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00:00From the most trusted journalists at Comedy Central,
00:07it's America's only source for news.
00:10This is The Daily Show with your host, Josh Johnson.
00:30Welcome to The Daily Show. I'm Josh Johnson.
00:33We've got so much to talk about tonight.
00:35We read some emails that should have been a meeting,
00:37an emotional support dog is about to quit on the job,
00:40and Nick Offerman has a beef with how we make beef.
00:42So, let's get into the headlines.
00:49Donald Trump's been having a pretty good time.
00:52The shutdown ended, he didn't have to concede anything,
00:54and he didn't even have to give poor people health care,
00:57his favorite kind of deal.
00:59Huh?
01:00Everything's coming up Trump.
01:02Nothing can stop the Trump train now.
01:04Breaking news.
01:05Convicted sex offender Jeffrey Epstein
01:07mentioned Donald Trump by name
01:10several times in private emails.
01:17Uh, ladies and gentlemen,
01:18the Trump train is experiencing a slight delay.
01:21There...
01:23There is an Epstein file on the tracks.
01:25We should be moving as soon as we get that cleared.
01:29Oh, but fine, Epstein mentioned Trump in an email.
01:37That doesn't mean he did anything wrong.
01:39Maybe the email was about how Trump never comes to his sex parties.
01:44Rude.
01:46I say this because I'm an American, living in America.
01:51And no matter what party you're in or who you voted for,
01:53it would be better for all of us, as a general matter,
01:56if we do not have a sexual predator as president.
01:59Because it would...
02:00It would make our country look so bad, you know?
02:09How embarrassing would that be if we, America,
02:12went from being the shining city on a hill
02:14to not being allowed within 1,000 feet of the hill.
02:17So let's just stay calm and see what the email said
02:23before we jump to conclusions.
02:25These are emails from Jeffrey Epstein to Ghislaine Maxwell.
02:27This is one from April 2, 2011.
02:30And in this email, Jeffrey Epstein writes to Ghislaine Maxwell
02:33and says, quote,
02:34Okay, uh, that doesn't sound good at all.
02:45But, you know, that dog hasn't barked could mean a lot of things.
02:49Maybe Trump's feet hurt.
02:51All right?
02:53So that's all the news in terms of bombshell emails?
02:56It's not a lot.
02:57It's not like there's an email with a journalist
02:59where he's strategizing how to blackmail Trump.
03:02Michael Wolf says, quote,
03:04I hear that CNN is planning to ask Trump tonight
03:06about his relationship with you.
03:07If he says he hasn't been on the plane or to the House,
03:10then that gives you a valuable PR and political currency.
03:13You can hang him in a way that potentially generates
03:15a positive benefit for you.
03:17Or, if it really looks like he could win,
03:19you could save him generating a debt.
03:22I like that Epstein was like,
03:27Yeah, that seems like a lot of work.
03:29I'm probably just gonna kill myself.
03:31And did he really have leverage anyway?
03:42All I've seen so far is Epstein and Maxwell
03:45saying Trump is a dog that hasn't barked.
03:47We don't know what he didn't bark about.
03:49Maybe the rest of that email clears him.
03:52I want you to realize that that dog that hasn't barked is Trump.
03:56Unnamed victim spent hours at my house with him.
03:59He has never once been mentioned.
04:01According to the released emails, Maxwell responds,
04:04I have been thinking about that.
04:06Oh, shit. I...
04:09I think the Trump train crashed.
04:11Because this isn't just not a good look.
04:14It's one of the worst looks I've ever seen.
04:16Like, I'm talking Adrian Brody in a Rostowig band.
04:23Also, why was Jeffrey Epstein writing about his crimes in emails?
04:27That's so dumb.
04:28He's firing off his Blackberry to Ghislaine like,
04:31Hey, girl, following up about the sex crimes.
04:33Uh, hope Trump doesn't snitch about the sex crimes.
04:37Hit me up if you want sex crimes this weekend.
04:39Say what you want about Donald Trump,
04:42but he knows better than to put incriminating shit in emails.
04:45He does it in person.
04:47Or on the phone.
04:48Or reportedly inside a sketch of a naked lady.
04:51But never email.
