnids back to the Jurassic era.
00:53:38Meanwhile, Mid-Wilshire is the latest hotspot where the famed La Brea tar pits have been decimated by dozens of lavalanchulas.
00:53:45And at the center of it all, action hero Colton West.
00:53:48I would say he saved dozens of people on Hollywood Boulevard.
00:53:54You okay? You okay? You hurt?
00:53:57What?
00:53:57Are you hurt? Are you bleeding anywhere?
00:53:59I can't hear you. I think I lost my hearing.
00:54:01No, you didn't.
00:54:03He's a helicopter.
00:54:08Looks like you're wrapped, kid.
00:54:10We're going back to Des Moines.
00:54:12You're not coming with us?
00:54:13I gotta find my kid.
00:54:15I hope you find him.
00:54:16Yeah, I better. My wife will kill me.
00:54:19You saved my life.
00:54:21No, we saved each other.
00:54:23Kid, kid, let go.
00:54:29No, no, no.
00:54:30Let go of me.
00:54:30No, no, no, no.
00:54:32Okay.
00:54:33Go.
00:54:33Sorry.
00:54:33Movie talk.
00:54:34Movie talk.
00:54:35Movie talk.
00:54:37You're crazy for staying.
00:54:39Yeah, of course I'm crazy.
00:54:40I'm an actor.
00:54:41Good point.
00:54:42I printed out the thermal map of Los Angeles.
00:54:45The orange bits are the lava tubes.
00:54:47Stay away from them if you can.
00:54:49Thanks, Doc.
00:54:49Be safe.
00:54:50Be safe.
00:54:50Movie talk.
00:55:20You want some of this?
00:55:26Come on.
00:55:28Christmas, I got some for you.
00:55:30Christmas for you.
00:55:32Come on.
00:55:34Get in.
00:55:35Get in.
00:55:36Come on.
00:55:36Come on.
00:55:40Come on.
00:55:41I sleep.
00:55:42I sleep.
00:55:47Okay.
00:55:50What are you doing at the tar pits?
00:56:00I'm trying to find our son.
00:56:02I got stuck.
00:56:03Stuck?
00:56:05Who gets stuck at the tar pits?
00:56:06I mean, Wilshire Boulevard?
00:56:07Really?
00:56:08Everyone knows you take Olympic dance now.
00:56:10Thanks, honey.
00:56:12You okay?
00:56:13Yeah.
00:56:14I'm okay.
00:56:14Because I'm seeing you.
00:56:17How'd you find me?
00:56:19Fifteen years of putting out your fires,
00:56:21I pretty much just follow the smoke.
00:56:23Really?
00:56:24No.
00:56:25You're all over the news.
00:56:26So I got a text from Wyatt.
00:56:30He's okay.
00:56:31You did?
00:56:31Yeah.
00:56:32He's at Hanson Street Studios.
00:56:34Hanson Street.
00:56:35Yeah.
00:56:36Very ironic, huh?
00:56:37Yeah.
00:56:38That's when we first met.
00:56:41You remember?
00:56:42Oh, honey.
00:56:43Yeah, of course I remember.
00:56:45Really?
00:56:46Yeah.
00:56:47So romantic.
00:56:49I love you, honey.
00:56:51I love you, too.
00:56:54Let's get downtown.
00:56:55We'll get Wyatt.
00:56:56Get the hell out of this city before it goes.
00:56:58Mayday, mayday.
00:57:01This is evac 670.
00:57:03Colton West.
00:57:04We need help.
00:57:05This is an emergency.
00:57:06Mayday, mayday.
00:57:07Please come in.
00:57:09Listen, listen.
00:57:10We're saying something.
00:57:10We're reporting the local world
00:57:12trying to battle these fighters
00:57:13and evacuate citizens.
00:57:14We keep getting new reports
00:57:16of lavalangelas erupting
00:57:17from beneath the ground,
00:57:18spewing fire and wreaking havoc
00:57:20all over the Los Angeles basin.
00:57:22Nowhere seems to be safe.
00:57:23Evacuation efforts have been halted
00:57:25and everyone is in the same case.
00:57:27I've heard enough.
00:57:47Come on.
00:57:52Yeah, yeah.
