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Short filmTranscript
00:00:00You and your husband are so sweet.
00:00:02You always remember to buy his favorite pizza.
00:00:05Sweet?
00:00:06We haven't gotten busy since Thanksgiving three years ago.
00:00:11Look at them.
00:00:12That's what we call sweet.
00:00:14I wish my hubby was like that.
00:00:17Fuck, that's actually my husband!
00:00:19You jerk, cheating on me behind my back!
00:00:21Aubrey!
00:00:22Let me explain!
00:00:24Wait, wait, wait!
00:00:26Stop!
00:00:27You bastard!
00:00:30Alright, enough!
00:00:32Cut it out!
00:00:33I wouldn't have to be out here messing around if you didn't push me to do it.
00:00:40Look at yourself.
00:00:41Sloppy.
00:00:42You're rude.
00:00:44Totally unfaminate.
00:00:47I want a divorce.
00:00:49Crazy lady.
00:00:57Karma will get that scumbag.
00:01:00No need for karma.
00:01:01I can't handle this myself.
00:01:02Hand me the car key.
00:01:13Chris, Leo snuck the role you wanted.
00:01:16No way.
00:01:17Why him?
00:01:18I cannot understand that.
00:01:20He has fewer Instagram followers than me and his last movie made only a hundred million dollars.
00:01:25The director's looking for a guy who's totally devoted to his wife.
00:01:29Leo and his wife are Hollywood's poster couple for true love.
00:01:33But what about you?
00:01:34You're a forty-year-old bachelor known around town as a total playboy.
00:01:39What if I told everyone that I've actually been in love with one woman for all those years?
00:01:46But she's married and all my wild dating was just to try and forget her.
00:01:50You think that would lend me the role?
00:01:52Just more like excused me.
00:01:54That's not good enough, huh?
00:01:56Alright.
00:01:57Do I have to say she just got divorced and I'm rushing to marry her?
00:02:01Vowing to never look at another supermodel again to prove I can be a committed guy?
00:02:06Now that's a story people might buy into.
00:02:09But the problem is you're just making this up on the spot.
00:02:13Alright.
00:02:14I wish a woman like that would just fall into my life for real.
00:02:23Dammit!
00:02:24Fuck.
00:02:25I'm so sorry.
00:02:32Are you nuts?
00:02:33Nuts?
00:02:37Is that all your men got?
00:02:38Yeah, I'm nuts.
00:02:39But you guys eat don't cook by nuts.
00:02:41Sleep with nuts.
00:02:42Have kids with nuts.
00:02:44You are the real nuts here.
00:02:45No offense.
00:02:46But I'm Chris Roberts.
00:02:48I only sleep with supermodels under 25 years old.
00:02:54Only supermodels!
00:02:58Screw you, fuck Chris Roberts!
00:03:09Shit!
00:03:15I sold the house.
00:03:18You've got till tonight to move out.
00:03:20Or your stuff will be thrown away.
00:03:24If you want to divorce me, fine!
00:03:27Go ahead!
00:03:28But how dare you sell our house without my consent!
00:03:33I'll sue you!
00:03:34Think you can afford a lawyer?
00:03:36Don't mess with me.
00:03:38I'll apply for the custody for our son.
00:03:40A jobless housewife like you won't stand a chance.
00:03:43Despicable!
00:03:44So, you divorced?
00:03:47It's none of your business!
00:03:49Marry me!
00:03:57Are you insane?
00:04:01My car's worth 4 million dollars.
00:04:04You want to talk about marriage?
00:04:06Or compensation?
00:04:09This win, ma'am.
00:04:14Watch your step, ma'am.
00:04:15Welcome, ma'am.
00:04:22Welcome, ma'am.
00:04:23Welcome, ma'am.
00:04:24Welcome, ma'am!
00:04:25Welcome, ma'am.
00:04:26Welcome, ma'am.
00:04:29Bye.
00:04:30Wow.
00:04:31So, it's your house at 5 Central Avenue.
00:04:33I've seen it in a magazine!
00:04:34Wow.
00:04:35So, it's your house at 5 Central Avenue.
00:04:36I've seen it in a magazine!
00:04:38in the magazine so I get a room like this for fake marriage no this is for
00:04:57Elizabeth my dog yours is upstairs bigger and better forget that come sign
00:05:03the contract sign this and you will be my wife sorry what's your name again Aubrey okay
00:05:13Aubrey listen to me I love you for more than 10 years I heard that you're divorced so I pop the
00:05:23question right away what really are you kidding me Aubrey this marriage is just for show I hope
00:05:31it won't catch real feelings for me relax not falling for you as easy as drinking and eating
00:05:38great that's amazing once I secure the role and back that Oscar we'll part our ways smoothly
00:05:46so we stuck together until we win an Oscar might as well say so that do us a part don't worry about
00:05:55that I'm gonna pay you an acting salary the same as I do with my models and actors no Chris Roberts
00:06:02those actresses must earn a fortune considering our attitude I'm gonna go with minimum wage usually
00:06:09I think they pay around 500 grand and now 150k that's enough for you per year per month of course
00:06:18so you have a son don't get me wrong just want to know more about my wife
00:06:39yeah his name is Luke he's nine in summer camp I'm aware of the divorce
00:06:49good lord that looks calorie packed
00:07:01first it's not for you second I hate when people reduce food to calories
00:07:07geez touchy it'll make my loving you seem even more dramatic keep that up another thing clear
00:07:16your schedule for tomorrow for meeting the director already this is your first time stepping out as my
00:07:23wife and I really want you to take it seriously need to dress up nicely all right because it's gonna
00:07:29be the first time that you're gonna act as my wife come on this top I'm wearing is like from the supermarket
00:07:35I'll solve this problem right now hey Brad didn't you say you could transform any woman
00:07:43oh my god I didn't expect this to be such a huge project but luckily I'm a Hollywood stylish all right girls let's get going
00:07:56are these ladies fashion pieces worth the expense for
00:08:26her she's my wife now so yes it's worth it baby well I did my best today remember Rome wasn't built in the day
00:08:38how do I look wow you're the most beautiful you have ever seen
00:08:58wow you sure ensure that us why aren't you closing the Victoria's Secret show this year
00:09:06Julia your acting skills surpassed mine
00:09:10that's what handling a big story does to me
00:09:13let's go girls thank you so much guys
00:09:16no problem baby
00:09:18geez how did I not realize my backside has such potential
00:09:23just like kardashians guess you regret this fake marriage now huh
00:09:29god is fair though he didn't bless you with a fury physique
00:09:34he gave you unbrittle confidence
00:09:36wow you're totally gonna nail that role now
00:09:43we look so perfect together
00:09:44no no no no there's no spark between you two
00:10:01you don't love your wife at all
00:10:03I'm sorry that I can't give you this role
00:10:05but we haven't even started talking
00:10:07you know the law talk is about feeling
00:10:10I don't feel your love for her
00:10:13he's crazy about me
00:10:15the moment I was divorced he swooped in with a helicopter proposal
00:10:21I love you baby
00:10:23that's because I just can't wait to spend the rest of my life with you
00:10:26come back to me
00:10:31or you'll learn to be a proper
00:10:35jeez
00:10:36are you sure he's top hollywood's director and not some charlatan
00:10:41yes but he did catch you rolling your eyes at me
00:10:44maybe it's only because you ordered a cup of water any steak
00:10:47perhaps that's to avoid your dress zipper bursting from one extra bite
00:10:52you guessed right
00:10:56oh much better now
00:11:10can you eat quieter you're disturbing my reading
00:11:22you're married what's up
00:11:24what your daughter's in the hospital with a fever
00:11:27yeah of course I can cover your shift today
00:11:31where are you going
00:11:32the contract doesn't require me to report my personal itinerary to you
00:11:43Aubrey what are you doing here
00:11:46you're not stalking me are you
00:11:48listen stop harassing me
00:11:50Tiffany and I are engaged
00:11:54sorry to disappoint you but I'm married too
00:11:57it's not just you who found someone new
00:11:59Jim
00:11:59I told you she put up a front about finding someone else
00:12:06I do have a husband and he's hotter
00:12:09wealthier and last longer in bed than you ever did
00:12:12if he's so great
00:12:13when's an old timer like you still going here serving tapes
00:12:18come on man don't just stand there serve us
00:12:20I want hot tea
00:12:25jeez
00:12:35you trying to scald me
00:12:36Are you satisfied now?
