- 11 hours ago
Amanda Stanton of 'The Bachelor' series talks about her new book, dating as a single mom, and reveals her thoughts on the current 'Bachelor In Paradise' season.
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00:00Hey guys, we're here with the Hollywood Life Podcast and we've got a very special lady
00:06here with us today and you all know her from both The Bachelor and from Bachelor in Paradise.
00:14Welcome Amanda Stanton.
00:16Yay.
00:18Thanks for having me.
00:19Well, thanks for joining Allie Stagnita, my co-anchor here today and of course Nick,
00:26our silent producer and we are all back to work after, well at least I had a vacation.
00:33Yes, we did.
00:33But we kind of had a vacation from the podcast for a week or so, so great to have you back,
00:39Amanda.
00:40And listen, you've got some very exciting news.
00:44Yes.
00:45Yes, you have this very, like it's beautiful looking new book called Now Accepting Roses,
00:53Finding Myself While Searching for the One and Other Lessons I Learned from The Bachelor.
01:00Yes, I'm super excited.
01:02I've been working on it for so long and I feel like the days finally come, so it's really
01:06exciting.
01:07Well, you know, it is really a long process writing a book.
01:11A lot longer than I expected, yes.
01:14It's hard.
01:14It's not easy to write a book and to get them organized and everything and of course you're
01:19very busy because you're a mom of two little girls, you have Kinsley, five, who has just
01:28gone to kindergarten.
01:30Charlie, five.
01:30Oh, Charlie is five.
01:32I've got this all mixed up.
01:33Okay.
01:33Charlie's five and Kinsley is seven.
01:36Yes.
01:36And they've just started school for the year.
01:39And so you've got your hands full with your little girls and with writing a book and we
01:45want to hear everything that you're doing, but tell us like, why exactly did you decide
01:51that you needed to write this book?
01:54So it was something I really wanted to do after I went on the show.
01:57I kind of went from getting married super young, having that not work out.
02:01And you were like what, 21 when you got married?
02:0421, yeah.
02:04Yeah.
02:05I hadn't gone on a date in years.
02:06My first date was on national TV on The Bachelor.
02:10And then after that.
02:10And that was Ben Higgins season.
02:12Yeah.
02:13And then after that, I went on Paradise and I had, you know, got engaged on that show.
02:17And after that.
02:18To Josh Murray.
02:19To Josh.
02:19Yeah.
02:20So after it just kind of seemed like I was, after not dating for so long, then all of a
02:24sudden I was, you know, dating and it was moving super fast because I was on the show
02:28where everything moves so quickly.
02:30So I kind of got what I said in the book was like, it's like a crash course in dating where
02:35I learned so much over a short period of time and kind of felt like not a professional
02:39at dating because I'm not.
02:40And it's funny because I wrote this.
02:41I'm like, I feel like that's why it's so relatable is because I'm definitely not.
02:45I make a lot of mistakes, but I learned from them.
02:48So that's kind of what I talk about in here is just what I've learned from my dating experiences.
02:52When Peter Krause has been here before and he talks about how from going on The Bachelor
02:59or on The Bachelorette in his case, and then to real life dating, it was like the weirdest
03:06thing for him because he was like, the producers are just like kiss, the kiss on the first date.
03:10And so he like went for the kiss and the girl was like, no.
03:14The first date of a regular date.
03:17Right.
03:17And the girl was like, what are you doing?
03:19No.
03:20And so are there things kind of that you've realized when you've reentered the real dating
03:24world that you can't do when it's not on TV?
03:29Okay.
03:29So there's actually, there's actually a part in my book where I talk about that.
03:31And I'm saying like on the show, we talk about our feelings so much and you're on a
03:35first date and you're opening up about like your past relationships and your childhood
03:39trauma and all this stuff.
03:40And it's like, if you're on a real life first date, not on the show, like you'd scare somebody
03:43away.
03:44Right.
03:44But on the show, it's normal.
03:46Right.
03:46That's what you're supposed to do.
03:47So it's definitely different dating on the show than it is in real life.
