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00:00$50,000? Where'd you get this kind of money?
00:05I can't be right, unless...
00:08Damien, I don't know where you're from, but in the real world, writing a bad check is a crime.
00:13I knew it! He doesn't have this kind of money. He's just trying to show off.
00:18This check is worthless.
00:21It's not, Leslie. Cash the check.
00:26This idiot's clothes don't even have a brand.
00:29If you're gonna pretend to be rich, try investing in some nicer clothes instead of these cheap knockoffs.
00:34Cheap, huh? This is custom made, thank you.
00:36Damien, you are an embarrassment to this family. Lying to a child to protect your poor ego. How awful!
00:45You know, I was curious why your family's business was failing, but now I see why.
00:50You guys all jumped to conclusions, and you can't see the truth when it's right in front of your face.
00:55You think I'm some poor loser? Prove it. Cash the check. Take it to the bank.
01:01And when you're ready to apologize, my wife and I will be here waiting.
01:05And when the check bounces? It won't.
01:10This is a family Christmas, and I'm done wasting my time on this loser.
01:15Agreed. Tom, help me with this.
01:19I need a drink.
01:26Who brought these Christmas gifts?
01:28They're from Damien.
01:29It's just a few gifts I got for the family. We can open them up during dinner.
01:33I really don't want to upset Dad during dinner, so I better check him out to make sure they're not too cheap or offensive.
01:37I know.
01:38Hey, tough guy. What, are you embarrassed about your Christmas gifts?
01:42What is this fuss about, huh?
01:45Grandpa.
01:48This is my husband, Damien. The one I told you about.
01:51Merry Christmas, Grandpa.
01:52Good, good. Not too tall, but handsome.
01:56You two make a lovely couple.
01:59Hey, Dad, what are you doing? Shouldn't you be resting?
02:01I couldn't wait to see my precious granddaughter.
02:06Is that a problem?
02:10Grandpa, everyone, dinner's ready.
02:26Can I help you, little girl?
02:36I'm here to get some cash from my uncle.
02:41My dad said it's fake, but my uncle Damien said it's real, and he's a nice guy.
02:46Can you help me cash it?
02:48Fifty thousand dollars?
02:50I think your uncle's playing a trick on you.
02:53I'm sorry. I didn't know.
02:58This is authentic. I'll get your cash now.
03:04Iris, where can I find a chair?
03:06Oh, you want a seat at our table when nobody wants you here?
03:11He's Iris' husband. Why don't you?
03:14Grandpa, we didn't even know Iris was married. It was random.
03:18Aren't you a little concerned that he could be coming for our family's wealth?
03:21Damien isn't like that.
03:23Iris, we're just looking out for you, okay?
03:25I mean, seriously, a guy like this, marrying the CEO of the Olsen Group,
03:30if he's not after our money, why else would he be here?
03:35That's enough.
03:37It's Christmas dinner. Everyone, be respectful.
03:41Damien, I got you a present.
03:54I think someone confused me for the dog.
03:56Good one, sis.
04:00Iris, your husband's just been begging like a pathetic dog for our family fortune.
04:04We're gonna treat him like one.
04:06Amanda, is this some kind of a joke?
04:08Actually, I'm not hungry anyway.
04:10Oh, you won't eat the food we give you.
04:12You ungrateful little gold digger.
04:15I'm confused.
04:17Okay, Grandpa, let me explain to you what everyone's thinking here.
04:21Damien doesn't deserve Iris. Not even a little.
04:25He tried to scam my daughter with a fake check.
04:27He's a terrible role model and a liar!
04:29You're a liar!
04:32Merry Christmas!
04:39The check was real, Dad!
04:44Leslie, where did you get all this?
04:46It's real.
04:47I took Uncle Damien's check to the bank and they cashed it.
04:50Thank you, Uncle Damien.
04:51Leslie, go back to the kids' table.
04:52I'm rich.
04:53The check was legit.
04:54That was 50 grand.
04:55That's more than Damien makes in a whole year.
04:56How'd you come up with this kind of cash?
04:57Damien, what's going on?
04:58Did we just assume he was poor?
04:59We did.
05:00But, you know what they say about assumptions.