04:53Trump has to be pretty unhappy.
04:55That new evidence is coming out
04:56because he's worked so hard to prevent that.
04:59Remember, Ghislaine Maxwell got moved into a country club prison
05:02after she gave an interview saying this.
05:04I never witnessed the president
05:06in any inappropriate setting in any way.
05:09In the times that I was with him,
05:10he was a gentleman in all respects.
05:14Well, no, no.
05:16That's something.
05:17And she said it British, so you got to believe her.
05:20I don't know what she's got on him, but it must be bad.
05:26Because she didn't even exonerate him.
05:28She didn't say, Trump is innocent.
05:30All she said was, I didn't see him do anything.
05:33I also didn't see him do anything.
05:35What do I get?
05:39That's all she said, and now she's being treated like royalty.
05:42A whistleblower alleges that Ghislaine Maxwell
05:44is getting special treatment in prison.
05:47Maxwell's meals have been customized.
05:49They are delivered directly to her cell.
05:51She is personally escorted to the exercise area after hours
05:55and gets to enjoy recreation time in staff-only areas.
05:59When she wants private meetings, the warden personally arranges them,
06:02providing an assortment of snacks and refreshments for her guests.
06:05I mean, she gets to hang out in the staff areas.
06:09Can you imagine being a prison guard who can't watch TV in the break room
06:12because Ghislaine taking a nap on the couch?
06:15But this is truly insane.
06:17There is not another convicted child sex trafficker in the world
06:21who would get this kind of treatment in prison.
06:23There's actually no way within the confines of prison
06:26that her life could get any better.
06:28Add to that one more perk for the convicted sex offender.
06:32Puppy time.
06:33According to the whistleblower,
06:35an inmate who trains puppies to become service dogs
06:38was instructed to provide one to Maxwell for her time
06:41so she could play with the puppy.
06:43Do not give that dog to Ghislaine.
06:49That's not what they meant when they said,
06:51take the dog to the groomer.
07:02So, look, I don't know what Ghislaine knows
07:04about whatever Donald Trump did.
07:06All I know is that every detail that comes out
07:08makes him look more and more suspicious.
07:10And if you thought this couldn't look any worse,
07:12wait till you see the birthday card that Trump sent that dog.
07:21For more on the fallout of these new emails,
07:23let's go live to Ghislaine Maxwell's prison
07:25with our own Ronnie Chang.
07:35Ronnie, what's the latest?
07:36Well, Josh, I've been talking to White House officials,
07:39and they say this is absurd.
07:41Ghislaine Maxwell is not being treated differently
07:43from any other federal prisoner.
07:46Wait, where are you?
07:48Are you in Trump's new ballroom?
07:49I thought you were supposed to be reporting from her prison.
07:52Yeah, this is a prison.
07:53This is Ghislaine Maxwell's cell.
07:57That whole room is just for her?
07:59Yes, but it's not that nice, okay?
08:03The bed is king-size, but the pillow is only queen-size.
08:07It's like...
08:08The aesthetics are all off.
08:10Believe me, this woman is doing hard time.
08:12Whoa, whoa, whoa, hang on, hang on.
08:13Hey, can I get one of these?
08:15Wait, is this shrimp?
08:17Would you like shrimp?
08:18No, I'm allergic to shrimp.
08:20What a hellhole.
08:24Ronnie, Ronnie, come on.
08:25Most prisoners don't get past apps in their cell.
08:28Uh, I wouldn't call shrimp puffs an app, okay?
08:32It's an hors d'oeuvre at best.
08:34Let's tone down the rhetoric.
08:37The point is that Trump is clearly trying to hide something here.
08:41I mean, just look at all those e-mails.
08:43Don't take my word for it, okay?
08:44Just ask Delaine when she gets back.
08:47What do you mean, back? Where is she?
08:49Oh, I-I don't know.
08:50I think this is one of her work-from-home days.
08:53She gets work from home for prison?
08:55Yeah, but don't twist this into sounding like special treatment, okay?
08:59It's two days off, three days in.
09:01Talk about a human rights violation.
09:04Wait, wait, is that music?
09:10Yeah, yeah, yeah.
09:11I think the concert's about to start.