03:51So it's kind of hyper fast on the show.
03:54Very.
03:55And how in general have your dates been since you've been dating off the show?
04:00Did you have to tell yourself to slow down?
04:04Sometimes.
04:04But I also think after my relationships from the show didn't work out, it was almost
04:08refreshing to go back to like normal time where you could take something slow, but
04:13also you get used to taking things really fast on the show.
04:16So it's like, I mean, on the show, I mean, on Paradise, you get engaged after three weeks.
04:20So in real life, like you maybe have, I mean, I maybe go on one or two dates with somebody
04:25in three weeks, you know?
04:26So it's a lot different.
04:27So you've aged literally in three weeks to Josh?
04:30Yes.
04:31Yeah.
04:32And did you feel, just going back to that, did you feel after three weeks that you were
04:37ready or did you feel pressured because you were on Bachelor in Paradise?
04:41I mean, honestly, at the time I felt ready because you're spending so much time with that
04:46person.
04:46I mean, it's only three weeks, but you're with them 24 seven.
04:48So it's kind of like being on a three week long date.
04:51So you do talk about a lot of things, but you're also, you know, isolated from the rest
04:57of the world.
04:57So that's all you have going on in your mind.
05:01Like I remember when I was on the show, like my dreams would be about The Bachelor, you know,
05:05I was completely isolated from reality.
05:07So at the time, yeah, I was ready.
05:09But after like now looking back, I definitely wasn't ready.
05:12Yeah.
05:12I feel like you're literally on a secluded island with nobody but these however many people.
05:18And also you don't want to get kicked off the show.
05:22And if you kind of don't hook up and have feelings for someone and they have feelings
05:27for you, then the way they set the show up, you could be out.
05:31Yeah.
05:32My first time around with Josh, though, I was like, I mean, I literally thought like I was
05:35going to marry him.
05:36Well, yeah, I did.
05:38I mean, and also Josh Murray was a hot commodity coming on that show originally.
05:43And then he was showed his true colors in a few different ways.
05:49Yeah.
05:49Afterwards.
05:50But Andy had written who had been the bachelorette and had chosen him and then broken up with
05:56him.
05:57She had written about issues that she had.
05:59Were you aware of those issues when you were dating, when you got together with Josh on
06:03Bachelor in Paradise?
06:05So kind of.
06:06So her book came out as we were leaving for Paradise.
06:08So I had never read it.
06:09I knew nothing about it.
06:10I had never met him before because I know now everybody like meets beforehand.
06:14My first time meeting was on the show.
06:16So I didn't know anything.
06:17And then when I was on the show, I don't know if you guys watched that season, but it
06:20was like an issue that came up.
06:21People were like, Andy had said this and that.
06:23Yes.
06:24I remember that.
06:25Yeah.
06:25I had already gone on a couple of dates with him.
06:27I was like really into him.
06:29So and he was telling me, oh, it's not true.
06:32So I gave him the benefit of the doubt.
06:34And I think everybody's been in a situation like that where you really like someone.
06:38So you ignore red flags or you make excuses for them.
06:40I mean, I got so much crap for it.
06:42But I was like, you know what?
06:43Everybody has done that before or a lot of people have.
06:47So, yeah.
06:49Well, that's something that you talk about in your book.
06:52In fact, the whole start of the book really is about red flags because you talk about your
06:59relationship with your first husband.
07:01Well, I guess you only had one husband, so with your ex-husband and about and even in
07:07the prologue, you talk about bad boys, that you're always attracted to bad boys and that
07:12your first husband ended up being a bad boy.
07:15Yes.
07:15And so you kind of start off your book with warning other young women about bad boys and
07:23red flags.
07:25And so do you feel now and then you went into your you'd already had your marriage and then
07:31you went into the Josh relationship with red flags.
07:35Why do you think or do you think that the red flags like when were they really settled in
07:41your mind when you ended your marriage and before you got into the relationship with
07:46Josh or was it not until after Josh that you went, you know what?