00:12:48That's better.
00:12:49Drink up, dear.
00:12:51Ouch!
00:12:53This huge diamond ring makes it hard to lift my hand.
00:12:57Check out my engagement ring from Mark.
00:13:00It's whopping two carrots.
00:13:02I heard your wedding ring was...
00:13:05A freebie that came with some furniture shopping, wasn't it?
00:13:11Wow, good for you.
00:13:14And when you guys eventually split, you will get a nice chunk of change from selling this treasure.
00:13:22Don't stoop to our level.
00:13:24You, go and get the steaks ready in ten minutes, else I'll be reporting you.
00:13:29I said half an hour when you ordered.
00:13:32Then figured it out.
00:13:34Wait!
00:13:37Tub off my water.
00:13:44Mary, you owe me a proper meal.
00:13:46I'll refrain from stabbing those two for your job's sake.
00:13:52Aubrey?
00:13:53Why are you waitressing?
00:13:55We're not really married.
00:13:56What I do is none of your business.
00:13:57Let's go.
00:14:01The advertisers are waiting.
00:14:05Keep an eye on her.
00:14:07Make sure nobody messes with her.
00:14:09I'm not her agent.
00:14:10But she's my wife.
00:14:11At least on paper.
00:14:12Okay guys, if you don't need anything else, I'm gonna head out and change this.
00:14:17Oh my god!
00:14:19My ring!
00:14:20It's gone!
00:14:22Since you're the only one serving us, I suspect you stole my ring.
00:14:26Just because you're a bitch doesn't mean everyone is.
00:14:29I wouldn't even want to touch the stuff you've worn, let alone steal it.
00:14:33Denying won't help.
00:14:36It's only you somewhere.
00:14:40See?
00:14:41This is proof.
00:14:42I'm gonna have you fired!
00:14:49No way!
00:14:50You're framing me on purpose!
00:14:57Got it.
00:14:58Get the restaurant owner over here for me.
00:15:03You and your husband are so sweet.
00:15:05You always remember to buy his favorite pizza.
00:15:08Sweet?
00:15:08We haven't gotten busy since Thanksgiving three years ago.
00:15:14Look at them.
00:15:15That's what we call sweet.
00:15:17I wish my hubby was like that.
00:15:20That's actually my husband!
00:15:22You jerk cheating on me behind my back!
00:15:24Aubrey!
00:15:25Let me explain!
00:15:27Wait, wait, wait!
00:15:29Get here!
00:15:29Stop!
00:15:32All right, enough!
00:15:35Cut it out!
00:15:36I wouldn't have to be out here messing around if you didn't push me to do it.
00:15:44Look at yourself.
00:15:45Sloppy.
00:15:46You're rude.
00:15:47Totally unfaminate.
00:15:50I want a divorce.
00:15:52Crazy lady.
00:15:53No need for karma.
00:16:04I can't handle this myself.
00:16:05Hand me the car key.
00:16:16Chris.
00:16:17Leo snuck the rule you wanted.
00:16:19No way.
00:16:21Why him?
00:16:21I cannot understand that.
00:16:23He has fewer Instagram followers than me, and his last movie made only $100 million.
00:16:28The director's looking for a guy who's totally devoted to his wife.
00:16:32Leo and his wife are Hollywood's poster couple for true love.
00:16:36But what about you?
00:16:37You're a 40-year-old bachelor known around town as a total playboy.
00:16:42What if I told everyone that I've actually been in love with one woman for all those years,
00:16:49but she's married, and all my wild dating was just to try and forget her.
00:16:53You think that would lend me the role?
00:16:54Sounds more like excused me.
00:16:57That's not good enough, huh?
00:16:59All right.
00:17:00Do I have to say she just got divorced and I'm rushing to marry her,
00:17:04vowing to never look at another supermodel again to prove I can be a committed guy?
00:17:09Now that's a story people might buy into.
00:17:12But the problem is, you're just making this up on the spot.
00:17:16All right.
00:17:19I wish a woman like that would just fall into my life for real.
00:17:22I'm so sorry.
00:17:35Are you nuts?
00:17:36Nuts?
00:17:40Is that all your men got?
00:17:41Yeah, I'm nuts.
00:17:43But you guys eat good cooked by nuts.
00:17:45Sleep with nuts.
00:17:46Have kids with nuts.
00:17:47You are the real nuts here.
00:17:49No offense.
00:17:50But I'm Chris Roberts.
00:17:51I only sleep with supermodels under 25 years old.
00:17:57Only supermodels.
00:18:01Screw you, Chris Roberts!
00:18:12Shit!
00:18:20I sold the house.
00:18:21You've got till tonight to move out.
00:18:23Or your stuff will be thrown away.
00:18:28If you want to divorce me, fine!
00:18:30Go ahead!
00:18:31But how dare you sell our house without my consent!
00:18:36I'll sue you!
00:18:37Think you can afford a lawyer?
00:18:39Don't mess with me.
00:18:41Or apply for a custody for our staff.
00:18:43A jobless housewife like you won't stand a chance.
00:18:47Despicable!
00:18:47So, you're divorced?
00:18:48So, you're divorced?
00:18:50It's none of your business!
00:18:52Marry me!
00:19:00Are you insane?
00:19:04My car's worth 4 million dollars.
00:19:07You want to talk about marriage?
00:19:09Or compensation?
00:19:10This way, ma'am.
00:19:17Watch your step, ma'am.
00:19:25Welcome, ma'am.
00:19:26I need to let the house.
00:19:28I need to help you!
00:19:37I need to take the house.
00:19:39Wow.
00:19:39So, it's your house at 5 Central Avenue.
00:19:40I've seen it in a magazine.
00:19:55So, I get a room like this for a fake marriage?
00:19:59No.
00:20:00This is for Elizabeth, my dog.
00:20:02Yours is upstairs.
00:20:04Bigger and better.
00:20:05Forget that.
00:20:06Come sign the contract.
00:20:10Sign this, and you will be my wife.
00:20:14Sorry, what's your name again?
00:20:15Aubrey.
00:20:16Okay.
00:20:17Aubrey, listen to me.
00:20:19I love you for more than 10 years.
00:20:22I heard that you're divorced.
00:20:25So, I popped the question right away.
00:20:28What? Really?
00:20:30Are you kidding me?
00:20:32Aubrey, this marriage is just for show.
00:20:34I hope you won't catch real feelings for me.
00:20:38Relax.
00:20:39It's not falling for you as easy as drinking and eating.
00:20:42Great.
00:20:42That's amazing.
00:20:44Once I secure the role and back that Oscar, we'll part our ways smoothly.
00:20:51So, we stuck together until we win an Oscar?
00:20:55Might as well say, till that do us a part.
00:20:58Don't worry about that.
00:21:00I'm going to pay you an acting salary.
00:21:02The same as I do with my models and actors.
00:21:05You're Chris Roberts.
00:21:06Those actresses must earn a fortune.
00:21:09Considering our attitude, I'm going to go with minimum wage.
00:21:12Usually, they pay around 500 grand.
00:21:14And now, 150K.
00:21:16That's enough for you.
00:21:19Per year?
00:21:20Per month, of course.
