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And you thought the kids from "South Park" were bad! Welcome to WatchMojo, and today we’re counting down our picks for the most outlandish and mind-numbingly stupid things parents have done in our favorite mountain town.
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00:00Play Canada! Play Canada!
00:03You need your form full of salt!
00:05You need your salt!
00:06Welcome to WatchMojo, and today we're counting down our picks for the most outlandish and
00:11mind-numbingly stupid things parents have done in our favorite mountain town.
00:16Probably shouldn't have told you that just now, okay? That was probably bad.
00:24Number 20. Turning Kenny's Neighborhood into a Soto Sopa
00:28The truth is there's something we're lacking as a community, and it's time we all faced it.
00:33What this town needs is a Whole Foods.
00:38It only took an overwhelming desire to get a Whole Foods in South Park
00:42to destroy Kenny's Neighborhood and a long-time restaurant's business.
00:50With help from the residents, the mayor funds a gentrification project
00:54meant to attract more affluent hipsters and businesses in hopes to impress the folks at Whole Foods.
01:00The entire fiasco highlights just how out of touch Mayor McDaniels, Randy, and many others are to those who are less fortunate than themselves.
01:09I've never seen a town put so much energy into displaying an exaggerated sense of social consciousness.
01:16Congratulations, you have your Whole Foods.
01:18Sure, the town does eventually get their supermarket, but only at the expense of both Kenny's family and the poor CityWalk owner.
01:26Number 19. Randy Buys a Blockbuster
01:30We are going into business for ourselves!
01:33You are all looking at the new owner of Blockbuster Video.
01:41It's somewhat common knowledge that today streaming services have all but replaced physical mediums like VHS and DVD.
01:49So it comes as a massive surprise to both his wife and kids that Randy decides to purchase and reopen a blockbuster video store.
01:58But you're wrong! The average person still wants to rent movies they can hold in their hands!
02:04That alone should be enough to put him in the dumbest decisions ever category.
02:08But his naivety knows no bounds as he continues to insist that not only is there a demand for his store,
02:14but he forces the whole family to work there.
02:17Of all Randy's bad choices, this has to rank as one of the worst.
02:23Yet, as dumb as Randy's decision was, we can at least give props for the awesome tribute to The Shining the episode gave us.
02:32Number 18. Abandon their kids to protest a TV show
02:37One of the earliest schticks of South Park was flipping the narrative to show how the kids always seemed to be more intelligent.
02:44than the parents.
02:45It only took six episodes before we saw the most glaring example of this.
02:51Young man, you are not to watch that show anymore! It's immature toilet humor!
02:56When Kyle's mom learns of the boys' love of Terence and Phillip, she convinces all the parents in town to protest the network airing the show.
03:04With all the adults gone, the kids are left to fend for themselves.
03:07The episode shows how the parents seem more interested in fighting causes to help their kids versus actually taking care of them.
03:17Number 17. Purposely giving their kids chicken pox
03:22Chicken pox is a common disease that can be far more serious as an adult than a child.
03:26But does that really excuse purposely exposing kids to a virus?
03:30But I started thinking that we should intentionally have our boys play with a child who has the chicken pox.
03:35Let them get it now while they're young!
03:37That's not crazy at all, Sharon!
03:39Such is the case in South Park, when Kenny catches the disease and the parents decide to send the other children over to his place to try and expose them to it.
03:48The boys learn about this and find a way to creatively get back at their parents for their deception.
03:53It's some kind of parental conspiracy! Our parents are trying to kill us or something!
03:57We'd like to think the parents were just trying to do what they thought was best, but come on! There's vaccines for that now!
04:03You little rascals!
04:05Well, I guess it serves us right.
04:07Number 16. Randy purposely contracts testicular cancer
04:11There was a time when marijuana could only be legally obtained through a card issued by a doctor.
04:18Oh, that's dumb!
04:20So when Randy learns he can get weed if he has cancer, he goes to extreme lengths to purposely give himself the disease, all in the name of getting high.
04:30Just gonna get a little bit of cancer, Stan!
04:32Others follow suit, and before you know it, they all end up with testicular cancer.
04:37They literally bounce around with joy, high as a kite.
04:42All of this just to get their hands on some pot.
04:46Clearly, none of these dads considered how bad things can get when you contract cancer.
04:52Well, I gotta admit, it's a lot easier to get inside doors with my little prosthetic balls.