07:49I have an issue with these things and they are red flags.
07:53I mean, I saw things in a relationship, which is ultimately why we ended up breaking up.
07:58But I think everything in hindsight is 20-20.
08:00Sometimes when you're in it, like I said, you make excuses or you try to put blame on yourself
08:05or whatever it is.
08:06But definitely like in hindsight, I was like, OK, this was definitely an issue that I probably
08:11should have ended things sooner.
08:12But with Josh.
08:14Yeah.
08:14Or like, you know, with with anyone, I guess.
08:17With your husband, too.
08:17Yeah.
08:18I think, you know, sometimes we drag things on for too long.
08:20We try to make it work.
08:21So I feel like women also just feel like they have to make it work sometimes.
08:28And I also think that, again, women in particular feel like maybe they're too picky or they have
08:35too many, you know, things in their criteria.
08:37So they try to just like bring it down.
08:39And they're like, oh, like the red flag.
08:40Like, that's just me being picky.
08:42And so you try to make it work.
08:43Right.
08:44Exactly.
08:45But then like some things are actually like serious that you need.
08:49Yes.
08:49Yeah.
08:50Totally agree.
08:51Well, I mean, you even confess in your book that before your wedding, like literally pretty
08:58much on the eve of your wedding, you were thinking you should cancel it.
09:02Yeah.
09:03Really?
09:03I knew.
09:04Yeah.
09:04I told my sister, I was like, Carissa, like, I don't think this is going to last.
09:08And she was like, you need to tell mom and dad.
09:10And I was like, we had family that were like flown out.
09:12I was like, no, it's fine.
09:13I'm just going to go through with it.
09:16But yeah.
09:18What would you advise another young woman who is having second thoughts on the eve of her
09:24wedding?
09:25What would you say to her?
09:27So what I've learned from that is that you always think maybe it'll be easier later on.
09:31Like for me, I was like, you know what?
09:33We're already having a wedding.
09:34It's already here.
09:35I can't cancel it now.
09:36It'll be easier just to, you know, get a divorce later if I have to, which sounds so ridiculous.
09:40But I feel like people do think that way.
09:42And I would just say it's not easier to do to wait.
09:46I feel like the sooner you end things, it's going to be easier, even though it's hard in
09:50the moment.
09:51But yeah, I've learned just not to drag things on.
09:54But it's funny because, I mean, obviously, you know, I wrote in my book everything that
09:57I've learned and it's like advice for other girls that are dating.
10:00But at the same time, like, you know, I'm still making mistakes.
10:03I was like, I don't want to act like I'm some professional dater because I'm not.
10:06I feel like that's kind of why it's relatable because I'm not somebody that's been married
10:10for 30 years, like telling single people how how they should be doing it.
10:13It's like kind of like we're all in this together, you know?
10:17What do you feel like is the biggest mistake that young like millennial or, you know, Gen Z
10:22girls are making when it comes to dating?
10:25I mean, I think everyone's different.
10:27But I know like in my mid 20s, I felt so much more rushed to like find somebody and settle
10:32down than I do now, which is weird because I'm 29.
10:35And when I was 24, I feel like I felt super rushed.
10:38But I would just say like you're not on a timeline because I think when you feel like
10:42you're on a timeline is when you're going to settle or when you're going to ignore red
10:45flags or, you know, get into a bad relationship.
10:48So I would just say being on your own timeline and not rushing things.
10:52What kind of qualities now after you've been married once, engaged once and are wiser, what
11:03kind of qualities are you looking for?
11:05And do you advise other young women to look for in a partner?
11:09So I think everybody has, you know, different wants and needs.
11:11And I used to have a list of all these things, like a checklist for everything I was looking
11:14for.
11:14And I don't really have that anymore.
11:16But I think obviously somebody that's kind and respectful, somebody that's supportive.
11:20But I think I need somebody who gives me a little bit of freedom.
11:24So that's really important to me.
11:27But yeah, I mean, I think it's just a little bit.
11:29How about a lot?
11:30A lot of freedom.
11:31Yeah.