00:21:21Per month, of course.
00:21:25Per month, of course.
00:21:34So you have a son?
00:21:36Don't get me wrong.
00:21:37Just want to know more about my wife.
00:21:45Yeah.
00:21:46His name is Luke.
00:21:48He's nine.
00:21:48In summer camp, I'm aware of the divorce.
00:22:01Good lord, that looks calorie packed.
00:22:05First, it's not for you.
00:22:07Second, I hate when people reduce food to calories.
00:22:11Jeez, touchy.
00:22:13It'll make my loving you seem even more dramatic.
00:22:17Keep that up.
00:22:18Another thing, clear your schedule for tomorrow for meeting the director.
00:22:23Already?
00:22:25This is your first time stepping out as my wife and I really want you to take it seriously.
00:22:29You need to dress up nicely, alright?
00:22:31Because it's gonna be the first time that you're gonna act as my wife.
00:22:35Come on, this top I'm wearing is like from the supermarket.
00:22:39I'll solve this problem right now.
00:22:42Hey, Brad.
00:22:44Didn't you say you could transform any woman?
00:22:47Oh my god.
00:22:50I didn't expect this to be such a huge project.
00:22:54But luckily, I'm a Hollywood-stylish.
00:22:57Alright girls, let's get going.
00:23:00Hmm, right here.
00:23:02I got it.
00:23:11Are you okay, baby?
00:23:14Watch out, please calm down.
00:23:15Can't you set up back here?
00:23:16Sit down.
00:23:17Get him back here.
00:23:18Oh my god.
00:23:19Are you okay, baby?
00:23:26Are these ladies' fashion pieces worth the expense for her?
00:23:30She's my wife now.
00:23:32So yes, it's worth it.
00:23:33How do I look?
00:23:54Wow, you're the most beautiful you have ever seen.
00:24:04Wow, you sure ain't sure of that ass.
00:24:07Why aren't you closing the Victoria's Secret show this year?
00:24:09Julia, her acting skill surpassed mine.
00:24:14That's what handling a big star does to me.
00:24:17Let's go, girls.
00:24:18Thank you so much, guys.
00:24:20No problem, baby.
00:24:23Jeez, how did I not realize my backside has such potential?
00:24:26Just like Kardashians.
00:24:29Guess you regret this fake marriage now, huh?
00:24:33God is fair.
00:24:35Though he didn't bless you with a fury physique,
00:24:37he gave you unbridled confidence.
00:24:44Wow, you're totally gonna nail that role now.
00:24:46We look so perfect together.
00:24:48It's a match made in heaven.
00:24:56No, no, no.
00:25:02There's no spark between you two.
00:25:05You don't love your wife at all.
00:25:07I'm sorry that I can't give you this role.
00:25:09But we haven't even started talking.
00:25:11You know the law talk is about feeling.
00:25:13I don't feel your love for her.
00:25:17He's crazy about me.
00:25:18The moment I was divorced,
00:25:20he swooped in with a helicopter proposal.
00:25:24I love you, baby.
00:25:25That's because I just can't wait
00:25:27to spend the rest of my life with you.
00:25:34Come back to me.
00:25:35You'll learn to be a proper...
00:25:37Jeez.
00:25:40Are you sure he's top Hollywood's director
00:25:42and not some charlatan?
00:25:44Yes, but he did catch you rolling your eyes at me.
00:25:47Maybe it's only because you ordered a cup of water
00:25:49and a steak?
00:25:50Perhaps that's to avoid your dress zipper
00:25:52bursting from one extra bite.
00:25:54Oh, you guessed right.
00:26:00Much better now.
00:26:14Can you eat quieter?
00:26:16You're disturbing my reading.
00:26:17You're married?
00:26:27What's up?
00:26:28What?
00:26:28Your daughter's in the hospital with a fever?
00:26:30Yeah, of course.
00:26:31I can cover your shift today.
00:26:34Where are you going?
00:26:35The contract doesn't require me
00:26:37to report my personal itinerary to you.
00:26:39Aubrey, what are you doing here?
00:26:49You're not stalking me, are you?
00:26:51Listen, stop harassing me.
00:26:53Tiffany and I are engaged.
00:26:57Sorry to disappoint you,
00:26:58but I'm married too.
00:27:00It's not just you who found someone new.
00:27:02Jim!
00:27:03I told you she put up a friend
00:27:05about finding someone else.
00:27:09I do have a husband,
00:27:11and he's hotter,
00:27:12wealthier,
00:27:13and lasts longer in bed
00:27:14than you ever did.
00:27:16If he's so great,
00:27:17when's an old-timer like you
00:27:19still going here serving tapes?
00:27:21Come on, man.
00:27:22Don't just stand there.
00:27:23Serve us.
00:27:24I want hot tea.
00:27:27Jeez.
00:27:38You trying to scald me?
00:27:49Are you satisfied now?
00:27:51That's better.
00:27:53Drink up, dear.
00:27:55Ouch!
00:27:55This huge diamond ring
00:27:58makes it hard to lift my hand.
00:28:01Check out my engagement ring from Mark.
00:28:03It's whopping two carats.
00:28:06I heard your wedding ring was...
00:28:08a freebie that came with
00:28:12some furniture shopping,
00:28:13wasn't it?
00:28:15Wow, good for you.
00:28:17And when you guys eventually split,
00:28:19you will get a nice chunk of change
00:28:22from selling this treasure.
00:28:25Don't stoop their level.
00:28:28You,
00:28:28go and get the steaks ready
00:28:30in ten minutes,
00:28:31else I'll be reporting you.
00:28:32I said
00:28:33half an hour
00:28:35when you ordered.
00:28:36Then
00:28:36figured it out.
00:28:38Wait.
00:28:40Top of my water.
00:28:41Mary,
00:28:47Mary,
00:28:48you owe me a proper meal.
00:28:50I refrain from stabbing those two
00:28:51for your job's sake.
00:28:56Aubrey?
00:28:57Why are you waitressing?
00:28:58We're not really married.
00:28:59What I do is none of your business.
00:29:04Let's go.
00:29:05The advertisers are waiting.
00:29:06Keep an eye on her.
00:29:10Make sure nobody messes with her.
00:29:12I'm not her agent.
00:29:13But she's my wife,
00:29:14at least on paper.
00:29:15Okay guys,
00:29:16if you don't need anything else,
00:29:18I'm gonna head out and change shifts.
00:29:20Oh my god!
00:29:22My ring!
00:29:23It's gone!
00:29:25Since you're the only one serving us,
00:29:27I suspect you stole my ring.
00:29:29Just because you're a bitch
00:29:30doesn't mean everyone is.
00:29:32I wouldn't even want to touch
00:29:34the stuff you've worn,
00:29:35let alone steal it.
00:29:37Denial won't help.
00:29:39It's on you somewhere.
00:29:43See?
00:29:45This is proof.
00:29:49I'm gonna have you
00:29:51fired!
00:29:52No way!
00:29:53You're framing me on purpose!
00:29:54Got it.
00:30:01Get the restaurant owner
00:30:02over here for me.
00:30:06You and your husband
00:30:07are so sweet.
00:30:08You always remember
00:30:09to buy his favorite pizza.
00:30:11Sweet?
00:30:12We haven't gotten busy
00:30:14since Thanksgiving
00:30:15three years ago.
00:30:17Look at them.
00:30:19That's what we call sweet.
00:30:20I wish my hubby was like that.
00:30:21Fuck, that's actually my husband.
00:30:25You jerk cheating on me
00:30:26behind my back!
00:30:27Aubrey,
00:30:28let me explain.
00:30:30Wait, wait, wait.
00:30:32Quick, stop!
00:30:35Bust it!
00:30:36Alright, enough!
00:30:38Cut it out!