04:57Number 15. Randy gets in Little League fights
05:01If you've ever had kids who play in Little League Baseball, you've probably seen dads just like Randy.
05:19They trash talk and are overly obnoxious whilst everyone else is just trying to enjoy the game.
05:25That in itself is annoying, but not unexpected.
05:31Randy, however, takes it to a new level by picking fights with other dads, resulting in physical violence.
05:38It's fine to want to support your kids' extracurricular activities, but purposely goading other parents for the sake of a fistfight is not the way to go.
05:48Number 14. Obsessing Over True Crime Shows
05:52What if the story were flipped, and it was the kids who were so worried about what their moms and dads were watching?
05:59How is this stuff allowed to stay on the air?
06:01It's an incredibly clever switch-up, yet showcases how truly dumbfounding the parents in this town can be.
06:08Randy, Sharon, and countless other parents become overly obsessed with crime reenactment shows.
06:14Yes, Stan, these are based on real things. This is like news. It's informative. Parents like informative stuff.
06:20The great lengths they go to try and get back their crime shows really highlights how truly dumb these so-called adults really are.
06:29Number 13. Clyde's Mom Falling in a Toilet
06:34What is that?
06:37A toilet?
06:38Leave it to South Park to find a hilarious way to mock one of the oldest debates among men and women.
06:44Putting the toilet seat down.
06:46Some argue that if putting the toilet seat down is a big deal for you, why not just do it yourself when using the restroom?
06:52Others argue that in the middle of the night, you may not notice it and end up sitting in toilet water.
06:58It's the latter of these two which South Park chose to mock.
07:02What have I told you about putting the toilet seat down after you go to the bathroom?
07:06Mom, I'm in class.
07:08How many times do I have to tell you, Clyde? I was trying to get ready for work and the toilet seat was up again.
07:13Betsy, come back home. It's just not that big a deal.
07:16No, Roger. It's a disgusting habit and I'm sick and tired of it.
07:19Clyde's Mom is apparently so incredibly naive that she actually gets stuck in the toilet and dies.
07:26Yes, the toilet seat thing can be annoying, but come on, Betsy, really?
07:3212. Forcing Conversion Therapy
07:36An inappropriate photo of Butters triggers his father to claim the young boy is confused about his sexuality
07:43and sends him to a conversion therapy camp.
07:46Butters himself has no idea what the camp is really for.
07:49While there, he continues to be disoriented by their military-like behavior of the staff
07:55and the repeated attempts by other confused kids to end their stay once and for all.
08:01None of the adults or parents seem to have any clue about the damage or hurt they are causing.
08:07By the end of it, Butters stands clear and tall, making it known that it is the parents and counselors who are confused.
08:15You know what I think? I think maybe you're the ones who are confused.
08:19Yeah.
08:20Number 11. Ignoring Man Bear Pig's Attacks
08:24Truth be told, this could be said of both the parents and kids, but let's focus on the former.
08:30Man Bear Pig has always served as a stand-in for climate change within the bounds of South Park.
08:35During a two-parter in Season 22, MBP goes on a rampage, killing a bunch of locals.
08:42Despite their horrific deaths, law enforcement, many of the parents, and other adults alike continue to deny that MBP is real.
08:50What you need to understand, Susan, is that everyone has an agenda.
08:54A massive destructive force is literally tearing people to shreds and they continue to question its legitimacy?
09:02Nothing is more confusing than continuing to deny something is real when everything around you says otherwise.
09:10That's an excellent question. There's definitely evidence that all the death and destruction around us is due to a Man Bear Pig.
09:16But no exact correlation to a Man Bear Pig.
09:19Definitely not and that's why we're all here to try to pinpoint.
09:21Number 10. Electing a Hand Puppet as Mayor
09:25In the appropriately named South Park the Fractured But Whole, the kids discover that Mitch Conner, Cartman's dastardly left hand, has returned to take over South Park by running for mayor.
09:37The citizens of South Park deserve to feel safe. Safe from vigilantes who go around farting on people's heads.
09:44His plan? Get all the adults hooked on drugs and alcohol with cat urine while letting criminals roam free to make Mayor McDaniels look bad.
09:53What do we do, sir?
09:55Just keep getting the product into people's drugs and alcohol. I'll handle the vigilante.
10:01His plan succeeds in the first timeline, but when the new kid rewinds time, the kids manage to expose Mitch's plan before his inauguration.
