00:30Ladies and gentlemen, please welcome the World Heavyweight Champion, CM Punk!
00:44He's wasting no time grabbing that mic.
00:46It's all business CM Punk right now.
00:49He's got that look in his eye, he's not to be trifled with.
00:54And when he rips the mic flag off and throws it at you,
00:57you know it's about to be serious.
01:00CM Punk! CM Punk! CM Punk! CM Punk! CM Punk! CM Punk! CM Punk!
01:19I was forced to miss two consecutive Monday Night Raws
01:24because some people that are smarter than me
01:26wouldn't medically clear me to compete or fly.
01:30If you saw War Games, you saw what happened to me.
01:34And I'm here to tell you, ladies and gentlemen, it hurt.
01:37But it wasn't as painful as the last two weeks of me sitting my ass on my couch
01:42listening to Bron Breaker talk.
01:46Bron Breaker, you cross-eyed Neanderthal Nepo baby!
01:52You came out here in front of the world and with your full chest talked about how you were mad that I tried to end your career and break your neck in the War Games.
02:06And I understand that brains don't exactly run in your family.
02:11But you didn't sign up for board games, you signed up for war, son.
02:17And congratulations, your team won.
02:24But you had the audacity to stand in the champ's ring and talk about how you're disappointed and how easy it was to beat CM Punk.
02:35You talk about how easy it was to pin my shoulders to the mat.
02:39You talk about how you want 2011 CM Punk.
02:44And I'm here to tell you, kid, you can't handle 2025 CM Punk without a lot of help from your friends.
02:55I'm talking about an assist from a Brock Lesnar F5 or a Bronson Reed Tsunami or that human septic tank Drew McEnpyle splitting me open with the cage.
03:07Oh, and the cherry on top of this crap sundae is your new mystery mask man.
03:14So yeah, congratulations, Bronny.
03:17You pinned me, which puts you in line for a title shot.
03:23But you didn't do it alone, did you?
03:27I try to make this short and sweet, kid.
03:45I've been here before many, many times.
03:49And you can ask Paul Heyman how many times he took a talent with a little bit of potential and gassed him up too much too soon only to watch him wilt under those bright, bright lights.
04:04Hell, if I had a dime for every time I stood in this ring across from a talented individual that people not as smart as me gassed up to be generational can't miss blue chip prospect WrestleMania main event waiting to happen.
04:23Well, I'd have a pocket full of dimes.
04:29And speaking of dimes, if you ever mentioned my wife's name again, this goes from business to personal faster than you can run.
04:39And it won't be about the belt anymore because I'm going to rip your eyes out of your head and piss on your single digit IQ brain.
04:46.
05:05January 5, I would tell you to show up alone, I would challenge you to test yourself one on one against the best in the world.
05:15But I know you won't do it.
05:17And it's not because you don't have the balls.
05:20It's because you don't have the heart.
05:22You don't got the belief in yourself it takes to carry this company on your shoulders to wear this gold.
05:30So go ahead, brawny.
05:33Bring Paul Heyman.
05:34Bring the vision.
05:36Bring your mystery masked man.
05:38Bring the National Guard.
05:39Hell, I want you to call up your dumb father and his dumber brother, Scott.
05:44Bring them to Brooklyn.
05:47You're gonna need all hands on deck.
05:49You're gonna need every bit of help you can get to stand a snowball's chance in hell of beating me for this title.
05:57And when I win, when I win, and when you wake up and you look around and you see that Paul Heyman has left you for the next, next big thing, and Bronson Reed is reduced to doing TikToks with the YouTube scammer.
06:15And your mystery man never even showed his face because he's embarrassed to be involved.
06:21Well, the only two people that you're gonna have left is Dumb and Dumber, your dad and his brother.
06:27And in real time, all three of you are gonna find out that even with Steiner math, GTS equals one, two, three.
06:37You lose, I win, and still heavyweight champion of the world, the best in the world, CM Punk.
06:54Well, Braun Breaker said he wanted 2011 CM Punk.
06:59If the featuring spewing out of Punk right there is any indication, it looks like he's gonna get him January the 5th.
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