00:30:40I wouldn't have to be out here
00:30:42lasting around
00:30:43if you didn't push me
00:30:45to do it.
00:30:47Look at yourself.
00:30:48Sloppy.
00:30:49You're rude.
00:30:50totally
00:30:52unfeminine.
00:30:54I want a divorce.
00:30:56Crazy lady.
00:31:05Get that scumbag!
00:31:06No need for karma.
00:31:07I can't handle this myself.
00:31:09Hand me the car key.
00:31:09Chris,
00:31:20Leo's not the rule you wanted.
00:31:22No way.
00:31:23I can't understand that.
00:31:26He has fewer Instagram followers than me
00:31:29and his last movie
00:31:30made only a hundred million dollars.
00:31:31The director's looking for a guy
00:31:33who's totally devoted to his wife.
00:31:35Leo and his wife are Hollywood's poster couple for true love.
00:31:39But what about you?
00:31:41You're a 40-year-old bachelor, known around town as a total playboy.
00:31:45What if I told everyone that I've actually been in love with one woman for all those years?
00:31:52But she's married, and all my wild dating was just to try and forget her.
00:31:56You think that would lend me the role?
00:31:58Sounds more like excused me.
00:32:00That's not good enough, huh?
00:32:02All right, do I have to say she just got divorced and I'm rushing to marry her,
00:32:07vowing to never look at another supermodel again to prove I can be a committed guy?
00:32:12Now that's a story people might buy into.
00:32:16But the problem is, you're just making this up on the spot.
00:32:19All right.
00:32:22I wish a woman like that would just fall into my life for real.
00:32:29Damn it!
00:32:31Fuck.
00:32:32I'm so sorry.
00:32:38Are you nuts?
00:32:40Nuts?
00:32:43Is that all your men got?
00:32:45Yeah, I'm nuts.
00:32:46But you guys eat your coke by nuts.
00:32:48Sleep with nuts.
00:32:49Have kids with nuts.
00:32:50You are the real nuts here.
00:32:52No offense.
00:32:53But I'm Chris Roberts.
00:32:54I only sleep with supermodels under 25 years old.
00:32:58Only supermodels.
00:33:00Only supermodels.
00:33:02Screw you, fuck Chris Roberts!
00:33:06I sold the house.
00:33:11I sold the house.
00:33:24You got till tonight to move out.
00:33:27Or your stuff will be thrown away.
00:33:29If you want to divorce me, fight!
00:33:33Go ahead!
00:33:35But how dare you sell our house without my consent!
00:33:40I'll sue you!
00:33:41Think you can afford a lawyer?
00:33:43Don't mess with me.
00:33:44Or apply for a custody for a son.
00:33:46A jobless house without you won't stand a chance.
00:33:50It's a pickleball!
00:33:51So, you divorced?
00:33:53It's none of your business!
00:33:56Marry me!
00:33:56Are you insane?
00:34:07My car's worth $4 million.
00:34:10You want to talk about marriage?
00:34:12Or compensation?
00:34:15This way, Mom.
00:34:20Watch us that, Mom.
00:34:22Welcome, Mom.
00:34:39Wow.
00:34:40So, it's your house at 5 Central Avenue.
00:34:43I've seen it in a magazine.
00:34:45So, I get a room like this for a fake marriage?
00:35:03No.
00:35:04This is for Elizabeth, my dog.
00:35:06Yours is upstairs.
00:35:07Bigger and better.
00:35:09Forget that.
00:35:10Come sign the contract.
00:35:11Sign this, and you will be my wife.
00:35:17Sorry, what's your name again?
00:35:19Aubrey.
00:35:19Okay.
00:35:20Aubrey, listen to me.
00:35:23I love you for more than 10 years.
00:35:25I heard that you're divorced.
00:35:28So, I popped the question right away.
00:35:32What?
00:35:32Really?
00:35:33Are you kidding me?
00:35:35Aubrey, this marriage is just for show.
00:35:37I hope you won't catch real feelings for me.
00:35:40Relax.
00:35:42Not falling for you as easy as drinking and eating.
00:35:45Great.
00:35:46That's amazing.
00:35:47Once I secure the role and back that Oscar, we'll part our ways smoothly.
00:35:54So, we stuck together until we win an Oscar?
00:35:58Might as well say, so that do us a part.
00:36:01Don't worry about that.
00:36:03I'm going to pay you an acting salary.
00:36:05The same as I do with my models and actors.
00:36:08You're Chris Roberts.
00:36:09Those actresses must earn a fortune.
00:36:12Considering our attitude, I'm going to go with minimum wage.
00:36:15Usually, they pay around 500 grand.
00:36:18And now, 150K.
00:36:20That's enough for you.
00:36:22Per year?
00:36:23Per month, of course.
00:36:24So, you have a son?
00:36:39Don't get me wrong.
00:36:41Just want to know more about my wife.
00:36:43Per month, of course.
00:36:43I was going to go with my wife.
00:36:48Yeah.
00:36:49His name is Luke.
00:36:51He's 9.
00:36:52In summer camp, unaware of the divorce.
00:36:55Good lord, that looks calorie packed
00:37:08First, it's not for you
00:37:10Second, I hate when people reduce food to calories
00:37:13Jeez, touchy
00:37:16It'll make my loving you seem even more dramatic
00:37:19Keep that up
00:37:21Another thing, clear your schedule for tomorrow
00:37:24For meeting the director
00:37:25Already?
00:37:28This is your first time stepping out as my wife
00:37:30And I really want you to take it seriously
00:37:32Need to dress up nicely, alright?
00:37:35Because it's gonna be the first time that you're gonna act as my wife
00:37:38Come on, this top I'm wearing is like from the supermarket
00:37:41I'll solve this problem right now
00:37:44Hey Brad
00:37:46Didn't you say you could transform any woman?
00:37:51Oh my god
00:37:54I didn't expect this to be such a huge project
00:37:57But luckily, I'm Hollywood stylish
00:38:00Alright girls
00:38:01Let's get going
00:38:03Right here
00:38:05I got it
00:38:06Are you okay baby?
00:38:16Watch out
00:38:17Please calm down
00:38:18Can we sit up back here?
00:38:19Sit down
00:38:20Get them out of here
00:38:21Oh my god
00:38:22Are you okay baby?
00:38:23Are these ladies' fashion pieces worth the expense for her?
00:38:34She's my wife now
00:38:35So yes, it's worth it
00:38:37Baby Ro
00:38:40Well, I did my best today
00:38:41Remember
00:38:42Rome wasn't built in a day
00:38:44How do I look?
00:39:01Wow
00:39:01You're the most beautiful you have ever seen
00:39:04Wow
00:39:06You sure ain't sure of that ass
00:39:09Why aren't you closing the Victoria's Secret show this year?
00:39:14Julia
00:39:14Your acting skills surpassed mine
00:39:17That's what handling a big story does to me
00:39:20Let's go girls
00:39:21Thank you so much guys
00:39:23No problem baby
00:39:24Geez
00:39:26How did I not realize my backside has such potential?
00:39:31Just like Kardashians
00:39:32Guess you regret this fake marriage now huh?
00:39:36God is fair
00:39:37Though he didn't bless you with a fury physique
00:39:40He gave you unbridled confidence
00:39:42Wow
00:39:47You're totally gonna nail that role now
00:39:49We look so perfect together
00:39:51It's a match made in heaven
00:39:53No, no, no
00:40:05There's no spark between you two
00:40:08You don't love your wife at all
00:40:10I'm sorry that I can't give you this role
00:40:12But we haven't even started talking
00:40:14You know the law talk is about feeling
00:40:16I don't feel your love for her
00:40:19He's crazy about me
00:40:22The moment I was divorced
00:40:23He swooped in with a helicopter proposal
00:40:26I love you baby
00:40:29That's because I just can't wait to spend the rest of my life with you
00:40:32Come back to me
00:40:38We will learn to be a proper
00:40:39Geez
00:40:43Are you sure he's top Hollywood's director
00:40:46And not some charlatan?