10:10Although, let's be honest, this was Cartman's doing the whole time.
10:14Rather than analyze their stupidity and overindulgence, the adults all choose to disperse in search of clean drugs and alcohol.
10:23If only that really exists.
10:25Come on, everybody! Let's go get clean drugs and alcohol from the next town over!
10:30Yeah!
10:31Number 9. Getting Earth Blocked Off
10:35Yeah!
10:36Alright, you got him, son!
10:38After bringing down a notorious space criminal, the adults find themselves stuck with a ludicrous amount of space cash.
10:45Space cash.
10:47However, instead of reporting and returning it to the intergalactic police, they choose to keep the stolen cash for themselves, lie to the police, and begin using it as their own currency.
10:57Oh, no, no, China! We get to keep the ship! Because we killed the alien, ya boner! Oh, come on, England! You got just as much of the space cash as everyone else!
11:07As it turns out, the criminal and his space cash were all part of a test to see if Earth was eligible to become a part of an elite legion of intergalactic societies.
11:17These are not space cops! There is no space jail, and space cash is only worth what you as a planet decided it was worth!
11:25Citing their greed and self-indulgent behavior, the criminal, who is revealed to be an ambassador of the Legion, isolates Earth from the rest of the universe.
11:34Well, that sucks!
11:35Number 8. Dressing Up As Ghosts To Scare Off Rich People
11:40When Tolkien manages to get rich families to move to South Park, Garrison becomes irritated with the sudden change and rallies some of the townsfolk to get rid of them.
11:50That's the fifth family of them that's moved here. Seems like all of a sudden South Park is being overrun by those types.
11:56Hey, what are you saying? What types?
11:59You know, those types. Rich people.
12:02However, their methods are a little unorthodox, to say the least, as their methods for scaring the rich away involve burning a lowercase t that supposedly stands for Time To Leave?
12:16To make matters worse, they dress up as ghosts as their last resort to get the rich to leave.
12:22While their plan works, unfortunately, the ending implies that Garrison managed to trick the town into temporarily becoming the KKK
12:31in a convoluted get-rich-quick scheme. How did nobody realize this sooner?
12:36That was it! We just saw the last of them speeding away in a van!
12:40Alright!
12:41Number 7. Explaining The Plot Of An Adult Film
12:45When Randy has the boys give the Stotches a rental of Lord of the Rings, he soon discovers he accidentally gave them a pornographic film.
12:54And so, he and the rest of the parents end up searching for the kids before their innocent eyes experience it.
13:01Luckily, they find them.
13:03But rather than explaining the problem, Randy chooses to explain the plot in immense detail, leaving the boys speechless.
13:11But you must make sure your partner is okay with it before you start doing it.
13:15Okay, boys. Do you have any questions?
13:17Given that Tolkien watched the movie, we can understand his assumption.
13:21But the stupidity lies in his negligence to ask, let alone leave the kids confused.
13:28Wow!
13:29Number 6. Believing Butters Had Multiple Personality Disorder
13:34Honk, honk!
13:35Break a one, nine, break a one, nine!
13:37It's clean clear out to Flagtown, looks like we got ourselves a convoy!
13:41Honk, honk!
13:42Now he thinks he's a truck driver!
13:46Oh god, the medication isn't working!
13:49Talk about being overly paranoid.
13:52After witnessing their son putting on multiple personas or, as the kids call it, playing pretend,
13:59Linda and Steven believe their little Butters has multiple personality disorder, and place him in therapy with Dr. Janus.
14:07Butters quickly becomes frustrated with his predicament, as he finds his own doctor is the one suffering from the illness.
14:14Don't listen to Dr. Janus! He's a mean old man and a big silly grown-up!
14:20We gotta side with Butters on this one.
14:22Playing pretend is nothing alarming.
14:24Kids do it all the time, and even adults can adopt personas.
14:28Besides, Butters is just enjoying his life as a postman slash truck driver.
14:33Let the kid have a little fun!
14:35No more Postman Butters!
14:37No more Inspector Butters!
14:39Number 5.
14:40Burying their heads in sand to prevent an attack.
14:43Kyle!
14:44What the hell is going on this time?
14:46I have no idea!
14:47Once again, Family Guy is gone and angered another part of the world, getting ready to air a new episode that depicts the Prophet Muhammad.
14:56So?
14:57So?!
14:58Stanley, Muhammad is sacred to the Muslim people!