05:01They make an ass out of you and me.
05:02This cannot be real.
05:03I'm rich.
05:04You know what they say about assumptions.
05:05They make an ass out of you and me.
05:06This cannot be real.
05:08I'm rich.
05:09You know what they say about assumptions.
05:11But, you know what they say about assumptions.
05:14They make an ass out of you and me.
05:17This cannot be real.
05:19Oh God, please tell me you didn't drain your measly life savings to impress us.
05:24Of course that's what he did.
05:25What a fragile ego.
05:27Draining your entire life savings just to impress a child?
05:30Ridiculous.
05:31It's shameful.
05:32Take it.
05:34You obviously need it more than many of us.
05:37Iris, I can't believe you married such a child.
05:40I can't believe you married such a pathetic man.
05:42It's sad.
05:43Damien, you don't have to do this.
05:45It's not worth going broke to impress me or my family.
05:48Iris, I'm not broke.
05:51And I don't need your money.
05:53And this is nothing compared to the gifts that I bought for your family.
05:58You'll see.
05:59I'm sorry, gifts?
06:02Gifts.
06:04Huh.
06:05Let's see them.
06:06Oh, come on Dad.
06:08He's just a poor salesman.
06:10I'm sure they're just trash.
06:12You want to see real Christmas gifts?
06:15Let's open Amanda's.
06:17She's a top executive that's consulted with Harvey Lambert's defense company.
06:22She's rich.
06:25And she gives good gifts.
06:27Hey, what about me?
06:28I've done deals with Mr. Lambert.
06:30I should get the credit.
06:31I've been keeping this family afloat.
06:33If it wasn't for me, Iris would have bankrupt this company years ago.
06:38Excuse me?
06:39The company was already in rough shape when I took over.
06:42If anything, I was the one who turned it around.
06:45The company is still failing.
06:48Iris, we can't just sit by and watch you run the Olsen Company into bankruptcy.
06:53And what exactly do you want me to do?
06:56Divorce this loser and marry Marcus.
06:58He has the funds we need.
07:00Marcus is a huge success.
07:02Go be with him.
07:04Or stick with this deadbeat and you'll be clipping supermarket coupons in no time at all.
07:09Is working with Harvey Lambert such a big deal to all of you?
07:12A big deal?
07:14Harvey Lambert runs a corporation worth billions.
07:17Something that you probably can't comprehend.
07:19Harvey Lambert's company is a subsidiary to a much larger corporation.
07:23I would know.
07:25Harvey's an employee.
07:27This pathetic guy thinks he knows about business.
07:32Harvey Lambert works for no one.
07:35No, Iris, your husband is delusional.
07:38Damien, if you think you know the first thing about a good CEO like Harvey Lambert,
07:44you need to get your head examined.
07:46Listen, I don't want to ruin Christmas over a petty fight, so...
07:50I'll call Harvey and we'll clear this right up.
07:56I told you I'd come back and I come bearing gifts.
08:00Merry Christmas, Grandpa.
08:02I'm Marcus, Iris' close friend.
08:06Oh, Marcus.
08:07I thought you had a meeting with Mr. Lambert, but you have time for us?
08:12It went great.
08:13We're officially partnering.
08:14There's much to do, but I just couldn't keep Iris out of my head.
08:19So I had to rush right back here.
08:21Marcus, you are so impressive.
08:23I wish you were my cousin-in-law instead of this loser.
08:26Be patient.
08:27That can be arranged.
08:29Oh, Marcus.
08:31Show the bottom feeder, Damien, what a real gift looks like.
08:43Iris.
08:44I don't want anything from you.
08:45A five-star golf club membership?
08:56This must be worth $30,000.
08:59Thanks, Marcus.
09:03A 49-year-old whiskey?
09:06That's 50 grand right there.
09:10Iris, check this out.
09:13It was worn at last year's Met Gala.
09:16Oh, my goodness.
09:18It's got to be worth $100,000.
09:20Mr. Lambert's having a banquet in a few days.
09:23I was hoping Iris would wear it and be my date.
09:27Marcus, this is too much.
09:30You should return it and ask for a refund.
09:32Iris, are you serious?