00:40:47Yes
00:40:48But he did catch you rolling your eyes at me
00:40:50Maybe it's only because you ordered a cup of water
00:40:52Any steak?
00:40:53Perhaps that's to avoid your dress zipper
00:40:55Bursting from one extra bite
00:40:58You guessed right
00:40:59Much better now
00:41:08Can you eat quieter?
00:41:19You're disturbing my reading
00:41:20You're married?
00:41:30What's up?
00:41:31What?
00:41:32Your daughter's in the hospital with a fever?
00:41:33Of course
00:41:34I can cover your shift today
00:41:35Where are you going?
00:41:39The contract doesn't require me to report my personal itinerary to you
00:41:43Aubrey
00:41:50What are you doing here?
00:41:52You're not stalking me, are you?
00:41:54Listen
00:41:55Stop harassing me
00:41:56Tiffany and I are engaged
00:41:58Sorry to disappoint you
00:42:02But I'm married too
00:42:03It's not just you who found someone new
00:42:05Jim
00:42:06I told you she put up a front about finding someone else
00:42:10I do have a husband
00:42:14And he's hotter
00:42:15Wealthier
00:42:16And lasts longer in bed than you ever did
00:42:18If he's so great
00:42:20When's an old timer like you still going here serving tapes?
00:42:24Come on man
00:42:25Don't just stand there
00:42:26Serve us
00:42:27I want hot tea
00:42:31Jeez
00:42:40You trying to scald me?
00:42:53Are you satisfied now?
00:42:54That's better
00:42:55Drink up dear
00:42:57Ouch
00:42:59This huge diamond ring makes it hard to lift my hand
00:43:03Check out my engagement ring from Mark
00:43:06It's whopping two carats
00:43:08I heard your wedding ring was
00:43:11A freebie that came with some furniture shopping
00:43:16Wasn't it?
00:43:17Wow
00:43:18Good for you
00:43:20And when you guys eventually split
00:43:22You will get a nice chunk of change from selling this treasure
00:43:27Don't stoop their level
00:43:30You
00:43:31Go and get the stakes ready in ten minutes
00:43:34Else
00:43:34I'll be reporting you
00:43:35I said
00:43:36Half an hour
00:43:38When you ordered
00:43:39Then
00:43:39Figured it out
00:43:40Wait
00:43:42Pop off my water
00:43:44Mary
00:43:50Mary
00:43:51You owe me a proper meal
00:43:52I refrain from stabbing those two for your job's sake
00:43:56Aubrey?
00:44:00Why are you waitressing?
00:44:01We're not really married
00:44:02What I do is none of your business
00:44:04Let's go
00:44:08The advertisers are waiting
00:44:09Keep an eye on her
00:44:13Make sure nobody messes with her
00:44:15I'm not her agent
00:44:16But she's my wife
00:44:17At least on paper
00:44:18Okay guys
00:44:19If you don't need anything else
00:44:21I'm gonna head out and change shifts
00:44:23Oh my god
00:44:25My ring
00:44:26It's gone
00:44:27Since you're the only one serving us
00:44:30I suspect you stole my ring
00:44:32Just because you're a bitch
00:44:34Doesn't mean everyone is
00:44:35I wouldn't even want to touch the stuff you've worn
00:44:38Let alone steal it
00:44:39Denying won't help
00:44:41Let's own you somewhere
00:44:44See?
00:44:48This is proof
00:44:49I'm gonna have you
00:44:54FIRED
00:44:55No way
00:44:56You're framing me on purpose
00:44:58Got it
00:45:04Get the restaurant owner over here for me
00:45:06You and your husband are so sweet
00:45:11You always remember to buy his favorite pizza
00:45:14Sweet?
00:45:15We haven't gotten busy since Thanksgiving three years ago
00:45:20Look at them
00:45:22That's what we call sweet
00:45:23I wish my hubby was like that
00:45:25That's actually my husband
00:45:28You jerk cheating on me behind my back
00:45:30Aubrey
00:45:31Let me explain
00:45:33Wait
00:45:34Wait
00:45:34Stop
00:45:36All right
00:45:40Enough
00:45:41Cut it out
00:45:42I
00:45:44Wouldn't have to be out here
00:45:45Lasting around
00:45:47If you
00:45:47Didn't push me
00:45:49To do it
00:45:50Look at yourself
00:45:51Sloppy
00:45:52You're rude
00:45:53Totally
00:45:55All feminine
00:45:56I want a divorce
00:45:58Crazy lady
00:46:00Get that scumbag
00:46:10No need for karma
00:46:10I can't handle this myself
00:46:11Hand me the car key
00:46:13Chris
00:46:23Leo snucked the role you wanted
00:46:25No way
00:46:26Why him?
00:46:28I cannot understand that
00:46:30He has fewer Instagram followers than me
00:46:32And his last movie made only $100 million
00:46:34The director is looking for a guy
00:46:36Who is totally devoted to his wife
00:46:38Leo and his wife are Hollywood's poster couple
00:46:41For true love
00:46:42But what about you?
00:46:44You're a 40-year-old bachelor, known around town as a total playboy.
00:46:49What if I told everyone that I've actually been in love with one woman for all those years,
00:46:55but she's married, and all my wild dating was just to try and forget her?
00:47:00You think that would lend me the role?
00:47:01Sounds more like the excuse to me.
00:47:04That's not good enough, huh?
00:47:06Alright, do I have to say she just got divorced and I'm rushing to marry her,
00:47:10vowing to never look at another supermodel again to prove I can be a committed guy?
00:47:15Now that's a story people might buy into.
00:47:19But the problem is, you're just making this up on the spot.
00:47:23Alright.
00:47:26I wish a woman like that would just fall into my life for real.
00:47:32Damn it!
00:47:34Fuck.
00:47:34Fuck.
00:47:40I'm so sorry.
00:47:42Are you nuts?
00:47:43Nuts?
00:47:46Is that all your men got?
00:47:48Yeah, I'm nuts.
00:47:49But you guys eat those cooked by nuts.
00:47:51Sleep with nuts.
00:47:52Have kids with nuts.
00:47:54You are the real nuts here.
00:47:55No offense, but I'm Chris Roberts.
00:47:58I only sleep with supermodels under 25 years old.
00:48:01Only supermodels.
00:48:07Screw you, fuck Chris Roberts!
00:48:18Shit!
00:48:19I sold the house.
00:48:28You got till tonight to move out, or your stuff will be thrown away.
00:48:34If you want to divorce me, fine!
00:48:36Go ahead!
00:48:38But how dare you sell our house without my consent!
00:48:43I'll sue you!
00:48:44Think you can afford a lawyer?
00:48:46Don't mess with me, or fight for a custody for our staff.
00:48:50Jobless housewife like you won't stand a chance.
00:48:53Despicable!
00:48:55So, you divorced?
00:48:56It's none of your business!
00:48:59Marry me!
00:49:06Are you insane?
00:49:10My car's worth $4 million.
00:49:13You want to talk about marriage?
00:49:16Or compensation?
00:49:19This way, ma'am.
00:49:23Watch your step, ma'am.
00:49:26Welcome, ma'am.
00:49:43Wow.
00:49:44So, it's your house at 5th Central Avenue.
00:49:47I've seen it in a magazine.
00:49:48So, I get a room like this for a fake marriage?
00:50:06No.
00:50:07This is for Elizabeth, my dog.
00:50:09Yours is upstairs.
00:50:10Bigger and better.
00:50:12Forget that.
00:50:13Come sign the contract.
00:50:14Sign this, and you will be my wife.
00:50:20Sorry, what's your name again?