09:13Don't tell me they are doing a private concert for Delaine.
09:16No, no, no, no.
09:17It's not private.
09:18It's for her and her puppy, all right?
09:21Ronnie Chang, everybody.
09:24When we come back, Nick Offerman will give us his opinion,
09:27so don't go away.
09:34Welcome back to The Daily Show.
09:51We all know I've got great opinions, but I'm not the only one.
09:55Studies show that other people also have opinions.
09:58So, here with another installment of In My Opinion is our good friend, Nick Offerman.
10:10Hello. I am that guy from that show, Nick Offerman.
10:14And today, I am here to talk to you about farmers.
10:18Now, farmers aren't just guys mowing down their cornfield to build a baseball field for ghosts.
10:25They are also a vital part of America's economy and national identity.
10:31Now, luckily, they have a staunch ally.
10:33We have the greatest farmers in the world.
10:35I cherish our farmers.
10:37I'm a big farmer person.
10:38I love the farmers.
10:39I think they're great.
10:40I love the farmers.
10:41They're great.
10:42They're the greatest.
10:43The farmers love Trump.
10:44And I love the farmers.
10:46I love cows.
10:51Come on.
10:52Come on.
10:53Love is love.
10:56And I've seen that guy dance.
10:58I bet he knows his way around an utter.
11:03And look, I happen to share the non-sexual part of his affection for our farmers.
11:14I've been lucky enough to work on the small farms of people like English farmer James Rebanks
11:20and Kentucky's Mary and Wendell Berry.
11:23They let a Hollywood muckety-muck like me help with herding the cattle, scrubbing the animals,
11:28and, of course, testing the semen.
11:33No.
11:34They assured me that's the most coveted job on the farm.
11:38So please consider my hands sticky with experience.
11:42No!
11:50Wow.
11:55Unfortunately, small farms like those have been tragically disappearing for decades.
12:00According to census data, there are already 10% fewer farms than there were just five years ago.
12:05We've lost half the cattle ranchers in the United States since 1980.
12:10About 90% of the hog farmers.
12:12In the last two decades, more than 100,000 small farms have disappeared across America's landscape.
12:20America cannot afford to lose this many farms.
12:23Without them, we'll have nothing to point at and shout cow on road trips.
12:28But the real reason these small farms are going away is, in America, we don't farm to feed people.
12:36Because we are not growing food. What we're growing is ingredients.
12:39The number of farms, and what they produce for human consumption, have been on a steady decline over the past few decades in the US.
12:47Instead, what's being grown is corn and soybeans, used for livestock feed and ethanol, or as cheap sugars, starches, and oils in highly processed foods.
12:55In other words, we're not growing corn and beans to eat.
13:00They're being grown to turn them into whatever the f*** a Dorito is.
13:06I believe that is short for dirt burrito.
13:11And this is something America's farmers have known for decades.
13:15Our food system is no longer about food.
13:18It's now about corporate interests, and everything is engineered to make more profit than nutrition.
13:24Now, don't get me wrong. I enjoy junk food. I'll eat a Twinkie.
13:29I mean, they're like butt plugs. Fun in moderation.
13:33And you can stick them up your butt.
13:38Or so I've read.
13:41But as the number of small farms shrinks, the diversity of our food supply shrinks with it.
13:48And you might think, well, that can't be true.
13:50Look at all the choices I have at the grocery store.
13:52Well, look closer.
13:54Tyson, Cargill, JBS, and National Beef together control roughly 85% of all beef production in America.
14:02This bacon is a good example. You know, these look like three different choices of bacon.
14:08They're all actually the same company.
14:09You capitalist pigs have ruined our normal pigs.
14:22How dare you trick me with bacon?
14:26Like I'm some dog you're training to sit.
14:29Now, in fairness, I will present my paw for meat snacks.
14:35Nevertheless, giant food conglomerates have turned America's farms into what we call factory farms.
14:43Which is an oxymoron like bittersweet, veggie burger, or Canadian football.
14:49Well, we're all friends.
14:58Now just look at some of the wonderful benefits of our current industrial food system.
15:03Ultra processed foods make up 73% of the U.S. food supply.
15:09This actually has very real health impacts.