00:57:54Here I come, son.
00:57:55Let me get up.
00:58:00Get down, baby.
00:58:03Hey, get down.
00:58:04Get down.
00:58:07Are you okay?
00:58:12Are you okay?
00:58:14Daddy, daddy.
00:58:16Dad.
00:58:17Mom.
00:58:18Oh, my God.
00:58:18Why do you have a military truck?
00:58:25You know your mom.
00:58:27She likes everything big.
00:58:28Yes, I do.
00:58:29You okay?
00:58:31Are you all right?
00:58:31Did you check yourself?
00:58:32Yeah, I could.
00:58:33Are you bleeding anywhere?
00:58:33I'm good.
00:58:34Hey, what about the others?
00:58:35Are they okay?
00:58:36Are you making it?
00:58:39I know.
00:58:40I know.
00:58:42How on earth did you stay alive?
00:58:46This.
00:58:48This.
00:58:48I sprayed them with this and I hated it.
00:58:50Just a fire extinguisher?
00:58:51No, honey.
00:58:52This is compressed nitrogen.
00:58:54You have more of these?
00:58:56That's the last one.
00:58:59Nitrogen.
00:59:00What?
00:59:01There's shops around here.
00:59:02Shop?
00:59:03You want to shop?
00:59:04No, honey.
00:59:05This nitrogen.
00:59:06This is what almost killed me this morning on the set.
00:59:10This is going to keep us alive.
00:59:11We got to get out of here.
00:59:12We really got to go.
00:59:13And even if we do, these spiders aren't just going to let us leave.
00:59:16Dad.
00:59:18We're going to have to fight.
00:59:21That's what we're going to do, son.
00:59:25Come on.
00:59:35Ladies and gentlemen, just moments ago, the President of the United States declared the
00:59:40L.A. Basin a disaster zone.
00:59:42I can tell you the situation has gone from bad to worse.
00:59:46Now, the Santa Monica Mountains continue to destabilize, and we're showing you live footage
00:59:51from Malibu where the latest eruption has occurred.
00:59:53Several freeways have been severely damaged, leaving authorities to advise everyone to
00:59:59stay in place.
01:00:00This map shows the damage spread across the L.A. Basin, but in the midst of all this chaos,
01:00:06there are selfless acts of heroism, as reported by our own Lisa Miller.
01:00:10Yeah, I just want to say that I wouldn't be standing here if it wasn't for Colton West.
01:00:14He's a real-life action hero.
01:00:16Well, I'm sure he had some help.
01:00:18Did you know he used to be an actor?
01:00:19Colton West, he's saving my life for your super action.
01:00:23Well, there you have it.
01:00:24In the stranger-than-fiction category, and in the midst of the biggest catastrophe this
01:00:29city has ever seen, a motion picture action hero might very well be a real live action
01:00:36hero.
01:00:36Back to you.
01:00:37Thank you, Lisa.
01:00:38Has he lost his mind?
01:00:40Who the hell's calling here?
01:00:42It's a spider.
01:00:42Don't answer.
01:00:43Who is it?
01:00:47It's Colton West.
01:00:49What?
01:00:49What?
01:00:53Wyatt, Olivia, get in here, get in here.
01:00:55Oh, Colton.
01:00:56Colton West, man.
01:00:58You are all over the news.
01:01:00Teddy, what are you still doing here?
01:01:01We left this at the same time you did.
01:01:04Then all hell broke loose.
01:01:06Freeways are shut down, and those spiders are killing anything that moves.
01:01:09I know.
01:01:10There's no getting in and out of L.A. now.
01:01:11Well, our boys over at Studio Wings said that they had some helicopters.
01:01:16They were supposed to be on their way, but they didn't show up, and we haven't been able
01:01:19to get a hold of them since.
01:01:21Bigger question is, what are you doing here?
01:01:24I got a plan.
01:01:25You've always got a plan, Colton West.
01:01:28Is this the original Red Rocket?
01:01:30Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey.
01:01:32NASA made that suit.
01:01:34Ah, the days of the big budgets.
01:01:36Sun, this suit, this helmet, they paid for our house.
01:01:42Paid for clothes you're wearing, your education.
01:01:46Paid for everything.