11:31I mean, I'm super busy.
11:32So it's like I can't imagine like dating somebody who was controlling now just because
11:37I need a lot of freedom, I guess.
11:38So that's important to me for sure.
11:40And that was an issue with Josh, wasn't it?
11:42Yeah.
11:42That he was controlling.
11:44Yeah.
11:44How was he controlling to you in your like real life when you were living together?
11:48I mean, so I talk about it a lot in my book, but it was just like, you know, we came off
11:53the show engaged and there were just things that I saw like, you know, he didn't really
11:57like me talking to my friends and family or like my friends that used to stop by to come
12:02over and see the kids or whatever.
12:03Sometimes it just became like a big ordeal and he didn't really want them coming over.
12:09He was tired.
12:09It was like always something.
12:10And it just kind of seemed like eventually it made me start to isolate myself from everybody,
12:15you know?
12:16So that's a really dangerous situation.
12:18Yeah.
12:19And it does happen eventually.
12:20It's like that's slow.
12:21That's the beginning of getting isolated.
12:25And then you don't have your own life.
12:27And did that occur in your marriage as well?
12:30Was that an issue?
12:32I mean, my marriage was different.
12:33I feel like he wasn't controlling and didn't try to isolate me, but also he was off kind
12:38of living his own life while I was at home with two kids taking care of him.
12:40So naturally I isolated myself, but it wasn't really like because he wanted me to.
12:46It was more just like I was the one taking.
12:48Yeah, I had to.
12:50Do you think, um, do you think that Josh learned?
12:53Has he changed?
12:54I mean, you said you're still kind of friendly with him.
12:57I mean, okay, so I wrote this book a long time ago and I mean, I'm sure, I'm sure,
13:02I mean, I do believe people can change and I hope that he has, or, you know, I, I've
13:06made mistakes that I've learned from and I'm sure he's learned from it.
13:09So, I mean, I haven't, I don't know him like that anymore, but I hope he has.
13:13I love that you write that you were finding yourself while you're searching for the one
13:18because one of like the best advice I've ever received was that you can't love someone
13:22else until you love yourself.
13:23How did you kind of realize that you needed to do work maybe on yourself before you could
13:29be with someone else?
13:31I mean, I kind of feel like it happened naturally and it was like after my, after my divorce,
13:36I went on the show and then there was another relationship and eventually I was like, okay,
13:39I'm kind of tired of dating.
13:40Like I'm kind of over it.
13:41And I think that's when I really was like, just learned to be really happy on my own and
13:45to be really independent.
13:47And I'm at the point now where I'm like, you know, I'd be fine if I were single forever.
13:51I don't want to be, of course, I want to find somebody, but if I didn't, like I would
13:55be okay.
13:56So I think that's kind of the moral of the book.
13:58It's, you know, dating advice, but also learning to be happy on your own.
14:03Do you have any issue, like problem with guys that have seen you on The Bachelor and The
14:09Bachelor in Paradise and then want to date you?
14:12Like maybe not date you for the right reasons?
14:14Yeah.
14:15So that's like, so everyone assumes it like, oh, after the show, I bet you dating so much
14:19easier.
14:19It's actually so much harder.
14:20And I remember I was on Nick's podcast recently and we were, I forget what he, we were talking
14:24about, but he's like, if you hadn't gone on the show, do you think that you would still
14:28be single?
14:28And I was like, no.
14:30And he was like, same.
14:31It's like, we both think if we never went on the show, we'd probably not be single right
14:35now.
14:35But I think it kind of just adds another aspect that you have to look for.
14:38Like you don't want someone that just wants attention.
14:41Right.
14:41Or wants to be with somebody famous.
14:43Yeah.
14:44I never consider myself famous.
14:45I get what you're saying.
14:46But it's like, yeah, someone just that just wants to be associated.
14:49So yeah, that's another thing to look for, for sure.
14:52There's a lot of people out there that are like that, too.
14:54I bet.
14:54I didn't think it would be like that.
14:55But yeah.