15:12High blood pressure, cardiovascular disease.
15:14Ultra processed foods may be linked to anxiety and depression and sleep problems.
15:19In 2015, the WHO classified ultra processed meat as carcinogenic.
15:23Jesus, I'm trying to make a BLT here, not become Spider-Man.
15:30Now you don't need me to tell you that our food system is a nightmare.
15:34We all understand in our guts that the quality of food is better in other countries.
15:40It's the one time even Fox News will praise Europe.
15:44When you go to Europe, the food is delicious.
15:46It's so fresh and you don't gain weight if you eat a big bowl of pasta.
15:50We can eat pizza. We don't gain any weight.
15:51You feel fresh, you feel clean, you come back here, you start eating pasta and you gain weight immediately.
15:56Again, so there's something wrong with our foods.
15:58Yes, why is it that the food tastes better in Europe?
16:02It's not just because you're starving after waiting in line for 12 hours to see a painting of a modestly breasted woman not smiling.
16:12It's not.
16:13It's because they prioritize organic food made on smaller farms.
16:21The average farm size in Europe is 39 acres.
16:25In America, it's 500 acres.
16:28European farms are like their bathing suits, much smaller.
16:31So you can see every detail of their meat and veg.
16:37And the good news is we can be more like Europe.
16:43But unfortunately, right now, our policies seem to be making it even harder on all our farmers.
16:48American soybean farmers have been hit hard by Trump's trade war.
16:51Cattle ranchers are furious over President Trump's plans to bring down beef prices by bringing in more from other countries.
16:58You're telling me the president is disappointing beef boys and soy boys?
17:04That's practically all the boys.
17:05So, Mr. President, please live up to your pro-farmer rhetoric.
17:13Help us refocus America's agriculture on things that Mother Nature would recognize and not the producers of high fructose corn syrup.
17:22We can change our approach to food to make it more like actual food.
17:27We can change our approach to farming to reflect respect for farmers and for the animals we consume.
17:33We can have a system...
17:36Yes.
17:39We can have a system that lives up to the words of America's greatest agrarian mind.
17:46I love cows.
17:50I couldn't agree more.
17:52But, hey, that's just my opinion.
17:58Nick Offerman, everyone.
17:59Be sure to check out Nick and the new Netflix series, Death by Lightning.
18:04Also, Nick's book, Little Woodchuck's, is out now.
18:07When we come back, Jay Judd will be joining me on the show.
18:09Don't go away.
18:10Welcome back to The Daily Show.
18:11My guest tonight is a writer, actor, and comedian whose debut special for Hulu is called Yes Ma'am.
18:31If you don't know, so cuckoldry, that's when me and my husband, together, we like to watch TV shows that did not cast me.
18:41And...
18:43Do you understand how strong I have to be to sit next to my baby and say stuff like, yeah, I told you Abbey Elementary was gonna be huge?
18:51Yeah, one of my friends works in that show.
18:54She told me, Jay, stop telling that joke.
18:56I told her, put me on the show, all right?
18:59That's how you get that joke out of my set, Janelle.
19:02Okay.
19:04Please welcome Jay Jordan.
19:05Jay Jordan.
19:26Thank you so much for coming.
19:27Thank you for having me.
19:28Yeah, absolutely.
19:29This is so cool because I actually know you.
19:31Yes.
19:32Like, I really know you.
19:33We know each other very well.
19:34We know each other so well that every now and then,
19:37you get this and I get this, people say,
19:38hey, Jay, great job on The Daily Show.
19:40And I go, okay, what segment?
19:43They go, at the desk.
19:44I go, oh, Josh.
19:47It's funny because, okay, so we got passed
19:49at the cellar around the same time.
19:52And I remember I was at the cellar waiting to go up
19:54and I was just, like, eating or something.
19:56And this person came up and they were like,
19:58dude, you the other day were so funny.
20:02You were so, and, like, your jokes were like,
20:04boom, boom, boom.
20:04It was like rapid fire.
20:05It was crazy.
20:06And in my head, I was like,
20:07I know they're not talking about me.
20:08Like, that's not even what I do.
20:10And then they told me one of your jokes.
20:13I was like, oh, this is Jay.