01:01:49So why do you still keep them?
01:01:50Because I'm a sucker for nostalgia.
01:01:54Yeah.
01:01:55How you doing, young man?
01:01:57I always thought one day we'd make a sequel.
01:02:00Well, if things ever get normal, maybe he'll fly again.
01:02:02I wish we could all fly away from here.
01:02:04We're going to make a break for it, Colt.
01:02:06You with us?
01:02:07No, you're not going out there.
01:02:09I wouldn't count on the military.
01:02:11They're sending in a ground evac, but who knows when that's going to happen.
01:02:14So we're all just sitting ducks?
01:02:16No.
01:02:17Ted, I'm not a sitting duck, and neither are you.
01:02:19We're not giving up.
01:02:20I love your attitude, baby, but the fact is...
01:02:23Marty, I've been in this town for 30 years.
01:02:25It has not killed me.
01:02:26It's not going to kill me now.
01:02:27Now, Wyatt said this kept them alive.
01:02:30Nitrogen.
01:02:31You using it on the set today, weren't you?
01:02:33You used this on them?
01:02:36Yeah.
01:02:36It worked?
01:02:38Son of a gun.
01:02:39Do you have any more?
01:02:40How much are we talking?
01:02:42And what do you have in mind, Colt?
01:02:45I need a map of downtown.
01:02:49All right.
01:02:51This is their nest.
01:02:52This is how they get around.
01:02:54This is where they come out.
01:02:55It's all over L.A.
01:02:58Right here.
01:03:00This large chamber.
01:03:02That's where the Queen is.
01:03:06Okay.
01:03:07If this map is accurate, and it is, that's no more than just a few blocks away.
01:03:11That's right.
01:03:12Those canisters of liquid nitrogen.
01:03:15We need to wrap bombs around them.
01:03:18Can you do that?
01:03:19I still have a few dozen sticks of C4 around.
01:03:22I don't see that as a problem.
01:03:24And we could detonate them by remote.
01:03:28Can you do that?
01:03:30Not a problem.
01:03:31If we make enough of these canisters,
01:03:34and drop them down in the open craters,
01:03:37then we can detonate them.
01:03:39And we can smoke this Queen right out of the nest.
01:03:43Can you do that?
01:03:45Not a problem.
01:03:48I don't know much about this sort of thing.
01:03:50But this Queen,
01:03:52she's going to be a lot bigger than the others, right?
01:03:54Yeah, but she's going to be huge.
01:03:55And really pissed.
01:03:58So what?
01:03:58We kill the Queen?
01:04:00Where does that even get us?
01:04:02Oh, no, no.
01:04:03What he's saying, it's a hive mentality.
01:04:05You see, if you kill the Queen,
01:04:08you kill them all.
01:04:09It's like on the insect channel.
01:04:12That's right.
01:04:13I hate bugs.
01:04:16Let's kill the bitch.
01:04:17Ladies and gentlemen,
01:04:32tonight,
01:04:33I call upon you,
01:04:34the good people of the motion picture industry.
01:04:37It is you
01:04:38who works tirelessly
01:04:4012, 14, 16 hours a day,
01:04:43giving pints and pints of your blood
01:04:47for our great nation.
01:04:48Yes, some might say it's just entertainment,
01:04:52but we know better.
01:04:53Our movies are where the hopes and dreams
01:04:56of this great nation are born.
01:04:58Ladies and gentlemen,
01:05:00I'm chagrined to say that tonight might be our last production.
01:05:03But I beseech you,
01:05:05please think another way.
01:05:07Tonight is our opening night.
01:05:09Tonight is the night that we save our city,
01:05:12our homes,
01:05:13our families.
01:05:15That we believe in a tomorrow.
01:05:17A tomorrow where the Lakers have another three-peat.
01:05:20What about the Clippers?
01:05:22Clippers, too.
01:05:23A tomorrow
01:05:24where the Kings sip again
01:05:26from the Stanley Cup.
01:05:28What about the Ducks?
01:05:30The Ducks, too.
01:05:31And a tomorrow
01:05:32where the Dodgers,
01:05:33only the Dodgers,
01:05:35win the World Series.