15:01While Kyle tries to stop Cartman from getting the episode pulled, the townsfolk of South Park are thrown into a blind panic, wondering how to keep themselves from getting bombed by Muslim terrorists.
15:13Just so they could say they never saw the episode, the whole town ends up burying their heads in sand.
15:19There are two issues here.
15:24First off, the terrorists were threatening the whole country, not just South Park.
15:29And two, who was going to bury the last person's head in the sand?
15:33This was an absurd plan conjured up in a desperate move to claim innocence.
15:38Number 4.
15:40Banishing Stan for refusing to vote.
15:43South Park Elementary finds themselves in a chaotic split where the candidates for the school's new mascots were announced.
15:51One half wants the Giant Douche, and the other half wants the Turd Sandwich.
15:55You see, what Turd Sandwich brings to our school cloud is a complete package.
15:59The turd and the bread, and the lettuce, and the olive.
16:02Whereas Giant Douche is just, well, just a giant douche.
16:08The only student who doesn't seem to care is Stan Marsh.
16:12And when he voices his apathy, the town straps him on a horse and sends him packing.
16:18Dad, isn't this a little extreme?
16:19Jesus.
16:20I guess maybe you'll never understand how important voting is.
16:24Goodbye, son.
16:26Considering the number of awful things Eric Cartman has done, this is all it took for Stan to be exiled?
16:32We guess South Park considers not voting to be worse than making a kid eat his own parents.
16:39Do you like it, Scott?
16:40I call it Mr. and Mrs. Tenerman Chili.
16:43Number 3.
16:44Banning Cats.
16:46Probably shouldn't have told you that just now.
16:49Okay.
16:50That was probably bad.
16:55Alright, this should keep my cat in place while he sprays the urine.
16:57The kids have found a new way to get high.
17:00And the drugs are right in their homes.
17:03When the adults discover it is possible to get high off of cat urine, they take extreme measures to protect their children.
17:10Going so far as to straight up ban all cats.
17:14Of course, that doesn't stop Kenny from getting hopped up on what is called cheesing.
17:19And Cartman ends up housing dozens of cats in his attic.
17:23Shhh, little kitty, you have to be twat.
17:25Or else they're gonna find you.
17:26Clearly, this overblown ban could be foreseen as difficult to enforce.
17:31But what else could we expect from the grown-ups at this point?
17:34I'll just do it one more time.
17:36One last time.
17:38Then I'll call the police, have them pick up the cat.
17:41And then I'll never do it again.
17:43Number 2.
17:44Sending Their Children Away
17:47In the episode Child Abduction Is Not Funny, the parents of South Park go to great lengths to ensure their kids' safety.
17:55Stan, our abduction problems are over. We got the new child tracker.
17:59Child tracker?
18:00Despite putting clunky child tracker helmets on every kid in town, the parents soon discover a new horror thanks to their local news.
18:07The possibility that parents may abduct their own children.
18:12The study shows that the most likely abductors of children are the parents themselves!
18:17You'd think there would be one sane grown-up to call out the lunacy on display.
18:22But nope! Every kid in South Park is sent away, and Mayor McDaniels hires the CityWalk owner to build a massive wall.
18:30Ensuring nobody will be able to kidnap their kids.
18:34And so, we want you to design and build a great wall all around the city!
18:39I don't build a wall! I just own and operate a CityWalk!
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19:001. Blaming Canada For Their Children's Foul Language
19:05As a result of seeing the very adult Terrence and Phillip movie, every kid in town is swearing and calling each other inappropriate names.
19:14Rather than take it upon themselves to be parents and teach their kids why cursing isn't appropriate,
19:20the Mothers of South Park blame the whole thing on Canada and form an organization, Mothers Against Canada.
19:28The outrage eventually escalates into a war between the U.S. and Canada,
19:42and the farting comedians are taken as the U.S.' prisoners.
19:46So guys, does it make you nervous to be in America? There are a lot of organizations here that want you arrested for destroying children.
19:52Oh, they'd have to find us first!
19:54You're right. Now!
19:57Terrence and Phillip, Mothers Against Canada is placing you under citizen's arrest!
20:01This all could have been avoided had they spent a few minutes explaining to their kids what they did was wrong.
20:09I'm sorry I didn't pay attention to you, Kyle.
20:12Did we miss any major atrocities from the parents in South Park? Feel free to voice your opinion down in the comments.
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