20:16Yeah, I was like, I'm not married to a man.
20:20Yo, thank you so much for coming.
20:22I'm so excited about your special and everything.
20:24That means a lot.
20:25Yeah, so you grew up in Mississippi.
20:27Yeah, and you grew up in Louisiana.
20:28Yes, yes.
20:29And so we're both, yeah.
20:31Look at that.
20:32Yeah, look at them.
20:34We got teeth.
20:35Look at that.
20:36See?
20:36They don't think we do.
20:41And so we've both been here now for a long time.
20:44Do you feel like a New Yorker?
20:45So I've been in New York officially 10 years,
20:47but I will never say I'm a New Yorker
20:48because I still speak to everybody on the street.
20:51I'm always like, how you doing?
20:52Hey, yeah, hey, yeah, baby.
20:54I'm still very Southern.
20:56When I see an old lady,
20:57sometimes on the train, you know this feeling.
20:59You see an older woman get on the train,
21:01you instantly get up because you're a Southern gentleman.
21:03And what you just said to her as a New Yorker,
21:05sit your old ass down.
21:06Yeah.
21:06So I don't know how to get rid of that.
21:08Yeah, no, absolutely.
21:10There's sometimes, there was...
21:12There was one time where, to your point, right?
21:16And I was new-new.
21:18I was like a month.
21:19I only lived here.
21:19Yeah, they still smelled the Creole on you.
21:21Yeah, 100%.
21:23Because then I saw this guy on the train,
21:26and it was like, it was one of like those six train stops
21:28where the gap is like slightly higher on the train
21:30than it is on the platform.
21:32And I saw a guy basically back up his wheelchair
21:35when the door was open and tried to back in,
21:37and he couldn't quite get it.
21:40And so I walked up and went ahead
21:42and like grabbed the back of it.
21:44And I was like, hey, do you need some help?
21:46And then I started pulling him in.
21:47And this dude, I pull him the rest of the way in,
21:51and he goes, yo, get up off my chair, man.
21:53And he stands up.
21:58And I was like, my bad.
22:00I didn't know I was ruining something.
22:02He's like, you're messing up my hustle, man.
22:06That's the most intimate thing you can do
22:08is like help someone back up in a wheelchair.
22:10Now, I'm still Southern.
22:11The special is about being Southern.
22:13I think it's what makes me funny.
22:15I think sometimes the juxtaposition
22:16of being Southern and sweet and slow
22:19in a fast-paced city, it creates some comedy.
22:21Yeah.
22:22Yeah.
22:23Not just sub.
22:24Oh, wow.
22:25Yeah.
22:26And so you have a BFA and an MFA.
22:31Yeah, you can say I'm in debt.
22:32You don't have to be...
22:34I got a BA, BFA, and the MFA.
22:40I was in school forever.
22:42And you went to school at Ole Miss and Alabama.
22:46Yeah, because I love being scared.
22:50And they're known as, like, NCAA schools.
22:54Yeah.
22:54Is there a theater program as strong as their, like, football?
22:57Here's the thing.
22:58No.
22:59But the theater programs were very strong.
23:03But whenever I was at both of those big SEC schools, there were times when we couldn't
23:07rehearse because they were like, hey, these kids are going to be drunk and hungover.
23:10We cannot make them rehearse with swords.
23:12We can't be doing any rapier sword fights.
23:16These kids went to the game.
23:17So every now and then, football would supersede theater.
23:21But the football culture, especially Alabama, the culture of winning, excellence, and kind
23:25of excelling and executing properly, that was in the MFA program at Alabama.
23:32At Ole Miss, it was so fun because you have, like, these party kids who really want to go
23:37to college and have the college experience.
23:38Next day, they'd be like, and now a scene from Streetcar Named Desire.
23:42Yeah.
23:42And so you, did you see much of that crossover?
23:46Like, is that how you, because to me, I also studied theater and I didn't, I didn't go
23:51as far as you.
23:52Like, I didn't, I stopped.
23:54And we did it.
23:56You're straight.
23:57God.
24:00I was trying to give you a compliment.
24:05But I know what, I know what you mean.
24:07I know what you mean.