14:56And how do you tell when you're, when you meet someone, someone new or are starting to
15:02date that they really are in it for the right reasons because they like you?
15:09I think.
15:09Like they're genuine about you.
15:10Yeah.
15:11Sometimes it's hard to tell.
15:12Like people are pretty good sometimes at, you know, hiding things.
15:15But I think, I mean, I've gone on a first date before where a guy asked me about The
15:19Bachelor the entire time.
15:20And I was like, okay, I can never go out with this guy again, you know?
15:23Yeah.
15:24But then there's also times where maybe in the beginning they really like you.
15:27But then once they get a taste of the attention, then they start to actually like that.
15:32So it might not be their intention in the beginning.
15:33But then they eventually start to really like it.
15:36And that's happened to me also.
15:39Or there's like that reverse of it that like they get a taste of it and they don't like,
15:44they get nervous that they're dating this like powerful woman, too.
15:48I've found just that.
15:49I mean, I've found.
15:51But like, no, they're like, they just get, you know, like, oh, she has all this success.
15:55And they start to feel like little and guys hate that.
15:59And it makes it hard.
16:00I mean, I feel like just this generation in general, I feel like women are starting to
16:05be a lot more independent.
16:07And I think, yeah, that can be kind of scary to guys, especially when a lot of times in
16:11the past they're used to being like the breadwinner and the man of the house.
16:14And, you know, when you kind of have your own stuff going on, I can see how that can be
16:18a little intimidating.
16:19I feel like guys are becoming bigger assholes, too, though.
16:22Yeah.
16:23It's like they can't be anymore.
16:24I feel like that's why people are waiting so long to get married.
16:26Yes.
16:27A hundred percent.
16:28But I've also, I mean, even this past season of The Bachelor, like I've been saying, like
16:33I was having conversations with my friends about it and they were like, oh, like the
16:36guys just suck.
16:37Like every season, like they're just like more and more come on with girlfriends.
16:40I'm like, that's because guys suck now.
16:43Like every single year, like Trista Sutter season, they worshipped her.
16:47Yeah.
16:47Worshipped her.
16:48The guys were lovely.
16:49Like Tanner, like all of them.
16:52And as the seasons have progressed more and more come on with girlfriends or break up with
16:56girls to go on the show, more and more trying to promote their own products, their own this,
17:01their own that, and they're assholes.
17:03Well, but I also think that the producers have got to do more research on the guys because
17:08this was really bad this season that there was so much, I think, there's so many guys
17:14that were there for their own selfish reasons.
17:18And, you know, the fact that they also got to the very end.
17:25It's so sad.
17:26I mean, that's the dating pool.
17:27That's the, I feel like, okay, so now with Instagram.
17:29No, there's gotta be good guys out there.
17:31Instagram and dating apps, I feel like there's always a way.
17:33Allie, shake your head, no, there aren't.
17:35There's a way for them to be like looking all the time.
17:37So it's like, you're always looking for something better.
17:39There's too many options these days.
17:40It didn't used to be like that when there was no dating apps.
17:42You had to meet somebody in real life.
17:44If now guys are like sliding into girls' DMs and, you know, it's, there's just like
17:49too many options where guys don't want to settle down anymore.
17:51Yeah.
17:51I mean, the same could be for women too.
17:53So, I mean, have you, now that you.
17:56Girls are so much smarter.
17:57We're just smarter.
17:59But when you're dating now, are you finding that there are good guys out there?
18:06Yeah.
18:07I mean, I think there's, there's some, I mean, they're not always easy to find, but there's
18:12good guys out there.
18:13Well, what's the test?
18:15Like, what's the advice that you now give to other women on how to tell if a guy is
18:21a good guy, a genuine good guy?
18:23So, I think not listening to what they say, but more judging them by their actions is huge
18:29because guys can always tell you what you want to hear.
18:32Another thing would just be taking it slow and getting to see things for yourself.
18:36Don't get too excited and kind of, I feel like us girls do that.
18:40We go on one great date and we're like, oh my God, I met my future husband.