01:05:38Ladies and gentlemen,
01:05:38tonight,
01:05:39I ask you to unify as a city.
01:05:42Above the line,
01:05:43below the line.
01:05:45Tonight,
01:05:45we draw the line.
01:05:47This is your city.
01:05:48This is my city.
01:05:49I was born in this city.
01:05:50I'm gonna die in this city.
01:05:52But not tonight!
01:05:54Viva Los Angelinos!
01:05:58Viva Los Angelinos!
01:06:00Viva Los Angelinos!
01:06:00Viva Los Angelinos!
01:06:02Viva Los Angelinos!
01:06:12All right.
01:06:14Cole.
01:06:14Cole.
01:06:16Listen.
01:06:18I'm thinking about this.
01:06:19Mm-hmm.
01:06:19The Queen.
01:06:20Yeah?
01:06:21You've got to get really close
01:06:22to take her out.
01:06:24And bullets aren't gonna do it.
01:06:25You need an explosion.
01:06:27And you know what happens?
01:06:28If she explodes...
01:06:29It's a death wish
01:06:30for anyone nearby.
01:06:31Okay, so let's use a remote.
01:06:33It's moving,
01:06:34and it's very hot.
01:06:35Who's gonna slap it on anyway?
01:06:37And besides, remember,
01:06:38this is C4.
01:06:39That stuff's gonna go off
01:06:40by itself,
01:06:40like it or not.
01:06:41So how long?
01:06:4210, 20 seconds tops.
01:06:44Look, man,
01:06:46that was a really good speech,
01:06:47but, um...
01:06:48Okay, great speech,
01:06:50but we're gonna need
01:06:50more than speeches.
01:06:51Just make sure those bombs
01:06:54go off.
01:06:55Oh, we will.
01:07:02Both just stay here,
01:07:04and you'll be safe, okay?
01:07:06Okay.
01:07:07And Wyatt,
01:07:08we're counting on you, okay?
01:07:10Okay.
01:07:11Be a good boy.
01:07:11I will.
01:07:12You watch your mother.
01:07:14All right.
01:07:16Promise me you'll come back.
01:07:17Don't worry.
01:07:27And how about you?
01:07:29You wanna go to Dodger game
01:07:30when I come back?
01:07:31Yeah.
01:07:32Hate to interrupt
01:07:33a family moment,
01:07:34but it's go time.
01:07:37Okay?
01:07:37I love you.
01:07:44It's gonna be okay.
01:07:57This is Alpha.
01:07:59We are nearing
01:07:59the first drop.
01:08:00The first bomb is the way.
01:08:14Roger that.
01:08:15This is Bravo Team.
01:08:16We're nearing
01:08:17the second crater.
01:08:25Two is the way.
01:08:26Repeat.
01:08:27Two is the way.
01:08:27I'll show them.
01:08:28Stupid spider.
01:08:29Good kung fu fighting.
01:08:31It is eerily quiet
01:08:33on the streets
01:08:33of Los Angeles
01:08:34as the greater metro area
01:08:36smolders under
01:08:37the crippling volcanic eruptions
01:08:39and the onslaught
01:08:40of lavalanchulas
01:08:41that have been thrust up
01:08:42from their nest,
01:08:44decimating everything
01:08:44in their path.
01:08:46Now, the residents
01:08:46that were evacuated earlier
01:08:47are long gone.
01:08:49Hopefully to safety.
01:08:50Those who remain
01:08:51are hunkered down
01:08:52under martial law.
01:08:54Let me tell you,
01:08:54even though this small area
01:08:55might seem safe for now,
01:08:57no one inside the city
01:08:58and the ring of fire
01:08:59are safe,
01:09:01rescue efforts
01:09:02are still being hindered.
01:09:03So all of these brave residents,
01:09:05all they can do
01:09:06is sit and wait
01:09:07and pray.
01:09:11Keep it moving.
01:09:12Keep it moving.
01:09:13And I'm going to need
01:09:25some backup.
01:09:26There's lots of spiders here.
01:09:27Don't worry, Jetty.
01:09:29Cavalry's on its way.
01:09:38I'm here.
01:09:41I need some help here.
01:10:01I need some help.
01:10:02Full power.
01:10:03Blood attack.