24:07No, it's just, I think that when you have all these sort of, like,
24:12intersections happening at one time, it just gives you a lot of perspective on what people
24:15are like.
24:16And I think I see a lot of that in your stand-up.
24:19I think I see a lot of the experiences that you've had.
24:22And, and I, I see you bring more of your personality to every situation than just,
24:28uh, sort of, like, taking life for face value and stuff.
24:31So.
24:31I was lucky.
24:32I had to do that not only for myself, but also for my students.
24:34So when I got my MFA, I was a graduate teaching assistant at the University of Alabama.
24:38So I had to introduce these 18-year-olds, 19-year-olds, 20-year-olds to theater.
24:44And I had to make it interesting enough that they would sit through a 10 a.m. class when
24:48they knew we had a big SEC game the next day.
24:51They were ready to start partying.
24:52I had to be like, no, no, no.
24:53Wait, wait, wait.
24:54Y'all heard about Ibsen?
24:56Y'all know about a doll's house?
24:58This is crazy.
24:59Nora and Torvald, they getting into it.
25:02Yeah.
25:02And so in the time that you've been doing...
25:05Nerd.
25:07That was one realism nerd.
25:10That was like, doll's house.
25:14I wasn't going to say anything, and then you called it.
25:17So in the time that both of us have been doing stand-up, I feel like the landscape has changed
25:22for how to get your jokes out or how you present to people and everything.
25:27And there's a lot of this, like, old-school approach that everything happens in the club.
25:33Everyone that wants to discover good comedy should, like, buy a ticket, go to a comedy
25:36show live in person and everything.
25:38But we see so many millions of people digesting comedy through their phone, their laptop,
25:43the TV, whatever.
25:45And I guess, how are you feeling about the state of that change?
25:50I think that change is this kind of really cool new pattern of people will discover you
25:55on the phone and then come to the club.
25:57Or people see you in the club and they go back and follow you on the phone.
26:01I think it's a cycle that actually helps itself.
26:03The clips are nothing but, like, 15 to 30-second commercials for us as comedians as we, like,
26:08peddle our wares.
26:09I would love...
26:10I would love whenever people come to me after a show and they go, hey, I don't usually go
26:15to comedy clubs.
26:16They go, I don't like comedy.
26:17I don't like stand-up.
26:18But I liked your clips.
26:19So I started going to the club and I got to see all these other comics whose work I also
26:22enjoy.
26:23Because at the end of the day, what I want is for people to enjoy, not just me, but
26:26also enjoy you.
26:27I also enjoy other comedians who I think are very funny.
26:30I want people to go out and be in community.
26:33It's live theater, essentially.
26:35It's a live performance.
26:36And I think it's a really cool thing when people go, okay, this is...
26:40I'm going to look at this thing on this phone.
26:42We're all locked in the house.
26:43I'm going to look at this thing on this phone and it's going to get me out of the house
26:45and go make me be in community with other people.
26:48So I'm happy.
26:48Have you found yourself in any way attached to those outcomes, though?
27:02Like, I feel like so many comics, when you see their set, you see them thinking about
27:09the clip more than the people that are in front of them.
27:11And I feel like every time I watch you, I feel like you're really present and everything.
27:15And so I...
27:17Because I know you and because I watch a lot of comics, I don't usually pay much attention
27:23to, like, social media footprint as much as, like, what they're doing on stage.
27:27And so that's why I say that, because I feel like every time I've seen you, you're like,
27:30you're here with us, you know?
27:31Well, I want to be honest, and I think one thing that my theater background has taught
27:36me is that people love stand-up and people love crowd work and people love being in and
27:39of the moment, because theater and comedy, they're ephemeral.
27:43They're fleeting.
27:43It happens this way with this audience, with this host, with me at this moment, with this
27:47camera.
27:48It all happens just once.
27:50And when you digitize it, when you put it up, it's still a little different, because
27:54it's not in and of the moment.
27:55I think I try to stay in the moment.
27:57I also love my jokes so much.
27:59I love sharing them.
28:00I used to be so, I used to be so, like, precious with the material.
28:03You know, everyone was like this before the pandemic.
28:05They go, no, it's mine.
28:06You can't.
28:07Mm.
28:07I'm saving this joke about penises.