18:42Like, you can't do that because then you set your expectations too high and then you get
18:45let down.
18:46So, I would say just like taking things slow and being real.
18:49Don't expect anything.
18:51That's huge.
18:52Now, in terms of any of the Bachelor Nation people, it seems like a lot of you are in
18:59touch.
19:00I mean, like I look on your Instagram and they're all liking your pictures and commenting.
19:06Is there any, but who are you close to still from Bachelor Nation?
19:11So, I'm still close with a lot of them.
19:13I'm really close with Lauren Bush now.
19:17I'm close with Corinne, the twins.
19:19I'm still friends with everybody from the show.
19:21Becca Tilly.
19:23We don't really see each other as much as we used to, but we all still keep in touch.
19:27So.
19:27And what about any of the guys?
19:29Chris Soules is like all over your Instagram.
19:31Is he?
19:32Chris Soules?
19:33He is.
19:33Isn't he in jail?
19:35No, he's not in jail.
19:37No, he's all over your Instagram.
19:39Really?
19:39You haven't noticed?
19:40No.
19:40I don't really check.
19:41I think I don't look at like who likes my stuff.
19:43I don't know if you're talking about Chris Soules.
19:45Yeah, the farmer.
19:46Really?
19:47Yes.
19:48He's not in jail.
19:49I looked at his Instagram too because he was all over yours.
19:51I thought, well, I'm going to check him out.
19:53No, he's all over on his Instagram promoting his farm and Iowa corn season and things.
20:00That's cute.
20:01Interesting.
20:03I think you have an admirer.
20:05Aw.
20:05Oh, she means he's liking, not posting.
20:08Like there's pictures of him.
20:09He's like liking and commenting on your hair.
20:10Liking.
20:11Yeah.
20:11Okay, I got it.
20:11Yeah, he's liking and commenting.
20:13I met Chris before a long time ago, actually.
20:15Yeah.
20:16I think he's carrying a torch.
20:17And you and Andy became friends too.
20:20Yeah.
20:20Andy Dorfman.
20:21So that's fun.
20:23Yeah.
20:23Oh, yeah.
20:23I don't know why I didn't say Andy.
20:24Andy is probably one of my closest friends from The Bachelor right now.
20:28Well, you do have a lot in common.
20:29We have a lot in common.
20:30Yeah.
20:30It's funny though because we like never talk about him.
20:32People are like, oh my God, I want to be a fly on the wall in that room.
20:34I'm like, it's probably not as interesting as you think.
20:37It's a while ago too for her.
20:38Yeah.
20:38It was so long ago.
20:40Like, we've moved on since then.
20:42But yeah, we're really good friends.
20:44Well, so why is it that so many of you do stay friends?
20:49Is it because of that shared experience?
20:52Because only they know what it's like to actually be on Bachelor or Bachelorette or Bachelor in Paradise?
20:57Yeah, I think it's a shared experience that you go through and also you spend so much time with those people.
21:03Like, by the end of the show, the girls on my season were like my sisters basically.
21:06Like, we shared everything.
21:08We experienced a lot of crazy stuff together that nobody else would understand.
21:12So it's like you have this special bond that you don't have with really anyone else.
21:16So it's cool.
21:17Yeah.
21:17Yeah.
21:18Would you ever be The Bachelorette?
21:19Yeah, I get asked this every time and it's like I really have no desire to go back on reality TV, but if they came up to me with a contract, like I wouldn't say no.
21:31Nobody would.
21:31Nobody would.
21:32But I don't, I wouldn't push for it or anything.
21:35Well, you know, and the interesting thing until this season is that the Bachelorette relationships tend to seem to me to have a higher success rate.
21:45And I think probably because they do women are smarter and, you know, more thoughtful about how to find the right guy.
21:57But this, you know, this season, because of all these guys having these secret girlfriends, it really went wrong.
22:04So would you, do you think that if you went on, like you would have a good success?
22:10Like you would find the one with having a pool of at least 25 or 30 guys?
22:15Yeah.