00:50:22Aubrey.
00:50:23Okay.
00:50:24Aubrey, listen to me.
00:50:26I love you for more than 10 years.
00:50:28I heard that you're divorced.
00:50:31So, I popped the question right away.
00:50:35What?
00:50:36Really?
00:50:36Are you kidding me?
00:50:38Aubrey, this marriage is just for show.
00:50:40I hope you won't catch real feelings for me.
00:50:45Relax.
00:50:46Not falling for you as easy as drinking and eating.
00:50:48Great.
00:50:49That's amazing.
00:50:50Once I secure the role and back that Oscar, we'll part our ways smoothly.
00:50:57So, we stuck together until we win an Oscar?
00:51:01Might as well say, till that do us a part.
00:51:05Don't worry about that.
00:51:05I'm going to pay you an acting salary, the same as I do with my models and actors.
00:51:11You're Chris Roberts.
00:51:13Those actresses must earn a fortune.
00:51:15Considering our attitude, I'm going to go with minimum wage.
00:51:19Usually, they pay around 500 grand, and now, 150K.
00:51:23That's enough for you.
00:51:25Per year?
00:51:26Per month, of course.
00:51:28Per month, of course.
00:51:58I'm aware of the divorce.
00:52:08Good lord.
00:52:09That looks calorie-packed.
00:52:12First, it's not for you.
00:52:14Second, I hate when people reduce food to calories.
00:52:18Jeez, touchy.
00:52:20It'll make my loving you seem even more dramatic.
00:52:24Keep that up.
00:52:25Another thing, clear your schedule for tomorrow.
00:52:27We're meeting the director.
00:52:30Already?
00:52:31This is your first time stepping out as my wife, and I really want you to take it seriously.
00:52:36You need to dress up nicely, alright?
00:52:38Because it's going to be the first time that you're going to act as my wife.
00:52:42Come on.
00:52:42This top I'm wearing is like from the supermarket.
00:52:46We'll solve this problem right now.
00:52:47Hey, Brad.
00:52:51Didn't you say you could transform any woman?
00:52:55Oh my god.
00:52:57I didn't expect this to be such a huge project.
00:53:01Luckily, I'm a Hollywood-style-ish.
00:53:03Alright, girls.
00:53:05Let's get going.
00:53:08Right here.
00:53:09I got it.
00:53:18Are you okay, Liz?
00:53:20Watch out.
00:53:21Please calm down.
00:53:22Can we sit up back here?
00:53:23Get him out of here.
00:53:24Oh my god.
00:53:26Are you okay, baby?
00:53:26Are these ladies' fashion pieces worth the expense for her?
00:53:37She's my wife now, so yes, it's worth it.
00:53:42Baby Ro, I did my best today.
00:53:45Remember, Rome wasn't built in the day.
00:53:48How do I look?
00:54:04Wow.
00:54:05You're the most beautiful you have ever seen.
00:54:10Wow.
00:54:11You sure ain't sure of that ass.
00:54:13Why are you closing the Victoria's Secret show this year?
00:54:16Julia, your acting skills surpassed mine.
00:54:21That's what handling a big story does to me.
00:54:24Let's go, girls.
00:54:25Thank you so much, guys.
00:54:26No problem, baby.
00:54:29Jeez.
00:54:30How did I not realize my backside has such potential?
00:54:34Just like Kardashians.
00:54:36Guess you regret this fake marriage now, huh?
00:54:40God is fair.
00:54:41Though he didn't bless you with a fury physique,
00:54:44he gave you unbridled confidence.
00:54:46Wow.
00:54:51You're totally gonna nail that role now.
00:54:53We look so perfect together.
00:54:55It's a match made in heaven.
00:55:08No, no, no.
00:55:09There's no spark between you two.
00:55:11You don't love your wife at all.
00:55:13I'm sorry that I can't give you this role.
00:55:15But we haven't even started talking.
00:55:17You know the law talk is about feeling.
00:55:20I don't feel your love for her.
00:55:23He's crazy about me.
00:55:25The moment I was divorced,
00:55:26he swooped in with a helicopter proposal.
00:55:29I love you, baby.
00:55:32That's because I just can't wait to spend the rest of my life with you.
00:55:36Come back to me.
00:55:41Or you'll learn to be a proper lover.
00:55:45Jeez.
00:55:46Are you sure he's top Hollywood's director and not some charlatan?
00:55:51Yes.
00:55:51But he did catch you rolling your eyes at me.
00:55:53Maybe it's only because you ordered a cup of water?
00:55:56Any steak?
00:55:56Perhaps that's to avoid your dress zipper bursting from one extra bite.
00:56:01You guessed right.
00:56:07Much better now.
00:56:08Can you eat quieter?
00:56:22You're disturbing my reading.
00:56:32You're married?
00:56:33What's up?
00:56:34What?
00:56:35Your daughter's in the hospital with a fever?
00:56:37Yeah, of course.
00:56:37I can cover your shift today.
00:56:40Where are you going?
00:56:42The contract doesn't require me to report my personal itinerary to you.
00:56:53Aubrey, what are you doing here?
00:56:56You're not stalking me, are you?
00:56:58Listen, stop harassing me.
00:57:00Tiffany and I are engaged.
00:57:03Sorry to disappoint you, but I'm married too.
00:57:06It's not just you who found someone new.
00:57:09Jim!
00:57:10I told you she put up a front about finding someone else.
00:57:16I do have a husband.
00:57:17And he's hotter, wealthier, and lasts longer in bed than you ever did.
00:57:22If he's so great,
00:57:24why is an old-timer like you still going here serving tapes?
00:57:28Come on, man.
00:57:28Don't just stand there.
00:57:30Serve us.
00:57:30I want hot tea.
00:57:44Jeez.
00:57:45You trying to scald me?
00:57:56Are you satisfied now?
00:57:57That's better.
00:57:59Drink up, dear.
00:58:01Ouch!
00:58:02This huge diamond ring makes it hard to lift my hand.
00:58:07Check out my engagement ring from Mark.
00:58:10It's whopping two carats.
00:58:11I heard your wedding ring was a freebie that came with some furniture shopping, wasn't it?
00:58:21Wow, good for you.
00:58:24And when you guys eventually split,
00:58:25you will get a nice chunk of change from selling this treasure.
00:58:32Don't stupid or level.
00:58:33You, go and get the steaks ready in ten minutes.
00:58:37Else, I'll be reporting you.
00:58:39I said half an hour when you ordered.
00:58:42Then figure it out.
00:58:45Wait.
00:58:46Top off my water.
00:58:53Mary, you owe me a proper meal.
00:58:56I'll refrain from stabbing those two for your job's sake.
00:58:59Aubrey, why are you waitressing?
00:59:05We're not really married.
00:59:06What I do is none of your business.
00:59:10Let's go.
00:59:11The advertisers are waiting.
00:59:15Keep an eye on her.
00:59:17Make sure nobody messes with her.
00:59:19I'm not her agent.
00:59:20But she's my wife, at least on paper.
00:59:22Okay, guys.
00:59:23If you don't need anything else,
00:59:24I'm going to head out and change shifts.
00:59:26Oh my god.
00:59:29My ring.
00:59:30It's gone.
00:59:31Since you're the only one serving us,
00:59:33I suspect you stole my ring.
00:59:36Just because you're a bitch,
00:59:37doesn't mean everyone is.
00:59:38I wouldn't even want to touch the stuff you've worn,
00:59:42let alone steal it.
00:59:43Denial won't help.
00:59:46It's only you somewhere.
00:59:50See?
00:59:51This is proof.
00:59:52I'm going to have you fired.
00:59:59No way!
01:00:00You're framing me on purpose.
01:00:06Got it.
01:00:07Get the restaurant owner over here for me.
01:00:12You and your husband are so sweet.