28:09It's...
28:10No.
28:11Yeah.
28:11By the way, speaking of penises, can I say, Nick Offerman...
28:15No, let me get it out.
28:20Nick Offerman likes twinks.
28:23That's gonna be on gay Twitter now.
28:24I want everyone to know.
28:30But, like, we used to, like, protect and hoard our stuff.
28:34Now, I feel so happy when people go, oh, I love this joke.
28:38Oh, I love this bit.
28:39And because we kind of produce a lot of material now, and because we gestate, and because the
28:43world is crazy enough, we keep having more stuff to make jokes about.
28:47I feel happy sharing my stuff.
28:48I'm very happy that people see a clip, and then they come see me.
28:51But I'm even happier if they watch the special, so...
28:54Yeah.
29:00You-you've already referenced it, but I know that sometimes comics are so precious about
29:05everything that goes in the special, everything that gets cut, and everything.
29:09Was there anything, was there any, like, story or, or, like, any idea that didn't make it
29:14in that now that it's out, you wish you would have put in?
29:17There-okay, so I-one of my favorite jokes that I didn't put in the special, simply because
29:22I, like, true-it just, like, escaped my mind because I was working with so many other
29:26things.
29:27I have this wonderful joke where I kind of talk about my core personality, where I say
29:30I'm a black queer man, also known as a gospel choir director.
29:34And that didn't-
29:35Right?
29:36Let the church say, mm-hmm.
29:37That didn't make it to the-so now I'm happy when I get to do it live for people.
29:42But that's a joke I go, oh, okay, I forgot that one.
29:44But even right now, I-I filmed the special in April, and so now I have a new hour that
29:50I'm doing that's completely different from the special, because I want people to feel
29:53like they get their money's worth.
29:54I don't, you know, I-I want people to go, oh, my gosh, Jay is really spoiling us.
29:58Because at the end of the day, as a comedian, I feel this is the industry of service and
30:02patronage.
30:03Like, I want to be funny enough that I justify the babysitting cost, the Uber cost, the ticket,
30:08the two drinks, the meal, the merch, the picture.
30:11Like, that's-that's what I want to do as a comedian.
30:15So, whenever I go, oh, I didn't get to do that joke, my creative kind of, like, north
30:21stars, I'll-I'll write another one.
30:23So, yeah.
30:23Yeah, yeah.
30:24I'm with you.
30:25Yeah, I know you.
30:26Are you pretty-oh, my God.
30:26You make more stuff than all of us.
30:28That's very kind.
30:30No, but I-what I also love, uh, about the special is that knowing you from starting and
30:37just, uh, it just feels like a really, yeah, I know-I know it's just us.
30:42Like, I know y'all, like, don't know that we know each other, but this is, like, one
30:47of the reasons I'm-I'm so excited for you is that I watched you when we were all doing,
30:51like, mics during the pandemic, which actually felt like mental illness.
30:56Oh.
30:56Like, that, like...
30:57Y'all don't even know.
30:57We were doing comedy outside every now and then, in the park.
31:01You know, if you do comedy in the park, if you don't have a microphone, you are just a
31:04man screaming in the park.
31:05Yeah.
31:06Yeah.
31:07A hundred percent.
31:10That was us.
31:11Yeah.
31:11For a little bit.
31:12A hundred percent.
31:13And so I-because I remember doing, like, they were like, oh, we're going to do a show.
31:17And I was like, where?
31:18It's-we're all going to die then.
31:20And they were like, no, it's going to be fine.
31:22We're going to do it in the park.
31:24And then, uh, I get to the park because I came because I was like, I'm about to lose my
31:28mind anyway.
31:29Yeah.
31:29And then I get to the park and they're like, hey, we actually can't use the PA system because
31:34it would be everybody talking to the same mic and the droplets, and so we would all kill
31:38each other.
31:39Yeah.
31:39And so I was like, what do you want me to do?
31:40And they were like, project.
31:43They said, use that theater train.
31:44They said, Josh, diaphragm.
31:46That's what they said.
31:47And then at one point we had the little condoms for the mics.
31:50Yeah.
31:51The little cupcake prophylactics on the mics.
31:54Y'all-y'all don't understand.