22:17I mean, it'd be hard just because you don't know.
22:19Like Hannah didn't know.
22:20I know.
22:21She really didn't.
22:22She just got unlucky.
22:23Do you know her?
22:24I don't.
22:25I've never met her.
22:25She's super cute though.
22:27Yeah, she's really sweet.
22:29But no, I mean, it's like hard to say.
22:31I mean, I would, I would hope so.
22:32Yeah.
22:33But have you been watching Paradise this season?
22:35Do you watch?
22:36Are you a fan still?
22:37I don't really watch Bachelor and Bachelorette, but I love to watch Paradise.
22:40Okay.
22:41Yeah.
22:41I've watched a couple of the episodes.
22:43What are your thoughts on, did you watch last night?
22:47I didn't.
22:47No, you were traveling.
22:48You were traveling.
22:50Essentially, Derek sends himself home after like his big fight at the crystalline.
22:55The wedding.
22:56Yeah, the wedding.
22:58And people were really bummed out for Derek.
23:01Derek.
23:02Do you know Derek?
23:04Do you know John Paul Jones?
23:05I don't know John Paul.
23:06No, don't know John Paul Jones.
23:07But I know Derek.
23:08And I mean, I think that's the right thing to do.
23:10Yeah.
23:11Especially at that point.
23:11Like it's not week one.
23:13You're kind of getting down to mid end of the season.
23:17And he liked Tayshia, right?
23:19Yeah.
23:19So it's like he didn't like, I think that's a smart thing to do rather than like try to
23:22stick around just to stick around.
23:24Yeah.
23:24Right.
23:24And to potentially break someone else's heart.
23:27Now, what about Robbie Hayes?
23:29Are you in touch with him?
23:30He's another of your exes.
23:31I'm not in touch with Robbie.
23:34I love how everyone just laughs.
23:37Yeah.
23:38What did you learn out of that relationship?
23:41To be fair, like it wasn't, again, I don't even really consider that a relationship.
23:45Like, you know, we just talked about like when you are with someone on the show, like
23:49us girls, like we get so close on the show because we went through the experience together.
23:52That's kind of how I felt with Robbie.
23:53It was more like he was my friend.
23:55Like I never, I never like saw a future with Robbie or thought it was going to be anything
23:59serious that he did like enjoying hanging out with him for a little bit.
24:02And he was also really cool when we were on the season because he was out of his like,
24:07like I know in real life, he's a lot different, but we were, like I said, isolated on an island.
24:10So he didn't have access to the things like clubs and college towns.
24:16So he was cool.
24:18So what are, when you say he was kind of out of his like normal environment, what is his
24:25normal environment?
24:27Clubs and college towns.
24:28That's it?
24:29That really is.
24:30I don't know.
24:30I don't know what he does these days.
24:31It's just like what I, now he's hanging with like some pump rules.
24:35Well, he was also with Lindsay Chrisley, wasn't he?
24:39Oh, that was like that new accusation.
24:41Yeah.
24:41Yeah.
24:42But I mean, whether or not they made a sex tape, they were dating.
24:48Oh gosh.
24:49Yeah.
24:49You got out of that one.
24:51That's a good one.
24:52Good, good, good.
24:52Yeah.
24:53It's good you didn't get into that, into that relationship too much.
24:56Would you want to date someone else in Bachelor Nation?
24:58Yeah.
24:59Is there somebody that's out there that you're still curious about?
25:03No.
25:03I mean, I, I can't think of anybody.
25:07I don't want to say like, I would never.
25:09Nick's one of my good friends.
25:10And that's like, it's funny.
25:11Cause like, it's like this little like crush that I've had for a little, but also he's one
25:15of my good friends and he gives me, he knows everything.
25:17Like I call him when I have relationship problems.
25:20So if I ever dated him, like I wouldn't be able to call him, to call him.
25:23Yeah.
25:24But maybe that's where French, like maybe that's where relationship starts from friendship.
25:28I don't know.
25:29I think we're just good as friends.
25:31Yeah.
25:31Yeah.