01:10:03I need some help.
01:10:06Hell!
01:10:06Naruto Fame!
01:10:07Cincinnati!
01:10:08Yes!
01:10:09Oh...
01:10:10Oh...
01:10:15...
01:10:16...
01:10:16...
01:10:16...
01:10:16...
01:10:17...
01:10:17Oh!
01:10:44What?
01:10:45They're gone.
01:10:46Well it worked, didn't it?
01:10:47Yeah.
01:10:49Okay, what's the plan, Colt?
01:10:50Uh, you know how we always say that making a film is like war?
01:10:54Yeah.
01:10:55Well, let's hope this war is like making a film.
01:10:58What does that mean?
01:10:59It means I need you to plant those bombs.
01:11:01Okay, but what does that mean?
01:11:02It means I need you to plant those bombs.
01:11:04What are you doing? What are you doing?
01:11:05Come back here, Colt 44!
01:11:07Come back here!
01:11:09Uh, your attention please, Colton has gone rogue.
01:11:12Everybody keep going, the plan remains the same.
01:11:14Repeat, it remains the same.
01:11:16Alright, out.
01:11:17What is he doing?
01:11:18He's just being your father.
01:11:21Get moving laddies, we've got to win this one.
01:11:24Freedom!
01:11:25No!
01:11:26No!
01:11:27No!
01:11:28No!
01:11:29No!
01:11:30No!
01:11:31No!
01:11:32No!
01:11:33No!
01:11:34Nope!
01:11:35No!
01:11:36No!
01:11:37No!
01:11:38No!
01:11:47No!
01:11:48No, no!
01:11:49No!
01:11:50No.
01:11:51No!
01:11:52No!
01:11:52Damn it!
01:12:22Morty, come in, Morty.
01:12:50There you are, man.
01:12:51Hey, where are you?
01:12:52Exactly.
01:12:53Where are you?
01:12:54You know it a little bit.
01:12:56What's our status?
01:12:57We got the bombs planted.
01:12:59Red 3 standing by.
01:13:00Red 2 standing by.
01:13:01Red 5 standing by.
01:13:02R2, shut up.
01:13:03I'm busy, man.
01:13:04Standing by, man.
01:13:05Great.
01:13:06Counting on you, Morty.
01:13:08Counting on you.
01:13:10It's gonna be alright, Colt.
01:13:12You just make sure you don't get dead.
01:13:15Colt.
01:13:16I really hope you're there, because if you've got a plan, now's time.
01:13:20Yeah, I got a plan.
01:13:21It's go time.
01:13:22Go time?
01:13:23Go where time?
01:13:24Where are you?
01:13:25Where are you?
01:13:26I found a little party I want to drop in on.
01:13:31Make some music, Teddy.
01:13:32On my mark, 3, 2, 1.
01:13:33We're rolling.
01:13:343, 2, 1.
01:13:35We're rolling.
01:13:36We're rolling.
01:13:37We're rolling.
01:13:38We're rolling.
01:13:39We're rolling.
01:13:41There's no party I want to drop in on.
01:13:54Make some music, Teddy.
01:13:56On my mark, three, two, one.
01:13:59We're rolling.
01:14:11One didn't go off. Push it again.
01:14:21I'm pushing it.
01:14:36Incoming! Incoming!
01:14:38Let's go! Go! Go! Go!
01:14:41Get out of here!
01:14:43Get out of here!
01:14:45Hold on!
01:14:46Hold it!
01:14:49Close it up, close it up!
01:14:50Ah!
01:15:04Go!
01:15:05Mama's home.
01:15:16If anybody's got a plan B, uh, how about now?
01:15:26She's not just bad, she's big.
01:15:30Really big.
01:15:35Oh, C4 now.
01:15:38Oh, you're a killer.
01:15:39What? Where the hell is it?
01:15:41I know where it is.
01:15:54All right, Colt.
01:15:56Action.
01:15:57Unbelievable.
01:16:02Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh.
01:16:05Go, go, go get out of there.
01:16:13Go, go, go.
01:16:17Get out!
01:16:20Ow!
01:16:50Nice!
01:16:51Ow!