31:56I think we're joking.
31:56Yeah.
31:57This is, like, not a joke at all.
31:58Like, they did not work.
32:00Like, the idea that this piece of cloth, they were going to wrap over the mic and we
32:06would be safe.
32:06It's like, you mean a mask for the mic that we're all spitting on?
32:10And there were a couple guys who were like, I brought my own mic.
32:13I was like, ooh, you nasty.
32:16You, you, you, you, you, you on everybody's show.
32:19I know.
32:19Ugh.
32:20You a comedy hoe.
32:21And so then to see, to see you from there to getting past at the cellar, seeing you at
32:29the cellar, seeing you have your special come out is very, very beautiful.
32:32That means a lot, Josh.
32:34No, it is incredible.
32:35It's also, I, I also, I also have to say this.
32:40I have, I watched your Tonight Show set.
32:42I watched your Comedy Central New Negro set.
32:45I, like, we've always been, like, comedy peers, but I also love the work you create.
32:50And also just navigating the space, because, like, right now in comedy, sometimes, as a
32:55younger comic, you get to say something, and older comics are like, you can't do it that
33:00way.
33:00And then you go, well, why not?
33:02And they go, we've always done it this way.
33:03And so, like, to see you kind of forge your own path and to see other comics kind of, like,
33:07break these trends and kind of, like, spread out their material however they do it, that's
33:11inspiring, because you go, oh, there, there isn't just one way to do this.
33:14And that makes me very happy.
33:16And look at us now.
33:17That's crazy.
33:18That was crazy.
33:19So, before you go, I...
33:27You're kicking me out, y'all.
33:28No, no, no.
33:29It's not, it's not kicking out.
33:30I wish we could talk forever, but, you know, they, they can't stay forever.
33:33I know.
33:34And we don't want them to leave one at a time.
33:36So, I know that this, like, almost breaks host to comic, like, unspoken rule, because
33:46it is very difficult to just recite a joke out of nowhere.
33:50And it's like, I've done morning news where they've been like, well, do one of your jokes
33:54now.
33:55And you're like, ah, uh, I didn't think that far.
33:58But I'm curious, because I'm curious about you, what is your favorite joke of all time?
34:04So, I have two.
34:05I have one that's mine and one that's Wanda Sykes.
34:07So, the Wanda Sykes joke, Wanda Sykes, uh, the special I'm gonna be me, she had a joke
34:11about how she had to come out as a lesbian, and she was, she had kind of extrapolated.
34:15She said, what would it be like if I had to come out as black?
34:18And she came out as black, and her mom was like, anything but black, Lord, please, give
34:23her cancer, Jesus, anyone.
34:24And so, that's my, that's my favorite.
34:33That's, that's probably my favorite Wanda Sykes joke.
34:36My favorite joke of mine, and that's just because it's a fun little tip of the hat and
34:39a calling card, is that I say, um, I'm sorry, y'all, I'm, I'm not even gay.
34:44I just want to be marketable.
34:46I'm not gay.
34:46I'm, I'm, no, I'm not, but I'm also not straight.
34:49I'm queer, as in everybody's hot, not gay, as in remind the teacher we have homework.
34:54Uh.
35:03So, that, that's probably my favorite.
35:05That is my favorite now, too.
35:07Jay Jordan, everybody.
35:08Thank you so much.
35:09Good job, everybody.
35:11Thank you so much.
35:12Thank you for having me.
35:13No, absolutely.
35:14I have respect.
35:15This is crazy.
35:15Watch Yes, Ma'am exclusively on Hulu.
35:18Jay Jordan.
35:19We're going to take a quick break, but we'll be right back after this.
35:36That's our show for tonight.
35:37Now, here it is.
35:38Your moment is in.
35:39That's Barack Hussein Obama.
35:41Okay.
35:42This is Biden right here.
35:44Wait a second.
35:45The worst president.
35:46The profile of Biden.
35:47So he's the worst president in the history of our country.
35:50And Barack Hussein Obama's top five.
35:53Meaning bad.
35:53Are you going to replace that with his actual photo?
35:55No, I don't think so.
35:56Sorry.
35:58Sorry.
35:58Sorry.
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