09:33This would look amazing on you.
09:35You would be the talk of the town.
09:37I know, Damien, it must be hard to know that you couldn't ever compare to Marcus, but you'll get over it.
09:44No, I just find it amusing that you're all so floored by what Marcus considers to be nice gifts.
09:50Okay, Damien, shut up.
09:56You're just jealous.
09:57You will never be able to afford amazing and expensive gifts like these.
10:01Marcus, don't even listen to him.
10:04He's such a leech.
10:06Iris will come to her senses and then she'll divorce him soon.
10:10And then she's all yours, you charmer.
10:17Oh, Damien.
10:23Here's what you'll never stand about the Waltons, you goddamn fool.
10:28We value sophistication, class, luxury.
10:33But if you don't think that my gifts are worthy enough, then...
10:37And lighten us.
10:39Show everybody what you got them with your tiny little bank account.
10:45Oh, Damien's gifts are probably from the dollar discount bin, I'm sure.
10:49No, no, that's too generous.
10:51More like the free donation bin.
10:53Not exactly.
10:55See for yourselves.
10:57You're just setting yourself up for embarrassment.
10:59What happens if it turns out that your gifts are worth less?
11:02Then you'll apologize to Marcus and divorce Iris.
11:06Mom!
11:07I think that's a great idea.
11:09I'll take that bet.
11:11And when my gifts are more valuable than yours, you'll apologize to Iris and I.
11:16Tom, I hear you like fishing on the open seas.
11:17Well, now you can.
11:18From your own personal yacht.
11:19It's a lazara!
11:22...
11:29I like fishing on the open seas.
11:30Well, now you can!
11:31From your own personal yacht.
11:32Tom, I hear you like fishing on the open seas.
11:37Well, now you can.
11:39From your own personal yacht.
11:47That's a Lazara.
11:49Entry level boat is 10 million.
11:52Anna, my beautiful mother-in-law.
11:54Hey, I hear you like collecting art.
12:02That's some Renaissance painting.
12:07Those go for about 40 million.
12:10And this, the only one of its kind.
12:13The Ocean Hearts diamond necklace.
12:15Worth 100 million dollars.
12:32Okay, how, how is this possible?
12:37Hmm?
12:38You had a deal.
12:40Right, Marcus?
12:42So apologize to my husband.
12:44Wasn't writing.
12:46Damien was telling the truth.
12:48He's rich.
12:49Oh, Iris, you chose so well.
12:52We were so rude to your husband.
12:54We didn't mean it.
12:56Damn it, Marcus made us do it.
12:58Wait a second.
13:00What do you say?
13:02Damien, Damien, Damien.
13:05You almost fooled me.
13:08Marcus, what are you talking about?
13:11Think about it.
13:13How does a broke idiot like this afford any of this?
13:17There's only one logical answer.
13:20They're cheap knock-offs.
13:22They're fake.
13:24Oh, you're right.
13:26I knew it.
13:28Come on, Iris, let's stick with the plan for the family.
13:32Divorce Damien and marry Marcus.
13:35Are you sure you all want to take that risk?
13:38Are you absolutely positive these are cheap fakes just because some middle manager says so?
13:46I believe Damien.
13:49Sure, it seems far-fetched for a salesman to afford such expensive gifts.
13:54But we don't know much about him.
13:56What's there to know?
13:58You seriously think that this random loser is a secret billionaire?
14:05I don't think so.
14:07Grandpa Harold, you're a smart man.
14:10You've seen luxuries, you're well-traveled.
14:12What's your expert opinion?
14:14Are my gifts cheap fakes?
14:16You've been told.
14:22I'll see you.
14:23I'm pretty happy about it.
14:28I bet you have a lot of people.
14:29You've seen luxuries, yes.
14:30I don't think so.
14:31I don't know.
14:32You've seen luxuries.
14:33I don't know.
14:34I hope you've seen luxuries.
14:35I don't know.
14:36I've seen luxuries.
14:37It's a curse here.
14:38We both have fun and fun.
14:39I mean, the product is cheap, but it's cheap.
14:41I'll know.
14:42I'll know too long.
14:43I'll know too long.
14:44I'll have to know too long.
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