01:00:15Always remember to buy his favorite pizza.
01:00:17Sweet?
01:00:18We haven't gotten busy since Thanksgiving three years ago.
01:00:24Look at them.
01:00:25That's what we call sweet.
01:00:27I wish my hubby was like that.
01:00:30Fuck, that's actually my husband.
01:00:32You jerk cheating on me behind my back.
01:00:34Aubrey.
01:00:35Let me explain.
01:00:37Wait, wait, wait.
01:00:38Stop.
01:00:39Stop.
01:00:41All right, enough.
01:00:45Cut it out.
01:00:46I wouldn't have to be out here messing around
01:00:50if you didn't push me to do it.
01:00:53Look at yourself.
01:00:54Sloppy.
01:00:56You're rude.
01:00:58Totally unfeminine.
01:01:00I want a divorce.
01:01:02Crazy lady.
01:01:11Karma will get that scumbag.
01:01:13No need for karma.
01:01:14I can handle this myself.
01:01:15Hand me the car key.
01:01:26Chris,
01:01:27Leo snucked the row you wanted.
01:01:29No way.
01:01:31Why him?
01:01:32I cannot understand that.
01:01:33He has fewer Instagram followers than me,
01:01:35and his last movie made only $100 million.
01:01:37The director's looking for a guy who's totally devoted to his wife.
01:01:42Leo and his wife are Hollywood's poster couple for true love.
01:01:46What about you?
01:01:47You're a 40-year-old bachelor,
01:01:49known around town as a total playboy.
01:01:51What if I told everyone that I've actually been in love with one woman for all those years,
01:01:59but she's married,
01:02:00and all my wild dating was just to try and forget her.
01:02:02You think that would lend me the role?
01:02:04Sounds more like excused me.
01:02:07That's not good enough, huh?
01:02:09All right.
01:02:10Do I have to say she just got divorced,
01:02:12and I'm rushing to marry her,
01:02:14vowing to never look at another supermodel again
01:02:16to prove I can be a committed guy?
01:02:18Now that's a story people might buy into.
01:02:22But the problem is,
01:02:24you're just making this up on the spot.
01:02:26All right.
01:02:29I wish a woman like that would just fall into my life for real.
01:02:35Damn it!
01:02:37Fuck.
01:02:44I'm so sorry.
01:02:45Are you nuts?
01:02:46Nuts?
01:02:48Is that all your men got?
01:02:51Yeah, I'm nuts.
01:02:52But you guys eat your coke by nuts,
01:02:55sleep with nuts,
01:02:56have kids with nuts.
01:02:57You are the real nuts here.
01:02:59No offense,
01:03:00but I'm Chris Roberts.
01:03:01I only sleep with supermodels under 25 years old.
01:03:07Only supermodels.
01:03:10Screw you, fuck, Chris Roberts.
01:03:12Ah!
01:03:13I sold the house.
01:03:31You've got till tonight to move out,
01:03:33or your stuff will be thrown away.
01:03:35If you want to divorce me,
01:03:39fine!
01:03:40Go ahead!
01:03:41But how dare you sell our house
01:03:44without my consent!
01:03:46I'll sue you!
01:03:47Think you can afford a lawyer?
01:03:49Don't mess with me.
01:03:51I'll apply for a custody for our son.
01:03:53A jobless housewife like you
01:03:54won't stand a chance.
01:03:57Despicable!
01:03:57So, you divorced?
01:04:00It's none of your business!
01:04:02Marry me!
01:04:09Are you insane?
01:04:13My car's worth $4 million.
01:04:16You want to talk about marriage?
01:04:19Or compensation?
01:04:22This win, ma'am.
01:04:23What's your step, ma'am?
01:04:35Welcome, ma'am.
01:04:46Wow!
01:04:47So, it's your house at 5 Central Avenue.
01:04:50I've seen it in a magazine.
01:04:53So, I get a room like this
01:05:08for a fake marriage?
01:05:09No.
01:05:10This is for Elizabeth, my dog.
01:05:12Yours is upstairs.
01:05:13Bigger and better.
01:05:15Forget that.
01:05:16Come sign the contract.
01:05:21Sign this,
01:05:22and you will be my wife.
01:05:23Sorry, what's your name again?
01:05:25Aubrey.
01:05:26Okay.
01:05:27Aubrey,
01:05:28listen to me.
01:05:29I love you
01:05:30for more than 10 years.
01:05:32I heard
01:05:32that you're divorced.
01:05:35So,
01:05:35I popped the question right away.
01:05:38What?
01:05:39Really?
01:05:40Are you kidding me?
01:05:42Aubrey,
01:05:42this marriage is just for show.
01:05:44I hope you won't catch
01:05:45real feelings for me.
01:05:48Relax.
01:05:49Not falling for you
01:05:50as easy as drinking and eating.
01:05:51Great.
01:05:52That's amazing.
01:05:53Once I secure the role
01:05:55and back that Oscar,
01:05:56we'll part our ways
01:05:58smoothly.
01:06:01So, we stuck together
01:06:02until we win an Oscar?
01:06:05Might as well say,
01:06:06so that do us a part.
01:06:08Don't worry about that.
01:06:09I'm going to pay you
01:06:10an acting salary.
01:06:12The same as I do
01:06:12with my models and actors.
01:06:14You're Chris Roberts.
01:06:16Those actresses
01:06:17must earn a fortune.
01:06:18Considering our attitude,
01:06:20I'm going to go
01:06:20with minimum wage.
01:06:22Usually,
01:06:22they pay around
01:06:23500 grand
01:06:24and now,
01:06:25150K.
01:06:26That's enough for you.
01:06:29Per year?
01:06:29Per month,
01:06:30of course.
01:06:31So, you have a son?
01:06:46Don't get me wrong.
01:06:47Just want to know
01:06:48more about my wife.
01:06:54Yeah.
01:06:56His name is Luke.
01:06:57He's nine.
01:06:58In summer camp,
01:07:01I'm aware of the divorce.
01:07:11Good lord.
01:07:12That looks calorie-packed.
01:07:15First,
01:07:16it's not for you.
01:07:17Second,
01:07:17I hate when people
01:07:18reduce food to calories.
01:07:21Jeez,
01:07:22touchy.
01:07:23It'll make my loving you
01:07:25seem even more dramatic.
01:07:27Keep that up.
01:07:28Another thing,
01:07:29clear your schedule
01:07:30for tomorrow.
01:07:31We're meeting the director.
01:07:33Already?
01:07:34This is your first time
01:07:36stepping out as my wife
01:07:37and I really want you
01:07:38to take it seriously.
01:07:39You need to dress up nicely,
01:07:41alright?
01:07:41Because it's going to be
01:07:42the first time
01:07:43that you're going to act
01:07:44as my wife.
01:07:45Come on.
01:07:46This top I'm wearing
01:07:47is like from the supermarket.
01:07:49I'll solve this problem
01:07:50right now.
01:07:52Hey, Brad.
01:07:52Didn't you say
01:07:55you could transform
01:07:56any woman?
01:07:58Oh my god.
01:08:01I didn't expect
01:08:01this to be such a
01:08:02huge project.
01:08:04But luckily,
01:08:05I'm a Hollywood stylish.
01:08:07Alright, girls.
01:08:08Let's get going.
01:08:11Right here.
01:08:12I got it.
01:08:21Are you okay, baby?
01:08:23Watch out.
01:08:24Boys, calm down.
01:08:25Can you set up back here?
01:08:26Sit down.
01:08:27Get him back here.
01:08:28Oh my god.
01:08:29Are you okay, baby?
01:08:35Are these ladies'
01:08:37fashion pieces
01:08:38worth the expense for her?
01:08:40She's my wife now.
01:08:41So yes,
01:08:42it's worth it.