01:16:52And in breaking news, while airlifts are finally underway evacuating the rest of the civilians
01:17:18from the area, one man and his ragtag team of, and you're hearing this right, a film crew
01:17:24actually devised a successful plan to take down the Queen Lavalantula and send the rest
01:17:29of these creatures back down to their fiery home, thousands of feet below the city.
01:17:34That hero is none other than Colton West, who, against all odds, risked life and limb to save
01:17:40the still great city.
01:17:42And all that this reporter can say, in the now infamous words of Colton West, is nice
01:17:47job.
01:17:48Oh!
01:17:49Oh!
01:17:50Oh!
01:17:51Oh!
01:17:52Oh!
01:17:53Oh!
01:17:54Oh!
01:17:55Oh!
01:17:56Oh!
01:17:57Oh!
01:17:58Oh!
01:17:59Hey, buddy!
01:18:00Come on!
01:18:01Come on!
01:18:02Over here!
01:18:03Hey, come on!
01:18:04Come on!
01:18:05Come on!
01:18:06We got you!
01:18:07Oh, thank you!
01:18:08We got you!
01:18:09Oh!
01:18:10Oh!
01:18:11Oh!
01:18:12Oh!
01:18:13Oh!
01:18:14Oh!
01:18:15You're welcome!
01:18:16You're welcome!
01:18:17You're welcome!
01:18:18Dad!
01:18:19Dad!
01:18:20Dad!
01:18:21Dad!
01:18:22Dad!
01:18:23Dad!
01:18:24I was watching the news the whole time!
01:18:25It was so cool!
01:18:26Oh!
01:18:27Oh!
01:18:28Oh!
01:18:29Oh!
01:18:30Oh!
01:18:31Oh!
01:18:32Oh!
01:18:33Oh!
01:18:34Oh!
01:18:35Oh!
01:18:36Oh!
01:18:37Oh!
01:18:38Oh!
01:18:39Oh!
01:18:40Oh!
01:18:41This family did it!
01:18:42Yeah, we did it!
01:18:43We all did!
01:18:44I think I did a lot of it!
01:18:45But I think we did it together!
01:18:46I smell a sequel coming on!
01:18:48Red Rocket 2?
01:18:50Attack of the Lavalanchulas!
01:18:51Ah!
01:18:52Everybody gets a suit!
01:18:53I want a suit!
01:18:54Well, you can put me in mine!
01:18:56Oh!
01:18:57Like that?
01:18:58Oh!
01:18:59Yeah, baby!
01:19:00Wow!
01:19:01Oh, yeah!
01:19:02Oh, yeah, baby!
01:19:03Red Rocket!
01:19:04In the house, yo!
01:19:05We're thinking about all kinds of Red Rocket products!
01:19:07Yeah!
01:19:08Red Rocket Tacos!
01:19:09Red Rocket Lipstick!
01:19:10Red Rocket Lipstick!
01:19:11Red Rocket Burritos!
01:19:12Red Ritos!
01:19:13Red Rocket Films!
01:19:14Red Rocket Rockets!
01:19:15Red Rocket Rockets!
01:19:16Red Rocket Rockets!
01:19:17Red Rocket Rockets!
01:19:18Yeah!
01:19:19The West has saved Los Angeles!
01:19:21Authorities say publicly, not one country has stopped the lives at all!
01:19:24The West is in real life here!
01:19:26Many wonder aloud if this is the last we've seen of the Lavalanchulas!
01:19:30Red Rocket Parties!
01:19:31Red Rocket!
01:19:32Red Thatsams!
01:19:33TALцу!
01:19:34Red Lions!
01:19:36Red Yellow crosses!
01:19:37Thales!
01:19:38Red Maarie!
01:19:39Red Grid!
01:19:40RedArmorald!
01:19:41Who's running me?
01:19:42nonprofits are dead.
01:19:43I'm sorry!
01:19:44Redluence!
01:19:45White Yellow presoterios!
01:19:46Red chloride!
01:19:47Red Люioni!
01:19:48Red 바� 1400!
01:19:49Redities!
01:19:50Red Ages!
01:19:51Creator!
01:19:53pensa!
01:19:54Red dwelling!
01:19:55BifAT!
01:19:56Reduktion!
01:19:57Redereye!
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