25:32Why has he not, he's been the bachelor twice.
25:35Why has he not found the one?
25:39I mean, I think sometimes relationships just don't work and I feel like that's what dating's
25:43kind of about.
25:44Like sometimes it works and sometimes it doesn't, um, but I don't know.
25:47He's probably just, he's probably picky.
25:50He's made it this far.
25:51He's, you know, probably not going to settle with someone that's not right.
25:55So yeah.
25:56Yeah.
25:56Well, I think isn't that, that's really a lot of your advice that's in the book is
26:01that you shouldn't settle for somebody that's not right.
26:04Yeah.
26:05Yeah.
26:06So I think it's worse being in a relationship with somebody that's not right.
26:08You feel lonelier than you do when you're single, even though we make that mistake
26:12a lot.
26:12So yeah.
26:14And finally, your girls, um, when it comes to being a single mom, how do you balance
26:20it all?
26:20And just, you know, writing a book, being a mom to live in your life.
26:26Kids are always number one.
26:28They're always my priority.
26:29Um, but yeah, I mean, I think making time for work, making time to put my phone away
26:34and just spend quality time with my kids is so important.
26:36And then also having just me time is really nice.
26:40So, um, yeah, I mean, I try to balance it, but it's something I still struggle with sometimes.
26:44How much does your ex-husband see the, see the girls?
26:48So he has them every other weekend, but it's like an extended weekend.
26:51So he gets them on Thursday.
26:54So that's usually when I travel, everyone's like, how do you get to do this and that?
26:58And I'd say like 99% of the time when I'm traveling, they're with their dad.
27:02Well, that's good.
27:03This week is actually the longest that I've been away from them since I was on the show.
27:07And they're with my mom and my mom is their favorite person in the world.
27:11And so they like, they don't even care when I'm coming home.
27:13I'm like, it's kind of sad.
27:14I miss you so much.
27:16Um, but yeah, they're, they're happy and they're loved and they're well taken care of.
27:19So yeah.
27:20Good.
27:21And how would, in terms of introducing, like for another young, um, mother who's dating,
27:28how long would you advise before introducing a, um, a new man into their lives?
27:35I don't think there's like a set time with anyone.
27:38It would just be, I guess, whenever you fully trust somebody and feel like they're ready.
27:43Um, because it does add a little bit of pressure once you introduce them, you have like a sense
27:48of like guilt if it doesn't work out.
27:50So yeah, I mean, it just depends on the person, but I would say don't, don't like be ignoring
27:56red flags and introduce them to your kids.
27:59I would wait until you fully trust somebody.
28:01Definitely.
28:02It's good advice.
28:03Well, they haven't had a bachelorette yet who has children.
28:06Have they?
28:07No.
28:07Not a bachelor.
28:08I think they did.
28:09Did they have a bachelor that I?
28:11I don't think so.
28:12Oh, didn't Juan Pablo have kids?
28:14Yeah, I think Juan Pablo.
28:14Oh, he did?
28:15Juan Pablo.
28:17We forget about him.
28:18Yeah.
28:19That was like a non-season.
28:20Yeah.
28:21Even for Chris Harrison.
28:22He doesn't like talking about it.
28:24He's like, never happened.
28:25Yeah.
28:25He's like, I don't really know who that is.
28:28Nope.
28:29Well, that would be a first and be sort of interesting to, um, to have happen.
28:34Well, listen, we wish you all the best and, um, we really hope that you do find the right
28:44one.
28:45Yeah.
28:45One day for you and your girl.
28:47We will, we will keep watching to see if you end up as a bachelorette, whether it's this
28:53season or next.
28:54I think that could be really interesting because we'd love to see you find love.
28:58And so for all of those of you out there that want great dating and relationship advice
29:05and insights into what the bachelor and going on the bachelorette, bachelor in paradise is
29:10like, um, you got to check out and pick up Amanda Stanton's new book, now accepting
29:16roses.
29:18Yay.
29:19Yay.
29:19Thanks for having me.
29:21This was fun.
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