01:08:45Baby Ro,
01:08:46I did my best today.
01:08:48Remember,
01:08:50Rome wasn't built in the day.
01:08:58How do I look?
01:09:07Wow.
01:09:08You're the most beautiful
01:09:10you have ever seen.
01:09:14Wow.
01:09:14You sure ain't sure
01:09:15of that ass.
01:09:16Why are you closing
01:09:17the Victoria's Secret show
01:09:18this year?
01:09:20Julia,
01:09:21your acting skills
01:09:22surpassed mine.
01:09:24That's what handling
01:09:25a big story does to me.
01:09:27Let's go, girls.
01:09:28Thank you so much, guys.
01:09:30No problem, baby.
01:09:32Jeez.
01:09:33How did I not realize
01:09:35my backside
01:09:35has such potential?
01:09:37Just like
01:09:38Kardashians.
01:09:39Guess
01:09:40you regret
01:09:40this fake marriage
01:09:41now, huh?
01:09:43God is fair.
01:09:45Though he didn't
01:09:45bless you
01:09:46with a fury physique,
01:09:47he gave you
01:09:48unbridled confidence.
01:09:53Wow.
01:09:54You're totally
01:09:55gonna nail that role now.
01:09:56We look so
01:09:56perfect together.
01:09:58It's a match
01:09:59made in heaven.
01:10:11No, no, no.
01:10:12There's no spark
01:10:13between you two.
01:10:15You don't love
01:10:15your wife at all.
01:10:16I'm sorry
01:10:17that I can't
01:10:18give you this role.
01:10:19But we haven't
01:10:19even started talking.
01:10:21You know
01:10:21the lot talk
01:10:22is about feeling.
01:10:23I don't feel
01:10:24your love for her.
01:10:26He's crazy
01:10:27about me.
01:10:28The moment
01:10:29I was divorced,
01:10:30he swooped in
01:10:30with a helicopter
01:10:32proposal.
01:10:34I love you, baby.
01:10:36That's because
01:10:36I just can't wait
01:10:37to spend the rest
01:10:38of my life with you.
01:10:39Come back to me
01:10:44or you'll learn
01:10:45to be a proper
01:10:46of her.
01:10:49Jeez.
01:10:49Are you sure
01:10:50he's top
01:10:51Hollywood's director
01:10:52and not some charlatan?
01:10:54Yes,
01:10:54but he did catch you
01:10:55rolling your eyes at me.
01:10:57Maybe it's only because
01:10:58you ordered a cup of water
01:10:59and a steak?
01:11:00Perhaps that's to
01:11:00avoid your dress zipper
01:11:02bursting from
01:11:03one extra bite.
01:11:05You guessed right.
01:11:10Much better now.
01:11:23Can you eat quieter?
01:11:25You're disturbing
01:11:26my reading.
01:11:33You're married?
01:11:36What's up?
01:11:38What?
01:11:38Your daughter's
01:11:39in the hospital
01:11:39with a fever?
01:11:40Yeah, of course.
01:11:41I can cover your shift today.
01:11:44Where are you going?
01:11:45The contract
01:11:46doesn't require me
01:11:47to report my
01:11:48personal itinerary to you.
01:11:56Aubrey,
01:11:56what are you doing here?
01:11:59You're not
01:11:59stalking me,
01:12:00are you?
01:12:01Listen,
01:12:02stop harassing me.
01:12:03Tiffany and I
01:12:04are engaged.
01:12:07Sorry to disappoint you,
01:12:08but I'm married too.
01:12:10It's not just you
01:12:11who found someone new.
01:12:12Jim!
01:12:13I told you
01:12:14she put up a front
01:12:15about finding someone else.
01:12:19I do have a husband
01:12:20and he's hotter,
01:12:22wealthier,
01:12:23and lasts longer
01:12:24in bed than you ever did.
01:12:25If he's so great,
01:12:27why's an old-timer like you
01:12:29still going here
01:12:30serving tapes?
01:12:31Come on, man.
01:12:32Don't just stand there.
01:12:33serve us.
01:12:35I want
01:12:36hot tea.
01:12:47Jeez.
01:12:48You trying to
01:12:49sculpt me?
01:12:49Are you satisfied now?
01:13:01That's better.
01:13:03Drink up, dear.
01:13:05Ouch!
01:13:06This huge diamond ring
01:13:08makes it hard to lift my hand.
01:13:10Check out my engagement ring
01:13:12from Mark.
01:13:13It's whopping two carats.
01:13:16I heard your wedding ring
01:13:17was a freebie
01:13:20that came with
01:13:21some furniture shopping,
01:13:23wasn't it?
01:13:24Wow.
01:13:25Good for you.
01:13:27And when you guys
01:13:28eventually split,
01:13:29you will get
01:13:30a nice chunk of change
01:13:32from selling
01:13:32this treasure.
01:13:35Don't stupid or level.
01:13:37You,
01:13:38go and get the stakes
01:13:39ready in ten minutes,
01:13:40else I'll be reporting you.
01:13:42I said
01:13:43half an hour
01:13:44when you ordered.
01:13:45Then
01:13:46figure it out.
01:13:48Wait.
01:13:50Tub off my water.
01:13:51Mary,
01:13:57you owe me
01:13:58a proper meal.
01:13:59I refrain
01:14:00from stabbing
01:14:01those two
01:14:01for your job's sake.
01:14:06Aubrey?
01:14:06Why are you
01:14:07waitressing?
01:14:08We're not really married.
01:14:09What I do
01:14:10is none of your business.
01:14:14Let's go.
01:14:14The advertisers
01:14:15are waiting.
01:14:18Keep an eye on her.
01:14:19Make sure nobody
01:14:21messes with her.
01:14:22I'm not her agent.
01:14:23But she's my wife,
01:14:24at least on paper.
01:14:25Okay guys,
01:14:26if you don't need
01:14:27anything else,
01:14:28I'm gonna head out
01:14:28and change shifts.
01:14:30Oh my god.
01:14:32My ray.
01:14:33It's gone.
01:14:35Since you're
01:14:35the only one serving us,
01:14:37I suspect
01:14:37you stole my ray.
01:14:39Just because
01:14:39you're a bitch
01:14:40doesn't mean
01:14:41everyone is.
01:14:42I wouldn't even
01:14:42want to touch
01:14:44the stuff you've worn,
01:14:45let alone steal it.
01:14:47Then now
01:14:47it won't help.
01:14:48It's only you
01:14:50somewhere.
01:14:53See?
01:14:54This is proof.
01:14:59I'm gonna have you
01:15:01fired.
01:15:02No way!
01:15:03You're framing me
01:15:03on purpose.
01:15:09Got it.
01:15:11Get the restaurant owner
01:15:12over here for me.
01:15:18Get the restaurant owner
01:15:19over here for me.
01:15:19Get the restaurant owner
01:15:20over here for me.
01:15:20Get the restaurant owner
01:15:21over here for me.
01:15:21Get the restaurant owner
01:15:22over here for me.
01:15:22Get the restaurant owner
01:15:23over here for me.
01:15:23Get the restaurant owner
01:15:23over here for me.
01:15:24Get the restaurant owner
01:15:24over here for me.
01:15:25Get the restaurant owner
01:15:25over here for me.
01:15:26Get the restaurant owner
01:15:26over here for me.
01:15:27Get the restaurant owner
01:15:27over here for me.
01:15:28Get the restaurant owner
01:15:28over here for me.
01:15:29Get the restaurant owner
01:15:29over here for me.
01:15:30Get the restaurant owner
01:15:30over here for me.
01:15:31Get the restaurant owner
01:15:31over here for me.
01:15:32Get the restaurant owner
01:15:32over here for me.
01:15:33Get the restaurant owner
01:15:33over here for me.
01:15:34Get the restaurant owner
01:15:34over here for me.
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